Back on Track
Jet City South - San Diego
7th April 2021
OFF-Camera
Things were going well. Everything at the Gem’s mansion had become a well oiled routine. You would think so many ladies under the same roof would cause issues. I had never felt more at home than I have there though. I assume that Ruby was quickly becoming a big part of that. To be fair, I had found myself thinking about that more and more… especially when I shouldn’t be. Like now. My head bounced off the mat as I landed hard on my back. I wasn’t really focused on this, and I think Kris knew that.
Kris: You still have to be able to keep up!
To be fair, he knew what was coming. He always knew what was coming. I’m still not sure how he does it. It almost has to be second nature. Maybe I just haven’t been doing this whole thing long enough to be able to move that like. Better yet, maybe he was just born with better reflexes than most people. At least then I wouldn’t have to blame myself for the fact that he was always somehow a step ahead of me.
Court: I honestly don’t understand how you’re still so much faster than I am. I can keep up with Coby and I know that kid runs circles around you.
He lightly jogged around me on the mat. I so desperately wanted to reach out and trip him, but I knew that I would just be opening Pandora’s box if I tried. He was actually taking all of this seriously. If I broke down that wall and made it a game, I might lose any chance at making real progress.
Kris: The problem isn’t speed. The problem is that I can see what you want to do, and I know if I take that away from you, you’re screwed. Here, get up...
There was a time that I would have never taken his hand, but I let him pull me up to my feet. It felt almost effortless for him, even though he had never had the best physique on the roster. I had been winded for the last hour, but it seemed like he hadn’t even really gotten started.
Court: Feels like I am spending more time on the mat than on my feet in these sessions.
I didn’t expect him to pity me, and the shrug I got for complaining was the answer that I expected.
Kris: Better in these sessions than in the ring, right? You won last time out. Clearly we’re doing something right. You stuck to your game plan and everything went smoothly. What happens when it doesn’t? Come at me...
I already knew how it was going to end, but I was still going to give it my best shot. Ever since we figured out that my problems were with being overly aggressive while being a subpar striker we had been working on closing that gap. There was nobody better to teach me than someone whose entire offense was based on situational striking and using himself as a weapon. Everything Kris did was on a whim. He had no plan. His offense was whatever his opponents allowed him to do. It made him look like a genius in the ring, even though he couldn’t wrestle his way off of a mat on his best day. Still, I was absolutely no match for him face to face. Ten second after I lunged forward, I was back on the mat. I turned my head to look down at it sarcastically.
Court: Hello old friend...
Internally the mat and I were singing about being reunited and it feeling not good. I almost missed that he was still talking.
Kris: Why was I able to do that?
I could have been productive with my response. I didn’t go that route.
Court: ..because you’re the antichrist….
I was still looking at the mat, but I heard him laugh at me. The comment didn’t get him off track though. It’s possible that he might actually be dedicated to helping me this time around.
Kris: You dip your shoulder before you throw the jab. It didn’t dip, so I knew it was a fake. I caught the leg, and swept the other out from under you because you weren’t ready for me to counter you.
I sighed. It was the same thing every time. Of course, the moves were different. It just always ended up with me on my back. I was making a little progress. At first he was countering and putting me on the ground after each strike. I had noticed that as the days passed, I was keeping on my feet longer. I always ended up back down here though, and today I was nearing my limit.
Court: If your goal is to show me that I need to think more defensively, I already know that.
He must have been able to tell that I was getting legitimately frustrated, because he stood right overtop of me and looked down into my eyes.
Kris: You fight like Mikah. You want to bait your opponent into a mistake that you can take advantage of. That’s going to work against a lot of people, but it won’t make you the Bombshell Champion by itself. You’re going to have to start eliminating the tells in your offense. Everyone can see what you’re going to do a split second before you do it. People that thrive on defense are going to eat you alive. Luckily, you have Johanna up next.
He started to walk away and I sat up angrily. That last bit came out a little too casually to just let him exit stage right. Not even I was willing to sell my next opponent so short. I wasn’t going to let him fill my head with lies that the next one was going to somehow be easier than the last.
Court: You say that like it’s a good thing. She’s Wolfslair which makes it intimidating enough….
I must have struck a nerve because he whipped back around towards me, and his playful nature was gone. The times that Kris got serious were the times that he got scary. It was The Nobody still hanging out just under the skin. It definitely got my attention.
Kris: Yeah, and you’re Jet fucking City and don’t ever forget it. There’s a long list of companies that Jet City has run all over, including the one you’re working for. Wolfslair was impressive in SCW for about a half a second before we came back. Look at which one of us as been more dominant in the time since we’ve been around.
I wasn’t going to point out that our two teams hadn’t really had to cross paths much. It was easier to point out something that they had that we didn’t.
Court: They’re a bigger group than we are these days, lots of competitors in lots of companies….
He wasn’t having any kind of objection. This chip on his shoulder was almost as big as the one he carried around because of the GO Gym kids.
Kris: ...and in the limited time we have shared the ring together, they have failed. So enough with this bullshit intimidation stuff. You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t good enough to compete against the best, because that is just what we do.
I hadn’t been feeling like one of the best lately. I knew that he was coming from a good place, and that he was just trying to convince me to believe in myself, but I just couldn’t get behind it. I didn’t feel like I compared well against any of the Wolfslair members. They had all done more than me in less time. Not to mention the fact that Johanna looked like she could rip my arms off.
Court: ...yeah, you’re not the one that has to go out and fight a human tank….
He laughed, but this time it was in my face.
Kris: A tank, really? Stop being dramatic. You’re both the same height. She’s got you by like ten pounds, and maybe an inch or two worth of reach. Have you actually paid any attention to her offense though? Have you studied how she moves in the ring?
I had seen enough of her matches in passing to know what I was getting myself into. Plus, I had seen her backstage more than a handful of times. I felt like that was more than enough to give me a clear picture of what I was getting myself into.
Court: Similar to me. She uses aggression where I try to use speed. She’s like a blunt force objection, but only to soften people up before trying to choke them out. She uses that same running knee that Coby does, so that’s always fun to try and avoid.
The both of us have caught that one. Kris on purpose on more than one occasion. There was one time in the ring where I caught one by accident. Coby was just a little bit bigger than we were. The memory of it still haunted me a little bit. I wasn’t looking forward to reliving it in the ring at Climax Control. If she hits that, I wasn’t liking my chances of survival.
Kris: She has a simple offense. Pummel and pull apart. That’s it. Which means as soon as the bell rings, she is going to be the aggressor. She’s going to come at you, and she won’t stop until you make her. Do you not see how that plays right into your hands?
I could see why he was so carefree about it. Everything that we had been working on wasn’t really going to apply here. I didn’t need to have it all down right this minute. I should be able to match up well enough to Johanna with the skills that I already have.
Court: I can beat her the same way that people have been beating me for the last few months.
He nodded, and once again pulled me back up to my feet.
Kris: Exactly. All you have to do is sit back and counter. She is going to keep giving you opportunities to capitalize on. You just have to make them count. In the meantime, don’t get caught with that knee and you’ll be fine.
He had helped, but I still wasn’t sold on the whole thing being a walk in the park. It was still going to be a battle, no matter what Kris thought. Johanna wasn’t going to give up easily. After all, she was gunning for a championship, but also trying to establish herself as a threat in the division. I knew a little bit about that myself.
Court: As long as I don’t make the same mistakes that I have been….
Kris wasn’t going to let me feel bad for myself though. There wasn’t time for that at Jet City South. That stuff was already behind me. The only way we were allowed to move was forward.
Kris: Well, that’s what I’m for. I’ll be here most of the week. If I can pry you away from Ruby here and there, we can work on making you more unpredictable.
I reached out for his hand as he stepped away, but even as I brought up an elbow to his side, I could see that he was going to be able to block it with his free hand.
Court: Like this….
I released his wrist and dropped down in an attempt to sweep his legs out from under him, but he leaped overtop of my leg, and as I got back up, hit me with a hip toss that put me back down on the mat. It was a solid effort, but I wasn’t surprised to end up back on the mat. It didn’t sound like he was either.
Kris: No… but you’ll get there. It’s a slow climb back to the top kid. I’m awesome, and it still took me eight months. I believe in you.
I wasn’t sure why, but I believed him.
Court: ...at least someone does...
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>It feels good, you know?
The feed comes to life with Court in the center of the frame. The camera whizzes around, attached to a drone hovering above the former Blast from the Past winner. The sunshine beamed down, lighting up her face. The smile that she showed to the camera was much different than how she had appeared in the months and weeks leading up to Blaze of Glory. Jet City’s most impressive student looked more like herself than she had in years. For once, her life wasn’t in shambles. Personally things had been going well for a few weeks. Professionally, she had finally broken the streak and cut the weight that was hanging around her neck. For the first time in a long time, she felt free to be herself. That didn’t mean that she had delusions of grandeur though.
Let’s not get crazy. I’m not going to stand around going on and on about how one win has changed everything for me. I know that I am still at the very bottom of the Bombshell’s roster. I know that I still have a lot of work to do if I want to be able to get to the level people thought I was heading towards a few years ago. I am not going to act like Jessie Salco after a rare win. I realize that what I accomplished at Blaze of Glory was more for me than anyone else. Everyone else is going to point at my record, and my lack of success, and say that a win doesn’t change that. I get it, and nobody that is talking shit is wrong. I didn’t change anything about the bombshell division by beating Bella.
It wasn’t a lie. She realized that nobody else could see the things that she was feeling. They were internal. To everyone else it was all business as usual. One win in Court’s favor changed things in the division about as much as Jessie Salco beating her weeks ago. Simply: not at all. But for Court, it was everything.
What did change… was me. I feel different. My outlook has changed a little. The crushing weight that I have been carrying about for months is gone. I feel like I can breathe for the first time in forever. I’ll be honest. The losing streak was getting to me. It was starting to feel that no matter what I did, I couldn’t put it all together. I was starting to think that maybe I spent too much time away. I didn’t have the pacing down. I wasn’t reacting effectively to what my opponents were bringing to the match. The more I lost, the more I tried to forcibly overcome the problem. It felt like I got sloppy and then sloppier every week, and I was on a one way trip to getting dropped off this roster all together. I didn’t even realize how much pressure I had put on myself until after all of it dropped off my back. I didn’t realize that I wasn’t breathing until I could finally take a deep breath.
So in that small way, everything has changed. It may not like it from all of you on the outside looking in, but I can feel it. Maybe that won’t be enough to keep things rolling the right direction, but maybe it will be. Maybe this is where I start to pick up steam like I did when I first arrived in Sin City Wrestling. Anything is possible, especially now that I have been able to prove to myself that I CAN still rise to the occasion. I didn’t just come back to be some punching bag for the new faces in the company. I didn’t come back to be bullied by the ghosts of Christmas past that are still roaming the locker room. I didn’t come back for some losing streak and the embarrassment that came with it. I came back for so much more than that, and for the first time in a long time, it actually seems like a possibility.
If she was honest, she was more focused on making sure that the losing streak didn’t get restarted than she was about jumping back into the championship mix. That didn’t mean that she didn’t have lofty end goals though.
I have gotten a front row seat to every single person in Jet City finding success. I mean, The Black Sheep have been undefeated in the mixed tag division. Kris went on the roll of a lifetime that took him all the way to the World Heavyweight Championship. Mikah has yet to lose a match on her own, and Coby has been one hell of a Mixed Tag Team Champion. Even Ruby made her debut, only to win Blast from the Past just like I did a couple of years ago. Kyle Kavanagh carried that SCU Television Championship for an impressive amount of time considering he is by far the worst of the worst to come out of our gym. In the last year, the weakest link has been me. I was the one that originally showed all of the promise in the world, but I have been the only one unable to live up to the hype. My comeback tour has been just as difficult and heartbreaking as the years that I spent trying to get back SCW only to be stopped by injury after injury. Losing match after match has just felt like more of the same.
...but Blaze of Glory showed me that maybe there is a light at the end of the tunnel. There is a way back to the place that I used to be. I have the ability to go out to that ring and stand face-to-face with the best and the toughest. Casting aside my recent win, look at the beatings that I have taken from the majority of the Bombshell roster over the last few months. I have had matches with Evie, who is one of the best this company has ever had. I have been in the ring with Maki, who might be one of the scariest. Tempest recently tried to maim me, and I have been beaten or forced into submission several times since stepping back into the ring. But I’m still here. I’m still standing, and most importantly, I’ve stopped the skid.
It was a small victory, but a victory nonetheless. Kris had hammered into her that she needed to acknowledge those in order to keep moving forward. Nobody that anyone said or did could take that away from her. The streak was over. This was a new chapter in her career.
Some people are taking that as a return to form for me. As flattering as that is, I think it’s a little premature. Mark Ward shocked me as much as everyone else when he brought up the fact that I never got my match for the Bombshell Championship. I don’t think I have done anything lately to earn that kind of spot, and I have a feeling that the reward for winning Blast from the Past doesn’t have a three year shelf life. Having me jump to the front of the line after one win feels like a handout. I would rather earn that shot if and when I get back to that level. To be honest, I’m not even sure if I am in the running for any of the championships in this division. I mean, my partners in The Black Sheep are the Mixed Tag Team Champions, so it’s not like I’m going to be recruiting a partner to take them on. The Internet Championship feels a little too prestigious for someone coming off a losing streak, and it looks like the powers that be are already setting the table for the Bombshell Roulette Championship, and I find myself without a chair to sit in. As I have already said, I don’t think me and the Bombshell Championship are on a collision course any time soon, so being a champion in this company doesn’t feel like it is meant to be right now. It feels like I am meant to put in a little more work first. Maybe since the losing streak is over, I can string together some wins. Then I’d be comfortable with people floating my name towards the championship conversations.
Of course, she knew that none of her words would stop Mark or Christian from booking her as she saw fit. Court wasn’t going to turn down the opportunities if they came knocking. She just wasn’t going to start demanding anything without anything to show for herself.
Until then, the only thing that I want to do is be put in the ring with people that are going to force me to stay on top of my game. Mark and Christian seem to understand that, regardless of what they may say on social media. There is going to be a time and place for me to deal with what Tempest attempted to do at Blaze of Glory. There will be a time for championships. Right now though, my focus is on Johanna Krieger.
As the week went on, and she studied her opponent, she had become less intimidated. She thought that Kris’ advice was going to work. She was confident in her abilities, and wasn’t going to back down. Of course, it helped that she understood that her opponent was in a similar position.
I’m not even sure if people realize how intelligent this match really is. If there is anyone that is going to understand what it is like to be me, it is Johanna. I don’t say that lightly either. We are both part of wildly successful teams in this company. We both come out of gyms that have produced hall of famers across the globe. However, in this company, we are both at the bottom of those teams. I don’t say that as an insult either. It’s simply a fact. Nobody is going to rate Johanna above Alicia in SCW. Nobody is going to say that I am better than Mikah either. Who’s to say what would happen if Johanna or I were across the ring from our partners? It doesn’t change the way people view the dynamics in our groups though. I am stuck in Mikah’s shadow in the same way that Johanna is stuck in Alicia’s. I mean, Johanna wants a shot at the Internet Championship, right? Yet, it is Alicia with the opportunity to win and get into that match
...and SCW’s “Agent of Mayhem” is stuck way down the card in a match with me. Seems to be a far cry from what she was asking for, and it’s not like Johanna was undeserving. She has held championships in this company already. I haven’t even accomplished that much. Johanna is halfway to the Grand Slam already, and probably has a better record in this company than me. Yet, we are both at the bottom and looking up at a division full of women getting the opportunities that we hope eventually fall to us.
She shrugs.
Unfortunately for Johanna, I’m done waiting for those opportunities to fall down to the bottom of the ladder. I’m going to start working my way up, one rung at a time. If that means taking on people like Johanna… I’ll do that. If that means working my way back through the list of people that have beaten me recently, I’ll do that too. Wolfslair and Jet City aside, both Johanna and I want the same things. I’m pretty sure there’s only going to be space for one of us on this climb though. I’m going to need it to be me. Nothing personal, but this losing shit?
I’m over it.
