(We see Jack Russow, his father Levi Russow, his girlfriend Alanah O’Connell, and popping the crowd...that loveable goofball Slappy McGoo standing around the tv.)
-SCW Climax Control Press Release-
“One of the hottest free agents on the wrestling scene has officially signed on the dotted like with Sin City Wrestling! Jack Russow has come home and he is ready to make his mark in the opening contest, setting the tone for the evening as he goes One on One with the German terror, Erik Küttner! We have heard nothing but great things regarding Mister Russow, and now we will see if he can live up to the hype!”
(Levi smacks his son on the back as everyone celebrates a little bit...except for Jack Russow himself who turns a bit pale. He just stares at the television...this was it! Underneath his breath he mutters…)
Jack Russow: ...whaaaat the fuck have I gotten myself into…
(Levi walks over and cups his face absolutely beaming with pride.)
Levi Russow: Here’s your chance, boy. Time for you to gear up and show ‘em what Russow Strong really means!
(Alanah judges the look on his face and stands up putting a caring hand around his shoulder.)
Alanah O’Connell: Darling...are you okay?
Jack Russow: Wha- Huh? Oh! Oh yeah babe! Oh I’m...I’m TOTALLY stoked for this! I feel like Charlie Bucket!
(Jack starts badly dancing in place singing to everybody.)
Jack Russow: CAUSE I’VE GOT A GOOOOLDEN TIIICKET!!! I’VE GOT A GOLDEN CHANCE TO MAKE MY-
*BLEAUGHHHHHH*
(The scene cuts to show Jack puking his guts out as Slappy McGoo stands nearby patting him on the back.)
Slappy McGoo: ...nerves got ta ya, huh?
Jack Russow: Slap what the HECK am I doin’!? I...I don’t know hardly anybody here and the ones I DO know either don’t like me or they wanna take my head off! How did YOU do it!?
Slappy McGoo: I just pick up my CHIN...and GRIN...and SAAAAAAY!!!
Jack Russow: OH NO THANK YOU!
Slappy McGoo: Awww but Annie’s a classic!
Jack Russow: SLAP! You’re a wonderful performer and...you’re a total beast the ring...TEACH me...what do I do!? I’ve had two matches and those were HANDED to me!
Slappy McGoo: JACK ALEXANDER RUSSOW YOU LISTEN TO ME RIGHT NOW!!!
Jack Russow: ...well I don’t know if the WHOLE name was necessa-
Slappy McGoo: C’mere...lemme show you somethin’...
(Slappy leads Jack over to the mirror and points at Jack’s reflection.)
Slappy McGoo: Erik Kuttner, Damon, heck even your Pops out there...NONE of ‘em are as tough a fight as who you gotta fight RIGHT THERE! THAT’S your biggest opponent! And until you can look him in the eye-
Jack Russow: ...Slappy, you’re giving me the speech from Creed.
Slappy McGoo: S’that what that was? Sounded kinda familiar. Look all I’m tryina say is...I been wit’cha since you was a lil’ mischievous baby. God there was times ya made all of us wanna tear our hair out because? You were relentless. Even from a young age. Ya got yer Dad’s work ethic...and his “Never Stay Down” attitude...now am I sayin’ yer gonna win every match ya step into? O’ COURSE not! Look at me! When I went into that ladder match...I carried a lotta fear with me. I was afraid o’ the people I was facin’...I was afraid o’ the heights I had to climb to succeed. I told ‘em all...my knees was damaged beyond all repair and I was forced to retire.
Jack Russow: Well yeah...I mean it made sense! What’re you tryina say, Slap?
Slappy McGoo: Jack my knees healed just fine...physically I’m in the best shape I ever been in...I coulda come back to that ring...I coulda waved and smiled and said “HULLO!” and then thrash anyone in my way when that bell rang.
Jack Russow: ...so...so why didn’t you?
Slappy McGoo: ...I was afraid. I was afraid if I came back...everyone would talk. I’d be damaged goods...no one wants to see a broken down giant make a joke outta himself tryina act tough! But that’s ME, Jack...that was MY shortcomin’s...I wanted you to sign with SCW...s’why I set up the meeting.
Jack Russow: YOU set up the meeting?
Slappy McGoo: I admit, kiddo...yer dad...he did it ‘cause he loves ya...he was adamant you weren’t ready to set out on your own yet. He...he wanted ya under the umbrella o’ his protection until he knew you could handle the stress. The lights, the glitz, the glam...it’s all fine and good but you gotta find a way of balancin’ that with the fight! And YOU GOT THE FIGHT!!!
(Jack looks immensely moved by what Slappy was telling him...Slappy was never really the “down to Earth” kinda conversationalist. It was mostly jokes and dances and happiness...but he spoke with a sincerity in his voice that hit Jack in the soul.)
Slappy McGoo: I was there durin’ yer trainin’...an’ I had to keep my mouth shut. Milo WAS the best in that class...but you wasn’t in THAT class, kid! You was in a class all on your own! You didn’t know it but even though you was workin’ out with all o’ them other kids, you...you were held to a different standard. An’ I didn’t think it was right but yer dad...he signs the checks. But then somethin’ HAPPENED…
Jack Russow: ...wh-...what happened?
Slappy McGoo: Ya got MAD! Ya heard yer dad tell yer biggest rival HE was the best in the class...then Milo dropped ya on yer head...and everyone from yer dad to Cameron to even Bella told ya MAYBE it wasn’t right fer ya. They told you NO, Jack. And from that day on...Gah, you exploded into this juggernaut. YOU don’t even know how good ya are yet...but I do. So yeah...go ‘head kiddo...puke yer guts out, get the nerves in yer system but don’t do what I did...don’t you run...you FEEL those nerves...you USE ‘em...they’ll make ya fly!
Jack Russow: Slap this guy...he’s dredgin’ up memories...what if I freeze?
Slappy McGoo: ...now you listen to me. I know where you been...what you been through...the WAR you fought this past year. WE did...what had to be done. But this is yer clean slate, kid! THIS is YOUR shot! You ain’t gonna freeze...you ain’t gonna fail...yer gonna live up to every ounce of hype buzzin’ about you right now!
...yer a Russow, kid...make ‘em put some respeck on ya name!!!
(Jack wipes his chin as Slappy pulls him into a bearhug and they leave the bathroom to rejoin the party in the suite.)
-PROMO-
“I’m made of wax, Larry...what are YOU made of?”
-Teddy Roosevelt, Night at the Museum
(The scene opens to show Jack Russow in full gear wrapping his wrists sitting upon a production box. Various members of the roster sneer at him as they walk past. He sees clutters of people looking over at him and then going right back to whispering. Someone heckles “YOU DON’T BELONG, RICH BOY!” at him as a can is thrown outta nowhere. Jack tries to shake it off but he bites his bottom lip to keep it from quivering. Once he’s finished wrapping his wrists...he takes out a marker and writes “ALANAH” on the inside of his wrist tape. He closes his eyes...takes a deep breath...kisses her name for luck and hops off the production box to walk to the interview area. As he approaches he sees a rather curvy figure bent over as he clears his throat. A pretty woman turns and offers her hand excitedly.)
Pussy Willow: MR RUSSOW! Hi! I’ll be conducting an interview with you, my name is Pussy! Pussy Willow!
(Jack gets a kinda...look on his face that she picks up on and laughs it off.)
Pussy Willow: I know, I know I get it all the time...but that’s my real name! Shall we get started!?
Jack Russow: ...I mean...I suppose? Umm...what...what do I do?
Pussy Willow: Oh! Well it’s real simple, you just stand over here on this mark and when we start rolling, I’ll start asking you some basic questions to get the crowd introduced to you and yadda yadda yadda, it’ll be great! Ready!? ROLL ‘EM!
(Jack absolutely freezes at how quick this chick just cut the camera on him and he stands like a deer in the headlights.)
Pussy Willow: SCW Faithful it’s ya girl, Holly Wood! And I’m here today with the FIRST EXCLUSIVE interview with SCW’s newest, hottest hyped free agent signing...JACK RUSSOW! Yes! A RUSSOW in SCW!!! There goes the neighborhood, huh Jack!
Jack Russow: *quietly* ...y-...yeh…
(Holly looks at him with bewilderment and a hint of rage.)
Pussy Willow: O-Okay well, Jack! You’re making your SCW debut in the opening contest of Climax Control against Erik Kuttner! Now is it true that this is only your THIRD MATCH EVER!?
Jack Russow: I mean...I done other matches...like, before I trained and...umm...I’m sorry, what was the question?
Pussy Willow: Awww does someone have a case of the Pre-Debut jitters!?
(Jack bites his bottom lip again and he looks at the blinding studio light wincing before looking beyond and seeing people gathered around watching...laughing at him. A few of the established SCW roster snickering at him...this wet-behind-the-ears, snot-nosed rich boy that had no business in THEIR world. And the panic starts to set in as he looks frantically around and almost on cue...turning the corridor with Bella Madison...he sees Alanah O’Connell. She makes eye contact with him and sees him floundering. She mimes the motion to take a deep breath...which he does. Then she blew him a kiss and gives him a wink...and all of a sudden, he loostens. You see him shake out the nerves and he zeroes back in.)
Jack Russow: Ms. Willow, lemme ask you something if I may.
Pussy Willow: ...a little unconventional but...okay? You can call me Pussy!
Jack Russow: IIIIIII will pass on that. You’re obviously a very attractive young lady with an unfortunate name swimming in a tank with sharks that would rather take your legs than pull you out of the sea, how long...did it take you to start earning respect around here?
Pussy Willow: ...awhile...I’m not even sure I get respect…
Jack Russow: Well Ms. Willow I would like to commend you for your line of questioning and thank you for the airtime but let’s...let’s GET a little “unconventional” shall we? Let’s make it WEIRD. If it’s alright with you, why don’t I just take the mic because I have...a LOT of things I’d just LOVE to get off my chest…
Pussy Willow: Err...okay! The floor is yours!
(Pussy Willow hands Jack the microphone and he takes a second, looking at it with a moment of reflection as he looks up and sees Alanah has walked up with her hands covering her mouth in anticipation...hoping he pulls through the stage fright. She nods at Jack...and he gives her a solemn nod back before starting to pace back and forth.)
Jack Russow: Y’know management wise...ever since I got here...they’ve been great. They’ve been MORE than great, I couldn’t be HAPPIER with the reception they’ve given me since I signed my contract. And I have no doubt...it’s because they just wanted...my last name. But let me pull back the curtain and show you...a DIFFERENT reality. Here let’s just…
(The cameraman protests but Jack assures him it’s okay as Jack swings the camera around the backstage area showing all of the people watching him, judging him, smirking at him. The camera swings back around.)
Jack Russow: See at face value...on PAPER...God, THIS place has been great.
(Jack runs his hand through his hair and shakes it out getting a bitter look on his face.)
Jack Russow: But none of that means a damn thing...if you don’t have the respect of the locker room. See cause ever since I got here? I’ve been hated and vilified BECAUSE of my family’s legacy. I’ve gotten a lot of “rich boy” and “Russow WHO?” and I know...I’m FULLY...AWARE...that my name means absolute DICK here until I show you exactly why it makes me special and hey man, I GET that! So what do I get for my debut match? I get a big ass German that’s gonna slap the shit outta my chest who comes...from a CIRCUS.
(That word absolutely makes Jack cringe but he regains his composure glaring back into the camera.)
Jack Russow: See I am SICK and GODDAMN TIRED...of dealing with ANYTHING circus, sideshow, or ESPECIALLY...CARNIVAL related! See cause I know none of you know me from Adam...you don’t know who I am or where I come from but let’s just say in ANOTHER company that shares a few fellow roster members as SCW and in THAT company...for the PAST. YEAR. I’ve dealt with a psychotic fat-ass Cajun preaching “ringmaster” of some bullshit he called the Darkest Carnival like something outta that movie We’re Back! A Dinosaur Story and you’re ALL about to eat some o’ that bland ass Brain Grain. He took my father and turned him against my family...they tried their damndest to kill the rest of my family...my best friend...ME...and so you’ll have to EXCUSE me if I hear “March of the Gladiators” and get a little PUNCHY. But I get a little PUNCHY because I have ALL THIS GODDAMN RAGE and a phobia of clowns and what do YOU do!? You stick me in a match with...what’s his name? Knuttsack? We’re goin’ with Knuttsack, KNUTTSACK...I want you to find a translator...and have them repeat this twice. So I come through...as CLEAR...as I CAN..
(Jack squares up with the camera and is absolutely frothing at the mouth, a complete 180 from how he started the interview.)
Jack Russow: I don’t need a bunch of threats...I don’t need a bunch of hokey catchphrases...I don’t need any tricks, gimmicks, or glimmer. What I NEED...is to take every single ounce of frustration I’ve felt this past year out...on your THICK...DENSE ASS. I don’t speak German...so find a translator for this one and make sure they repeat it for you twice. I’m going...from that psychotic fat-ass Cajun...to some oversized fat-ass German who can’t wrestle to save his fuckin’ life. All you do is chop? Go ahead. Chop away, Paul Bitchyan. Because when it’s all said and done?
...I’m not gonna outwrestle you…
...I’m not gonna outsmart you…
...I’m just pure...straight...going to FFFFUCK...YOU...UP.
(Jack squares off against the people that were smirking at him.)
Jack Russow: And then ANY chirpy little motherfuckers that wanna step up after THAT? I ain’t hard to find. So THERE...Holly...THERE’S my thoughts on the “PRESSURE” of my debut. RUSSOW EXITS...STAGE LEFT.
(Jack drops the mic and exits off set square into the awaiting arms of Alanah O’Connell who assures him how good he did as they share a kiss and walk off down the hallway holding hands as the scene ends.)
