A Long Road for a Stormy Night
Scene One | Off-Camera
Journaling had become a way for Alex to deal with his own mind. Detailing his life, the events that led to where he was now. The death of his mother, his father, his best friend, and even the disappearance of Leon. It also meant that he finally had a way of actually dealing with his sadness. The depression.
The early entries were where the most pain existed. The entries about his youth. About his mother, about Luna and James. Reality was, his entire identity was wrapped up in these people.
“I remember the day I properly saw her for the first time, Luna. A free spirited, hot-headed, hit first ask questions later kind of girl. She was a little younger than me, a couple of years. But I can still picture seeing her like it happened yesterday. Beautiful, long cascading brown hair, double dutch braids. We’d actually known each other for a while. See her brother, James. He’s the one who gave me the name D. But it wasn’t now, no. No that came much later. That doesn’t matter right now anyway. No, what matters is where things started. Things started with the day I finally noticed Luna. That was the thing about puberty. Suddenly girls and boys were far more fascinating. See for me, Luna was the way that I was pulled. For James? Puberty wasn’t good for James. Not in the town we grew up in, not at all. Old mentality, stuck in the mud and conservative.
The three of us, we weren’t the most well liked, even before life began to try and mould us. I don’t look favourably on it now, but James and I? We were kind of bullies. Not because we wanted to hurt people, but because it was the only way to protect ourselves. The child of German immigrants, and the brother and sister who were the kids of the town’s shame. My parents, sweet as they were? Things weren’t easy. We were poor, my father? I thought he was the best at the time, but I understand why we were poor now that I look back on it. Terrible boxer, like. Just god awful, but boy did he try. Mum was good with a thread and needle. Nobody would ever admit it, but the only reason we ever had food on the table was because mum was good with fabric, needle and thread. It was like watching a ballerina spin and spin, when I watched her. Tough and tested hands, moving with speed and care. Perfect lines, perfect folds. She was a master at it. She deserved more recognition than the country bumpkin town ever gave us.
Doesn’t matter really. That’s not the point. That comes into it later, I promise. Mum and dad, they are a big part of the story, but they aren’t the point right now. No, the point was that I was suddenly infatuated with Luna, and James, though I didn’t know it yet. Jimmy was falling for me. Better at hiding his emotions than I ever was, I didn’t know then. I didn’t find out until the end. When he gave me the name. Gave me that nickname, D. As kids, the name didn’t make sense. In any case, I remember the day that I saw Luna. It wasn’t the first time I ever saw her, but it was definitely the first time I ever saw her that way. Love at first sight makes sense if you don’t assume first sight to be the first sighting. The first time I really saw her.
When I think back on it, I don’t even know if it was girls that I was interested in. I think it was just her. Closeness, proximity, familiarity. I think that’s what made me fall in love. I’ve been with other women, and don’t think I'm a bad person. We all have needs to be fulfilled, I’m sure you understand. Just, I didn’t ever really love anyone else. Maybe it was because of what would come, the heartbreak and the destruction. I’m not sure. I guess that’s not entirely true. There was one other, in that way. Different heartbreak, but heartbreak the same. I just don’t know if I ever loved her, the way that I loved Luna. That comes later though, I promise. I’ll get to the point eventually. Thank you for the patience, I know it’s not the easiest. To hear about the trivialities of someone's life, when all you want to know is where the dumb name comes from. It’ll make sense when we get there, and I don’t see a need to rush. It’s a long drive after all.
She was beautiful even back then. Sharp features, long gorgeous hair. The double dutch became synonymous with her in my mind. Even now, I can’t imagine her any other way. Even if we did spend so many years together, and I saw her in every way, that was the image in my mind. Older, life having taken its toll on her. Stress and sadness are plaguing her face, but beneath it all. That beautiful woman with the piercing blue eyes. They both had those eyes, piercing blue. Almost grey when I think about it. Cutting through to the soul itself. There was nothing she couldn’t see with those eyes. I loved her from that moment onwards. Not without its struggles, but there was always that affection. James had those same eyes, and at times it was hard to differentiate them in my mind. They weren’t twins, but they might as well have been. Identical to each other in every way that mattered. Sharp eyes, long hair and a smooth tongue. Lexi baby, they called me back then. I think it was to see me squirm. Even now it makes me shudder. Maybe more than it once did. I’m not one for the soft affections. Pet names and the like were never my thing. The most they ever got out of me was Jimmy and Lu. They didn’t stop them though. I miss the simpler times.
Did she love me? At the time, I didn’t know. I wasn’t even sure how to broach the subject with her. I think she did, I hope she did. The hard thing for them, as it would turn out, was that they were both in love with the same boy. Sometimes I wonder how much it hurt James to make the choices he did. Not to tell me how he felt until the end. Telling Luna to follow through with her dreams. To follow her own heart. I sometimes wonder how different things might have been if I’d had the same infatuation with Jimmy that I did with Luna. No, with sorrow I have to admit. I never fell for James, but I still loved him all the same. As a brother, as my friend. As the man who brought the light into my life and never let me wallow. Who held my hand through the hard times. I don’t know how he could be so strong, you know? As things would end up, I sometimes wish I had been able to give him what he deserved.
Sorry, you’ll have to excuse me if I get a bit emotional. Although it’s a story I’ve told time and time again, it still gets to me. See, it’s not a happy story. Nobody really has that happy of a life story, I don’t think. Bright smiles hiding traumas and lies. Happy families the cover story for the most prolonged of abuse. How many bruises can be hidden if they are inflicted on the heart and brain? People are tortured and unhappy. You don’t think so? I wish I could have that positivity. The blind faith in the goodness and purity of people. The blind faith to climb into the car with a stranger, in the middle of the night, in a storm. To listen to them tell a story about love and loss, and how that gives them their nonsensical nickname. Going to the same place as this person who has such distrust. You are a better person than me. I don’t have such blind faith in the good intentions of people. Although, I guess if there are people like us in the world, maybe there isn’t so much bad.
To swing back on it all, James and I? We were notorious for solving things with our fists. We mostly kept to ourselves, but if someone looked at us wrong? A fat lip, black eye and another suspension. I don’t know why I kept doing it, to be honest with you. The only thing worse than everyone thinking poorly of me, was what would happen at home. See, my dad might not have been very good at boxing, but when he was three whiskeys deep and found out I’d been suspended again for fighting? You’d be amazed at how heavy the alcohol loaded hands of an angry man could be. My father loved me, I’m sure. Once upon a time anyway. As I got older though, and he got drunker? There wasn’t so much love as there was resentment. Resentment for being inadequate, resentment for being a failure in both my eyes and his own. My dad, he wasn’t a well educated man. Taking falls for cash was the safer bet, because he wasn’t good enough to even go toe to toe at the local. He never went to points when it came to me though.
I don’t blame him, I understand it. I don’t forgive him for it, but I know why he was the way that he was. Generational trauma would be the easy explanation, but it's not one that I accept. No, I’m more inclined to believe he was just mean. A mean drunk, a mean man. A mean man who the only person that he could exert any level of power over was his wife and his son. His wife had no problem hitting him back. Despite her chosen profession, she wasn’t a slight woman, my mother. Thin as a slip, sure, and sinewy. Yet there was no stronger wall in this world but her. I adored my mother. Yet, as is the case in a lot of my life. The most beautiful and pure people often do not get to see the brightness of tomorrow. What happened? I don’t think it’s time for that just yet. I know I’ve promised a lot, but I do promise. I will explain everything in time.
Everything has its place. What matters here is the key points that started it all. A love triangle, an abusive father, and a distrust for the world. Everything started the last time I ever went to school. Sixteen going on seventeen, I believe. My birthday was soon, which in my mind meant that I was one step closer to being free. Free to leave home, free to run off with James. Free to be our own people. As it would happen, everything changed that day. That was the day I fell in love with her. Teenage girls can be some of the cruellest people in the world. Luna and James were prime targets. An unapologetic flamboyant boy and a flirtatious and friendly girl. Luna was more at home with the boys than the girls, and that led to rumours. Hushed whispers and nasty words. It was on that day, a domino effect started. A series of unrelated events that resulted in everything that would happen”He placed his pen down, and reached up to his face. Touching his nose gingerly. The doctor had recommended a face guard to protect his nose. Jayden had dislocated it in their match, and whilst the swelling and bruising had mostly gone down. He was in significant pain. Not that he would tell anyone that. Not even Luna really knew how bad it was.
He felt her arms wrap around his shoulders and a light kiss placed to the top of his head.
“Whatcha writing, big boy?” Luna asked sleepily. She seemed to have had a rough night’s sleep.
“Reminiscing on the most beautiful people in my life.” Alex replied.
Facts
Scene Two | On-Camera
“Thirty minutes of torture. That was what Jayden Harris promised me. He played the field, used Guy to get the match he wanted and what happened? He couldn’t get the job done. For thirty minutes I did exactly what I said I would, and he couldn’t put me down. Now, J2H may have jumped the gun just slightly, but I don’t hold that against him. The record books might put it as a win for little Jayden, but every person who watched that match? They’ll know the truth. Hell, even you have to know Jayden. You couldn’t get it done, and that was exactly what I said would happen. Funny, I always seem to be right in the end.”
“But that doesn’t matter right now, does it? No, for the third week in a row the people get blessed with the presence of Alexander Raven. For the third week in a row I get to wrestle what is the main event of the show. Questionably the ladder match for the Golden Briefcase was in the main event ‘slot’, but I don’t think a single person really thought of it that way. No, I think, most people would agree. Alexander Raven versus Jayden Harris? That was the main event. Alexander Raven versus Aiden Reynolds? Main event. This week, we finally get the opportunity that we have been demanding for the last year. The opportunity that has been denied from us for the last twelve months.”
“The Conspiracy is finally given our chance to become the Mixed Tag Team Champions. Every other team, every other rag tag thrown together nobody group. Every single person who has even looked the way of those championships? They’ve been given the world. Ben Jordan and Samatha Marlowe, Miles Kasey and Alexandra Callaway, fucking Carter and Angelos. In what fucking world do any of those teams deserve a shot over us? In what world do those nobodies get a chance at the championship that was made for The Conspiracy before us? No, that in of itself is part of the thing we have been attempting to expose. Part of what we have been attempting to put the spotlight on. Part of what we have needed to break free of. This inadequacy, this unfairness. This favouritism that continually elevates those who are undeserving.”
“But let’s not talk about that. No, let’s talk about what is before us. Let us talk about you and I, Finn. It’s almost funny how things come full circle. Two years ago, you were Roulette Champion. Two years ago, I beat you for the Roulette Championship. Two years ago, on that cruise, I beat you again. I beat you, I beat Miles and I beat Bill. Two years ago, there was this… chasm. Two years ago, when it came down to you or me? It was always me. I went on to do some great things, but you know what? You did greater. I failed to upend Ken Davison’s world title reign. You took it from him, if only for a little bit. You proved you were ready to sit atop that mountain, and I went on to have a defining Internet Championship reign. Two years on, here we are. You as World Champion, as Mixed Tag Team champion, and me… I’m middling.”
“That’s the truth of it. No amount of anger, no amount of venomous words. No amount of denial and bark. None of it matters. The truth is, I’m exactly where I was two years ago. I asked… no, I told Aiden, that the Finn I beat? Not fit to hold the bags of the Finn of today. That is the truth of it. I might not have always had this same level of respect, but I could easily see the success of a man. I’m as Aiden put it. I’m a ring general. I’m a tape watcher, I’m a man who spends his time getting under people’s skin. I am… unique. I’m unique because there is nobody else that does what I do. I’m unique because I’m the only fucking man in Sin City that can say that I have not just a victory over our reigning and defending world champion. No, I have two.”
“I have two victories over you. I have a victory over Peter Vaughn, over Mark Cross. I even hold a win over Ken Davison himself. Ben Jordan, Fenris and Austin James Mercer. Hell, I even beat Matt Knox in a freaky little pyramid in Nepal not long ago. There’s not a single person in this company that has taken down more world champions than me. The Napalm Kingslayer of Sin City Wrestling. It’s not just a boast either. It’s a fact. It’s a fact that despite my ‘choke artistry’ as every single person likes to put it. From Dickie to Jayden, to half the people in the back without the balls to step to me. They’ve been saying it since day dot. They’ve been saying the same thing over and over and wondering why it doesn’t affect me.”
“The thing is, I’m used to being insulted. I’m used to being put down. I’m used to being underestimated. That’s the whole fucking thing about this industry. That’s the whole thing about wrestling as a whole. If you’re not respected, you’re always going to be underestimated. They’re always going to think themselves a step above you, because respecting that idea that someone else could be your equal, or your superior. That doesn’t sit right for them. It doesn’t sit right for people to be the lesser man. It doesn’t sit right for people to think of themselves as the underdog. The underdog always wants to be the man, and the man never wants to be the underdog. I’ve been the man, I’ve been the underdog. I’ve been the lesser, the equal and the better. I have been it all, and it does not worry me. It does not scare me. It does not stop me.”
“You, Finn. You of all people know. You know what to expect. You know what is to come. You know, because you don’t pretend. You don’t pretend to see others as lesser. That’s not to say you’re wrong though. You don’t pretend, because you always believe it. You believe in superiority. You believe in success being measured by the visual, and not by the stance that one takes. Not by the successes of what was, but the success of what is and will be. You are a man who stands at the top and said that this was going to be Finn City Wrestling. You were going to show the world who you are, and what you are capable of. To be a fighting fucking champion, and not to laze about on the sidelines. That's what I expected of you. That was what I asked of you.”
“And you’re close. You’re ever so close to being that man. Except, when I look across the board. When I look at who stands to be the man. Who stands to be the woman. There are two names that stand above them all. Two names that constantly get talked about, that everyone murmurs. That every person tunes in to see. It isn’t Kayla Richards and Finn Whelan. It isn’t Juliana, or Jamie Dean. Hell, right now, I wouldn’t even say it’s for Peter Vaughn who is a ready threat on your little radar Finn. Vaughn’s shown some damage in his armour. Vaughn has shown some chinks in the chainmail, and is looking a little wobbly. No, the only people that are on everybody’s lips are the two that stand across the ring from you this Sunday. Alexander Raven and Luna Pasilno.”
“Truthfully, nobody expects us to win. Not here, and not at Summer Xtreme. Nobody expects Luna to upset Kayla Ricahrds. Nobody expects Alexander Raven to notch a third victory against Finn Whelan. Nobody expects it, and they paint us the underdogs. The only people deserving of a fucking chance at those Mixed Tag Team Championships that we have continuously been denied. For a year we have been overlooked for every other possible team, and I wonder. I wonder why that is. I wonder if they are trying to keep us down, or if there is the idea of danger. The danger that those titles in the hands of The Conspiracy give them even more time in the spotlight. That giving them those titles means that it becomes even harder to deny the truth of what they say. When Alexander Raven and Luna Pasilno are on that card, no other matches matter. Nobody cares about Tempest and her forgettable Internet Championship reign. Nobody cares about Peter Vaughn and his ineptitude at defending his championship.”
“Nobody cares about Finn Whelan and Kayla Richards fighting another nobody tag team, or another faceless nobody. Jamie fucking Dean? I already beat him. The man couldn’t step to me, but somehow. Someway, he gets a shot at the World Title. It reminds me of when Miles and King James got my spot against Michael Harris. You know they never even considered me, and then I showed them. I made them see, that I was fucking good enough. I made the world see, and in turn. I made J2H see. I’ve had my qualms with him, and still. Even shaking hands with the man, there are things that I would wish to have seen differently, but. I understand it. I understand why he does what he does, why he says what he says. I understand it Finn. I understand people. That’s my strength.”
“I understand people. I understand why they do what they do. I understand why they fight the way they fight. I understand what they are focused on, and in turn? I know how to break them. I understand because I put in the work. I do the hard yards. I am what I demand of others. I am the fucking workhorse of Sin City Wrestling. I am the goddamn Napalm Kingslayer, because I am the one who works to tear them down. I have no problem throwing myself at an issue, over and over. Driving to insanity, because I expect a different outcome. The thing is, the more times I bash my head over and over into that mat. The more times I drop people on their fucking necks, and choke them out. The more I take, the more I get it. The more I understand. The more I know.”“I know how to fucking break you.”
“That’s not a threat, it’s a guarantee. I know that is a cliche, but sometimes. The cliche has it right. See you are holding something of a bargaining chip for me, Finn. I’ve been vocal about my disdain with this company. I’ve been vocal about my actions, my choices, my decisions. I’ve been vocal about it, because someone has to be listening. Someone has to see what I’m talking about. Someone needs to know, and finally. Finally the little bitch that is Christian Underwood, he’s taking notice. Piling on his ignorance and pretence, and in turn? Suddenly becoming very aware of the threat of what is before him. October is three months ago, October is when my contract comes up. I now have the Roulette Championship thanks to Victoria. After Climax Control? I’ll be holding that Mixed Tag Team Championship as well, and then, what do they do? Do they make me the only man they book week after week?”
“Do they hope that my body gives in and my heart gives out? Do they hope that I stoop and fall, and I have to vacate the championships that I am gathering? Or do they finally open the door, and ask me what I want. Do they finally put the contract in front of me, with blank clauses ready to be filled by the one man in all of Sin City Wrestling who matters. I suspect they hope to silence me before then. That we’ll lose to you and Kayla. The toughest, the most deadly, the most frustrating that they have. The two champions they feel so confident in because they are undefeatable. Eight and zero, that’s the tale of the tape for you two this year. Eight and zero, undefeated. It’s impressive, and I won’t pretend otherwise.”
“I won’t pretend that we’re on even footing, because we’re not. You’re on a roll, and I’ve been ‘choking’. You’re champions to be proud of, and I have a consolation prize. I wonder though. What happens when the momentum stops? What happens when the great Finn Whelan and Kayla Richards, choke? It took me a long time to recover. Hell, some might say I never did. Truthfully, in my fifty three matches here? I’d say my victories are often forgotten in place of the defeats. Forgetting the acumen of the people I throw myself at, week after fucking week. Forgetting that I have been victorious over everyone from Bill Barnhart to you, Finn. Forgetting that I am a three time fucking champion in this company, and I will make sure that the next three months of my title reign are the most memorable in the history of this championship. I know this, because I am the workhorse of Sin City Wrestling. I am the man around here.”
“But it’s not all about you, is it Finn? No, in fact, I’d say Kayla is the more important part of this team. The undefeated one herself. Never having lost on Climax Control, she is a force to be reckoned with. Some would say an even more impressive run than you, Finn. The woman has elevated the Bombshell division to being the continual main event this year, and I suspect. Come Summer Xtreme, Luna and yourself, Kayla. You’ll be the main attraction once again. Regardless of how it came to be, regardless of this match’s outcome. Regardless of every word left unsaid because Luna doesn’t want to hurt you, just yet. I think you're the killer here, Kayla. Any other situation I think you’ve got this in the bag. The confidence, the skill and the record. You are the killer who is overlooked because of the man at your side. Similarly to how Luna is overlooked because of me. Luna is the killer, I’m just the talker. She’s the fighter, and I’m the strategist. That’s how it has always been, and people are suddenly becoming acutely aware of that. They’re becoming acutely aware of the fact that Luna is the top bitch around here.”
“I wonder, Kayla. Do you put your faith in Finn to get the job done this time, knowing that he hasn’t beaten me before. Knowing that reality says I am the foil to him. I am the barb in his side, and the pea in his mattress. I get asked a lot about trust, I get questioned about trust. Constantly do people tear down relationships because they do not understand what it means to have unending faith in your partner, but in this situation? I need to know. Do you trust him to beat me? I would like to think you do. But what do you risk in the outcome that Finn cannot get the job done? You lose your undefeated streak for the year. You lose your undefeated streak on Climax Control. You lose the Mixed Tag Team Championships, and you walk into Summer Xtreme without the momentum, knowing that you are about to lose everything. Do you think you can trust Finn not to cost you everything you hold dear?”
“I wonder, Kayla. Have you been listening?”“I need you both to listen.”
