Jessie had been a busy woman of late, not only had she set her eyes on winning the World Bombshell Championship from Amber Ryan, but she had also laid claim to the vacant Bombshell internet Championship! And despite Christian Underwood saying otherwise, Jessie wasn’t out of the tournament but that didn’t mean she had it easy! Her opponent in the first round was Andrea Hernandez, the haughty Bombshell was on a long winning streak and was aiming to add the Internet Title to her list of accomplishments, but Jessie wasn’t about to make it easy for her, can Jessie win?
Backstage at Climax Control 308, San Jose, California
Sunday the 15th of August 2021, 18:00pm
I think we all know where I’d rather be.
Over in England, there’s a metal music festival called Bloodstock, anyone who’s been following my career since I debuted in SCW nine years ago knows that I’ve been making yearly trips to Derbyshire for Bloodstock, hell I had my fucking wedding on the festival grounds.
I’ll give you three guesses as to what’s keeping me here in San Jose, and first two don’t count!
Still, being cooped up in the US due to the Covid-19 Pandemic does have its advantages, for example I get to use this opportunity to scout out my competition in this tournament as the first round happens, as opposed to catching the replay once I’m back on American soil as I had done in years passed.
And that’s if Christian’s a man of his word and he pulled me out of the tournament because I staked a claim on the World Bombshell Championship!
“So, Bobbie, Bill, Malachi and Dani are through to the second round of the Internet Title Tournament.” Shane commented as we watched the conclusion to the match between Dani and Keira. “Who could’ve seen that coming?”
“Let’s face it, the only match that was predictable was Malachi’s.” I responded with a shrug as I glanced up from my phone. “I mean really, how the hell did The Troll qualify for this tournament again? Is it a similar situation to when he got that Roulette Title Shot against Alex Jones a while back?”
“You mean he got into the tournament as a favour to his mom?” Jake asked as a stage hand came up to us, next week’s card in hand. “I know we met her on the ship, and we know she’s not only surprisingly hot but a total sweetheart but that can only take him so far? And the male roster will have to riot over this at some point!”
“Just wait until he gets a random World Title Shot, THEN the male roster will riot!” I responded as I shook my head before reading the card. “Oh joy, Candy’s written the match previews for next week! As if her throwing in those stupid stipulations wasn’t bad enough! Bella’s gauntlet is continuing in the opening round against Vebbins, Alex Ruse is taking on Miles Kasey in a Pretty In Pink Tuxedo Internet Title Tournament Match, not a tournament match but Bea Barnhart’s taking on Roxi Johnson in a Four Corner Confetti Match, and no, there’s no explanation of the rules.”
“I think Mark’s going to be begging Christian to come back once we reach Violent Conduct VII at this rate!” Shane scoffed as I went over the rest of the card. “Seriously, this is the Queen for a Day stipulation on steroids!”
“At least Candy hasn’t put herself in a Title Match yet.” I nodded in agreement before I picked up where I left off. “Triple Threat Tournament Match as “The Amazing Headless Man” Brayden Hilton takes on Caleb Storms and Cassian Reed, feel free to start a countdown to Brittany interfering in that match, Mercedes Vargas is getting yet another opportunity she’ll squander as she takes on Johanna Krieger in a first round match and……….” I trailed off as I read the Main Event. “Huh.”
“Is that a good huh or a bad huh?” Jake asked and I tossed the card their way. “Internet Title First Round, you vs. Andrea in the Main Event, have you ever faced her before?”
“Not that I can remember but I’m sure Mercedes will spend more time digging up some old match between us than she will spend promoting her match.” I scoffed as I folded my arms. “Guess Christian doesn’t have as much pull as he thought, either that or Mark overrided him.”
“Or maybe Candy went over both of their heads, she is doing the match previews, maybe she booked the card herself.” Shane offered as an explanation before pausing. “Wouldn’t she still have to run it by Mark though?”
“Probably but frankly? I don’t care either way.” I responded before we looked up just in time to see the Main Event starting. “Andrea rubbed a lot of people the wrong way when she staked a claim to the Internet Title, about time someone shut her up.”
“Didn’t you do the same thing?” Jake asked and I shook my head.
“After Amber vacated the title, Andrea didn’t even wait a day after the Summer XXXTreme cruise before she staked her claim!” I responded before sitting down to watch the match. “If you ask me? It would be pretty fucking karmic if she got knocked out in the first round, and it falls to me to do it!”
Brunch Box, Portland, Oregon
Monday the 16th of August 2021, 12:05pm
See, YouTube is good for some things.
Let me explain, during the pandemic era, I found myself subscribing to a bunch of cooking channels on YouTube and one of them is an English based on called SortedFood, before the pandemic they made the trip down to Portland, Oregon for a series of food based challenges and, well, when we were driving around looking for a place to eat, I recognized this place from that video and insisted that we stop here for lunch.
The boys quickly agreed once I showed them the video!
“So, this is the Brunch Box.” Shane commented once we sat down at our table. “If the food isn’t half as good as it was in the SortedFood video, I’ll be disappointed.”
“I’ve been watching their content for a little over a year, the only time they’ve disappointed me is when the “normals” fuck up in the Pass it On Challenges.” I responded as I looked at the menu. “Or that time Jamie, one of the normals, managed to piss off the country of Spain!”
“I’m almost afraid to ask.” Jake commented as he messaged his forehead with his free hand. “How did he piss off an entire country?”
“He made a paella, and then put it inside a burrito.” I explained and let’s just say that the look on Shane’s face said it all. “It was red wine poached chicken, chorizo………”
“Okay, first off, that’s not a paella, that’s a rice dish with poached chicken! I’m sure it was delicious but still!” Shane interrupted me as he set the menu down. “I don’t want to oversimplify it, but a paella is basically a Spanish Risotto, it’s rice infused with flavours from a stock, usually made with seafood and no chorizo for that matter!” Shane added before he ran a hand through his hair. “And don’t even get me started on putting a Spanish paella in a Mexican Burrito! I swear Jess, if SCW ever goes to Spain once they get back to international travel, I’m buying you an authentic paella from the best restaurant I can find!”
“Is it a bad time to mention that he mispronounced paella, repeatedly?” I asked and Shane just shook his head. “Or that he tried it again in a redemption video from earlier this year?”
“How about we order some food before we give the guy whose Uncle is a professional chef an aneurysm?” Jake quickly chimed in, and we nodded in agreement before a waitress came over to take our orders.
Jessie’s hotel room, Portland, Oregon
Thursday the 19th of August 2021, 18:00pm
*promo time*
All you need to know about the Brunch Box is that the food definitely lived up to the hype! And speaking of which.
“At Summer XXXTreme, something that no one, much less the competitors in the ring, saw coming happened, something that’s still felt throughout the wrestling world, The Troll got a match on Summer XXXTreme!” Okay, obligatory joke out of the way. “Sorry, I had to get that one out of my system, what I’m actually talking about is the Main Event between Amber Ryan and Myra Rivers for both the Bombshell Internet and World Bombshell Championships, the match that ended Myra’s yearlong title reign!”
I said before shaking my head.
“And whilst some of us joked about it, everyone on the roster saw the impeding vacating of both Internet Titles coming from a mile away, in fact my opponent in the first round of the tournament to crown the new Bombshell Internet Champion didn’t even wait until we were off the ship to stake her claim to the Bombshell Internet Title, hell I wouldn’t be surprised if Andrea Hernandez was preparing that tweet right as Amber’s hand was being raised in victory!”
Time to take her down a peg.
“I would say that the decent thing to do would’ve been to wait until the title was actually vacated but this is Andrea Hernandez we’re talking about, the only decent thing she’s done as of late outside of the ring is this whole “Promo Police” thing we’ve got going on via Twitter but inside the ring? Well, I could play you a video of what Andrea actually sounds like when she’s cutting a promo, but I have two options and neither of them are good!”
Option number one.
“The sound of a baby crying, because all she’s done is bitch about how others are getting the spotlight! Now I’m going to play that video for the sake of everyone’s ears because let’s face it, Andrea’s voice is torture enough! What you don’t understand Andrea is that those who you consider unworthy of those opportunities have been working their asses off to get where they are today and you seemed to be awfully quiet about how the Bombshell Roulette Division took centre stage at the first show of the cycle after you’ve been slagging it off since Krystal won it, but then again, it’s a disgrace that someone other than you is getting the spotlight, isn’t it Andrea?”
Option number two.
“My other option was a President Trump speech! Now I didn’t pick any specific speech, I just typed in “President Trump Speech” into Google and hit the “I’m Feeling Lucky” option because frankly, any of them could’ve fit you to a t Andrea, now I’m not playing this video because of one simple reason, Jake pointed out how much Christian hated Trump’s presidency and that I was likely to get a title shot ban the moment he returned to take over from Candy, but my point stands! You’ve been campaigning for this shot ever since the title was vacated and I do mean that literally!”
And just to get this out of the way.
“I can already hear the comparisons to yours truly being typed furiously on Twitter, but let me make one thing clear, when I was campaigning for World Bombshell Title shots, I at least had the decency to keep politics out of it, aside from that one time in 2018 but to save myself a massive migraine, I’m not elaborating on that, Andrea on the other hand dove head first into the politics pool and hasn’t come up for air yet, someone might want to check on her.”
Or don’t, I don’t care!
“That’s where the differences lie in our respective attempts to get into the title picture Andrea but it’s also where they end! Because whilst my campaigns were successful in getting me to the dance, this is where your campaign comes to a screeching halt as I knock you out of the primary and move onto the second round and you know what Andrea? Even if I get knocked out in Round Two, I’ll still be happy knowing that I was the one who not only ended your undefeated streak but cut your campaign short!”
It’s that simple.
“In fact, why don’t we talk about that streak of yours, shall we? On paper, going undefeated for that long is an impressive feet, especially when you look at your competition up until this point but how many of them did you beat clean as a whistle? Not all of them, your undefeated streak isn’t as perfect as you want to believe Andrea and all good things come to an end, and this streak of yours? It won’t end with a bang, instead it’ll end with a whimper!”
And with that I decided to wrap things up.
“I bet you think you have all this worked out in your head, don’t you Andrea? You think that Mark, or maybe Candy, frankly I’m not sure who put this card together, gave you an easy win in round one, that they may as well have put you in an intergender match against The Troll, please, whilst everyone focusses on my win/loss record, they either forget or chose to ignore that I’m one of the most decorated female wrestlers in this company’s history and this Sunday you’ll pay the price for underestimating me when I strike you down like Blood Lightning and move onto round two!”
I went to start gaming as the scene fades.
