Back To Reality
#NP "Grime of the Century" by Orgy
Locale: The Road (Outside of Azusa, California)
It's a long hard road out of Azusa. As much as I act like I don't care about anything, I care almost too much. According to my GPS, Long Beach is less than an hour away from Azusa, but I really need some time to think. I've purposely veered off course, and despite the constant nagging to make a U-turn, or reroute, I just need some time to think. I've got a full tank of gas, and four dollars to my name. I can take a few hours to just drive around. Besides, it's not like anyone is with me. Connor and Tessa opted to stay overnight at the hotel, and Celeste wanted to fly, for whatever stupid reason. She's not always that smart, or she's a little too spoiled to make an hour long drive. Whatever the case is, I'm all on my own tonight. Alexis is off doing whatever, as she usually is, so that's nothing different. Probably getting her birthday pound cake on with Johnny. It's not my business. It's really not.
Then why the hell does it bother me so much? Is it because I opened myself up to both of them, only for one to screw me over by leaving me stuck with this Nobodies vision all on my own? While the other one is off screwing the guy who screwed me over? Is it because they both betrayed me, after I tried to help them straighten up their lives? I helped Johnny get clean, only for him to turn around and start using again, and yet somehow, he thinks he's better than me now. Where was all that money when he was crashing in my dad's office on the couch? Where was all this confidence when he was nodding, strung out at the gym? Where was this current overly confident douchebag when he was dope sick puking in the back of my car? Alexis didn't see any of this, because I wouldn't let her. I didn't want her to have this terrible vision of Johnny when we were supposed to be working together, because I had faith that Johnny would change. He did, but definitely not for the better. If Alexis can't see that, and see that he's still up to his same old tricks, trying to get what he can out of anyone, then it's on her!
Even the shadows of the night don't stop me from noticing the sad look on my own face in the rear view mirror. I can't even fool myself on this one. Every part of me wants to warn her, but Alexis is so headstrong. When she gets an idea in that pretty little head of hers, there's no changing her mind. Believe me, I've tried. I've tried until I was blue in the face, and I just can't do it anymore. I have love for her, and that's why I couldn't even call and wish her a happy birthday yesterday, or mention it to her today when we "talked". I can't stand to see her self destruct so badly. She's distanced herself, and I can't say that I'm mad at her for it, because I did the same thing. I think that, if I want to move on, and be a friend to her like she needs... I have to get over these feelings for her. I have to move on. Everyone tells me that I'm young, and I'm growing into my looks, and that I will have no problems finding someone to care about me, no matter what path I choose to go down on.
I think the point of all of this going on in my head is that I'm heartbroken. I'm lost. I feel like part of myself has been missing for months, and I don't even know where to start to get that back. I'm a leader, but it feels more like the blind leading the blind. The only ones who find the right path are the ones who see how full of shit I am, and leave me. I'm a fixer. I try to fix things, situations, and people. Unfortunately for me, no one ever takes the time to see that I'm broken, and that I could use a little fixing myself. I need help, and I know exactly where to go for that help. I've known since I set the coordinants on my GPS, that I needed to stop by the North home in Beverly Hills. I don't know why, but something is pulling me there. I think I would feel safe under their roof. However, before I even realize it, I'm pulling into their half circle driveway, sitting in front of the gate. A security guard stands up in the booth on this side of the gate, and looks at the car. He almost immediately recognizes me as he opens up the window to the booth.
Ralph: Heyyyy, Timmy! Good to see ya, man. Celeste ain't here yet and I don't know when she'll be here.
Me: That's okay, Ralphie. She's flying to the next show location. I'm actually here to see Crystalline.
Ralph: Oh, man, she ain't here neither. She at her circle tonight, but she should be back in a couple hours. You wanna go wait inside?
Me: Sure thing.
He opens the gate, and I reach over to bump fists with him. He's probably the most positive person I've ever met in my life, despite spending so much time sitting inside of a box, watching after Celeste's family. I drive on past the security box, and around to the front door. It actually takes a few minutes, what with the huge yard they have. I turn my car off and just sit there for a minute. I reach down the the necklace I am wearing. It is a piece that my mother, my egg donor, Roxanne, left me when she left me. Despite my feelings for her, it has always made me feel safe when I pick the celtic cross up, and run my fingers over it. Celeste and Crystalline blessed it to protect me at all times. I haven't taken it off in well over a month. I can almost see a blue glow coming from it, especially in the light of the moon. I close my eyes as I feel the protective powers flowing through my body, all but my mind, which seems to reject any idea that I'm ever truly safe. It's still comforting. I open my door as the sound of the huge fountain to my side, splashes, a sound that is most soothing to me. I could almost fall asleep right now, as I get out of the car. I walk over to the front door, and I ring the doorbell.
Standing there, I can feel all of the hairs on my body stand on edge. I've been off of the pills for a week and a half now, and I haven't felt that anxiety take its hold over me once it was out of my system. But right now? It's full force. The shakes start. My head feels like it's spinning, and my brain is swimming around inside of it. The metallic zing spreads across my whole tongue, and my legs feel like noodles. I can't breath. I can't breath! Dear God, help me. I'm looking all over for something, anything that could have caused this. Nothing comes to mind. My face feels numb as I lean against the pillar to my right. Every second feels like an hour as I lick at my lips to try to gain some kind of moisture to them, but my tongue is almost as dry as sandpaper. A cold sweat comes to my forehead, as my armpits feel like they are on fire. I lean over as my stomach feels like it's about to explode inside of my abdomen. It feels like there is a ton of bricks sitting on my chest, and I fall to one knee. I reach up and press the doorbell button once more, pounding weakly on the front door. I grab onto the handle to turn it, but it's locked. Ralphie, how can I wait inside when no one is home? Oh God, help me!
I pull myself up to a standing position with the doorknob, and lean against the door frame, just in time for Chad Miller to open the door. He smiles for a second, until he sees the expression on my face. I can't talk, even as he talks to me.
Chad: Hey, Tim. What's up? Tim?
He notices how flushed I am, and he wraps his arm around my back, ducking under my left arm to help me stumble inside. He helps me to a chair, and sits me down. Without asking a single question, he grabs a crystal pitcher from the table, and walks over to an indoor fountain, dipping the pitcher into it. He brings it over to the table in front of me, and pours some into a silver chalice, lifting it up toward my mouth. I grab onto it, and tilt it back some, as the surprisingly cold liquid fills my mouth. I gulp it down, unsure at first, but it tastes nothing like water. It tastes of mint... cotton candy... sunshine... heaven? Before I know it, the chalice is empty, and Chad pours more into it. He lifts it toward my mouth once more, only this time I feel like I have a little more strength to handle it on my own. I gulp it down within seconds. I can hardly hear Chad speaking as my ears ring.
Chad: Don't tell me you took something. Did Celeste do it, too?
I can't really respond. I just shake my head from side to side. I hold the chalice out once more, and Chad pours more of the crisp liquid into it. I take a few deep breaths, and sip on the liquid, slow this time, so that I can savor whatever the hell this is, letting it moisten my mouth so that I can rid my mouth of the dry feeling, and the metallic taste.
Chad: You just look like you're having a bad trip or something. I'm glad you're alright.
Me: Yeah...
Cool. I said a word, so that's a good sign. I lean back on the white plush sofa, feeling like I'm sitting on a cloud. I'm still catching my breath as I stare over at Chad. Apparently, my eyes are still wide, because he still looks very concerned.
Chad: Not to, um, ask too many questions? But, uh, what are you doing here?
Me: I... don't know. I just had a feeling that I was supposed to come here, and...
I take a deep breath, and then Chad seems to get it. He holds a hand up, stopping me from having to explain any further. The fire crackles loudly in the fireplace for a second there, which causes me to jump a little until I look over to see the embers glowing and flying out in tiny sparkles.
Chad: I don't know what that shit is, but any time I ever had a little too much to drink, or just felt off, Crystalline would give me some of that, and I'd feel better in minutes. No judgments here. I'm sure you can figure out how often I've had to force feed it to Celeste, but it works. It tastes like bourbon, and powdered sugar, and mint, and... goodness.
Interesting. I nod my head as I nurse another sip from the chalice. I don't taste any of that other than mint, but judging by the smile on his face, those must be things that make him happy. It must be some sort of blessed elixir or something. Who knows in this house, but it is one of the things that makes me feel safe about being here, despite whatever came over me just moments ago.
Me: I've gone through a lot lately. I hate to keep using it as an excuse for looking like an idiot, but I have. And my one lifeline, I flushed down the toilet over a week ago. Don't worry, a doctor prescribed them to me...
It's Chad's turn to nod his head now. From all of the bad things that Celeste says about the guy, he's actually kind. He listens, and tries to make me feel better. I don't know him at all, and after the dream a few weeks back, and the Nobodies hotel party, it still feels a bit awkward, but the feeling slowly begins to fade.
Me: I'm sorry to just barge in on your evening like this, having a freak out. Thanks for helping me and listening, even though we don't really know each other that well.
Chad: Ouch, bruh. That really hurts...
He clutches at her chest, as a sad expression covers his face. He shakes his head in disappointment, and just as I open my mouth to question him, he starts chuckling.
Chad: So I guess that kiss meant nothing. I see how it is.
Me: Uhhh, you came out of nowhere and forced that on me as a joke or whatever. If anyone should be upset about it, it should be me!
He chuckles at me as I grow more and more serious. Not to mention the fact that he's been texting me off and on lately, following up, I guess? This is getting confusing again, though I'm too relaxed from the elixir to question it any further.
Chad: Chill out. I was just playing around. There's no need to make a case of it. Celeste has been kinda crazy lately, and she made me do it.
Me: And I suppose she also made you text me twice a day since then? Yeah, I'd believe that just as easily.
Chad: I'm sorry if that confused you. I just saw how down in the dumps you were, and thought you could use a friend.
Me: I don't need any friends, Chad. Friends only serve to complicate things. I've already had my fill of them, if I'm being honest.
Chad's eyes sink as he sighs, shrugging his shoulders. I can tell something is off with him, and the fixer in me sends an instant feeling of remorse for what I'd just said to him. All at once, I begin to feel the bricks returning to my chest.
Me: I'm sorry. It's not your fault that I've had some bad luck with friends lately. I just... I...
As I try to unburden myself, hoping that it will make me feel better, it almost seems to do the opposite. My skin quickly goes pale as I stare down at the ground, watching it shake as if we were experiencing an earthquake. I struggle to catch my breath, but I can't even hear what Chad is saying as my ears ring. He stops and looks at me, not giving me the chance to try to talk as he shoots up from his chair. He walks over to me, and helps me to my feet. He walks with me as I wheeze, trying so hard to catch my breath. He helps me up the stairs, one at a time, his arms tightly around me as I almost seem to try to fall with each step. We make it to the top of the steps, and he guides me toward the bedroom. I look inside, and it's almost the size as one floor of my house. I'm not sure if it's a halucenation, or if it's for real. He sets me down on the bed, and I curl up with one of the pillows. I squeeze onto it tightly as Chad goes to cover me up.
Me: No? No blanket, please. It will stop me from breathing...
Chad: Um, alright?
Chad drops the blanket down to my feet and pulls a chair up near the bed. He sits down on it backwards, watching over me closely.
Chad: It's gonna be alright, buddy. Just relax. You're safe now.
I nod my head, but my shirt... I can't breathe with it on! I sit up quickly and struggle with my shirt, trying to get it off as I repeat "No, no, no..." over aloud. I seem to get tangled up in it, causing me to flail even more. After a moment of this, Chad leans forward, tilting the chair back a bit as he does, and he holds my arms still. Once I stop resisting, he slowly reaches on the underside of the shirt, and slowly lifts it up. My heart feels like it's going to beat out of my chest, and I close my eyes. However, I can see the veins in my eyes pulsating. I feel Chad's hand rest on my shoulder.
Chad: Dude, just lay down and relax. Crystalline will be home in a bit, and we'll get you something to chill you out. I'm right here if you need anything.
Me: I... I...
Chad places a finger over my lips, and then gently presses against me shoulder, pushing me back down to the bed. I suck in deep breaths as I try my best to relax. I close my eyes, watching the red flashes like bolts of lightning against my eyelids. They slow down some, but not enough. I open my eyes to see Chad staring at me. I know this is going to sound like a strange request, but...
Me: Will you... hold me?
I'm embarrassed even hearing myself say it. Chad seems taken aback by it, and even a bit hesitant to the idea. However, seeing me in the shape that I'm in, he stands up from his chair. He walks to the edge of the bed and slowly crawls up it. He tries to find the least sexual way to do this. It's just a bro hug, right? Right? I tell myself that as we lie there, and as soon as he rests on a position of the arms, I calm down enough to where I don't even notice that Chad has a phone call. He reaches over me and picks the phone up off of the nightstand. Hearing his low voice talking into the phone is soothing, and eventually, I fall asleep without realizing it.
BDS-OMG!
#NP "Pussy Liquor" by Rob Zombie
Locale: Los Angeles, California
"Insert cryptic bullshit here..."
When I found out that Amanda Cortez was my partner for the Blast From the Past tournament, I was really excited. Sure, she's a sex icon in wrestling, and not just because she's beautiful, but also because she's a fetish club owner. Speaking of her club, she's invited me to it in order to get more acquainted so that we can team together much better. I didn't know what I was getting myself into, because I was picturing a Christian Grey penthouse with a red room, but his red room pales in comparison to the general area. I see so many mashing and clamped genitals, I feel as if my own is trying to crawl back inside of my body. I cringe at the sight of the unflattering displays surrounding me, and find myself shielding my own eyes. It's not like I'm innocent myself, but this is enough to make me blush. I continue walking through the club until I reach the back, near the bar area. I watch as a blonde woman leans down toward the table, taking a big sniff with a straw before wiping frantically at her nose. No one bats an eyelash, but me. I stare for a moment as she smirks at me.
Woman: Come to mama, little boy. I'll read you a bedtime story while you feed.
Me: No... thanks?
I turn on the balls of my heels, and nearly bump right into Amanda Cortez herself. She smiles and gives me a warm hug before kissing each side of my face. She stares at me for a moment with her almost black eyes, looking me up and down.
Amanda: Thank you so much for coming tonight, Tim. I have been so excited ever since I found out I was teaming with you for the tournament.
Tim: Yeah, I've been...
My eyes wander to the very vivid scenery around me, and my head quickly jerks back in her direction. I must not have been very subtle as she giggles at me, resting her hand on my shoulder as she continues to look up at me.
Amanda: Come, come. Meet my wife, Rose.
That is a relief, because I swore she was hitting on me right there. Sometimes I worry too much about the small details. She takes my hand and leads me toward an exclusive table, where another blond woman, one who is much more classy looking than the breast feeding lady, is sitting at the table with a glass of rose colored wine in it. She sips as her blue eyes look me over all the way, but definitely not in a good way. Amanda brings me over to the table where she insists I have a seat next to Rose. As I scoot into the booth, Amanda scoots in on the other side of me.
Amanda: Would you like anything to drink, Tim? maybe a cigar?
Me: Um, you do know I'm only seventeen, right?
Amanda: Oh, right. How about a coke then?
She winks at me as she waves her hand, and a scantily clad woman walks over to our table as Amanda whispers to her, and she nods her head and disappears as quickly as she arrived. Amanda reaches to the center of the table, and toward a box. She pulls out a cigar, and hands it to me, along with a pair of cigar cutters. I am familiar with them, but I've never partaken before. I sniff the cigar for anything funny, but it seems to be nothing more than a good quality tobacco. I place it to my lips and cut the tip off. Amanda happily pulls a match away from the candle in the middle of the table, and she lights it for me, burning slow and smooth. As I blow some of the smoke out, I turn to her and smile.
Me: Thank you, Amanda. For all of this. I thought since I was so young, you would act like any other Bombshell in SCW, and just totally ignore me, or get angry that you were teamed with me.
Amanda: No, I would never think this about you. I've seen you in the ring, and I know exactly how good you are. I feel lucky to have someone so young and vibrant as my partner. I was afraid I would get someone like Steve Ramone or Travis Nathaniel Andrews. Someone with so much big talk, but not so much to back it up. Instead, I wound up with you...
Amanda runs her finger over my newly cut hair, and I fidget nervously at first. The waitress hands me my soda, and then disappears again as I turn toward Rose.
Tim: Um, how rude of me. My name is Tim Staggs, and you must be Rose?
Rose: That is me. I am Amanda's loving wife.
The two look to one another, and there's definitely some kind of silent conversation going on, but I'm not picking any of it up. I just stare between the two women as they both begin to grin. They lean back in their seats, and I feel at ease for a moment, until I take a sip of my drink. As soon as it hits my tongue, I taste the harsh notes of Gentlemen's Jack Daniels mixed into the cola. I nearly cough it up, but it's not my first run with alcohol, so I choke it back and breath softly.
Rose: Luckily, I am used to the life of a wrestler's wife. I understand that being on the road is so stressful, and being married to a woman as beautiful as Amanda, I have to get used to the fact that others look at her. Others, such as Max Burke...
Amanda gasps as Rose reaches around and lightly tickles her stomach, while taking a moment to also sniff me out. However, instead of reacting badly, she leans back away, and begins running her finger over my other ear.
Rose: I don't really get jealous often. Men and women just adore Mandy, and I understand that. I just wish...
Amanda: What do you wish, Rose?
Rose: I just sometimes wish that I could go on these adventures with her.
Tim: Oh, you mean on the road? I'm sure she could get you...
Rose slowly shakes her head from side to side as a grin appears on her face. She doesn't speak the word, but her lips move to express the word "no" as she gently taps the tip of my nose with her finger. Okay, pardon me for saying this, but... BONER ALERT! Not one, but two hot girls are coming onto me... ME! I almost can't believe it. Wait, scratch that... I CAN'T believe it! I would pinch myself to make sure I'm actually awake right now, but Rose does it for me, twisting my nipple in a delightfully painful way. I suck in air between my teeth as I close my eyes, and give a deep giggle straight from my stomach.
Tim: Sweet bitch, that's nice...
Amanda: I don't know about Rose, but I find that after a few drinks, I really enjoy the back room of the club. Of course, it is only twenty one and up during business hours.
Rose: But business hours are up in about fifteen minutes, my love. What could we do for fifteen minutes?
Amanda stops and thinks for a moment. However, Rose seems to know the answer all along. She reaches over and lifts up my shirt, exposing my ripped body, tattoos and all. She looks at it up and down as she begins to massage my chest, while Amanda massages my stomach. I bite onto my bottom lip, trying not to seem too eager.
Amanda: I just saw the SCW site and see who our opponents really are. I have to say, I'm starting to get nervous that you won't know what to do in the ring against your father, or that you might lose on purpose to help him.
Tim: I've known all along, and do you know what? I'm not nervous at all.
Amanda: Why not? He says that he's a former five time world champion. This is a lot of world championships, and four of them were when he was last in the ring.
I laugh at this. True, my father is upset with the disrespect he gets in this business to this very day, but turnabout is fair play, isn't it?
Me: That was years ago. He's suffered two broken knees, and he hasn't actually wrestled for three years now, just about. He's out of shape. He's in denial that his golden days are long gone. It's time for a new generation to take the stage, and there is a newer, younger Staggs on the scene.
Rose: I bet your father would hate to hear you say such mean things about him. But Mandy and I are loving it. Keep going, please? It makes me so hot when I hear a man talk about violence.
Me: Well then, I wonder what it will do when you tune in on Sunday and watch me break his knee cap again. Three strikes and you're out, old man. "I can say it, you can't!" He knows I'm just kidding around... mostly... But, everyone who has tuned in to see who my mystery opponent is, they are just laughing at me. They don't think that I stand a chance in beating him. Well, if they were to look at the facts, they would see that he trained me. Not only did he train me, but so did Giani Di Luca, Ben Jordan, Connor Murphy, as well as Mickey Carroll, my uncles, and my great uncle Erik. Not only that, but I am in peak physical shape, and I know his repertoire better than anyone. So, if there is a person that is most likely to take him out of the tournament, it will be me.
Amanda: That's right. Just focus on him, and leave Lucy Seraphina to me.
Amanda rests against my chest as she continues to rub my stomach. Honestly, I don't want her to know this, but she's winning right now. She is in full control, and a fire is being lit underneath me. I take another puff from my cigar as I lean back, leaving my chest and stomach more exposed for both ladies to continue.
Me: My dad is a has been in this company. Don't get me wrong, he put this company on the map, and I respect that from him, but this isn't 2013 anymore. This is 2016, and his time in the spotlight is over. He just doesn't realize how silly he is going to look. He doesn't realize that so much time has passed, and so many talents have come and gone, that most of the locker room, and most of the fans, don't remember him. His ego will have a hard time getting through the curtains on Sunday. But don't worry... I'll be there to knock him right off of his feet, and on his big fucking head. All of that tough talk about beating me so easily because I haven't done anything. He made fun of the tag titles, and yes, they are a laugh. As a former Bombshell Tag Team Champion, three times over, you have to agree, right?
Amanda: For sure. The titles are meaningless really.
Me: Then how come he could never get his hands on them? He can say it all he wants, but he never held those titles, and he once told me, on camera, that he was proud of me for doing something he's never done before. In the ten months I've been in SCW, I've already held a championship, and defended it against a former World Heavyweight Champion, someone who held the belt he made famous. I toured the world, and the seven seas. What has he done in the last ten months besides play Mr. Mommy, and help train my army? How many titles has he held? He's done NOTHING. He's held NONE. He sounds like a fourty year old former high school quarterback, reliving his sad, pathetic glory days long after they've passed. That's not going to be me. I won't sit here and say that what I've done so far is ground breaking, or earth shattering. But, what I've done surpasses what he's done in the last year. He can't take that away from me, no matter how hard he tries.
Amanda and Rose lift my shirt off as my body glistens underneath the red lights of the club. Amanda leans in and kisses on my neck as Rose takes the opposite side of my neck. I pause, shuddering as I stare down at each one. I puff on my cigar, giving a light smoke screen so that I might keep this moment all to myself.
Me: My dad needs to wake up and smell the oil of the ring ropes, because this is today, and today, I am the only active member of the Staggs Family. It isn't because they are giving me the spotlight. It is because I'm demanding it. I'm out there, slowly earning it, and while no one seems to think of me, I'm still far ahead of my dad in the popularity ratings. The only thing I need to catapult myself to the stars and become a real Somebody is to beat a Hall of Famer such as himself. I've already beaten champions and former champions. After I beat my father, no one can deny me what is rightfully mine, and that is the throne at the center of the Staggs Family court. And just because we are related, that doesn't mean that I'm going to take it easy on him. I don't expect him to take it easy on me either. This is about bragging rights for now, and for so much later on.
Just then, the lights in the club start to shut off, and regular lights slowly take their place. The crowd begins to make their way to their clothing as the music stops. However, Amanda and Rose rise up from their seats, as they take my hands and help me to my feet. They guide me out of the booth as I grin and wag my eyebrows.
Me: And dad? Don't you dare try to get a cheap win by threatening statutory rape, because this is anything but... I'll see you at home later... and then I'll see you Sunday.
I wink at the camera as Rose and Amanda giggle, guiding me toward the door to the back room. Amanda unfastens my belt as Rose rips it clean off, revealing my Andrew Christian trunks as my jeans fall to the floor. Instead of trying to get a hold of them, I just kick them off as both ladies grab a chunk of my backside, and we disappear into the back room. The scene fades... TO BLACK!
