RP Title: “Holy Diver!”
It was time for Into the Void IX and Caleb’s rematch with Tiberius the Great of Elysia, the set up was simple, the two men fought in Tiberius’s second match in SCW where the holy man cheated to beat Caleb and the following week Caleb laid down a challenge for a rematch contested under Roulette Rules to take place at Into the Void IX, obviously Tiberius accepted the challenge as the two men where now set to face off, can Caleb avenge his defeat?
Walking Lemmy, Las Vegas, Nevada
Friday the 29th of May 2020, 11:00am
Even whilst we’re in Lockdown, the doggo needs his exercise.
And before anyone cries out, yes we’re wearing the facemasks, until they build one that can fit around a dog’s head Lemmy is the only one among us who isn’t wearing a mask but last I checked the Corona Virus didn’t spread to dogs (thank god) so he should be okay,
You know what’s not okay though? Whoever put the card together for Into the Void made me sound like a sore loser! Namely by leaving out the fact that Tiberius had cheated to win our match! I even provided a replay of the end of that match when I issued the challenge for this rematch and that’s the thanks I get? I swear SCW must employ some of the worst interns ever!
But that’s enough of that rant, at least for now, what matters to me is the fact that I’m avenging that loss next week at Into the Void and if that Roulette Wheel lands on a stipulation that favors me then I’m all for it!
“I swear, the amount of times Lemmy has stopped to pee on this walk, you’d think he’d have gotten into the hotel’s water supply.” Katie commented half-jokingly as Lemmy finished his latest pee and raced up to catch up with us tail wagging all the way. “But at least we won’t run into Despayre and his hippo or Alex with his rhino out here.”
“Yeah, you’d think we’d have heard something about two long haired guys taking their pet hippo and pet rhino for a walk if we did.” I nodded in agreement as I tightened my grip on Lemmy’s lead, why? Because I spotted another Labrador being walked across the street from us and I didn’t feel like being dragged across the street, not to mention social distancing and not knowing if the other dog is as friendly as Lenmy but fortunately that dog and its owner passed without incident.
“That almost sounds like a story for WTFIWWY.” Katie joked referring to a web comedy news show about the stupidity of the human race, feel free to make your own conclusions about what the abbreviation stands for. “Seriously though, I say we give it another twenty minutes or so of walking before we turn back and head to the hotel, my feet are killing me, but I know there’s a nice spot for me to rest my feet.”
“You’ve been down this road more times than I have since we moved to Vegas.” I responded with a shrug as we walked around. “Where abouts is it?”
“It’s right outside of some church, don’t ask me what kind of church or any other specifics, I don’t exactly make a habit of going inside religious buildings.” Katie responded and I could feel a lightbulb going off in my head as I got an idea for the trash talk portion of the promo, and Katie apparently noticed that too. “You are not doing your promo in that church!”
“Why not?” I asked as we neared the building itself. “My opponent’s a holy man!”
“Well, for one thing, your wearing your Behemoth The Satanist shirt.” Katie pointed out as she motioned to my shirt and I glanced down at it, and yes, I did choose this shirt because of who I’m facing at Into the Void IX. “And even if you cover up, you’ll probably burst into flames the moment you step into the building! And I’m fairly sure they don’t allow dogs in church!”
“I’ll give you Lemmy’s lead before I go in; I think he needs the rest just as much as you do.” I responded as I motioned to Lemmy who was panting pretty heavily, then again, I couldn’t tell if that was because of the Vegas heat, all the walking he’s been doing or both. “And yes, I will cover up, and you got ion my case for wearing a leather jacket in today’s weather.”
“Just saying, there are easier ways to bake yourself alive.” Katie joked before we reached the bench and as promised I handed her the lead as Lemmy plopped down on the floor by her feet. “If you really are serious about this, I’ll get some Death Metal playing as soon as we get back.” Katie commented as I zipped up my jacket and was thankful that I wasn’t wearing my battle jacket with THAT Cradle of Filth t-shirt on the back, just google Cradle of Filth Jesus is a and you’ll get the idea. “At least be quick about it before you burst into flames.”
“Deal.” I responded before carefully stepping over Lemmy’s legs and heading into the church grounds, fortunately the church was pretty empty and anyone who worked at the church as probably somewhere else in the building, even so the fact that this place is clearly open for business despite the pandemic makes me wonder why they are considered essential as I got ready to do my promo.
“Last time I faced Tiberius I ended my promo by quoting a line from the bible, I still plan on doing that but until then I am conducting this promo from inside a church, why? Because I’m facing a holy man next week at Into the Void and this seems appropriate! Well, more appropriate compared to how my first match with Tiberius the Great of Elysia, or Tibby as me and Jason Adams like to call him, ended which was omitted from the card preview!”
Seriously, what the hell?!
“So yeah, thanks to whoever wrote the card preview for making me look like a sore loser! Just to be clear, I would’ve been fine taking a clean loss but no, HolyMcHolyPants just had to go and cheat to win the match proving himself to be quite the Judas Priest and not the Holy Diver that he made himself out to be! At least with this match being contested under Roulette Rules I won’t have to worry about HolyMcHolyPants cheating to beat me again if it lands on a stip that favors me.”
Where the hell did, I pull “HolyMcHolyPants” out from?!
“But that’s the way of the Roulette Wheel sometimes! I’ve been in SCW long enough to know that it can go either way and I’ve got my one reign as SCW Roulette Champion to prove it whilst this is Tiberius’s first ever Roulette Rules Match! Now I’m pretty sure the bible frowns upon gambling but if it does then Tiberius should’ve taken that into account when he accepted this challenge but he didn’t and now he has to live with it and the consequences of him accepting my challenge to a rematch!”
It’s a roll of the dice, or spin of the wheel in this case.
“But with any luck that wheel will land on a stip that favors me and my style of wrestling over Tiberius and his cheating ways! Which brings me to my next point, why would a holy man feel the need to cheat to win his match in the first place? It’s almost like he’s a massive hypocrite or something isn’t it? I’m not going to say any more on the subject just in case I get struck by lightning for bad mouthing holy man in a church, but you and the Good Shepherds are cut from the same cloth!”
And with that I decided to wrap things up.
“I decided that Tibby is too good a nickname for a blatant cheater like Tiberius so from now on I’m giving him a new name, HolyMcHolyPants might claim to be a man of god but his actions inside of the ring have proven otherwise, just look at his last match against Kedron Williams! I was at ringside for that match! HolyMcHolyPants had better brace himself because there’s a biblical metal storm coming and the “Metal Storm” Caleb Storms is out for vengeance with this bible quote on the topic: For we know him who said “Vengeance is mice, I will repay” and again, “The Lord will judge his people”, Hebrews 10:30, look it up!”
I left the church as the scene fades.