I AM HEADLING CLIMAX CONTROL 419 AGAINST FINN WHELAN
Narrator: Before I came on camera to give you lead-in comments for Climax Control 419 I received a call from Bill Barnhart. He told me he has been assigned to the Main Event at Climax Control 419 against Finn Whelan who is the current Heavyweight Champion. The Championship is not on the line in this match so Finn doesn’t have to worry if he loses to Bill Barnhart. This should prove to be an interesting match as Bill and Finn have faced off before. With that said I now turn you over to Bill Barnhart to get his comments on this upcoming match.
The camera shot shifts from being focused on the Narrator to a shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart sitting on the couch, along with their English Bulldog Iris, at their hotel room which is located near the Billy Graham Civic Auditorium in San Francisco, California. Bill is casually dressed in blue jeans and a black pullover shirt and Bea is also wearing blue jeans but she has a white pullover shirt on. Iris doesn’t have any clothing items on but we do notice that Iris is focused on her laptop computer and we make the assumption that she is having a video chat with her fiancé Pete the Cactus who is owned by Senor Vinnie.
Bill: Thanks to everyone who tuned in to hear my comments on my upcoming Main Event match against Finn Whelan at Climax Control 419. Iris has been cleared to travel with us so she will not be left at home a lot of the time. Also since I grew up in Oakland, California, I am familiar with the Billy Graham Civic Auditorium in San Francisco, California. Me and my father went to wrestling events at numerous places in the San Francisco Bay Area but our favorite was at the Cow Palace in San Francisco. Actually the Cow Palance is located in Daly City which is part of San Francisco. Bea before I launch into my comments on my upcoming match against Finn Whelan do you have any opening comments?
Bea: I felt the match that Felix Hernandez had with Senor Vinnie was a good one. Vinnie is a difficult wrestler to get a win over him but Felix did the best he could. The best part of the match was at the end the two shook hands, hugged each other, and they remain friends. That’s how things are supposed to work.
Bill: Good luck on that item Bea. Some of our Referees are either blind, or pretending to be blind, as they sure miss a lot of calls. Oh well. . .we just have to continue to step into the ring and perform in our matches and let Management deal with Referees who fail to meet the standards for fairly calling matches.
Bill walks over to his Keurig coffee maker and he brews himself a cup. When the coffee is done Bill sips the coffee as he returns to the couch and he takes another sip of coffee before continuing with his comments.
Bill: For the benefit of the viewers, and for the benefit of Finn Whelan, let me give you the information on how we match up against each other. I come into this match at 6 feet 4 inches and 240 pounds. Finn comes into this match at 6 feet 4 inches and 201 pounds. Finn for you to be giving up 39 pounds of weight to me may seem insignificant to you, but when I do the math the weight advantage I have over you does factor into our match. For you to have to maneuver me with those extra 39 pounds of weight will wear you down quickly. Unless the Referee assigned to our match cheats on your behalf the only outcome for our match is that I win and you lose.
Bill pauses his comments then he looks over at Bea.
Bill: Bea? How come you are being quiet over there? I figured you would make comments considering you are serving as my Manager.
Bea: I have things to say but you are doing such a great job with your comments I didn’t want to interrupt you. Please continue and I will jump in when I feel I want to.
Bill: Okay. I will continue addressing Finn Whelen then. So, Finn, I decided to take the first letters of your name and see what words I could come up with to help describe you to fans who may not know you as well as I do.
Bea: Oooooo. . .that sounds interesting.
Bill: Before I do the name word association I want to tell Finn that although he did win the Heavyweight Championship he won it against Goth who was getting ready to retire. Not sure if that is a reason for you to brag about that win. With that comment out of the way, Finn, here is a list of words that describe you using the first letters of your name.
Bill has the camera person tell the studio to put the graphic on the screen. The graphic pops up and we start reading it.
FINN WHELAN
Fake
Idiotic
Nothing
Nobody
Worthless
Helpless
Easy (to defeat you)
Lliar
Angry
Nasty
Bill: You can talk all the smack you want Finn. I don’t give a damn what you think of me. I don’t give a damn how much you hate me. I don’t give a damn that you are the current Heavyweight Champion. But, Finn, there is one good thing about our match that works in your favor. When I defeat you, since the Championship is not on the line, you take the defeat I hand you but you remain as the Heavyweight Champion.
Bill informs the camera person that he will take a short break and when he returns he and Bea want to present additional information for the benefit of the other wrestlers and fans and then they will continue to talk about Bill’s match against Finn Whelan.
After the short break Bill and Bea appear on camera again. The camera person pans their camera over to get a shot of Iris on her computer talking with her boyfriend, Pete The Cactus, who is the partner of Senor Vinnie.
Bill: First I want to mention that I enjoyed the match between my friends Felix Hernandez and Senor Vinnie. Vinnie was honestly to large of an opponent for Felix but Felix did well but that submission hold by Vinnie caused Felix to submit in the match. Next I want to inform everyone that I am looking forward to the Elimination Chamber that will be taking place soon. Both me and Vinnie are involved in the match so I expect it to be a tough, brutal, and fun match. Lastly I want to let everyone know that Iris, our English Bulldog, is dating Pete The Cactus again. I am enjoying Iris and her friendship with Pete.
When Bill mentions the name of Iris and Pete The Cactus Iris perks up and looks over at Daddy Bill and Mommy Bea then she returns to her video call with Pete The Cactus.
Bea: I like seeing Vinnie and Iris together again. Good thing Iris is fixed and cannot have babies as those would be some strange hybrid babies consisting of part English Bulldog and part Cactus.
Bill and Bea cannot help laugh at the thought of hybrid babies that are part Cactus and part English Bulldog.
Bill informs the camera person that he and Bea will make closing comments. The camera person focuses on Bill and Bea and they begin their closing comments.
Bill: Well, Finn, in a short time we will be the Main Event for Climax Control 419. This Main Event is going to be a good match. I know you believe you will come into our match and win but I don’t see that happening. I have wrestled some of the most evil and demonic wrestlers ever known in the sport of wrestling. I have wrestled larger wrestlers than me and came out well. As for you, Finn, I know you have held a few Championships in Sin City Wrestling but I have held several Championships also, You know I can easily defeat you if you do not cheat and if our Referee calls a fair match. When all the items pertaining to a wrestling match are equal then I will easily win. However, Finn, if you decide to violate the rules of our match, and you go into cheating mode, then I will have no choice but to destroy you. We have to wait until Climax Control 419 to find out which of us exits the ring as the winner.
Bill and Bea inform the camera person that they are done with their comments for Bill’s upcoming match and the camera person can stop broadcasting. The camera person cuts their camera feed and our screen goes dark.
