It's the not knowing that kills you...
Not knowing what's going on, not knowing what is happening behind closed doors, not knowing what you really should know. Not being told what's really going on in the minds of others.
It happens more than you know. Every damn day, millions of people withhold information, it doesn't matter how close they are. It makes you wanna scream, it makes you wanna grab them and shake them, but in hindsight, it doesn't really matter most of the time, it shows people's true colours, it shows they're not as snow white as they want you to believe, but when it's up most important, a real matter of life and death, that's when the game changes.
Desert Springs Medical center, Nevada.
"I know O." My voice is heard saying "I will get back to you as soon as I can, but you know."
I sigh as I lean against a wall in the hospital, my phone pressed against my ear, my face drawn, my eyes tired as I breathe deep.
"I know Mel is doing a good job fussing over you while I'm here, but still..." I trail off "I know you'd be here if you could but you know you can't fly at this point, it's just not safe right now."
I pause as I listen to my wife at the other end of the line.
"I don't know." I answer "The doctors are telling us shit right now. For all this healthcare shit that Synn pays for, it doesn't make their lips any looser. We're all just sitting around scratching our arses until someone can be bothered to get off their's and come and tell us something."
I pause once more, yawning deeply.
"We're all here." I say down the phone "But no one is saying a hell of a lot. It's one of the worst feelings in the world not knowing if someone is safe or not."
I run my fingers through my hair with my free hand.
"Nah, I'm just tired O." I comment "But I'll be alright. Yeah, I gotta go. I'll be back with you as soon as I can."
I pause for a second.
"I love you too." I say "Thank Mel again for looking after ya while I'm here.... yeah, ok, bye."
I press a button on my phone, ending the call to my wife as I look around at the life around me. Doctors, nurses, other medical professionals move past me at pace, yet feeling like slow motion to my tired eyes, and my mind racing at a million miles an hour. A burly hand rests upon my shoulder, snapping my attention to my right, where I see Synn standing next to me, in his free hand, a cup of coffee. He holds the coffee in front of me.
"You look tired Gabriel" Synn informs me.
My eyes meet his as I hold back a yawn.
"Stating the obvious there." I say "Tired is an understatement."
Synn hands me the cup of coffee, the heat burning through the plastic container.
"Why don't you go home and rest?" He says "You've had it worst than most here, what with looking after your pregnant wife, being heavily involved in work, pressures of a champion and everyone wanting to be near you."
"I'm ok." I lied "Besides, we're standing in a cardiac unit here, where people could be minutes from bad shit happening and changing the lives of so many around them. I think when you look at that bigger picture, lack of sleep is the last of my worries here."
Synn nods with an understanding look on his face.
"You look worse than I do anyway." I tell him.
Synn roll his shoulders back, the strain of the last few days telling on his face.
"Yes, more than likely" Synn replies emotionless "Did you talk to Odette?"
"Yep" I say with a firm nod "She really wants to be here but she's at that part of pregnancy stops her from flying, but she's gonna call all the time, if only to escape Melody for a while."
A smile crosses Synn's face.
"Melody does seem like the fussing type." Synn says, his wide smile slowly fading.
"She is." I reply "But she's doing me a big favor to the point I might have to let her drive the Veyron as a thank you."
A yawn passes my lips, air escaping firmly from my lungs.
"Anyway, any news?" I ask, pointing to the door with my head.
Synn shakes his head firmly.
"Still nothing." He says with a monotone to his voice.
I raise the hot coffee to my lips, taking a sip of the dark liquid.
"Maybe we should get back to the waiting room" I say to Synn.
"Probably a good idea" Synn agrees "We don't really want to be leaving Joshua there without us around too much longer. Who knows what he might get up to."
"Probably dress up as a surgeon and do some very odd things, like try and turn someone from human to teddy bear." I reply "Although part of me would like to see that."
Synn tilts his head, processing the thought.
"We should really get back." He says as he turns on his heels.
I follow Synn down the hallway, reaching a door on my right hand side. Synn reaches down at the silver handle and forces it down, opening the door, and causing five sets of eyes to look in our direction. I follow Synn in to the room as Despayre, Shane Boswell, Fantasia, Kittie and Rage look in our direction, distracting them from what they were doing. Despayre looks up from the floor, Angel in front of him in full doctors attire, Fantasia lowers a fashion magazine, Shane looks up from his phone and Rage turns from looking out of a window, to a half full car park below and Kittie turns from looking at Despayre. I move amongst them, sitting down in the small, yet secluded room. Rage walks away from the window, sitting opposite me.
"Nice to see you again Rage." I mumble.
Rage looks at me through narrowed eyes.
"What?" He starts "No peanut head jokes after all this time?"
I roll my shoulders backwards before shrugging them at the man I haven't seen for a long, long time.
"Man, I spent most of the week awake, maybe two hours sleep a night if that. I have to jump through hoops to lead SCW, spending my time around people I really don't want to. I do all that's asked of me constantly, and now with all this." I rant "I'm thinking talking about your odd, misshaped, peanut impersonating head isn't really high on my list.... oh wait..."
I fake a smile towards Rage and turn my head away from Rage.
"You went through that entire rant just to mention my head..." he growls.
"It's not always just about the finish Rage." I start "It's mostly about the build up."
"You haven't changed magic man." Rage tells me.
"Neither have you." I reply "You've been wearing those same clothes for the last three years. Seriously, have a chat with the Mean Girls, and maybe they can make you more stylish."
Rage clenches his jaw as the others in the room smile at the never ending pissing contest I've had with Rage for years..
"It's like you two were never apart." Synn comments.
"I'd like to spend more time apart." Rage mutters under his breath.
"That wouldn't work anyway." Despayre adds.
The room turns to look at Despayre, sitting on the floor and looking at Angel, his attention never leaving the stuffed bear on the floor.
"What wouldn't work Despy?" I ask him.
Despayre breaks the stare from his furry friend and looks at me.
"Well, not even the Mean Girls could make uncle Rage fashionable." He says with a serious look on his face "I mean they're good, but they're not THAT good."
A wide smile crosses my face as Despayre turns his attention back towards Angel. Rage shakes his head slowly and firmly, his face turning a more of a red shade.
"I really haven't missed you guys" He forces out between gritted teeth.
"Lies!" Despayre says as he keeps his attention on Angel "Angel says you call him every single night before bed so he can read you a bedtime story!"
A chuckle of laughter rolls around the room as Rage angrily stands up.
"Bullshit!" He yells out.
"Swear jar" Despayre say, firing a hand out towards Rage without looking at him.
Rage reaches in to his pocket, pulling out a crumpled note and throwing it towards Despayre. Despayre pats his hand around the floor, finding the note and pulling it towards him. The laughter dies down in the room and my eyes look around at the worn looking faces around, each looking more tired than they should be. A somber mood fills the room as the realization of the setting kicks in. I stand up, slowly pacing up and down in the room.
"Why the hell haven't they told us anything?" I ask the room, speaking to no one in particular.
The other five look around the room at each other, no one really knowing the answer, each a little lost in their own thoughts.
"Anyone?" I ask.
Synn looks in my direction, lifting his head from his hands.
"I don't know." He says
"Can't we send peanut head to start chokeslamming doctors until someone tells us something." I comment "That's if he remembers how to do a chokeslam."
Rage snaps his head towards me.
"Of course I remember how to chokeslam!" He says firmly "And I don't say this at all, but that's the best idea magic man has come up with ever."
Synn presses his hands together, as if he's thinking about the proposal.
"No..." he slowly says "We run the risk of getting banned from here, and Rage getting arrested."
"And having a prison reunion with his butt buddy called Bubba." I quickly comment.
"Who's Bubba?" Despayre asks innocently.
"Rage's friend." I say with a grin.
"I don't know anyone called Bubba!" Rage protests "No one at all called Bubba! Magic man, one day I'm gonna kill you."
"To be reunited with Bubba." I quickly fire back.
"Shut the fu..." Rage looks towards Despayre, his hand already out to take another swear jar donation. "Just shut up!"
Part of me has missed Rage and the relationship that we have, where we annoy the hell out of each other.... the other part of me is sober
"We just can't sit around doing nothing." I say, getting back on the subject. "We're all sitting around here doing nothing at all, no one is telling us a damn thing, no one has had the decency to even let us know anything, that she's ok, or what happened."
"There's still nothing we can do." Synn says standing up "All we can do is be patient and wait to see what happens."
"Yeah" I start "We'll see about that."
My eyes narrow as Synn sits down, covering his face with his huge hands and rubbing his tired eyes. I look down at Despayre on the floor, just sitting with Angel. I look around the room, looking at everyone lost in their own little world. A slight smile crosses my face as I take a seat next to Despayre, his attention shifting towards me with a turn of his head.
"This sucks Despy." I start
Despayre nods in agreement.
"It sucks more than Dad trying to play Just Dance." Despayre replies "His feet are just too big to have rhythm to dance but he won't listen"
I can't help but smile at the innocent man I look on as a little brother.
"I'm getting tired of waiting Despy." I start "I think we need to somehow get in and see Theresa to make sure she's ok."
"But they won't let us in." Despayre says with a hint of sadness in his voice "Angel tried, that's why he's dressed like a doctor, but he just couldn't do it. Now if Angel can't do it, neither can we."
I rub my chin as I look down at Angel and back at Despayre.
"What if..." I start.
I move my head closer to Despayre's ear and start to whisper in his ear. Despayre nods slowly. before turning back to me.
"Can we use fireworks?" He asks "Or get big ropes, tie them to the roof, climb down the wall and crash through the window?"
"Not a bad idea." I start "But the noise would get us busted right away."
"You have a point." Despayre says "Ok, let's try it your way, but if that doesn't work, ropes and firework, ok?"
"Deal!" I say putting my hand out.
Despayre reaches out, shaking my hand firmly. Despayre and I start to start, Despayre grabbing Angel and lifting him up.
"Where are you two off to?" Synn asks without moving his hands away from his eyes.
"Coffee." I reply.
"I thought we was going to..." Despayre starts.
Before he can finish, I quickly elbow him in the arm, raising a finger to my lips as I look at him. Despayre opens his mouth widely and nods at me, also winking his eye.
"Yeah! Yeah! Coffee!" He says excitedly.
Synn lifts his head up, looking towards us both standing with innocent looks on our faces. Synn stares hard at us both, his eyebrows lowered.
"I know when you two are up to something." Synn slowly says.
"No you don't." Despayre starts "We've done lots of stuff that you've never even heard about!"
"Smooth Despy." I start "Real smooth."
A look of pride and smugness crosses my little brothers face as I run my hand over my forehead, slowly shaking it. Synn stands up, putting a finger up towards us, but the door opens, taking his attention. A man in a white lab coat walks in the room, instantly grabbing the attention of everyone in the room.
"I'm looking for a Mr..." The doctor pauses as he looks for the last name "Synn."
I point towards Synn and the doctor nods in my direction. I take hold on Despayre by the arm, moving him towards the door.
"As soon as we hear what he has to say, we make a break for it." I tell Despayre.
Despayre nods in agreement, and we focus on the doctor...
Sooooo, what did the doctor have to say about Theresa? What are Despy and I about to do? Does anyone really miss Rage? Well the first two questions will be answered at least, but now you have to wait...
Yes, I know, I'm a right bastard for making you wait but all you have to do is wait for Despayre's promo to hit the airways and those first two questions will be answered. The third question, we all secretly know the answer to anyway. Sorry peanut head...
Hell exists...
Trust me, I've been living there for the last couple of weeks. It has really not been the best time in my life lately, regardless of my pregnant wife gonna make me a dad in a couple of months, and regardless of the fact that I am the SCW World Heavyweight champion, other things have well and truly took a turn for the worst.
But it's time to break those shackles and get out of this slump.
I can't stop the fact that a very close friend has had a heart attack, but I sure as hell can put right what has already gone wrong lately. That being you Matheson...
I guess this one was a bit of a shock to me, Sinful Obsession losing a long standing record because of this Matheson character, who seemed to appear out of nowhere and invited himself to the party. I was respectful to this man at first, I mean anyone who can snap that record deserves credit, but then last week happened. Last week just... well... It happened, it just happened. Respect is one thing but being an unwanted guest at a party does get to me.
So well done Matheson, you've turned up with a bottle of cheap booze, and tried to act like you was invited to this dance.
You wasn't.
You beat me, I give you that but did you really beat Sean Jackson, or did I do that for you? As much as this pains me, Jackson had you beat, but I gave you the win. Not because I liked you Matheson, but because I hated you a lot less than I hated Jackson. This is how you repay me for giving you the second biggest win of your career? You gate crashed my party.
Big mistake.
You're a bit out of your league here. It's all fun and games when you get in the ring with people who are better than you, with nothing on the line. It's all a laugh and joke when you have nothing to lose, but when there's something there on the line, that person better than you becomes a little more dangerous, he becomes a little more focused. You inviting yourself to this party, you now have two men looking for a touch of revenge on a man who lucked out, and one of those men is looking to do anything possible to defend what he worked hard to earn. Surely you can see the challenge that you're facing is more than too much for you. You putting your name on that contract has put you in this position. That little rush of blood to your head has put you in a bad place. You're facing a losing battle Matheson so now you need to sit there and look in that mirror, tap the side of your head with one finger and ask yourself that question, that one big question that you should have asked yourself before taking that pen and scribbling your chicken scratch all over that contract...
... Is it worth it?
Well is it? Is it worth putting yourself in this position to only end up as the loser of this one? Was it worth it to be in the position you've now put yourself in? This is what you really need to think about Matheson, because when people gatecrash, when people turn up where they're not wanted, it's not an epic night out with lots of pics all over social media, it's a night out you wanna forget. This is gonna be you Matheson.
You will be the drunk slut at the party...
The waking up with a head full of regrets, wondering what happened, wondering why you went to that place. Your walk away from that ring, will be your very own personal walk of shame. It's where every single regret will come back and hit you hard, it's where you will realize that this party wasn't in your honor, very far from it.
So, is it worth it?
The fact you've put yourself here Matheson should show you didn't do it on merit alone, you had to steal a contract, you had to take it from the man I wanted to destroy one on one to end his little conspiracy claims that I was involved in a plot with Drake Green to take his belt, but you had to try and piss on my cornflakes.
But here's the thing Matheson
You can put yourself on that plate, but you're not the main course to me, your not even a side dish. You're the garnish that people throw away. You make things look a little more interesting but that's all it is. You add absolutely nothing to the dish. This is exactly what you are, that little sprig of green shit that adds a bit of colour to things but overall, you're tasteless, pointless and will get pushed aside and eventually tossed in the trash, just where you belong.
This is not the start of the Matheson story.
Far from it. You don't have a lead role in this drama Matheson, you're like that side character that appears mid way through season three, that no one likes at first, then people get on the bandwagon, just to try and be different, then they're killed off in the finale, and by season four starts, no one even remembers their name. That's pretty much what you are, a forgettable character to most. After this show, you'll be back where you belong, trying to get over to the fans by using trash cans and bleeding all over the place. That's about your level, not mixing it with the big boys like me. Anyone can pick up a weapon to smash someone with, that's not an art form, people do that in bars up and down the country every damn day and night, it's nothing out of the ordinary.
What makes you better than anyone else who can swing a bottle?
Nothing, because you're not better. You're a weapon wielding one trick pony. There's no style to swinging something solid, it just shows that you have doubt in your own ability so you have to go for something tougher than you.
Feel free to mention that I swung a weapon at Sean Jackson last Sunday...
But me swinging a weapon once, compared to you being paid to swing them. No creativity, no talent, just a guy who can hit someone really hard with something other than a body part. What you do Matheson, anyone can do. That little dwarf thing of Hot Stuff's can hit someone with a weapon, a small weapon, but she can do that, does that mean she should be in this match too?
Hardcore is dead, wrestling is for the talented Matheson, this is why you will be exposed when you face more determined wrestlers.
I am more determined than when we last met. Maybe I underestimated you slightly, but that's a mistake that will not be repeated now or in the future. It's a mistake I will make up for being guilty of letting you slip past me that one time. I will be more focused than I ever have been. You will regret ever putting your name on that contract. You should have been sitting in the back watching this one. I will make you wish that you was, Matheson.
I'm now bored of talking about the garnish, I might as well talk about the main course.
Hello Sean, I hope life finds you well and that your arse is less sore now your wife's hand is out of it and you've been liberated from being a puppet.
Part of me thinks I owe you an apology for my actions last week concerning the lovely Pamela, but there's that part of me that sits there and thinks fuck you Sean, you and her got what you both deserved. The question is, what part of me do I listen to. I think I got it... no wait, now I got it.
Fuck you Sean!
Yeah, I made the right choice there. This is what happens when you spend weeks dicking around without giving me an answer. This is what happens when you think you can play mind games to get at me. You force me to lift things up to a higher level and that is not good news for you as you worked out when I had your wife screaming for me last Sunday. That worked on so many levels all because you put her in that place. You put her in danger and I made her scream more than you ever could Sean.
It's amazing how karma works, isn't it?
I mean she started off controlling you enough for you to agree to dick around with me, playing mind games, trying to live up to your name, unknowing the position she would end up in. You should have stopped that Sean. I mean look at me for fucks sake, look at what I've done in the past. A year ago, I was fucking with Steve Ramone, kidnapped and reprogrammed his family, psychologically ripped his family to shreds.
What did you really expect from a man who had done that in the past?
You dropped the ball with me Sean, you should have remembered those days and remembered what I could do and tell Pamela no, you'll just accept or decline my challenge cause I don't play nice when people piss me off, but not you. You decided to agree with her and play these little games instead of sensing the danger and seeing this coming. You're a truly awful husband not to be able to see this and protect your wife from all of this. You put her in my firing line and that is something you shouldn't be able to forget because it's your fault that she's not in the best of shape anymore. It's your damn fault she even made her way backstage at an SCW show let alone put her on television, in the ring, it's your fault Sean.
How can you even call yourself a man anymore?
You forced my hand Sean and I did what I had to do, I had to put these silly little Sean Jackson words to rest. You thought I was an easy touch but Sean, you now know I'm no easy touch, I'm not a paper champion, I'm not a transitional champion, I'm here to hold this belt and show you exactly what I can do, I'm here to show you that I'm gonna be the best champion there has ever been. This isn't about a pissing contest Sean, this is about me shutting you up once and for all, this is me showing you that your words are pointless. Anything you've ever accused me off in the last two months, will be buried at Blaze of Glory IV.
Buried and forever laid to rest.
Maybe in the future Sean, you should pick your words and actions a whole lot more carefully because I've shown you just what I can do. I've shown you I'm limitless, especially when you yourself started it.
Remember that?
The same show I kicked your arse on and took your title on. You mocked my wife, you mocked my family. Anything you can do Sean, I can do a level above. I've been waiting patiently since that moment Sean, when I watched your stomach turning, head shaking attempt at mocking my family. I knew at that point that someday, I will show you how it should have been done. Why mock with sigh inducing comedy when you can go get yours hands dirty. I did just that by putting my hands on your wife, and trust me, touching that thing, took me a long time to scrub the filth off my hands.
Whatever you think you can do, I can do better.
You think you can spend weeks playing games, good for you, hope that was fun for you, but I bettered it in one night. I bettered it with one move and poor little Sean Jackson had to sit there and think about all the time he's wasted trying to get in my head.
Don't try that in the future, you now know you won't like what you see.
You've tried to be in my head, you must have seen the way this one is gonna go Sean. You know that this is gonna be an easy win for me. I'm not the same guy I was when Matheson carried you to victory. I'm now sharper, I'm now stronger and I'm gonna make you feel something you've never felt before from your pedestal you placed yourself on many years ago.
I'm gonna make you feel proud.
Not proud of yourself, but proud to be in a match with me, the man who will die for the cause of being the SCW World Heavyweight champion. I am gonna make this a match that will be remembered for the decades, and you will feel proud to have been involved, even if you will end up on the losing streak.
You will be falling faster than Madonna at the Brit Awards....
....English people will get that one, but it's true. Your reputation will fall, your image will fall, you will melt away in my shadow. There's nothing at all you can do about that Sean. It's simply the way it's gonna go.
Don't fight it, it will only make it much more painful for you.
Just accept it Sean, just do what your wife does and take it like a man.
Am I getting through to the pair of you yet? Is it sinking in that you're both in a match you simply can not win, you're both in a match where you have no chance at all? The sooner you accept it, the less painful it will be. Start to nod and accept, get yourself prepared for disappointment, make yourself learn now that this is a game you just can't win. This is a game you never could from the start.
You've been played and it's time for this winner to collect his just rewards.
Matheson, Jackson, you two truly have a less than zero chance of winning this game, to the victor goes the spoils, and I will enjoy each and every one of those spoils.
May God have mercy on your soul....
....Cause I will not!
