A dream
“No…, please.”
A soft whisper escapes Goth’s mouth late at night as he and Melissa are sleeping in bed. He is tossing and turning during a nightmare as Melissa is fast asleep and apparently not hearing his soft pleads.
“Please don’t harm her”
His head is tossing and turning, his fingers gripping into the bed sheets for leverage. The painful expression upon his face tells that the dream is really a terrible nightmare. Sweat is pouring from his face as the agony increases. To the point that he ultimately sits up while screaming out.
“NO!!!”
This causes Melissa to wake up as well, looking at Goth with a look of concern upon her face.
“Gerrit?? Are you alright??”
His breathing slowly reduces, but his gaze is endlessly staring ahead of him. Seemingly he is in a trance, causing him not to hear her.
“Gerrit?? I…”
“Huh? Oh, yes. I’m sorry Melissa, I am fine. I just….”
His words trail off in thoughts as his eyes are staring through the darkness of their bedroom. Sighing of relief as he realizes that he is with his girlfriend and not in the realms of his dream.
“Want to talk about it??”
Says her voice of understanding, she had seen this before with him and has grown accustomed to his dreams that seem to be haunting him every now and then. She raises the bed sheets close to her as she lens forward to him. placing her head upon his shoulder as this causes him to turn towards her as he stares into her eyes in the darkness. He lowers his head and sighs.
“I dreamt about….”
He stops midsentence as his thoughts trail off
“Chantal??”
She always knew when he had dreams or had seemingly visions of his now dead wife. The woman that was his manager for so many years, to fans better known as Sapphira. He lowers his head and nods in answer to her question. Causing her to wrap an arm around him as she moves her body closer to his. A gesture that he always appreciated from her.
“It was a memory of her harmed during one of my matches. I….”
He bit his lower lip, stifling his words in agony as he did not wanted to continue into too much painful details
“It’s why I don’t want you or Gerrit Jr. to be present at ringside when I compete. I…”
He had this conversation many of times, he was so happy that she had always agreed with him about not being at ringside for his matches. But that did not stop him from having these dreams. Dreams where she was always targeted by one individual, but someone that in shadows as he did not recognize the individual
“I understand Gerrit, it must have been a terrible memory??”
He nods his head, but deep down inside he was puzzled. Because the memory that came to him in these dreams wasn’t a memory that he could remember. As if it had never happened to him and her, or at least not that he could remember. But he preferred to have this withheld from her, not wanting her to be worried anymore than she already was.
“Thank you my dear, but I’m fine. We should try to fall asleep though”
He suggests as he kisses her forehead before both fall down on their bed in a gentle embrace. The two share a few moments of gentle whispers, telling each other how much they love each other before they fall asleep. Or at least that is what Goth is trying to convince Melissa in doing so as he stares at the ceiling with worries on his mind. Wondering what the dream had meant. He had hoped after a few times that this dream would fade as many other dreams before this one has done in the past. But why not this one?? Is it a warning for things to come??
“That can’t be, I will not allow this to happen”
He whispers in silence before finally closing his eyes and attempting to finally fall asleep
Time to revisit the past
“Alexei”
A whisper escapes the lips of the man that on a past show of Sin City’s Wrestling Climax Control pinned Austin James Mercer to become co holder of the mixed tag team titles. Goth is surrounded by darkness, only a candle is surrounding him as his long hair is hanging primarily before his face.
“I know it’s bad luck calling out the demons from your past, but I guess we are at an age that it no longer matters does it big man?”
A soft snicker escapes his lips that is visible through the thick strands of hair. The thick bushy hairs of his beard is visible as he is moving his jaw up and down in soft unhearable whispers
“I wonder if you could hear my words from whatever black hole that you are currently residing, but I don’t care. You need to be praised old foe, for all the blood shed that you and I have spilled”
He lowers his head for a moment, a humming sound vibrates from his mouth as if he is in a trance of sorts.
“Alexei… I know I was never in that inner circle of close friends…. Or should ii say freaks that you kept closer to yourself than some fleabags do. But reality is a factual non existing entity isn’t it?? Because the reality is only what we make of it… The only difference between us is that you started it…. and I finished it… Something that I know to this very day you could not stand…..”
“Too Bad big fella”
He slowly raises his head, causing some of his hair to fall to the sides. The light of the candle causes the shadows surrounding his eyes to become more visible as if you are staring at the base of a skull… only difference is obviously the eyes of Goth that stares a hole in your soul.
“I wished time had stood still for a moment, granting me a time warp even if it is merely to stare upwards to your scarred face. I know it is politically incorrect to gesture your existence as a past tense…. Because nobody can take away our pain can’t they??”
Goth softly bites upon his lower lip, causing it to turn as pale as his own skin in the light of the candle. Slowly the tension upon the bite lessens and a smile re emerges.
“I know it must sound like jibberish to all of you, but I wasn’t planning to keep a time line in order for me to explain it all. Because to me this is a part of my life that is upon a know it all basis… And for me it is simply to proclaim to the world that we live in today is that you will not be able to understand it all…. Not even you Romano.”
He lowers his head after mentioning the name of the current Internet champion
“Agostino…. Romano… a name that like mine can create a suggestive image in your mind without even having seen the culprit. And then there’s always two options of what the reality can grant you… Whether it is confirmation or disappointment… two sides that are so closely bound to each other wouldn’t you agree Alexei??”
Goth turns his head sideways for a moment, as if he has heard a reaction. He sighs and nods his head as if to confirm whatever it is that inside his head is heard.
“It’s so complicated to understand the constant messages that play through your brain, sending signals to every fiber of your body to either make you move,k think, eat or drink or even sleep. And even to see reality through a different set of eyes, something that I am sure you have yet to experience isn’t it Agostino??”
“The Italian heritage in our world is often been a key element in our existence in so many ways… As if it is nearly shoved down our throats for us to simply accept it and like it…. Just like I had to endure YOU Alexei… Sadly for you I ultimately woke up and your miracle man essence faded“
He smiles for a moment, closes his eyes as he leans his head back against the wall that is behind him. softly sighing out breaths
“I'm looking for a miracle man that tells me no lies. I'm looking for a miracle man who's not in disguise”
There’s a pause
“Forgive me for uttering a few sentences of the song Miracle Man from Ozzy Osbourne. But to me it holds so much layers concerning the man of my past and you Argento… a young man that is still a future goal…, only to be altered in something of the past that I have to endure to move on. Like I did to Austin James Mercer on Climax Control recently…, but I wonder if you truly undersand”
“When it comes down to lies and disguises, I know you ultimately ended up to be a fragment of my past imagination Alexei… or should I just keep it simple and name you Jaymz as I have always done before?? I would ask for forgiveness if there was an essence somewhere deep hidden inside your gut that would grant me forgiveness. But deep down inside I know you are incapable of doing so isn’t it Big Man?? Because in the past I attempted so desperately to find a world without lies and disguises… because I couldn’t stand my life anymore… But it was nothing more than a desperation attempt to escape reality… that all that happened to me and by those who did the painful things was the truth I tried to escape from”
“I hope you are still paying attention Argento? Because soon I shall attempt to seek the answers that I shall know prior to this all that it shall never come.”
His gaze slowly turns towards the camera, we see the shadow fall upon his face as the flame causes all of this.
“A three time Internet champion, a feat that I am myself applauding my friend. A title that I once had held, beating Lord Raab in a heated confrontation of physicality. Something that I am aware shall not happen to us most lightly. As they often say that speed kills?? I wonder my Italian friend, what is your perspective upon this all? No don’t tell me, it is an honour and privilege to hold upon a championship for the third time as many before you have held it as well?? or the mere emotional statement that you did it for the fans, the people that always believed in you… and ultimately to silence those that doubted you?? That said that the prior two times were nothing more than a mere fluke??”
“Whatever the reasoning of it all is that I cannot judge you… nor will I upon yourself as champion. Because just like yours truly you did succeed,k you did do something that many out there thought it was impossible. As if a dream came true isn’t it?? And now? Now you are in a main event match against one half of the mixed tag team champions. Just imagine how things quickly change in such a short time”
I do too was someone that was told explicitly that I could not do what I have done. I was also told that it was unthinkable that an old man amongst the likes of hall of fame unlikely duo would beat the seemingly unbeatable foes. How htigns ultimately end up being nothing more than a fairy tale finally reaching its climatic end… or just to quote a line from Silent Lucidity…”Or has it just Begun?”
A small chuckle emerges upon his face, showing a change from his calculated face that he had been upholding
“Oh Alexei…, why am I forced to uphold this sharade?? Why do I feel the need not to mentally break down this…, this opponent? The man that I need to acknowledge as the carrier of one of the many titles that I have held in this organization as serious?? And for some reason it troubles me??”
He clutches his head with both hands, suddenloy shaking his head wildly while muttering something that is not being able to be overheard by the microphone.
“Forgive me my Italian friend, or better yet… just forget that I asked this of you. Instead I will ask of you to understand, understanding of the measure of humility that I will bring down upon you in this one on one confrontation between two champions. Humility that will hurt me even more than that it shall hurt you… and you know why my dirt bike driving friend??”
It’s quite obvious my friend, it’s merely the fact that you need to be taught.. no educated upon what it means to hold a belt and then to know and feel whether you deserve to wear it.”
A moment of silence
“And I know, I know well that there are no championship obligations to be uphold in our confrontation. Because I would alter the oh so well deserved result that you endured such a beating that you will understand why… WHY I should be more endured more highly as champion as yours truly.”
“Are these harsh words young Italian friend? Tough luck is what makes and breaks careers in an instance. Something I am very well soawre off that if you had faced Jaymz one on one or in tag team comfrontations. That your head would still be spinning in the corner of the TT in Assen to name a legendary motorbike circuit that bikers enjoy visiting.”
A smile emerges upon his face
“Oh yes I know Romano, I know fully to the point that there is no excuse. I will take that step inside that squared circle and take away any possible thought of you posing any kind of threat to me. Because I will make sure that you ultimately have to be grounded upon the six sided ring. Promising you that I shall take down a body part and work over it until you realize that seeing stars isn’t just a romantic feature for any lovely young lady that is on your whatsapp list of casualties that would make the arrow wheeling cupid wonder how often do you need to be struck before someone will ever notice you?? It’s just a sign of mere pity upon their part to take your face off the concrete after I am through with you.”
“It’s nothing personal Romano, it’s just how I work. How I educate and touch the lives of many by harming those who are deservingly so to be harmed by these hands”
Goth reaches out with his hands to the camera
“Can you tell how often they have shed blood? How often they have put someone through the torture rack so to speak before they have wondered why?? Why they were put in front of me, only to be dropped the moment after?? It’s because I am Goth my dear friend and there’s nothing that you or anyone else can do about it… Until that moment comes Argento…, until that moment comes…”
