Tom: You’ve gotta be kidding me! Another f*cking tag team match?
Tom Dudely slams a piece of paper onto the table in front of his protégé Wyatt Peterson. Wyatt sets his beer bottle next to it.
Tom: When the hell are they gonna give you a chance to prove what you can do? They keep sticking you in these tag matches as a filler.
Wyatt leans down toward the paper to read what it says.
Wyatt: It’s not so bad. At least ah’m in the main event.
Tom: Yeah, with 3 other guys that are going to overshadow you. Your partners, Spike and Jordan, are making their SCW debuts. On the other side, you’ve got the #1 contender to the SCW Heavyweight Championship,
Wyatt: What about the other two guys?
Tom rubs the back of his neck.
Tom: Well, I don’t really know anything about Kain.
Wyatt: Didn’t he used tah wear a mask?
Tom (laughs): No, that’s a different Kain.
Wyatt rubs his chin.
Wyatt: Is he the one who killed his brother?
Tom (laughs again): No, this is a Kain that I have no previous knowledge of. I did hear that he’s got a pretty impressive resume though. A former champion and stuff. Then there’s also Casey Williams, but you already know about him. You’ve been in the ring with him a couple of times. He’s a big guy. He’s probably the only wrestler in the company with more power than you.
Wyatt: Ah’ve still got a bone tah pick with him. Ah still haven’t gotten mah revenge for losing mah first match tah him and that other guy. What was his name?
Tom shrugs.
Wyatt: Don’t matter anyway. He ain’t around no more. Ah just hope ah can get a one on one with him someday.
Tom: I’m sure you will. Mark and Christian know that you two would be too big of a draw to keep apart.
Wyatt takes a swig from his beer and sets it back on the table.
Wyatt: Ah think that things are goin’ perdy good here in SCW.
Tom (nods): I agree.
Wyatt: That’s why ah’m thinkin’ ‘bout getting’ an apartment here in Las Vegas. Ah think ah might be stickin’ around a while. Only problem ah see is ah’d have tah find a roommate. Ah can’t afford a place on mah own on mah salary.
Tom: Well, I’m sure you could find someone on Craigslist. That’s where most people go to look for roommates, among other things.
Wyatt: Alright. Where’s that?
Tom laughs and shakes his head.
Tom: You still surprise me with some of the stuff that you don’t know. I always forget that you grew up Amish.
Wyatt: Ah ain’t Amish. Ah ain’t got a beard.
Tom just smiles.
Tom: Craigslist is on the internet. Let’s head to the library and I’ll help you find someone.
Tom grabs his hooded sweatshirt and pulls in on over his head as Wyatt puts on his jean jacket. Tom looks at Wyatt and shakes his head.
Tom: I don’t think anyone’s worn a jean jacket since 1990. Maybe we should update your wardrobe a little while we’re out.
Wyatt looks down at his jacket as Tom turns and walks out of the room.
Wyatt: But, ah like this jacket.
Wyatt follows after Tom as the scene fades.
***THE NEXT DAY***
The scene opens inside of a bar somewhere on the outskirts of Las Vegas. One of the tables along the back wall has been taken over by Wyatt Peterson and Tom Dudely. On the table is a handwritten sign that says “ROOMMATE INTERVIEWS”. There is a bottle of beer in front of each Tom and Wyatt. Wyatt’s Stetson hat is sitting on the table next to Wyatt’s beer. Tom has a notepad and a pen in front of him.
Wyatt: This was a great idea. There were a lot of replies to mah ad for a roommate. This way ah can get a feel for each of them.
Tom: The first one should be here any second. I’ll let you get to know them. I’ll just take notes for you.
Wyatt nods as someone walks up to the table. This… man… is about 5’2 and extremely thin. His skin is pale and his face is covered in acne. The only thing working for him is that his large glasses cover up most of his acne. His button down shirt is tucked into his pants which are hiked up to reveal his socks. He’s what you would probably describe as a nerd. Wyatt and Tom stand up to greet him. They both shake his hand.
Wyatt: Howdy. Ah’m Wyatt, this here’s Tom. You must be Eugene?
Eugene: Oh my God!
Eugene is flush with excitement.
Eugene: You guys are wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling, aren’t you?
Wyatt: Well, ah’m a wrassler, Tom’s mah manager.
Eugene: I went to the first show that Sin City Wrestling put on at Star of the Desert Arena. You were in a tag team match with some guy against a team called Poisoned Power. Your partner turned on you. He hit you in the balls and you lost the match.
Wyatt (nodding): Yeah, ah remember that one. Ah got some revenge on mah pardner for that night, but ah still wanna get mah hands on that big oaf Casey Williams who was on the other team.
Tom: You might get your chance next week.
Wyatt (smiles): Ah sure hope so. Ah can’t wait for that match.
Eugene: You’ve got another show? Where at?
Wyatt: It’s over in San Diego.
Eugene: Oh…
A look of disappointment spreads across Eugene’s face.
Wyatt: You can come with us if ya want.
Tom is blindsided by the invitation. He looks at Wyatt with a look of shock as Eugene’s excitement level increases.
Eugene: Really?!? That would be awesome.
Wyatt: Sure! Why the hell not? It’s not a big deal, right Tom?
Tom opens his mouth as if to dispute it but instead just lets out a very audible sigh.
Tom: I guess…
Wyatt: Great. How about ya sit down so we can talk about this apartment thing?
Eugene: Okey Dokey!
Eugene pulls out a chair and sits down in it. He scoots in close to the table and folds his hand together on top of it.
Wyatt: Ah guess ah should start with what I’m looking for. Ah do a lot of travelin’ an’ ah just need a place of mah own when ah’m in town. Ah can afford about five hundred dollars a month, give or take. As far as a roommate, ah need someone who will split everything fifty-fifty and is willing to have a good time when ah’m home.
Eugene: That sounds great. I love having fun. I host a game of Dungeons and Dragons every Friday night. We currently play in my mom’s basement, but it wouldn’t be too hard to move it to a new location.
Tom: Dungeons and Dragons? Really?
Tom laughs as he scribbles on the notepad.
Wyatt: Ah don’t know nothin’ ‘bout no Dungeons and Dragons, but ah like to enjoy a few cold ones when ah’m home. Maybe have a few ladies over. Ya know what ah mean, Eugene?
Eugene: You mean, like, have a party?
Wyatt nods and Eugene starts shaking his head.
Eugene: Oh no, no, no, no, no, no. no, no.
Wyatt: Was that a motorboat?
Tom starts laughing.
Eugene: I’m not good with girls. They intimidate me.
Wyatt: How the hell do they intimidate ya? All they do is walk up to ya, buy ya a drink, and come home with ya.
Tom: Umm, Wyatt?
Wyatt turns to look at Tom.
Tom: That’s not how it normally works. For nerds… I mean… normal guys, like Eugene, it’s usually the other way around and usually it doesn’t end with the girl going home with them.
Wyatt: Ah’ve never had that problem.
Tom looks at his watch.
Tom: We’ve gotta wrap this up. The next applicant is going to be here any second.
Wyatt: Well, ah don’t think ah have any more questions for ya. Ah’ve got your number. Ah’ll call ya.
Wyatt, Tom and Eugene all stand up and shake hands.
Eugene: I can’t wait.
Eugene walks out of the bar as Tom and Wyatt sit back down at the table..
Tom: I can’t believe you offered to let him go with us to San Diego.
Wyatt: Why not? He seems like a perdy cool guy.
Tom: Cool? Are you kidding? That guy made Stephen Hawking look like John Wayne.
Wyatt: Ah don’t know who Stephen Hawkin’ is, but ah’m gonna assume that’s not a good thing.
Tom: It is for Stephen Hawking.
At this time, an attractive redhead walks up to the table.
Woman: I’m looking for Wyatt.
The boys stand back up quickly.
Wyatt: Yes ma’am. Ah’m Wyatt. This here’s Tom. Are you Savanna?
Savanna: I am.
Wyatt gives her a once over from head to toe. He lets out a whistle.
Tom: We should probably get this started.
Wyatt snaps out of his daze.
Wyatt: Oh, yes. Umm… do ya wanna go grab a bite to eat? We can talk about when ya wanna move in together.
Tom: Wyatt, what about the other applicants?
Savanna: Sure.
Wyatt: Where do ya wanna go?
Savanna: I’m really craving a steak.
Wyatt (smiling): A woman after mah own heart. Ah know a great steakhouse down the street. Let’s go.
Wyatt puts on his jacket and Stetson hat.
Wyatt: Tom, can ya please cancel the rest of the interviews. Ah’ve found mah new roommate.
Tom: I’m not your assistant.
Wyatt: Come on, Tom. Pleeeeeease.
Tom looks at Savanna and then back at Wyatt.
Tom: Alright, but you owe me. Next time, you’re my wingman.
Wyatt gets excited.
Wyatt: Thanks, Tom. Ah appreciate it.
Wyatt walks around the table and grabs Savanna around the waist and pulls her close to him.
Wyatt: Let’s go.
Wyatt and Savanna starts walking toward the door.
Tom (calling after Wyatt): Don’t forget that we’re leaving for San Diego on Wednesday. I’d better see you by then.
Wyatt turns his head back towards Tom.
Wyatt: Don’t count on it.
Wyatt throws his head back in laughter. Tom chuckles a little as he shakes his head.
Tom (talking to himself): That boy is a pain in the ass sometimes. He needs to start thinking with the head on his shoulders, not the one below the belt.
Tom downs the last bit of his beer. He grabs the notepad and walks out of the bar. Just before the scene fades, another man walks up to the table that Tom and Wyatt had been at. The man looks around confused.
Man: Did I miss the interview?
The scene fades.
