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61
Climax Control Archives / I WILL BLIND YOU WITH MY SHINE
« on: February 23, 2022, 06:18:02 PM »
* Senor Vinnie and Pete the Cactus used by permission of Gerrit *

I WILL BLIND YOU WITH MY SHINE

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart has a match scheduled for Climax Control 324 against Mercedes Vargas. This is the second time Bea is facing off against Mercedes so we will see how she does this time around.

CLEAN UP ON AISLE THREE

We are taken back about one year when Bea Barnhart was shopping at the Kroger Grocery Store located at 950 Herrington Road in Lawrenceville, Georgia, which is near the home of her and Bill and Iris. Bea is pushing her shopping cart up and down the aisles looking for the items on her shopping list. She turns the corner and starts to go down Aisle Three when she is blocked by the cart of a woman shopper. Although the aisles in Kroger are wide enough for two carts to pass each other this woman shopper had her cart in a position that blocked Bea from going down the aisle. Bea, being a nice person, politely asks the woman to move her cart so she can get by.

Bea:  Excuse me? Could you please move your shopping cart a bit so I could get by?

The woman shopper is either ignoring Bea or she cannot hear Bea talking to her so Bea again asks her but in a louder voice.

Bea:  Excuse me! Could you please move your shopping cart a bit so I could get by?

Again the woman either cannot hear Bea or she is deliberately ignoring her. Bea goes a bit louder this time.

Bea:  Excuse me! Could you please move your shopping cart a bit so I could get by?

For the third time the woman fails to respond and move her cart. Bea reaches out and gently moves the woman’s shopping cart about one foot so she can get her own cart past the woman’s cart. This is when the woman gets upset and responds.

Woman Shopper:  What the hell are you doing? You don’t touch my shopping cart! Who do you think you are?

Bea:  Excuse me but I politely asked you to please move your shopping cart so I could get by and you apparently ignored me. So I moved your car1 one foot so I could get my cart by and you have a problem with that? It isn’t your cart anyway as it belongs to Kroger! And, by the way, I’m Bea Barnhart, one of the Superstar wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling Federation.

The angry woman shopper takes offense to Bea and she charges at Bea but Bea easily side-steps the woman’s attack which causes the woman to slam into the shelves in the aisles and items fall off the shelf onto the store floor. The woman gets up and again tries to hit Bea but Bea easily out-maneuvers the woman. The woman again charges at Bea but Bea ducks under her attempt and flips the ignorant woman over her head where she lands in her own shopping cart causing the shopping cart to flip over and lands on top of the angry woman who is nearly unconscious now. The Assistant Manager of Kroger walks down the aisle and informs Bea they have the incident she had with the woman on surveillance camera if she wishes to sue the woman for her attack. Bea tells the Assistant Manager that kicking the woman’s ass is enough punishment for the woman. Bea continues her shopping with a smile on her face while the Assistant Manager makes an announcement for his Employees over the announcing system.

Kroger Assistant Manager:  Can I have several employees to clean up the spill on Aisle Three? Thanks!

Bea hears the Assistant Manager’s announcement of the spill to be cleaned up on aisle three and she cannot help but burst out laughing.

Bea:  HA HA HAR!!! That will teach others that you don’t take me lightly and you damn sure don’t attack me!

Bea continues shopping as the scene fades out.

LAYING OUT THE TRUTH TO MERCEDES. . .

The scene switches and we are in the hotel room of Bea and Bill Barnhart. The camera person is already set up and ready to broadcast Bea’s comments for her upcoming match. Bea and Bill have a very nice room that includes a small sauna area. Bill is running around searching for Iris as she seems to have gone hiding on him again. While Bill hunts down Iris to get her to stay out of trouble Bea sits down on the couch to present her comments for her upcoming match with Mercedes Vargas.

Bea:  So, Mercedes, we meet again. It looks like Management has an interest in me to move up and start challenging for Championships again. I know what you’re probably thinking Mercedes. We had one match a long time ago. It was at Climax Control 277 on August 23, 2020. Since I started my wrestling career in January 2020 I didn’t have many matches when we met at Climax Control 277. I know you want to take me lightly because I don’t have as many wins as you have over your long career but taking me lightly will cause you to lose our upcoming match. I remember an incident where some jerk woman shopper at Kroger Grocery Store thought I wasn’t a threat when I politely asked her to move her shopping cart and she refused to move it. Then when I moved her cart a mere one foot so I could move my cart down the aisle she wasn’t just verbal in her assault on me for touching “her” cart. She decided to lunge at me and attack me. I easily side-stepped her pathetic attempts to inflict harm on me and I left her laying on the floor of Aisle Three while I continued shopping. Do you want to take me lightly Mercedes? You can talk about the matches I haven’t won lately but looking at your performance lately you’re not doing much better than me. That changes this Sunday evening when I soundly defeat you and move up in the rankings while you get defeated and move down in the rankings.

WHERE’S IRIS?

Bill walks around the hotel room continuing to look for Iris. Bea is not happy that Bill is walking through her camera shot.

Bea:  What’s up with you looking for Iris? This hotel room isn’t exceptionally large so there can’t be many places where Iris can hide. Are you sure you didn’t leave the door open and she might be out in the hallway roaming around?

Bill:  I’m sure Iris is inside the hotel room hiding. I think she believes I’m going to take her for a bath and you know how she gets when it is bath time. I’ll continue having a look around. . .

Bill is interrupted in mid-sentence by a loud knocking on the hotel room door. Bill answers the door to see Senor Vinnie at the door. Bill invites Vinnie in. Vinnie, Bill, and Bea, get into a conversation about Iris.

Bea:  Ahem! Boys! Please make this quick as I’m airing comments for my match at Climax Control 324.

Senor Vinnie:  Bill have you seen Pete? I’ve looked everywhere for him but can’t find him. I thought maybe he was here visiting Iris.

Bill:  Nope. Pete isn’t here. In fact I’ve been looking everywhere for Iris. She’s usually good at hiding from me when she thinks I’m going to give her a bath but this seems to be something different.

As Bill and Vinnie look around the room they hear a noise coming from the small sauna in their hotel room. Bill, Vinnie, and Bea, look over at the door to the sauna. The door slowly opens and they see Pete the Cactus strut out of the sauna with a towel wrapped around him and he’s humming to himself. Pete is smoking a cigar he is holding in one hand and sipping a mixed drink he is holding in his other hand. Right after Pete comes out of the sauna Iris walks out and she has a small towel on her head and another one around her backside and she has a huge grin on her face. Bill looks at Vinnie and Vinnie looks at Bill and then the two of them and Bea look at Pete and Iris.

Bill:  Iris!!!

Senor Vinnie:  Pete!!!

Bill:  Come on Vinnie! You need to get control of Pete!

Senor Vinnie:  What? As if Iris is under control? You need to focus on getting her under control also. I think Iris is corrupting Pete.

Bill:  Iris? Corrupting Pete? More like the other way around! You know how the saying goes right? Driving Pete to be corrupt is a very short drive.

Bill and Vinnie realize they honestly aren’t going to control either Iris or Pete, as those two will do whatever they want, so they burst out laughing, then high five each other, shake hands, and then they look at Bea who has a stern look on her face.

Bea:  Iris! Pete! You two get over here now! Bill! Vinnie! You two get over here also!

Pete and Iris slowly walk over and stand in front of Bea. Bill and Vinnie stand a bit away from Bea not knowing how upset she really is.

Bea:  Iris you get in your room and get ready for bed now! How dare you scare us like that going into the sauna with Pete without letting us know where you were. And as for you, Pete, you go with Senor Vinnie, and get back to your hotel room. I’m going to deal with you and Iris tomorrow. And as for you, Bill, and you  Vinnie, you two need to watch over Iris and Pete more closely than you’re doing. If you don’t take control of Pete and Iris I’ll damn sure take control of all of you! Sheesh! Now you four get out of here so I can continue with my comments for my upcoming match.

Vinnie takes Pete and they leave the hotel room to return to their own room. Bill walks off with Iris to bring her into her room to settle in for the evening. The camera returns to focus on Bea.

LAYING OUT THE TRUTH TO MERCEDES. . .CONTINUED

Bea:  Well I took care of those four quickly. And on Sunday evening I’m going to take care of you quickly Mercedes. In fact an incident that I observed recently near our home in Lawrenceville, Georgia, is a perfect representation of how unobservant and uncaring you are.

Bea picks up a bottle of iced tea and takes a drink.

Bea:  I believe the laws concerning Police chasing someone in their car, or a fire truck or ambulance on a call, with sirens blaring, is universal. When you’re driving and you hear a siren from an emergency vehicle you are to stop and give them way. Even more important is that if you are at an intersection and you hear the sirens you’re to stay put and not cross the intersection as the emergency vehicles have the right of way.

Bea drinks more iced tea before continuing.

Bea:  Here’s an incident me and Bill observed about a month ago while we were driving down Herrington Road and we were at the intersection of Herrington Road and Cruse road. We were stopped at the red light on Herrington. We could clearly hear numerous sirens blaring so we knew either a fire truck, ambulance, or police car, was coming toward the intersection but we didn’t know from which direction. About fifteen seconds later it was clear the sirens were coming from Cruse road toward the intersection with Herrington Road where we were located. At that time the signal for us on Herrington Road was red and the signal for Cruse Road was green. Then the signal changed to where it was red for Cruse Road and green for Herrington Road where we were located. Although we had the green light on Herrington Road the law states the emergency vehicles with their sirens and lights on have the right of way and can go through the intersection even though the light for them was red. The law states to stay where you are and not attempt to cross an intersection when you hear sirens even though you have the green light. So what does the car in front of us do? They hit the gas and fly into the middle of the intersection just when the Ambulance comes up Cruse Road to go through the intersection. The driver of the car that drove into the intersection freaked out when they say the Ambulance so they hit their brakes stopping in the middle of the intersection and nearly got broadsided by the Ambulance. That’s pure stupidity on their part. That’s moronic behavior not understanding what could have happened to them. It is an arrogant mindset and it could have ended up with them getting seriously injured or killed.

Bea finishes her iced tea.

Bea:  Why did I tell you that incident Mercedes? I told you that incident because you’re like the dumb ass driver who failed to obey the laws and nearly got themselves injured or killed. They didn’t stay put in their car. They heard the sirens like we did. They decided to cross the intersection just as the ambulance came hurtling through the intersection. Then when these jerks realized they made a huge mistake they got so scared that instead of clearing the intersection they slammed on their brakes and stopped in front of the ambulance and nearly got broadsided. So, Mercedes, if you want to be like that driver who made a hazardous maneuver that could have ended horribly bad for them then do so. If you want to fail to obey the rules and laws then do so. If you make a decision that puts you in harm’s way then do so. Just remember that whatever you do I’ll counter it and take advantage of your mistakes and take you out. I’m on the move up the ladder of success and Management has taken notice of me. You, on the other hand, are well beyond your expiration date and you need to be disposed of like a container of out-of-expiration-date spoiled milk.

LOOK TO THE FUTURE…DON’T DWELL ON THE PAST

Bea:  I’ve noticed something about you Mercedes. From the comments I hear from other wrestlers they also noticed it. You dwell on the past. I admit you had a very nice past and held many Championships and some of them for a long reign. However, recently, you’ve been losing a lot of matches. You seem to forget that there is a thing called the future and the future isn’t always kind when it comes to aging wrestlers. When you held all those Championships and were able to successfully defend them you were younger. Now as you’re getting older you seem to dwell on the past as you have nothing from the present to brag about and damn sure you have nothing in your future that you can be proud of.

Bea flashes a huge grin into the camera.

Bea:  Mercedes if you happen to get a win over me in our match I’ll be honest and go public and commend you on the victory. But, Mercedes, that is a huge IF you can defeat me. However when I defeat you everyone will see you do what you always do when you lose a match. You get on camera and Twitter and bitch, moan, complain, and claim the loss you took was invalid even though your opponent legally defeated you. Then you will go off and list all the Championships you’ve held, how long you held them, and how, overall, have a better list of accomplishments than everyone else on the Roster. That’s a major difference between us Mercedes. Where you have to boast about things that used to be. . .you have to brag about past accomplishments. . .you have to claim your opponent didn’t legally defeat you. . .I tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. You need to be damn glad they don’t hook you up to a Polygraph machine because with all the lies you tell the Lie Detector machine would explode.

Bea bursts out laughing then regains her composure to continue with her comments.

Bea:  Be honest with yourself Mercedes. Stop trying to be what you were years ago. You don’t have now what you had then. All your smack talk won’t get you a win in our match. All your smack talk won’t get you shots at Championships. All your smack talk will get you is a beat down and having my hand raised in victory. You are the past of Sin City Wrestling and I’m the future of Sin City Wrestling. Deal with it!

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments for today. The camera person calls into the Network and they tell them to cut their camera feed and they do and our screen goes black.


62
Climax Control Archives / BLAST FROM THE PAST TOURNAMENT QUALFIER MATCH
« on: February 09, 2022, 09:20:40 AM »
BLAST FROM THE PAST TOURNAMENT QUALIFIER

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart and Masque are facing Kat Jones and Mark Cross in the Blast From The Past Tournament. Winning this Qualifier match advances Masque and Bill into the next round of the Tournament on their way to winning the Tournament.

SHOPPING AT KROGER SUPERMARKET

The scene on our screen changes and we see Bill Barnhart at the Kroger Supermarket on the corner of Cruse Road and Herrington Road in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The camera person assigned to Bill follows him around the store while he shops.

Bill:  While most wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling like to show you their sparring matches, or them having a drinking party where they get drunk, or male wrestlers intimidating and attacking women, or some other things that come across as the same old thing being the same old thing, I’m original, and honest, and willing to show you my real life adventures in addition to my wrestling abilities. Although I’m a wrestler in Sin City Wrestling I’m also a citizen of the community where I live. I shop at this Kroger Supermarket in Lawrenceville all the time. When I’m purchasing a lot of items I’ll drive my vehicle here to load my purchases in. If I only have a few items to get the walk from our house to this Kroger Supermarket is about five minutes. So please sit back and relax and watch me shop as I enjoy shopping. I’ll get to my comments concerning our Blast From The Past Tournament match at Climax Control 322 after I return home from shopping.

While going up and down the aisles Bill sees a young mother with three kids ranging from 1 year old to maybe 4 to 6 years old. She is looking up toward the top shelves, and it is obvious she is not tall enough to reach items on the top shelf, even more so with three young kids to attend to, so Bill stops to offer assistance.

Bill:  Hi. Is there anything I could help you get from the top shelf since you have three small children to watch while you’re shopping?

Woman:  DOES IT LOOK LIKE I NEED HELP?

Bill:  Geez! No need to be a asshole about it! I’m just trying to help out in case you need something off the top shelf. It is hard for anyone to reach up to the shelves and even more so when you have three young children to take care of while shopping.

Woman:  I DON’T NEED YOUR F*CKING HELP!

Bill:  What? Gawd! I hope you’re not married! Wouldn’t want to know that some poor man has to put up with your bitchy attitude all the time. This is the thanks I get for offering assistance to you? That’s messed up!

The woman storms off down the aisle and disappears when she turns the corner. Bill continues his shopping and when he turns down one of the aisles to browse the products he sees the woman again and this time she’s on her cell phone. Since she’s talking with a man on speaker mode Bill assumes the person she’s talking to is her husband. Bill stops and listens to the conversation.

Woman: THERE’S SOME GUY HERE IN KROGER ASKING ME IF I NEED HELP TO GET SOMETHING OFF THE TOP SHELF. DO I LOOK LIKE I NEED F*CKING HELP? WHY DON’T YOU COME HERE TO KROGER AND KICK HIS ASS!

Knowing the woman is on speaker talking with her husband and telling him to come down to Kroger to confront him and attack him Bill gets into the conversation.

Bill:  Ooooo so you’re telling your husband to come to Kroger and attack me huh? Yeah come on down here and try to attack me and I’ll lay your ass out in the aisle while your smart ass wife watches. I did nothing wrong except offer to get something off the top shelf for her as she has your three young children with her while she’s shopping. Your wife goes off on me, then you go off on me, then you threaten me? Bring it on because if you lay a finger on me I’ll knock you out and you’ll be arrested by the police.

Bill listens for the woman to confirm that her husband is coming down to attack me. After Bill hears her tell her husband not to come down to Kroger as he is likely to get hurt badly by Bill the woman hangs up the phone and tries to apologize to Bill.

Woman:  Uh. . .uh. . .I’m really sorry about what happened. It isn’t easy to do grocery shopping with three small children coming along. My husband isn’t much help taking care of them. Can we just part and go our own way and forget this happened?

Bill agrees as he feels bad that the husband of this woman is a jerk. The woman walks to the checkout lane to check out. Bill continues shopping and when he’s done he goes through the self-checkout and pays for his items. The camera person follows Bill into the parking lot. After Bill loads his Hyundai Santa Fe with his purchases the camera person gets into their car to follow Bill to his home where they will continue to air Bill’s comments for his Blast From The Past Tournament match.

BACK AT BILL’S HOME

Bill and the camera person arrive at Bill’s home in a very short time since Kroger Supermarket is less than a half mile from his home. Bill brings his purchases into the house while the cameraman sets up their equipment in the living room. The camera goes live and the camera person focuses on Bill as he puts his purchases away. When Bill is done he walks over and sits on the couch. Bill is then joined by his wife, Bea, and their English Bulldog Iris, on the couch.

Bill:  Iris I need to ask you something before I go into my comments for my upcoming match. When Pete the Cactus called you for a video call this morning how come I heard the music YOU ROCKED ME ALL NIGHT LONG by AC/DC play?

Iris turns her face away from Daddy Bill.

Bill:  I know you were in the house all night but for you to have that song play when Pete calls you for a video call is not appropriate as it gives people the idea some stuff is going on that shouldn’t be going on. So, Iris, what are you gonna do about it?

Iris lets out a groan then shoves her head under Daddy Bill’s arm and Bill pets her and Iris calms down and lays her head on Daddy Bill’s lap.

Bea:  Iris we’ll have a talk later. Right now Daddy Bill needs to air comments on his upcoming match.

Iris:  *SIGH*

THE KEY IN THE BLAST FROM THE PAST TOURNAMENT IS HAVING AN OUTSTANDING TAG TEAM PARTNER

Bill:  Holy Sh*t Batman!!! I knew Masque was talented, interesting, dark, and aggressive, but now after hearing her comment on our upcoming Blast From The Past Tournament match against Kat Jones and Mark Cross. . .well. . .I guess the only thing I can say is I feel a bit sad for Mark and Kat having to face our team. Sure is a great feeling to have a fantastic Tag Team partner in Masque.

Bea:  I echo your comments Bill.

Bill:  I want everyone to know how thrilled I was when the drawing of names to create Tag Teams for the Blast From The Past Tournament gave me Masque as my partner. For those who may not have seen Masque in action I’ll give you an idea what she’s about. Everyone is familiar with the ZZ Top song LEGS. The lyrics of the song go She's got legs, she knows how to use them, She never begs, she knows how to choose them.  I’ve modified their lyrics to fit my fantastic tag team partner Masque. My version goes She’s got skills, she knows how to use them. She never begs, she knows how to choose them. Masque proved that against Kaiju Rainbow recently. I’m confident when the Bombshells get tagged into our match Masque will make quick work of Kat Jones and we’ll win the Blast From The Past Tournament match then  go on to win the overall Tournament.

Bea:  I can see Masque applying the Mandible Claw on Kat. Then the next thing is that Mark, who is freaking out over the loss in the match, will violate the rules to try to get Masque to release the Mandible Claw she has on Kat. Unfortunately that will either lead to a Disqualification of their team or Bill getting tagged in and whupping the crap out of Mark Cross.

Bill:  Some people get paired up with a partner who is totally insane and blows the match for them. Some get paired up with someone who is violent but lacks other skills in the ring and they blow the match for them. Others get paired with someone who cheats and gets their team disqualified. The list goes on for a long way. But me? I got teamed with Masque. She’s a great all-around wrestler. She has great wrestling skills. Some try to classify her as possibly insane. Some claim she might be too violent in the ring. There are some who make claims that she cheats. I’ve done research and I find that Masque may be a little bit of each of those but she has something that maybe one in ten wrestlers has. What is that you ask? The ability to focus on winning wrestling matches. The ability to take out opponents. The ability to intimidate others. The ability and desire to win. Masque is a unique wrestler in that she is everything you want her to be but if you’re her opponent she is everything you wish she was not. I was blessed in the draw for teams for the Blast From The Past Tournament with the draw of Masque as my partner.

Bea:  I totally agree with you Bill. Would you tell the viewers why you’re different from most wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling?

Bill:  I don’t copy other wrestlers. I have my own style and I do my own thing. I’m one who became successful because I don’t back down from anyone. I don’t back down from anything. Nothing intimidates me. I stand up and take the fight to my opponents. I won’t go into an overly long dissertation on what happened to create me as I am but I’ll present the two incidents that made me what I am today.

Bea:  Kat and Mark need to pay attention to these incidents so they’ll understand why they’ll lose to Bill and Masque.

WHAT DOESN’T KILL YOU MAKES YOU STRONGER

Bill:  I spent ten years fending off the murder intentions of my half-brother Chris Shipman. That’s not a figure of speech people. He wanted to literally murder me as he got found guilty in a Court of Law for the death of our sister and he tried to blame her death on me. I’m still here and doing great and Chris Shipman hasn’t been heard from since we both left the previous wrestling federation we worked in. That should tell you all you need to know about me and what I’m about.

Bea:  Tell them about your confrontations with Satan.

Bill:  When I worked in another wrestling federation, where my half-brother Chris Shipman also worked, Satan came to me annually to challenge me for my soul for eternity. Satan failed nine years in a row. Of course Satan came back the next year and I told him this has to be the last time he challenges me for my soul. He agreed and we had a binding contract. The bottom line was that  if Satan were to win this time and obtain my soul then I’m his to do with what he wants. If I win Satan is denied the opportunity to challenge me for my soul again for eternity. You all think Satan is extremely intelligent but he isn’t. I told him if I allow him to have his minions be on the voting crew to decide who wins our contest then he has to allow me to be the one to choose the challenge we have to perform in order to try to win. Proving he wasn’t thinking clearly that evening he agreed. Satan called one hundred of his minions to vote on our contest. I told Satan we had to have a dance-off. Satan roared with laughter because he felt this was an easy contest for him to win but I knew I was going to win. I even allowed Satan to go first. He did his dance routine and then I did mine. I did my dance routine to the music SHAKE YOUR BOOTY. When I was done me and Satan stood there waiting for his minions to vote on who would win. When the results were tallied on the vote by the minions they stated they gave seventy-five votes for Satan to win. Figuring he had won the contest to obtain my soul Satan started laughing uncontrollably. Unfortunately, for him anyway, when the minions then gave their vote on my performance and they gave me ninety of their one hundred votes. Yes I defeated Satan by fifteen votes and the votes came from Satan’s minions. I looked at Satan and reminded him of our agreement and since I won the tenth contest out of ten contests against him the agreement is he can never challenge me for my soul again for eternity. So, Mark and Kat, if you two piss ants think I’m intimidated by you then you’re more ignorant than I thought you were!

Bea:  That’s part of the reason Bill is confident in wrestling and life in general. Defeating one of the most deranged and mentally twisted persons in his half-brother Chris Shipman and defeating Satan for eternity is empowering. Bill are you going to tell the viewers the amusing thing you told me the other day about a child and a balloon?

Bill:  You’ve all seen a child with a balloon. They’re holding the string, smiling, happy, and admiring the balloon, then someone comes along with a pin and pops the balloon. The look on the child’s face is priceless! In an instant they went from having fun to being sad. . .having it all to having nothing. . .happy with the world to mad at the world but not able to do a damn thing about it. Yep! So, Mark and Kat, that’s how you two are going to feel when me and Masque defeat you. POP!!!

PAST HISTORY

Bill:  I wish to talk to you, Mark, for a moment. I’m an honest person so I’ll continue in my honesty concerning the history we have against each other. Our first match against each other was on August 4, 2019, at Climax Control 244. I lost to you by pinfall and I salute you on that win. Our second match against each other was on November 3, 2019, at Climax Control 251, and again you won over me by pinfall. So we enter our Blast From The Past match with you 2-0 against me. But, Mark, before you crow like a horny Rooster after the Hens those matches were over two years ago. Things have changed during that time for both of us. I see you were World Champion for about five weeks and that you won the Blast From The Past Tournament on April 12, 2020. But, alas, that was then and this is now. While you were a short-time Champion I have held the Roulette Championship since October 3, 2021. So shall we compare Championships for just a moment? You have around five weeks as World Champion and I’ll reach 133 days on the day we participate in Climax Control 322. Hell of a big difference comparing our Championship reigns eh?. If you want to bring up my Blast From The Past history from 2021 you’re welcome to do so. I would have easily won the Tournament had I not been teamed with a partner who spent all her time disrespecting me and throwing the match. This year the Tournament is different. I have a great partner who is talented, powerful, agile, and aggressive, and I know she has my back in the match and she knows I have hers.

Bea:  I had a match against Kat Jones at Climax Control 319 on December 12, 2021 by pinfall. Kat is a good wrestler but my observation is that Masque is a fantastic wrestler. I see Bill and Masque with an easy win in this match.

Bill:  I agree with you that our team will have the win in this match but I’m also aware that Kat Jones and Mark Cross are not going to do the trained dog routine of roll over and play dead. The key is to go into this match with confidence, a respect for my partner Masque, and the ability to tag in and out of the match to allow both of us to have the opportunity to pick up the win and move along in the Blast From The Past Tournament.

THE BOTTOM LINE

Bill:  In the world of finance the term BOTTOM LINE refers to the final totals after the accounting is done. If you have a profit on the bottom line they say you are IN THE BLACK but if you have a deficit on the bottom line it means you have taken a loss and you are IN THE RED.

Bea:  And the bottom lines for this match are?

Bill:  The bottom line for me and Masque is we have a huge profit and will win and move on in the Blast From The Past Tournament. We’ll continue winning until we’re the last team standing. But, Kat and Mark, you have a huge deficit which means you two are taking the loss and going home to watch our team continue on, and win, the Blast From The Past Tournament.

Bill informs the camera person he is done presenting his comments and the camera person calls into the Network to let them know. The Network cuts the feed to the camera person and returns to their regular programming for this time slot.


63
Climax Control Archives / NO MERCY
« on: February 02, 2022, 08:48:44 AM »
I’LL HAVE NO MERCY ON KAIJU RAINBOW

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart is scheduled for a match against Kaiju Rainbow for Climax Control 321. Bill is not performing at this Climax Control but he will be in his Blast From the Past Tournament match at Climax Control 322. Bill has Climax Control 321 off but he will be at the arena to watch Bea in her match.

AT RANDY’S PERENNIALS & WATER GARDENS IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

The scene opens and we see Bea Barnhart, and her English Bulldog Iris, at Randy's Perennials & Water Gardens located at 523 West Crogan Street in Lawrenceville, Georgia.

Bea:  Let’s look around Iris, I want to find Fig trees that have the Figs that are purple inside. I think the fruit trees are down this direction.

Bea and Iris start walking down the walkway to where the fruit trees are located. When Bea and Iris pass the section where the succulents are located Iris stops and won’t move even though Bea is pulling on her leash. Bea continues pulling but Iris won’t budge. When Bea looks at Iris she notices Iris is staring at numerous Cactus and we assume that keys here to think about her boyfriend Pete the Cactus.

Bea:  Sorry Iris but those Cactus are not Pete. You’ll be with him soon enough. Come on! We need to get to the section with fruit trees. I want to purchase several Fig trees that bear Figs with that are purple inside.

Iris reluctantly follows Bea but she keeps looking back at the Cactus and moans and cries.

BEA AND IRIS RETURN TO THEIR HOME IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

Bea and Iris return home and Bill comes downstairs to greet them as they enter the house. Iris runs upstairs and Bill is surprised how quickly the can move when she wants to.

Bill:  I guess Iris went to get on her laptop to have a video call with Pete the Cactus. Did you find the purple Fig trees?

Bea:  They didn’t have them in stock but they’ll come in shortly.

Bill:  Okay. I’ll go up and stay with Iris to keep an eye on her video call with Pete while you’re airing comments for your match against Kaiju Rainbow. How come there’s no camera person here to air your comments?

Bea:  I‘m airing my comments using my laptop computer. I’m connected to the Network and they’ll broadcast my comments real-time.

Bill:  Oh. . .Okay. . .I’ll have to start doing that also.

Bill goes upstairs and Bea gets on her laptop to air her comments for her upcoming match.

NO PITY. . .NO MERCY

Bea:  Before I go into my comments for my upcoming match against Kaiju Rainbow I wish to comment on Bill being in the Blast From The Past Tournament. I’m honored to have Bill in the Blast From The Past Tournament and I’ll be in his corner as his Manager for all his matches. I’m not going to lie to you but I hope Masque and Bill end up facing Mikah and Mac Bane in the Tournament. I want to see Mikah fail and Mac get beat down by Bill since Mac is the ringleader in the attacks that took place against Bill, Vinnie, and myself recently.

Bea holds her hand up in a fist and shakes it at the camera. She then grabs a bag of Skittles candy and aggressively rips the bag open. Bea downs the entire bag of Skittles in a short period of time then she glares into the webcam on her computer.

Bea:  You know that the tagline for Skittles candy is TASTE THE RAINBOW but you just saw me destroy the rainbow by ripping open the bag of Skittles and devouring all of them quickly. That’s how I plan on doing you in our match Kaiju. Just as I did with this bag of Skittles I’ll grab you, rip you open, and spill your rainbow all over the ring. TASTE THE RAINBOW they say? I say DESTROY THE RAINBOW!

Bea bursts out in laughter.

Bea:  I’ll be honest with you Kaiju. You managed to last longer in your match against Masque than I thought you would. When she locked in her Rapture Mandible Claw there was no escape for you. I’m sure you won’t mind if I also make you submit in our match right? I would expect you to talk a lot of crap leading up to our match but I’m not sure you’re able to talk very well after that Mandible Claw. Ha ha  ha!!!

DOES CATASTROPHE CREATE NEW THINGS

Bea:  Astronomers claim that planets were created when numerous celestial bodies crashed into each other. I call bullshit on that!. Things that crash into each other don’t create more complex and complete things. On the contrary two or more things crashing into each other usually destroys most of the objects that are crashing together. Have you ever seen an explosion in a junk yard and suddenly out of the results of the explosion a Boeing 747 Airliner, or a high rise building, or a car or truck, is created from the explosion? Hell no! Of course not! Well, Kaiju, I’m the explosion and you’re the trash in the dump. When I destroy you the pieces will not miraculously come together and create a new and better version of you. All it will do is splatter you around the ring. You’re going down for the count against me and there’s nothing you  can do about it.

PICK UP THE PIECES

Bea:  Kaiju are you familiar with the classic song titled PICK UP THE PIECES? It was done by the group Average White Band and it was very popular for the time when it came out. The lyrics are simple and go PICK UP THE PIECES repeated over and over again. Yeah, Kaiju, I’m going to break you into pieces and the crew at the Cox Pavilion in Las Vegas will come out and pick up your pieces.

FOLLOW THE COLORS

Bea:  Colors. Yeah! There are many colors out there. Some of the other wrestlers are green with envy over me. They always present the fact that I haven’t won as many matches as they have but then they’re green with envy because I’m prettier and more sexy than they could ever hope to be. Others are yellow because they have a yellow coward streak running down their spine. When the match action gets tough they often turn and run away. Others are blue because they always seem to be sad about something instead of enjoying every day to the fullest. Well, Kaiju, speaking of colors it is appropriate your name is Rainbow. Why? Because you’re green with envy that you can’t be like me. You’re jealous that you can never be as pretty and sexy as I am. You’re blue because you lost your match against Masque and you know you’re going to lose to me at Climax Control 321. But, Kaiju, after I put a big time beating on you know that you’ll also be black and blue from all the bruises I gave you. Enjoy the rainbow, Rainbow, because the storm named Bea is headed your way like a Category 5 hurricane and your rainbow is going to be obliterated.

OBSERVE, TAKE THE ADVANTAGE

Bea:  Well, Kaiju, how are you feeling so far hearing my comments concerning our match? Never mind telling me because I don’t care what you think or how you feel. I want you to know Bill has the video of your match against Masque and we’re going to go over the match. Bill has been in wrestling for 20 years and with his experience he’ll point things out to me so I can counter everything you have and to exploit your weaknesses. I’m honest concerning my work in the wrestling world that I didn’t come from a wrestling family as a lot of wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling have. I haven’t been a wrestler for 20 years as my husband Bill has done. I officially started my wrestling career on January 20, 2020, in Sin City Wrestling. With Bill’s experience and training I get better every match. And for damn sure I’m going to get the better of you in our match. Hurricane Bea is about to hit and  you’re directly in my path of destruction.

Bea smiles and waves and then she cuts the feed to the Network that is broadcasting her comments and our screen goes dark.


64
Climax Control Archives / TIME TO TAKE OUT THE TRASH
« on: December 09, 2021, 11:12:28 AM »
HERE KITTY KAT. . .TIME TO TAKE OUT THE TRASH

Narrator:  Bea is in the opening match of Climax Control 319 against Kat Jones who is new to Sin City Wrestling but not to the sport of wrestling. I will now turn you over to Bea at her home in Lawrenceville, Georgia.

The scene changes to the home of Bea Barnhart in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The camera person gets a shot of the fireplace in the home that has a warm fire burning. We don’t see Bea so of course we wonder where she is. We also don’t see Bea’s husband Bill or their English Bulldog Iris we assume they went to the park to stay out of Bea’s presentation leading up to her match against Kat Jones.

TAKE OUT THE TRASH

We don’t have to wait long before we see Bea walk into camera range holding a large trash, filled with trash, that is tied shut. Bea is told by the camera person that the camera is on and the Network is broadcasting. Bea is surprised they allowed that to happen but she cannot change what they did.

Bea:  Sorry the camera person only now told me they were live broadcasting. Please excuse me while I take out the trash. Watch me because when I face Kat Jones at Climax Control 319 I’m taking her, the trash, to the dumpster since we already have enough trashy wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling.

Bea walks to the patio door and slides it open. She walks to the trash can, opens the lid. and tosses the large bag of trash into it. Bea slams the lid shut and returns inside the house where she takes a chair near the fireplace.

Bea:  Let’s have a fireside chat shall we. I know Kat is watching so she should already know that where there is fire you’ll get burned. Kat just because you came from a pathetic wrestling federation where you managed to obtain a championship doesn’t mean shit here in Sin City Wrestling. You left a federation where a pathetic wrestler like you can win championships but you’re in the elite Federation of Sin City Wrestling now. I don’t care what the hell you did in another wrestling federation as you’re here in Sin City Wrestling now. You’re not going to walk into my territory and take me out. Nothing gets handed to anyone here. You either earn what you get or you get fired. Did you get that Kat? Fired…a fireside chat…that’s why I’m here sitting next to my fireplace. . .I’m gonna burn your ass in our match! Ha ha ha!!! I love analogies! Girl you don’t know how much fun I’m gonna have kicking your ass!

WHAT’S THE MARKET VALUE?

Bea:  Kat please allow me to give you information concerning the value of things. Me and Bill purchased our home on November 3, 2017 for $178,500. The house is a two-story house at 1,964 square feet with 3 bedrooms and 2.5 baths and our lot size is 6,000 square feet. As of November 23, 2021, the website Zillow has our house valued at $309,700 which is $131,200 more than we paid for the house in November 2017. We made a smart investment. If you, and the viewers, also want to make a smart investment then you all need to place your bets on me to win our match and all of you will make a hell of a lot of money winning the bet. However if you all want to bet on Kat Jones to win then please don’t cry to me when you lose your money on that stupid bet. Kat there’s another reason I told you about the increase in the value of our home as it does, in fact, relate to those of us in the sport of wrestling. We took care of our house and that made sure the value increased. Had we let the house run down we wouldn’t be looking at over $309,000 in value. Same with wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling. I started wrestling here and soon my value went way up. Others in the fed have pathetic wrestling abilities and their value has gone down and continues to go down. All you see them do these days is go public and demand shots at Championships when they’re not earning those shots. Never once have I demanded a shot at a Championship. It has been Management that decided which matches I got assigned to and which Championships I got a chance to challenge for. What’s the point of this you ask? When I defeat you this Sunday my value will continue to increase. When you lose to me your value will go way down. You don’t have to believe me at this time but I promise you’ll become a believer when you lose to me at Climax Control 319.

SOMEDAY NEVER COMES

Bea:  Kat you’re too young to remember the song SOMEDAY NEVER COMES by Creedence Clearwater Revival. One of the lyrics in the song goes ‘CAUSE SOMEDAY NEVER COMES. Kat I hate to have to be the wrestler to prove to you that just because you think that someday you’ll defeat me in a wrestling match that reality will never happen for you. Keep the song lyrics in your mind so you’ll always hear ‘CAUSE SOMEDAY NEVER COMES because you’ll never be able to defeat me. To give you an example there’s one wrestler in Sin City Wrestling who I’ve defeated FOUR times in FOUR matches. Yes, Kat, you heard me correctly. And even with that this same wrestler, who has never defeated me, claims I’ll never be able to defeat her. I’ll not mention her name but if you ask around you can find out who it is. It is going to be the same with you Kat. No way in hell you’re going to defeat me this match, or any other match, because that someday for you is never going to come.

Bea informs the camera person that she will take a short break before returning to her comments. She informs the camera person to have the Network run a video of her on Twitter until she returns from her break. Bea stands up and walks out of the room and the video of her on Twitter runs.

MORONS ON TWITTER

While Bea is taking a short break from her comments the Network runs the video of Bea reading comments on Twitter.

Bea:  I get sick of morons getting on Twitter asking why I didn’t comment on this or that. They demand to know why, since they posted negative comments about me, I didn’t respond. They call me a coward for not being a Twitter whore like they are and the answer is obvious that I don’t lower myself to their level. They always try to get others to whore themselves out on Twitter and they get pissed off when those of us who are intelligent and self-confident don’t follow their bullshit. Listen up carefully. When I have something I want to comment on I might say it on Twitter, or in a promo, or in comments before my match starts. But if I don’t want to comment on anything at the time then I most likely won’t comment.  Also when you go off on me because I didn’t whore myself out on Twitter like you did remember that I do my best talking with my actions in the ring in my matches. And to think morons like those on Twitter actually think they’re something people care about.

MORONS OUTSIDE OF TWITTER

Bea rolls her eyes.

Bea:  It isn’t just the morons on Twitter who I refer to as Twitter whores who make me roll my eyes in disgust. There are people like them everywhere. Week after week after week I hear the same bullshit from the other wrestlers. They want to know why I don’t show videos of myself in sparring matches like they do. They want to know why I don’t live stream my training sessions like they do. They want to know why I don’t do everything the way they do it. BECAUSE I’M MY OWN PERSON AND I DAMN SURE DO WHAT I WANT, WHEN I WANT, AND HOW I WANT! So there you have it. Just because I don’t do everything the way the rest of you do doesn’t mean I’m not doing it. I feel it is not your business to know every damn thing I do. My job getting in front of the camera to comment on upcoming matches is to comment on upcoming matches and on my opponents. All the other stuff, the non-wrestling related stuff is, for me anyway, not what I’m before the camera to do. If you don’t like that about me then turn and walk away but please keep your sarcastic bitchy foolish comments to yourself.

JUST ANOTHER ANNOYING FLY ON THE WALL

Bea returns to the living room as the Network has finished running the video from Bea reading comments on Twitter. Bea returns to her seat next to the fireplace. Just as Bea is about to continue her comments a Fly goes by and lands on the wall next to the fireplace. Bea stands up and walks over to where her flyswatter is hanging and she grabs it and returns to the wall where the fly is waiting.

Bea:  So, Kat, you want to be a fly on the wall to try to spy on me day and night in hopes you might find a flaw in me that you can capitalize on in our match? WHAP!!!

Bea whacks the fly with the flyswatter and the fly dies and lands hard on the floor.

Bea:  Yeah that’s what I thought Kat. You’re nothing more than an annoying thing flying around and when you land I knock you out of the picture and most likely knock you out literally. I don’t tolerate annoying pests and you’re just a pathetic little annoying bug. Time for me to swat you out of Sin City Wrestling.


65
Climax Control Archives / BULLSHIT. . .FLAT OUT BULLSHIT!!!
« on: November 24, 2021, 12:12:05 PM »
BULLSHIT. . .FLAT OUT BULLSHIT!!!

Narrator:  This match for the World Bombshell Championship for Bea Barnhart came as a surprise. After the cowardly beat down of her husband, Bill Barnhart, and their friend Senor Vinnie, Bea demanded action be taken because of the cowardly attack by Mac Bane, Ken Davison, Supreme Machine, and Dominick Strife, for their actions. When Management came up with forcing Amber Ryan, who is Mac Bane’s wife, to defend the World Bombshell Championship against Bea. . .well. . .shit happens and it damn sure did in this case.

AT STANFORD, CALIFORNIA, READY FOR CLIMAX CONTROL 317

SOMEONE FAILED TO DO THEIR JOB PROPERLY

The scene changes and we are taken to the hotel room of Bea Barnhart which is near Stanford University in California. We see Bea is pacing back and forth, stomping her feet, and yelling stuff. She’s obviously still pissed off over the attack on Bill and Vinnie at Climax Control 316. Since this is not what we normally see in a Bea Barnhart promo segment we wonder if perhaps the camera person inadvertently left their camera running after they ran a test to ensure the camera is working properly.

Bea:  Arghhhh! There’s gonna be hell to pay for the bullshit attacks Mac and his goons continue to do upon Bill and Vinnie.!It takes a special type of coward to have to attack others two-on-one, three-on-two, and four-on-two, like those weak assholes have been doing!

Bea kicks one of the chairs then she spins around and heads back in the other direction.

Bea:  At least my complaint to Management was understood and they took action against Mac as he is the ringleader of the group of thugs! I feel bad Amber Ryan has to take the punishment since I’m not allowed to be assigned to take on Mac one-on-one!

While Bea is ranting on the cheap attacks by Mac and company she glances over to see the camera person show up and stand next to their camera and they start to go over the camera to ensure it is still working properly. Bea asks the camera person if the camera has been on all this time and the person realizes they forgot to turn the camera feed off before taking a break. They apologize to Bea for the mistake but Bea goes nuclear on them.

Bea:  I should contact your Supervisor and have you fired! You don’t set up your camera and leave it running! People involved might do or say something that gets broadcast to the public and then your company ends up with a lawsuit! I can’t undo what you did to me but you damn sure better toe the line from here out or your job at the Network is over is that clear?

The camera person assures Bea there will not be any further glitches in the broadcast. Bea takes a few minutes to calm down and then she informs the camera person she is ready to go live to broadcast her comments on her upcoming match. The camera person informs Bea when they are live broadcasting and she launches into her comments.

WHAT CAUSED THIS MATCH WITH AMBER RYAN TO HAPPEN

Bea:  It is obvious that Bill and Iris are not with me on this trip. Bill went home after Climax Control 316 and he has been under the care of our family physician, Doctor Kim, for the injuries he sustained at the hands of Mac Bane and his three thugs. Our neighbor, Peter, offered to take care of Iris at his home since he lives three houses down and has a dog to keep Iris company.

Bea is about to continue with her comments when her cell phone rings. When she looks at the Caller ID she sees the call is from her husband Bill.

Bea:  I apologize for the interruption but this call is from Bill. To show you how transparent I am, as compared to the rest of you in Sin City Wrestling, I’ll place my call on speaker so everyone knows what we’re discussing so nobody has to take hallucinating drugs and then in their drug-induced state of mind try to make up what me and Bill talked about. Thanks for the call, Bill, but you need to know I’m just starting to air my comments for my upcoming match so if we can keep this call short I can get back to my comments on the match.

Bill:  That’s easy to do. I’m calling to let you know what Doctor Kim said about my condition after being attacked by cowards at Climax Control 316.

Bea:  What did Doctor Kim say?

Bill:  He said X-Rays came out fine. He said other than having some bruises, both external and internal, and several scratches and cuts, I’m good to go whenever I’m ready.

Bea:  Great news! I was concerned that you might have sustained more severe injuries but you’re tougher than your attackers thought you were.

Bill:  Let me provide a quick reminder for the viewers of how tough I am. I told the story numerous times of the feud between me and my half-brother Chris Shipman. He vowed to kill me. Yes he vowed to end my life for HIS poor choices in his life which included him being found guilty of the death of our sister. Back in the previous Wrestling Federation we worked in for ten years we were always assigned to the most vile, vicious, and career ending, matches ever known to the sport of wrestling and most of those matches were so evil, demonic, and dangerous, they are permanently banned from the sport of wrestling. Today I’m still in the sport of wrestling. I’m still holding a Championship. I still never back down. And I’m still alive. But where is Chris Shipman? After failing to take me out I guess Chris Shipman either quit trying and went into hiding or maybe he’s already deceased. I don’t know and I don’t care. The cowardly attack by Mac and his thugs will come back to haunt them. I’ve taken enough of your air time Bea so I’ll end the call and you continue with your comments. And you can thank Mac and his goons for you getting this shot at the World Bombshell Championship.

Bea:  Thanks Bill.

Bea ends the call then returns to her match comments.

BULLSHIT. . .FLAT OUT BULLSHIT

Bea:  That attack on Bill and Vinnie at Climax Control 316 was BULLSHIT! Just flat out BULLSHIT!!! Since the cowardly, chickenshit, bullshit, four-on-two beat down of my husband, Bill Barnhart and Senor Vinnie, by Mac Bane, Ken Davison, Dominick Strife, and Supreme Machine, after their match was over, and after Bill won the match by taking out Dominick, I’m more than pissed off. I protested to Management and demanded action be taken against those four cowards and I left the decision in their hands. The next thing I know I’m on the Climax Control 317 card, in the Main Event, facing Amber Ryan for the World Bombshell Championship. They say you should never question when opportunities like this drop in your lap. This is how Karma works and I’m glad Management saw that something needed to be done about the assault.

Bea pauses her comments for a moment.

Bea:  I guess Management figured since Mac Bane is the ringmaster calling the shots that he should be punished the most for the brutal after-match beat down he and his thugs perpetrated on Bill and Vinnie. The way I remember how things were supposed to go was that the World Bombshell Championship was going to be defended at the last Climax Control of 2021. Well that quickly changed eh Amber? The actions by your cowardly husband has now cost you as you have to defend the World Bombshell Championship against me sooner than you wanted to defend it. We’ve had only one match together and that was a Bombshell World Championship Qualifier match and you won over me by submission. I commend you on that win but your one win doesn’t equate into another one. This time you face a pissed off woman who had her husband brutally attacked after his match was over and if you think I’m not going to take my anger out on you, for what your cowardly husband and his thugs did, then you’re damn sure more stupid than I thought you were!

Bea pauses her comments again but this time it is to take a drink of water before continuing with her comments.

EXPECTATIONS FOR MY MATCH

Bea:  I don’t expect to win this match against you Amber. Now now now before you get the giggles and piss in your panties and think I’m conceding the match you need to wipe that huge grin off your face and listen up. Since your husband, Mac, proved himself to be a coward that tells me you’re also a coward as you didn’t seem to do anything to prevent him from attacking Bill and Vinnie. Back to my comment that I don’t expect to win this match against you please allow me to clarify that comment. I don’t expect to get the win over you when I’m sure you’ve already arranged for Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine to interfere in our match and threaten to beat me down. Yes I honestly expect that from you as you weren’t expecting to meet me in a Championship defense match this soon. I assure you if you and your four cowardly thugs interfere in our match and cause me to lose I’ll not stop working to destroy you and them for what they did. Yes I know their interference will cause you to lose the match, and I’ll get the official win on my record, but under normal circumstances when a Champion loses a Championship Defense match because they got disqualified that they lose the match but not their Championship. The only way I can see Management fixing the anticipated interference by your four thugs is to add to our match that even if you lose by Disqualification to me you’ll also lose the World Bombshell Championship to me. That’s their call to make so we’ll see what they decide to do. Perhaps that’s the only way to get this bullshit of interference and after-match beat downs to stop.

Bea pauses her comments to reach over on the couch and pick up a small black bag. Bea opens the zipper of the bag and pulls out two clay characters we’re familiar with. One is the clay character Mister Bill and the other is his ever-present tormenter Mister Sluggo. Bea holds them on her lap.

OH NOOOOO!!!!! BEA’S GONNA BE MEAN TO ME!!!

Bea:  Unless you live under a rock with no television you know who Mister Bill and Mister Sluggo are. Mister Sluggo constantly beats up and tortures Mister Bill in every episode of their adventures and he has the help of Mister Hands in these disgusting attacks. Notice that Mister Sluggo is just like Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine in that they need help to take out one person. Before Bill returned to Lawrenceville, Georgia, he told me when he returns to action in the wrestling ring he’s going into destroy mode and Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine are on his shit list. Amber in our match you’re the clay character Mister Bill and I’m Mister Sluggo and I’m going to be mean to you as Mister Sluggo always is to Mister Bill. Again, as I previously mentioned, if your four pathetic goons don’t get involved in our match the World Bombshell Championship is mine. If they get involved and cost me the match I can only hope Management allows me to earn the Championship from you as you had to have help, against the rules, to Disqualify yourself to try to retain the Championship even though I defeated you.

Bea returns the two clay characters into the small bag and places it on the coffee table in front of the couch she is sitting on.

WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU HAVE ME DONE AWAY WITH

Bea:  Amber have you heard of the man named Rasputin? I’ll venture a guess you’re not intelligent enough to know facts about history. Even if you did I believe you’re so mentally dense you wouldn’t remember it anyway. I believe you’re so mentally deficient that you cannot even recall what you ate for your last meal. Let me tell you about Rasputin. So many wanted him “put out of the way” which is a mild term for killed. So many people also want my husband, Bill Barnhart, out of the way but they’ve always failed. Remember if Bill’s half-brother Chris Shipman wasn’t able to take Bill all the way out after ten years of trying then for damn sure your four goons aren’t gonna be able to accomplish it. Going back to Rasputin those who wanted to kill him poisoned him on numerous occasions and he wouldn’t die. Be careful who you run up to and try to take them out as it often blows up in your face.

Bea pauses once again to take a drink of water.

WRESTLING IS LIKE A GAME OF CHESS

Bea:  Amber I would ask you if you ever played the game of Chess, or if you even know what the game is about, but I would hate to pose that question only to have the two or three working brain cells you have left blow out and then you become more moronic than you already are. Chess is a board game. There are various pieces players use in the game and each playing piece can only move in specific directions. It is a thinking game, which immediately puts you at a disadvantage, because you didn’t think to take action against your four thugs and prevent them from perpetrating the attack on Bill and Vinnie. But, as useless as an explanation of Chess is to explain to idiots, I’ll still explain the concept of the game to you as there are viewers who can comprehend what I’m saying even if you can’t. In the game of Chess you should always look ahead several moves. Even if your opponent manages to do something that makes you change the several moves ahead you already planned you have the ability to quickly adapt and take your opponent out while at the same time keeping a list of several moves ahead to keep your opponent hesitating. I enter every match like a Chess game. I have everything figured out. If my opponent does something strange or unexpected I’m able to quickly maneuver and get back on track to where I’m in control of the match. And just so you know, as I hate opponents who whine that they were not warned ahead of time, I have the ability to quickly adapt should you go off on some wild tangent and I have people watching our match to ensure any attempted interference from your four thugs will be dealt with appropriately and quickly. Here’s the bottom line Amber:  CHECKMATE!!! I win!!!

Bea pauses her comments to get up and walk into the kitchen area where she returns with a plate of cookies to go along with her drinks of water. Bea devours several cookies then washes them down with a drink of water before placing the dish with the cookies on it on the coffee table in front of the couch.

GUILTY BY ASSOCIATION

Bea:  Amber I can’t hold you responsible for what Mac and his goons did to Bill after their match at Climax Control 316. Well I can’t hold you accountable at this time anyway. I’m still doing research to find out if you had anything to do with that vile disgusting and illegal beat down on Bill and Vinnie at Climax Control 316. If, between now and our match, I find out you had something to do with that attack you’ll pay heavily for your involvement. If I’m unable to find out if you had something to do with the attack then you’re either innocent of being involved in the attack or you’re damn good at hiding the truth. For your well-being I damn sure hope I don’t find out you were involved.

Bea informs the camera person she’s ready to make closing comments. The camera person passes that information onto the Network and the Network tells them when Bea is done with her final comments they are to cut their camera feed and the Network will take over the air time from there.

Bea:  Amber you and everyone in Sin City Wrestling know that me and Bill are fair and honest people. We realize other wrestlers who are pathetic often act violent to cover up their shortcomings in the wrestling ring. We realize other wrestlers are intimidated by us. Most wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling hurl insults and demeaning comments at us. Yet with all that crap going around we’ve maintained our composure so as not to be labeled as over-violent and mean. So you can hurl insults and demeaning comments at me if you want as I’m not intimidated by your bullshit threats. All you and the other wrestlers earn by hurling crap at me is an ass kicking. And after what your four did to Bill and Vinnie I’m not holding back in our match. And to make sure you and Mac and your goons behave I’ll ask for Senor Vinnie to be my corner person and we’ve talked with numerous wrestlers to be standing by in case your four goons try any crap. Good luck Amber. You’re damn sure gonna need it!

Bea is done with her comments and the camera person cuts their camera feed and the Network returns to regularly scheduled programming.


66
Climax Control Archives / KARMA'S A BITCH AND I'M KARMA'S HIT MAN
« on: November 16, 2021, 06:37:12 PM »
KARMA’S A BITCH AND I’M KARMA’S HIT MAN

Narrator:  Before coming on screen to give you the introduction to Bill Barnhart’s comments on his upcoming match  I had a meeting with Bill and he told me the general concept of what he plans on talking about. Simply put Bill said that Karma is a bitch and that he’s Karma’s hit man. With that out of the way I turn you over to Bill Barnhart.

The scene switches and we see Bill Barnhart in his room at a hotel near the Provident Credit Union Event Center in San Jose, California. With him in the room is his wife and Manager, Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris. Bill looks into the camera and launches into his comments.

Bill:  There’s a statement that goes KARMA’S ONLY A BITCH IF YOU ARE. Applying that to our oppoents, who are backed by Mac Bane and Ken Davison, they’re all a bitch and will be taken out by Karma. I want you to know I’m Karma’s hit man. Damn it’s fun being Karma’s hit man! Since Mac Bane and Ken Davison are both a bitch and they are standing behind the tag team of Dominick Strife and Supreme Machine, we already know they will get involved in the match to attempt to screw us out of the win. I’m here to let them know  if they get involved in the match in any manner, except to offer support and give suggestions and advice to Dominic and Supreme Machine, then all the rules are off the table and anything goes. I assure Mac and Ken that getting involved in this match, and getting destroyed by us in the process, is not what they want. Now that I have those comments out of the way I wish to address other items before getting into direct comments concerning our match.

BACK TO AN INCIDENT DURING BILL’S HIGH SCHOOL DAYS

We are taken back to when Bill Barnhart was attending Skyline High School in Oakland, California. We see Bill and his friend Steve parked on the side of a street, with Bill’s car, when another car drives up and stops. Two classmates from Skyline High School, Jerry and John, who hate Bill and Steve, get out of the other car and confront Bill and Steve.

Bill:  Oh, great, the scum of the Earth just showed up to give us some shit.

Steve:  We got this Bill.

Jerry:  Oh, look, two f*cking losers, Bill and Steve, ready to get their asses kicked.

John:  Are you two ready to get beat down?

Bill and Steve look at each other, then they look at Jerry and John. Bill and Steve flip their middle finger at Jerry and John and tell them to f*ck off.

Jerry:  Wrong move to try to intimidate us.

John:  You’re gonna get hurt now!

Jerry and John charge Bill and Steve and try landing blows but they miss terribly. Bill and Steve land several blows then they shove Jerry and John to the ground then they get into Bill’s car, start the engine, and threaten to run over Jerry and John. Jerry and John wisely get into their car and try to take off to avoid getting whacked by Bill’s car. Since Jerry and John are scared shitless they swerve into traffic and get hit by an oncoming car. Fortunately for Jerry and John the other car didn’t cause enough damage to injure them but their driver’s side door is crushed and there’s enough other damage to prevent them from moving the car. Bill and Steve pull up alongside Jerry’s car, roll down their windows, and yell at Jerry and John.

Steve:  That will teach you not to mess with us! Ha ha ha!

Bill:  That shows you assholes how Karma works. Karma rose up and slam dunked you for trying to do something illegal. I’m glad I’m associated with Karma as it sure is fun being Karma’s hit man!

At that comment Bill hits the gas and speeds off down the road. He looks in his rearview mirror to see the police showing up to investigate the accident. Knowing Jerry is going to get arrested Bill and Steve do a HIGH FIVE and continue driving off into the distance.

RETURN TO CURRENT TIME

Bill:  Ahhh I remember an incident when our former friends Jerry and John attacked me and my friend Steve and we got the advantage on them and then Karma rose up and kicked their ass. It’s always fun to watch Karma work to f*ck people up who are assholes. Speaking of assholes we have a match at Climax Control 316 where we face a pathetic tag team consisting of Dominick Strife and Supreme Machine. They have the backing of Mac Bane and Ken Davison. I find it amusing that two losers are being backed by two losers. Double losers are amusing. Mac. . .Ken. . .the only reason you are involved in this match is to interfere in the match to try to screw me and Vinnie out of the win. That’s not gonna happen. Not in this match. . .not in our nexte match. . .not ever. You seem to be able to talk the talk but you’re not able to walk the walk. I’m telling you now, before the match happens, so that you cannot claim you didn’t know, if you get involved in the match and try to interfere in the match in any manner, all rules will be thrown out and it is all out war. Me and Vinnie are not going to get screwed over by pathetic jerks who can’t face us directly so they have to try to gang up on us. Nice try but that shit won’t work against me and Vinnie.

Bill grins toward the camera.

Bill:  D’oh!!! Dominick, Supreme Machine, Mac, and Ken, you know that exclamation from The Simpsons. That’s the common thing Homer Simpson utters when he realizes he f*cked up. You four will be uttering that exclamation, and many more, if you try to cheat or interfere in the match and me and Vinnie give you the beat down of a lifetime. You’ll utter that exclamation when you realize you should have just shut the f*ck up and turned around and walked away. I don’t take shit from anyone and neither does Vinnie.

CALLING FOR HELP FROM JESUS OR AN EXCLAMATION KNOWING YOU’RE TOAST?

Bill:  One of my close friends during High School was Steve Truelson. We used to do sleepovers at each other’s house all the time. We were always getting into trouble with our parents but we didn’t care. During one sleepover at Steve’s house we stayed up late and we decided to shoot off fireworks. We set off fireworks outside Steve’s bedroom door which led to the walkway on the side of the house then jumped into bed to pretend we were asleep to make it look like it wasn’t us who did the fireworks. I remember my friend’s father, Clyde, woke up from his sleep due to the noise and he yelled what I thought was CHEEZ-IT like the crackers. I asked Steve if he thinks his father is hungry and he asked me why I asked that question. I said because Clyde is yelling for CHEEZ-IT so I thought he wanted crackers. Steve laughed and told me his father wasn’t yelling for CHEEZ-IT to get crackers he was using the name of Jesus as a curse word by screaming out JESUS!!! as more of a curse.

Bill lets out a loud laugh.

Bill:  Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine, I told you that story about Steve’s father, Clyde, for a reason. First for Dominick and Supreme Machine if you play by the rules of our match and don’t cheat, don’t violate the rules, and don’t have Mac and Ken interfere in the match you’ll lose the match but we promise not to seriously hurt you. However if you cheat, violate the rules, or have Mac or Ken interfere in the match, you’ll get severely hurt and may end up retiring from wrestling. Is that a threat? Nope! That’s a promise! As for Mac and Ken I state publicly that if you have to resort to cheap shots, cheating, and attacks on other wrestlers, to try to get noticed then you’re damn sure more pathetic than I thought. Me and Vinnie don’t cheat. Me and Vinnie don’t rely on interference in our matches. However me and Vinnie take revenge on those who pull that crap on us. You have a choice to make. Play by the rules or get taken out and possibly sent into retirement. That’s not a choice me and Vinnie have to make. That a choice you four have to make. Remember, though, that you have to live with the choice you make. If you start the attack on us then me and Vinnie will finish it and you’ll get hurt. You can call on God, Satan or Jesus. . .or even CHEESE-IT crackers, but I tell you there are not enough supernatural powers, or CHEESE-IT crackers, in the Universe that you can call on to help you beat us down. If you think I’m joking then try. . .just try. . .I dare you.

CLOSING COMENTS

Bill:  For our opponents, Supreme Machine and Dominick I let you know that myself and Vinnie will not tolerate any cheating or interference. If you need the help of Mac and Ken to defeat us then you are two pathetic pieces of shit and need to be flushed down the toilet. As for Mac and Ken you need to know that your actions have an effect on how you’re seen by the other wrestlers and the fans. If you want to cheat and interfere in the match to help your two puppets, Supreme Machine and Dominick, get a cheap win, that’s fine as I’ve already told you we’ll deal with that in more than one way. One thing I hate with a passion are cheaters, liars, and people with illegal behavior. Me and Vinnie have had enough of the bullshit from the rest of the Roster. Your puppets wrestlers, and you two, either play the game by the rules or your wrestling careers are over. Your choice to make. We’ve made our choice. See you on November 21, 2021, at Climax Control 316.

Bill informs the camera person that he’s done with his comments. They call into the Network to tell them that and the Network tells them to cut their camera feed and when the camera person cuts their camera feed the screen goes dark.


67
Climax Control Archives / FOUR TIMES THE FUN WHEN YOU HAVE FOUR OPPONENTS
« on: October 21, 2021, 07:41:00 AM »
FOUR TIMES THE FUN WHEN YOU HAVE FOUR OPPONENTS

Narrator:  Bea has her shot at the Roulette Championship, at Climax Control 315, against four opponents including Krystal Wolfe the Roulette Champion, Johanna Krieger, Bella Madison, and Seleana Zdunich. Bea has every reason to believe she will walk away as the Bombshell Roulette Championship but I won’t step on her toes by telling you what she told me. I will turn you over to Bea Barnhart to let her explain it to you.

BEA. . .AGE 10. . .ELEMENTARY SCHOOL IN THE PHILIPPINES

We are taken back in time to when Bea was in Elementary School in the Philippines. She is in her classroom trying to focus on the lesson but some of the annoying punk kids are talking smack about her and teasing her. They tell Bea when School is over, and she is walking through the school hallways, they will get her and make her feel their wrath. Bea makes it through the hallways without incident and she exits the school to catch a Jeepney to return to her home. Before she can get on the Jeepney four of the harassing students confront Bea. They push and shove her and she refrains from fighting back. When the four kids get more aggressive Bea lashes out quickly, and decisively, knocking the four punks to the ground. While the students are getting up Bea jumps on the Jeepney and the driver speeds off to take Bea home. Although the four punk kids are yelling at her as the Jeepney drives away they can’t do a damn thing since they were disabled by Bea.

BEA. . .AGE 16…HIGH SCHOOL IN THE PHILIPPINES

We advance in time and see Bea graduating from High School in the Philippines. Before Bea is called up to accept her Diploma she is confronted by four students who tease her. Bea confronts them and reminds them she is an Honor Student and she graduated with all A grades while the punk students were lucky they are still able to graduate with an average of a C grade. The nearly failing students are jealous of Bea so they surround her and try to take  her down. Bea adequately fights off their attempted attacks and this grabs the attention of one of the teachers at the High School who steps in and separates the four punks from Bea. The teacher then calls the Principal of the school over who admonishes the four punks and then informs them they are not going to graduate today and that they have to repeat their Senior year of High School so they will learn their lesson and their place in life.

A MATCH IS FOUR TIMES THE FUN WHEN YOU HAVE FOUR OPPONENTS

We return to present time and we see Bea Barnhart walking around in the Agganis Arena at Boston University where Sin City Wrestling is holding Climax Control 315. The camera person keeps their camera focused on her and Bea stops and turns toward the camera to present comments for her upcoming match.

Bea:  On October 24, 2021, at Climax Control 315, I’m involved in a five person match for the Bombshell Roulette Championship. Although the official Card for Climax Control 315 states that Krystal Wolfe, the current Bombshell Roulette Champion,  is scheduled to defend the Roulette Championship against Char Kwan at High Stakes XI, there’s little chance of that happening as I’m winning the Roulette Championship this Sunday. Does that mean that after I defeat my four opponents this Sunday that I, as Roulette Champion, will defend the Championship against Char Kwan at High Stakes XI? Guess we’ll find out soon enough!

Bea continues walking with the camera person staying focused on her until she turns a corner where she stops to present additional comments.

Bea:  I’m facing the Bombshell Roulette Champion, Krystal Wolfe, and Johanna Krieger, and Bella Madison, and Seleana Zdunich, in a Graveyard Match, with the winner becoming Sin City Wrestling’s Bombshell Roulette Champion. Now I already know what you ‘re thinking and what my opponents are thinking. You and my opponents will say since I am 0-1 against Krystal Wolfe, 0-1 against Bella Madison, and 0-4 against Seleana Zdunich, that I have absolutely no chance of winning this match. What’s that? You want to know why I didn’t mention the name of Johanna Krieger? That’s because I haven’t had a match with her yet. If you think I cannot win this match it proves you’re not thinking.

Bea walks around and this time she stops in front of the wrestling ring that is set up for Climax Control 315.

Bea:  The concept of this Graveyard Match is simple. The five of us will be wrestling in a Graveyard. In order to eliminate your opponents you have to toss them into one of the many open graves available. Once all my opponents are eliminated I’m crowned Sin City Wrestling Bombshell Roulette Champion. Now you’re asking the question how in the world do I expect to be able to toss my opponents into graves to eliminate them from the match when the four of them will be trying to toss me into a grave to eliminate me? Again that proves you’re not capable of logical thought. It isn’t the concept that I have to personally toss the four of them into the graves to win the match. The way I see it is if anyone in the match is tossed into a grave, regardless of who it is that tosses them into the grave, they’re eliminated from the match. Maybe I’ll personally toss each of them into a grave to eliminate them to prove my ability to do so or perhaps I may allow the others in the match to beat the hell out of each other then throw the others into the graves to eliminate them. Then when it comes down  whichever of them is remaining active in the match I’ll eliminate them by throwing them into a grave. There are so many interesting ways to see this match and I see the match as working in my favor. In fact please allow me to show you a graphic to let you know how dominating I’ll be in this match.

The Network puts up the graphic from Bea to give everyone a graphic image of how dominating she will be in this match.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

After a short time the Network removes the graphic and we return to a shot of Bea Barnhart as she continues with her comments.

HOW I SEE MY OPPONENTS

Bea holds up one finger into the camera.

Bea:  Krystal I address  you first. You’re the current Bombshell Roulette Champion. I described you as the “current” Bombshell Champion because after our match you’ll no longer be Roulette Champion because I’ll be crowned the Bombshell Champion. You talk a lot of smack but deep inside you’re scared of losing the Roulette Championship. Although you’re pre-scheduled to defend the Roulette Championship at High Stakes XI against Char Kwan you know damn well you can’t do that when I defeat you this Sunday and become Sin City Wrestling’s Bombshell Roulette Champion. As a Champion you have to always be ready to lose the Championship as nothing is guaranteed to you.

Bea holds up two fingers into the camera.

Bea:  Johanna you’re the second person I address. I want you to know that you are in this match for only one reason and that is to be my victim when I eliminate you from the match. Talk all the smack you want but your talk is cheap. You enter our match as a challenger to the Roulette Championship but you leave the match as a defeated wrestler.

Bea holds up three fingers into the camera.

Bea:  Third to be addressed is you Bella. You might try to use the fact that you got a win over me in a Mixed Tag Team match but that’s old history and it doesn’t mean anything for our upcoming match. That Mixed Tag Team match was then and this is now. If you think that your one win in that type of match will save you from having me eliminate you in our match you’re sadly mistaken.

Bea holds up four fingers into the camera.

Bea:  Seleana there’s a reason I saved you to be the forth wrestler I address. The reason is we’ve had four matches against each other and you won all four of them. I freely admit you’re 4-0 against me. I assume you also believe that due to that accomplishment you feel you’re not going to be able to be eliminated by me. That might be the case if one of the other wrestlers eliminates you but I assure you I want to be the one to eliminate you. Yes you did hold the Bombshell Roulette Championship once and it was a short run but that doesn’t mean I’ll have compassion on you in our match. You’ll be eliminated by me and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.

Bea flashes a huge grin.

Bea:  You four girls. . .yes I just called you girls because I feel the term women is too good for you. . .remind me of two incidents I had when I grew up in the Philippines. One was when I was in Elementary School. Since I was a student who got mostly A’s as grades many of the other students were jealous of me. They would hurl insults and threats to me and they got even more upset when I ignored their threats. On one day I was leaving the school to get on the Jeepney to return home and they confronted me and attempted to inflict physical harm on me. Having great reflexes and ability to fend off their attacks I dropped the four of them to the ground. While they were trying to recover I got on the Jeepney and was taken home. The next day those four students were reprimanded for their behavior and they were suspended from school for a week. Their attitudes changed when they were allowed back in school.

Bea flashes a  huge grin again.

Bea:  In my Senior year in High School something similar happened. We were getting ready for the High School Graduation ceremony and I was confronted by four students who were jealous of me since I was graduating with Honors while they were barely able to get a passing grade.  They surrounded me with the intent to physically attack me when a Teacher stepped in and stood between us. The teacher was upset at the students so she called the Principal over and the Principal, after learning what these students tried to do to me, told them they will not graduate that year and they have to retake their Senior year of High School. I graduated with Honors while those four punks had to retake their Senior Year.

Bea looks intently into the camera.

Bea:  Why did I tell you the incidents, and results of those incidents, from my Elementary School and Senior High days? I wanted you to know that you four are just like the punks that tried to attack me on the way to my Jeepney and they failed. You four are just like the students in High School who wanted to destroy my Graduation Ceremony, with me graduating with Honors, because they were barely able to get an average overall grade of a C in High School. Like the four punks from Elementary School who I dropped to the ground I’ll drop the four of you into graves to become Sin City Wrestling’s Bombshell Roulette Champion. Just like the students during the incident just before our High School Graduation Ceremony when you four lose to me you’ll be sent back down to the bottom of the ladder of success to try to earn your way back up into contention. If you think I’m joking with what I’m saying then please feel free to laugh. You four damn sure won’t be laughing when I win our match!

WHAT’S THE BOTTOM LINE?

Bea:  I’m sure most viewers want to know what my bottom line is concerning this Bombshell Roulette Championship match. ONE is that I want to become Roulette Champion so that me and my husband Bill will both be serving as Roulette Champions at the same time. TWO is that I want to prove my dominance and what better way than to have four opponents in the match instead of the normal one opponent. THREE is that although I could just hide in the bushes or behind a headstone and wait for my four opponents to beat the crap out of each other I won’t be the coward and do that sort of behavior. I’ll go into an all-out, full speed ahead, shoot first and ask questions later, dominate my opponents, mode and when the dust settles you’ll see my hand raised in victory and the Roulette Championship handed to me.

Bea gives a stern look into the camera.

Bea:  What’s that girls? Yes, to Krystal, Johanna, Bella, and Seleana, I look at you as girls and not women as I previously explained. You think you’re better than everyone else and yet none of you have yet to have a long Title reign. You think you’re better than me and that I cannot eliminate you in our match but with that line of thinking you’ve already jinxed yourselves. You think your shit don’t stink but I’ve been told by other wrestlers that when you’re in the bathroom taking a dump they have to wear gas masks to keep from passing out from your stench.

Bea pulls out a small makeup container.

Bea:  In closing I wish to give your four morons a graphic for you to keep in your minds. Please allow me a moment to apply some makeup then you’ll get the message strong and clear.

Bea turns her back to the camera while she looks into a small mirror and applies makeup to her lips. Bea then turns around and even the camera person is surprised by what they get a shot of when Bea presents her makeup to the camera.

Bea:  READ. . .MY. . .LIPS!!!

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

After Bea has allowed enough time for the viewers, and her opponents, to grasp the full intent of the makeup on her lips, she lets out an evil laugh.

Bea:  Bwaa haa haa!!! Read my friggin' lips! You four are going down and I’m going into the history books as Sin City Wrestling’s next Bombshell Roulette Champion!

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments and the camera person cuts their camera feed and the screen goes dark.


68
Climax Control Archives / CALEB STORMS AGAIN?
« on: October 14, 2021, 08:36:16 AM »
CALEB STORMS AGAIN?

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart has a match against Caleb Storms at Climax Control 314. There appears to be no reason for this match to be scheduled except to have a similar Champion versus Champion match for the men as they did for the Bombshells at Climax Control 313. Neither Championship is up for grabs so this is more for bragging rights and we already know Bill has the bragging rights being Roulette Champion.

The scene changes and we catch up with Bill and Bea Barnhart at a Starbucks near The Pavilion in Philadelphia. The camera person focuses their camera on the duo as they enjoy their food and drinks.

Bill:  Don’t be upset with your loss to Seleana. There are times in the career of wrestlers where there is that one wrestler that seems to get in the way and they manage to get wins over you. It doesn’t mean you’re not talented. It doesn’t mean you failed. You did well in your matches and came up a bit short. It happens to everyone but some never admit it.

Bea:  You’re right Bill. You have a similar situation with Caleb Storms. You are one win and four loss against him so we have a similar situation with a particular wrestler in our careers.

Bill:  The last match was a Triple Threat but it was still Caleb Storms who pinned me. This match coming up is Champion versus Champion but neither Championship is on the line. We’re simply going at each other as champions as Andrea Hernandez and Krystal Wolfe did at Climax Control 313. You win nothing by winning and you lose nothing with a loss.

Bea:  I’ll be in your  corner as your Manager for your match with Caleb Storms. Never know how desperate he might be to get the win so he doesn’t look like a chump so I have to ensure there’s no interference or violations of the rules on his part.

Bill:  Thanks, Bea, nice to have you keeping an eye on my matches. Let’s  get to The Pavilion as we have a Press Conference for me to answer questions from the news agencies. After we’re done with the Press Conference we need to get back to the hotel so we can comfort Iris for being left alone while we went out for food and drinks and I’ll continue my comments for my match with Caleb Storms at that time.

The camera person cuts their camera feed and the screen goes dark.

PRESS CONFERENCE

Shortly the scene comes on our screen and we see Bill Barnhart at a podium in a conference room at The Pavilion with various reporters from various news agencies waiting to ask him questions.

Bill:  Thanks for coming to my Press Conference. This Press Conference is easy. You ask questions and I answer those questions. If you go outside of that I’ll have you removed from the conference room. Go ahead and ask your questions.

Reporter from ABC Network:  You are a pathetic piece of crap Barnhart! I hope Caleb Storms whups your sorry ass!

Bill:  Apparently ABC stands for Asshole Broadcasting Corporation. Since you don’t want to ask legitimate questions Security will now escort you out of the Conference Room.

The reporter from ABC protests their removal from the venue but they have no choice as Security escorts them out of the Conference Room shutting and locking the door behind them.

Reporter from NBC Network:  Your actions prove you are a jerk! May the bowels of the Earth open up and swallow you!

Bill:  Another jerk from another bogus news organization. What does NBC stand for? Nothing But Crap? See ya later jerk!

Security escorts the reporter from NBC out of the Conference Room.

Reporter from CBS:  Why are you so sure you are going to defeat Caleb Storms when you are 1-4 against him?

Bill:  Because I’m confident of my. . .

The reporter from CBS cuts Bill off while he is answering their question and that ticks Bill off.

Bill:  Didn’t you hear the rules of this Press Conference where I said you can ask questions and I’ll answer them? You interrupted me while I was answering and you cut me off. Bye!

Security escorts the reporter from CBS out of the Conference Room.

Bill:  Apparently CBS stands for Crap Broadcasting Network.

Reporter from CNN:  I hope you get seriously hurt in your match against Caleb Storm and that you have to retire from wrestling!

Bill:  Yet another asshole from a bogus news organization to be escorted out of the Conference Room. I would say CNN stands for Cheapshot News Network. Security! Do your thing!

The reporter from CNN loudly protests their removal from the Press Conference but they are still dumped in the hallway outside of the Conference Room.

Bill:   There appears to be only one reporter left. I know this person well. He is Anthony Amey from WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta.

Anthony Amey from WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta:  Bill I am very sorry my fellow reporters were so rude to you. I admire you for your hard work and dedication in the wrestling ring and the fact that you earned the Roulette Championship in Atlanta recently. Please tell the viewers why you feel you are going to easily defeat Caleb Storms at Climax Control 314.

Bill:  Thank, Anthony, for asking an intelligent question and waiting for my response. I’m confident that I’ll defeat Caleb Storms because he comes into the match thinking he’s better than me. He can think whatever he wants but I know what is behind both of us. Since neither Championship is up for grabs there’s nothing to lose by going all out. My intention is not only to defeat Caleb but to leave him humiliated and shaken that I easily defeated him. Thanks for attending my Press Conference. We have to get back to our hotel to see how Iris is doing.

Bill and Bea exit the Conference Room through the same door that Security threw the obnoxious reporters out into the hallway. When the exiled reporters see Bill and Bea they start shouting out questions and insults but Bill just shoves them out of the way and he and Bea exit the Pavilion and head for their hotel.

ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP HISTORY

When the scene comes on the screen we see Bill and Bea Barnhart, with their English Bulldog Iris, sitting on the couch in their hotel room. Iris missed Daddy Bill so much that she is reclining on the couch with her head on Daddy Bill’s lap so that Daddy Bill can pet her. Iris moans in delight of the petting from Daddy Bill.

Bill:  That Press Conference I had was messed up because the biased reporters there were jerks with the exception of Anthony Amey of WSB-TV Channel 2 out of Atlanta. I told them the rules were they could ask questions and I would answer them and they violated the rules and I had Security take them out of the venue. Oh well. Not everyone is intelligent like me so they act like the fools they really are. So, Caleb, we’re not wrestling in this match with both Championships on the line. We’re not wrestling in this match with your Internet Championship or my Roulette Championship on the line. Just like at Climax Control 313 where Andrea Hernandez and Krystal Wolfe faced off in a Clash of Champions match neither Championship was on the line. It was for bragging rights only and Andrea walked away with her right to brag with her win over Krystal.

Bill pets Iris some more and Iris flops over onto her back to ask Daddy Bill to run her tummy and he does so and Iris lets out a moan of pleasure.

Bill:  So, Caleb, the history we have against each other is that we had five matches and I won one of them and you won four of them. One of those matches was was a Triple Threat but you still got the pinfall on me. Now, Caleb, I’m not here to talk about your Internet Championship, which you’ve had possession of for about six weeks. What I want to discuss is your history with the Roulette Championship because that’s the Championship I currently hold and plan on holding for a very long time. I searched the record books and I found that you defeated Jon Dough on May 13, 2018, to become Roulette Champion but you also lost the Roulette Championship two weeks later, on May 27, 2018, back to Jon Dough. You’ve been non-existent in the Roulette Division since May 27, 2018. What the F...k!!! Three years and five months since you held the Roulette Championship and you walk into our match thinking you’re going to defeat me? What drugs are you taking Caleb? For damn sure you are hallucinating!

Bill lets out a hearty laugh.

HOW DO YOU REALLY FEEL CALEB?

Bill:  Come on Caleb. Level with us okay? Tell us how you really feel about holding onto the Roulette Championship for a mere two weeks before handing it back to the person you previously defeated. Come on! Tell us! Oh you want to be silent on the issue eh?

Bill again releases a hearty laugh.

Bill:  Let me relate an incident that happened to me when I was a little boy growing up in Oakland, California. The incident represents exactly how I know you feel about not being able to hold onto the Roulette Championship. The incident also represents why I’m the Roulette Champion now and you’re not. The town of Santa Cruz is about seventy-five miles South of Oakland. Our family went there a lot during the Summer as they have an historic Boardwalk and many great rides, games, and several outstanding restaurants on the pier. During the incident I’m relating to you I was probably five or six years old. I remember standing and watching a ride where the humans on the ride dictated how fast the ride goes around. I was holding my father’s hand and then when I looked up I see that I’m holding the hand of a stranger. I ran around for ten minutes trying to find my parents and then suddenly there they were. That event taught me to keep focused on what is going on around me at all times. I took that focus into the sport of wrestling and the Roulette Championship I have around my waist proves that.

Bill reaches to the coffee table and picks up the Roulette Championship and holds it up for the camera to get a shot of.

Bill:  So when I was a child I learned a valuable lesson to stay focused and not to lose track of where I am at all times. Unfortunately you never learned that lesson Caleb. If you had learned that lesson you would not have defeated Jon Dough for the Roulette Championship only to let him defeat you, and regain the Roulette Championship from you, two weeks later. That’s not a shame on Jon Dough for regaining the Championship he lost to you. It is a shame on you for allowing him to earn it away from you two weeks after you obtained it.

Bill returns the Roulette Championship to the coffee table.

Bill:  I have no clue what you’re doing Caleb and apparently you have no clue what you are doing. I know you’re likely to repeat, over and over and over again, that you defeated me four times in five matches and that makes you superior to me. Maybe in your mind that’s the result you come up with but in my mind. Since I’m holding the Roulette Championship, that you’ve not held again since you last held possession of it three years and five months ago, I have bragging rights so that ends that conversation.

WHAT’S THE BOTTOM LINE?

Bill:  What’s the bottom line Caleb? I know what my bottom line is but the world is curious what you think your bottom line is. Maybe instead of it being your bottom line I suppose we could classify your demise in our match as your rock bottom. Har har har!!!

Bill recovers from his laughing to continue commenting to Caleb Storms.

Bill:  Caleb since there’s nothing involved in this match, except bragging rights on who can perform better in the ring, since our Championships are not up for grabs, this match comes down to one thing. That one thing is which of us can pound their opponent into defeat and walk away with the focus and attention of the other wrestlers and the fans? I’m not a bad guy Caleb. I try to get along with everyone. Although I’ll greet you when we are passing each other, I’ll talk with you leading up to our match, and I’ll be nice and shake your hand before our match starts and wish you luck. . .as you’re damn sure gonna need luck to hang with me in this match. . .when the bell rings I’m launching myself into full attack mode. I’ll be on you so fast you won’t know what happened and I won’t lay off you until the bell rings and my hand is raised in victory. To give you a mental image try to imagine you’re a smart ass kid and you see a Hornet’s nest. So you grab a stick and start beating on the Hornet’s nest. Of course the Hornets go into attack mode and you cannot run fast enough to escape their assault and they continue to sting the crap out of you until you go unconscious. Yeah, Caleb, my beat down of you is gonna go just like that.

Bill looks over at Bea.

Bill:  Bea will you please tell the viewers, and Caleb Storms, if I’m a nice person or a mean person?

Bea:  Bill is one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. Bill helps others with their wrestling. Bill obeys the rules of the matches he’s involved in. But on the other end of the scale Bill is one of the most dedicated wrestlers in the business and you’re in for a match from hell from Bill at Climax Control 314. Just giving you a heads up what you’re about to get yourself into so that you can’t complain and claim that nobody told you what was coming.

Bill:  Thanks Bea.

Bill informs the camera person he is done with his comments for this presentation. While the camera person begins shutting down his camera feed we watch as Daddy Bill continues to caress Iris and rub her tummy much to her enjoyment.


69
Climax Control Archives / THIS IS MY FOURTH ATTEMPT AGAINST SELEANA ZDUNICH AND I NEED TO MAKE IT COUNT
« on: October 06, 2021, 08:01:07 AM »
THIS IS MY FOURTH ATTEMPT AGAINST SELEANA ZDUNICH AND I NEED TO MAKE IT COUNT

Narrator:  Bea had a talk with me before I came on the air and she discussed two things with me. The first is that she is thrilled that her husband, Bill, won the Roulette Championship against Miles Kasey and Lincoln Daniels. The second is that she knows she has her work cut out for her in her match against Seleana Zdunich at Climax Control 313 having lost her three previous matches against her. With that said I turn you over to Bea Barnhart.

THE TRUTH

The scene changes to a shot of Bea Barnhart in her hotel room in Washington, DC.

Bea:  I’m going to be honest with you. I’ve had three matches against Seleana Zdunich and I lost all of them by pinfall. The first two matches, one at Climax Control 261, on March 1, 2020, and another on November 8, 2020, at Climax Control 285, but those were when I was very new to the sport of wrestling. Those losses I discard as losses that came due to my inexperience. But the loss I took against Seleana on September 12, 2021, at Violent Conduct VII, I cannot explain it away with the comment that I’m new to the sport of wrestling. Nope. I’ve been wrestling for over one and a half years. To put it in simple terms I let that match at Climax Control 285 slip through my hands. It was my fault and I accept that. But now I have a fourth match against Seleana and this time I plan on redeeming myself with a win over her. Will it be easy? Nope. Will it be fun? Yep! Will I come away from the match with the win? I damn sure plan on it! So what’s my strategy you ask? Nice question but I’ll not give away my game plan so that Seleana will have knowledge of what I have planned for her in the match. Seleana, and everyone else, has to wait until October 10, 2021, to find out what I bring to the match.

Bea pauses for a moment before returning to her comments.

YOU DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE WITHOUT HESITATION

Bea:  Without giving away my game plan for the match I’ll give you a general example of what I mean when I say I’ll do whatever it takes to win this match against Seleana. I preface my comments with the question WOULD YOU RUN INTO A BURNING CAR OR BUILDING TO RESCUE STRANGERS? when they are no Emergency Services personnel around to save those people from the fire? I know most of you are staring at your screen wondering what the hell I’m talking about. You want to know what running into a burning building or a burning car to rescue strangers has to do with my match against Seleana. My answer to that question is YES! I would run into a burning car or building to rescue strangers if Emergency Services personnel were not available. I know the question on your minds is why would I do that right? Think hard on what I’m saying. What if it was your family or close friends stuck in the burning building or car and they couldn’t get out of the burning car or building without assistance from Emergency Services personnel? Wouldn’t you want someone to help try to rescue them before the Emergency Services personnel arrive to attempt a rescue?  What if everyone stood around and let your family die instead of trying to help them? What if Firemen, Police, and Paramedics at the scene stated IF ONLY SOMEONE HAD GONE INTO THE CAR OR BURNING BUILDING AND GOT THE PEOPLE OUT THEY WOULD BE ALIVE TODAY. Think hard on that! It could be your wife, son, daughter, mother, father, etc., who nobody tried to rescue because they just stood around listening to the screams of the trapped and dying people and didn’t care to help them. Then how the hell would you feel? Wouldn’t you ask yourself, a thousand times over, why someone didn’t have the compassion and courage to rescue them? I would! The simple concept is in the situation I mentioned with the burning car or building you just do what needs to be done. . .period. . .and you don’t think about yourself and whether you’ll survive the attempt or not.

Bea again pauses for a short time to allow the viewers to think on what she just stated.

Bea:I know what some of you are thinking. You say that running into a burning building or burning car to rescue someone instead of waiting for Emergency Services personnel to do it is violating the law. I say otherwise. Saving someone’s life when they are trapped in a burning car or burning building is not violating the law. What it does is shows that you care for others and you’ll risk your life to save someone in need. You simply do whatever it takes. In my upcoming match, which is my fourth match against Seleana, I’ll walk into the match and do whatever it takes to win but without violating the rules of the match. By winning this match within the rules I’ll rise up in the rankings and then you’ll see what Bea Barnhart is really about.

Bea calls to her husband Bill to please come into camera view and to bring his Roulette Championship and he does.

Bill:  Bea this is your air time. Why did you call me to come into camera view and take up your air time? I can present my comments when I have my next match.

Bea:  Because I want the world to see that you did what I mentioned in my comments today. You went into your Roulette Championship match and did what needed to be done and within the rules of the match. I’m proud of you Bill. Although I would have liked to be the first Barnhart to win a Singles Championship you did it first and I commend you for your accomplishment. I hope you hold the Roulette Championship for a long time.

Bill:  Me too Bea. But whatever happens. . .it happens. . .and we have to be ready to accept it. I got tons of support in our home area of Atlanta, Georgia, but I’m sure I’ll experience tons of hate once I perform outside of Georgia. Eventually the fans will get behind me and support me once they find out what a great Roulette Champion I am. I’ll gladly face off against anyone to defend the Championship. Bea your time will come. Take it one match at a time. Thanks for allowing me into your air time but you need to present comments for your match so I’ll back away and take Iris out for a walk to stay out of your camera range.

Bill gets Iris and the two go out for a walk. Bea returns to the camera for her comments on her upcoming match against Seleana Zdunich.

WINNING SOME BATTLES DOESN’T MEAN YOU WON THE WAR

Bea:  I know I’ve mentioned this before but I feel it is important to mention it again. Would you rather have 10 matches and win 9 of them but in the 10th match which is a Championship match you lose and do not obtain the Championship or would you rather lose 9 of those 10 matches but in the 10th match you win the match and the Championship with that win? Most of you would say win 9 out of 10 matches but then you lose the opportunity to obtain a Championship. I’d rather lose 9 of the 10 matches then win the match that counts for the Championship. It isn’t how many battles you win during a war. . .what counts if winning the one battle that wins the war overall. Although I lost the first three battles I’ve had against Seleana I’ll walk away from our fourth match as the winner.

Bea smiles into the camera.

Bea:  Seleana I’ll admit that in our previous three matches you had my number which means you had the better performance in those matches than I did. But our forth match is different because I have your number. To add to it I now have an unlisted number and with only days until our match you don’t have enough time to figure out what that unlisted number is. I improve in every match and I’ve improved to where, in our forth match, you lose and I win. While you think you know everything and cannot make mistakes I know differently. While I strive to improve in each match you seem to believe you don’t need to make improvements in your wrestling. We’ll find out soon which one of us is right.

Bea appears to be ready to stand up and end her comments but she remains seated and looks deeply into the camera.

Bea:  Seleana you saw that on Monday, October 5, 2021, Facebook and several of their associated sites crashed and were wiped off the face of the planet for around six hours. Do you know what the official answer was from Facebook? They claimed their “Programmers” and “IT Techs” installed an update and that update wiped out all the information in their servers that identifies their domain to the DNS system. What? Talk about a bullshit excuse! How can you install an update to your site, which your people did many times over the life of Facebook, and this time you happen to screw things up so much that the DNS system couldn’t find you for six hours? There’s more to this than we are being told by Facebook. If you look at the timing the outage started when the Whistleblower from Facebook began their testimony against Facebook. How “convenient” to lose Facebook for six hours so that the site wouldn’t be flooded with comments about the Whistleblower’s testimony against them. When the testimony was over suddenly Facebook is back online. So, Seleana, what’s going to be your bullshit excuse for why you lost to me at Climax Control 313? Will you claim you did an update and your system crashed? Will you claim that I cheated you out of a win? Will you claim that the fan in the third row of seats was giving you funny looks and you got distracted? There’s not enough bullshit in the world for you to talk your way out of this loss and to explain away my win over you. I’m here to make a point and you just happen to be the person opposite me in the ring when I make that point.

Bea informs the camera person she is ready to make her last comment and then they can cut the camera feed. The camera person acknowledges Bea’s comment.

TIME IS ON MY SIDE

Bea:  Seleana I’m sure that since you won our previous three matches that you feel you have all the time in the world remaining. You probably feel time is endless and that you will defeat me again. Trust me when I tell you that the sands of time are dropping in the hourglass and when the last grain of sand drops to the bottom of the hourglass I’ll end up with my hand raised in victory over you. See you on Sunday.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bea stands up and walks out of camera range and the camera person calls into the Network and they regain control of the air time.


70
Climax Control Archives / I WILL BECOME SIN CITY WRESTING'S NEXT ROULETTE CHAMPION
« on: October 01, 2021, 10:15:29 AM »
I WILL BECOME SIN CITY WRESTLING’S NEXT ROULETTE CHAMPION

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart is wrestling in his home area. He is from Lawrenceville, Georgia, and Atlanta is about twenty miles West of where he lives. Add to it that he is facing off against Miles Kasey and Lincoln Daniels for the vacated Roulette Championship. Add to it that in Bill’s long wrestling career he has only lost one match in his home area. Combine all of that and you have a winner with Bill Barnhart being the next Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion.

STOP TRYING TO BE SOMETHING YOU’RE NOT

We switch scenes and we see Bill during his Senior year at Skyline High School in Oakland, California. What we see is Bill having a disagreement with some of the other students at the school.

Bill:  You’re all jealous of me because I’m better at sports than you are! So what do you do? You try to get others to believe you’re good in baseball, football, and track like I am. You know I’m in the top three in each of those sports and since you can’t compete with me you hurl insults instead. STOP TRYING TO BE SOMETHING YOU’RE NOT as it only makes you look stupid.

Several of the sports Coaches walk up and stand between Bill and the students who are taunting him.

Coach:  What the hell is going on here? I know who Bill Barnhart is as he’s one of our top athletes in Baseball, Football, and Track. Who are you punks who are harassing him?

None of the students harassing Bill are willing to answer the question so they turn and run away. The Coach looks at Bill.

Coach:  Bill I’m sorry those punks harassed you. That type of thing happens to most of us who are great in our sport. Before you ask I will tell you it also happened to me. Just do the best you can in the sports you are in and leave the rest to destiny.

Bill:  Thanks Coach!

As we hear that comment the scene begins to fade out and we are taken to the medical practice of Doctor Kim in Duluth, Georgia.

MEETING WITH SENOR VINNIE

We are at Beto’s Tacos restaurant in Lawrenceville, Georgia, where we see Bill Barnhart and Senor Vinnie having lunch. We listen in on their conversation.

Bill:  When are you returning to active wrestling Vinnie? Not the same without you around.

Senor Vinnie:  I’ll be back shortly. Just needed to let my injury heal so that I have no reservations about giving one hundred percent in all my matches.

Bill:  Once you are back in action we need to ask to be sent after the Tag Team Championship. Would be great if the two of us could obtain that Championship.

Senor Vinnie:  When we win the Tag Team Championship you need to promise me you will do something for me. If you fail to do this item after we are crowned Tag Team Champions I’ll end our association as a Tag Team. Deal?

Bill:  Depends upon what you have in mind for me to do. I’m up for just about anything you know.

Bill picks up his drink, a beer, and he sips a bit of it.

Senor Vinnie:  When we win the Tag Team Championship you need to go see my friend, Lolita, for him to give you a Brazilian Wax treatment.

Bill:  What in the world is a Brazilian Was treatment?

Bill lifts his beer glass again and drains all the beer from his glass into his mouth but he holds it in his mouth for a bit before attempting to swallow it.

Senor Vinnie:  It is a special procedure where they place substances on your pubic area then rip the substances off so all the hair comes off and your pubic area is a smooth as a baby’s butt.

Bill’s eyes get huge and he spews all the beer in his mouth out and it goes all over Senor Vinnie and their dining table. The other customers in Beto’s Tacos stare wondering what in the hell is going on.

Bill:  What the. . .

Senor Vinnie:  Stop right here Bill. Don’t say it. This is a family restaurant and there are children present.

Bill:  I’m sorry about that Vinnie. I was caught off guard. I guess getting a Brazilian Wax treatment is what it takes to keep you as my trusted friend and Tag Team partner after we win the Tag Team Championship so be it.

Senor Vinnie:  Waiter! Please bring more beers for myself and Bill. Come to think of it beers on me and Bill for everyone here in Beto’s Tacos!!!

Everyone in Beto’s Tacos who is old enough to legally drink cheer Bill and Vinnie for their generous offer. The scene fades out as they are celebrating.

VISIT WITH DOCTOR KIM

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bill is talking with his family physician, Doctor Kim, about his attempt to help Bill keep his inner demon inside the majority of the time. This goes back to when Bill saw Doctor Kim for assistance in controlling the inner demon rather than letting the inner demon control him.

Doctor Kim:  Bill you have to keep your inner demon in check to the best of your abilities or you will end up with another situation that nearly caused you to lose your wrestling career. I’ve given you numerous things you can do that will help. I know you previously let your inner demon out many times against your half-brother Chris Shipman, and in one case you nearly ended not only his wrestling career, but also his life, but you don’t have him to deal with any longer so please work hard to keep your inner demon inside so nobody gets hurt.

Bill:  Thanks Doctor Kim. I’ll do my best as I always do. The problem I have is when opponents cheat, violate the rules, attack me outside the ring, or hire interference on our match, then I can’t control the inner demon and it comes out. However I’ll do what I can do retain the inner demon in my match in Atlanta soon for the Roulette Championship.

SWEETWATER MIDDLE SCHOOL PRESENTATION TO BILL

The scene shifts once more and we see Bill Barnhart in front of Sweetwater Middle School in Lawrenceville, Georgia, where a lot of his neighbors have children attending school there. Since Bill is a local legend, and well liked in the Atlanta Metro area and the State of Georgia, some of the students asked if they could give a short performance for Bill Barnhart since he’s wrestling in Atlanta on October 10, 2021, in a Roulette Championship Match. We listen in. . .

Student Spokesperson:  Bill we are honored for you to visit our school today. We have a short presentation for you to show how much we appreciate you and the attention you have brought to the Atlanta Metro Area specifically in Lawrenceville. We prepared a modified version of a song most people know and it relates to your upcoming match where we want to see you totally destroy Miles Kasey and Lincoln Daniels so you become the next Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion. Are you ready Bill?

Bill:  I’m always ready.

Student Spokesperson:  Let’s do this students!

All Students in Singing Group:

If you’re happy and you know it kick their ass. . .
If you’re happy and you know it kick their ass. . .
If you’re happy and you know it and you really want to show it. . .
If you’re happy and you know it kick their ass!!!

Bill cheers the students for their song and he promises them he will kick the asses of Lincoln Daniels and Miles Kasey. Bill then informs the Principal of Sweetwater Middle School that he will make a substantial financial donation to the school so the money he donates will remain in Sweetwater Middle School and not get into the hands of Gwinnett County Public Schools.

>The scene now shifts to current time where Bill Barnhart is presenting comments on his upcoming match for the Roulette Championship from his home in Lawrenceville, Georgia.

NOBODY INTIMIDATES ME

Bill:  Thank you for joining me in my home for my presentation of my comments for my Roulette Championship match at Climax Control 312. You notice Bea and Iris are not with me during this presentation. The reason Bea is not present, even though she serves as my Manager, is that she’ll take care of things when the match takes place. She told me what I have to say to Miles and Lincoln is sufficient to get the message through to them.

Bill gives a thumbs-up in to the camera.

Bill:  I’ll start my comments by stating that over my wrestling career I’ve only lost one match in my home area. With an impressive record like that do you, Miles honestly believe you’re going to walk into my home area of Atlanta and defeat me? Hell no! I’m not gonna let some piss ant from the United Kingdom come into my home area and get over on me. And what about you Lincoln? I see you’re from Valdosta, Georgia, which we from the Atlanta Metro area consider to be part of Florida and the poor part of our State. Do you think you’re gonna drive up from Valdosta and defeat me in my home area? I’ve had dozens of matches in my home area over my wrestling career and I only lost one of those matches. I’ll not let down the fans of Georgia, and specifically the fans of Atlanta, by allowing either of you to walk away as Roulette Champion. You two have a better chance of finding a discarded lottery ticket on the sidewalk, every day of the week, that you can cash in for one million dollars for each lottery ticket, than you have of defeating me. Add to it that this match is Roulette Rules, with the Roulette Division being mostly focused on Hardcore and extreme type of matches, and you have two things working in my favor which are home advantage and the fact that I’m outstanding when it comes to Hardcore and extreme type matches.

Bill pauses for a drink of water and a bite of pizza then he continues.

Bill:  Miles. . .Lincoln. . .you’ve heard me talk about the enormous feud I had with my half-brother Chris Shipman. You know that while we worked in another Federation we had some of the most violent, demonic, evil, disgusting, and life-threatening matches known to the sport of wrestling. Most of the match types we were assigned two are now banned world-wide as they are too disgusting, evil, and stomach-churning that they had to ban them for eternity. If you two don’t believe what I’m telling you about those violent feud matches with my half-brother Chris Shipman please talk to Goth as he was running that wrestling federation at that time. He will tell you what I said is the truth. If you want to take it one step further if you have the resources to find the long lost missing half-brother of mine, Chris Shipman, so you can ask him directly if I speak the truth, then please do so.

Bill pauses for another drink of water then he looks intently into the camera.

Bill:  So, guys, do you honestly think the Roulette wheel for our match can land on anything that would make me cringe or back down? HELL NO!!! Nothing on the Roulette Wheel can turn me away from this match. Another thing for you two to think about is that my half-brother Chris Shipman vowed to kill me because he was rightfully convicted of the death of our sister but he tried to blame her death on me but the evidence proved he was responsible for her death. Look around and answer this question. Do you see Chris Shipman anywhere? Do you see him working here in Sin City Wrestling? No you don’t. I was too much for Chris to handle and he went off somewhere. Where did he go? I honestly don’t give a damn. I don’t care if he is still alive or not. Think hard on this information. If you have one of the most aggressive, evil, demonic, hateful, and violent wrestlers ever in the sport of wrestling, in Chris Shipman, and he’s nowhere to be found these days, but I’m still active in wrestling, what the hell does that tell you? It tells you I’m a hell of lot more than Chris Shipman could handle. Trust me when I tell you that Shipman was ten times the wrestler that you two combined are and I made him go away. There’s nothing you can do to make me lose and go away. I’ll become Sin City Wrestling’s next Roulette Champion and you cannot do a damn thing to stop me. You two must be smoking drugs in a bong if you think you’re going to defeat me.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Barnhart lets out a rip snorting laugh at his bong comment that shakes the camera person’s camera. The camera person recovers from the snorting laugh and Bill looks into the camera and continues his comments.

SO NICE TO BE WRESTLING IN MY HOME AREA

Bill:  Okay guys time to get more information into your heads. I know. . .I know. . .it hurts your heads to have information placed into them because you two have limited brain capacity. While I’m over here with a 130 IQ, which is in the top five percent in the world, your combined IQ’s are probably not even half of mine. Sorry that information like this flowing into your heads are causing you severe headaches but you need to hear the truth even though the truth hurts.

Bill holds one finger in front of the camera.

Bill:  First item is that over my wrestling career I’ve wrestled in my home area a dozen times. Of those dozen times I only lost one match and I’ll explain how that loss took place so you can see that the person who won that match didn’t get the win directly over me. If you think you two can come into my home area of Atlanta, with me coming in with a winning percentage of 92 percent AT HOME and a losing percentage of 8 percent at home and then one of you will walk away the winner of our match? Dream on fools.

Barnhart holds two fingers in front of the camera.

Bill:  I’ll explain the match I lost in my home area of Oakland, California. It was a Hardcore Rules match in a Boeing 747 parked at Oakland Airport. The participants included myself, Dmitri, and Casey Williams. What happened is that Dmitri and Casey went up the stairway to the First Class Lounge and were fighting it out while I was in the main area of the 747. As I walked over to the stairway to join them in the First Class Lounge one, or both of them, managed to kick the stairway loose and it crashed down and knocked me to the floor of the 747. Casey and Dmitri kept fighting up in the First Class Area as I was recovering from having a heavy steel staircase fall on top of me. I got to my feet and was regaining my composure. I was looking around to see if Dmitri and Casey were down in the lower level with me and just as I was about to turn around to look up to the First Class Lounge Casey was able to shove Dmitri through the opening to the lower level. With my back turned I didn’t know what hit me. It was only after the match was over and I watched the replay I realized it was Dmitri who was thrown down the opening and landed on me. I got knocked to the floor again while Casey jumped down from the First Class Area and pinned Dmitri for the win. Did you two clowns hear that? DMITRI got pinned for the loss not me. CASEY pinned DMITRI, and not me, for the win. Even with that loss let me remind you or something. You would think Casey Williams would be all brave and bold and accept a challenge to wrestle me after that win right? Nope! I’ve challenged Casey numerous times and he has backed down every time. If that doesn’t wake you two buttheads up then you two are in a coma.

Bill holds up three fingers this time.

Bill:  We’re wrestling at the McCamish Pavilion which is located on the campus of the Georgia Institute of Technology. This venue for Climax Control 312 is located about twenty five miles from our home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. Lincoln, have to travel about two hundred fifty miles from the poor part of Georgia to get to Atlanta to stink up my home area. As for you, Miles, there’s no way in hell you’re coming from the United Kingdom to get over on me in my home area. I never back down and if you two believe you’re going to make me back down you are certifiably insane.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bill:  Miles when I saw we were facing off for the vacated Roulette Championship I thought to myself that this would be a great match for me, and a good match for you, with you being on the losing end of the match. I felt Management did the best they could to find someone who could possibly give me a challenge for the Roulette Championship. Even though you’re half as talented as I am in the wrestling ring I felt you could give me a fairly decent match. But how about you Lincoln? You only got into this match as an after-thought. When the match was originally booked it was me and Miles. That equates into two wrestlers are serious about the sport of wrestling. Well more like one-and-a-half wrestlers who are serious about the sport of wrestling because I’m 100 percent serious about the sport of wrestling and Miles is about fifty percent serious about the sport of wrestling. I guess Management wanted to throw a comedy factor into our match so they assigned you to our match to make it a Triple Threat for the Roulette Championship. Yes, Lincoln, you’re only in this match for two reasons. One reason is that you’re from the State of Georgia so they felt sorry for you that you were not in a match at Climax Control 312 in Atlanta, Georgia, and the second reason is that you are the comedy factor for our match so the fans will get a few laughs watching you stumble around the ring.

Bill laughs then returns to his comments.

Bill:  Lincoln. . .Miles. . .after I pumped so much information and truth into your heads that you’re about to pass out I’ll present my closing comments concerning our upcoming match. When we do a head-to-head comparison of the three of us there’s the fact that I’m more than twice the wrestler you two are combined. Also you two may be familiar with one of the most classic taglines in the history of retailing and that is the one for Doublemint Gum. The tagline slogan was sung as Double your pleasure, double your fun, with Doublemint, Doublemint, Doublemint Gum! Oh boy! That fits our match perfectly as I get double the pleasure and double the fun having two opponents to destroy. There’s no doubt that I’m the wrestler to beat in this match. There’s no doubt you two are going to try to double-team me to take me out of the match. No matter what you do. . .no matter what you try. . .no matter how hard you try to fight against me. . .no matter if you hire your friends to interfere in our match…nothing is going to work to allow either of you to defeat me. I’ll swoop down like a tornado and rip through you like a tornado through a trailer park so that nothing is left standing. You two trying to defeat me is one thing. Accomplishing the deed is another. While you two will try and fail. . .I will do and succeed. Once I’m crowned as Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion I plan on holding the Championship for a very long time. You two are, simply put, shitty wrestlers, and I have no clue how you got assigned to this match against me. But, oh well, that’s a decision made by Management and the three of us will be active in our match. Of course I’ll be ten times more active in our match than you two combined so enjoy what you can from it. And, finally, to close my comments for our match, I wish to show a graphic of the day you two shitty wrestlers were born.

The Network puts up the graphic Bill Barnhart sent them for this portion of his comments and we both smile and gasp.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bill:  Har har har!!! Sorry I have to be that graphic in depicting you two as shitty wrestlers but I do what I need to do to get my point across. I’ll make sure Bea, as my Manager in my corner, brings our pooper scooper that we use to pick up the poop of Iris so that after I soundly defeat the two of you we can scrape up your shitty selves and dispose of you in the trash can at ringside. I’m gonna have an extreme amount of fun in our match while you two are going to experience an extreme amount of suffering. See you on Sunday, October 10, 2021, at Climax Control 312, that is if the two of you still have the courage to show up and face me. And, just so you know ahead of time, I assure you that after I defeat you two and become Roulette Champion you two will no longer be constipated as I’m going to beat the shit out of both of you.

Bill bursts out in uncontrollable and sinister laughing while the cameraman places their camera into a slow fade out. Bill continues laughing as the scene eventually fades out and the Network returns to regularly scheduled programming.


71
Climax Control Archives / MY MY MY...MYRA GONNA LOSE AGAIN
« on: September 23, 2021, 01:08:24 PM »
MY MY MY. . .MYRA GONNA LOSE AGAIN

Narrator:  Although Bea gave a fantastic performance at Violent Conduct VII against Seleana Zdunich she is more determined than ever to not let a loss in a match where she performed well and she is going into her match against Myra Rivers at Climax Control 311 with the intent of walking away with the win.

The scene changes to the inside of a classroom at Berkmar High School in Lilburn, Georgia.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

TEACHING THE TRUTH

Bea Barnhart walks into the classroom and into camera view and smiles into the camera. She walks to the front of the class and while she is walking we notice a desk for the teacher at the front of the class, about twenty desks for students, and a counter with sinks to the side of the room. Bea reaches the teacher’s desk and she sits on the desktop waiting for students to arrive in the classroom. After a short time the room fills with students and Bea begins her presentation to the class.

Bea:  My name is Bea Barnhart and I’m your teacher for this class. The school contacted me to present the concept of never giving up, Most of you probably know I live in Lawrenceville, Georgia, along with my husband Bill and our English Bulldog Iris. We live about five miles from Berkmar High School. The class I’m teaching today is a combination of history, logic, and common sense, so pay attention as your future depends upon what you learn today.

Several students raise their hands to ask questions but Bea puts them on hold.

Bea:  Please wait to ask questions until after I’ve presented information otherwise you won’t know what you’re asking about. As you know I’m one of the wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling and our next event is Climax Control 311 which takes place in Orlando, Florida, and the location of the wrestling event is at Disney World.

Several students raise their hands again to ask questions and again Bea puts the students on hold.

Bea:  Please wait. Please be patient. This class is a short one and I want to present information so that your questions will make sense. I’m facing off against Myra Rivers at Climax Control 311. At the previous event, Violent Conduct VII, I lost my match against Seleana Zdunich. Our match was to allow Management to see which of us would get a push and which of us would have to remain where we were at that time. I lost the match but I gave an outstanding performance. Even with the loss I see that Management took note and gave me this match with Myra Rivers who lost her Championship match at Violent Conduct VII which was against Amber Ryan for Amber’s Bombshell Championship which is the top Championship in the Women’s division. The difference is that while I performed well in my match and exited the match in outstanding condition Myra got the crap beat out of her and even with two weeks between Violent Conduct VII and our upcoming event Climax Control 311 Myra is still suffering physical damage. Now you can start asking questions.

Student One:  Isn’t wrestling fake and nothing more than acting like actors do in movies?

Bea:  No. The wrestlers need to be in great physical condition and know their way around the wrestling ring to ensure they don’t get hurt giving and taking the holds, blows, maneuvers, etc., during the match. Feel free to review the Bombshell Championship Match from Violent Conduct VII where Amber Ryan defended the Bombshell Championship against Myra Rivers. Take note that both took significant damage during the match, with Myra taking the most damage, but if you take into account if they were not in great physical condition, and didn’t know their way around the wrestling ring during matches, both would have ended up in the Intensive Care Unit. Wrestling is not faked.

Student Two:  I follow Sin City Wrestling and I know that you haven’t won a lot of your matches and I’m sure Myra has won more matches than you have. Why do you feel qualified to comment that you are going to defeat her with your current win-loss record?

Bea:  That’s a great question and I have a great answer. I want all of you to think about this question.  If you were in a war where you had to fight ten battles which would you choose? Would you choose that you could win nine of those ten battles but when you get into the tenth and final battle, which decides the winner of the overall war, you would lose that battle and lose the overall war, or would you rather lose the first nine battles then win the tenth and final battle to win the overall war? Let me see a show of hands so I can take a tally.

When Bea asks how many of the students would want to win the first nine battles then lose the tenth which causes you to lose the war ten hands go up. When Bea asks how many of the students would want to lose the first nine battles but win the tenth battle that wins the overall war ten hands go up so the students are split.

Bea:  Thank you for your honest feedback. My personal opinion is that there’s no reason to win nine of the ten battles just to lose the tenth and final battle and lost the war. Since the concept is to win the overall war even if you lost the first nine battles then you win the tenth and final battle to win the overall war you still get the overall win. That’s why I don’t do like other wrestlers and whine and bitch and moan and cry over a loss in the wrestling ring as I know I can win the overall war.

As Bea finishes her comments the bell rings indicating this class is over. The students get up from their desks and walk out of the classroom to go to their next class. Bea exits the classroom and the camera person keeps focused on her until she steps into the hallway and the classroom door closes behind her.

MANILA, PHILIPPINES, SENIOR YEAR HIGH SCHOOL

We are taken back to when Bea was a Senior at her High school in Manila, Philippines. The scene opens where Bea is leaving the school to return home for the day and she is confronted by several mean girls. Bea tries to ignore them but the mean girls decide to follow closely and harass her.

Bea:  Please leave me alone. I don’t want anything to do with you. The only reason you mean girls pick on students like me is because we’re intelligent, pretty, and get great grades, and you are dumb, homely, and barely pass your classes.

The means girls, upset at Bea’s comments, rush to stand in front of her to prevent her from getting to her transportation to return to her home. Bea again tries to get them to back off.

Bea:  I’ll ask you again to please get away from me and leave me alone. Although I don’t like to fight if you continue being aggressive I’ll have no choice but to take action against you.

The means girls get shocked looks on their faces and they decide to inflict damage on Bea. One of them rushes Bea and Bea side-steps them and they stumble past her and she kicks their legs out from under them and the mean girl face plants into the dirt. The next mean girl runs up and takes a swing at Bea and Bea blocks the punch with her backpack then she kicks the mean girl in the stomach and when the mean girl doubles over from the kick Bea raises her knee into the face of the mean girl causing the mean girl to drop the ground crying and holding her face. Bea then gives a stern look to the other mean girls.

Bea:  Anyone else want some of me? Bring it on!

At that comment the mean girls run off. Bea is satisfied she did what she needed to do to obtain the victory and she begins walking toward where the transportation is for her to travel back home. As she’s walking toward her transportation she is approached by one of the Faculty at the High School who saw the entire incident. The Faculty member asks Bea if she wants the school to take disciplinary action against the mean girls and Bea informs her that she feels the mean girls learned a valuable lesson and will not harass her any longer. Bea informs the Faculty member she would rather that the mean girls learn that accomplishing their academics is more important for their future than harassing other students. The Faculty member thanks Bea for her honesty and she turns to return inside the school while Bea continues to her transportation where she gets on the Jeepney and it drive off.

BACK TO TODAY

When we return to today we get a shot of Bea Barnhart at her home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. She is sitting in her living room where the camera person is set up to air her comments for her upcoming match against Myra Rivers. Bea’s husband, Bill, and their English Bulldog Iris, are going around the house and occasionally the camera catches a shot of the two but Bill stays out of Bea’s presentation as he doesn’t wish to interrupt her comments.

Bea:  Welcome to my home where I’ll be presenting comments leading up to my match at Climax Control 311 against Myra Rivers. I was contacted by Anthony Amey, the Sports Anchor for WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta as he wanted to have me on his broadcast. After my broadcast with Anthony I’ll discuss other things concerning my upcoming match.

The Network broadcasting Bea’s comments for her upcoming match has linked up with Anthony Amey at WSB-TV Channel 2 and we see Anthony on the screen.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Anthony:  Hi. I’m Anthony Amey the Sports Anchor for WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta. I contacted Bea Barnhart to ask if she could give me a few minutes on my broadcast to talk about her upcoming match against Myra Rivers at Climax Control 311 and she agreed. Ready for some questions Bea?

Bea:  I’m always ready Anthony. Fire away.

Anthony:  I know your objective is to beat down Myra and walk away the winner of your match but I want to know if you have anything else on your mind.

Bea:  I’m going down to Orlando, Florida, to put Florida and their residents in their place. Florida claims to be part of the South but the true South consists of Georgia, South Carolina, Alabama, and Mississippi. Florida is made up of mostly migrants from the North who moved to Florida to get better weather so most residents in Florida are transplants and wannabe Southerners. I’m going down to Florida to show them what people from Georgia are really about and I’m returning to Georgia with a win over Myra on my record.

Anthony:  Great! I have just one additional question that was the most asked by the viewers. They want to know, with your record being more losses than wins, why you are so positive going into Climax Control 311.

Bea:  I recently gave a presentation to students at Berkmar High School in Lilburn, Georgia. For the benefit of your viewers I’ll summarize what I told the students. Say you have  two options concerning ten wrestling matches with only the tenth match causing you to win the overall war and walk away the supreme winner. Option one is that you will get to win the first nine matches but when you have your tenth match, the Championship match, you have to lose. Option two is that you will get to lose the first nine matches but when you have your tenth match, the Championship match, you’ll win that match and the Championship. I was surprised that half the students chose option one and the other half chose option two.

Anthony:  I know which one you chose for yourself so please explain it to our viewers.

Bea:  I’m not like other wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling who complain about every loss they take then they turn around and take their mostly losing record and go to Management to demand shots at Championships. I go into every match and give one hundred percent for every match. If I win so be it. If I lose so be it. In the end I’ll get assigned to a Championship match and walk away as the newly crowned Champion. I don’t want to achieve a lot of wins that don’t provide a Championship only to get a shot at a Championship and lose. Again I state that I’m going to Florida to put Myra in her place. I promise you I’ll return to Georgia with the win.

Anthony:  Thanks for your time Bea. We’ll get together again soon.

Anthony’s connection to the broadcast of Bea’s comments is cut and now it is the local camera person broadcasting Bea’s comments for her upcoming match.

Bea:  Hi, Myra, how the hell are you feeling today? Considering the major beat down you took at the hands of Amber Ryan in your attempt to become Bombshell Champion I would say you still feel as crappy as you did when she beat the hell out of you during your match. I bet you’re wondering how I’m feeling today huh? Considering that in my match against Seleana Zdunich I took ninety percent LESS damage than you took against Amber I’m felling fantastic! Even if you healed fifty percent from the damage Amber put on you at Violent Conduct VII that still would put you forty percent behind me. Well, damn, screw you eh! I’m coming into this match at more than ninety percent and even if you healed fifty percent that would bring you up to sixty percent at best. The last time I did calculations something functioning at 90 percent or higher, going up against something functioning at sixty percent or lower, is going to be successful and win the battle. Have fun losing because I’m damn sure going to have fun defeating you in our match.

Bea lets out a sinister laugh.

Bea:  So, Myra, are you asking yourself why I’m laughing? Whether you’re asking or not I’m still going to tell you why I’m laughing. I’m driving down to Orlando, Florida, from my home in Lawrenceville, Georgia, in the Atlanta Metro area, and I’m going to kick your ass, beat you down hard, and walk away as the winner of our match. How do you think you’re going to feel losing our match in your home State? I guess the good part is that you’re going to lose in Orlando, instead of Miami, but still you’ll bring disgrace to the State of Florida.

Bea again lets out a sinister laugh.

Bea:  What’s that Myra? Are you watching my presentation and cursing me out and screaming threats at your screen? Ha ha ha! Nice try when you got your ass handed to you at Violent Conduct VII. Also, Myra, before you go public and spew forth more incorrect information, bullshit, and lies, allow me to inform the viewers of the facts. I come into our match at five feet five inches and one hundred thirty pounds. You come into our match at five feet six inches and one hundred thirty pounds. While you are likely to try to bullshit the viewers by stating you have the height and weight advantage over me I’ve already given them the truth. If you try to bullshit the viewers by trying to convince them that you’ve defeated me many times the truth is that we’ve never had a match against each other. I may not have as many wins in the wrestling ring as you do but I damn sure hold my own in every match and always give a hundred percent. I prefer to make opponents submit but I’ll take the pinfall or disqualification win when they come my way.

This time Bea lets out a laugh that goes beyond sinister to demonic.

WORTHLESS AND SCARED SHITLESS

Bea:  Well, Myra, what in the hell is going to come out of your mouth next other than more lies and bullshit? You can’t brag that you’ve obtained more Championships than I have as we both obtained one. You can’t brag that you’re so great in the wrestling ring when you got beat down extremely hard at Violent Conduct VII and could barely crawl out of the ring under your own power while I was able to walk away from my match instead of needing help to crawl away from the ring like you did. You’ve talked shit for so long and have yet to back it up that you’ve become the main joke of Sin City Wrestling. You’re able to talk a lot of shit but you’re not able to back up your shit talk. In fact, Myra, I see you you as so incompetent, inept, and worthless, that you could drink a gallon of laxative and still not be able to shit.

Bea’s evil laugh is really huge this time and it takes her some time to recover enough to make closing comments. Iris walks into camera view holding one of her favorite Sock Monkey stuffed chew toys in her mouth.

Bea:  Hi Iris. I see you have one of your Sock Monkey stuffed chew toys. Let me ask you a question Iris. If you were in my place in the match against Myra what would you do?

Iris starts to growl and snarl. She then shakes her head violently and the Sock Monkey is getting torn to pieces and stuffing is flying around the room. Once Iris has destroyed her Sock Monkey she sniffs it then lets out a loud snort before turning around and walking away.

Bea:  Nice one Iris. That’s exactly what I plan on doing to Myra in our match. Listen up Myra. I’m not coming into our match with only the intention to walk away with the win. I’m coming into this match to dominate you. I’m coming into this match to humiliate you. I’m coming into this match to beat you down and leave you in a heap like what happened to you at Violent Conduct VII. I don’t care if your feelings get hurt. I don’t care if your body gets hurt. I don’t care how much your cry about your loss to me. I’m walking away the winner of our match and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. Enjoy your freedom leading up to our match because my beat down of you and my win in the match takes away your freedom and places you in bondage. I would ask you not to cry when I defeat you in our match but I know you will anyway. If you do cry about your loss to me then I’ll start calling you Crya Rivers instead of Myra Rivers.

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments. The camera person calls into the Network and the Network switches to regularly scheduled programming.


72
Climax Control Archives / MAL WHAT? MAL WHO?
« on: August 27, 2021, 09:29:06 AM »
MAL WHAT? MAL WHO?

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart is fired up going into the semi-final round of the Internet Championship Tournament. This time he faces Malachi O’Connell and Bill is predicting a quick and easy victory.

The scene changes and we get a shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart relaxing in the venue where the World’s Fair was held in 1962. Bill and Bea are sitting at a table that has a large umbrella to cast shade and both are eating a nice lunch while they watch people walking through the venue. When the camera person informs the two they are live broadcasting they are about to start start their comments when Bill’s cell phone rings.

Bill:  Excuse me for a moment. This is my neighbor, Andrew, in Lawrenceville, Georgia. Andrew I don’t have much time to talk as I’m just starting my comments on my upcoming match against Malachi in the Internet Championship Tournament, so we need to make this call short. How are you and Rebecca doing in Lawrenceville, Georgia?

Andrew:  We’re fine bur the weather is hot and humid and it has been raining off and on for two weeks. Where are you now?

Bill:  We’re in Seattle, Washington. Sin City Wrestling’s Climax Control 310 is being held here. The weather is nice considering we are in Seattle. Right now we’re relaxing at the venue where the World’s Fair was held in 1962.

Andrew:  Seriously! I was at the World’s Fair in Seattle in 1962 when I was 8 years old. I remember a lot of the exhibits and rides from back then. Enjoy your stay in Seattle and I wish you the best of luck in your match against Malachi.

Bill:  Watch the event so you can see me make easy work of Malachi. Sorry to rush off but I have a certain amount of air time and I have to use it wisely so I don’t come up short.

Bill and Andrew end their call. Bill and Bea eat more of their food before presenting comments for Bill’s match against Malachi.

Bill:  Thanks for tuning in for my comments concerning my match against Malachi at Climax Control 310. This is a semi-final round match to see which of us advances to the final match to determine who becomes the next Sin City Wrestling Internet Champion. We all know I’m gonna win it all and walk away as the Internet Champion so my match against Malachi is going to be a squash with me doing the squashing and him being the one squashed. Before I go further with my comments on my upcoming match I want Bea to comment on her match against Roxi Johnson last week and on my upcoming match at Climax Control 310 against Malachi.

Bea:  As Bill’s Manager I’ll be in his corner to ensure there’s no interference or other crap coming from the side of Malachi O’Connell. If you need to come into this match against Bill and cheat, or have interference, then don’t even show up. With that out of the way let me comment on my match against Roxi Johnson at Climax Control 309. Roxi you and everyone else saw that I held my own in our match. I immediately took advantage of you and had you backpedaling and looking for an escape. In the end you managed to set off your four confetti cannons before I could and you legally won the match. I thank you for the opportunity to face you, a very accomplished superstar, and I applaud you on your win. That match means a lot to me and in every match I improve.

Bill:  You shouldn’t feel bad losing to a great wrestler like Roxi. Your time will come when you win the major championships in Sin City Wrestling. Just watch me as I easily defeat Malachi and move on to the finals in the Internet Championship Tournament. Then at that event I’ll prove everyone wrong when I win the Internet Championship. Bea would you give the comparison between myself and Malachi for the viewers?

Bea:  Gladly. Bill comes into this match at six feet four inches and two hundred forty pounds. Malachi comes into this match at five feet ten inches and one hundred eighty pounds. Malachi you’re giving up six inches in height and sixty pounds of weight to Bill. Sorry to inform you but having those two negatives working against you means you’ll lose to Bill so quickly you won’t even remember losing.

Bill and Bea stop talking for a time to watch some people doing stunts while on bikes, skates, and skateboards. When the people pass by and are off in the distance the two return to the camera.

Bill:  Malachi I need to ask you a question. Now I fully understand that with your limited mental capacity any question, even someone asking you how you are doing today, might cause you a brain melt-down since you’re not capable of processing the data but I’ll try anyway. Have you heard of the term FLAPDOODLE? Oh shit! I think I just used a word that caused your brain to have a melt-down. Sorry, Malachi, but I had to ask because it pertains to you. The term FLAPDOODLE is a slang term meaning NONSENSE which also means WORTHLESS and PATHETIC. Hmmm, nonsense, worthless, and pathetic. Three words that describe you perfectly. While you come into our match like a wet noodle I come into our match like a battering ram on amphetamines. You may think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread but I’m in this match to fry your bread and send you home as a loser. Think you can stop me from winning our match? Try. Go ahead and try. No matter what you do you’ll fail.

Bea:  Malachi I can predict what you and your family and friends are going to say. They’ll claim the only reason I’m in Bill’s corner for his match is that I’ll try to cheat and interfere in the match to benefit him. I guess you’re blind. I do not interfere in matches. I don’t cause distractions. I don’t hire interference for the benefit of Bill. What I do as his manager is to ensure that his opponents don’t cause distractions, don’t hire interference, and don’t cause problems to get a cheap win for Bill’s opponent. Malachi if anyone associated with you tries that crap nobody is going to hold me and Bill accountable for the damage we inflict upon you.

Bill and Bea take a break from their comments to finish their food and drinks.

Bill:  Oh, Malachi, I see how you tout yourself as the next best thing in the sport of wrestling. Although to most people that sounds great you have to analyze the statement. Saying that you’re the next best thing in wrestling means you admit you’re not the best thing in wrestling at this time. Me, on the other hand, can boldly and honestly state that I’m the best thing in wrestling and I’m going to be the next Sin City Wrestling Internet Champion after I defeat you and then defeat my opponent in the finals of the Internet Championship Tournament.

Bill laughs loudly then continues with his comments.

Bill:  Malachi you’re probably sitting around thinking hard of how you can portray yourself as anything other than a failure. Good luck with that attempt. From what I’ve seen of you it appears that you run trying to claim that you are some sort of malware that is designed to affect how computers and their programs work. You seem to think you in the sport of wrestling work as malware that affects the performance of your opponents. Think again punk. While you may think you are malware designed to make me malfunction in our match the opposite is true. You don’t seem to understand that I am what they call in the IT world as Anti-Malware. Just as with a computer where someone places malware on your computer to make it malfunction so our computers have anti-malware software installed to detect, block, disable, and destroy, the malware from doing the purpose it was intended to do. Yes, Malachi, no matter what you bring to our match, no matter what moves and holds you attempt you will see that I am the anti-malware to your malware. Boom! Zap! You are stopped and no longer in the Internet Championship hunt.

Bill and Bea give a HIGH FIVE then Bill continues with his comments.

Bill:  Malachi you need to remember how you got to this second round of the Internet Championship Tournament. You faced off against one of the biggest jobbers in the sport of wrestling, both in size and the number of matches he’s required to lose, in The Troll. Defeating that obese guy is nothing for you to brag about. If you want to claim your victory over a wrestler who gets paid to lose then you are mentally ill beyond even what I imagined. Yes I recently also defeated The Troll but I did it amazingly and powerfully unlike how weakly you got the win over The Troll. How? I not only beat his fat ass all over the ring I ended the match by picking his lard ass up over my head and pressing him him up and down, like you do with weights, before letting him down and applying my Barnhart Shoulder Breaker Flying Hammer Lock for the submission. I got here by defeating Agostino Romano who is not a jobber and never has been. Agostino is also ten times the wrestler you are. What does that tell you Malachi? It tells you that when you got assigned to this match with me you were assigned your demise. For darn sure having this upcoming event titled the GOING HOME SHOW is perfect as you’re going home as the loser of our match. Har har har!!!

Bea gives the cut sign to the camera person to state their comments for this broadcast is done. The camera person cuts their camera feed and the screen goes dark.


73
Climax Control Archives / THIS IS GOING TO BE A ROCKY MATCH FOR ROXI
« on: August 19, 2021, 09:50:05 AM »
THIS IS GOING TO BE A ROCKY MATCH FOR ROXI

Narrator:  Bea has captured the attention of Management, and the attention of Candy, and Bea has a match against the very accomplished Roxi Johnson at Climax Control 309. It is called a Four Corner Confetti Match and the winner is the first wrestler to set off all four of their confetti cannons. Bea told me she is fired up and excited about facing off against Roxi Johnson. With my opening comments out of the way I turn you over to Bea Barnhart.

PREPARING FOR THE MATCH

The scene changes and we see Bea Barnhart at a gym but we don’t know the location. Bea is inside a wrestling ring sparring with various opponents. After watching her for a few minutes Bea glances over to see the camera person focused on her so she ends her sparring session. Bea exits the ring and stands on the arena floor in front of the ring drying off with a towel while looking into the camera. Bea places a bottle of water on the ring apron.

Bea:  Nice try to get a lot of video of my sparring for my upcoming match with Roxi Johnson but you only got a few minutes. Did Roxi and her friends send you here to spy on me to try to see what special holds and maneuvers I might bring to the match? You got to see a little bit of the end of my sparring session but you didn’t see what I did prior to the camera focusing on me. Wrestlers have to keep some of what we do out of range of prying eyes so there remains the element of surprise when we execute moves and holds, which opponents are not expecting us to execute, during our real match.

Bea picks up the bottle of water, opens it, and drinks a bit of water, before replacing the cap and returning the bottle of water to the ring apron. Bea grabs the towel to wipe off a bit more.

COMPARISON

Bea:  The first thing I wish to present is my comparison of myself and Roxi. I come into this match at five feet five inches and one hundred thirty pounds. I’m a Technical wrestler but I’m able to mix it up if my opponent wants to brawl or go hardcore. Roxi you come into our match at five feet six inches and one hundred thirty-two pounds and you’re listed as a High Flyer who enjoys a fight and often tries to go for the submission. Since you have only one inch of height and two pounds of weight over me I call this match even.

Bea again picks up the bottle of water and takes a drink then returns the bottle of water to the ring apron.

Bea:  The only so-called perceived advantage for you, Roxi, would be the fact that you’ve held Championships numerous times. That’s a good accomplishment and I can’t take away from you the fact that you’ve been a Champion on several occasions. But just because someone has held championships before doesn’t mean they’re going to come into a match against me and win. No way in hell that’s gonna happen! I’m in this match to win and you need to understand that so that you won’t leave the match with a loss and cry about it.

Bea picks up the bottle of water and finishes it off. She returns the cap to the bottle then launches the bottle toward a trash can that is about ten feet away and the bottle lands neatly in the trash can.

Bea:  Roxi we do not have a history of facing off against each other in the wrestling ring. I understand why that is. It is because at the time I started working as a wrestler on the Roster I was a green newbie and you were at the top of the success ladder in Sin City Wrestling. To have a newbie, who hasn’t proven themselves ye, go up against one of the top superstars isn’t something most wrestling federations do. Management gave me matches against other newbies, then they transitioned me into facing middle-card wrestlers, and then they moved me up to give me several Championship qualifier matches and Championship shots. I appreciate all that has been done for me by Bill and his friends training me and for Management seeing my potential. If you think because we don’t have a history in the ring  that means it equates into you having the advantage in our match, or you think I’m intimidated, you’re wrong. In my life, and my wrestling career, I’ve never let anyone intimidate me. Even if you manage to win this match on Sunday I’ll still respect you and your accomplishments but never will I become intimidated. Yes I know you’re a multiple Champion in Sin City Wrestling. Although that might intimidate others I simply see it as another challenge thrown my way and another opportunity for me to prove myself to Management, the other wrestlers on the Roster, and the fans.

FOUR CORNERS CONFETTI MATCH

Bea:  Roxi the official description of our match, as listed on the Climax Control 309 Card, is the first wrestler to set off all four of their confetti cannons wins! With the classification of the match being a Four Corners Confetti Match, and it states “set off all four of their confetti cannons” for the win, I expect each of us will have a cannon set up in each of the four corners. It is a simple matter of out-maneuvering your opponent and setting off your confetti cannons before your opponent does. Now, Roxi, if you’re thinking it might be amusing for you to run into the corners and set my cannons off in an attempt to prevent me from setting off my own cannons I would expect, since my four confetti cannons were deliberately set off by you, that will equate into a win for me since my four confetti cannons were set off before yours were and that is classified as cheating and violating the rules of the match for you to set mine off. So if you were thinking of trying that. . .don’t do it. . .as I don’t want you crying that you handed a win to me. When I win I want it due to my efforts in the ring and not yours. Thanks for stopping by the gym so I could air some comments. I’ll be presenting more comments later from our hotel room at our hotel near the Cross Insurance Arena.

The camera person ends their camera feed and the screen goes dark.

AT THE HOTEL ROOM OF BILL AND BEA BARNHART

RESEARCH

The scene opens and this time we see Bea Barnhart, her husband Bill Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, in their hotel room at a hotel located near the Arena. The camera person motions they are live broadcasting.

Bea:  Roxi we’ve been relaxing in our hotel room watching replays of your many matches. You’re probably wondering why we’re doing that. That’s a good question and I’ll answer it. Although we are physically present at nearly every wrestling event with Sin City Wrestling you can’t observe every moment of every match. That means you need to sit back and watch all the matches you can of the wrestler, or wrestlers, you are facing. That way you can run the match, stop it, and go into slow-motion mode, as you might pick up on something critical to you winning your match.

Bill:  Here’s an example. There used to be a wrestler in a Federation that was headquartered out of the State of Georgia. His signature move, which often led to a win over his opponents, consisted of wearing down his opponent then hitting them in the head with his elbow. I’m not able to give you the name of the wrestler, or what he called this maneuver, as they are not associated with the Federation we’re in. That means I will not mention another Federation’s name or the wrestler’s name. One of the wrestlers who was on the receiving end of this maneuver, and who lost numerous matches to this wrestler and his move, watched hundreds of hours of this wrestler’s matches. What he found out is that in every case. . .did you get that. . .in every case just before this wrestler was about to execute this maneuver, he would lick his lips. Yes you heard me correctly. He would lick his lips then execute the maneuver. After hundreds of hours of watching the wrestler viewing the matches it became clear to him that the wrestler he was observing always licked his lips before executing the maneuver without fail. The next time he was in the ring against this wrestler he was able to see the lip licking thing by his opponent and he rushed him before his opponent could get the elbow move to the head executed. The wrestler involved was shocked that he lost the match and that his opponent was able to counter so he wasn’t able to execute his signature move. Later he found out what happened and he was shocked that he gave away his move with a simple lick of his lips every time. It was something his did without even realizing he was doing it. Why did I tell you this story? I’ll let Bea answer that.

Bea:  Roxi we’ve watched hours and hours of your matches. We’ve run them over and over. Some parts of the matches we did slow-motion to see if we could pick up something like in the story Bill just told. Although we were not able to find something as obvious as the lip licking of the wrestler in the story we were able to pick up on several quirks that, if I see you about to do one of those quirks, I’ll immediately know what comes next and counter it before you can execute it. So, Roxi, I’m sure you want to know if we found certain quirks, motions, where your eyes are looking a certain way or something else that will notify me that a certain move or hold is about to be attempted. Do you honestly think I’m going to tell you what we found so that you can make changes on something you didn’t even know you were doing? Nah! What we found stays with me in my mind and if I see any of the signs during the match I’ll take advantage of you and get the win. Now you can stress out until our match wondering what we found. Have fun with this.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bea indicates she has a few more items to say as her closing comments. Bea asks the camera person for a zoomed in close-up shot of her face while she comments.

Bea:  Look at this face Roxi. This isn’t the face of a coward. This isn’t the face of someone who steps back from a challenge. This is the face of someone who is confident in what they can do in the wrestling ring. This is the face of someone who has come a long way from her rookie match, which was her first match in Sin City Wrestling, at Climax Control 256 on January 5, 2020. Yes I’ve come a hell of a long way Roxi. I hold my own in the wrestling ring. I accept any type of match Management assigns me to. I never back down from anyone. Maybe you wish to take me lightly and that’s your decision to make. I’m planning on leaving our match with my hand raised in victory which will catapult me to the top of the rankings. Yes, Roxi, I really am that confident of myself!

Bill:  That’s my girl! I’m proud of you Bea. Go into the match and give it all you’ve got and exit the match as the winner.

Bea:  Damn right I will!!!

Bea asks the camera person to end the broadcast and they do and our screen goes dark.


74
Climax Control Archives / A CANDYLAND MATCH? THIS IS GONNA BE FUN!
« on: August 12, 2021, 08:32:56 AM »
A CANDYLAND MATCH? THIS IS GONNA BE FUN!

Narrator:  A Candyland Match? Bill Barnhart against Agostino Romano? Yes you heard correctly. This match is a First Round match for the Internet Championship and the winner moves up in the Tournament to keep winning and get a shot at the Internet Championship. We already know Bill is going to win this Tournament match, and all the others he will be assigned to, and when he faces off for the Internet Championship he will win that match and be crowned the next Sin City Wrestling Internet Championship.

AT THE HOME OF ANDY AND REBECCA EIDE IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

The scene comes into focus as we see Bill and Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, in the backyard of their neighbors Andy and Rebecca Eide.

Bill:  Wow! Your new backyard fence looks great!

Andy:  We had to replace it because someone, or something, came through our yard three weeks ago and broke the gate on the back part of the fence and they also broke the gate leading out of the backyard to go into the front yard of the house. Since the fence was old, most likely it was the original fence from when this housing development was built in 1991, we had to replace it as it was worn down and not worth the time and money to try to repair several portions of it.

Bill:  Who did you get to install your new fence?

Andy:  Our neighbor Edgar does many things and carpentry is one of them. I purchased the fencing material from Home Depot and Edgar and his wife Nellie installed the fence. I’m amazed that in less than five days they had the entire job completed and that included removing the original fence posts which were imbedded in the ground in cement and placing the removed fencing material into the dumpster I rented.

Bill:  If you don’t mind me asking how much was the total cost?

Andy:  First I have to tell you I contacted two fencing companies and one gave me an estimate of $3,500 and the other was around $4,500. I purchased the fencing material at Home Depot for $1,100 and Edgar and Nelly asked for $1,500 for their labor so I saved a lot of money. The best part is they connected everything with screws instead of nails so the fencing should stay in place for a very long time.

Bill:  Do I know Edgar?

Andy:  He lives seven houses down from us. I figured you knew him as you are my neighbor and you must have seen him and Nellie mowing our yard and trimming out trees all the time. You didn’t know his name and that he is our neighbor? I’ll give you his phone number later.

Bill:  Yes I have seen them doing your lawn and trimming your trees and bushes but I never put it together that they were our neighbors. I know that now and I’m going to have my backyard fence replaced by Edgar and Nellie also.

Andy:  Before you go I need to tell you I received an e-mail from Heritage Property Management which is the company that manages our development for Huntington Landing Homeowners Association. They said over the past few weeks our development, and other housing developments near us, submitted reports to Gwinnett Police that they and their neighbors had their cars broken into and valuable items stolen. But since my neighbor on the other side of my house is one of the Officers of Huntington Landing Homeowners Association she gave me valuable information. Those cars reported to have been broken into were not locked at the time the people took items out of their vehicles. If you leave valuable items in your car but don’t lock your car then you’re also to blame. I just hope if anyone tries to get into our vehicles there would be enough movement to cause the car alarms to go off. Since our driveway is below our bedroom windows we would surely hear it and be able to run the criminals off and prevent a theft. On top of that my wife has surveillance devices facing our driveway from two angles so we would also have it on video to give to Gwinnett Police.

Bill:  That what I’m gonna do to Agostino Romano. I’m going to hear him trying to perpetrate a theft to try to win our match but I’ll stop him and run him off before he can make the steal. Remember to send me Edgar’s phone number so I can call him to install a new backyard fence.

Bill, Bea, and Iris, leave Andy and Rebecca’s yard and return to their home. Once they are in their home the cameraman sets up and Bill launches into his comments for his match against Agostino Romano.

AT THE BARNHART HOME IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

Bill:  Thanks for joining me at our home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. We’ll be flying to San Jose in the morning as that is where Climax Control 308 is being held. At that event I face Agostino Romano in an Internet Championship Tournament match, a Candyland Match, and the winner continues in the Tournament and the loser goes off to do something else. Before I launch into my comments for my match I want to give Bea time to comment on her match against Amber Ryan at Climax Control 307.

Bea:  Thanks Bill. For everyone watching, and especially for Amber Ryan, I want you to go back and look at my performance in that match. I admit I didn’t win, and I congratulate Amber for getting the win, but you need to focus on my performance. Why? You see that in every match I get better and stronger. I’m able to hold my own against anyone in Sin City Wrestling. I continue to perform at my best, and continually improve, and I could have easily walked away from my match with the win and a shot at the Bombshell Championship. But I’ll have to wait until my next opportunity arises. Again, Amber, congratulations on giving me a great match and congratulations on your win. And so everyone is informed ahead of time I’ll be at Bill’s match against Agostino Romano at Climax Control 308 as his Manager to ensure no interference happens to steal his win away from him. Thanks for giving me some of your air time to present my comments.

Bill:  Anything for you Bea. . .except for my coffee and chocolate and especially my chocolate coffee. . .ha ha ha. Now for my comments on my upcoming match against Agostino Romano. It is a Candyland Match where the ring will be made up like a playing board of the game Candyland. This should be a very amusing match and I know I’m gonna win.

Bill points to himself on that comment.

Bill:  Agostino Romano. If not for the fact that you occasionally stumble and actually manage to win a match, and you actually obtained a Championship, you’d be a total loser. But I give you credit that you have accomplished a few things but overall you’re as consistent as a pair of loose pants without a belt to hold them up.  But coming into our match you’re giving up seven inches in height and twenty-five pounds of weight to me. I’m damn sure going to use my height and weight advantage to quickly wear you down, bag you up, and throw you in the trash dumpster and I’ll move on in the Internet Championship Tournament while you return home and lick your wounds.

Barnhart stands up and makes a motion around his waist to show that without a belt to hold up your pants they will slip down to your feet.

Bill:  Agostino we have an amusing match. . .well it’ll be amusing for me but terrifying for you…and it is called a Candyland Match where the ring is made up in the design of a Candyland game board. When I saw what type of match we’re having, and that it was called a Candyland Match, I couldn’t help but look at your pathetic performance in the ring and figure with you involved in this match they could have easily have called this match a CANDY ASS match. Just so nobody takes that comment the wrong way I looked up the term CANDY ASS and the definitions came out as TIMID, SCARED, WEAK, and COWARDLY. Those are perfect descriptions of you Agostino.

Bill busts out in loud laughter before containing himself to continue with his comments.

Bill:  Agostino we’ve had only one match against each other but before you try to brag about what you did in that match please allow me to tell the viewers the truth. The match was at Climax Control 289, on January 10, 2021, and it was a Fatal Four Way where the winner was the wrestler who could slam someone through a table. Do you remember who got slammed through the table for the loss? Was it me? Was it Lincoln Daniels? Was it the other wrestler in that match? Hell no! It was YOU, Agostino, who got slammed through the table by Lincoln Daniels for the loss. Now that the truth is out in the open please do all you can to try to make out the facts of that match to be untrue. Go ahead. . .I dare you!

Bill again busts out in loud laughter but it takes him longer to recover from his laughing and return to commenting.

SOUL MAN. . .BILL MAN. . .

Bill:  I’m going to transition into what I classify as the entertainment, amusement, and informative portion of my comments. First I’ll play for you a well-known song by Sam & Dave titled SOUL MAN. Once you’ve heard the original I’ll give you my version of that song.

Bill clicks on the song, SOUL MAN, on the YouTube page and the original SOUL MAN by Same & Dave begins to play as the lyrics scroll on the screen for the viewers to see.

Comin' to you on a dusty road
Good lovin', I got a truck load
And when ya get it, huh, ya got some
So don't worry, 'cause I'm comin'

I'm a soul man, wow
I'm a soul man
I'm a soul man, woah, heh
I'm a soul man
And that ain't all, huh

Got what I got the hard way
And I'll make it better each and every day
So honey, don't you fret, huh
'Cause you ain't seen uh, nothin' yet

I'm a soul man, oh road
I'm a soul man, play it Steve
I'm a soul man, ha
I'm a soul man, oh

I was brought up on a side street, yes maam
I learned how to love before I could eat
I was educated from good stock
When I start lovin', oh I can't stop

I'm a soul man
I'm a soul man
I'm a soul man, yeah
I'm a soul man, look

Grab a rope and I'll pull you in
Give you hope and be your only boyfriend
Yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah), uh

I'm talking about a
Soul man, I'm a
Soul man, and you
Soul man, aah
Soul man, hold on
Soul man, I'm a
Soul man, and you a
Soul man, and you're a
Soul man, hold on

The original version of SOUL MAN by Sam & Dave ends and Bill comments before presenting his version of the song.

Bill:  You’ve just heard the original SOUL MAN by Sam & Dave and now I present to you my version, which I’ll sing for you, titled BILL MAN.

Coming at you like I’m Dusty Rhodes
Good wrestling. . .I got a truck load
And when you get it, huh, you’re gonna get it
So don't worry, 'cause I'm comin'

I'm the Bill Man. . .wow
I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man. . .woah. . . heh
I'm the Bill Man
And that ain't all. . .huh

Got what I got the hard way
And I make it better each and every day
So y’all, don't you fret. . .huh
'Cause you ain't seen. . .nothin' yet

I'm the Bill Man. . .oh
I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man. . .ha
I'm the Bill Man. . .oh

I was brought up in the wrestling ring
I learned to wrestle before I could sing
I was educated from good stock
When I start wrestling. . .oh I can't stop

I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man. . .yeah
I'm the Bill Man. . .look

Grab a rope and I'll pull you in
Give you hope but I’ll get the win
Yeah. . .yeah. . .yeah. . .yeah. . .uh

I'm talking about a Bill Man. . .
I'm a Bill Man. . .
And you. . .ahhh
You’re not a Bill man. . .ahhh
Bill Man. . .hold on
Bill Man. . .
I'm a Bill Man. . .
You’re not a Bill Man
I'm a Bill Man. . .
You’re not a Bill Man
I’m a Bill Man. . .
You’re not a Bill Man. . .
Hold on!!!

Bill’s version of SOUL MAN titled BILL MAN ends and Bill returns to his comments.

THIS IS HOW IT’S GONNA BE

Bill:  Thanks for enjoying my version of SOUL MAN that I titled BILL MAN. Listen up Agostino. I’m warning you ahead of time what’s gonna happen to you in our match so that way you can’t use the lame excuse that you didn’t know ahead of time. It’s gonna be like this Romano. I’m gonna win. But I’m not just gonna win. I’m gonna hurt you in the process. I’m walking away from our match with a victory to win this first round of the Internet Championship Tournament and you’ll return to your dressing room a defeated pathetic worthless excuse of a wrestler. I know you’ll try to brag about being a two-time Internet Champion but let me set the record straight so the viewers know the truth. Yes you won the Internet Championship on January 31, 2020, then again on March 28, 2021. I give you a little bit of credit for your accomplishment but if you think those two reigns, one for a decent amount of time and one for a short period of time, are something to brag about then you’re more out of your mind than I thought you were. Enjoy living in the past, Romano, because there will be no Internet Championship in your future. See you on Sunday, August 15, 2021, at the Provident Credit Union Event Center in San Jose.

Bill gives the CUT sign and the camera person turns off their camera and the scene ends.


75
Climax Control Archives / I'M GOING TO EARN A SHOT AT THE BOMBSHELL CHAMPIONSHIP
« on: August 04, 2021, 01:01:30 PM »
I’M GOING TO EARN A SHOT AT THE BOMSHELL CHAMPIONSHIP

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart is fired up for her next match at Climax Control 307 against Amber Ryan the current Bombshell Champion. Bea not only goes into this match high on being given the opportunity to defeat Amber and earn a shot at the Bombshell Championship but she has added anger and energy after being called a sexist slur by The Troll during his match with her husband, Bill Barnhart, at Climax Control 306. With my opening comments out of the way I turn you over to Bill and Bea Barnhart but I have no clue where they are at this point in time.

TAKING CARE OF JERKS

When the scene switches we see Bill and Bea Barnhart at the Waterbar Restaurant at 399 The Embarcadero in San Francisco, California. They are sitting in the dining area which is outside the restaurant along the sidewalk.

Bea:  I’m still shocked that The Troll had to resort to landing a low blow on you during your match last week. Then the jerk decided to go off on me because I was calling him out for cheating and letting the Referee know to keep a close watch on him.

Bill:  Yeah the low blows are never nice to be on the receiving end but I’m okay. But I’m not okay with that fat piece of crap, The Troll, screaming out calling you a c*nt. That’s why I ended the match with my favorite submission hold, my Barnhart Shoulder Breaker Flying Hammer Lock. I wanted fat boy to hurt for a long time for what he did to me and for what he called you.

Bill and Bea have their conversation interrupted by a smart ass woman who walks down the sidewalk blasting loud obnoxious music on her cell phone. That wasn’t bad enough but the woman stops and is standing near the outside dining area of the Waterbar Restaurant and her music is so loud and annoying Bill and Bea are unable to hold a conversation.

Bea:  Excuse me! EXCUSE ME!!! EXCUSE ME!!!!! Do you mind either turning down the volume of your music or moving away from our dining area as your music is so loud we cannot hear each other talk.

Obnoxious Woman:  Shut up bitch! This is my music, this is a public street, and I’ll do whatever the hell I want!

Bea:  First The Troll calls me a c*unt and now I’m being called a bitch by an obnoxious bitch of a woman? Damn! Look I’m again asking you nicely to please turn down your music or move away from our location so we can have a peaceful meal and hold a conversation.

Obnoxious Woman:  Who the hell do you think you are?

Bea:  I’m Bea Barnhart, one of the Superstar Wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling and we are performing on Sunday at the Kezar Pavilion here in San Francisco. I suggest you back off because if you come at me and threaten physical violence on me I’ll shove your cell phone so far up your ass the surgeons in the Emergency Room will have a difficult time finding where it is to remove it. What’s it gonna be?

Obnoxious Woman:  Oooooo, the pretty little Asian girl thinks she can take out a woman from San Francisco? Come on bitch c*nt bring it on!

Bea hears the c*nt word and she again gets upset as she did when The Troll used that word on her. Quickly an altercation ensues between the obnoxious woman and Bea and the obnoxious woman challenges Bea to go into the alley to fight it out. We see Bill with a huge smile on his face as he knows what will happen if that obnoxious woman is stupid enough to go into the alley against Bea.

Bea:  Oh, well, I warned you not to do this but you want to do this so let’s do this!

The two women enter the alley and we hear yelling from both of them but the yelling from the obnoxious woman stops quickly. Everyone on the sidewalk, and at the outside dining area of the Waterbar Restaurant, wonder what happened. Then they see movement and they see Bea calmly stroll out of the alley and there is no more comments from the obnoxious woman and her music stopped playing and the other woman is nowhere to be seen.

Bill:  That went quickly. What happened?

Bea:  You saw that I politely asked the woman to turn off her music or move away from us and she threatened me and demanded I go into the alley to fight her. I did exactly what I told her I would do and that was to either shut off her music on her cell phone or shove her cell phone up her ass. Guess which one I decided to do.

Bill:  Shove her cell phone up her ass?

Bea:  Yep. And I even called an ambulance to have her taken to the hospital to have her cell phone surgically removed. Just like I shut this obnoxious woman up you’ll see me shut up Amber Ryan this Sunday.

>* sound of ambulance sirens * An ambulance pulls up to the restaurant and Bea directs them into the alley where the woman with her cell phone up her ass is located. A short time later the Paramedics bring the woman out of the alley on a gurney and load her into the ambulance and drive off. People on the street and other diners at the restaurant cheer Bea for properly defending herself. Bea returns to their table in the outside dining area and Bill and Bea continue with their meal.

Bill:  This location brings back memories of when I grew up and lived in Oakland. The Embarcadero is the first San Francisco station on the BART rapid transit from the East Bay area. The Embarcadero is a great shopping and dining area. Look up there Bea and you see we’re nearly underneath the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge. When you look across San Francisco Bay you see my original home town of Oakland. Let’s enjoy our meal now that we can eat without a lot of noise disturbing us.

Bea:  I’m looking forward to seeing where you grew up in Oakland when we visit there tomorrow.

The scene in San Francisco goes off the screen and the screen goes dark.

THE NEXT DAY IN OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA

Bill and Bea are seen in front of a small house on a small street in Oakland. Bill is pointing to this house.

Bill:  Bea this is the house where I was born and lived until I was nine years old then we moved to a much larger home in the Oakland hills. This house at 4022 Fullington Street is very small. Although the website Zillow lists the house at around 1,400 square feet I can tell you it is not that large. I would estimate they should legally classify this house at around 1,000 square feet. We liked living here, but when the home at 4263 Saint Andrews Road in Oakland became available my father purchased that home and I lived there until I graduated from Skyline High School. I’ll take you there for a look and explain the house to you.

The two drive off in their rental car and arrive at 4263 Saint Andrews Road in Oakland, California, located near the Sequoya Country Club Golf Course.

Bill:  Here we are at 4263 Saint Andrews Road in Oakland where I lived from nine years of age until I turned eighteen and graduated from Skyline High School. Bea although the website Zillow lists this house at 1,700 square feet I assure you this house is nearly 2,000 square feet, has about a one back yard, and it has a full basement with a wet bar also. When we purchased this home it had around twenty fruit trees in the back yard consisting of apricots, peaches, plums, cherries, apples, pears, nectarines, and some others. I felt bad that after I moved out of the house my father became ill and mother decided to sell the home. But the fact that my hard-working parents went from a very small humble home to this one shows that anyone can achieve their dreams.

Bea:  I’m glad you brought me here Bill and I’m glad you explained that anyone can come from a humble beginning and end up on top of the world. That’s how I see my wrestling career and how I see my match on Sunday against Amber Ryan. Even though our match is a non-Title match when I defeat Amber I automatically become next in line for a shot at the Bombshell Championship. Whether she will still have possession of it when I have my Championship match is yet to be seen but regardless who holds the Championship when I challenge for it I'll become the next Bombshell Champion. That’s a true humble beginning to a fantastic here in the present situation for me and my wrestling career.

The two drive off and the scene ends.

IN SAN FRANCISCO AT THEIR HOTEL

The scene comes on our screen and we get a shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart at their hotel room which is located near to Kezar Pavilion. The two look into the camera to make comments.

Bill:  This is your air time Bea. Your time to shine. Your time to tell Amber Ryan what she got herself into having this match with you this Sunday.

Bea:  Thanks Bill. Amber I have several things to get out in the open so just sit down and pay attention. I’d like to start with a comment I heard recently It goes: IT IS FOOLISH TO ADD YEARS TO YOUR LIFE IF YOU DON’T ADD LIFE TO YOUR YEARS. Amber I know you’re looking dumbfounded right now and due to your low mentality you’re having a problem processing the information. Therefore let me enlighten you. You seem to be one of those wrestlers who wants to add years to your life but you you are so lame that you don’t have fun enjoying life. Yeah, okay, you have the Bombshell Championship but you don’t seem to be happy about that or take it seriously. On the other hand I’m thankful that I’ve added tons of experience, “life” if you want to call it that, to my wrestling career. If you’re going to be successful in the sport of wrestling then you should be happy when you achieve things. You never seem to be happy about anything Amber. You always come across as if you just ate a dozen sour lemons. That’s a pathetic way to live your life but you have to choose what you do in your life and your choices are not ones that I would make.

Bea take a sip of water.

Bea:  I have another saying I wish to present to you Amber. It goes like this. DON’T HATE SOMETHING YOU LIKE JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE YOU HAVE ALSO LIKES THAT SAME THING. Again, due to your limited mental capacity, I’ll try to explain this saying in simple terms so that you’ll be able to understand. I have a friend who constantly tells me the reason they hate a certain type of music, or a certain musical group, or certain type of food, etc., that they hate a person who also likes those items. Now wait a minute! They loved those items until she found out someone they know, but doesn’t like, also likes the same things. I’ll never back down and stop liking something just because someone I don’t like also likes what I like. Nobody should just blindly hate something just because someone else also likes it. You need to stand up for what you believe in whether it is music, movies, cars, clothing, or food items. You see, Amber, that’s the difference between me and you. I cherish everything and I work hard to accomplish my goals. If someone I know, whether in personal life or inside the wrestling business, likes the same things I do, but I don’t like that person, it would be stupid for me to start hating those things just because someone I don’t like also likes them. To try to put that in the simplest terms it comes down to the fact that I don’t choose to like or dislike something just because others who I don’t like also like or dislike those items. In my personal life, and my wrestling career, I’m going to do  what I need to do to be successful. When I defeat you on Sunday, even though it is a non-Title match, the fact that I defeated you means I go to the top of the ladder to challenge for the Bombshell Championship. That’s a goal I set my eyes on and that’s the goal I’ll achieve this Sunday.

DON’T TAKE ME LIGHTLY

Bea:  Here’s the bottom line Amber. Since I arrived in Sin City Wrestling we have not had a match against each other. This is our first match to face each other and I know your ego is telling you that you’ll achieve an easy win over me. Oh, please, don’t be that foolish! Just because you have not yet faced me in the ring doesn’t mean you know everything about me and it doesn’t mean you are more talented than I am. When you step into the ring Sunday evening you step into the ring as the Bombshell Champion and we are basically even in height and weight. When the match is over and my hand is raised in victory over you of course you will still be the Bombshell Champion but you’ll have to face your loss to me. Don’t take me lightly.

The broadcast ends with that last comment by Bea and the screen goes black.


76
Climax Control Archives / I'M GOING TO SHRED THE TROLL
« on: July 28, 2021, 10:24:11 AM »
I’M GOING TO SHRED THE TROLL

Narrator:  The Troll? Bill Barnhart has to face The Troll to open Climax Control 305? Seriously? Ha ha ha ha ha! This is going to be one of the quickest wins for Bill Barnhart in his wrestling career.

VISITING A FRIEND IN SAN DIEGO

The scene shifts to a home where we see Bill and Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, relaxing at the home of Bill’s friend Marcus who lives in Imperial Beach, California, which is just South of San Diego along the border with Mexico and about 150 miles South of Los Angeles. We listen in on their conversation.

Bill:  Marcus I thank you for inviting us to San Diego when you heard we were going to have one of our wrestling events in Los Angeles. I have two tickets for you and a friend to come watch me wrestle at Climax Control 306 which will be on August 1, 2021.

Marcus:  Thanks Bill. I’ve been watching you and Bea wrestle and I’m hoping both of you earn another Championship soon. I see Bea earning the Bombshell Roulette Championship and I hope to see you get into the mix for the vacated Internet Championship.

Bill:  Whatever comes our way Marcus. Also I’m glad that Iris is getting along with your dog Jake. The two are having fun playing in the backyard.

Marcus:  Jake loves everyone but I know Iris loves food first before other things. By the way have you been assigned an opponent for Climax Control 306?

Bill:  Yeah they assigned me to face off against the company Jobber. That term means the person gets paid to lose. Damn shame since I’ve spent my entire career facing the toughest opponents as I don’t want a win handed to me but I have to accept my assignment.

Marcus:  The Troll? Seriously? What’s up with that guy?

Bill:  I would equate him as a cross between Patrick Star, Michael Moore, and Jabba The Hutt. He’s a fat slob at five feet eight inches and two hundred fifty-two pounds and his face looks like Michael Moore and makes you want to puke.

Marcus:  Sounds like the guy got some defective genes from his parents. I know you’re originally from Oakland, California, as we went to school together there, and now you’re in Atlanta, Georgia, but where is this guy The Troll from?

Bill:  I guess he doesn’t want anyone to know where he lives because his information sheet filed with the Federation just says “Parts Unknown most likely his Mother’s basement.”

Bill and Marcus bust out in loud laughter over that information and Bea walks into the room to find out what these two find so amusing.

Bea: What’s so amusing guys?

Bill:  My opponent, The Troll, for Climax Control 306.

Bea:  Yes he’s quite an amusing, and downright pathetic, wrestler. Speaking of being amusing can I tell you two a few jokes before I leave you two alone?

Bill and Marcus say they want to hear Bea’s jokes.

Bea:  What do you call it when two Doctors are performing surgery on the same patient at the same time? Co-operating.

What do you call a blood-sucking insect that is made out of wood?  A Mesquite-O

What would you call a man who has a fake penis made out of a tree?  Woodpecker

Bill and Marcus enjoy the jokes and laugh. Bea goes into the backyard to play with Iris and Jake. The camera remains on Marcus and Bill for a short time before the camera feed is cut and the screen goes black.

SOME TIME LATER IN LOS ANGELES

SHREDDER

We open with a scene of Bill and Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, in their hotel room at a hotel near the Galen Center in Los Angeles, California. We see Bill sitting at the dining table with a pile of papers on the table and a document shredder on the floor in front of him. Bea walks up and sees the paper and the shredder.

Bea:  Did you bring paperwork and our shredder from Lawrenceville, Georgia, to Los Angeles? Why?

Bill:  We haven’t been able to travel much until now so I decided to catch up on shredding documents.

Bea:  You could have waited until we got home for a decent amount of time but I guess because we launched into the West Coast Tour better to bring the paperwork with us to shred. By the way what documents are you shredding?

Bill:  I’m shredding documents that o longer serve a purpose and they are now useless. To use an analogy I’ll be shredding The Troll in my match at Climax Control 306 as he also serves no purpose and is useless.

Bea:  Since I’m in your corner as your Manager, and there’s rumors going around that Bobbie Dahl might run in on the match to mess with The Troll, I’m in your corner to make sure no interference happens. If Bobbie does manage to distract The Troll and he loses the match the Referee is likely to blame us when we’re innocent of any wrong doing. Rest assured Bobbie and The Troll are not going to get away with cheating you out of a win. Before I go take care of some things I want to make it clear to everyone watching that my performance in the Ultimate X Over The Pool match at Summer XXXTreme IX was great and even though I didn’t win I’ll be back after the Roulette Championship soon. I’ll have no mercy for any wrestlers standing in my way. You have been warned.

Bea walks off to take care of stuff and Bill starts shredding documents. The sound of the shredder cutting up the papers is soothing.

Bill:  Hey, Troll, this is what I’m going to do to you at our match at Climax Control 306. I’m the shredder and you’re this fat pile of now useless papers. I’m not taking you seriously as you’re the joke of the year. I’ll flatten your fat ass so quickly you’ll lose twenty pounds in the process. Remember I’m a street smart person who was born and grew up in Oakland, California, and then in 2012 me and Bea moved to the Atlanta Metro area in Georgia. So I transitioned from an ass kicking street smart kid from Oakland to an ass kicking street smart redneck guy from Atlanta, Georgia.

Bea:  But an intelligent cute and handsome street smart redneck buy from Atlanta.

Bill and Bea enjoy a laugh over that comment.

Bill:  Everyone will watch me work my magic this Sunday. Everyone will watch me quickly destroy The Blob this Sunday. Enjoy your free time now Troll because after I get done beating you down you’ll be so busy dressing your wounds and taking heavy medication for your pain that you will not enjoy your time.

Bill motions to the camera person to cut the camera feed and they do and our screen goes black.


77
Climax Control Archives / ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP HERE I COME
« on: June 16, 2021, 05:07:56 PM »
ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP HERE I COME

Narrator:  Here we are again with Bea Barnhart in a Roulette Championship Qualifier match to earn a spot in the Roulette Championship Ultimate X Over The Pool Match at Summer XXXTtreme IX. Bea is no stranger to Roulette Rules matches and she previously had a shot at the Roulette Championship but came up short on that evening so she wants to win this match, face the others in the Ultimate X Over The Pool Match at Summer XXXTreme IX, and redeem herself. That’s all I want to say to lead into Bea’s comments on her match at Climax Control 303. I now turn you over to Bea for her to give you the information you are anxious to hear.

When the scene switches we see Bea Barnhart relaxing in their hotel room. Bill and their English Bulldog Iris are walking around but trying to stay out of camera view as best they can. Bea is sitting at the dining table facing the camera. Bea is dressed in her trademark wrestling attire and she definitely looks ready to kick ass at Climax Control 303. When the camera person informs Bea they are live broadcasting Bea begins her presentation.

Bea:  Hi and welcome to another edition of you all shut the hell up and listen to me talk. I’m here to present reasons why I’m walking away from this match to challenge for the Roulette Championship at Summer XXXTreme IX in an Ultimate X Over The Pool match. The first thing I wish to get out of the way is that I’m no stranger to Roulette Rules matches and that I’ve come a long way since a year ago and it will show in my performance at this Sunday.

Bea takes a break to sip some water before continuing.

Bea:  My first Roulette Rules match was on February 16, 2020, at My Bloody Valentine III. I soundly defeated Violet Amelia Holt in a Fans Bring The Weapons match to earn the Number One Contender spot for the Bombshell Roulette Championship. My second Roulette Rules match was on April 12, 2020, at Blaze of Glory VIII was a Ladder Match for the Roulette Championship and I came up a little short that evening and didn’t earn the Roulette Championship. My third Roulette Rules match was on September 13, 2020, at Climax Control 280. It was a Triple Threat for a chance to face Seleana Zdunich at Violent Conduct VI for the Roulette Championship. I lost that match but I gave a hell of a fight.

Bea breaks again to drink more water then she continues.

Bea:  I imagine the majority of you watching are screaming at your television sets but I’m unable to hear what you’re saying so you waste your energy. You know what I mean. Wasting energy like Candy and Char Kwan will be wasting their energy trying to defeat me in our match. I imagine you’re asking how I’m so confident and feel I’m qualified to challenge for the Roulette Championship when I’m 1-2 in Roulette Rules matches and 0-1 in Roulette Championship matches. That’s a good question and I have a good answer. Back during the times of those matches I was new to the sport of wrestling as it pertains to being a wrestler inside the ring instead of being the Manager in Bill’s corner. To come away with one win in three matches AND to have earned a shot at the Roulette Champion tells you a lot of what I was able to accomplish as a rookie in the sport of wrestling. Now that I’ve been in the ring as a wrestler for seventeen months my experience and abilities continue to grow. Taking out Char Kwan and Candy will be easier than those of you watching are willing to give me credit for being able to accomplish. Promise me that you will not blink your eyes during my match because I’ll defeat Char and Candy so quickly you might miss my win when you blink.

MY OPPONENTS

Bea:  My two opponents in this Roulette Championship Qualifier match are Candy and Char Kwan. I mentioned that I lost the Roulette Championship match against Candy a long time ago. I look at it that if Candy was such a Great Roulette Champion she would still be Roulette Champion but she’s not. Seeing that she lost the Roulette Championship shows she’s vulnerable and even more so going up against me now that I’m seasoned and more than ready and determined to whup ass. As for Char Kwan I have no history with her but I know enough about her to know she is way down on the talent ladder, in the basement if you will, and she’ll not be any more annoying than a fly that hovers over a pile of shit. I’ll swat Char out of the way and zap her like I’m a bug zapper. This match literally comes down to me and Candy and I’m walking away with my shot at the Roulette Championship at Summer XXXTreme IX.

ELEMENTS

Bea:  Candy. . .Char. . .you’re probably aware of the Periodic Table that lists all the Elements by their names and Atomic numbers. Well I guess you might be aware of it but I’m not sure either of you were able to take in major concepts like that during your school years as you two continue to prove you are mentally deficient and are unable to comprehend even the simplest things. If you two do happen to know what the Periodic Table is then you know that the Atomic Numbers of all the elements listed runs from 1 which is Hydrogen and it goes up from there. Oh man I’m sorry I have to use such big complicated words and concepts that confuse the two of you but that’s honestly how the Periodic Table is set up. I’m sure both of your heads are hurting from trying to grasp simple concepts but if you think I give a shit that your heads hurt you’re wrong. Rest assured after I beat both of you down in our match your heads will hurt for a long time after the match is over.

Bea holds up a copy of the Periodic Table for the camera to get a shot of.

Bea:  I want you two to know that I’m having this Periodic Table modified to include a new entry that depicts you two perfectly. The Atomic Number of the new element will be 0 or if you are having a hard time comprehending numbers it would be Z. . .E. . .R. . .O  because you two are ZERO compared to me. The name of the new Element reflects you two by being called MORONIUM letting everyone know you two are morons. Yes you two can rest assured that for added impact your faces will be placed on the new entry so everyone can see what you two MORONIUMS look like.

Bea lets out a very loud laugh that causes Bill and Iris to stop what they are doing and they look over at her. When they realize she’s laughing at comments she made to Candy and Char, and that they might be in the range of the camera, they return to what they were doing.

TO INFINITY AND BEYOND

Bea:  My friend is a Math teacher at Sweetwater Middle School in Lawrenceville, Georgia. She complains about Disney for having Buzz Lightyear having his signature statement as TO INFINITY AND BEYOND! Why? She asks HOW COULD DISNEY COME UP WITH A LAME SIGNATURE STATEMENT AS THAT FOR BUZZ LIGHTYEAR? INFINITY IS FOREVER THEREFORE YOU CANNOT MAKE STATEMENT LIKE TO INFINITY AND BEYOND AS THERE’S NOTHING BEYOND INFINITY!  Well that damn sure makes sense unless you are morons like Candy and Char. When I defeat you two to earn my shot at the Bombshell Roulette Championship at Summer XXXTreme IX you’ll watch me soar off into glory when I win the Bombshell Roulette Championship and successfully defend it for a very long time. Now, come on Char, come on Candy, both of you claim you are infinite and will destroy everyone in your way but you have failed constantly and you will fail again at Climax Control 303.

Bea snarls into the camera.

SLOW PROGRESS IS BETTER THAN NO PROGRESS

Bea:  I’ve had to listen to seventeen months of the rest of the roster making fun of me as I haven’t made as much progress as others on the roster have done. But I have a saying for what I’m accomplishing. That saying is SLOW PROGRESS IS BETTER THAN NO PROGRESS and I’m fully satisfied that I continue to make progress, move ahead, and have Management assign me to Championship matches or Championship Qualifier matches. Maybe two morons like you can’t see my progress but Management does and since Management pays my salary I’ll listen to them instead of listening to you two idiots. There have been many in Sin City Wrestling who came into the Federation and immediately won a few matches then failed after that. In my case, since I was a green rookie, I lost a few matches then quickly won a Roulette Championship Qualifier match. So what do you feel is a better thing to have? To win several matches early in your careers then crash and burn after the initial success or to slowly win matches and then you start getting sent into matches to challenge for Championships? Slow and steady is the key and slow progress is better than no progress.

Bea smiles into the camera.

YOU GET WHAT YOU EARN

Bea:  Before I close my comments concerning my match I wish to tell you about our neighbors in Lawrenceville, Georgia, Andrew and Rebecca. What I have to tell you concerns Rebecca who is an IT Tech for more than twenty years. When they moved to Georgia in 2012 she had several jobs that sucked to put it nicely. They didn’t pay well and they treated her like crap. Then she got a job at a Medical Testing company that franchises locations across the United States. She has been there since January 2014 so she is now five months into her seventh year. They rarely gave her good pay increases and never gave great performance evaluations even though she is one of their best employees. But Rebecca plugged along, accepting slow progress from her employers over no progress at all, and today she called me with great news on how her performance, qualifications, and skills, earned her something she wasn’t expecting. Rebecca said several weeks ago she started working with an Executive Recruiting firm and the woman she worked with, Natalie, put her name in for an Implementation Manager at one of the largest and most successful companies in the United States and all around the world. It is a work from home position and after several interviews, then a final interview with three Executives from the company she would be working for, Natalie called her and said the company she interviewed for is offering her $52 per hour for $110,000 per year. Wow! At her current company, after seven years working there she is currently at $58,000 so that means the new company is offering her nearly double what her current job is paying her after working for them for seven years. Do you see how the concept of slow progress is better than no progress works? Rebecca kept at her work, as she is the best IT person they have, and finally she got a fantastic job offer for close to double her current salary. Why did I tell you this story? Because you all treat me like I don’t deserve anything and yet I prove consistently that I earn what I get. That’s why I got this Triple Threat match to earn my way into the Roulette Championship match at Summer XXXTreme IX. Slow progress is better than no progress. I understand that concept. Vinnie understands that concept. Iris understands that concept. And most of the fans understand that concept.  But I cannot expect Miss Dumb and Miss Dumber, my two opponents, to understand that concept. When I defeat you two, and you two get to stay at home and watch Summer XXXTreme IX instead of being assigned to a match for that event, or worse yet they get assigned to a low card match at Summer XXXTreme IX just to fill space, they’ll finally get it.

Bea points to herself while starting her closing comments.

Bea: Char you should not be in this match and you’ll not fare well. Candy you will fare better than Char will but you’ll still be defeated by me. Say what you want. Hurl all the slurs and insults my direction if you want. Brag about yourselves if you want. I’ve had my say and I’ll back up what I’ve said. See you two at Climax Control 303.

Bea informs the camera person she’s done with her comments and they call into the Network to let them know they are cutting their camera feed. The camera person is so quick on cutting the camera feed the screen goes dark and it takes the Network nearly a minute to get regular programming broadcasting again.


78
Climax Control Archives / NO JOKING
« on: June 10, 2021, 11:24:32 AM »
NO JOKING OR JESTING. . .JUST SERIOUS ASS KICKING

Narrator:  King For The Day Vinnie has assigned Bill Barnhart and Austin James Mercer to a Royal Court Jester Match. King Vinnie placed the rules of this match that in order to win the match you must totally remove the Jester outfit your opponent is wearing. There’s no doubt in my mind that Bill Barnhart will be the one to rip the Jester outfit off Austin James Mercer for the win. I just hope Bill doesn’t end up taking too much off of Mercer or there may be some censoring in order by the Network.

The scene changes and we are taken to the dressing room area that Bill Barnhart is using during Climax Control 302. The camera gets a shot of Bill and we see he dressed in his Court Jester outfit, complete with a felt hat that has bells on the ends of the rim so it rings when he moves around, and he has a very elaborate Jester Scepter which he is holding in his hand. Bill walks around for a bit before taking a seat on the couch and laying the Jester Scepter next to him. Bill looks into the camera to give his presentation leading up to his Court Jester match against Austin James Mercer.

Bill:  Thanks for joining me. As you can see Bea and Iris are not here in the dressing room area with me. Iris isn’t here because I don’t want Management to get upset with me having her in the venue. They did, however, give me permission so that Iris can join me if I have a meet the fans thing going on but only for a short time and only in the backstage area. As for Bea she has a bit of a headache so she decided to stay in our hotel room and relax to help make the headache go away.

Bill pauses his comments to take a bite out of the slice of pepperoni pizza he has on a plate on the coffee table. He then picks up a can of Classic Coke, pops the top, and downs the entire can of Classic Coke. The carbonation, of course, does have an effect.

Bill:  Buuuuurrrrrppppp!!!!!  Oops! Excuse me! Too much carbonation at one time. Before I jump into comments for my Court Jester match with Austin James Mercer I’d like to get a few things that need to be put out there for public scrutiny out of the way.

Bill again pauses to eat some of his pepperoni pizza but this time he doesn’t drink Classic Coke so that he won’t be likely to burp loudly on television again.

Bill:  Well, Austin, things didn’t go as me and Bea thought they would. That’s how things work in the sport of wrestling. Things can change quickly in a match and the wrestlers need to accept how it went. Bea took a hard shot from Tempest on the outside of the ring and that allowed Tempest to pin Bea for the win. The bottom line is we accept the decision in the match and move on to the next match. Austin I’m truly amused because just when you thought you two winning the Mixed Tag Team Championship would get you away from me, so you wouldn’t have to deal with me again for a very long time, Vinnie, serving as King For The Day, assigned you to face me in a Royal Court Jester Match. The rules are simple. Both wrestlers have to wear a Court Jester outfit and the winner is the wrestler who can completely remove the Jester outfit their opponent is wearing. This will be easy for me to accomplish. I also thank King Vinnie for this match because the Mixed Tag Team Championship match was won when Tempest pinned Bea therefore you and I have unfinished business between us that I’ll take care of in our Court Jester match.

Barnhart again pauses and this time he finishes off the pepperoni pizza slice and again he doesn’t take a drink of Classic Coke so he won’t burp on camera again.

A JESTER’S RESPONSIBILITIES

Bill:  Austin although in a Kingdom the person serving as Court Jester has responsibilities to tell jokes, perform tricks, and make people laugh, that’s not what I’m in this match for. There will be no joking. There will be no jesting. There will be no tricks performed. I’m coming into this match to quickly rip the Court Jester outfit off of you for the victory. Since the Mixed Tag Team Championship match didn’t turn out the way my team wanted it to I accept the Referee’s decision on the match and move forward. However, Austin, you noticed that when the two of us were in the ring you were powerless against me. I was the Kryptonite to your thoughts that you are Superman. You were unable to pin me or apply an effective submission hold. I had you beat many times in that match but you somehow managed to tag Tempest back into the ring. Also the fact that you two had to resort to taking the match outside the ring numerous times, and our Referee failed to reprimand you two for violating the rules, disappoints me. However, Austin, I’m not like you where I lose a match and then whine, bitch, moan, and cry about the loss. Bea got taken out and Tempest got the pinfall on her and I congratulate you two on defeating us for the Championship. Of course we wanted to hold the Mixed Tag Team Championship longer than a week but stuff happens and we accept that. There will be more Championships coming our way but I’m not going to focus on what may or may not come our way down the line. I’m here to focus on humiliating you when I rip your Jester outfit off for the win. I assure you that you have nowhere to run and nowhere to hide from the beat down I’m going to give you.

Barnhart smiles into the camera before continuing with his comments.

TWO WAYS OF LOOKING AT AUSTIN JAMES MERCER

Bill:  I’d like to run a short video showing two ways of looking at things and both of the way of looking at things portray you very well on how people should be looking at you.

The video begins to pay and we see three men walking down the street. The three stop when they see something on the sidewalk that, to us anyway, appears to be a pile of dog shit. Instead of simply walking around the dog shit they stop and start discussing with each other what this item could be, and the ways they can determine what the item is, then we see and hear the following.

First Man:  *squats down and picks up the dog shit with his hand* Well this thing sure feels like shit. *the man replaces the dog shit on the sidewalk then he stands up next to the other two men*

Second Man:  *squats down and places his face near the dog shit and takes a deep breath through his nose* Well it certainly smell like shit. *the second man stands up and joins the other two men*

Third Man:  *squats down and picks up the dog shit, brings his hand to his mouth, and places the dog shit into his mouth. He gags and nearly pukes when he tastes the foul taste of the dog shit* Well this thing really does taste like dog shit. So since it feels like shit, smells like shit, and tastes like shit, it damn sure must be shit. Sure glad we didn’t step in it. *he then stands up and joins the other two men*

The three men take off down the sidewalk satisfied they solved the mystery of what the item was on the sidewalk and even more proud of themselves for not accidentally stepping in the dog shit.

The video ends and we return to a shot of Bill Barnhart.

WHAT IS THE BOTTOM LINE?

Bill:  Austin I told you I’d show you a video and explain the references pertaining to you. The first reference is that you’re as worthless as a pile of dog shit on the sidewalk. The second reference is that you’re like those three men. Any intelligent person would have immediately recognized the item on the sidewalk as a pile of dog shit and they would have simply walked around it. But, no, the three idiots in the video had to touch it, smell it, and taste it, to confirm that it was, in fact, dog shit, and only after they defiled themselves did they decide to walk around the dog shit and continue on their way. That’s a perfect depiction of you Austin. You’re about as useless and disgusting as a pile of dog shit. You’re also a non-logical person who cannot think things through intelligently so you have to defile yourself first, like the three men in the video did, before you’re able to understand what is going on.

Bill decides to open another can of Classic Coke and he again downs the entire thing.

Bill:  Buuuuurrrrrppppp!!!!!  Oh, yeah, that felt good and defeating you Austin will feel even better! So, Austin, what’s the bottom line concerning our match? The simple definition is that I win and you lose but I want to take it further than that. When I quickly, and soundly, defeat you, half your fans will defect from you and come over to support me. When I quickly, and soundly defeat you, Management will send you back to the bottom of the Roster for you to work hard and earn your way back into contention for Championships. And don’t even try to state that you earned a shot at the Mixed Tag Team Championship because you didn’t earn a damn thing! That shot at the Mixed Tag Team Championship was handed to you by the Queen For The Day and both you and Tempest did nothing but complain about being handed that Title shot. In our Royal Court Jester match you can’t rely on Tempest to drag Bea to the outside of the ring, in violation of the rules, and attack her to beat her down for the win over me. No, Austin, there’s none of that crap in our match. It’s just you and me and I’ll absolutely, positively, overwhelmingly, without a doubt, defeat you so soundly that you may even leave the the sport of wrestling and go into retirement to avoid further humiliation. Thanks to those who tuned in to listen to my comments.

When the camera person hears Bill’s closing line he calls into the Network to inform them that his job airing Bill’s comments is finished. The Network cuts the feed and our screen goes dark for a short time before the Network puts up some commercials.


79
Climax Control Archives / OUR OPPONENTS DIDN'T EARN THEIR TITLE SHOT
« on: June 03, 2021, 09:04:53 AM »
AUSTIN JAMES MERCER AND TEMPEST DID NOT EARN THIS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH

Narrator:  Isn’t it pathetic that two wrestlers who didn’t do a damn thing to earn a shot at the Mixed Tax Team Championship, held by Bill and Bea  Barnhart, get a shot handed to them by Alicia Lucas who won her Queen For The Day match at Into The Void X? I could say a hell of a lot more but it is much more fun to have Bill Barnhart lay it out for you.

BILL AND BEA VISIT A STAND-UP COMEDY CLUB TO WATCH THEIR FRIEND PERFORM

The scene shifts to the Laugh Factory in Las Vegas. The venue is packed with people excited to watch people perform their stand-up comedy routines since tonight is Amateur Night which means no professional comedians are allowed to perform. We get a shot of Bill and Bea who have front-row seats as they here to watch their friend, Andrew, from Lawrenceville, Georgia, perform his stand-up comedy routine. The Emcee walks to the mic to introduce the first performer.

Emcee:  Thank you for coming to the Laugh Factory for our Amateur Night where only amateur comedians are allowed to perform. After all performers have presented their routines you in the audience will determine the winner by your applause and cheering. Our first performer comes all the way from Lawrenceville, Georgia, please give a warm welcome to Andrew Eide!

The Emcee walks off the stage while Andrew Eide comes out from behind the side curtain and walks to the mic.

Andrew:  Before I launch into my stand-up comedy routine I wish to acknowledge two persons in the audience. They are my neighbors in Lawrenceville, Georgia, and I came to Las Vegas to watch them defend their Mixed Tag Team Championship against the pathetic team of Austin James Mercer and Tempest. . .

* audience interrupts Andrew with overwhelming loud laughter *

Andrew:  Oh my! I can’t believe the outstanding laughter I got from the audience just from mentioning the names of the opponents for Bill and Bea in their match. I hope I can get half that amount of laughter from the audience with my comedy routine. Before I start my act I present to you Bill and Bea Barnhart! Please stand up and take bow.

Bill and Bea stand up and acknowledge the audience then they return to their seats and Andrew launches into his stand-up comedy routine.

Andrew:  Hi! My name is Andrew. Up until I was 10 years old I thought my name was DUMAS. You see, my Dad would call me:  HEY, DUMB ASS! COME HERE!!! I just thought he was pronouncing my name wrong!

* laughter from audience *

Andrew:  So my name is Andrew and my last name is Eide which is spelled E-I-D-E but it is pronounced like IDE. Most people see the spelling on my last name and they pronounce it as EDIE or EDDIE. So someone will call out EDIE. .  EDIE. . .and I start looking around for Steve Lawrence.

* the audience appears confused *

Andrew:  Apparently you being such a young audience you don’t remember the husband and wife singing duo of Steve Lawrence and Edie Gorme. Oh well…now I’d like to talk about my friend’s mother and father. For instance my friend’s mother is so fat.

* audience replies with HOW FAT IS SHE? *

Andrew:  My friend’s mother is so fat one day she wore a white dress and fifty cars parked in front of her because they thought they were at a drive-in movie!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  On another day my friend’s mother wore a green dress with white stripes on it and people thought she was a football field!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  Okay…Okay! I see the looks from the women in the audience. I don’t want you to think I’m disrespecting women so let me talk about my friend’s father. You see my friend’s father is so old.

* audience replies with HOW OLD IS HE? *

Andrew:  My friend’s father is so old when Archeologist found the Hieroglyphs they found his picture painted on the walls!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  He is so old that Methuselah calls him Pops!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  You know in the Bible where it says GOD SAID LET THERE BE LIGHT…AND THERE WAS LIGHT? The next thing heard was my friend’s father yelling out: HEY! TURN OUT THAT LIGHT! I’M SLEEPING HERE! Now that’s old!

* loud laughter from audience *

Andrew:  I want to return to my friend’s mother since I forgot to tell you that she is also ugly.

* audience replies with HOW UGLY IS SHE?

Andrew:  My friend’s mother is so ugly that they use her as a model for Gargoyles!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  She is so ugly that the Phantom of the Opera walked up to her, took off his mask, and handed it to her saying HERE, TAKE MY MASK, YOU NEED IT MORE THAN I DO!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  My friend’s mother is so ugly that when the Elephant Man saw her he screamed in horror!

* louder laughter from the audience *

Andrew:  She came over my house once and scared the fur off my cat!!!

* loud laughter from the audience *

Andrew:  Let me change the subject to language okay? My friend tried to teach me a little bit of Spanish the other day. I have to be honest with you that I have enough trouble with English but I listened to my friend anyway. For example my friend told me that AQUI means HERE. AQUI means HERE. Hmmm…I thought A KEY was something you put into a door to unlock the lock!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  Then my friend told me that QUE means WHAT in Spanish. QUE means WHAT. I thought K was the eleventh letter of the alphabet.

* Andrew waits to see see if audience counts the letters of the alphabet to the letter K on their fingers *

Andrew:  I see you counting the letters on your fingers. A – B – C – D – E – F – G – H – I – J – K and then looking at each other and saying GEE, K IS THE ELEVENTH LETTER OF THE ALPHABET! I told you so! I wouldn’t lie to you!

* loud laughter from the audience *

Andrew:  Finally my friend told me the most confusing word of all. They said PORQUE means BECAUSE. PORQUE means BECAUSE? Oh come on now! EVERYONE knows that PORKY is a cartoon pig!!!

* very loud laughter from the audience *

At the last great response by the audience Andrew closes his stand-up comedy routine.

Andrew:  Thank you! Thank you very much! Remember my name is DUMAS. . .I mean Andrew. . .and you’ve been a fantastic audience! Thank you!!!

The Emcee walks up on the stage and Andrew hands the mic to him then exits into the backstage area. Our attention is turned to Bill and Bea Barnhart.

Bill:  That was a great stand-up comedy routine from Andrew. Too bad we can’t stay for the entire Amateur Night Competition as we have to get to the studio to finish airing our comments for our match at Climax Control 301.

Bea:  Even if Andrew doesn’t win the Amateur Night Competition I’m sure he’ll come out in the top three.

Bea and Bill stand up from their table and leave the Laugh Factory. The scene ends when they exit the venue.

A SHORT TIME LATER IN THE BROADCAST STUDIO

The scene returns and we get a shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart in the temporary broadcast studio which has been set up in Earl Wilson Stadium. Both are casually dressed in matching blue jeans and pink pullover shirts. The two are sitting at a large wooden desk like you would see two news anchors doing when they deliver the news.

AFTER A BREAK FOR LAUGHTER IT IS TIME TO GET SERIOUS

Bill:  I’ll start our comments for this presentation. Austin James Mercer eh? The man who proclaims he’s the best in the world and yet you’ve had your ass handed to you so often it has become the normal expectation in your matches. Get upset at my comments if you want as I honestly don’t give a damn what you think or how you feel. Although we’ve had only one match against each other, and that was at Into The Void IX on June 7, 2020, and you got the win, that win by you was a fluke. In our upcoming Mixed Tag Team Championship match I’ll humiliate you to the world when I defeat you and prove your previous win was a joke and shouldn’t have happened. Austin do you want to prove to the world that you are not a one-hit wonder in your previous win? If so then bring it on and prove it to the world by defeating me in our upcoming match. I dare you to try. . .but I damn sure will enjoy watching you lose to me.

THE TORTOISE AND THE HARE

Bill:  Hey, Austin, do you remember the story of The Tortoise and the Hare? The Tortoise who was slow and steady ended up winning the race while the Hare was over-confident and foolish. That’s how it is in the sport of wrestling. But before I go into that let me tell you about my best friend in High School at Skyline High School in Oakland, California. His name was Grant Mori, and he was Japanese, and he had endurance beyond what everyone else had. When we ran the one mile race on the school track Grant would go slow and steady while everyone else went quickly to start. They all quickly got tired and had to slow down while Grant kept up his pace. He rarely failed to come in first in his races. In fact in one of the one mile events one of Grant’s shoes came untied so he stopped on the track to tie his shoe. It took grant more than thirty seconds to tie his shoe but he got it tied, stood up, and still ended up winning the race. That’s how me and Bea work. Determined but slow and steady. You make less mistakes when you take your time to do things properly. And, Austin and Tempest, did you see how anxious and foolish Kate and Teddy were to the point where they did high risk moves only to have Bea lay Kate out for the win? If you two want to make high risk maneuvers which have a low percentage for success, then please feel free to do so but I ask you to talk with Teddy and Kate first before you make that decision otherwise you’ll have nobody to blame but yourselves.

ONE LAST COMPARISON

Bill:  I’ve never thought about myself in my wrestling career in a certain way until Bea came to me and mentioned how she sees me. I will let her explain it to you and then allow her to present her parody.

Bea:  Since the day I met Bill I’ve looked to him like Lois Lane looked up to Superman. Let me read to you the original opening dialogue of the Superman television program.

Bea picks up a sheet of paper and begins reading the original opening dialogue to the Superman television program.

Bea:  Faster than a speeding bullet.
More powerful than a locomotive.
Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
Look! Up in the sky!
It’s a bird. It’s a plane. It’s Superman!
Yes, it’s Superman. Strange visitor from another planet who came to Earth with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men. Superman who can change the course of mighty rivers, bend steel with his bare hands, and who, disguised as Clark Kent, mild mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper, fights the never ending battle for Truth, Justice and the American Way.

Bea looks up from the paper that she just read from presenting the original opening dialogue to the Superman television program.

Bea:  Now I will present the modified version I made to represent Bill as compared to Superman.

Bea picks up the second sheet of paper and begins reading her modified version of the original opening dialogue to the Superman television program.

Bea:  Faster than a speeding bullet.
More powerful than a locomotive.
Able to leap tall obstacles in a single bound.
Look! Up in the wrestling ring!
It’s a bird. It’s a plane. It’s Super Bill!
Yes, it’s Super Bill originally from Oakland, California, and now lives in Lawrenceville, Georgia, who came to Sin City Wrestling with powers and abilities far beyond those of normal wrestlers. Super Bill who can change the course of mighty rivers, bend steel with his bare hands, and who fights the never ending battle for Truth, Justice and the American Way.

>Bea puts the second sheet of paper down on the top of the desk then she stares into the camera.

Bea:  That’s how I see Bill. That’s how the majority of fans see Bill. After our decisive win over Austin James Mercer and Tempest at Climax Control 301 all the fans will see Bill as their Superman as I do.

Bill:  Thanks for the kind words and presenting me in a unique way to the fans and other wrestlers. I see you as my Lois Lane to you seeing me as your Superman. We make a hell of a great wrestling combination and that will be proven beyond a doubt this Sunday. Thanks to the viewers for joining us today. Tune in on Sunday, June 6, 2021, for Climax Control 301, where we destroy the dreams and careers of two pathetic opponents.

Bill and Bea do a HIGH FIVE then they both look toward the camera person and give the CUT sign and the camera person cuts their camera feed and our screen goes black. It takes the Network about 10 seconds to get regularly scheduled programming back on the screen.


80
Climax Control Archives / QUEEN ON THIS BITCH
« on: June 03, 2021, 08:56:21 AM »
QUEEN ON THIS BITCH!

Narrator:  I had a talk with Bea before I came on the air to give opening comments to lead into her comments concerning her match at Climax Control 301. Oh. . .my. . .gawd. . .Bea is to fired up that Satan came up from Hell, checked the temperature around Bea, and declared that the heat she is putting off makes Hell look like it is frozen over. With that I turn you over to Bea Barnhart.

The scene switches and we see Bea Barnhart in their hotel room which is located close to Earl Wilson Stadium. Bea is casually dressed in blue jeans and a black and white pullover shirt. She walks over to be in front of the camera then she sits down on a chair to present her comments.

NOT CONFIDENT OF HER ABILITIES ALICIA SENDS UNDERSTUDIES TO FACE OFF AGAINST US

Bea:  Well. . .well. . .well…what do we have here? We have Alicia Lucas, the Queen For The Day, deciding to take on the current Bombshell Champion, which she will lose against Amber Ryan, but she decided to send two losers against myself and Bill for the Mixed Tag Team Championship. You’re probably asking yourself why I call the team of Austin James Mercer and Tempest LOSERS when at least Austin has held the World Championship and Internet Championship and that is a good question. Although Mercer has managed to win a Championship here and there the fact remains that he’s a loser as he has proven numerous times. Winning a Championship and managing to hold onto it for an extended period of time are different things. As for Tempest she was simply tossed into this match by Alicia Lucas because Alicia is tied up with her demand as Queen For The Day to face Amber Ryan and lose. But enough about dissing Alicia since our match is not against her but against Austin James Mercer and Tempest.

SURPRISE

Bea’s husband, Bill, walks into the room followed by their English Bulldog Iris. Bill is holding in his hands a Red Velvet Cake, which is Bea’s favorite, and she is surprised as she didn’t know Bill got into the kitchen and prepared the cake for her without her seeing him doing it.

Bea:  Wow Bill! What a great surprise! Thank you! But I also have a surprise for you as I also managed to sneak into the kitchen and I prepared a Key Lime Pie for you.

Bea runs into the kitchen and comes out with the Key Lime Pie for Bill. Bill and Bea hand their cake and pie to the other with Iris drooling hoping she’ll get some of both.

Bill:  You continue with your presentation for our match. I’ll go into the kitchen with Iris and the two of us will devour this wonderful Key Lime Pie you made for us.

Bea returns to her chair and she places the Red Velvet Cake on the small table next to her.

YOU TWO GOT SOMETHING YOU DIDN’T DESERVE

Bea:  I won’t bore you by eating the Red Velvet Cake that Bill made while on camera while I’m presenting comments for our upcoming defense of the Mixed Tag Team Championship. For now I’ll continue to inform and instruct Tempest and Austin on just how unlucky they were that Alicia Lucas totally screwed you two by giving you a shot at OUR Mixed Tag Team Championship. You would never have received a shot at us if it wasn’t for Alicia abusing her privilege serving as Queen For The Day. But that’s okay. Really it is. We win. . .you two lose…can’t get any simpler to understand than that. Then again I cannot expect you two to understand common sense and truth.

When Bea breaks in her talking and she can hear Bill and Iris in the kitchen devouring the Key Lime Pie she made for them. Bea cannot help but have a huge smile come on her face knowing Bill and Iris enjoy her dessert.

Bea:  There is something I find interesting. I have yet to face off against Alicia Lucas in the ring but apparently she didn’t feel like challenging for the Mixed Tag Team Championship against an unknown opponent in me. Yeah, I know, the common excuse will be that she wants another chance at the Bombshell Championship, but if you really thought your stuff was great why didn’t you team with Austin and take me and Bill on? If you ask me that screams volumes about you and how not-so-well you truly believe in yourself. As for you, Tempest, I also have no history in the ring against you. After our match at Climax Control 301 I will have the history of being 1-0 over you.

Bea is amused when Bill and Iris walk out of the kitchen and head for the bedroom.

Bea:  Are you two headed to take a nap after devouring the entire Key Lime Pie?

Bill:  Yep! Sorry to say that I only got one-fourth of the pie since Iris is a pig and ate three-fourths of it before I could reach over and snag what was left. Continue with your comments. I hope our snoring won’t disturb you.

Bill and Iris walk into the bedroom and Bill closes the door to ensure when he and Iris fall asleep their snoring will not bother Bea.

Bea:  * glancing over at the table next to her at the Red Velvet Cake *  I understand why Bill and Iris downed the entire Key Lime Pie I made for them. This Red Velvet Cake Bill made is calling my name and begging me to eat it so when I’m done with my presentation you can be sure I’ll dive into the cake. Before I continue on comments concerning our upcoming match, and our two pathetic, and undeserving of a shot at a Championship, opponents Austin and Tempest, I’d like to get a few other things presented.

Bea hears snoring from the bedroom where Bill and Iris went to take a nap. Even with the door closed the snoring is loud.

COMMENTS ABOUT BILL THAT I DETEST

Bea:  I wish to talk about something that has been bothering me for a long time. That item is that many of the wrestlers on the Roster call Bill old and washed up and others call him a racist because he doesn’t believe in some things that others believe in. So let me start with the old and washed up comments concerning Bill. Since most of you are idiots and don’t do your research Bill is only thirty seven years of age, which is not old in the wrestling profession, and he’s been wrestling since he was eighteen. He is also six feet four inches and 240 pounds and you want to also call him overweight? While you don’t want to support Bill because you think he is too old to continue wrestling you go out to wrestling events, put on by other wrestling federations, where the average age of their wrestlers is pushing fifty years of age. You also support and root for obese wrestlers who make Bill look skinny but you want to condemn Bill for his weight. Stop being hypocrites. Either be consistent and tell the truth or get the hell out of our faces!

Bea rolls her eyes at the stupidity most people display.

Bea:  Now let me turn my attention to the dumb ass comments people make that Bill is racist just because he doesn’t believe all the things everyone else believes. First let me state if Bill was a racist he wouldn’t be married to me, an Asian from the Philippines, right? So your first item is debunked. Second Bill has in his family people who are White, Black, Asian, Hispanic, or a combination of two or more of those mentioned and Bill treats all his family members with equal respect and dignity so your second item is debunked. Third you need to know that there is there is only one person on the planet Bill detests and discriminates against and that is his half-brother Chris Shipman. That’s because it was Chris Shipman who killed their sister. After Chris got convicted of her death he has been trying to kill Bill. After nearly ten years Bill is still alive and well and Chris Shipman hasn’t been heard from again. Please take your ignorant comments, your biased opinions, and your hatred for Bill, to the city dump because the only place your comments belong is in the trash heaps in the dump.

With those comments out of the way Bea returns to comments related to their upcoming match at Climax Control 301.

BOTTOM LINE IS WE WIN AND YOU TWO LOSE

Bea:  When it comes to wrestling both myself and Bill always give 100 percent in every match. We never hold back and we never give less than 100 percent. Maybe we haven’t won as many matches, and Championships, as some of you have but when we were assigned to matches, we gave the fans a great show and often more of a performance than they expected and most assuredly a better performance than most of the rest of you on the Roster provide. With this first defense of our Mixed Tag Team Championship we will, again, go all out, give 100 percent, and leave the match as the winners and with the Mixed Tag Team Championship in our possession. Try to debunk that all you want but the fact remains that we are the Mixed Tag Team Champions, you two are not, and you’ll not be Mixed Tag Team Champions after we defeat you. Have a nice time leading up to our match because there will be no more nice times for you two after we destroy your wrestling careers.

Bea gives the CUT sign to the camera person and they call into the Network to inform them they are cutting their camera feed. When they cut their camera feed the Network is quick to return to regularly scheduled programming.


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