OH BROTHER!!!
Narrator: Although Bill Barnhart wasn’t successful in his Fatal Four Way Roulette Championship match at Climax Control 286, since it was Brother David Shepherd who landed on the mat in possession of the Roulette Championship Belt, Bill opens 2021 with his first match of the new year for a shot at the Roulette Championship. This is another Fatal Four Way Roulette Rules match that pits Barnhart against Agostino Romano, Miles Kasey, and Lincoln Daniels, with the winner goes on to face Brother David Shepherd for the Roulette Championship at the first Super Show of 2021. It doesn’t need to be stated, but I will state it anyway, that we all know Bill Barnhart will be the wrestler to win this match to go on to win the Roulette Championship from Brother David.
DON’T F*CK WITH ME
We switch scenes and we see Bill Barnhart, Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, walking around the backstage area at the Gold Coast Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. Bill and Bea are casually dressed in blue jeans, pull-over shirts, and black athletic shoes. Iris, as always, is adorned in her pink diamond-studded doggy collar. The cameraman is there to keep focused on them to broadcast what they do and say to the viewers. Bill, Bea, and Iris, stop and face the camera.
Bill: I wish to thank those viewers who tuned in today to listen to our comments leading up to my Fatal Four Way Roulette Rules match to determine who faces Brother David Shepherd at the first Super Show of 2021. I have numerous items to present so please sit back, grab your favorite drink, relax, and enjoy the show.
Bea: Before Bill launches into his presentation leading up to his match at Climax Control 289 I have a comment I wish to make. No I am not assigned to wrestle in this match as Bill is assigned to the match. So why am I contributing to his comments leading up to his match? I’m not only Bill’s wife, and a wrestler in the Bombshell Division, I’m Bill’s Manager. As his Manager I have the right to be included in his on-air time to present comments on his matches. Nobody seems to have an issue with other Managers being with their wrestler or wrestlers when they are on camera so they need to back off of me on that subject. With that out of the way I will turn it over to Bill. The first item Bill wishes to present is an incident he had in our housing development in Lawrenceville, Georgia.
Bill: Our Homeowners Association is very strict when it comes to outsiders. They have a sign posted at both entrances to our development that states Huntington Landing Homeowners Association does not accept trespassers or solicitors on their property and enforcement of the no soliciting and no trespassing restriction is enforced by Gwinnett Police.
Bea: Even with this being clearly posted at both entrances to our housing development we still have dozens of solicitors per week knocking on doors and ringing doorbells harassing homeowners. I’ll let Bill tell you about one specific incident that happened recently.
Bill: I was walking Iris in our neighborhood when I came across a solicitor inside our housing development. As previously mentioned our Homeowners Association has clearly visible signs posted, at both entrances, stating Huntington Landing Homeowners Association does not tolerate trespassing or solicitors and the key statement is ABSOLUTELY NO SOLICITING and that it is enforced by Gwinnett Police. I asked the solicitor to please leave our neighborhood since our Homeowners Association has a strict NO SOLICITING regulation and that they have Gwinnett Police enforce it. Sorry that I’m like that but I hate being bothered constantly by solicitors whether they are trying to sell roofing, siding, windows, asking you to vote for a certain political candidate, or trying to get you to switch from your current television, internet, and phone provider. When I asked this solicitor to please leave they told me to *bleep* off so I got on my phone and called the Gwinnett Police Non-Emergency number. While waiting for the Dispatcher to answer the Non-Emergency line the solicitor got upset with me for returning their *bleep* comment which they made to me first. They put their car in park, set the emergency brake, then got out of the car and charged at me and Iris threatening to hurt both of us. If only they knew I was a professional wrestler and would have driven them face-first into the pavement they wouldn’t have threatened me. Do you remember that vile moron Iris?
Iris: Grrrr!!!
Bill: I know how you feel Iris. I told the solicitor since they went from being rude and cursing to communicating a threat of harm to me and Iris, which is threatening to commit Assault and Battery on us, that I’m ending my call with Gwinnett Police Non-Emergency and dialing 911 to report an emergency of an assault about to happen. No I didn’t inform the Police that if the person got closer to me I would rearranged their face in the pavement in the street but I did tell them they’re threatening to assault me and Iris. The solicitor said they’ll wait and talk to the Police so I told them fine and for them to wait. Since I had my cell phone on speaker the instant Gwinnett Police 911 Emergency picked up and the solicitor heard their voice they took their car out of park, released the emergency brake, and sped off never to be seen again. Bottom line? Don’t f*ck with me!
Bea: Bill remained restrained during this altercation even though the solicitor threatened to harm him and Iris. I say ATTEMPT because had they tried to attack Bill they would have been quickly sent to the Intensive Care Unit at the nearest hospital as Bill would have messed them up big time.
Bill: That incident with the vile solicitor fits well as a lead-in to my match at Climax Control 289. That match opens Climax Control 289 and it is a Fatal Four Way Roulette Rules match where I face off against Agostino Romano, Miles Kasey, and Lincoln Daniels. How does it make me feel to face these three fools? It makes me feel like I’m in a Happy Days episode where I’m the Fonz, who is cool and well-liked, but I have to interact with morons like Ralph Malph, Potsie Weber, and Richie Cunningham. Sheesh! These three fools haven’t got a chance against me!
Bill, Bea, and Iris, start walking around the backstage area again. After a short time the three stop and face the camera again.
DON’T TAKE A STEP BACK. . .TAKE A STEP FORWARD
Bill: People say when you falter you need to take a step back. I say you need to take a step forward and continue moving ahead. I admit I lost the Tables, Ladders, and Chairs match for the Roulette Championship at Climax Control 286 when Brother David Shepherd landed on the mat in possession of the Roulette Championship. I refuse to take a step back and think things over. I’ll take a step forward and right the wrong that happened that night. I’ll win this Fatal Four Way Roulette Rules match against Romano, Kasey, and Daniels, then go on to defeat Brother David to become the next Roulette Champion. My match opens Climax Control 289 and there are nine matches on the Card. My performance in the opening match will be so stellar, so stunning, so spectacular, so awe-inspiring that the wrestlers in the other eight matches will fail to live up to the level of my match.
KEEPING THE INNER DEMON CONTAINED
Bill, Bea, and Iris, remain where they are while their comments continue.
Bill: I had an issue when I served in Asylum Wrestling Alliance that caused me to sometimes lose control and severely injure opponents.
Bea: It was one of those items you try to understand and figure out but sometimes you need expert assistance to find the cause and a solution.
Bill: When I contacted my Family Doctor, Doctor Kim, he found out that I had an inner demon that was controlling me. He said the inner demon was a primary result of having to endure the crap from my half-brother Chris Shipman. Doctor Kim said the inner demon would rise up and take control of me and during that time I would inflict severe, and often career-ending, injuries on opponents, without being conscious that I was inflicting that level of damage. He stressed that this inner demon thing was a direct result of having to face my evil half-brother, Chris Shipman, in some of the most twisted and violent matches ever known in the wrestling world. These matches were so twisted and sickening that the majority of those type of matches have been banned in nearly every Wrestling Federation on the planet. After Doctor Kim taught me how to control the inner demon, instead of allowing the inner demon to control me, I became more successful in Asylum Wrestling Alliance and gained the backing of the fans. This control allowed me to let the inner demon rise up without taking control of me so I could easily send it back inside and control it. However, Doctor Kim stated, there will be times that my inner demon and myself will be equal in strength and during those times I would have to work hard and endure to keep the demon under control.
Bea: That worked the majority of the time. However when Bill would get assigned to another twisted and violent match against his half-brother Chris Shipman in most of those matches his inner demon would take over to the point where Bill was not able to quickly subdue it.
Bill: When I had to face my half-brother Chris Shipman I would often knowingly allow my inner demon to come out, take control, and inflict severe damage on Chris. You are wondering why I would do something like that right? If you had a half-brother in wrestling with you, and his entire life he vowed to hurt you, injure you, destroy you, and kill you, what the hell do you think you would have done with that situation? Yeah! That’s what I thought. Since you weren’t there taking the crap from my half-brother you all need to shut the hell up! Would I do that here in Sin City Wrestling of knowingly allow my inner demon to come out, take control, and inflict damage on my opponents? I don’t plan on ever doing that again. However if my opponents go so far as to perpetrated attacks on me, or have interference in the match, then if my inner demon rises up and takes control I’ll not be held responsible for the results of the damage inflicted. You’ve been warned!
Bill, Bea, and Iris, start walking around the backstage area again and the cameraman keeps focused on them. They stop near a venue that still has some leftover holiday decorations up from 2020. They look at the remaining Christmas decorations.
CHRISTMAS 2020
Bea: Bill I really enjoyed the 2020 holiday season especially Christmas. Now the holiday season is over and we’re starting off 2021 and you get to open 2021 with a match to earn a shot at the Roulette Champion at the next Super Show.
Bill: I honestly don’t enjoy the holiday season, especially Christmas, as I don’t enjoy trying to find gifts for others and nobody knows what to get me even though they know my top two loves, after you and Iris of course, are Chocolate and Coffee. But now that we enter 2021 and my first match of the new year is to earn another shot at the Roulette Championship I couldn’t be happier.
Bea: You found the perfect gifts for me Bill. I don’t like people buying clothes or food items for me when they don’t really know what my size is or what I like to eat. You gave me twenty $10 Lottery Scratchers and I ended up winning a total of $150 in a combination of cash and additional tickets from the scratchers. Of course I would have loved to win the top prizes but you can’t always expect that is how things will turn out with Lottery Scratchers.
Bill: Maybe you cannot expect to always win the top prizes in Lottery Scratchers but for sure I expect to defeat my Romano, Kasey, and Daniels, to get a shot at Brother David for the Roulette Championship! And you nailed the gifts for me with several boxes of coffee K-Cups for our Keurig coffee brewer and a box of chocolates. My two loves, after you and Iris, coffee and chocolate! Of course Iris was the easiest one to get gifts for. Anything, and I mean anything, food-related is a great gift where Iris is concerned.
Bea: I know you’ll easily defeat Agostino Romano, Miles Kasey, and Lincoln Daniels, then you’ll defeat Brother David Shepherd and claim your rightful place as Roulette Champion.
Bill: That’s what I plan on doing.
HOLD MY…
Bill, Bea, and Iris, once again continue walking around the backstage area of the Gold Coast Casino with the cameraman diligently doing his job of keeping his camera focused on them. While they are walking in the backstage area they are met by Senor Vinnie who is also walking around the backstage area. We notice Bill has a cup of coffee in one hand and chocolate in his other hand and he goes back and forth eating chocolate and sipping coffee.
Senor Vinnie: Bill you really love your coffee and chocolate right?
Bea: Yes he does! Bill loves coffee and chocolate more than he likes pepperoni pizza and Classic Coke and that says a lot about Bill and his coffee and chocolate when you know how much he loves pepperoni pizza and Classic Coke.
Bill: I read an article where they’re predicting the world will run out of chocolate and coffee by the year 2025. My first reaction is if they run out of coffee and chocolate there’s gonna be a hell of a lot of people getting hurt at my hands.
Bill, Bea, and Vinnie, start laughing at Bill’s comments on the world running out of chocolate and coffee when an unknown person runs up to the four of them and starts going off on them.
Unknown Person: Bill Barnhart? More like Bill Blowhard! You talk smack about hurting people if the world runs out of coffee and chocolate but you don’t seem to be doing much hurt on your opponents in the wrestling ring!
Bill pauses drinking his coffee and eating his chocolate and looks at the unknown person.
Bill: Are you talking to me?
Unknown Person: Well, duh, I mentioned your name didn’t I?
Bea: I placed a call to Security and they should be here shortly to escort this moron out of the building.
The unknown person takes offense to Bea calling Security to have him taken out of the building, and also her calling him a moron, so he takes a few steps toward Bea and his fists are clenched as though he wants to hit Bea.
Bill: Vinnie hold my coffee and chocolate while I take care of this idiot.
When the unknown person hears Bill’s comments he charges toward Bill which distracts him away from trying to hurt Bea. As the man approaches Bill in a threatening manner Bill take a defensive stance and he is ready to beat this moron into next week when Security personnel show up. They see that the unknown person perpetrated the attempted attack on Bill. Security grabs the person and starts to drag him out of the building.
Unknown Person: I will get you one day Bill Barnhart! You’ll regret the day you called Security on me!
Bill: It was Bea who called Security on you not me. Also since you’ll be in jail for a significant period of time I won’t hold my breath waiting to see your pathetic face again.
Security drags the unknown person out of the building and quiet returns to where Bill, Bea, Vinnie, and Iris are standing.
Senor Vinnie: Ha ha ha!!!
Bill: What are you laughing at Vinnie? And give me back my coffee and chocolate.
Senor Vinnie: I’m laughing Bill. . .ha ha ha. . .because I have idiots come up to me all the time. . . ha ha ha. . .and disrespect me like that guy tried to disrespect you. Now. . .ha ha ha. . .watching it happen to you can see how I look when. . .ha ha ha ha. . .people do that to me. Here’s your coffee and chocolate back.
Bill takes possession of his coffee and chocolate from Senor Vinnie and he continues eating his chocolate and sipping his coffee.
Bill: Probably some thug being paid by my upcoming opponents to try to intimidate me before our match. I never get intimidated so they just wasted their money and their time hiring a moronic wannabe thug. I’ll defeat the Three Stooges so quickly that I’ll break the Sound Barrier and create a Sonic Boom in the process! I mean, come on, the combined wrestling skills and abilities of my three opponents combined doesn’t even come up to half of the wrestling skills and abilities I possess. Vinnie we’re going to return to our hotel room and then get something to eat for dinner. Care to join us?
Senor Vinnie: I appreciate the offer but I want some quiet time to ponder my match against O’Malley so I’ll see you two, and Iris, later.
Vinnie turns and walks down the hallway until he is out of sight then the cameraman returns his camera to focus on Bill and Bea.
Bill: What should we get for dinner?
Bea: Iris will eat anything so I say we go for Taco Bell or Wendy’s. For damn sure we’ll never eat at McDonald’s again after that horrible experience we had ordering food online then going to the restaurant to pick up the food.
Bill: Taco Bell it is!!!
At the sound of Taco Bell Iris perks up and she’s ready for dinner. Bill and Bea thank the cameraman for his time airing their comments. They then turn and walk away from the cameraman who keeps his camera focused on them until they are out of sight then he cuts his camera feed and our screen goes black.
