The sounds of Christmas music can be heard coming from the brightest corner of the apartment of one Kandy Kaine. The tree is decked out in candy canes and candy cane lights exclusively. Every flavor of candy cane is hanging on the tree as Kandy works on adding more.
Kandy: No, no… Tess was wrong. There’s room for more candy on this tree…
Kandy looks down to all of the empty boxes of candy canes, and there are at least two dozen. She reaches into a bag next to the tree to pull out two more boxes. Across from the tree is a fireplace, and two comfortable recliners. Matty Mallow is sitting on one, with the ukulele on his shoulder, playing along to the music. He’s quite skilled, surprisingly.
Matty: So, you see, the people on the plane were probably just upset because you weren’t playing it right. It’s all about the flick of the wrist.
Kandy: Nooooo… Tessa said it was probably my voice. She said something about school. Nails on a chalkboard or something?
Matty grimaces and then shrugs his shoulders.
Matty: That doesn’t sound right. What does school hafta do with anything?
Kandy nods her head as she works on finding empty branches to hang new canes on.
Kandy: I think it was something to do with the fact that people weren’t ready for the wonderful magic that comes this time of year. They think you have to wait for December to enjoy it, but noooooope! I’d say not. I start in January.
Matty goes to speak, but then stops. He ceases playing and purses his lips. He begins to count on his fingers.
Matty: But wait, if you start in January, when do you end?
Kandy throws the box of canes into the air so that they fall down all around her as she squeals.
Kandy: NEVERRRR!!!
Matty nods his head. Afterall, this does make sense. Kandy strategically places canes as she talks.
Kandy: You know, you could have more fun finding empty branches for me than playing the ookuele. There’s so many, and I can’t seem to find them all fast enough.
There is a sound of the tree straining, a slow whining from them, begging for mercy. Kandy continues to place them.
Kandy: I mean, it could be romantic.
Matty: What are you talking about? We’re BFF’s.
Kandy: Yeah, like Bobbie and Artie were? I could walk around telling everyone you’re gay.
Matty: I’m not gay. I’m asexual.
Matty says this very pointedly. He sets the ukulele down in the chair and walks over to help Kandy, begrudgingly.
Matty: Besides, her love life is the last thing you should be worrying about. She’s going to squash you.
Kandy: Hey! No big jokes.
Matty stops and purses his lips again.
Matty: I didn’t mean to. I just meant that you’ve skipped out on the gym four days this week.
Kandy: Yeahhhh… It wasn’t the best idea with a match coming up, but I couldn’t get here last week, so I was kinda turkey-lagged from Thanksgiving all this week. But I just know I’m going to have a good match with Bobbie. I’ll train tomorrow, and I trained today, so she’ll still get me at my best.
Matty: You know you’re going to get worked extra hard tomorrow, so you can make Staggs Dungeon proud. We both have undefeated streaks to maintain. Two and oh for both of us.
Kandy places one last cane on the tree, smiling.
Kandy: You’re right about that. Bobbie deserves better than a turkey stuffed turkey, and she’s going to get it. I know she’s ready, because she never disappoints.
Matty: Except when she makes a heel turn. That didn’t work out super well, though. She’s too nice.
Kandy: Unlike me, the only Mean Girl on the roster. You can be mean and positive at the same time, just like this… Bobbie, that shirt doesn’t match your attitude, because it’s not a bright enough color. Get it? Because she’s got a bright personality. Or… Hey Bobbie, have you seen yourself in the mirror lately? I mean, your only flaw is being perfect the way that you are.
Matty: Daaaaaaaaaaag suuuuuuuun! That sounded just like Delia Darling, except American… and nothing like her at all, nevermind…
Kandy: Hashtag, Mean Girls. I’m too good at this. One day, I might be the biggest heel in the company, and I’ll show Bobbie how it’s really done. But that won’t be the case on Sunday. We’ll be two fan favorites, duking it out to see who the better wrestler is. I have a good idea that she will give me everything that she’s got, and I know that she’s ready for everything I’ve got.
Matty: Hey, what happened to the Mean Girl?
Kandy stops to think about it for a second. She hums as the wheels continue to turn. Her face suddenly lights up as she snaps her fingers.
Kandy: Oh, yeah… Bobbie… You know what? I’m going to go out there on Sunday, and I’m going to Bodyslam you because I’m strong enough to do it, and you’re going to get up and throw me into the corner and do a Body Avalanche because you can. Once I’m done holding my stomach, I’m going to duck a Clothesline and do a… a… a Monkey Flip! And when you kick out from the pin, I’m going to take that clothesline you tried earlier. Then we’re going to keep wrestling until one of us wins… What do you think of that trash talk?
Matty’s face looks completely blank as he stares at Kandy. He hangs onto the look for a full minute before his face lights up.
Matty: Genius! You’re really good at that. I’m gonna hafta learn from the Mean Girl Guru.
Kandy: It’s definitely an acquired skill. I’m going to wrap this up like a Christmas present. Bobbie, we’re going to put on a match that no one will expect to be a Match of the Night candidate. I know you’re capable of it, and so I hope you know I am too. We’ve both got something to prove to the fans, to the bookers, to the higher ups. And we’re going to do that win, lose, or draw. Just promise me that you’re going to give me your bessss…
Kandy is unable to finish her sentence when the tree branches snap under the weight of the candy canes and all of it tumbles to the ground. Kandy just watches with a stunned look on her face. She looks over slightly to Matty, who is just as shocked as her. She sighs and begins picking the branches up. Matty helps her as the camera fades out.
