[Giani Di Luca]

 {Party Rock Anthem}

That’s right ladies and gentlemen… bro’s and ho’s… It’s time to beat up some beats! After the long wait, “Fuhgeddaboudit” finally returns on Sunday Night, immediately following the web cast of Sin City Wrestling’s Climax Control.  Everyone’s favorite guilty pleasure show, with more drama than a Mean Girls Twitter War, only you can fast forward this one!  Here is what you can look forward to for this season!

Dramatic music plays as the front door to the shore house opens up, showing Giani Di Luca walking through the door.  He has an all business look on his face as he sets his bags down on the ground next to him, staring at the other seven house mates for the summer, taking his time to stare at each and every one of them.  The music intensifies as we show a brief clip from about a year and a half ago, where Giani punches his bro, Tony, straight in the jaw while yelling that he’s the fuckin’ show and always was.  We fade back to the shore house to see Louie and Bianca staring with their mouths gaping wide in shock, waiting for him to explode on them once more.  He narrows his eyes as he stares at the crowd in front of him, his nostrils flaring out for a moment before he throws his hands up in the air.

Giani:  Ey!  Fuhgeddaboudit!

He smiles and does his obnoxious signature laugh, which causes his house mates to cheer and some of them crowd around him, giving him fist bumps and bro hugs galore.  Candy pushes past them and the small, slightly heavier girl jumps into Giani’s arms and covers his face in friendly kisses as she talks to him in Italian, before Dixie comes walking through the door, and everyone stares at her.

We switch to see the image of Giani and Dixie soaking in the hot tub in a rather intimate manner as Tony gets in, trying to come between the two.  Fast forward to a later point, and we see the two about ready to duke it out once again, but this time, it is Giani who is holding back his anger as best he can.

Giani:  Bro?  Bro, seriously, don’t push that button…

Tony:  Or what?  You gonna clock me again, assh*le?  C’mon! Prove to everyone that ya just in this for a (beep)in’ paycheck!

Giani:  Someone get this drunk fool off me, for real…

We see Dixie’s eyes widen as she stares from the window, watching Giani lowering his head in shame before walking out of the door.  Before it closes, Dixie can be seen rushing toward it, shouting in Giani’s direction.

Dixie:  If you leave this porch, we’re through!  No one walks out on me like that, understand me?!

We fast forward to see Dixie smack Giani upside his head during what appears to be an argument.  Giani purses his lips as his eyes widen.  He shakes his head and waves her off as he storms off again.  Dixie is seen crying inside of the shore house much later, and Giani walks back inside, leaning on the door frame.

Giani:  No girl has ever… EVER put her (beep)in’ hands on me before. And no girl ever will again.  I don’t disrespect you by puttin’ my hands on you, so don’t disrespect me that way!

Dixie:  I’m sorry!

The two cuddle in their bed, before we fast forward to a date night with the two on the Boardwalk.  Right outside of the Ferris Wheel, Giani kneels down in front of Dixie, reaching into his cheesy blazer jacket before pulling out a black box.

Dixie:  Are… are you serious right now?

Giani:  Dixie Waters… will you do me the honors of…

We immediately cut out on Dixie’s shocked face as the intro to the show starts.

FUHGEDDABOUDIT!

{Everyday I’m Shufflin’}

“Party Rock Anthem” by LMFAO plays loudly as we see clips, introducing the cast members for this season of Fuhgeddaboudit.  First up, we see Giani Di Luca partying it up in various clubs around the Jersey Shore, mixed with a few spots of his wrestling career from BACW and more notably SCW with his signature laugh echoing in the background.  We’re followed up by the cold and calculated Bianca Santora, confronting Carla, waving her finger and pointing, digging her finger into her chest, followed by a clip of her getting into a catfight inside of Club Karma.  Then Ricky Mancini is seen holding his arms out with a dumbfounded look as a girl actually turns him down.  We then see him whipping his shirt around above his head at the Beachside Bar to the beat of the music. We switch over to Candy Constantino who is getting in Bianca’s face, despite her size disadvantage, refusing the back down.  She then can be seen doing a table dance on the rooftop hang out before falling off and laughing.  Tony Esposito comes up next with clips of him and Giani working out in the gym while Giani trains.  We then see him flirting with some girls on the Boardwalk as they fall for every line of his.  Next up, we see Toni Colombo reeling in the men with her extra short skirt and very revealing top as she dances inside Club Karma.  She bends over and does the Jersey Turnpike dance move on one guy who loves every minute of it.  Next up, we see Louie Rossi emptying a container of Nair into a bottle of shampoo while holding one finger up to his lips and smiling.  He tightens the cap and then walks out of the bathroom as Giani walks in with a towel.  Louie smiles and tries to contain his laughter as he quickly walks out.  We then see a clip of him wearing a fedora and sitting on a lounge inside of a club while his appeal seems to attract a few ladies. Next, we see Carla Giordano’s infamous strip tease, censored of course.  Later on, we see her running into her room, embarrassed of her actions as Toni follows to comfort her.  Last up, we see quick flashes of Dixie Waters and Barry Goldstein.  Dixie is seen walking the Boardwalk with Giani, kissing him by the Ferris Wheel, while Barry can be seen shouting into his office phone, slamming the receiver down before looking over to Giani, shaking his head with a fake smile.  The intro ends with Giani shouting “Fuhgeddaboudit!” followed by his infamous laugh.

{{Scene One:  The Arrival}}

Who doesn’t love a good reunion?  Especially one that brings everyone back to their hometown for a summer filled with shameless partying, sex, drama, and all the gritty, dirty deeds that go along with a good time.  Normally, each season starts off with the various housemates showing up excitedly, laying claim to their favorite rooms, breaking out the liquor bottles, and kicking off the summer just right.  However, this time?  The mood is rather somber, as one by one, the housemates show up, looking nervous or upset to be here.  Carla, the quiet one, arrives first and sighs as she drops her bag by the front door.

Carla:  Hello?  Anybody here?  Geez, it’s startin’ to feel like I’m in a horruh movie er somethin’…

Her soft voice has a hint of sarcasm to it, which is something new for her.  She walks through the house, looking behind doors and under beds until she realizes that no one else is there.  She shrugs her shoulders and heads back to the foyer where she is startled to see the door fly open.  Ricky Mancini has about five duffel bags in his arms, but he drops them instantly as he opens his arms and Carla squeals before jumping into them giving him a kiss.

Ricky:  Baby, it’s been all of two days, but ya know I missed ya!  Can ya just feel the excitement in the air?

Carla:  Yeah no… Why did we even agree to this?

Ricky rubs his fingers together to signal that it’s all about the money.  She sighs as she slides out of his arms.  She motions toward the hallway leading to the bedrooms.

Carla:  I hear we have competition for the single bed bedroom this summer. Giani’s got some blonde bimbo er somethin’ he’s bringin’ with ‘em.

Ricky’s face sours as he hears Giani’s name.  He grabs his bags as well as Carla’s and they head back to claim the room.  As they do, the door opens once more and Tony walks inside.  He’s got a couple bags, but they seem rather light.  He looks around, hearing Carla and Ricky’s voices in the background, but he remains quiet, stroking his hair as he drops his bags and walks over to the white leather couch.  He plops down on it and kicks his feet up on it while he watches the door intensely.  It doesn’t take long before Bianca comes walking in, only this time, she’s got company.  She has two personal assistants that have their arms full of her luggage as she carries a small purse, and a kennel.  She rolls her eyes as she looks at Tony, and then points to the back room.

Bianca:  The usual. Ya better know what I’m tawkin’ about, or I’m docking ya pay…

Bianca walks to the refrigerator and opens it as she pulls out a bottled water.  She unscrews the cap and then takes a sip as she looks over at the solemn Tony.  She giggles as she studies his misery, picking it apart carefully. Tony glares back at her, shaking his head.  She crinkles her nose and raises her shoulders as the giggling slowly fades into a long winded sigh.

Bianca:  Hi, Tony… Long time, no…

Tony:  Aww can it, B. I really ain’t in the mood for none-uh ya shit, aight?

Bianca shrugs her shoulders, though her eyes rest firmly on him for the time being.  He stares right back, and a tension builds.  Tony is wishing someone else would walk through the door and break this staring contest up, but no such luck.  Finally, Bianca gives in and breaks the silence for him.

Bianca:  So… ya must be so excited that ya get to spend the entire summer with ya little butt buddy, Giani, right?  I mean, he’s such a (beep)in’ swell guy, right?  He’s redeemed himself or some other bullsh…

Tony:  What part of shut ya (beep)in’ trap did ya not understand?  I got other things on my mind.

Bianca:  Oh… clearly…

Bianca gets a fake serious look on her face as she nods her head slowly.  She shrugs her shoulders and shakes her head as she flips him a blurred out bird, muttering what can only be assumed as “Get the (beep) outta here…” as she turns and walks away.  The door opens to see Candy come inside.  She looks around nervously, but that quickly fades as she screams excitedly.  She rushes over to Tony and does a one woman dog pile on him, even going as far as to cover his face in kisses.

Candy:  Oh my gawwwd, Tony… I’m surprised to see ya here, for real.  Ohhh, how ya been?

Tony:  Geez, Candy… Ya gonna hump my leg next?  Where were ya five minutes ago when her royal majesty arrived and decided to start bustin’ my bawls?

Candy groans as she looks over to see Bianca texting on her phone, acting as if she wasn’t paying attention, when clearly she is.  Candy sticks her tongue out at her and then rubs Tony’s cheek carefully.  Before they can fully catch up, Louie comes in and lets out a loud “Eyyyyyyyy!” as he drops his bag on the pile that has formed by the door.  He casually walks by, getting a fist bump from Tony, and a sweet hug from Candy.  He turns with his arms opened toward Bianca, whose eyes are still on her phone, and she scoffs, holding a hand up in his direction.  He carefully removes his hat, and then graciously bows to her like a true gentleman before laughing.  He goes walking through the halls as Bianca rolls her eyes as Toni walks in, kissing a guy before they begin softly talking.  Toni shoves him toward the door, motioning for him to leave before she joins the others in the living room.  Within a few minutes, everyone comes back to the living room to catch up, some hoping that this would conclude the cast reveals for the summer.

Tony:  Maybe we’ll be lucky and the jackass won’t even show up.

Candy:  Yeah…

Bianca:  I don’t know. Giani was the shinin’ star of the show, right?

Everyone looks up in shock as Bianca actually sounds genuine in saying this.  She glares at each of them individually, and without a word, she shrugs her shoulders, flipping her hair over her shoulder before returning her attention to the phone.

{Cut Scene: Bianca S.}

We fade quickly into the green room where we see Bianca sitting in the chair, ready to give us her most intimate thoughts, with the image of the Boardwalk displayed behind her.

Bianca:  I don’t know why everyone’s so down on Giani this summer.  It ain’t like he’s bein’ some fake little wannabe juicehead. He’s like a for real badass now.  Like “for real” for real.  He earned my respect last year.  I for one can’t wait to see him and meet his little blonde skank… I mean… girlfriend…

Bianca smirks and winks, with a cheesy star sparkling edited to the corner of her eye and pearly white teeth.  She giggles as we fade back.

{End Cut Scene}

Everyone is still staring at Bianca in shock while Tony gets up from his seat.  He walks over to the refrigerator and pulls it open to get a longneck beer from inside.  He cracks the top off and takes a long swig before looking right at Bianca.

Tony:  Where the (beep) did that come from, Drama Queen?  Are ya startin’ ya games early this year, or do ya got a problem with me?  That d(beep)head punched me in my (beep)in’ face, and everyone saw ya smilin’ in the corner like it was the most entertainin’ shit ya heard all year.

Bianca:  It wasn’t like that, Tony.  Believe me, it wasn’t like that.

Bianca shakes her head, holding her hands up innocently.  She looks around at everyone else who is rolling their eyes at her fakeness, and already plotting on how to avoid her for the entirety of the summer.  She finally looks back to Tony and then an evil grin comes over her face.

Bianca:  It wasn’t *air quotes* like… that.  It WAS that.  That shit was funny as hell, cause I thought ya head was gonna spin around like The Exorcist.  (Beep)in’ hilarious…

Tony:  You better hope that punk ass b*tch don’t decide to start some shit this summer, because I will put him back in his place!

Bianca:  Oh, like ya did at Karma last October?  Even with ya boys around, you didn’t do shit…

Tony:  I’ll handle that little b*tch, just you…

The door suddenly opens up, and the loud dramatic music starts up.  Giani walks in, and all eyes are on him.  No one makes a sound as Candy covers her mouth in shock.  Giani looks at each and every one of the people in the room with an intense look on his face.  The tension has reached an all time high as Giani throws his arms up in the air, exclaiming “Fuhgeddaboudit!”  The housemates look relieved as they cheer, seeing the Giani they once knew.  Everyone but Tony and Bianca crowd around him, patting him on the shoulder, as Candy jumps into his arms kissing his face.

Candy:  I’ve missed you, Gi!

Giani:  Awww, I missed ya too, broski!  I missed all of ya, even Bianca! Hahaha!

Everyone laughs as Bianca rolls her eyes.  She slowly stands up from the kitchen stool and walks to the center of the living room, looking at everyone and scoffing loud enough to be heard over all of the chattering.

Bianca:  You people sit up here all day long and call me a fake ass b*tch, and say I tawk behind people’s backs.  What the (beep) did you mother(beep)er’s just get done doin’?  I thought I was at a Giani Di Luca roast, what with Tony tawkin’ about puttin’ his *air quotes* b*tch ass back in his place, and the rest of ya’s noddin’ and sh*t.  But when he wawk’s in, all of a sudden he’s ya best friend?  Please, he’s ya (beep)in’ paycheck, ya fake ass b*tches…

Giani opens his eyes and just blinks as Bianca has the first outburst of the season, true story!  He raises the corner of his mouth as he sets Candy back down.  He looks around as people begin to disperse, avoiding the awful truth that Bianca just dropped on them all.  Giani looks back to Bianca and narrows his eyes at her.

Giani:  And I’m sure you was the ring leader of my roast, right?

Bianca:  ACTUALLY… *I* was the one who was sayin’ I couldn’t wait for ya to come back so I could apologize to ya face for what happened almost 3 years ago. I’m sorry I chased ya off, but ya know what?  I’m even more sorry that these assholes got ya so blind that ya can’t see how full of sh*t they really are.  But I am sorry, whether ya believe me or not.

Giani holds a hand out, in an attempt to calm Bianca down.  Bianca rolls her eyes furiously as she tucks her hair behind her ear.  She purses her lips as she growls under her breath.  This whole reunion is changed up a bit as Dixie comes walking in, using Giani as a shield against the obvious drama that has started already.  Her big eyes are even bigger as she stares around nervously.  She peeks her head from behind Giani and gently waves her hand as she lets out a friendly, yet mousey “Hi…”  Bianca stares at her with narrowed eyes and opens her mouth to mutter a simple “Hi…” in return, though hers is much louder and much less friendly.  She turns around and disappears down the hallway.  Giani reaches back and pulls Dixie closer, comforting her as Candy comes up.

Candy:  Hiiii… I’m Candy, and this over here is Carla, Tony…

As Candy starts to give Dixie the friendly introductions, hoping to be her bestie for the summer, Louie pats Giani on the back, as does Ricky, Toni, and Carla.  They take their leave, which only leaves Tony and Giani to stare at each other.  Giani sighs and lowers his eyes as he walks over to Tony apologetically.

Giani:  Bro… man… look…

Tony:  First off, I ain’t ya bro.  That flew out the freakin’ window with my bicuspid filling.

Giani:  I’m sorry bro, I really am.

Tony narrows his eyes at Giani as he gets in closer.  He surprises Giani by giving him a tight bro hug.  Giani is relieved as he pats his friend’s back.  He is about to speak, but realizes that Tony is tightening his grip, letting the hug linger a bit too long.  Tony leans in and whispers in Giani’s ear, but loud enough for Dixie, Candy, and apparently Bianca to hear.

Tony:  We ain’t brothers no more. Second off, ya might got the perfect blonde b*tch by ya side, and ya might have everyone buyin’ ya bullsh*t… but I ain’t. And I’m gonna prove ya full of sh*t.  Watch ya back, cause I’m gonna catch ya when ya slip up… “bro”…

Tony uses his shoulder to check Giani into the nearby partition wall before exiting the room backward, staring right at Giani.  Candy looks shocked as she still has Dixie’s hand in hers, and her mouth gaped open.  She goes to speak, but Giani just waves it off, though the hurt is very apparent on his face.  Dixie politely excuses herself from Candy and goes to comfort Giani as we fade out.

{COMMERCIAL BREAK: Brought to you by Smart Water “Be a Serious Baller: Don’t hate the player (or the electrolyte-enhanced hydration”}

{Everyday I’m Shufflin’}

{{Scene Two: Another Arrival))
*Sunday October 12th, Climax Control- Fort Benning Military Base, Chattahoochee County, Georgia

The crowd is alive as the show is heating up for the Main Event where Steve Ramone is set to challenge Drake Green for the SCW Heavyweight Championship.  However, things might have gotten a bit overdone during the last match.  While Drake Green’s name could be heard in the background as Justin Decent is giving a brief speech regarding the award for Man and Wrestler of the Year awards, respectively.  The voiceover can be heard as the fans watch the closed circuit television, nodding their head in agreement about Drake Green’s accomplishments.  We can see Giani helping Equinox back through the curtains as they are met by the medical team.  Giani nods his head as he looks over at Equinox, reassuringly.

Giani:  Dawg, ya gonna be alright. Ya taken worse bumps in ya title defenses.

Equinox:  I just don’t understand why these fools find it amusing to attack me, in front of my Jokers. Together, we will make them pay.

Giani:  They’re jealous of ya success, bro.  It’s that simple. Ya got a target on ya back with that title, and it grows bigger the longer ya keep holdin’ onto it.  Look, get yaself taken care of, and we’ll go tear down the Georgia nightclubs with enough alcohol to buzz an elephant, aight?

Equinox nods his head, wincing a bit as the medical team helps him on.  The military men and women who are backstage getting refreshments see the two and they cheer Equinox on, as well as Giani.  Giani smiles, but his eyes are drawn to the television as something flashes across the bottom of the screen with Drake’s Man of the Year award.

<marquee> RUNNERS UP: 1) Sean Jackson 2) (TIE) Ben Jordan (and) Simon Jones (and) Giani Di Luca (and) Goth</marquee>

Giani’s smirk slowly fades from his face as he looks down at the ground.  Being nominated was such an honor, and the fact that he even placed was amazing.  Someone who was used to getting attention, accolades, championships, and anything else that he could ever have wanted, might have just the slightest bit of a hard time not winning.  And being tied with a man who last referred to him as a viper, a snake… and a man who he had a bitter rivalry with that spanned two different championship reigns… and the third, a man who ended his lengthy Heavyweight title reign... might have been something that didn’t set too well with him.  He and Ben Jordan had enjoyed a World Cup party at Ben’s place, where many different SCW stars and Bombshells had attended, but there was never any type of mending done, and the fact that Giani wore a Team Italy jersey didn’t help matters!

*Ahem*

The harsh clearing of the throat draws Giani back to reality as he smiles, turning around to address the fan who was likely there to tell him what a good deed he had just done.  He reaches into his jean pocket and pulls out a sharpie to sign an autograph when he notices Holly Wood standing there… with a microphone?  He crinkles his nose in confusion before shaking his head.

Giani:  Don’t tell me ya ladies roughed up Rocky or Pussy, and now ya takin’ over the interview team too…

Holly:  What?  No, not at all… Wait, if I tell you that I did, would you rough me up a little bit?

Giani:  Yeah, no… I’m into blondes and all, but I’m in a committed relationship. Plus, I prefer nice girls.

Holly runs her tongue across her bottom lip, shimmering with cherry red and gloss that shines in the light.  She can’t help but groan a little as she takes in Giani’s shirtless physique, begging him with her eyes to make his pecs dance.  Her neatly manicured nails reach for them, but Giani stops her.

Giani:  Getting’ handsy, ladyboy?

Holly:  Hun-ty!  That’s NOT okay for you to say, mmmkay?  Besides, I ain’t no Mean Girl anymore.  I walked out on them, and now I’m trying to find extra ways to make some money.  I’m trying out for the interview team.

Giani:  So ya smartened up and walked out on em?  I was afraid I might have to kick ya ass when I returned…

Holly:  Kick, lick… whatever floats that boat of yours…

Giani shudders a bit.  Not that he was the least bit homophobic, but such a thought never crossed his mind.  He runs his hands over the back of his head as he desperately tries to think of a way to change the subject, and quick.

Giani:  Bro, er… sis?  Whatever it is, um… interview!  How about that interview?

Holly:  Yes!  Interview.  Maybe we could take this to the locker room so you can get cleaned up.  We know you take pride in your appearance, and we wouldn’t want you to look all sweaty and yummy, I mean gross, now would we?  I’ll get your back…

Giani:  I think I’m okay.  Sweatin’ is part of this gig.  Besides, I don’t know if I trust ya in a locker room with me, especially with a camera.  I’ll see my ass plastered all over the net.

Holly tilts her head back and chuckles politely.  This eases Giani’s tension slightly as she playfully pats his shoulders.

Holly:  As if I wasn’t already all over the net.  Believe me, I know.  You got the best ass in SCW, but you know who has the longest, thickest…?

Holly makes a fist and presses her elbow against her crotch, flexing her arm.  Giani’s mouth gapes open as he laughs nervously.

Holly:  Hm?  Care to take a guess?  That title belongs to someone whose name starts with Jon, and ends in…

Giani: Dooooooough-kay! I mean okay!

Holly:  *Gasp* You’re a looker! I knew it!

Giani:  No! Has anyone ever told ya that ya suck with interviews?

Holly: With interviews, no… Hey, I thought I was supposed to ask the questions here.

Giani:  THEN ASK! Geez-us!  C’mon! There’s so much material waitin’ for ya.  Where ya been?  Why’d ya come back?  The reality show?

Holly thinks it over for a second and then shakes her head, groaning as if to let him know that such subjects didn’t interest her.  She pulls a folded up piece of paper out of her bra and flings it open in one fell swoop.  She looks down at the paper and then taps at it hard to show Giani.

Holly:  That’s what I wanna ask.  That seems like a hard nosed question that anybody in their right mind would ask.  How do you feel about that?

Giani squints as he looks down at the paper, which is drenched and running with a bit of fake boob sweat.  He closes one eye carefully, but still can’t make it out and he shrugs his shoulders.

Giani:  I feel like I need to give my brain a shower.  But unfortunately, this conversation won’t wash out without a lobotomy.  I can’t read that.

Holly:  Get you some glasses babygurl… You’re facing Sean Jackson next week on Climax Control, and everyone wants to know…

Holly gets a very serious look on her face, but Giani is still shocked that he’s booked so quickly.  He scratches his head as he tries to come up with something meaningful to say about facing someone he’s never once faced, and has no idea what to expect, despite the massive reputation that precedes Jackson.

Giani:  Dawg… I seriously don’t kn…

Holly: … will you take this disposable camera and snap a few pictures of his ass up close?  He chases me off any time I get within five feet of his honeybuns…

Giani:  Seriously, dawg?  People wanna know if I’m gonna snap pictures of Sean Jackson’s ass during our match?  Like who?

Holly’s mouth gapes open as she looks highly offended by Giani’s accusations.  She places one hand on her hip as she brings the microphone to her lips, ready to sass Giani.

Holly:  So what, now I’m not people?  Are you saying that I am not {i]a person?[/i]  I find that rude, AND hurtful Mr. Di Luca.  I think you owe me an apology, and a shirtless hug… in a shower stall.  It’s only fair.

Giani:  I never said… Aww Fuhgeddaboudit… I’m gonna make this easy for you.  I’m back because I wanted to promote the reunion season of the hit reality television show that gave me my big breakthrough, Fuhgeddaboudit.  That’s also where I was during my absence.  I was set to promote this last week, but I missed my flight. I was waitin’ around to see if Erik or Christian could find a spot for me to plug.

Holly snickers and is ready to make a comment when Giani holds a hand up in her face, gently stroking her cheek to calm her down before returning his attention back to the camera.

Giani:  I saw Hawkes and Ringo jump Equinox, and it reminded me of the unfinished problems I had with that coattail ridin’ ass clown of a tag team partner I once had.  I didn’t even know what I was doin’. Next thing I know, I’m in the ring kickin’ ass, and lovin’ it.

Holly:  That’s not true. SCW don’t just book people who jump the barricade, or else everyone would be jumpin’ the barricade.

Giani:  My agent Barry had me sign a bunch of boring legal mumbo jumbo… might have somethin’ to do with that.  Either way, I don’t back down from any fight.  Not from Ringo, not from a tatted up pussy like Hawkes, and not from the ear rapist, Sean Jackson.  Dude’s hung like a Tic Tac…

Holly: *Gasp* LOOKER! You probably lingered too!

Giani shakes his head and just ignores the curious Holly.  He slowly takes the microphone away from Holly who bounces excitedly as she waits for Giani to explain.  Much to her dismay, he doesn’t.

Giani:  I got no real beef with Sean.  He’s been disrespectful to the troops that defend our right to do what we do.  That’s pretty shitty, and I will make sure to kick his ass good for that.  But on a personal level, he’s not on my radar.  I could care less about all the hype that comes along with his name.  He should be just as worried about me, if not more so.  Cause I’ve done somethin’ he hasn’t done, and will never do!  I’ve been the SCW Heavyweight Champion. I beat the best of the best to carry that title.  All he does is runs his mouth, tryin’ to piss people off.  He’s like a less hot version of the Mean Girls, with a win-loss record that’s even less “hot”.  I’m a boss, and that’s all ya need to know.

Holly:  But… I’ve got more questions!  Have you ever thought about joining a support group for lingerers?  I might be small, but I can support a lot of weight…

Despite Holly’s pleading, Giani walks off after handing the microphone back to Holly.  She goes to plead more, but finds herself trapped on Giani’s bouncing backside.  It hypnotizes her as she signals the trinity, praying for the sins going on in her mind.

Camerman:  So… you never signaled for me to record, so…

Holly’s jaw drops open in shock and anger as she moves toward the cameraman, hands extended for maximum slapping action.  Fortunately, the Fuhgeddaboudit promotional camera crew caught this tasty tidbit for your enjoyment.  Holly… we got you…

{Scene Fades}

{Everyday I’m Shuff-ff-fflin’}

{fin}