The walk of shame…
It is one of the most embarrassing moments that any wrestler could go through. Your pride is shattered. Your ego is crushed. Feeling that embarrassment and having to endure that walk of shame can be one of the most cauterizing things to any wrestler’s confidence. At High Stakes, I took that walk of shame… those two fatal words being a sword of shame piercing my soul. I remember feeling wounded, and not just physically, when I walked up the ramp. This isn’t the first time I’ve ever dealt with such a cold, empty feeling. I walked through the curtains at High Stakes and the first thing I saw and heard was laughter.
I was surrounded by everyone laughing at me, some were pointing at me during the fact just to make it even worse for me.
“You always were a flash in the pan…” someone said to me as I walked by them.
“After all THAT?” I heard another person say with a laugh. “How can someone like you have ever been a world champion?”
I tried to ignore their words and their laughter… and then I ran into Myra Rivers who was also laughing at me.
“Wow…” Myra told me. “Maybe I was right about you all along… you know… from when I told you that you wouldn’t amount to much back in GCW?”
My eyes narrowed with anger at this point.
“You had a string of success for a while… but… you’re REALLY on a downward spiral now!”
Myra scoffed and laughed at me and while I wanted to punch the hell out of her, I passed and walked by her. I went down the hallway to get away from as many people as I could.
“Dad would be so embarrassed by you…” I heard. I turned around and was in for another surprise when I saw my brother Eddie standing there. He too, was laughing, which was so out of character. “You decide to be a rebel and you can’t even do THAT right!”
“This is what you get…” I heard the voice of my mother from the opposite direction. I turned to look at her and she had an ‘I told you so’ look on her face. “...you decided you wanted to separate yourself from the family and what do you do? You embarrass yourself on the biggest stage ever.”
“You’re the first person in our family that has… ‘quit’...” my brother said with a laugh.
“What are you both doing here?” I asked. “I don’t remember inviting you. You two didn’t have backstage passes! This is impossible!”
That embarrassment continued to flow through me as shame started to suffocate me as well. My brother and mother were both pointing and laughing at me to add further shame and I ran from them and straight to my locker room door. Wanting to get away from the shame, I opened the door and walked in thinking that it was going to be an escape from all the embarrassment, but once I walked in, a bunch of flash bulbs blinded me.
“There she is…” I heard a male voice say. “...the biggest embarrassment in professional wrestling tonight…”
“Who the fuck?” I asked as the flash bulbs died down.
“You’re over honey…” the voice said. When the dust settled, I was looking right into the face of…
“Perez Hilton? WHAT?”
Of everything possible that I could’ve ever imagined about High Stakes, an impromptu interview with Perez Hilton was the furthest thing from my mind.
“Soooo…. Andrea….” Perez stated as he shoved a microphone in my face. “How does it feel to be the biggest quitter in SCW?”
Embarrassed and flabbergasted, I couldn’t even form a thought… let alone a word.
“What’s it feel like getting your ass kicked by MY GIRL Christina Rose? Personally, I thought you looked fabulous saying ‘I quit’ like the little bitch that you are! You’re officially Christina’s bitch! Wear it with pride, girlfriend!”
I opened my mouth to try to say something, but I realized that my throat was dry.
“What’s it feel like knowing that you wasted ALL of your potential and that you’ve officially completed the biggest collapse in the division in 2020?”
“Here we go with this exaggerated crap again…”
“It’s not exaggerated, darling! It’s true! You’re another Kanye… you know… a parent dies and their career is never the same? You were the best in the world and now? You’re nothing! You’re OVER, sweetheart!”
“Get out of my way!” I said as I shoved Perez Hilton to the ground. I grabbed my stuff and walked through the bathroom to the locker room which led to the exit from the building. However, inexplicably, I wasn’t in the parking lot. I walked into another room where a party was going on.
“WHAT?” I said. “Where did THIS come from?”
“IT’S THE ANDREA HERNANDEZ IS OVER PARTY!!!!!!!!” I heard the shrill, annoying voice of my lifelong friend Chelsea LeClair as she began to approach me. I saw posters of me getting pelted with tomatoes, my own merchandise being thrown into a bonfire in the middle of the party, pro-Christina propaganda spread all over the place and cardboard cutouts of me being trampled all over the floor.
“...Chelsea…”
“You had your time, Andrea… but… it’s over! You’ll NEVER be relevant in this business again!” Chelsea blew a streamer in my face, laughing at me as she walked by. I felt like crying at this point, but the worst was about to happen…
“How does it feel to know you can’t do it without me?” I heard the voice of my father. Frightened and embarrassed, I turned toward the voice and there he was in the flesh laughing at me like everyone else… and he also had a screwdriver in his hand. “Now hold still…”
He grabbed me around the throat, subduing me. I kept saying “No” with increased panic as he slowly brought that screwdriver closer and closer to my left eye. I was barely able to scream when he was an inch away… and when I got that scream out…
I woke up….
November 23, 2020
The morning after the High Stakes event, I found myself on a hospital bed. The feeling of terror was flowing through me as I remembered how vivid the nightmare I just had was. But more than that, the feeling of cauterizing embarrassment was drowning my conscience. My hands felt numb. My heart felt like it was beating at 100 miles an hour. I felt my face just to make sure both of my eyes were still there. I wanted to cry, but I held back.
“Andrea…” I heard the voice of Chelsea LeClair say. I looked at her and I was already feeling angry.
“Get away from me…” I said to her. “Did you have a fun ANDREA IS OVER party?”
“...what are you talking about? There wasn’t a party.”
“...what? I could’ve sworn… my mom and my brother were laughing at me in the locker room and…”
“They’re in Sedona…” Chelsea said with confusion. “...you had a really bad dream just now, didn’t you?”
“Yes…” my anger increased a little and suddenly, I hid any vulnerabilities I was expressing at that point. “...it was a bad dream. No big deal. By the way, Perez Hilton isn’t in Vegas is he?”
“Um… no….”
“What the FUCK are you doing here anyway?”
“I came here to check on you, silly…”
This didn’t amuse me at all.
“Get out”
“No… I’m here to make sure that…”
“SAVE IT! Let me guess, my family sent you here, didn’t they? You’re here so you can LECTURE ME about my behavior and my ‘mistakes’, right? Oh wait… I get it. You’re here to TURN ME BACK INTO THE OLD ANDREA, AREN’T YOU?”
The anger within me was certainly numbing the pain and the embarrassment I was feeling right now.
“Is this the part where my lifelong friend sees me at my ‘most vulnerable’ and tries to talk me into ‘repenting’ and ‘regretting’ and vowing to go on this ‘road to redemption’? Is that why you’re here? Is this the part where you try to persuade me to ‘embrace the family legacy’ again? They put you up to this… DIDN’T THEY? If this is all why you’re here… you can turn around and GET THE FUCK OUT because I’m NOT falling for ANY of it…”
Chelsea doesn’t get deterred by my anger at all, maintaining her look of concern for me.
“I came here on my own, Andrea. Your family didn’t send me to do anything. I promise, I’m only here to check up on you and see if you’re okay. All of that stuff you mentioned… I’m not here for any of that because I know I’m wasting my time. I know nothing I will say will cause any of that to happen. You’ve made your choices and I’m going to let you live with those. Don’t try to hide behind the anger… I know you’re hurting…”
This definitely caused me to calm down.
“Your pride is bruised heavily, isn’t it? Don’t lie to me. High Stakes was more embarrassing for you than losing the Bombshells World Championship.”
“You have the door shut, right?”
Chelsea temporarily steps aside to reveal that this is indeed the case.
“You’re right…” I said with a bitter tone in my voice, the embarrassment seeping into me further. “It’s the most embarrassing moment of my entire Sin City Wrestling career. Losing the world title… that was embarrassing enough… but that feels like a mere pittance compared to what I am feeling right now. I have to go back to that locker room… and I have to endure all the two-faced bitches bringing up High Stakes and the words ‘I Quit’ toward me every chance they get… for MONTHS… it’s going to be shoved in my face for MONTHS and they’re not going to let me forget it…”
“I don’t think that’s true… but you’re the one that has to figure that herself. There is one big difference though… between Into the Void and High Stakes…”
“What’s that?”
“At least after Into the Void, you had so many people supporting you. But now? Think about what you’ve lost Andrea… and I’m not just talking about the match last night…”
“What ARE you talking about?”
“After Into the Void… you had your friends, you had your family, you had your fans… and in some way, shape or form, they helped you get through all of that. But now? You have NONE of that! You have NOBODY to help you get through this… except for Clarissa… but she can only do so much. I tried to help you get through that summer, remember? I tried to inspire you prior to your rematch, remember?”
“Unfortunately…”
“But I can’t help you… because I’d be enabling what you’re doing. You cast everyone aside, Andrea! You cast me aside because you’ve always had this attitude that you’re above me and above my help. You cast Myra aside because you don’t want to forgive her for GCW. Your mother and your brother love you more than anything and you pushed them away too. Your fans stood behind you because you were a small town’s dream! You inspired the small town people just like yourself to accomplish their dreams just like you did. You pushed it all away, Andrea. You have to deal with this embarrassment all by YOURSELF! You pushed away anyone in SCW that could’ve ever been your friend by being selfish and keeping to yourself. You gave up the opportunity to pass the torch to the next generation in your family. You didn’t just lose that match last night… you lost ALL of that…”
“Maybe I did…” I said with defiance. “But it was all holding me down and holding me back. I don’t need to pass down ANYTHING to ANYONE. I don’t need friends in SCW. I don’t need to inspire anyone. I don’t need that crap!”
“You can make that choice…” Chelsea said. “...but you’ll have to live with the consequences. Some day, you’re going to realize what you’ve thrown away… and I’m not talking about your career, your potential, or anything like that. I’m not shallow like some of the girls you work with. You’ve thrown away everyone that helped you get to where you are right now. Every obstacle, every loss, every moment of embarrassment… you’re going to have to deal with it ALONE… and some day, you’ll realize the errors of your ways…”
I rolled my eyes and scoffed at Chelsea, which didn’t deter her at all.
“I regret nothing…” I said. “...the old Andrea will NEVER come back… she was nothing but a weak, pathetic little BITCH… SHE’S the reason why I lost last night…”
“This is exactly why I was never going to try to get you to come around. You can shrug off the consequences… you can regret nothing… you can act like dealing with all of this mostly alone isn’t going to bother you… but I’ve known you for almost 20 years now. Some day, this is all going to come back to destroy you.”
Chelsea gets up and begins to walk toward the door. She sighs, giving an indication as to how hard this conversation is for her.
“The day you decide that the ‘old’ Andrea wasn’t the problem and that there was never anything wrong with her… I’ll be there to support you. But until then? Goodbye, Andrea.”
I was left surprised at how Chelsea handled the whole conversation as she opened the door and walked out of the room leaving me alone. This temporary moment of surprise was quickly replaced by anger and bitterness… not toward Chelsea, not toward Christina, not toward SCW, not even toward my father or my family… but toward the ‘old’ Andrea that I was suddenly finding a significant hatred for…
December 8, 2020
“This is all your fault…”
I was saying this to a cardboard cutout of the “old”, “pre-makeover” Andrea Hernandez in a Vegas training facility as my bitterness toward the old me only grew.
“...I lost at High Stakes because of YOU! I had that match in my hands, you know that, right? You know that I was close to ending her career, right? But NO… YOU still had to exist within me somehow! YOU… being WEAK as FUCK… decide to get involved! YOU showed too much mercy toward Christina! But that’s par for the course, isn’t it, daddy’s little girl? You always were a weak, sad sack of SHIT!”
I heard the door open behind me but I didn’t think much of it as I kept blaming the ‘old’ Andrea for everything.
“You have ALWAYS allowed all of the BULLSHIT to happen… the summer of hell, GCW, UWA, OCW… all because you were always SOFT… all because you were happy with being DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL and maintaining a horrible family legacy! I thought changing my ways would get rid of you… but it DIDN’T! Why do you still exist inside of me?”
I walked over to a nearby table that had my duffle bag on it. I opened it up and looked at a screwdriver that I had placed in it. Instantly, I was getting High Stakes flashbacks. Instantly, I was feeling the anger, the shame and the embarrassment all over again. I wasn’t admitting it, but I knew that I wasn’t over it. Going into High Stakes, I had figured that if I had lost the match to Christina Rose, I’d be able to get over it right away and just be happy that she was out of the picture. But, I was feeling sick to my stomach when I realized that wasn’t the case. That whole match flashed through my head. The ending remained attached to my conscience and it wouldn’t let go. Hearing Christina announced as the winner all over again made me want to punch a wall. I could feel my lungs shrink and my breath shorten.
“WHY AM I NOT OVER IT?!?!?!” I screamed as I grabbed the sledgehammer and walked back to the cardboard cutout. “I SHOULD’VE BEEN ABLE TO MOVE ON, BUT I CAN’T! Are you feeling GUILTY over what you did to that bitch now? ARE YOU? Is that what this is? Is that why I CAN’T GET OVER HIGH STAKES? SCREW YOU!”
In a moment of irony, I stabbed that cardboard cutout of myself right in the eye with the screwdriver and shoved it right down to the floor as my bitterness over High Stakes continued to grow and flow within me.
“What the hell are you doing?” I heard the familiar voice of Clarissa Vega say, much to my surprise. I turned around to see her and I was feeling embarrassed for a completely different reason.
“What does it LOOK like I’m doing?”
Clarissa reacted to this with a look of concern, a sigh and a shake of the head.
“Yes, I saw all of that. What is going on? This is insane…”
“It’s sticking with me Clarissa…” I said with a sigh. “High Stakes… I don’t know why I can’t get over it… but I can’t get over it. I feel embarrassed… and angry… and feeling like I want to find Christina Rose and assault the crap out of her until I snap her fucking neck. I can’t let it go! I can’t let HER go! SHE gets to have the last word? SHE gets to have the last laugh? It CAN’T end like that…”
“You made a promise to me that when this thing at High Stakes was over… that it was OVER” Clarissa reminded me. “I understand how embarrassing that night was for you, but you made that promise and you said you were going to be the bigger person. You didn’t mention her yesterday which is good but if you’re not over it… you’re going to find herself trashing her all over the place and looking like an idiot because you broke your own promise. Plus… the way you treated Willow was… well… over the top. It’s been more than two weeks since High Stakes, Andrea. Let it go…”
“That’s the hardest part in all of this…” I reminded Clarissa. “That promise. I made that promise because that’s how sure I was that I was going to beat her. And now with that promise… I’ll NEVER be able to avenge that embarrassment…”
“Still… it’s over now and you’re NOT going to try to get back at her.”
“And what? Swallow that embarrassment for the rest of my fucking career? The rest of the Bombshells are NEVER going to let me forget it. They’ll NEVER let me live it down. No matter how much I’m going to try to move on, every opponent for MONTHS is going to try to remind me of it and they’re going to rub it in my face! You and I both know that! This is the most embarrassing loss of my whole career… not just SCW… but… all of it…”
“That’s debatable…” Clarissa said. “You’ve been through some tough times. I know Evie was an embarrassment to you and it lead to that summer, but you were able to bounce back and silence those idiots, remember? After you took the world by storm after what you did to Christina, people weren’t throwing Evie in your face anymore… except for her daughter, but she’s an idiot. You went on that tear through the Hilton family and you silenced all that, remember?”
“Yeah… but now they have something else to rub in…”
“Look, I’m just trying to put things into perspective. You and I both know that you’ve overcome a lot worse than this. The summer of hell is the hardest thing you’re going to deal with in SCW for some time to come. Remember in OCW when you were on that Death March team in that four on four tournament and how the other team assaulted the hell out of all of you and you were embarrassed by being the first elimination without even getting any offense in?”
“Fuck…” I said with a more calm tone, remembering that. “...that was fucking embarrassing. But a month later, I was OCW Craze Champion.”
“Remember in UWA when you lost that Cruiserweight title match to Cam Knowles and you were considered the joke of the whole division with everyone laughing at you every week? Look how that turned out. You’re one of the best wrestlers in the world, even now. Most of those idiots are gone from this business. In the long run, you proved yourself to be better than them.”
Clarissa reminding me of overcoming similar situations was certainly beginning to calm me down and soften my stance about High Stakes. The embarrassment hadn’t gone away just yet, but I could feel it finally begin to dissipate.
“And don’t forget Myra…” Clarissa reminded me. “She would constantly and publicly embarrass you back in GCW… on social media, on television… remember when she ripped your top off and whipped you with a belt in front of the whole world?”
That mention caused me to narrow my eyes and even cringe a little bit, indicating that even now, there’s still some trauma from that humiliation flowing through me.
“I take back what I said about High Stakes… that wasn’t the most embarrassing moment of my career. What you just mentioned was…”
“Exactly! You shut Myra up, did you not? You proved her wrong, did you not? You eventually became a singles champion in GCW for the first time setting the foundation for the wrestler that you are right now. You got through all of that and I know you can get through this too.”
“I don’t know how…” I said. “...this one… it really hurts… now I HAVE an unquestionable, undeniable loss to HER on my record… and that ALONE is damaging to my own pride. But the fact that it’s going to get brought up for months? That’s going to make it even harder to get over. They’re not going to shut the fuck up about it.”
“So? Let them be a bunch of petty bitches…” Clarissa said. “You and I both know that the SCW Bombshells locker room is full of them. You’re smart enough to figure out exactly what to say about all of that. You did dominate her well before High Stakes and you did take a world title from her. On top of that, you retained against her. You might have to remind those idiots about it ad nauseum for a while, but at the end of the day? You shouldn’t give so much of a shit about what they think. They don’t know you the way I know you… they especially don’t know you the way you know yourself. They don’t define your truth. You do! Raise hell, sister! Don’t stop now over High Stakes! You’re far too good not to come back from this and become a two time world champion next year! That’s how you’re going to rise above this and shut those people up!”
“You’re not wrong…” I said with a sigh. “...if they feel the need to rub that in my face, then that’s a reflection on THEM, not me. I’m sorry you had to see that…”
I paused, glancing at the cardboard cutout of the old me with the screwdriver that was put right through its eye.
“...I was going through a lot… you know… with that embarrassment and everything…”
“What would you do without me?” Clarissa asked. I wasn’t laughing because I knew she was the only person I really had to lean on at this point. “I hope I don’t walk into you doing something… you know… ‘crazy’ like stabbing a cardboard cutout of yourself in the eye again…”
“Sorry… but… about your question….I don’t want to think about that. I’m going to figure out a way to just… get this emotion out of me in the best, healthiest way that I can so I can move on from High Stakes… and so I can move on from Christina Rose once and for all…”
“I’ll let you figure that out! But for god’s sake Andrea… don’t lose your head over this.” Clarissa said with an assuring smile as she turned and walked out of the facility. Being in a much calmer state of mind, the embarrassment and that bitterness was starting to fade. I sat down alone, trying to figure out how I was going to get past that embarrassment that was High Stakes.
“Someone’s going to pay for this…” I said with an angry defiance as I tried to figure out where to go from here...
December 11, 2020
I was in my hotel room with the camera next to me. I was ready to express my thoughts regarding my upcoming match against Krystal Wolfe among other things, but first, there was some personal business that I had wanted to put to bed. The camera was OFF at this point as I sat by a shredder with a notebook and pen in hand. There was still some High Stakes related bitterness inside of me as I began to write something down…
“Christina…”
I took a pause as just seeing that name angered me.
“You’re never going to read this letter. These words will never be put out there. I’m never going to congratulate you at High Stakes. I am writing this letter to you to do what you haven’t done since High Stakes: move on. Oh you didn’t think I noticed that needless tweet you threw in my direction after the show? You didn’t think I noticed your pathetic segment where you were insinuating that I would publicly bash you? Oh you idiotic, stupid, egotistical, self serving bitch! I made a vow that I was going to move forward and not focus on you and that’s a promise that I’m living up to. So you won at High Stakes. Okay. But who won the war? It was ME! I took the world title from you. I retained that same title against you. No matter how much you want to pretend that it does, beating me at High Stakes doesn’t erase that. It took you what? Four tries to win one on one? The three times that I beat you, I beat you straight up. No weapons. No nonsense. It took a hardcore stipulation and a fucking screwdriver to beat me when I never needed to stoop to such crap to do the same to you… three times.
So who really won, then?
I’M the real winner! I’M the one that has proven that I can be relevant without you. You NEEDED to win at High Stakes to fulfill your own ego. What? You expect me to congratulate you for finally doing so? No. You name drop me even AFTER the fact because you NEED to bring up my name in public to be relevant. You go on camera after the fact and STILL can’t go ONE show without mentioning me. You STILL wanted to communicate with me after the show. Unbelievable! Even after High Stakes, you’re STILL trying to force your way into my life? It’s over.
This is the last I’ll ever even THINK so extensively of you. I’m living up to my word and moving on. The fact that you’re STILL dropping my name says it all. I realize that the only way I will truly move on from you is if I never mention you again and pretend as if you never existed… within reason of course.
So don’t @ me anymore. I’m never responding to your garbage.
Keep name dropping me and inflate that High Stakes win. Act like you won the war! But deep down? You didn’t. You won ONCE against me. Compared to what I was able to accomplish, it PALES in comparison. Deep down in your horrible ego, you know that but you’ll never admit to it. Goodbye Crystal… Christina… whatever name you choose to run with this week.
Hope you enjoy the ONE battle you won… because when you put it all together?
The real winner of the war is ME… and with time… I’d say 5 years… when I’m dominating the wrestling world and you’re thankfully cancelled from this business, there won’t be a damn person that remembers what happened at High Stakes.
Mark my words…
Andrea.”
After writing those final words, I ripped the page out of my notebook and immediately put it through the shredder letting out some final feelings in my own, private personal space… feelings that were never going to go out in public. This helped me move past High Stakes some as I walked to the camera to turn it on. The embarrassment, in large part, may have finally faded from me… but the bitterness? The anger? Pieces of both emotions were still inside of me and are definitely going to be going into Sunday… and they were surely still within me as I began to express my thoughts…
“I bet you all enjoyed that didn’t you… my High Stakes experience. Yeah, go ahead and laugh it up. Go ahead and spend the next few months throwing that shit in my face. Seriously! I know most of you are going to do that because most of the bombshells roster is that fucking predictable but before you throw that in my face, I just wanted to remind you that IF you do this… if you remind me of High Stakes… if you use that to mock me… you know what this means? It means that for one, you’re all predictable. It also means that YOU feel the need to bring it up to me. It also means that YOU feel the need to bring it up to bring ME down. So who does that reflect more on? Me? Or you? Now that I got that out of the way… yeah… I’ll own it. It WAS embarrassing for me? Happy now? You shouldn’t be… because what that experience did for me was make me even MORE determined to get back to where I belong as the SCW Bombshells World Champion. I don’t fucking care if I have to start from the bottom and tear my way through back to the top… the moment that I am the world champion again, you’re ALL going to be SILENCED and the ONLY one laughing will be ME! What? You thought I was just going to cower and hide and drop down to the fucking Internet division? As tempting as taking that title from my own mentor would be, that’s beneath me! Hmm… that’s ONE misconception about me down the drain.
Maybe some of you in that locker room were hoping and praying that my High Stakes experience would make me ‘think about what I’ve done’ and express remorse and regret and make me realize the ‘error of my ways’. I bet some of you wanted me to be all ‘I’m SO SORRY… please forgive me.’ No. I may have hated how High Stakes ended but I regret NOTHING! I have no remorse for ANYTHING! I have no remorse for bashing her face into that monitor. I’ll NEVER apologize for fucking up Seleana in that street fight after the fact. I’ll NEVER apologize for putting that brat nosed BITCH in her place in that cage and all the hell I EVER caused that trash ass family. In other words…
High… Stakes… Changes… NOTHING!
I’m STILL Andrea fucking Hernandez whether you fucking two-faced bitches like it or not. It was ONE setback… but you’re damn right I’m bitter about it. You’re damn right I’m angry about it. Going into this match… I’m REALLY pissed off… and I get to ruin your dream, Krystal Wolfe. Sunday’s going to be a big day for you with your big debut and all. You’re no “wolf”, Krystal. You’re a lamb. You have SUCH a big bravado wanting to face a big name in your debut… and you end up getting ME. You’re in the worst case scenario dealing with someone with a LOT of anger to take out! Congrats! YOU’RE the person that I’m going to take out so much anger, bitterness and frustration on… not because I hate you, but because you just happened to have a terrible luck of the draw! Are you regretting wanting a big name opponent now? Granted… I DO look at you… and I’m disgusted. You remind me WAY too much of OLD Andrea… and it makes me SICK! I’m not going to pretend that I know every part of your history… but let’s break down what it is about you that sickens me…
The way you LOOK… it gives me ‘outcast’ vibes… I can relate to that because for many years, in this business, that’s what I was.
The way you ARE… oh you’re a gamer and a YouTuber… INSTANT NERD! You know who used to be that once upon a time in her life? ME!
Family… you TOO wanted to distance yourself from your family, didn’t you? You TOO had issues with your father, right? It’s like you’re some sort of carbon copy of a younger Andrea Hernandez or something. Maybe this match won’t be as much of a nuisance as I thought. I get to beat a carbon copy of the WEAKLING that I was? The thing is though, Krystal… there is ONE big difference between you and OLD Andrea…
OLD Andrea actually accomplished quite a bit in this business. What about you? What’s YOUR claim to fame? Beating a past-her-prime Veronica Taylor at Climax Control 272? Winning some SCU vs. GRIME match at High Stakes where you were a bit player at best? Fighting GRIME over and over again to mixed results? Chasing titles but NEVER winning one? Seriously… what have you even DONE in SCU that even WARRANTS you being on this roster? Off the top of my head, I can name five women on that roster right now that are better than you: Halo Williams, Dahlia Rotten, Angel Kash, Cordelia Clark, Merlot Ayano. If SCW brought up ANY of those five, I’d be THRILLED because those women have gone and done things in this business. But instead of any of those five, we get YOU?
The BIT PLAYER in the never ending SCU-Grime war?
The woman that was standing in the shadow of Ariana Angelos?
The woman that has lost to the likes of Valentina and Cordelia who deserve the SCW roster spot far more than you do? I get it… it’s not a WHOLE promotion! You’re pulling double duty which… that’s not the smartest thing in the world… yet you want to come up here and promote yourself like you’re some hot new thing! Sorry to break the news to you, Krystal. You’re NOT! It’s bizarre that someone who wasn’t even a top five woman on the SCU roster happens to be on the SCW roster now, but it is what it is. You think you’re good enough to play with the big girls now? You poor, pathetic fool… stretching out far beyond your means. You were probably hoping you could just come in and capitalize off of my High Stakes win and get a big win in your big debut, right? Or were you hoping that I was going to just look past you and not take you seriously, thus opening the door for an ‘upset’? Either way? IT’S NOT HAPPENING! I’m NOT going to let it happen, Krystal! YOU DO NOT GET TO CAPITALIZE OFF OF MY DEFEAT!
YOU DO NOT GET TO USE MY NAME AS A MEANS TO BOOST YOURS!
I’m NOT going to let it fucking happen, Krystal!
And I’ve got some news for you too. Even if… GOD FORBID… you won on Sunday, it STILL wouldn’t be the most embarrassing moment of my Sin City Wrestling career. It wouldn’t even surpass High Stakes. Being the World Champion and having a bunch of two-faced bitches fucking trash me because they couldn’t handle me and then losing the title to one of those two faced bitches? THAT was more embarrassing. Being taken out EARLY in a battle royal by MERCEDES VARGAS was more fucking embarrassing than losing to you would be. But still, I’m not going to let that happen. In fact, let me ask you something so you can understand what is going to happen on Sunday. What’s the most embarrassing moment of your career so far? Can you think of one? It wouldn’t match mine, but that’s not the point. I want you to remember that really quick because what I’m about to put you through on Sunday is going to surpass whatever your most embarrassing moment is. Let me tell you what kind of embarrassment I felt at High Stakes.
First off? My pride was wounded. Not shattered… but it very much was wounded.
Secondly, I felt incredibly SICK… sick to the point where I wanted to throw up.
I was so fucking embarrassed, Krystal, that I didn’t even WANT to stay in SCW and face up to the whole thing. I wanted to just hide and get away from it all.
I felt, for a moment, that all of the progress that I had made since Summer XXXtreme was gone. There I was doubting myself all over again. There I was, questioning everything. I felt as close to the pinnacle of humiliation that you could ever feel minus losing a world championship… or suffering a loss to Twisted Sister…
You have NEVER… EVER experienced that type of embarrassment, Krystal. You being so inexperienced, you don’t know what it’s like to have your pride torn out of you and wounded until it’s almost dead! You could never know what it’s like to be so DISGUSTED in yourself for losing a match to the point where you feel nauseous because you’ve never experienced a loss in your career that would make you feel that way. You’ve never lost a match that made you want to quit. You’ve never had a loss that made you really TRULY doubt yourself and had you feeling so much humiliation! You’ve probably had an embarrassing loss or two in your young career… but never… anything… like… THAT!
You’re too fucking inexperienced and too damn innocent to know what true humiliation in this business is. You don’t know nearly enough to know what it takes to make it to the top. You come in here as the shiny new thing thinking that you got it all figured out, but I was there… where you are right now… having no clue what adversity in this business is all about. You REALLY don’t have a clue as to what being beaten down constantly, being told over and over that you’re nothing, being told repeatedly that you’ll never amount to anything, being mocked and ridiculed over your most embarrassing losses, dealing with people SLANDERING YOU CONSTANTLY, twisting your words and making mountains out of molehills for every single stumble or fall that you have, idiots scrutinizing every single word you say and every single thing that you do… you have NO CLUE as to what ANY of that is about. You may know professional wrestling, but you REALLY don’t know this business, Krystal. Just because you were trained by Odette and Gabriel doesn’t make you SHIT! You have never experienced ANYTHING that I’ve just described because the worst that you ever experienced in SCU with that never ending GRIME war is a cupcake compared to the shit I’ve dealt with in my entire CAREER… ESPECIALLY in Sin City Wrestling throughout ALL of 2020! Think about that before you pick apart my shortcomings this year like the dime-a-dozen bitch you probably are… because the same shit that you’re probably going to pick me apart for is the same shit that makes me BETTER than you because you’ve NEVER experienced any of that!
But on Sunday… you’re going to for the first time. When I unleash a whole lot of anger and frustration out on you, you’re going to know what true humiliation is. You’re getting thrown into the fire here, Krystal. You’ll get a taste of what this business is really about. I’m going to do whatever I can to rob you of your innocence because you’re coming into this as the naive little lamb that has no idea what she signed up for. When I’m done with you, you’re going to realize that you’re nowhere near as ready for the big leagues as you thought you were and that this is far too soon for you. I’m going to make you regret wanting to face someone like me… and believe me when I say that you’re facing me at the wrong time. Sunday night, I’m going to use YOU to send a message to this division that they’ve gotten their last laugh on me. Once they see what I do to you, they’ll know that in 2021 and beyond, I am going to REIGN over this division the way nobody ever has before! This entire year, even when I was the good girl, I was nothing but hated, slandered and defiled all out of pure, BULLSHIT jealousy… well Krystal… when I’m done with you… and when I eventually become the SCW Bombshells World Champion again sometime in 2021, this division is going to have a REAL reason to hate me!
I took a rare pause during a promo, deciding to let my anger flow through me. Part of me was still feeling that anger and that bitterness from high stakes, but at the same time I was partially feeling like I was definitely going through something therapeutic.
“You’re nothing but two things to me, Krystal…
A message… a “FUCK YOU” message… to a division that has never, EVER appreciated ANY of the hard work, the blood, the sweat and the tears I’ve put into this company. The fact that I got up after the summer of hell and went on a TEAR prior to High Stakes at ALL should be ADMIRED… but NOOOO… it gets VILIFIED just because it’s ME! The fact that I am even here NOW after High Stakes when 99% of all wrestlers that go through the same shit I did that night would fucking RETIRE is a testament to how resilient I am… but NOOOOO…. “Everybody hates Andrea” has been the fucking POPULAR THING AROUND HERE since the one on one match I had with Alicia Lukas.
You’re CATHARSIS to me… and that’s the second and final thing… you’re the person that I get to unleash a whole year’s worth of anger, bitterness and frustration out on. YOU’RE the person that gets to pay for the sins of a two faced locker room that NEVER appreciated me or ANYTHING that I gave to this company that gave it EVERYTHING it wanted: someone motivated that was going to change the game, take this company by storm and show that ANYONE more than talented enough can come into this company, raise some hell and make things happen. I gave this division… I gave this company… EVERYTHING it could ever ask for out of a newcomer… and every single bitch in this trash ass locker room in one form or another threw it back in my face! It’s not fair that YOU are the one that pays for the sins of many…
...but has the way all the women here treated me since I got here fair?
No.
That’s the business, Krystal… and I got nothing to apologize for… not for Violent Conduct, not for High Stakes… and not for what’s about to happen to you…
With all of that in mind, with that anger and bitterness flowing through me, I got up and shut off the camera having no remorse or regrets for anything I just said… feeling perfectly justified for all of it!
