The NWA’S annual King of the Death Match Tournament and SCW’S Matthew Kennedy was among the participants in the tournament, the others? Chivo, Alesksei Koji, RJ Harris, Chris Wrestling Kimo Newton, Andre Dixon, Lucian Frost, Jomary, Static Clone. Jamie Staggs, Michael Barnes, Gothika, Gianni DiLuca, Spectre, Angel The Malignant, his current rival Casey Williams and Chris Extreme, whilst Matthew is a former Roulette Champion.
Extreme Hardcore Revolution Event, Las Vegas, Nevada
June 8, 2012, 11:00am
THIS is what I must subject myself too?!
What is Extreme Hardcore Revolution you might ask? It’s a local hardcore federation in Las Vegas featuring a bunch of never-will-bes, old has-beens and untalented, unsophisticated slobs, so pretty much your typical knock off of Extreme Championship Wrestling and I am in attendance, they announced it at the beginning of the show so the fans have seen me.
But alas, I am killing my braincells for a reason, the bloody King of the Death match Tournament later on this month being held by NWA Affiliate Bad Ass Championship Wrestling, like my other interactions with the NWA this is for nothing more than to advance my own career and as much as I’d like to say that I’m the only one from risking his career by participating in this match, I’m not, Jamie Staggs, Aleksei Koji, Gothika, yes one of the Bombshells is competing, I’m just as surprised as you are and Casey Williams are also participating, I’ll be saving them for last.
The final match of the evening, and I say that in the loosest way possible just ended when the “champion” performed the worst powerbomb I have ever seen and I first saw the move performed by Sid Vicious, and as his “music” rapes the ears of everyone in attendance I hop over the rail and snatch the mic from the announcer.
MK: Cut the bloody the music, I SAID CUT THE BLOODY MUSIC!
The music cuts and everyone turns there attention to me, I, off course, cleared this with the promoter so the champion knows that his time in the spotlight is over and thus he clears the ring, to his opponent’s credit he leaves the ring whilst selling the powerbomb like a champion.
MK: Ladies and gentlemen, and I use that term loosely, you should know me from the far superior wrestling promotion known as Sin City Wrestling but I’ll introduce myself anyway, my name is “Prime Time” Matthew Kennedy and I came here to prepare myself for Bad Ass Championship Wrestling’s King Of The Deathmatch Tournament.
The crowd boos me off course, one guy even gets a Casey’s going to kill you chant going.
MK: If Williams was going to kill me then why the bloody hell would he do it on live PPV?!
That little dose of logic kills, pardon the pun, the chant, good maybe if I give them a higher dosage they’d stop coming here and this joke of a promotion dies!
MK: But what do I find? Idiots risking their careers and lives by participating in these ridiculously dangerous matches whilst a bunch of rednecks sit back and drink beer thinking that they are watching the next ECW? Say what you will about ECW’S owner and the fact that he couldn’t run a promotion to save his life but you know what the difference is between this place and ECW? ECW HAD TALENT!
The crowd boos that statement and I grin, by this point I enter the ring so that everyone can see me and the reaction is just as visceral as you’d expect.
MK: I mean bloody hell, the only two people with talent are, and one: I’m not talking about her cleavage and two: I can’t believe you wrestle with this name love, Ivanna B Onatopp and Tina Sextress, and I’m fairly certain that I’ve seen those “ladies” wrestling with their clothes off on certain internet sites if you catch my meaning.
The crowd cheers but not because of the fact that I’ve just referenced their side job, pardon the pun, but the fact that they have come out, they are pretty much two attractive, and in the case of Ivanna heavily tattooed, women who, besides the tattoos, have one difference between them, Ivanna has red hair and Tina’s blonde, other than that they’re dressed more like strippers than wrestlers.
MK: Oh there you are; tell me Tina did you enjoy reenacting the finish to one of your porn vids by having Ivanna take a dildo and penetrate you from behind with it? How is she not being arrested for sexual assault again?
The two women get angry and yell at me, in ivanna’s case she’s yelling at me in Russian off course Tina was wearing a flesh colored thong for that spot so there was no actual penetration, but the fact that that spot got approved still sickens me.
MK: Okay seriously ladies, quit this joke of a promotion and join SCW, they’d actually treat you with dignity and you wouldn’t have to rely on porn vids on the side just to make a decent buck, trust me you’ll be better off!
The two “ladies” storm off and I shake my head.
MK: However that isn’t the only reason I came here tonight, because what better place to promote my participation in the “King of the Deathmatch” tournament, and the fact that I must degrade myself to such an extent so that I can further my career saddens me to no end, but I ass, there’s seventeen other competitors in this and I’ll be saving the other SCW guys for last so let’s get started!
The crowd cheers obviously hoping that I’ll shut up soon!
MK: First on the proverbial chopping block is my opponent in the first round Michael Barnes and he is a pathetic man who thinks the fact that he’s a mixed martial artist will help him in this tournament, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the most dangerous weapon at my disposal is my mind, I am the smartest wrestler in SCW and as this tournament will soon show the whole NWA, how will I show this? By outsmarting Michael Barnes and anyone else who steps in my way.
Next up is my old friend Andre.
MK: Andre Dixon, it seems the thorough beating I gave you at Premier Wrestling’s “The Big Show” event last month wasn’t enough for you, you had to go and sign up for this tournament as well, well sunshine you came back for another shot at me? I’ll make you return to ICW on a stretcher! I defeated you once and I’ll beat you again!
It saddens me that someone of this caliber is degrading himself like this.
MK: RJ Harris, what on Earth are you doing in this tournament?! You’re the current NWA TV Champ and yet you degrade yourself by participating in this? I hope your happy with having just as much braincells as your opponent on Nightmare this week!
And now I shall address the other participants in the tournament who aren’t in SCW.
MK: As for the other Non-SCW Participants, I couldn’t care less, I have neither heard of them nor have I faced them so I’m grouping together the other Non-SCW Participants, you won’t stand a chance against me or anyone else from SCW so you may as well pack your bags and go back to your home promotion where you can cry to your boss about the competition being too tough for you!
I frowned as I reached the next part.
MK: I cannot believe that they let an SCW Bombshell compete in the tournament, not only that but they let the least ladylike of the lot in Gothika compete, well Gothika, if we do meet then I will beat you, I don’t normally hit ladies but you? You are far from a lady so I guess you are far game at King of the Deathmatch!
My frown deepened.
MK: Aleksei Koji…..
The crowd cheers at that, apparently he’s pretty popular.
MK: This place is full of Koji fans? That explains a lot, Koji, if it weren’t for you I would still be holding the SCW Roulette Championship because then I wouldn’t have to focus on two challengers for the SCW Roulette Championship and Williams would be in his rightful place as the challenger, needless to say Koji, you had better pray to whatever god you pray to that you do not face me!
I grin at this next part; I’m about to trash talk Jamie.
MK: Jamie Staggs, tell me, how does it feel knowing that the man who put a family member in the hospital is walking free? The same goes for the man who orchestrated it, what’s that? The case hasn’t even reached court yet? Give it up son, I have one of the best legal teams ever put together on my side and they’ll ensure that your brother’s attack goes unpunished, good luck concentrating on the tournament whilst that is on your mind!
Last but not least, my nemesis Casey Williams.
MK: Casey, you have something I want, the SCW Roulette Championship but it wasn’t enough for you to go after me in SCW was it? You had to follow my lead and sign up for this ridiculous tournament, Williams; I hope we meet in the final round because then I can put this pointless feud to rest once and for all.
I grin as another “Casey’s Gonna Kill You” chant starts.
MK: Do I really have to point out the absurd logic in that chant again?!
The chant stops and I decide to wrap things up.
MK: I have wasted enough of your time and mine so this goes out to everyone else competing in the KODM tournament but especially too Casey Williams, Aleksei Koji, Gothika, Jamie Staggs, RJ Harris and Michael Barnes, you step into the ring with me and you’ll realize that beneath this handsome face lies the mind of a wrestling genius, someone who you can’t outsmart or outwrestle, in short, my name is “Prime Time” Matthew Kennedy and everyone else competing at the King of the Deathmatch Tournament is about to be cancelled.
I left the ring and the auditorium where the show’s being held via the crowd as the scene fades.
