”Home Sweet Home”
Monday
18 June 2018
Pierce Residence -- Long Beach, California
[OFF-Camera]
I dreaded coming home. Not because I didn't love my parents. I loved them probably more than most kids seemed to love their parents. They were kind, supportive. Well supportive as long as what you were doing fit into their neat little box of what was acceptable. As you can imagine, wrestling was like a square peg in a round hole. My mother's badgering to come home was the reason I was here. It worked out though, after what went down with Ty, and with Mikah's stupidity, I needed the distraction. I willed myself up the front stoop and turned the knob. I knew my father was home because his blue lexus was parked in the drive. I suppose he took the afternoon off so he would be here when I got home.
Court: ”I’m home.”
The house was quiet. It was also immaculate. My mother worked nine to ten hours a day and still came home and picked up after my father. Speaking of which, my father was in the sitting room, one ankle crossed over his knee. His laptop was open on the coffee table but he gave me direct eye contact as I entered. He gives me his warm, loving smile before standing and moving toward me with long, athletic strides. Even though he hadn't been an athlete since his university days, he kept himself in good shape. He takes my bag from my fingers and sets it down on the floor beside the staircase, without breaking eye contact.
Marcus: “We missed you, sweetheart. Glad you could come home for a few days.”
My dad’s tone has always been warm and genuine to me and my mom, but I knew what it was like to witness his ‘President voice’. My dad was an accomplished surgeon and had earned his spot as president of the hospital. He rarely enters an operating room nowadays but he still worked long tedious hours. He opens his arms and like always I find myself both comforted and happy to be there.
Court: ”I missed you both too.”
My father was the more loving of both my parents. Not that my mom was not, but she was definitely the disciplinary figure in the Pierce household. My Dad made up for his long hours by spoiling both of us.
Marcus: “Hmpf.”
I know he's hurt by my absence for months. He steps back, composing himself. He wasn't great at showing emotions.
Court: ”I’m sorry. I have been busy training for the tournament and now finally, things are settling down. I wasn't avoiding this.”
It's a lie. And if it was my mom, she would have seen right through it. My Dad actually surprises me by not believing it either.
Marcus: “You have been avoiding your mother and I since we told you we disagreed with this decision.”
I hated disappointing him but I couldn't live for him. I had to follow my own heart, my own dreams. Even if they hated what I had chosen.
Court: ”Well, to be honest Dad, would you have gone back and seen grandpa if he constantly told you how much he hated your career choice?”
He nodded thoughtfully. It was no secret that I found it easier to talk to my dad. He was honest, open. He didn't try to guilt me with his feelings. Something I knew my mom would use against me.
Marcus: “I suppose that is a valid response. Look, honey, You know that I’m proud of all you have done. You went out there and were a Fierce Pierce...”
I hated when he said that. I rolled my eyes. He would include that particular phrase in every one of his pep talks growing up.
Court: ”Ug. Dad...”
He holds up a hand to quiet me.
Marcus: “I just think that maybe, you should consider some alternatives. You are still young. You have the intelligence to have your pick of universities. You don't have to be a doctor, but something... something that will not potentially leave you crippled one day.”
I had to hand it to him. He did have a point but I knew the risks the day I asked Mikah to train me. The risks were always going to be there. It hadn't changed my mind.
Court: ”Dad, This isn't just a phase. I like wrestling. I am good at it. Could you really see me being a doctor? I do not hold back my tongue. My bedside manner would suck. ”
My dad laughs. He knew I was right. Even if he would blow up with so much pride if I went in the medical field. I didn't have the will to be a doctor. In truth, any career that would have me dealing with face to face interaction on a regular basis would drive me insane.
Marcus: “I am never going to be completely behind you on this choice, Courtney but I will cheer you on, I love you no matter what your choices are. I am proud of you.”
I knew neither of my parents were going to be completely on board. However, knowing my Dad was proud of me, regardless, was enough. I would never admit that publicly though.
Court: ”So where's mom at?”
I would have thought my mom would drop everything for the chance to name off all the things that had made me a bad daughter. She enjoyed making backhanded quibs and guilting me into doing whatever she wanted.
Marcus: “Mom has a big realtor conference. She won't be back from San Jose until tomorrow. So it's just me and you kiddo. I was thinking we would hit up that pizza place you love and then some ice cream.”
I fully admit it. I am a Daddy's girl. At least when around my Dad. In the wrestling world though, I purposely avoided getting too much into personal stuff. I was aloof with everyone. Then I got a flashback of last Sunday and I can feel the anger boiling up. Why had he not cared that I was blowing him off?
Marcus: “Everything okay, sweetheart? ”
My lack of a response and the scowl across my lips obviously makes my Dad worry that I was upset with his suggestion.
Court: ”Yes. Sorry. I just... A co-worker and I had a bit a fight. Nothing major. Pizza and ice cream is perfect, especially with my favorite guy.”
He blushes a bit. He was never great with flattery. Maybe if he had been around more in my formative years I would have adapted more of his qualities. Not that I was mad. He was working hard, saving lives. Nothing more heroic than that.
Marcus: “Is it that big guy I saw on the show?”
Of all the shows my dad had to watch, he watched the one where I basically admit to sleeping with Ty.
Court: ”It's nothing dad. That guy is... was a mistake. Not one I will make again.”
My Dad smirks. Sometimes his support made me uncomfortable.
Marcus: “Well he’s a fool if he's not chasing after you.”
My dad moves to open the front door for me and I leave quickly, hoping that once we get in his car, the conversation will change. I wanted to forget that any of that entire episode ever happened.
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”Tripping Over Guilt”
Tuesday
19 June 2018
Pierce Residence -- Long Beach, California
[OFF-Camera]
Shelby:”So your Father tells me you are going to be quitting? I can't tell you how relieved we are over that news.”
My mom places a plate of waffles on the table in front of me. It was my grandmother's recipe. My mom only made them when she wanted something. She sits down in front of me. Her hair perfectly coiffed, her makeup perfect. She is already dressed in her red realtor’s jacket. I had grown up seeing her perfect smile on buses, billboards and bus stops.
Court: ”When did he say that I was quitting?”
I knew my dad didn't tell her that. She probably took one thing and twisted it to use against me. I suppose my mom and I locked horns so often was because we were so similar. I pour syrup on my breakfast, not giving her the satisfaction of my rising anger.
Shelby:”Your father told me that you went out for dinner and you talked about this... phase of yours. He mentioned university options and if you wanted, get a realtor license and work with me while you get a degree. And who knows, you might just work your way up...”
I hold up my hand to silence her. It was not the first time that this conversation had come up. She wanted to be a Mother-Daughter realty duo. It was something she had told me about since as far back as I could remember.
Court: ”Mom. Stop. I am not quitting. I am not going back to school and I am definitely not going to work in Realty. I respect what you do but it is just not me.”
She sighs loudly and exaggerated. My Dad always said she was the lead actress in the drama club in high school. It was not hard to believe.
Shelby:”You know how much stress this puts on your father? He didn't work long hours and push to give you a better life for you to become some... some... street fighter!”
She had been drinking coffee from a mug with her face on it. Our cupboard was full of them. One for every year she had been selling rich people houses they only brought to show off their wealth. She whimpers a bit, like she is,about to cry but I know better.
Court: ”Simmer down Shelby. For Fucksake. You can cut the fake water works. I was prepared for you to try and guilt me into quitting SCW. You use the same tactic every time. I know that you and Dad don't like what I do. I know you worry I will get injured or I will be desolate because the pay isn't great. But I am fine. I’m happy wrestling. ”
She is still pouting but nods her head.
Shelby:”We watched your winning match. The won where you won the opportunity. We are both proud of you Courty, we will always be, but you cannot make us like it. Just at least consider doing some college courses? Just as a backup. I think it would give us some peace of mind.”
I hated this. When she had valid points with good reasons for them. Still I couldn't let myself agree with her. Like I had told my Dad, I knew the risks of this profession. I was well aware that the simplest thing could ruin everything. It just didn't fill me with the same amount of dread that it did my parents.
Court: ”I’ll think about it.”
My mom smiles. It was enough to satisfy her for the time being. The fight wasn't over though.
Shelby:”So was that handsome guy you were mad at? Your Dad mentioned you yelling at someone on your show.”
This mistake is continuously coming back to haunt me. The thing was, it wasn't really a mistake. I wasn't out of my mind. He said I was prettier than Mikah and he wasn't lying to get anything from me. He meant it. I honestly thought that with his history that once would be enough. I was hoping he would want more. How dare he blow me off. That was my thing.
Court: ”It's nothing.”
My mom watches me intently and a smile turns up the corners of her red lips.
Shelby:”Nothing? Your Dad said he was quite attractive.“
What was with parents. They wanted to tell you what to be and who to date. I wasn't denying that Ty was attractive, I just didn't want a relationship.
Court: ”So? Do you have a point?”
My mom shrugs. She knows it is a moot point to continue this conversation but she had gotten what she wanted. She knew it was on my mind and it was bothering me.
Shelby:”There is nothing wrong with dating, Courtney. Do you know how long it has been since you have brought a boy home? I was starting to think you might be...
I glare at her.
Court: ”Don't even...”
Shelby:”Gay...”
I put a hand to my forehead. Was it okay to both love and hate someone equally? Because that is what I was currently thinking.
Court: ”I am not gay.”
Shelby:”It is perfectly fine if you are. You know that sort of thing doesn't bother us.”
She has this look on her face. And people wonder why I don't go home
Court: ”Mom! I am not gay. I like men. Alright?”
I am desperate for her to leave for work. Dad had taken today off so we could do some father-daughter things but My mom never took a day off.
Shelby:”Then bring the guy home to meet us sometime. Your Dad said it was a one time thing but you never know. I gotta run. Call when you get back home.”
Mom kisses my head and leaves me to stew. One of these days I would let her have it. Right now wasn't that time. I came for a little support, or maybe some reassurance but I wasn't going to get that here. It only made me feel justified in leaving to begin with. I waited for her to leave, and slipped out the door myself. What I was looking for wasn't here. It wasn't going to magically appear either.
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SCWrestling.net Exclusive
[Court]side: Live! [Smiles Faker Than The Chests!]
22 June 2018
”What is there to even say about Kira Phoenix? I mean honestly, go take a look at the last few Climax Controls. You may see her pop up standing next to her psycho significant other, but she says nothing. She does nothing.”
“When she competes in the SCW ring she either falls flat on her face, or pulls an upset that nobody saw coming. There is no in between for her. There is no consistency. She likes to say that she is just some wild child, but it's really just a lack of focus.”
“She can blame not moving further through Blast From The Past on her partner, but my partner was a rookie without any experience at all and we managed to win the whole damn thing. That's a far cry from being paired with a former champion and falling short in the early going.”
“...but that is not the only difference. I mean if you really want to get into it, just look at who shows up here. Watch back the shows and see me here competing, or at least backstage supporting this place. I show up every week, and I bust ass. If not, I at least have something to say. I at least prove that I want this.”
“I thought that being number one contender was going to have me going up against the best of the best in this company. I thought they would have to challenge me to see if I was serious. Instead, they throw someone at me that barely skated past Vargas and fell flat against Cat.”
“Maybe I set the bar too high. Maybe some of that rookie shine is starting to come off and I am starting to see that things aren't like I thought that they were going to be. My trainer is spotty. My contendership got invalidated by Crystal dragging her feet, and now I am put against someone that can’t even demonstrate that she wants to be around.”
“What am I going to do though? Put on a smile faker than the breasts around this place, show up, and do my fucking job.”
“The rest? If nobody else cares, why should I?”
