Bullhead RV Park, Outside Laughlin, Nevada
Laughlin has many RV parks it is in fact one of the nation’s top spots for RV enthusiasts but this RV park is not quite the top hot spot in town. On any other night the place would look run down and nearly empty, but as fate would have it Aleksei Koji is in town. This expanse of cracked roads and weeds is the perfect place for his caravan. The wrestling show has been over for hours but the party is still going. A small gathering of RVs, cars and Harleys have merged on the far side of the park overlooking the Colorado River. Loud music plays as a mass of people dance in the center where headlights light up their makeshift dance floor.
Surveying it all is Aleksei, sitting on top of an RV in a lawn chair. Several women are gathering around him as he tells a story about some misadventure he got into in South America. Little bottles of booze litter the roof of the camper and seeing that Aleksei is wearing only boxers and his patchwork coat, it is safe to assume he has been at it for a while. Danny his trusty #1 fan is there as always but for the moment he has set the camera down. Something has got the Russian very excited. He runs over to Aleksei trying not to step on bottles or women. He whispers something into Aleksei ear. Aleksei looks at Danny a moment and then starts laughing. He leaps out of his chair, nearly falling off the RV. Danny has to grab his jacket to keep him on his feet.
Aleksei: Turn off the music...I want to tell you all that I love you! and also I have just been told that I am getting a chance to beat the crap out of people for a tittle! All because of you...my sexy fans and also because I am world expert at taking a beating but still punching back hard as stone! Look at these babies.
Aleksei holds up his fist and the crowd goes wild. Half of them are too drunk to even know why they are so happy.
Aleksei: I have brilliant idea. All of you should come with me to Sparks, Nevada. You come to the show, and when I win we can party with such epicness that they will speak of it for years. You can be my...my victory horde...no even better you can be my party horde.
Aleksei leans even further out into the crowd. Danny needs help from some of the women to keep Aleksei from tumbling off the edge.
Aleksei: YOU ARE MY PARTY HORDE!!
The big Romanian gets pulled back to safety and slumps back into his chair, giggling as the crowd chants PARTY HORDE....PARTY HORDE over and over again.
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SOMEWHERE ON THE ROAD TO SPARKS
The camera turns on but it is sideways. We see the remains of a very wild party. Piles of clothes mingle with trash and for a moment you swear you can see some elaborate sex toy of some sorts, but alas the camera is lifted up from its spot on the ground. We see that Aleksei is now laying in the back bed of an RV. Nearly naked bodies surround him.
Danny: Where are we? and where are my pants.
Aleksei (mumbling): In an RV of course.
Danny: I can see with my eyes but who does it belong too.
Aleksei: I don’t know. I assume the person who is driving it....but this is more important...open the windows.
Danny reaches out and opens the windows. We see that the camper is driving on a desert highway and that many of the RVs from last night are following behind. Aleksei starts laughing, very pleased with himself.
Aleksei: Party horde..HA...I never thought they would really follow us.
Danny: Do you have any idea what you’re doing?
Aleksei: I work best when I have no idea what is coming next.
Danny: But you have to focus my main man! You have a title match.
Aleksei shrugs and climbs over the bodies looking for food. He finds that there is half a pizza in one of the boxes. He brushes it off some and takes a big bite.
Danny: Do you have any idea what a title belt is worth.
Aleksei (mouth full of food): What like if we pawned it?
Danny: No! not money...glory. You get on T-shirts. You get to be main event. You are Prime Time now if you win, not that engrez Kennedy. But money too, they pay you more when you are main event star.
Aleksei: Ok, well that sounds good. I was already planning on showing up for a fight, what more do you want from me.
Danny: Do you have plans? How are you going to win?
Aleksei: I do my best work without a plan. You know how romani work. We are at our best when we are the underdogs. Primetime and Mr. Freight Train think that this fight is about them, so they won’t see me coming. Maybe I will let them beat the crap out of eachother while I watch, I can even give them pointers. Then I come in and drive my fist into their sorry skulls...that might work. Or how about this. Casey and I just start pounding on Primtime until he is just a bloody pulp on the mat.
Danny: Then what? What about Casey Williams? That man is huge.
Aleksei: So what! I have taken down giants before. He thinks he is going to win on size alone. If that was the case they would just hand the belts to the biggest brutes that show up. You have to win matches and I don’t see Williams doing a lot of that. He is a big angry mess of a man that I will see coming a mile away. What is he going to do? He is big enough to hurt me Danny but he is not big enough to keep me down. He knows how to fight but does he know what it takes to win a true brawling battle. It is not about anger and size. It’s about the quiet place your mind goes to right before you break a man so that there is nothing left. (Aleksei then burps and chuckles a little bit. He takes another bite of pizza.)
Aleksei: I will tell you one thing Danny. I am looking forward to putting the hurt on Kennedy. That man is no champion. He whines like a little girl. You know what I thought when I heard about this match....I thought fuck yeah lets do this thing. Lets show the world what warriors can do in the ring. I didn’t worry who deserved to be in that ring or not, that is not my job. But Kennedy cries to everyone about his widdle plans being ruined.
That is what you get for having plans you stupid coward. See my plan is to get into ring, soak in the glory of the fans cheering and fucking do battle. There is no way that plan can be ruined, I don’t even have to win. All I have to do is smack that smug look off your face Kennedy and show Casey what a real fight feels like.
But if I do win, you know what I promise everyone out there who might hear this. I won’t be a bitch about my belt. I will take on every challenge that comes my way. I will fight in any kind of match, in the ring or out of the ring. I will climb in the mud or through glass if that is what it takes, because that is what the Roulette Championship is all about. It is about rolling with what the fates bring your way and showing the world you are not afraid.
Maybe you don’t like to try your luck, Kennedy, because your luck sucks.
(Aleksei grins after that, flashing his best charming smile.)
Aleksei: But I am Romani and luck is always on the side of the traveler. So Kennedy can whine all he wants and Williams can scream a whole lot. None of that matters to me. Just make sure both of you show up ready for the fight of your lives because I will be bringing it all your way. Soon enough you won’t be worried about belts and rivalries. All that will be on your mind will be survival. Is that a good enough plan for you Danny?
Danny nods the camera and you can hear him laughing with glee.
Danny: I just hope they make you into action figure.
Aleksei: You scare me with your love of toys. I need more booze...and pancakes. Tell the driver the party horde needs pancakes!
FADE OUT
