THIS IS MY TIME TO BECOME ROULETTE CHAMPION
Narrator: After the official Card for Climax Climax control 386 was announced I spoke with Bea Barnhart and I’m telling you that Bea is confident she will easily earn the Roulette Championship against Bobbie Dahl. Bea also had some choice words for Bobbie Dahl but I will let Bea present her comments to you rather than having me step on her comments. With that said I turn you over to Bea Barnhart who is in Long Beach, California, for Climax Control 386.
When the scene opens we see Bea and Bill Barnhart at The Stand Up Comedy Club in Long Beach, California. We see a sign that says that their friend and neighbor in Lawrenceville, Georgia, Andrew, is doing a short stand-up comedy routine so they came to see him perform some new material.
Bea: When Andrew called to let us know he was coming to Long Beach to perform at a Comedy Club I was so happy. Andrew told us he placed Iris in boarding at Camp Bow Wow in Lawrenceville, Georgia, so she will be fine until Andrew returns to Lawrenceville.
Bill: Andrew told me he is trying out some new material to see how this crowd reacts in areas outside of the State of Georgia. Depending on their reaction to his material he said he will either continue to use it for a time or change out the material to be more interesting and amusing for the different audiences. He said he asked to be the opening act as he has a short presentation and then he needs to catch a flight back to Atlanta to return home to Lawrenceville.
The Emcee for this stand-up comedy event steps to the mic and introduces Andrew.
Emcee: Our first stand-up comedian for tonight comes from Lawrenceville, Georgia. He asked to be the opening act as he is presenting some of his new material to see what reactions he gets, so his time at the mic will be short. Please give him feedback during his presentation and please give a rousing welcome for Andrew Eide!!!
The crowd applauds and cheers as Andrew steps up to the mic and we can only hope that his material will be enough laughs so that Andrew will continue to include some of his new material in his future stand-up comedy routines.
Andrew: There are some songs where people thought the lyrics said a certain thing and then they found out the real lyrics were something else. One example is the Rolling Stones song ANGIE. My friend told me he always thought the lyrics said IN JAIL. . .IN JAIL...then twenty years later he found out the lyrics said ANGIE. . .ANGIE.
Audience light laughter.
Andrew: In the Queen song Bohemian Rhapsody the true lyrics are “Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me” and my friend told me he always thought the lyrics were “Beelzebub is the Devil’s disciple” and I am going HUH! Because I knew what the real lyrics were.
Audience moderate laughter.
Andrew: They say that Owls are extremely smart. If that’s the case why are they always going WHO? WHO? WHO?
Audience moderate laughter.
Andrew: My closing item is one of those cross the road items. So why did the Cow cross the road?
The audience yells out WE DON’T KNOW! WHY DID THE COW CROSS THE ROAD?
Andrew: To get to the Udder side!!!
The audience bursts out in loud laughter. Andrew ends his stand-up comedy routine by thanking the audience then he steps off the stage to join Bea and Bill at their table.
Bea: Nice new material Andrew. I like that you jumped to different topics and with items that make the audience members think.
Bill: Nice work Andrew. Are you staying for Climax Control 386 where Bea is wrestling Bobbie Dahl for the Roulette Championship?
Andrew: Sorry I can’t stay as I have a stand-up comedy assignment to do in Lawrenceville, Georgia, so I have to return to Lawrenceville this evening. I also have Iris in boarding at Camp Bow Wow and I want to bring her home where she is more comfortable. Thanks for coming to see me run some new material to the audience. From the reactions I got from the new material I may include some of it in my upcoming stand-up comedy routines.
Andrew stands up and excuses himself so he can catch his flight back to Atlanta, Georgia. Bill and Bea again thank Andew for inviting them to the stand-up comedy club to see him present his new information.
Bea and Bill look into the camera and they inform the viewers they will return to their hotel room and that Bea will continue her comments leading up to her Roulette Championship match against Bobbie Dahl at Climax Control 386 from their hotel room. The Network puts up a notification that they will return shortly to continue with Bea’s comments concerning her upcoming match at Climax Control 386. The Network then cuts back to regularly scheduled programming for this time slot.
AFTER A SHORT TIME THE NETWORK RETURNS TO BROADCASTING BEA AND BILL AT THEIR HOTEL ROOM IN LONG BEACH WHERE BEA CONTINUES HER COMMENTS CONCERNING HER UPCOMING ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH.
The camera shot shows Bea and Bill sitting next to each other in comfortable chairs. The camera person lets them know they are again live broadcasting.
Bea: I would like to welcome everyone back as we are again live broadcasting. This time we are in our hotel room in Long Beach, California. Do you want to know something Bill?
Bill: Sure. But I want you to know that I’m on camera with you to provide support for your Roulette Championship match at Climax Control 386 against Bobbie Dahl. It is your match so I would like to keep my comments to myself if that is okay with you. That is, of course, unless you ask me a direct question and want a response from me.
Bea: Actually I would like you comment on what I’m about to say. You remember Andrew’s comedy routine where he uses the joke WHY DID THE COW CROSS THE ROAD? TO GET TO THE UDDER SIDE right?
Bill: Of course I remember that joke from Andrew.
Bea: Well I have one for Bobbie Dahl.
Bill: I may regret this but please present your item for Bobbie Dahl.
Bea: WHY DID BOBBIE DAHL CROSS THE ROAD? BECAUSE I PICKED HER FAT ASS UP WITH A FORKLIFT, DROVE HER TO THE OTHER SIDE, AND DUMPED HER ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROAD!
Bill: Oh, my! I wasn’t expecting that one Bea! Just be careful as Bobbie Dahl is 110 pounds heavier than you. Bobbie could trip over her boot laces and fall on top of you and you might get hurt.
Bea: I don’t give a damn how much taller or heavier any of my opponents are. Nothing will stop me from earning the Roulette Championship this time!
Bill: Nice for you to be confident. Now if you will please excuse me I will sit off to the side as this camera time is for you to present your comments for your Bombshell Roulette Championship match against Bobbie Dahl.
Bill stands up and moves to the side where the camera cannot get a shot of Bea and him at the same time so that Bea is the focus of the presentation.
STATISTICS
Bea: Well, Bobbie, it won’t be much longer when the two of us step into the ring with you as the defending Bombshell Roulette Champion and me as the challenger for the Bombshell Roulette Championship. You defeated Alexandra Callaway for the Roulette Championship. So with that said let me tell you my win-loss record against Alexandra Callaway. I am 2-1 against Alexandra Callaway. You also recently defended the Bombshell Roulette Championship against Harper Mason. Want to know what my win-loss record is against Harper Mason? I am 1-0 against Harper. I admit that way way way back in May 2020, I had a match against you and I lost that match by pinfall. Also I was new to being a wrestler and our match in 2020 was only my ninth match as a wrestler. A hell of a lot has changed since then. I wouldn’t be opposite you in this match as the challenger for the Bombshell Roulette Championship if I didn’t earn my shot. If you think I am going to waste this opportunity then it proves you are not thinking clearly. I am walking into our match as the challenger and I am walking away from our match as the newly crowned Sin City Wrestling Bombshell Roulette Champion.
Bea pauses her comments to ask Bill if he wishes to add to her comments and Bill informs Bea that he will not comment at this time Bea is free to continue with her comments.
THE BOTTOM LINE AND THE ONLY VALID OPTION FOR THE OUTCOME OF THE MATCH
Bea: Bobbie I want you to listen intently and pay attention to what I’m saying. I know. . .I know. . .you focus on the dinner bell instead of other things as your weight proves that conclusion. You may think you will be able to waddle your fat ass into our match and easily dispose of me and walk away as still the Bombshell Roulette Champion. Well, Bobbie, what you think doesn’t mean a damn thing to me as I’m the one who is going to easily dispose of you and I will walk away as the newly crowned Bombshell Roulette Champion.
Bea flashes a smile.
Bea: Bobbie you may be heavier than me but you do not have an advantage over me simply because you are obese. You are also one inch shorter than I am. The downside, for you anyway, is that with you carrying 110 pounds more weight than me you will get tired, exhausted, and worn down, quickly because you have to use most your energy to lug your fat ass around the ring. Knowing how people with your condition are maybe all that is needed to get the win over you is to have one of the fans toss a Snickers Bar into the ring and you will knock yourself out diving on top of the Snickers Bar for a quick snack. HA HA HA!!!
Bea takes a bit of time to recover from her laughing over her comment about Bobbie Dahl diving onto a Snickers Bar.
Bea: Let me put this straight up to you. . .of course by using simple phrases and terms so that you will understand what I’m saying. . .because you need to be well informed of where you stand when facing me. I will try not to talk too fast so that you will be able to understand what I’m saying. I am quicker than you in the ring. I will run rings around you since you have to lug around extra weight and I don’t have that weight problem. I have a 130 IQ which puts me in the Genius category which means I can out-think you as fast as the speed of light. I have many maneuvers and holds that result in opponents submitting to me. Oh how I enjoy an opponent getting locked in one of my submission holds and listening to them beg me to release the hold, and begging the Referee to make me release the hold, and listening to the Referee tell opponent that I’m not doing anything illegal or against the rules.
Bea chuckles.
Bea: Trust me on this one Bobbie. You are not able to intimidate and scare me. However I’ve heard people talking that when you walk into an All-You-Can-Eat Buffet the owners of the Buffet are intimidated because they know they will go bankrupt after you finish eating. Har har har!!! Try to intimidate me Bobbie! I dare you to try! Let me give you a Tagalog phrase to let you know what I honestly think of you. That phrase is IKAW AY ISANG MATABANG BABOY and the literal translation is YOU ARE A FAT PIG and if you take offense to that then try to shut me up. Good luck trying to shut me up Bobbie.
Bea lets out an sinister laugh.
Bea: Bobbie people have asked me questions about how I feel being in various wrestling matches and I have always given them my honest responses. Here are a few of those questions and my responses to them. I am often asked if I feel bad having a 130 Genius level IQ while facing opponents who have an IQ level lower than a pile of dog shit. My response? Nah! I don’t feel bad being more intelligent than my opponents. I am often asked if I feel good when forcing an opponent to submit for my win in the match? Absolutely! Positively! Without a doubt! I feel fantastic when I have an opponent locked into a submission hold and they whine, cry, scream out from the pain, and beg the Referee to stop the match! Recently I’ve been having everyone ask me if I honestly believe I will defeat you to become the next Sin City Wrestling Bombshell Roulette Champion and my response is a resounding HELL YEAH I WILL DEFEAT BOBBIE DAHL AND BECOME THE NEXT BOMBSHELL ROULETTE CHAMPION!!!
Bea gives a sad look into the camera before flashing a huge smile into the camera.
Bea: I’m sorry, Bobbi, that I verbally slam dunked you. . .verbally humiliate you. . .and verbally reveal the truth about how pathetic you are. Then again someone had to do it so I took the opportunity and verbally slam dunked you. You were warned by many people that I’m not someone you should take lightly but of course you failed to listen to the warnings. What happens to you in our match will be because you failed to listen to me and everyone else.
Bea informs the camera person she will make her final comments and when she is done they can cut their camera feed.
Bea: Bobbie you think you are a mean girl but you don’t know what a mean girl is. I defeated a gang of mean girls from my High School and College in the Philippines and I walked away without a scratch but all the mean girls left the scene as damaged goods. After me and Bill moved to Lawrenceville, Georgia, I was shopping in Sugarloaf Mills Mall in Lawrenceville. A gang of around 6 to 8 mean girls got themselves into their mean sarcastic mode. I tried to ignore them but they started pushing and shoving me and demanding a fight. I told them I don’t feel like fighting 6 to 8 of them at the same time but I would love to fight them one at a time. Those mean girls at the mall didn’t like that suggestion, as they prefer to work together as a pack, so they rushed me. Guess what happened Georgie? I whupped all their asses and left them on the floor of the mall with bruises, cuts, and broken bones. Those mean girls tried to convince Mall Security and Gwinnett County Police that I started the fight but the security camera footage proved they started the fight and they were arrested. Me? I left Sugarloaf Mills Mall and went free of charges as I was in self-defense mode.
Bea roars with laughter.
Bea: When the Roulette Wheel gets the spin for our match I honestly don’t care where the wheel lands. There isn’t a stipulation or rules on the Roulette Wheel that intimidates me. Whether the Roulette Wheel stops on a spot that states the match is with brutal weapons. . .or a street fight. . .or a bar room brawl. . .or all of the items listed on the Roulette Wheel combined. . .or absolutely no rules or disqualifications. . .I will still win our match as I adapt to the type of match and I will win. Bobbie please have a nice time leading up to our match because the instant the bell rings to start our match you are doomed!
After Bea delivers her final comments she turns to look at Bill who is giving Bea two thumbs up as his approval rating for Bea’s comments concerning her upcoming match. Bea returns her look into the camera and after a short time the Network cuts the camera feed and our scree goes dark.
