ME AND ROUX WILL DEFEAT LUNA PASILNO AND SEAN PARKER AND MOVE AND WILL MOVE CLOSER TO THE BLAST FROM THE PAST FINAL MATCH
Narrator: Welcome to my opening comments for today concerning the Blast From The Past Tournament match where Bill Barnhart and Roux face off against the team of Luna Pasilno and Sean Parker. This should prove to be an interesting and exciting match. I will now turn you over to Bill Barnhart for his comments concerning his upcoming match.
OPENING COMMENTS
The scene shifts and we are taken to the lobby of the Courtyard Hotel located in Troy, Turkey. As the camera pans around the lobby the camera person stops panning the room when they see Bill and Bea Barnhart sitting in the lobby. The camera person sets up their camera to that the camera shot will be steady. The camera person informs Bill and Bea they are live broadcasting.
Bill: Before I launch into comments concerning my upcoming Blast From The Past Tournament, where me and my partner Roux take on Luna Pasilno and Sean Parker, I want to share a video with you of a recent interaction I had with our English Bulldog Iris, during a video call, once my Blast From The Past Tournament match for Climax Control 394 was announced..
The video begins to play and we watch to see what happens.
Bill: Iris are you ready for a question and answer session?
Iris: Woof!
Bill: Iris what do you think of my opponent Sean Parker?
Iris: RUFF!
Bill: Iris I agree with your evaluation of Sean Parker. I see Sean as rough around the edges and I also see that this match is going to be rough on Sean as I am going to be extremely rough on him during the match. What else do you have to say about Sean Parker?
Iris: *Iris squats and pees* She then stands up and kicks her feet back like she does when she covers her pee or poop when Bill takes her for a potty break walk.
Bill: Ahhh!!! You are telling me that Sean Parker is terrified to be facing me in this match and that when he realizes what he got himself into he is likely to piss in his wrestling trunks. Is there anything else you wish to state Iris?
Iris: *Iris lets out a growl and a snort*
Bill: Oooooo!!! You really do not like Sean Parker eh? I also do not like him and I plan on making quick work of him in the match. Thanks for your time to answer my questions Iris.
Iris: Iris lets out a Woof! Bark! and a Yip! Then Iris rolls on her back to ask for a tummy rub but since Bill is on a video call with Iris he cannot reach out and rub her tummy.
Bill: Sorry Iris but we are half way around the world so you have to get our neighbor, Andrew, to rub your tummy and hug and kiss you as he is the one taking care of you until we return from this tour. Thanks for your time Iris!
The video call video ends and the camera person returns to a live shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart.
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS ON BILL’S BLAST FROM THE PAST TOURNAMENT MATCH
Bill: Well, Sean, soon we will step into the ring and finalize this Blast From The Past Tournament match. We do not have any history against each other in the ring. However there is important information I wish to relate to the viewers. I come into this match at 6 feet 4 inches in height and 240 pounds in weight. You come into this match at 5 feet 10 inches in height and 215 pounds in weight. With me having a 6 inch height advantage and 25 pounds of weight advantage over you when you are in the ring against me you become a major liability for your team.
Bea: Yep! Poor Sean is not going to fare well against you in the match.
Bill: And, Sean, if you somehow manage to get away from me and tag out to Luna for her to get into the match she will end up getting the stuffing beat out of her by Roux. So regardless of which one of you is the legal wrestler in the match you are going to be defeated by our team.
Bea: As the official, and legal, Manager for Bill I will be in the corner of Bill and Roux to ensure the Referee calls the match properly, that there is no cheating from Luna or Sean, and that their team does not hire interference in the match.
Bill: If you see poor calls by the Referee you need to inform them where they are failing. If you see Sean or Luna cheating and violating the rules then you need to inform the Referee of their cheating and rule breaking. And for sure if you spot people trying to interfere in the match you have to inform the Referee of the interference then you have full authority to beat down those who are trying to interfere in the match on behalf of Lune and Sean.
Bea: You know I am always aware of what is going on in, and around, your matches while I am serving as your Manager.
HOW DOES BILL BARNHART SEE OPPONENTS?
Bill: I will address you first, Sean, since Luna is not facing off against me in the ring as she has to face Roux. I am going to relate a situation that happened while I was driving around Lawrenceville, Georgia. As I am driving to get to the various locations I had a driver make an unusually stupid maneuver in their car. This idiot driver nearly hit several cars including mine. Then they tried to maneuver their car to get back into the correct lane of traffic but they were in such an odd position that it was taking them a long time and they had traffic backed up in both directions.
Bea: There sure are a lot of stupid drivers out there Bill.
Bill: Just like there are a lot of stupid wrestlers out there Bea. The next thing I know with this dumb ass driver is that they open their car door and get out of their car. So instead of trying to get their car back in the correct lane, to help clear up the traffic jam they caused, they are just standing there looking around like they did not do anything stupid.
Bea: Tell the viewers, and Sean and Luna, what you did next.
Bill: I got in the face of this idiot driver and gave them a verbal ass kicking. I screamed at them IF YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO DRIVE THEN GET THE HELL OUT OF YOUR CAR, THROW YOUR CAR KEYS AWAY, RETURN YOUR DRIVERS LICENSE TO THE GEORGIA DEPARTMENT OF DRIVER SERVICES, STHEN TAKE UBER INSTEAD OF BEING A HAZARD ON THE ROADS!!!
Bea: What did the driver do after you verbally kicked their ass?
Bill: They tried to turn it around to make me look like the person causing the trouble. I reminded them that they are causing the trouble and I am resolving their stupidity. They got back into their car and made a phone call. I yelled at them to make sure they call UBER to drive them around since they have no clue how to drive and they are a hazard to other drivers. Then I turned around and got back into my car and managed to get back into clear traffic.
Bea: How does that incident relate to your wrestling?
Bill: When I have to wrestle against moronic, stupid, inept, incompetent, and downright stupid, wrestlers I give them basically the same comment I gave to the stupid driver but it goes like this: IF YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO WRESTLE THEN GET THE HELL OUT OF THE WRESTLING RING AND GET THE HELL OUT OF THE SPORT OF WRESTLING INSTEAD OF BEING A HAZARD IN THE WRESTLING RING!!! I mean, come on Bea, if someone is an incompetent wrestler then their mistakes can cause harm to those they wrestle against. So they need to get out of the sport of wrestling and go into a safer line of work like maybe being a vendor of snacks at the wrestling events.
Bea: Ha ha ha!!! The mental image I just got from your comments has me amused.
CLOSING COMMENTS
Bill: Bea is there anything you wish to add to our comments for today before I launch into my closing comments?
Bea: Yes I do have an item I wish to bring up. For Into The Void XIII Management booked a Grudge Match between me and Nakita Niles. There is a saying that you should look before you dive into a swimming pool because there may not be water in the pool and you will crash and get hurt. Well, Nakita, you got the Grudge Match at Into The Void XIII and another saying goes BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR AS YOU MIGHT JUST GET IT. And, yes, you got it and will get it when I destroy you in our Grudge Match. My desire is that Management makes it a Hardcore Rules match so I can prove how great I am in Hardcore Rules matches. Thanks, Bill, for giving me time to present the truth to Nakita Niles. The rest of the air time is yours Bill.
Bill: Sean. . .you have no idea what your involvement in our match is going to mean for you. You are likely to have your wrestling career ended by the amount of damage I put on you. And NO, Sean, your Tag Team Partner, Luna, will not want to get into the ring and go one-on-one with Roux. If Luna does get tagged in then she will most likely immediately tag out to you so that you will be the one who receives the beat down to cause your team to lose the match instead of her.
Bill motions with a fist slamming into his other hand to show that he will squash Sean Parker like a bug.
Bill: Sean I ask you to please do not be upset when your Tag Team loses to me and Roux. If you are going to get upset over a loss in the sport of wrestling then you need to get out of the sport of wrestling and do some other line of work.
Bill laughs loudly.
Bill: I promise you that me and Roux will defeat you and Luna quickly so that your pain and suffering will not last for a long time. You will thank us for the quick loss you take to us once you realize we did you a favor of saving you from additional humiliation in the Blast From The Past Tournament. Your team’s loss to me and Roux will be so quick it will be quicker than a flash of lightning that knocks out the power. It will happen so quickly that you and Luna will have to watch the replay of the ending of our match as you will not be able to remember what happened to you two. I want you two to enjoy your lost as Roux and I are damn sure going to enjoy our win over you!
Bill informs the camera person that he is done with his comments for his Blast From The Past Tournament match. The camera person calls into the Network to inform them that Bill is done with his comments and they cut the feed to that camera and return to regularly scheduled programming for this time slot.
