Author Topic: “Cat’s in the Cradle.”  (Read 476 times)

Offline Caleb Storms

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“Cat’s in the Cradle.”
« on: September 11, 2020, 10:19:50 PM »
Caleb had been out of action for several weeks in a row following his loss to Agostino Romano at the second Climax Control of the Supercard Cycle but since then Caleb had been under the impression that he had an Internet Title Match in his near future, so imagine his surprise when it was announced that Senor Vinnie was challenging Teddy for the title at Violent Conduct, still Caleb was undaunted as this week he was taking on a veteran who had become a mainstay in SCW since joining, one Stephan Callaway who Caleb had beaten before, can Caleb go two for two?

Caleb’s studio, Las Vegas, Nevada
Friday September 11th, 2020, 11:00am

I could’ve sworn it was said somewhere that I was set to be Teddy’s next challenger, did I imagine that?

Then again, I’m still not sure what Jessie’s dream text was all about and that was a few weeks ago! Look, whatever the situation is for me at Violent Conduct in three weeks’ time will be dealt with when I get too it but until then I get to beat up Stephan Callaway again, yay!

Seriously, how does this guy get so many chances compared to El Dark who I had a great parody song lined up for? The guy even beat El Dark in a match! Then again, so has most of the roster!

Back to Stephan Callaway and frankly I’m not worried about this guy, what I am worried about is what’s in store for my at Violent Conduct now that my plans going into the event have apparently gone out the window since no one bothered to tell me that I wasn’t actually competing for the Internet Championship and I had to find out via this week’s card.

Weeks’ worth of song parodies down the drain, thanks a lot! But for now, my focus should be obvious and that’s picking up yet another win over Stephan Callaway!

“Nope, that song parody is no good.” I commented as I scrapped the song parody of Poison’s “Every Rose has it’s Thorn”, yes, contrary to what Belinda and Jason might think I do actually go through a few song parody ideas before settling on the best ones and the best ones are the ones that have made it to air, Lemmy has by my side sitting up as he watched me go through the ideas. “Do you have any ideas Lemmy?”

“Woof!” Lemmy responded excitedly and frankly I’m not sure what answer I was expecting out of my one year old Labrador.

“Trying to have a conversation with the dog again?” Katie asked as she entered my office, for those wondering how I was able to afford renting this studio space week in, week out, well it’s simple, I saved up my money whilst we were cooped up in the hotel, Lemmy walked up to Katie with his tail wagging and I was beginning to suspect that the bark was directed at her rather than me. “Did he give you any good ideas?”

“You say that, but I might end up doing a parody of “Who Let the Dogs Out”.” I responded getting a laugh out of my wife in the process. “Who’s dodging challengers? Teddy, Teddy, Teddy, Teddy.”

“That needs a lot of work.” Katie responded with a wince before shaking her head. “By the way, the bundle you brought with your European Metal Festival Alliance ticket last month finally arrived, as did mine for that matter.”

“They got my shirt size right, right?” I asked as I glanced over at my wife who nodded in response, generally I go for XXL at least but there have been situations where I received XL shirts due to miscommunication/language barrier, sometimes I get them refunded and replaced, other times I just give them to Katie because I know they fit her like a glove. “Good, after waiting for over a month that’s the last thing I need.”

“Agreed.” Katie nodded in agreement before I returned to my work, “How many song parodies are you writing anyway?”

“Is that a trick question? I’m trying to be prepared for any opponent in the coming weeks and I still haven’t settled on a parody for Stephan Callaway!” I responded with a semi-annoyed look on my face and Katie shook her head. “I’ll have one ready for this Sunday but right now my focus is on getting this promo done.”

“So, why aren’t you cutting a promo?” Katie asked with a raised eyebrow and I went to respond but couldn’t find the words. “Thought so, hold tight, I’ll get the camera.” Katie added before she left my office space with Lemmy in hot pursuit, or should that be fursuit? Wait, no, now I’m thinking of furries and my concentration is ruined.

Thankfully by the time Katie returned with the camera not only was my mind focused on the match, but I had picked a song parody after going through my discarded ones again, you want to hear it. Wait until Climax Control! Until then enjoy my promo!

“You know, I could bring up the fact that no one told me that Senor Vinnie was going to be Teddy’s next challenger for the Internet Championship and not me and saved me the trouble of wasting several weeks of good work but I won’t, starting now! Because this week, well I would say that I have bigger fish to fry but that’s a blatant lie, kinda like saying that Teddy Warren doesn’t need adult diapers whenever J2H is around, where was I? Oh yeah, this week I’m taking on perpetual underachiever (even though he’s supposedly a veteran of the business) Stephan Callaway in singles competition!”

Competition being said with massive air quotes!

“I swear the only reason Stephan wasn’t shown the door alongside El Dark earlier this week is because Stephan actually promotes his matches! But that’s just about the only praise I can give to the brave scot that I’m facing this week because his win/loss record is a joke! He’s only won one match this year and that was against the aforementioned El Dark whilst I have won several matches this year and that trend will continue this Sunday!”

This is a joke, right?

“How someone like Stephan Callaway continues to get title opportunities whilst I get overlooked is beyond me! I’d almost be tempted to call it for the complete joke that it is if it didn’t mean Mark having some excuse for this lined up for this week’s Climax Control and it would probably be related to my song parodies to boot! Oh, and by the way, the guy you can thank for my song parodies idea? He’s the current Internet Champ! Be sure to thank him this Sunday after I kick Stephan’s ass!”

Which won’t take long.

“Honestly, it will take me longer to come up with good song parody lyrics than it will to beat Stephan Callaway in this match, that’s how much of a joke in the ring he is! Oh, what’s that? He’s a veteran? And he’s held titles in several feds that I’ve never heard off? Get in line Stephan, your almost as bad as that Chet Dakota guy who got relevant for about five seconds because he spread some lies about SCW booking him and his buddy in a match, difference is? I’ve wrestled you, and I’ve beaten you!”

It’s that simple.

“And that brings me to my main point, Stephan we’ve been through this back when you were a fresh new face in the company all those months ago and it didn’t end well for you back then either! So, what’s the difference this time? The fact that several months have passed and you’ve managed to pick up one win that time, against El Dark, a guy who I’m fairly sure my Labrador Lemmy could beat in a fight!”

And with that I decided to wrap things up!

“Stephan you are fast on the track to becoming the biggest joke in SCW and I’ll be happy to speed along the process on Sunday! I have a song parody ready to go and once that has aired the only thing left for me to do is win this match because you had better brace yourself because there’s a storm brewing, otherwise you’ll be blown away by “The Metal Storm” Caleb Storms both in the ring and in song!”

Katie cut the feed as the scene fades.
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