Blog: Almighty Fire
semana del 29 de abril del 5 de mayo de 2 0 1 8
I like to think we all live in our own little bubble, and why not? We’re creatures of habit, resistant to change or getting out of our comfort zone. Our bubble is one place where we can close off from the rest of the world. Yet life doesn’t always work out like that. We live our lives a certain way, and then just like that, something happens, and you realize one thing. Living in a bubble, it means different things to different people. But whether it’s not getting out of your comfort zone...or living in your own little world…or being delusional so much as creating a realm for yourself, there’s one thing we seem to realize in the end.
The thing about bubbles is that they burst.
In SCW, that lesson holds true. The Fallen were the most feared tag team in the Bombshells division, but it’s been awhile since anyone has seen Raynin and Gothika bask in the spotlight. Calvin Harris took SCW by storm when he joined the roster and quickly became world champion. But did anyone predict his entire stay would last less than a year? Or that his first world title reign, less than two months in, ended to Dmitri, of all people? Or that his second reign, which was much better, ended at Full Circle? Hell, the Mean Girls were the most hated stable, male or female, in the entire company. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, imagined Delia’s career would last just eighteen months. Or Liz’s three months, if that. Amanda joined Mean Girls and lasted eight months and seventeen matches. Celeste took over the group and she lasted less than two years and was lucky enough to compete in twenty matches total, Delia had twenty five when she was leading. Liz, only six. Veronica had more matches than the four of them combined. Granted, she had a combined five years across two tenures in SCW, but that’s pretty remarkable when she was really known for her tag titles runs and having never won a singles title until her fourth year in the company.
Oh, and looking up at the arena lights a lot. Hey, at least she ended Kate Steele’s title reign. So there’s that.
It’s sad to think that there’s not one Mean Girl member left in SCW. Well, except for, you know…me. That fact alone should scare most of you because I’m almost sure I was written off by most people before, during, and after joining the stable. I always knew I was going to be great. But I feel a little robbed when expectations aren’t met, or maybe my expectations sell me short. But even I’m not immune from the bubble burst. Into the Void is coming soon and this weekend at Climax Control is my last chance to right the ship before the supercard is announced, and I damn sure expect to be there in Vegas, come hell or high water. It’s just not the same without your #ChampionofChampions at Into the Void.
I made my pay-per-view debut there.
I competed in championship matches there.
I embarrassed Kate Steele there.
And I will be back for the sixth time there.
First things first, though, is someone who I’ve seen a few times over the last couple of months and I guess Christian seems to enjoy having me and Kira Phoenix facing one another. As if the past three times we met in that ring wasn’t enough, we’re going to be at it again at the go-home show and I hope Kira knows what she’s getting into because I’ve about reached my breaking point. I was denied my tenth championship in a match that I should have won and Crystal got lucky. Do I feel bad Diamond took the fall? Hey, better her than me, but I’m over it now. Odds are that Crystal or Cristina - or, as I like to call her, the woman ripping off Jon Dough’s shtick and doing an sad imitation of it – days as champion are numbered anyway, so I think a little karma will be coming her way in less than three weeks.
For now, it looks like I've got a lot of work to do if I'm going to make it to Into the Void. And like it or not, I have my work cut out for me against Kira. Look, the people who write up the match previews for SCW try to paint every competitor in the best light, but Kira being suggested as “probably the fastest rising rookie in the Bombshells Division”, despite the fact that she has one win to her name is a bit of a stretch. Hey, at least she has one win. I have zero in 2018. Thinking I’m going to fix that this Sunday at her expense.
So what is it about Kira anyway? Her past hidden in darkness, her present cloaked in secrets. I bet she has a great personality to go with the dark and gloomy stuff. Good, great, grand, wonderful. I mean, don't be ashamed, Kira. Whatever you do, I mean, stand up. Come into the light. Honestly, I never understood the whole goth thing, so maybe you can enlighten me? Evie Baang, The Fallen or The Angel Clan won't return my calls. I’m surprised after your match with Lucy that The Angel Clan, or even The Fallen, haven’t reached out to you yet. I’m sure you would have fit right in with either. Birds of a feather and all that.
Are you missing something in your life? Are you bored? Do you enjoy Poetry Night at the grunge club? Did you have a troubled childhood? Daddy issues, Mommy issues, abandonment issues? Fashion issues? Do you like the color black? Maybe you're looking to inflict all that hurt and pain on people? Are you looking to rebel against your parents, against society? Is this all an act, a total cry for attention?
Or maybe, just maybe, you're just stuck in the 90s.
At first, I thought you had a sunny deposition, rainbows, unicorns and Care Bears. Little did I know that your obsession is with death and the dark side, and Marilyn Manson. It's okay, totally understand, Kira. You have no friends other than Tommy, and he's messed up as it is. You're lonely, an outcast, a pariah. You're a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. And there's a good chance that my questions aren't going to be answered. It what's makes you, well, you.
No one may understand you, but just because no one understands you doesn't make you're an artist.
Don't get the wrong idea. I'm not here to offend you, I'm not here to make fun of you. I'm here to say you've not alone. I'm here to help you, sweetheart. I'm going to make you a star. I'm going to make you famous. You think I'm supposed to be intimated by skulls, chains, crosses, and whatever else, right? I'll get you my pretty and your little dog, too. Is that what you're going to tell me next, hmm?
**Hums Wicked Witch of the West theme**
Tell you what, Kira. You bring your cryptic speeches and your nursery rhymes and your petty little death threats. Bring everything you got. I don't always win matches, but when I do, it's usually against people like you who are old enough to know better but young enough to do it anyway.
~ ~ ~
The Excuse or The Reason
S A N T A M O N I C A • C A L I F O R N I A
? ? ?
Vierne por la mañana, 12 de mayo
Horario del Pacífico (Pacific Daylight Time)
We’re watching a pair of hands arrange photos in a book. Nature photos, abstract photos, portrait photos, each placed in its own compartment and arranged by date. With precisions and lightning speed, each page is filled with at least five of each category. One row has one less photo missing. The hand plucks a portrait image to fill the void. There. Perfecto.
Mercedes Vargas surveys her handiwork. Something about her expression. She momentarily looks up from her photo album, thinks for a moment, then begins to arrange photos again. A headache is coming on and now and again she’s straining from the pain in her neck. She’s tired and it’s easy to see the emotional strain on her face. Her eyes daring from one photo to the next.
Even on a week off, Mercedes doesn't rest from finding time to fill. She refers to the day’s schedule, which almost always not to go according to plan no matter how many times she went over her to-do list. Mercedes grabs a cup of tea within reach for a pick-me-up. The last two weeks, though, she needed something a little bit stronger. Mercedes declined another Cinco de Mayo party because she had other plans.. For the third time, a wrestling match fell on that day and for the third time, most recently last week, she was not a winner.
This time she lost the only title she’s held for well over nine months.
The week before she had just lost another title match, which was also a triple threat. What could have been, should have been, her tenth championship in SCW only turned out to be another episode in a whole list of episodes of disappointments.
Two weeks, two championship matches, nothing to show for either.
Now the day off can truly begin.
• • •
“Te ves cansado.”
“You look tired.”
“Gracias.”
"Thanks.”
It's the next morning. Mercedes stands on a mostly crowded bus as an older woman next to her strikes up a conversation.
Alguien no durmió lo suficiente anoche.
Someone didn't get enough sleep last night.
No debí haber si lo ve tan mal como.
I must not have if I look as bad as you say.
No he dicho eso. Sólo dije que te veías cansado.
I didn't say that. I just said you looked tired.
Mercedes looks out of the window. Between long flights, booking hotel reservations, finding time to work out at the gym and grab a bite to eat, and then heading to the next town, or country, after a match, sleep was more of a luxury. Such is the life of the weekend warrior. For most, like Mercedes, even the weekdays were occupied. Mercedes quickly turned back and gives the stranger a writhing look.
A baseball cap drawn over her brunette hair while wearing a heavy parka and shivering from the unnerving cold, Mercedes Vargas had to wait for the usual 34 that came at the 9:00 hour. She wished she had waited for the next one instead. Mercedes notices her stop and waits for the doors to open before she takes her leave.
Life is a lot like waiting at the bus stop. You have to wait for your ride. But that didn't mean she had to converse with strangers, no matter how inquisitive they were. She doesn't always take the bus, when she does, she would prefer to enjoy peace and quiet. Another day beckoned.
Carpe diem, or something like that.
~ ~ ~
Blog: That’s It, That’s All
semana del 6 al 12 de mayo 2 0 1 8
There comes a time where you have to stop fooling yourself into thinking that people are always going to be there when you fall. I was never one of those people. You want to know why? Because I know the only person you can rely on is yourself. No one there with me when I’ve been on this slide. The moment I finally end my losing streak, and I will, chances are I’m going to here 'Oh, you still have to prove yourself!' I have to prove myself again, huh? I’m already proven in this company. I don’t have to prove myself to anybody. That goes for fans, that goes for the lockerroom. Anybody. I’m well-proven in this company. If matches don’t go my way, then they don’t go my way, but I have to prove anything to anybody. I’m not a newcomer or the Jessie Salco’s and Joshua Acquin’s of the world. I get it, I'm delusional. I live in my own little bubble and people say that like it's a bad thing but nothing will change the fact that I’m going to build on my legacy until the day I do retire. And when that day comes, when I take my long overdue and rightful place in the Hall of Fame, I will be leaving a legacy that will be unmatched and will likely remain unequaled by any Bombshell past, present or future.
It’s hard to be humble when you’ve been successful like me. I never wanted this life, I don't need the free publicity. But just when I think I'm going to have a normal day for once, my name happens to come up in some form or fashion and it surprises me the mail I get on a regular basis – e-mail, snail mail, hate mail, voice mail – and the insults I get on Twitter. When I hear that I'm a has-been simply taking up space on the roster, you don't know how much that brings a smile to my face. Really, the insults never bother me. Success tends to give you think skin. That, and no one in the Bombshells Division has the ovaries to take me out, and they're not even going to try. Most tried to run down what I’ve done in other companies, others really tried to gloss over my accomplishments, but for as stupid and past my prime as some people think I am, what does it say when someone like me can outsmart a lot of the biggest names SCW has to offer? Granted, some didn't have the talent or the drive, but I do and that’s why I’m here and they’re not.
A few of the girls on the roster are younger, better, and will only continue to improve. I’m entering the twilight of my career and not even facing down the barrel of 40 and I accomplished more in half of my six years in SCW than the entire roster. Not just the Bombshells Division, the entire roster.
Forget that I have yet to win a match in 2018, I won’t harp on getting knocked out early from the Blast From the Past Tournament. And while I’m at it, letting another title match slip through my fingers two weeks ago still pisses me off, but l’m going find my inner Elsa and just let it go. It’s not the end of the world. Things will work out, they always do. If a match with Kira Phoenix is any sort of consolation prize, hey, I’ll take it. She wants a challenge? I'll be more than happy to give her one. The more I think about our match, the more I'm interested in seeing whether she will sink or swim here. As far as she's come along, she's barely keeping her head above water. After this weekend, Kira's career could go up in flames, if it hasn’t already. Someone's going to have to throw out a life raft to her soon or may be too late.
So go ahead, Kira, make my day.
Question my methods. Doubt my motives. Give me unprofessional nicknames. Just remember one thing, sweetheart: words are forgotten, threats aren't usually carried out, but results?
Results speak for themselves.
And when it comes to getting results, nobody does it better.
~ ~ ~
