[Steve Ramone]

 With Steve’s recent problems with Tim Staggs of The Nobodies he needed a distraction from it all, unfortunately for him that distraction was coming in the form of a match against Simon Jones this week on Climax Control and despite Simon’s problems with his protégé Natalie McKinley’s gambling problem he wasn’t about to back down from a fight but can Steve win?

Steve’s hotel room, Asuncion, Paraguay
Friday the 25th of December 2015, 21:00pm

They say that it’s a roll of the dice, luck of a draw, spin of the Roulette Wheel, whether or not lady luck’s on ya side, some days aren’t just gonna go your way!

And I’ve used up all the gambling metaphors that I could think off already, things are off to a great start already, aren’t they?

Yeah encase you can’t tell I’m going to be harping on how Natalie McKinley’s gambling addiction basically ruined Simon’s chances at winning the SCW Heavyweight Title back at Summer XXXTreme III, why? Why not? It’s an easy target and besides, it was inevitable that someone was going to use that against Simon whenever he faced them and low and behold, here I am!

Besides, we’re taking advantage of a weekly thing we do every Friday night to illustrate this point.

What’s the thing we do? We play a friendly round of poker in my hotel room, no money involved before you ask just us and a poker set that I brought from Amazon back in January, the only reason I’ve waited until now to use it on camera is because a good opportunity to do so never really revealed itself to us.

The set we’re using is the Pro Poker Texas Hold’Em Set, I basically got it on Corey’s suggestion as he said that it was a good set for a complete beginner like me and by extension Cyrus and Andreas and we took to it pretty well, sure we had some roadblocks along the way but we’ve gotten pretty good at it.

And no, I won’t be quitting wrestling to take up professional poker, I’m pretty sure that I’d get destroyed within a few turns if I tried that.

“Okay, I call a thousand.” Cyrus announced as he placed his chips down, Andreas was acting as the dealer with the roll of dealer being rotated between the three of us and it would be my turn after this round. “Are you in Steve?”

“Yeah, I’m calling as well.” I responded as I placed my chips down and we moved the chips to the centre of the table as the first card was played by Andreas, this continued for a couple of turns with us simply checking (passing the turn) between rounds, at least until the last card was played. “You know what?” I asked rhetorically as I placed all my cards down. “I’m going all in.”

“Playing for keeps huh?” Cyrus asked and I nodded, once he had a look at his cards Cyrus grinned. “I’ll match it then.” Cyrus said as he placed the chips down and it was moved to the middle of the table, there was no way I could lose, I had a straight to A!

“Do I even need to ask you guys to reveal your cards?” Andreas asked and we shook our heads before I revealed my cards. “Straight to A, Cyrus will need a lot of work to beat that.”

“I know, that’s why I went all in!” I responded with a cocky grin…..that quickly disappeared when Cyrus revealed his two cards. “Flush to A?!”

“Cyrus wins!” Andreas said as he returned the chips to us and I took his place as dealer. “Isn’t this a little on the nose for your match against Simon? You know, filming a promo that’s mostly based around gambling when Natalie had a gambling problem?”

“Natalie McKinley’s gambling problem basically cost Simon his last chance at the SCW Heavyweight Title, I’d be stupid not to mention it.” I responded as I laid out the first two cards and watched as they played. “Besides, this is pretty much my best way to rub in that fact! The idea to base the promo around our poker game and the poker metaphors came later.”

“You mean after you did a Google search for gambling terms after you ran out of metaphors.” Cyrus pointed out and I put my hands up defensively.

“No one said I was perfect, I’m pretty close to perfect but that’s beside the point.” I responded as they both called a thousand and I played a third card, the cards in the middle of the table where basically laid out like this: king of hearts, ten of clubs and ace of spades and yes, I have the Motorhead song stuck in my head thanks to that last card. “You guys mind if I do my promo whilst you play?”

“Go ahead.” They responded and I grinned before turning to the camera.

“Hey Simon, is Natalie watching with you? If yes then this scene should look very familiar to her!” I said as the camera panned around the table. “Poor little Nattie couldn’t control her gambling addiction and it came to bite you in the ass when you were about to win the SCW Heavyweight Title! The fact that you still associate with her after that fiasco is still surprising to me!”

I said as the boys continued to play.

“Natalie may be cured of her addiction now but something tells me that she’s never going to live this down! And the fact that I’m basically going to rub in that fact throughout this entire promo will probably not help matters! Call it a hunch! Like I said, she may be cured but I don’t think that lady luck is on your side in this match Simon!”

And yes, I have loads of gambling metaphors to go through.

“It was a really shitty luck of the draw for you when Natalie’s bookies decided to make her cost you the title just under two months ago but hey, some say that life in general is a roll of a dice! And by some I mean just me! You may be a fantastic wrestler Simon but I’ve got the brains to ensure that anyone betting against me in this match will be shit out of luck!”

It’s that simple.

“In a way I kinda have to thank you Simon because if it weren’t for you I’d still be a goodie two shoes ass kisser, basically a Drake Greene from New York! Hell for the longest time I was just a poor man’s version of Drake Greene but you managing to beat me in the middle of the ring during that mixed tag team match set me on my current path and I aint looking back! Will history repeat itself?”

Can I get a hell no?

“I don’t have an idiot dragging me down in this match Simon and that will be the ultimate cause of your defeat, and who knows? Maybe I’ll get a Heavyweight Title Shot after I beat you? I can guarantee that I won’t be screwed over by a gambling addict because my associates have a little thing that Natalie lacks, common sense!”

That’s right! I went there!

“Natalie’s a talented wrestler in her own right but she’s also dumb as a bag of bricks! I mean seriously, if she had any common sense you’d be the champ by now because she wouldn’t have gotten addicted to gambling in the first place! And hell, how do we know that she hasn’t regressed? She may have said on Twitter that she doesn’t gamble anymore but I’d honestly believe that an elephant can win a high dive competition before I believe her!”

“That’s got to be the strangest metaphor I’ve ever heard!” Cyrus commented as they continued to play and I shook my head.

“I try my best.” I responded before picking up where I left off. “At the end of the day it’s all down to lady luck and I have a strong feeling that she is on my side in this match Simon! You may claim otherwise but at the end of the day it’s all down to the luck of the draw….” I commented as Andreas won the round. “Like Andreas just demonstrated.”

I said as I switched positions with Cyrus and I decided to wrap things up.

“How good is your poker face Simon? Don’t answer that because it won’t matter! When we face off on Climax Control this Sunday it’ll be snake eyes for you and a double six for me because I will beat you in the middle of the ring with a little help from Lady Luck and a lot of help from my skill in the ring! This message has been paid for and delivered by “The Fearless One” Steve Ramone, remember kids, don’t let your protégés get addicted to gambling!”

I resumed playing as the scene fades.