[Dmitri]

 The beginning? Or the end…. Or perhaps the beginning of the end…, or the end that what has begun so many years ago??? You tell me…..

Dmitri: Why is it that you won’t leave me alone??

A thought that has pondered me for how long? I really wish I could forget, but I just seem to be unable to do so. Either by my own greed, or the fact that others just wish to see me humiliated all over again, to mock me and make fun of me. Or it is perhaps the pure own egotistical wishes of the one that exceeds the other…. But it doesn’t matter does it?? you have set your sights set upon me like a vulture pries away with his ugly stinking head, looking down upon a victim that is too weak to run and too exhausted to even care. Those bastards of birds should have been long extinct, but just like YOU… they are not.

Dmitri: I just want to hide, run away and never come back!! Why do you torment me that much??

Am I expecting an answer? Am I expecting an apology if it was all a mistake?? Of course not, that’s not how things work in this world. You are either molded into that what they wish to contain you in, or you will become merely a moment of fun like in the arena’s of the Gladiators. Stabbing their swords into your flesh before waiting for that inevitable thumb that would be lowered for the other man’s demise. Such a sickening thought and nothing that you could do to stop it or make a change. It’s always death on demand, back then you picked your favorite fighter and hoped he would extend his existence for another day. While in our current insanity you just click a button, select your victim and watch that person suffer beyond belief while sitting at home and drinking some glass of wine. It makes me sick.

Dmitri: I hate you….

Isn’t hatred a beautiful word? Just four letters that unites as the word that is perfectly assigned to spew out your dislike for whatever or whomever it is that displeases you. To the mere level of how it would turn your stomach upside down and explode like a cancer. I’m so very close to that moment that I just don’t care anymore whatever it is that is destined to happen to me. Because history has been written and the future is just a sand drop away of making me relive every single fucking dislike that made me hurl at you.

Dmitri: I love you….

Oh how contradicted I am huh?? Well I despise it too, I hate myself for every ounce of my integrity that has been washed away with my very own shame, my rage, my sickness that I cannot contain and yet I love you. Oh no, not like the way I love the woman I want to spent my eternity with as well as my children. But it is as deep buried in my gut that I just cannot run away from. Because we are destined to cross our paths how many times YOU WANT. Because the desire for my needs for you has never been satisfied by you hasn’t it?? Well eventually THEY WILL!!

Oh who am I kidding….

Dmitri: I hate you….

I grin, the classical love hate relationship. No matter who you have sold your golden soul to, you ever seen to care who clutches his paws across your leather streap. Oh yeah, I’m talking     about you championship gold. You were just a slut that I wanted so bad, but was always out of my reach. You are nothing more to me but a itch that needs to be scratched, but every time that I reach out to that one spot it changes over to the next. NO matter who wears that gold around it’s waist, it was YOUR opportunity to laugh at my futile and pathetic reign that I don’t even consider worth to be mentioned. And why would I?? Every other champion does, so I could just suffer from memory loss and still remember that shameful moment that I thought I had it all…. Only to have it being ripped out of my fingers and watch my blood flow to this very single fucking day……., but does this mean I am desperate??
How can you not be? How can you not see your essence of your entire existence fluctuate before your eyes every single time that you breathe?? Every time that you come this close…, only to replaced by someone else. Someone better, someone that apparently is hungrier than I am….

Dmitri: But…., how???

Is this truly the question that I need to ask myself over and over and over again? Or is it merely the repetitive notion that is stuck inside my brain and only the names will be changed to protect the innocent?? Then who is protecting me? I wonder? Is it my beautiful supportive partner?? Whose tears she sheds breaks me down every single day as she knows…. SHE FUCKING KNOWS THAT I AM A LOSER!!! And yet she never leaves my side, it must be something worth to be called an opportunist?? Even for once?? Right?? Or is this merely just another example of how delusional I am starting to become…. I don’t know any more and more importantly I don’t care. I am hungry, I am thirsty and yet I do not know any more for what….. I will just wait in my mentally unstable cage, as an endangered animal that is being used in a circus. That has lost his wilderness, that has lost his desire to hunt and watches his life passing him by. Waiting to be shot if he does not care any more and launches at your throat. Merely for that one single tip of blood that I needed to devour… to taste one more time… before I die in shame. Knowing that I will never stare into the dead eyes of my ancestors… no more being allowed to be a king of the jungle. I have put you to shame dear Damia…. I just don’t know any more how to get out of it…. unless I perish…

Dmitri: At least then I would be safe from your tormented soul….

A lapse back in memory lane….

Somewhere in January 2018, the exact date is lost somewhere as SCW has closed it’s doors. No longer the great federation that kept people at their seats. It’s dead, the wrestlers have scattered all over the world and the memories have just become a distant emotion in the hearts of the die hard fans. Those who were there when it was just another Indy show, another example of big minds trying to be different than the others…. And yet not having a single clue how to succeed. And yet they did….

Back to that day, Dmitri is a happy man. He had experienced a miracle, a first ever vampire birth to this world…. Real life vampires coming from the womb of the woman he loves. Their creation, something that was thought to be a myth and a fairy tale. And yet there they are, both still not believing what just happened. He is watching Damia holding their three born children, two boys and a girl. Something that he knew that has changed their lives forever.

Dmitri: Why can’t I be with them???

His voice is raspy, he has not drank or eaten in obviously a long time. He has not taken his eyes off of them since the birth had taken place.

Voice: Vampire procedure of the ancient world Dmitri.

He looks over his shoulder to a small man, one of the members of the council, one that he has seen often and yet never spoke. One that was the youngest of the council, ironic is that the youngest was still 500 years older than Dmitri himself. He is wearing a black three piece suit and a light green blouse and a matching tie. Dmitri stares at his face, a face that you would have thought that only could have existed in Nazi Germany. A gestapo type look he had, yet Dmitri knew that this man is far from being a sadistic creature that could do unthinkable things to get information out of others. Yet he knew that he was capable off doing so if he wanted to.

Dmitri: How long must I stay here??? Those are my children too!!!!

The words come out of his mouth with a large sum of difficulty, the gasping for oxygen is quite visible as well as the red bloodshed eyes that are nearly popping out of his skull and his normally pale white skin has turned into filthy yellow.

Voice: You should drink Dmitri, there are several people that work here that would love to dona…..

Dmitri: I don’t need no…

He cuts off his sentence as slime drips from his mouth, it’s not slime it’s not blood. It’s liquid that he didn’t knew it existed. Causing him to buckle to his knees and the bloodshed in his eyes are getting clearer by the second. His disgusting yellow skin reveals it… but only the man knows

Voice: I told you Dmitri, I can still….

Dmitri: WHAT’S WRONG!!

He stares at his hands, he sees that the blue vessels in the palm of his hands are slowly turning black as the night. He cannot feel the blood pump any faster than once in a few minutes. Now the realization is setting in on his mind, he has been committing.

Voice: Suicide?? Oh you can call it that way Dmitri, but that’s human talk. We vampires do not have it in our genes to do such a heinous attack on our existence.

Dmitri: THEN WH…..,

He cannot finish the sentence as he is once again coughing up the slime. This time the most dreaded thing that he had feared is coming true, the scared eyes of Damia has vanished from her younglings and towards his direction. Looking on in complete and utter shock, shock of horror as if you are watching reruns of the most disgusting scenes imaginable…. But even the scenes of master minds as Dario Argento could not prepare her from what she was seeing at that moment.
Damia: D…. D…. Dmitri??

She wants to flee her bed, but she is too weak. The internal blood loss that she endured because of her triplets feeding upon her back in her womb. The immense quickness of time that it had taken her newborn to grow into the age what humans would take nine months to achieve. It was merely weeks and she had lost so much blood, feeling ashamed that she had taken so much blood from Dmitri. As that was the only way to make through the birth of their children.

Voice: He will be alright Damia….

The voice echoes through her brain, knowing that it is a vampire of the council. No other vampire she knew had the powers that she and Dmitri possessed except them.

Damia: If something would happen to him… I…

Voice: I need him to feed Damia… that’s the only way to rescue him from his suffering.

She once again feels ashamed, she knew that she did not wanted him to leave her side. Feeling selfish, feeling like she was killing him. But back then she did not realize it, she could not think anything else but to feed upon his blood. Knowing that this is what would make their children as strong as they are right now when they would turn to the right age…

Voice: They will only surpass you Damia.

The voice echoes through her brain, confused as her emotions are mixed between pride of knowing their kin will surpass their abilities… and yet what did it cost them?? Perhaps Dmitri’s life as he willingly offered himself to her, out of love, out of unselfishness. And all because she was selfish and needy, she never knew a sacrifice as huge as this. And now she wants to help him, but can’t. As she in her own way is too weakened…. As her children are feeding upon her arms as their small teeth are locked upon tubes that are stuck in her arms as their greedy bodies are sucking in every last drop. She will have enough blood to stay alive as the council monitors every single blood infusion from her body. Her eyes are deadlocked upon the weakened state of Dmitri, the man she loves. Seeing how his hair are slowly turning thin and falling out of his head.

Damia: (whiper) Please Dmitri…, please feed.

The whispering are unable to be detected by human ears, but to Dmitri it has been the bell that is tolling to either take his life or being the dinner bell. His head slowly rises upwards, staring into the eyes of his partner as she sees the darkest of black eyes ever seen by her. Gasping out of shock as his skin is slowly letting go and his skull starts to become visible. With a last ditch of energy he let’s out a roar of animalistic nature before running out of the door and searching for a human donor to safe his life.

Damia: Is he going to….?

Voice: Kill?? No Damia, he won’t…. but he will be saved…, his life will be saved, but his dreams are still killing him.

She is letting out a tear from her left eye, the tear slowly dries up on his face as she is too weak to let it fully be a tear of blood that would slowly roll over her cheek and fall on top of the bed sheet.

Damia: Dmitr…., I love you.

The words are soft, yet for some reason she knows it brings her the insurance that he has heard it and will be ok. Causing her to close her eyes and focus back upon their children.

Damia: I know you will overcome this Dmitri…, you have to….

   February 12th 2018

My addiction

Dmitri: My name is Dmitri and I’m an addict.

People: Hello Dmitri….

The shot opens up with Dmitri attending his first ever AA meeting to talk about his addiction. Not about alcohol, not about drugs. His addiction is about failing every single time that he has competed in the ring for the world title… or has failed to defend it after finally obtaining it. He has been down since the day had come that the company had closed its doors and closed it forever. And the sad part of it all that he has not been able to let it go, to move on. To enjoy the time that he could spend with his children. Yet he had decided to hide in his room, not going outside. Seconds seemed eternally inside the darkness, whispering over and over again the word
Dmitri: (whisper) Why?? Why?? Why???

Dmitri snaps out of his day dream as he realizes that the man that is leading the AA meeting and is talking to the others that are all humans asDmitri joins halfway in.

Councelor: It’s great to have someone new in the group, Dmitri. Can you tell us something more about your addiction that you are suffering from?? Alcohol? Drugs?? Women?? Gambling???

Dmitri sighs, he knew he hated to come here but had to. He had promised Damia that he would go, even though he would hate himself for it. He looks at the others, all humans that do not see the possible threat that is among them to take their lives if he had wanted to. But he refuses to do so, realizing that it could have been so much easier. But he knows that it would only make it worse and he hates that feeling.

Dmitri:…. I….

Councelor: Yes??

Dmitri can hear him curse at himself for not having the courage to speak out in public, feeling the pressure building inside of him as he notices everyone is staring at him. Waiting for his answer, waiting for that one single thing that would make him look ridiculous in his own mind.

Dmitri: You wouldn’t understand…, I should better go.

Dmitri wants to stand up, but the promise he agreed not to break to his lover makes his body very heavy. Realizing that he had never lied to her, made him feel guilty beyond his imagination.

Councelor: Why don’t you just try me?? Let me be the judge whether I…

Dmtri: My addiction is finalizing my dream of becoming Sin City Wrestling’s next World Heavyweight Champion. Because I have failed my maker, my pride and joy and everyone that ever believed in me. Because I know they are ashamed of me!!!

He feels that familiar rage is brewing inside of him once more, the rage of unsuccessfully attempting to win the world title for many years… And now is confronted every single day that SCW is dead.

Councelor: Is this SCW a metaphor to your problem Dmitri? Please enlighten me…

Dmitri is biting on his lower lip, trying not to let the rage boil over to the outside over the question that was asked. Clearly the man does not know Sin City Wrestling and or his past. He let his eyes quickly pass every single person in the group before closing them and sighing once more.

Dmitri: Sin City Wrestling is…., or should I say was a wrestling company that I participated in for many years. Where I wanted to sink my teeth into the very best of competition that was out there…. Before challenging the very best that was out there….. and failed….

Councelor: Interesting and in what way did you fail Dmitri??

He looks up at him, his eyes are slowly changing to dark red. But the councelor is not looking at him directly, too busy writing down notes upon his clipboard as Dmitri decides to explain

Dmitri: I’m a wrestler, I participated in some of the cruelest of matches against a human being called J2H and…….. I lost.

Councelor: Well doesn’t everyone lose to someone else?? I mean isn’t that part of life Dmitri? Why would that have become such an addiction to you??

He groans, not believing his ears over the question that has been asked by this “human”. Yet he chooses to remain calm, how hard it must be for him under the circumstances as he is trying to explain.

Dmitri: The first time it was a distraction that caused me to fail, the second time I got ambushed and beaten down by some of his “Friends”… Then we had a final confrontation that you only could lose by beating down your opponent so badly that someone on the outside could not take it anymore and threw in the towel….

Counceler: So you lost?? You knew you would eventually get another chance??

His eyes are now fully blackened with rage, his fangs are starting to grow and become visible…. But he shakes his head at the final moment, moments before he would not care anymore and just launch at anyone in attendance. But he decides to remain calm and explain some more.

Dmitri: The stipulation was that if I would lose, I could not challenge for THAT BELT for as long as J2H was champion. Something that had taken out a year of my life before I finally saw him lose!!! Only to see him win it back again and had to suffer the tormention even longer.

Councelor: That’s rather unfortunate, but what…..

DmitrI: Unfortunate??? UNFORTUNATE!! Oh, I’m sorry. From what dimension are you coming from?? You don’t get it do you!! DO YOU!!?? No of course you don’t!! you fool!! You never had anyone decide your fate in the most horrible way EVER IMAGINABLE!! Oh no, you see I had to endure watching him compete against those who weren’t even destined to face him. But got the opportunities because there was nobody better to challenge him for that belt besides me. To watch him become an icon, become a legendary figure that broke many records and did it with such an arrogance…. That at first I believed it was their ego….

Councelor: It’s not?? Then what is???

Dmitri: It’s that championship belt….

The look on the face of the councelor suddenly changes after hearing that statement coming out of Dmitri’s mouth. Believing that he has allowed a joker to make fun of him and his group of people that have serious problems.

Councelor: I believe it is best for you to leave, there’s the do….

Dmitri suddenly jumps towards him and grabs him by the throat.

Dmitri: You are like all the others!! You don’t want to understand my anguish after starting to talk and you hear the first word and judge me!! You think I am saying something funny???

A gargle escapes the councelors mouth as his eyes suddenly turns into fear, trying to break the grip that Dmitri has on him. Only to realize quickly that Dmitri is much stronger than he appears to be.

Dmitri: No I’m not!!! I had to endure this punishment for over a year! Waiting for a new champion to emerge, while my brain and soul were telling me that I failed them, that I was a lowlife son of a bitch!! No, you don’t know as you only pretend to understand and write down some notes because it’s your stinking job!!!

Councelor: I….

The gargling sounds overshadows the attempts of the councelor to talk, trying to reason with the man that clearly cannot be reasoned with. Causing fear to emerge upon his eyes as they travel towards the others in the group, some already had ran off as others are sitting there frozen in mere fear. Dmitri pulls the face of the councelor closer towards him as he inhales his scent slowly.

Dmitri: And then after all this time, I finally got another opportunity and succeeded. Oh joy, oh hallelujah the curse should have been broken huh? But of course not. As I could not have even successfully defend the belt in my first title defense out there…. And I failed…,once again letting down the ones I love and allowed the critiques to come down upon me… especially  my own, especially that of my loved one, even though she never admits it… I can tell it from the many tears that she has shed. More than I could catch, more that I could ever make up to her and make her feel proud of me for a change.

But no, I had to watch others beat him also where I had failed, I had to endure others take the championship and I was once again sitting at home and contemplating on accepting facts before I got that opportunity once more. All you had to do is win a match to qualify for the main event and face the one guy that the decision would be made upon the dogs themselves. Realizing that I would be fucked for eternity.

Fbut you don’t know such a deed like that do you?? DO YOU!!!

Dmitri suddenly realizes his actions and lets go off the man that he was inflicting pain and punishment upon. He grabs his head and lets out an animalistic growl as the man flees away and follows the others that did so before him. Dmitri drops to his knees and screams out even louder.

Dmitri: WHY ISN’T ANYONE LISTENING!!?

He clenches his fingers into the concrete and scratches before he starts to burst out in insane laughter before the shot fades.

Please let it stop

We can see Dmitri sit down in a chair, where his arms and legs are chained down by a large rusty chain. He is bare chested and has not shaved his beard in weeks seemingly, he is hanging his head down as he is staring to the ground causing him to breathe very heavy.

Dmitri: Why can it not stop?? Don’t they know that I don’t want it anymore and yet I cannot stop needing it?? I’ve been trying to get over it for years!! And every time I get sucked into this more and more!! Even now, even when I try to protect myself from further punishment…. I still keep desiring it… I keep wanting it!! I keep needing it!! And all I have to do is do the same thing that I have only been successful once…. The greatest shame that I had to endure in my entire undead life.

He lifts his head sideways, causing his hair to fall on top of his right cheek, hanging over his mouth as he is sadistically smiling for some reason. His sadistic nature is trying to consume his sadness.

Dmitri: Is it your own egotistical nature that needs to be fed Fenris? Or is it perhaps the sick and twisted nature of our beloved leaders that seem to be incapable of doing no wrong?? Oh I would just die smiling if ANYONE has the guts to tell me the truth instead of their egotistic nature to take over from their brains that seemed incapable of doing the right thing and just shoot me!! Oh I know that deep in your troubled mind you want to set things straight, I know in your troubled mind you wish to tell the world that the man he favored to win the Battle Royal and got to face Fenris for the gold had failed. Oh I’m sorry if I am unable to put my hands together and applaud your attempts to anger me…. I just so happened that I got tied up.

And yet does it truly matter Fenris?? You will have your meaningful victory over a former world champion, cementing your legacy and your roll that you wish to be on before facing the man that you need to face. How was it that you said at the reporters after beating Ty?? Oh yeah, it was no Kris Ryans. Oh how easily the satisfaction settles in after winning that championship belt and forget about all the troubles that seemed to lay ahead isn’t it my friend??

He slowly starts to whisper some Russian words to the camera, unable to understand the words that causes him to laugh in a maniacal fashion. He drops his head once more before starting to shake it from left to right. He lifts up his face and stares at the camera for the first time.

Dmitri: I know that questions that starts with why never solves problems, it only creates them or increases them. And why am I doing this to you? Why am I allowing the same mistake to happen to me over and over again? Why? Tell me why and I will overshadow you with the gift of life that you need to fight for more than any other particular thing that excuses could tell the world that you weren’t able to motivate yourself.

Dmitri: And I know why that is….

Because your life is meaningless at this moment isn’t it?? Even if you are the champ, even if you are beating people from left to right. Even if you are undefeated since joining this federation, it means nothing at this moment now that your life has turned a blind eye to the reality. Focused upon your own personal problem, causing your life to be upside down. How ironic is that even at that level you wish to outdo me. Is that how you live your life Fenris?? Being a victim to society because you feel that it adds to your assumed character of being the brave Icelandic warrior. Coming from a bloodline that is as cold as the south pole at night. But that isn’t it is it Fenris?? No it is so much more that you just wish to take my route as well and show the world that this world champion can deal with his own animosity towards one of the people that you thought meant something to you, that you could trust and is the one that you should be hating.

Hatred is something that you have not shown and to be honest, imitation is such a flattering thing to behold. Wanting to face the man that has been kept away from you on the cruise ship. Wanting the man that would solidify your championship reign and in the end just did not get what you wanted.

Do I smell  a spoiled little brat???

A sinister laugh comes over him as he suddenly starts to attempt to break free from the chains, but is unsuccessful. Sighing as he finally gives up before lifting up his face towards the camera, causing his hair to fall away from his face and smiles into the camera as if he is waiting to go on a school trip as an excited young child.

Dmitri: I guess Ekaterina wasn’t lying that these chains are unlike everything that I’ve encountered in my entire life. But of course yours is much larger in agonizing pain in comparison towards mine, or is the realization finally setting in that you don’t want to face a man like me to solidify your reign. Accept your fate that I am right!! Accept the fact that you never needed a failure like me to solidify anything!! J2H never needed anyone! Calvin Harris same thing, Kris Ryans!!! Drake Green!! Hell even the current Roulette champion didn’t needed anyone like your words needed to make the world convince that you needed me.

How stupid are you truly poster boy of the tabloids that are shredding you a new one. But that’s something that I could care less off, I want that belt Fenris. I NEED that belt!! Or else I just need to escape the realms of the unthinkable that you call your own stinking homes!! But that’s it, your home is only a temporarily existence before someone else buys the weight off your shoulders and take home the mortgage until you cannot bear it anymore.

For me that championship was a rental Fenris, some odd analogy after enduring the starting of a soap opera that is nothing compared to mine. Step out of the punishment that you will endure hwile you still have a chance. Because you are not ME!!!!

A sudden outburst is being stopped by the chains that are heavily draped across his wrists. Causing a flesh wound to emerge and fade just as quickly, but every time there’s some friction you can see blood emerge.

Dmitri: You see that blood Fenris? That’s the blood that I have shed in all those hard fought losses, blood that was boiling inside of me when I saw that towel thrown in that cell. All I had to do was accepting that stake through the heart and I was better off than I am right now. Death would have been so much bearable than life under these circumstances. Having to watch a mature man that cannot handle something that is personal and runs off like a little bitch. Is that our champion?? Is that the man that wanted to face me??

I only see a man that has come this far because of whom you have faced and the circumstances that elevated you above others. And before you get all cranked up over a few words that I spoke out to you…. Why don’t you just think for a second and realize that I am absolutely right!!! Oh no, you are a proud man. You are a proud Icelandic heritage defender, a man that needs to set his head straight and what better way to challenge a battered and broken vampire. Some tough guy you have become huh champ??

And I know your only comeback will be is why I didn’t beat Ty West to advance. I didn’t…, yeah, but it doesn’t change the fact that I am right!! Deep down inside you already had this planned after you saw me fail. Rubbing your hands and tell the Sins that this was going to be easy. A walk through the park isn’t it?? Too bad that the park has been swallowed by the darkness that has consumed me. I am only more than willing to swallow your pride as a whole and spit it out…. Only to leave your carcass to suffer through the same pain that I have gone through

And what has it been that I had endured?? Being alive when I should have been dead, being allowed to live and remember every single memory. Waking up in sweat every single time because I dream of those moments every single night!! Now tell me something you punk ass kid?? Is that what keeps you alive at night? Is that what has entered your own world just because Kris Ryans is fucking up your head?? I just don’t care anymore, I just don’t wish to listen to your reasons why you are going to win and why you are going to beat me. And you know why???

He lifts up his hands and wipes his hair back as he stares back at the camera with a cold and sinister look upon his face.

Dmitri: Because I’ve already heard them all before, because you will not alter anything that you have already have said in your wet dream promo for the Summer XXXTreme. And yet, this time it won’t be just you and me. It will be me vs. every sad moment in my life that I have to endure once more thanks to you. But after this moment is over, I will not look back. I will not tell the world why I have lost or won…. Because I will not feel it anymore…. It will just happen Fenris, it will just happen what needs to happen. Something that I have already come to peace with…., too bad that shame will end you altogether…. Because in the end there’s only a few words I will say like the great mind once sang….

A tous le monde
A tous les amis
Je vous aime
Je dois partir
These are the last words
I'll ever speak
And they'll set me free

After this Climax Control Fenris, I WILL be set free…. Too bad that you will merely witness it… yet unable to understand it…. welcome to my shame…. It’s time for you to end yours…. Permanently….

With that the shot slowly fades.