Author Topic: "Trust And Faith" (From a Sister's Perspective)  (Read 575 times)

Myra Rivers

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"Trust And Faith" (From a Sister's Perspective)
« on: February 18, 2022, 11:36:35 PM »
“Myra is someone I have always admired as a big sister. But, being a part of her journey for the last 14 years has had its fair share of ups and downs. It’s the most insane roller coaster I’ve ever been part of. At least the ride is going up… especially after I watched her win last Sunday…”

2-13-2022

“One down…” Myra reminded me as I sat on the couch with my fiance Scotty watching Climax Control. “...Adrianna, I’ve got to be honest with you. I think Max Burke is going to be a better partner than Mac.”

“I’m inclined to agree with that. I mean, Max wouldn’t throw you under the bus next year calling his new partner a ‘major upgrade’ or anything…” I said with a tone of annoyance in my voice. Myra just laughed it off.

“Don’t let what other people say about me get to you. I’ll call you right back. I have to do something…”

“Okay…” I said as Myra hung up.

“I’m happy to see Myra do so well…” Scotty said. But, before I could respond, I saw Todd Williams say some nasty things about my sister. Fury poured through my veins while Scotty sighed.

“Turn that shit off…” I said to him. He was surprised, but complied.

“REALLY?” I said, my anger increasing and tears of rage starting to water my eyes. “Here we FUCKING GO AGAIN! Another IDIOT that wants to talk down to her. FOR WHAT? What the FUCK has Myra ever done to him?”

“Adrianna, it’s not a big deal…”

“It iS a big deal!” I said as I stood up. “Whether it’s Ruby, Amber and now HIM… I’m SO tired of people ALWAYS talking garbage about Myra! ALL THE TIME! SOMEONE has to talk down about her like that! I’m sorry Scotty, but you know how much I care about her! I want to see her win that world title in SCW SO BAD…”

I paused as the angry tears flowed down my face.

“It would mean EVERYTHING to me if she does… for our sisterhood. If she doesn’t win…”

“Don’t say that…”

"I worry about her if she doesn't win the tournament. I know she's been so much stronger lately, but all it takes is ONE thing to go wrong and she regresses back into beating herself up."

“You have to have faith and trust in her…”

"I DO"

“Why are you worrying about her falling short?"

 "Because last year's tournament was hard for me too seeing a loudmouth BITCH like Ruby win and for her to deal with ANOTHER ONE? I'm so tired of seeing her suffer because of falling short..."

“You’ve lost faith in her, Adrianna…”

“...I have not…”

“Whatever it is that has caused you to lose faith, you’ve got to get it back…” Scotty said as he left me alone. I wiped away my tears of frustration at that point.

"I know how bad my sister wants this and I know she's so determined to get it done this year, but I'm so scared for her. If she loses, she proves that fuckhead Todd Williams right and I don't WANT to see that son of a bitch GLOAT... not like Amber did... twice. God, that hurt. My faith in Myra has been shaken since she lost to Amber on her birthday..."

As I waited for Myra to call me back, I began to reflect…

7-18-2021

“Come on sis…” I said from my hospital bed obviously still in so much pain from my life threatening accident a couple of weeks prior. Watching her wrestle Amber in that title for title match made me so nervous especially knowing that she was doing that for me. “I believe in you, Myra. You, winning this match for me, on your birthday and finally overcoming your demons and being a world champion again. There’s no other way this can end…”

I gripped my pillow tight as the match was heading toward its final stages. Even though Amber was in control, I was not giving up.

“...I know you can do this, Myra. I’ve given you all of my strength. You can do this…”

Then Amber nailed Myra with her finisher and went for the cover…

“Kick out, kick out, kick out, kick out…” I pleaded as the referee dropped to make the count.

One…

“Come on sis… kick out…”

Two…

“KICK OUT!!!!”

Three…

My heart immediately sank and I went completely numb. Myra had dedicated that match to me. She did everything that she could to fight for me and to let me know that she was going to win that world title and lift my spirits. But internally? I was so devastated. Watching Amber celebrate gave me a serious punch in the gut. I wasn’t just crying, I was mortified. The pain in my body from the accident paled in comparison to my broken heart.

“She let me down…” I said in shock…

"I felt like Myra was about to go into a decline because she's always had a tendency to go on a very deep decline after she does amazing for a hell of a long stretch. When her 350 day reign ended, I was feeling dread... thinking that a sharp decline was on the way. I didn't believe that she'd overcome that…

Two months later?

I braced for the worst…”

9-12-2021

Violent Conduct.

Scotty and I were on the couch. Scotty was into it, pulling for Myra to his heart’s content. But me? I was feeling empty. As much as I wanted to root for my sister to beat Amber, I felt this incredible burden on the back of my mind.

“Have faith…” he said to me.

“...she lost last time…”

“It doesn’t mean she’s going to lose this time”

“You do realize that even now, Myra is fighting for YOU, right?”

“She FAILED last time, hon…” I said, with the memories of Summer XXXtreme bringing down my mood. “Over her career, Myra has let me down so many times, especially in spotlight matches like this. Summer XXXtreme was her worst letdown yet. She promised she’d win for me and she didn’t.”

“She didn’t let you down and even if she did, we both know that she didn’t mean to…”

“Scotty, I’m sorry. But I can’t trust her to win this time. She’s going to lose because Amber… maybe she’s right. Maybe she’ll never be enough…”

“Adrianna…”

“No Scotty, I’m serious. Why should I have faith when she let me down when I needed her? It’s not just Summer XXXtreme, it's happened many times over the years. It seems like her destiny is always to be miserable and second best to someone else. PRW with Luciana before her then-retirement match, UWA MANY times in that political hellhole, and now in SCW with Amber Ryan. Scotty, she’s not going to win…”

“You’ve got to believe in her…”

“How can I when she doesn’t even believe in herself? You could see it in her body language that she doesn’t even think she can win. Why would she have faith in herself when she ALWAYS loses in big match situations like two months ago and that fucking tournament to Ruby Steele?”

Scotty sighed, ignoring me as we watched the match.

Then the ring exploded.

“MYRA!!!!!! OH MY GOD MYRA!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!”

My heart raced with horror seeing Myra go through that explosion. My hands were shaking. I could barely breathe. I was panicking on the inside when the smoke and the rubble had cleared. I wasn’t even crying at this point. But I was still severely disappointed that the inevitable had happened. I had to deal with seeing Amber celebrate again… and once more… feeling my trust and faith in Myra shattering when she let me down again…

"I’ve held onto previous letdowns from her and AGAINST HER for far too long. Scotty is so right. Maybe Myra has failed in the big moments because I don't trust in her enough and I'm always worried about her falling short and letting me down…"

Present Day

These words stuck with me when Myra FaceTime called me back. I answered the phone and Myra suddenly saw the worry on my face.

“Everything okay?” she asked me.

I replied by shaking my head.

“What’s wrong?”

“Did you see that SHIT that Todd Williams said about you?” I asked with anger in my voice.

“Adrianna, I did, but…”

“Don’t tell me it’s not a big deal! You lost in last year’s tournament to the same type of IDIOT in Ruby Steele! UGH, if you face him and you and Max end up LOSING to that fucking guy then maybe you’re just not destined to win the world title and you’re ALWAYS going to be second best to FUCKING IDIOTS LIKE HIM!”

I immediately gasped with regret, especially when Myra’s jaw dropped in shock.

“...you don’t trust me…” she began. “You don’t trust that if my team faces him, that we’d shut him up?”

“Myra… I’m sorry. I don’t.”

Myra went numb.

“I don’t trust you the way I should and I dread seeing you fail… especially against someone like that.”

“Adrianna, you have to trust me…” she said with a disappointed sigh. “I’ve always felt like you were on my team. If I’m going to win this year and achieve my destiny, I need you to trust me. That’s what being part of a team is about: trust. I know that last year, I let you down with the finals and the two Amber matches, but it’s in the past. You of all people should know how hard I’ve worked to bring the Rebellious Vixen back and be stronger and better than ever. Did winning my world title in Orlando really do so little for you?”

I sighed with guilt.

“Adrianna, what more do I have to do to get you to trust me? I can’t win the tournament this year without you.”


“I’m sorry. Todd’s words got to me.It’s so unfair that people like him talk down to you that way and I’m so sick of others doubting you when you wrestle with the purest of all hearts in SCW and you don’t deserve such scorn and hatred at all…”

“Adrianna…” Myra says with a composed sigh. “Think about some of the doubts I’ve silenced since the Rebellious Vixen came back… and you’ll realize why you should have better faith in me than that…”

I began to do just that…

HIgh Stakes

Myra and I were in the back of a limo on our way to High Stakes. Myra’s demeanor was bright, but I was so angry!

“BE BETTER! BE BETTER! BE BETTER!” I said in a mocking tone of voice, expressing my anger over Jessie’s comments following Myra’s loss to Roxi. “What a BITCH…”

Myra didn’t say anything.

“Oh and for HER of all people to BELITTLE YOU for losing to Roxi comparing you to someone fresh out of wrestling school. FUCK JESSIE! I don’t even want to THINK about how HORRIBLE you’re going to have it if you lose to her… it worries me so much. For you to have this breakthrough and…”

“She’s not winning tonight…” Myra assured me, despite the fact that I really wasn’t believing it. “Trust me…”

I sighed, more annoyed than anything that Myra had to prove herself all over again. I could feel a sense of dread and a lack of faith pour through me with my heart and soul expecting Myra to let me down all over again.

Later…

“GOOD! I am SO glad you proved her wrong…” I gushed as we were back in our hotel room. “You SILENCED Jessie and you silenced ALL the haters! Those vultures that were waiting for you to fail against Jessie and have yet another thing to laugh at you about can starve to death!”

“I told you that the Rebellious Vixen WAS going to pull through…” Myra said with a smile on her face, exuding a confidence that I hadn’t felt from her in YEARS. “I never doubted for a second that I was going to end Jessie’s streak and the Bombshells division saw a Myra Rivers that they had never seen before… one that YOU more than everyone else know all about.”

I smiled and chuckled, though it was a bit of a nervous chuckle as deep down, I was worried about how Myra would handle her next loss or failure.

“I’m so happy for you, Myra. I hope that this is a new, better beginning.”

“Hope?” Myra asked with confusion. “This IS a new beginning, Adrianna!”

“Right, of course… sorry. Hope doesn’t accomplish anything. I should know that.”

I paused, letting out a relieved sigh that caused Myra to have concern on her face.

“I’m sorry, it’s been a long few months you know…”

“It’s okay, sis! It’s only going to get better from here…” she responded as she pulled me into an embrace…

11-19-2021

Myra and I were shopping at a Target two days prior to her having to face Roxi Johnson only two weeks removed from her High Stakes win over Jessie. Wrestling was the last thing on our minds… until a group of gamers came up to Myra and I.

“Hey! You’re Myra Rivers!” one of the gamers said.

“Yeah, I am! What can I do for you?”

“Myra, you are one awesome wrestler…” another of the gamers said. “What you did against Jessie was pretty cool. However, you’re not beating Roxi this Sunday…”

“Excuse me…” I said with anger in my voice.

“I mean… you’re facing one-thirds of the High Stakes main event only two weeks removed from facing Jessie in a brutal match. You’re too hurt to make a dent against someone REALLY motivated like Roxi…”

“Yeah, and you also tumbled down the ladder when she beat you the last time you wrestled her. No offense, but… beating Jessie doesn’t make you a top contender again.”

“Why don’t you just all FUCK OFF?” I screamed at the fans.

“Adrianna! REALLY?”

“Wow… what a bitch…” one of the gamers said as the group left.

“Fucking DISRESPECFUL walking up to you and telling you you’re going to lose…”

“They’re just words, Adri. I’m fine. Have faith in me okay?”

I nodded and let out a sigh as we continued our Target shopping…


CC316

“...what?” I said with a hushed, shocked voice when I was backstage at that event seeing Myra draw with the same woman that had beaten her only a month prior. “She proved those stupid fans at Target WRONG! She didn’t win, but everyone was up Roxi’s ass coming into this match and Roxi didn’t even win!”

The show had cut to a backstage segment and I had turned off the monitor soaking everything in at that point.

“If Myra was the Myra that lost to Amber twice, Roxi beats her again. Myra went through HELL against Jessie just two weeks ago and despite that she STILL forced a DRAW against someone that just main evented High Stakes? Maybe this WILL be different... maybe that 'decline' I feared isn't happening after all…

While to this day, my faith in Myra isn’t where it should be, I will be the first to admit that seeing her draw against Roxi under these circumstances had me coming around at last…

Present Day

“Myra… you’re right. I DO need to trust you. You’ve shown me so much since September, but I've been so burdened by pain and disappointment that I’ve always braced for the worst. You’ve grown so much and… I believe that’s going to help you in the tournament this year…”

Myra smiled, happy that I was finally coming around.

“Whatever Todd said? Don’t stress over them. I’m not. The way I see it? If Max and I ever have to deal with him, we will. Todd is nothing special to me, Adrianna. You and I don’t need to give him the power of letting him know that he got to us. Todd is just another cookie cutter doubter that can’t get in my way no matter what, even if we DO face him and NOT win. He’s Jayson lite to me… and you remember how I shut HIM up when he went through that flaming table on my way to my Festivus title. When you had your accident, I had all the faith in the world in you that you were going to survive. If I’m going to win this tournament, I need you to have that same faith and trust in me and I need US to be a team like we’ve always been.”

Tears of guilt filled my eyes, but a deep breath stopped them from falling.

“You’re right, Myra. I should and I WILL trust in you better. I’m here for you on the journey to your destiny no matter what, win or lose. I’m sorry that I always found an excuse to lose faith in you.”

“I forgive you…” Myra said with a smile. “You and I are ALWAYS going to be a team and the support you’ve had for me this year has always kept me going and has made me such a stronger wrestler and person.”

“I believe in you, Myra. You’re going to win that tournament and I’m NOT going to let my faith in you waver. I TRUST YOU! I’ll be there for you every step of the way. From now on? I’m putting the letdowns behind me and I’m your teammate all the way again! You’re going to silence EVERY doubter your way and I will NEVER lose faith in you again, I PROMISE!”

“Thank you Adrianna…” Myra said with joy in her eyes. “Now I know Max and I are going to erase all doubt and win the tournament. I love you sis! Take care!”

“I love you too…” I said, before Myra ended the video call and left me feeling happy and excited that we were a real team again…

2-18-2022

Myra and I sat on my couch and we were both embracing each other when the light came on. We broke our embrace and Myra nodded at me with a smile to kick off her thoughts of the challenge ahead.

“I know there are people in SCW that STILL want to doubt and criticize Myra. I know people like Mac Bane put her down when he talked up Mikah as a huge upgrade. I know my sister has fallen short in the past in big situations last year, but she has grown so much. You can see it when she wrestles that she is the happiest and most confident that she has ever been and what I saw last week was her embracing the Blast from the Past challenge again and wrestling BETTER than she did last year. You can doubt Myra, you can hate her, but you can’t shake her. Doubt her all you want, but WHEN she becomes SCW Bombshells World champion, she WILL prove you wrong… not like she has anything to prove to YOU TODD WILLIAMS, YOU SELF-ABSORBED, DICKLESS PIECE OF SHIT!”

Myra’s jaw dropped in shock…

“FUCKING ASSHOLE! Who the FUCK do you think you are coming back and acting like you’re the fuckng shit TRASHING my sister at every turn for NO reason when she has done NOTHING to you, you WORTHLESS MOTHERFUCKER! If trashing MYRA wasn’t bad enough, you had to bury your own teammate! Yeah, you’re a REAL MAN, aren’t you? The only reason why you come back and pick on Myra so RANDOMLY is because you have a cock SO SMALL that it makes a BB gun pellet look like a BOWLING BALL in comparison and because you’re FUCKING INSECURE WITH YOURSELF that you want to bring others down with you, especially Myra! Get the FUCK over yourself, you BALL OF ELEPHANT DUNG! You try to BURY MYRA only to make yourself feel better because there is NOTHING SPECIAL about you… NOTHING! I am EMBARRASSED for your partner that…

Myra suddenly covers my mouth, causing me to calm down.

“I’ll take it from here…” Myra says with a smile as I take a deep breath to calm down and let her do her thing. “Adrianna here was ‘colorful’ with her language, but despite my failures from last year and despite the fact that people like Todd Williams want to talk shit and bring me down, she, among so many other people, have the faith and the trust in me to overcome all of that and force people like Todd to eat crow. Most importantly, my partner Max Burke has the same trust and the same faith in me as I do in him and last week, that trust in each other was proven in spades when we went out there and we beat Miles and Audrey… great competitors, but you could tell that they just weren’t jiving the way we were. TRUST in your partner is what is going to win the day in this tournament Todd and Alanah and I hate to say it Alanah, because you’re the better of the two people in that team, but last Sunday, when Todd talked about ‘carrying you’, he all but buried you and let you know that he has no interest in you and he has no interest in being a team player. How the hell are you going to trust him after that, Alanah? I know that you’re not going to stand for it and on social media you even floated the possibility of not showing up at all. Todd’s stupid words, which by the way was a good comedy hour for me to the point where I’m not even going to BOTHER directly addressing his lunacy, sunk your team before this match even started.

Alaha, I’m sorry. I really am. I do feel bad for you and everything, but in that ring, business has to be taken care of as you saw from me personally when ONE Russow was taken out of this tournament. Tell me, Alanah. You don’t trust Todd. After his tirade on Sunday, I don’t blame you for having no trust or faith in him. HOW are you going to manage this, Alanah? You have a teammate that is clearly looking out for himself and you’re already going into this match pissed off with your team chemistry all but ruined. Todd is the ANCHOR of your team and that’s without going into the fact that you don’t even have that much experience yourself. You talked about having the confidence to win this tournament going into round one, but where is that confidence now? On top of the fact that you have to go through me, which many Bombshells will tell you is a tall order to begin with, you have to do it with a partner that has no faith in you at all. Trust me Alanah, I’ve been down that road before where I’ve had someone in this business that never had faith in me. I grew up with my father telling me I’d never amount to anything. I’d have people in this business run me down so many times and yeah, it IS a confidence killer. You’re put in this unfair situation where your confidence is BRUISED because of what your own partner said. You already know that as a TEAMMATE, he’s NOT going to hold up his end of the bargain while I know that my partner is going to be doing just that not just because I have faith in him, because last week, he PINNED Miles and SHOWED that he was holding up his end of the bargain.

Take it from someone who has had her closest friends and family lose faith in her at one point… when someone you rely on has no faith in you? It’s a confidence killer. Max and I are a well oiled machine while you and Todd are pretty much going to implode. To be a champion, you’ve not only got to trust those around you, not only do you have to have those around you have faith in you, you have to trust in YOURSELF and your abilities more than anyone else is going to because nobody is going to believe in you if you don’t believe in yourself. Not to put my sister here under the bus or anything, but when I was going through hell last year and when it seemed like I was falling, she lost faith in me and I don’t blame her for that because I reached a point n Violent Conduct where I lost trust in all of my abilities too. It cost me my match against Roxi, it cost me those two matches against Amber, it cost me the tournament last year. I come in here trusting my abilities now more than ever. Do YOU trust those abilities that YOU possess, Alanah? You talked a pretty decent game coming into round one, but if it were ME, personally, having the type of partner that you have, and if I had the experience in SCW, or lack thereof anyway, that you do, I’d be doubting myself a TON. If my partner had no faith in me, I’d be questioning my own abilities and wondering if it’s even WORTH showing up… just like YOU did on social media. You know coming into this thing that facing me in and of itself is a tall order, but with THAT on top of it? Hell, you can’t even limit your doubts to just your own partner coming into this match…

I’m SURE that at some point during this last week, you have thought about this encounter that you and I are going to have and you have given some thought and consideration to the fact that I’ve taken down one Russow already. Somewhere deep in there, you are wondering how you’re going to beat me when Audrey couldn’t. And because it’s a natural thing, I am pretty damn sure that coming into this thing, the whole “Russow family curse” when it comes to Sin City Wrestling and the fact that the last name Russow hasn’t been all that successful in this company is weighing on you too. Factor all of that, and forget your partner. I can’t even imagine how with all of those things being a dark cloud over your head how you can have the full faith and confidence in yourself that you are going to advance any further in this tournament. You’re a young lady at the age of 22 just finding your feet. When I was 22, I STILL hadn’t even made the mainstream yet. Take it from someone that was your age once. When I first started out, I doubted myself SO much. I didn’t think I’d be able to do what I’ve done over the course of my career. And hell, I can’t even say that I fully trusted in myself and found my feet in this business until I got to Sin City Wrestling and brought the Rebellious Vixen back. You know how I know you don’t fully trust your abilities yet? Because if you did, you wouldn’t have tweeted me saying you were tempted to walk out of the match over Todd’s comments. You would’ve done what I did, taken it in stride, not let it bother you at all, and do what I am about to do and that’s trust in my ability to take care of business and do what needs to be done…”

“DAMN… she got her good…” I thought to myself as I watched Myra wrap things up…

“I sympathize with you and I completely understand why his comments got to you. But they didn’t bother me one bit nor did I acknowledge them until I had to. I made that same mistake with Ruby Steele and I’m NOT going to make it again with someone like that. I could’ve let Mac calling Mikah an ‘upgrade’ over me bother me last week, but I didn’t. Because at the end of the day, Alanah, it’s all just an opinion that should be worthless to you. You’re not ‘baggage’ and you know that. So why let it bother you at all? TRUST in what YOU can do regardless of what he, or anyone else has to say, THAT is how you become a champion not just in this sport, but in professional wrestling as well. I’m sorry that this week will be the end of your tournament run, Alanah, I’m sorry that you couldn’t have had a better partner that didn’t self-destruct the entire team with his selfishness and with his ego. This week, I will show you what I mean when Max and I put the trust we have in each other as partners, one that FAR exceeds the one your team has, and we pull through to the semifinals of this tournament. With THAT belief, the growing faith I have in myself as a competitor, and with the faith that my loved ones like my sister here have in me, I know in my heart that despite the empty words of your partner, not only will we advance, not only will we win this tournament, but I WILL become SCW Bombshells World Champion whether doubters, haters and critics like it or not!”

“That was inspiring…” I said to Myra as she stood up to turn off the camera. I stood up to meet her as we exchanged a huge hug.

“You’ve grown so much and hearing your words just now makes me feel like you ARE going to win that tournament…”

“Thank you for being on my team and believing in me, Adrianna…” my sister said to me as our embrace continued. “...together, we’re going to conquer all the doubters and reach the top of the mountain… you and me!”

As a sister? Having restored faith in Myra was truly the best feeling!