When the Weight Isn’t on the Bar

The gym was already awake when Alicia arrived.

Not loud, never loud this early, but alive in that familiar way. The hum of treadmills. The distant clatter of plates being racked. The low murmur of conversation between people who didn’t need to fill silence just to prove they belonged there. She liked mornings like this. They didn’t ask anything of her except to show up. Alicia rolled her shoulders as she walked in, gym bag slung over one arm, hair pulled back tight and practical. The mirrors caught her reflection from every angle, not cruelly, not kindly, just honestly. No lights. No crowd. No expectations beyond gravity and effort. For a long time, this place had been her refuge. And for a while after that, her escape.

Today, it felt like neutral ground.

She hadn’t planned on talking to anyone. The intention was simple: move weight, breathe, leave. But plans had a way of dissolving when Alex Jones leaned against the squat rack like he’d been there all morning waiting. He raised his coffee cup slightly when he saw her. “You’re early.”

She snorted. “You’re old. You wake up early.”

“Rude,”” he said mildly. “Accurate, but rude.”

Alicia dropped her bag and stretched her neck, rolling it side to side. “You stalking me now?””

“Nah,” Alex replied. “I just figured if anyone was going to try and out-lift their thoughts today, it’d be you.” That earned him a look. Not sharp. Not defensive. Just tired enough to be honest.

“Is it that obvious?”

Alex shrugged. “You either come in smiling like you’ve conquered the world or quiet like you’re trying not to drown in it. Today’s the second one.”

She exhaled through her nose, the kind of breath that gave something away. “Didn’t know I was that transparent.”

“You’re not, But I’ve been doing this a long time. The gym tells on people if you listen.”

Alicia loaded plates onto the bar, one side at a time. The sound grounded her. Metal on metal. Familiar. Reliable. “I’m fine,” she said, but didn’t put much effort into convincing either of them.

Alex watched without interrupting, arms folded loosely. “Want a spot?”

“For the bar or the conversation?” she asked.

“Dealer’s choice.”

She hesitated, then nodded toward the bench. “Sit. I’ll talk.” Alex obeyed, setting his coffee aside. Alicia rested her hands on the bar but didn’t unrack it yet. Her reflection stared back at her, focused, composed, someone who looked like she had it together. Funny how easy that was to fake. “I thought I was failing,” she said suddenly. Alex didn’t react. Didn’t rush her. Just listened. “My family. Austin. The kids.” Her jaw tightened. “I felt like no matter how much I did, it wasn’t enough. Like I was always one mistake away from everything collapsing.”

She finally lifted the bar and stepped back, rolling her shoulders under the weight. Not lifting yet. Just holding it. Alex nodded slowly. “That’s a heavy place to live.”

“I didn’t realize how deep I was in it,” she continued. “I thought if I just kept pushing, harder matches, longer days, less sleep, I could outrun the feeling.” She dipped slightly, testing her balance. “Turns out you can’t.”

Alex smiled faintly. “Nope. It waits.”

She racked the bar without completing the rep, stepping forward with a frustrated sigh. “Everyone rallied around me. Austin. My mom. Even the kids in ways they don’t realize.” She swallowed. “They didn’t tell me I was failing. They told me I wasn’t alone.”

“That’ll mess you up worse than criticism,” Alex said. “Because now you can’t pretend.”

Alicia laughed under her breath. “Exactly.” She leaned against the rack, wiping her hands on her towel. “I’ve spent so long being the strong one that I didn’t know how to stop.”

Alex’s expression shifted, not pity, but recognition. “You know,”” he said slowly, “when my career first took off, I thought strength meant never needing anyone. I burned a lot of bridges like that.”

Alicia glanced at him. “Your family?”

“Yeah,” he admitted. “They didn’t understand the travel. The injuries. The emotional whiplash of being adored one night and forgotten the next.” He shrugged. “Truth is, I didn’t understand how to explain it without sounding selfish.”

“So you stopped trying,” she guessed.

“Bingo.” He looked down at his hands. “And one day I realized I was surrounded by people in locker rooms who knew me better than the ones who loved me.”

Alicia frowned. “Did you fix it?”

Alex shook his head slightly. “Some things you fix. Some things you accept. My family loves me, but they’ll never fully get this life. And that’s okay.” He looked back up at her. “What matters is the people who choose to understand.”

Her chest tightened. “My kids are amazing,” she said quietly. “All of them. They don’t care about titles or schedules. They just care if I show up.” She smiled softly. “And Austin… he never once made me feel like I had to earn my place.”

Alex nodded. “That man’s a good anchor.”

“He is.” Her voice wavered. “Which scares the hell out of me.”

Alex raised an eyebrow. “Why?”

She hesitated, then said it. “Because what happens when he needs me the way I needed him?” The question hung between them.

Alex didn’t answer immediately. He stood instead, stepping closer, voice lower. “You talking about his shoulder?” She nodded.

“I’ve been so focused on surviving my own spiral,” Alicia admitted, “that I haven’t really thought about what it’s going to be like when he’s ready to come back. When he’s scared. When he doubts himself.” Her fingers curled into her towel. “I don’t want to be the strong one only when it’s convenient.”

Alex studied her carefully. “You know support doesn’t always look like encouragement, right?”

She blinked. “What do you mean?”

“Sometimes,”” he said, “it looks like patience. Letting someone heal at their pace instead of your timeline. Letting them be angry. Or afraid. Or slow.” That landed harder than any weight.

“You think I won’t be?” she asked, not defensive, just searching.

“I think,” Alex said gently, “you’re used to being the one who carries. And when roles shift, it can feel like weakness instead of balance.”

Alicia swallowed. She pictured Austin frustrated, sidelined, watching from the outside. The way she hated being still. The way she filled silence with pressure. “I don’t want to rush him,” she whispered. “I don’t want to project my fear onto his recovery.”

Alex smiled. “Then don’t.”

She scoffed softly. “That simple, huh?”

“No,” he corrected. “That intentional.” He stepped back, gesturing toward the bar. “Lift.” She did. One clean rep. Then another. Alex continued, voice steady. “You don’t have to be perfect to be supportive. You just have to be present. Let him struggle without trying to fix it. Let him come back when he’s ready….not when you think he should be.” She racked the bar again, breathing hard.

“I’m scared I won’t recognize him if he changes,” she admitted.

Alex’s gaze softened. “You won’t lose him. You’ll meet a version of him who survived something.” That thought settled differently. Not frightening, just real.

Alicia wiped sweat from her brow. “I spent so long thinking home was something I had to pass,” she said. “Like a test I could fail.”

Alex nodded. “It’s not.”

She smiled faintly. “It’s a place you show up for.”

“Exactly.” She slung her bag over her shoulder when they finished, the gym slowly filling around them. As she headed for the door, Alex called after her. “Hey, Alicia.” She turned. “You’re doing better than you think. Just don’t forget…..support goes both ways.” She nodded once, firmly. Outside, the air was crisp. Alicia sat in her car for a moment before starting it, hands resting on the wheel, not heavy this time. Steady. She wasn’t failing. She was learning how to stand beside the people she loved, not in front of them, not carrying them, but with them. And that felt like real strength.

Expectations

We hear the unstable sounds of a casino. The bright lights of the casino floor shine and pulse as Alicia Lukas walks through the main floor. A black leather jacket over the top of a red and black top and a pair of tight-fitting black jeans on her body as she looks around with a small smile, stopping and looking at the roulette tables. She chuckles and shakes her head because sitting down there would be a little bit too on the nose. Instead, she makes a left turn down a hallway and out into another room where she approaches a blackjack table, taking off her leather jacket and putting it on the back of the chair. She sits down, putting a handful of chips on the table, dealing in.

”I’ve never been one to make excuses. In fact, I have tried to be one of the more transparent when it comes to this business and this division. I have always criticised those who end up losing a match and turn up the next week or the next time they are booked and act like it doesn’t affect them. Like the loss is negated by them simply living. And I stand by my statements. A loss should affect you, a loss should strive to make you better. And that is why I’m built different than a lot of the other women in this business and this company. When I lose, it forces me to learn a lesson. And when I first came into this company, my losses were few and far between. The run that I went on was one of the best that this company had ever witnessed, and it allowed me to win all sorts of awards while also being looked at as a legend.”

She shakes her head before checking down and getting another card. She tilts her head, looking at the Queen as well as a five of hearts and a three of spades. She nods, holding on what she has before continuing.

”But, as time goes on, losses stack up a little more and you have to practice what you preach. I’m not going to sit here and ignore the fact that I lost to Bella Madison. Honestly? I’m proud of her. Three or four years ago, Bella Madison beating me would have been impossible. She wasn’t good enough, she wasn’t ready. She wasn’t on the same level as me. And even if I am a little bit slower, I am still one of the best professional wrestlers in this fucking company and Bella was able to beat me. So I am extremely proud of her. And now she’s going on to bigger and better things, facing a woman who has been dominant in her own right in a hardcore match. And while I’m going to greatly enjoy watching that, I don’t know if I’m going to be happy or sad at the time. You see, I have my own match to contend with. I have my own moments to look at.”

“I have been very vocal about my dislike of the roulette division in the past. But being a part of it, feeling the chaos and knowing that I’m able to take another championship off the list, it is something that is allowing me to have a renaissance in my career. Maybe one day I will be able to go for the SCW World Bombshells Championship again, but right now it just simply isn’t a possibility. Because I’m not good enough. And I will freely admit that. I’m not ready to go back after that world championship. I’m not ready to step up and be a part of that division. I am part of the roulette division and that is where I’m staying.”

“As its champion, I will do everything I can to elevate this title. It is the purpose and responsibility of a champion to make sure that the division that they are in gets pushed to the forefront. It doesn’t matter if it is for a championship that is considered to be the top title or a mid title or an entry-level title.”

“A championship only matters if the champion makes it matter. There have been too many in this business that believe a championship makes the woman instead of the woman making the championship. I’ve seen it time and time again in this business, in every single division, whether it is the Internet Championship, the Roulette Championship, or the World Bombshells Championship. And also in the men’s division, it happens every single year. Someone will win a championship and think they’ve made it. They’ll think that the hard work is done and they will get lazy. And then everyone suffers. So I refuse to allow that to happen. I refuse to be the one to make the Roulette Championship and the division as a whole look like a joke. So I will defend this championship against anyone and everyone and do the best that I can to make it a prize worth holding.”

Alicia looks over at the dealer who flips his cards over, revealing 17. He then gives himself a card and goes bust. He slides Alicia some chips and then starts to get ready for another round. She gets two kings, opting to split them, getting a six of diamonds with one and a five of spades with the other. She hits on both, getting a four of hearts on one side, holding at 20, and getting a two of diamonds on the other, getting to 17. She nods and hits again, going bust with the other side.

”And there is definitely someone who wants to hold this. My opponent at Inception, Alexandra Calaway. And what can I say? I’m glad that you’re getting another opportunity. I’m glad that someone who really wants this is getting a shot. Because at High Stakes, you really wanted to get your hands back on this championship. I saw it in your eyes when we stood across the ring from one another. I felt it each time you came at me in that match, and I heard it in your voice when you cut a promo on me before we got in the ring leading up to it.”

She pauses as the dealer flips his cards over. He ends up going bust, not able to match her 20. She gets some more chips and continues to play before clearing her throat and turning to her left.

”You said that you didn’t expect to make it back. You didn’t expect to get a shot at the Roulette Championship after all of your failed attempts. But truthfully, who else would it be? Look around the roster. Who else would be deserving of it, Alexandra? And I’m not saying that to blow smoke up your ass. The truth is that you are one of the most deserving. But now you have to ask yourself if you are going to be able to beat me? You have a strange way of telling us your accomplishments, going through how you’ve lost and screwed up every single major shot at a championship you’ve had, but then telling us that you fighting over and over again is how you become a legend.”

“No honey….no…”

“Look, I am all for people admitting their losses and showing that it affects them, but saying that the fact you keep on getting up and fighting is what makes you a legend is a drastic misunderstanding of what that is. I’m a legend because I’ve won. I’m a legend because I’ve beaten some of the best in the business, been the world champion, broken records, and won awards. That’s what makes me a legend. And while I’m on the topic of beating some of the best, the names that I’ve beaten are the best. They are women who are in the Hall of Fame.”

“But you?…”

“You seem to believe that women like Jesse Salco and Bobbie Dahl are some of the best. Really? Those two? You really have no idea, do you? I was ready to start throwing out words like respect and honour with you, and then I hear you say things like that. It honestly hurts my soul. Alexandra, you have been in this business for a very long time and you throw so much bullshit hyperbole out there that no one can take you seriously.”

She wins another hand, getting more chips slid over in front of her as she leans back on her chair.

”Thing is, we all have to play the hands that we are dealt, don’t we, Alexandra? While I can admit you deserve another opportunity at the Roulette Championship, I can’t sit here and say that you are going to impress me with anything that you’ve done or said. You and I got into the ring at High Stakes and I was able to walk out as the Roulette Champion. I was able to defeat you and I had the championship held high, and now we are heading into another match because your effort earned that. Your effort. Think about that for a moment. You lost, but you lost in such a way that makes the company believe you have earned another championship match.”

“Interesting, isn’t it? You lost so well that they are giving you another shot at me. It’s almost like they pity you. Instead of making you earn this through contendership matches or a tournament, you are just getting another championship match against me. And hey, I am sure that you are going to do everything you can to walk out as the Roulette Champion. And maybe, just maybe, you are going to be able to. And if you do, Alexandra, I will be the first person in line to shake your hand, tell you that you deserve it, and raise your arm up while you hold the championship.”

“But…”

“I will also be the first one to verbally destroy you if you lose. This is going to be your last opportunity against me. If this company somehow thinks that you are going to get this endless run of Roulette Championship matches against me, then they are very, very mistaken. You lose to me? And you are done. While I am champion, you do not get another opportunity. If they try and force me to sign a contract where I face you for that championship again, I will not sign it. People might think that makes me a coward. People might think I will be making excuses or running from you. But the truth is that I just don’t want to go through this again with you. I don’t want you getting infinite title shots because you are the only one that they deemed worthy to face me.”

“So, at Inception, you now have it. You have it all laid out in front of you. Use it as motivation, use it as a bit of fuel to come after me even harder than you did before. I’ll be waiting, Alexandra. I’ll be waiting to see if you really can be who you seem to believe yourself to be, or if you are going to be a failed legend, facing a real one.”[/color

The Quiet Knock

The drive over to her mother’s house from the airport felt longer than usual, even though Alicia could’ve made the route blindfolded. The familiar streets looked slightly off, as if the world had shifted a few degrees since last night’s conversation. She gripped the steering wheel tighter with each turn, the Roulette Championship belt lying in the passenger seat like a judgmental co-pilot.

Her mother’s house came into view, small, neat, painfully tidy. The porch light was on even though it was barely past sunset. Barbara always said you never knew when company might show up, even though she never actually wanted company. Alicia stood on the doorstep for a full fifteen seconds before knocking. When she finally did, the door opened almost immediately. Barbara stood there in her cardigan, hair pulled back, reading glasses hanging from a chain around her neck. She blinked once, then glanced at the belt in Alicia’s hand. “…What did you break this time?”

Not accusatory. Not impressed. Just Barbara. Alicia let out a shaky laugh. “Nothing. I, uh… can I come in?”

Barbara stepped aside. “If you couldn’t, I wouldn’t have opened the door.” The living room was exactly the same as always: beige couch, coffee table with a stack of mystery novels, the faint smell of peppermint tea. Alicia sat down, the belt resting stiffly across her lap like it didn’t belong there, and maybe it didn’t. Barbara settled into her chair, crossing her legs. “You look tired.”

“I am,” Alicia admitted.

“Then sleep.”

“It’s not that simple.”

Barbara lifted an eyebrow. “It usually is.” There it was, the bluntness. The unvarnished realism. Alicia swallowed, clasping her hands together.

“Mom… I need advice.”

Barbara blinked as if Alicia had suddenly spoken in a foreign language. “About what? Wrestling? Winning? Losing? You already know how to do all those…..I don’t….”

“No. About… the kids. Austin. Everything.”

Barbara set her book aside. “Oh. That.” A long silence stretched between them.

Alicia exhaled slowly. “I don’t think I’m doing this right. Any of it. The wrestling, the parenting, the marriage. I feel like I’m constantly disappointing someone.” Her voice cracked before she could stop it. “And I don’t know how to fix it.”

Barbara remained completely still, like she was afraid sudden movement might scare Alicia into silence. Then she said, in the same steady tone she always used, “Being disappointed in yourself doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong.”

Alicia blinked, thrown off. “That’s… not what I expected you to say.”

Barbara shrugged. “That’s because you always expect me to be cruel.”

“I don’t….”

“You do,” Barbara cut in. “And that’s fine. I wasn’t a warm mother. I know that. But I wasn’t cruel, Alicia. I just didn’t see the point in pretending life was anything other than what it was.”

Alicia stared down at the belt on her lap. The gold gleamed, mocking her. “I just… I feel torn all the time. When I’m in the ring, I feel like me. But when I’m home… I feel like I’m failing everyone.”

“And do those feelings come from what they’re saying,” Barbara asked bluntly, “or from what you’re saying to yourself?” Alicia hesitated. Barbara nodded, as if she expected that silence. “You made a choice to be a wrestler. You made a choice to have a family. Two choices can both be right and still pull at you. That doesn’t mean either one is wrong.”

“But the kids….”

“Are fed, clothed, loved, safe, and attached to you,” Barbara said. “If they were neglected, someone would’ve told you. Probably me.”

Alicia cracked a small smile. “Probably.”

Barbara leaned back in her chair. “You think I didn’t feel that way with you?”

Alicia blinked, startled. “You?”

Barbara snorted. “Don’t look at me like I’m a stranger. I wasn’t good at affection, but I wasn’t blind. You were a handful. Smart, loud, stubborn. I constantly thought I was failing you…and your brother and sister”

“But… you never showed it.”

“That’s how I was raised.” Barbara’s voice softened, barely, but enough. “Showing worry is the same as showing weakness, according to your grandfather. I never agreed, but old habits… they’re hard to kill.”

Alicia looked around the immaculate house, the straight lines, the clean surfaces. It all suddenly felt less cold and more… controlled. Like her mother had built a world where nothing spilled over because she’d spent her entire life cleaning up things that had. “You think I’m a good mother?” Alicia asked quietly.

“I think,” Barbara said, adjusting her glasses, “that you care too much to be a bad one.” The words landed heavier than expected. Alicia swallowed, throat tight.

“And Austin?” she asked. “I feel like I’ve been shutting him out. He’s scared for me. And I’m scared of letting him down.”

“Then tell him that.”

“It’s not easy.”

“Neither is wrestling grown adults for money,” Barbara deadpanned. “But you do that.” Alicia laughed despite herself. Barbara continued. “He chose you. All of you, the fighter, the wife, the mother. If he wanted simple, he wouldn’t have married someone who jumps off ladders.”

Alicia rubbed her face, groaning. “God, don’t remind me.”

“You’re allowed to be scared,” Barbara said. “You’re allowed to feel overwhelmed. And you’re allowed to ask for help.”

Alicia stared at her. “You’ve never said anything like that before.”

“I’m old,” Barbara muttered. “Sometimes I surprise myself.” Alicia let out a long breath and leaned back into the couch. For the first time in days, the weight of the belt didn’t feel like an anchor dragging her down. It felt like a piece of her, one piece, among many.

She looked at her mother. “Do you think I can really balance all of this?”

Barbara considered the question carefully, something she rarely did. “You won’t do it perfectly,” she said finally. “But you’ll do it. Because you don’t quit.” She paused. “And because your children don’t need the perfect version of you. They need the one who keeps trying.”

Alicia’s eyes stung. “Mom…”

“Don’t cry,” Barbara said immediately, holding up a hand like tears were a fire she wasn’t equipped to deal with. “This is just life. You’re doing fine.”

But there was something soft in her tone,  something Alicia had rarely heard before. Alicia nodded, wiping her eyes with the heel of her palm. “Thank you.”

Barbara cleared her throat. “Do you want tea? I have peppermint.”

Alicia smiled. “Yeah. I’d like that.”

As Barbara stood and shuffled toward the kitchen, Alicia ran her fingers over the championship belt. For the first time since winning it, she didn’t feel guilty. She didn’t feel split in two. She felt… steady. Not perfect. Not unbreakable. But steady. Maybe that was enough… for now. And maybe, just maybe, she wasn’t as alone in this as she thought.


An old enemy

”Am I being pranked?… I don’t do jokes.”

She leans back, her long blonde hair flowing down her shoulders and back as she kicks her legs up on a table and folds her arms over her chest.

”Everyone is talking about my resurgence. The great return of Alicia Lukas. Because I have spent so much time coming in and out of the company and struggling to find my footing and remind everyone of who I am, now the world wants to take notice. I became the Roulette Champion and since then I have been on an absolute tear when it comes to the different women that this company has been putting me up against. And now, as I step into the limelight again and make sure that the spotlight is purely focused on me, I have beaten a top contender at High Stakes and had such a competitive match that I’m going to be facing her again.”

“Alexandra Calaway. And how does this company decide I’m going to prepare for this match? Do I face the best of the best? Do I face one of the up-and-coming stars of the Bombshells Division like Frankie Holiday? Do I face another second-generation star like Bella Madison? Do I face Victoria Lyons? Someone who is one of the best talents that we currently have? No, of course not. Because this company enjoys watching me destroy one person with one last name.”

She pauses for dramatic effect, kicking her legs off the table and pushing her way to her feet. She’s wearing a pair of black Doc Martens, black jeans with tears down the thighs, and a cropped Mötley Crüe singlet top.

”Seleana Zdunich. A woman that I have faced before, and I’ve faced so much that there isn’t really anything else I can say about her. Think about it, there was one small shining moment where she was able to get a win over me and fluke a title run out of it. One small shining moment where she was able to raise her head high. But it was a moment that I ended. A moment that I snuffed out in seconds because she was never good enough to be my equal or better. I have told the world that every single time she and I have got into the ring, and I have backed it up every single time. So why? Why does this company keep on putting this pinhead against me? Do they enjoy watching her fail? Do they enjoy watching me destroy her? There are some sick fucks in SCW’s head office.”

She rolls her eyes and throws her hands in the air. Her annoyance and frustration are clear and on display as her body language betrays her attitude of wanting to do right by the company but also being forced to face someone she has destroyed time and time again.

”What else can I say about you, Sel? Every single time you and I face each other I say the same thing and I’m starting to sound like a broken record. At this point, it’s just getting sad. You and I have been in the ring together a dozen times. And if you take out all the times when neither of us won because there were multiple people in the match, I have walked out the winner eight times. You have beaten me once. And I’m getting sick and tired of beating the shit out of you. It doesn’t get me anything. It doesn’t get me anywhere. I am one of the biggest names to ever step foot in this company. I am someone who is in the Hall of Fame. I have won multiple awards. I am someone who, even at my lowest point, was still respected and feared while you have become nothing but a punchline.

“A punchline in the ring and in your own family. Life has beaten you down and destroyed you, and the worst part is, you’re not a bad person. Throughout every single time you and I have faced each other, I have never once degraded your character as a human being, because the truth is that as a human being you are actually very nice. You are respectful, you are sweet. You are a very loving person to your family. You are a good person. But good people don’t always get what they deserve, and while you deserve great things in your life, that doesn’t mean that you deserve great things in the ring. Because the skills that you possess just aren’t there anymore. You don’t have the heart anymore. And it’s time to give it up.”

“It’s time to walk away, Sel…”

“You don’t have the same level of heart anymore. No matter what I was going through in my life, no matter how low I ended up being viewed in this business as far as rankings or the pecking order in this company, I still had love for this business and it was never about going through the motions. It was never about watching as my career was slowly circling down a drain. But that is all that it has been for you for years. You turn up and you do the bare minimum, and when you are in the ring you don’t have that same spark that you once had when you faced me before, six years ago. That bright colour in your eyes is gone and all I see now is a vacant stare, like you just don’t care anymore. And when you get to that point it’s time to admit to yourself that you don’t belong here anymore.”

She pauses. Alicia’s voice becomes softer, almost like she is caring and trying to give advice. Her body language changes from aggressive to more human.

”I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want to get in the ring with you and destroy you physically and verbally over and over again because at this point I’m just whipping a dead horse. Your ex-wife walked away from you and has now become a world champion again. She has captured that relevance that you so desperately wanted for months and years and there is nothing you can do about it. You are going to step into the ring with me on Climax Control and you are gonna be facing someone who has beaten you time and time again, and everyone knows is better than you. And the worst part is....beating you gets me nothing. I’m not going to take any pride in it, I’m not going to celebrate it. Because you don’t deserve that.”

“But, well, you don’t deserve that celebration. It’s also because there is nothing to celebrate. Beating you is not an accomplishment. Beating you doesn’t mean anything. It’s just going to be another tick forward on my record. Another meaningless statistic. If I beat somebody like Bella Madison or Frankie Holiday it means something. Hell, if I beat Cassie Wolfe or even Bea Barnhart it means something…”

“But beating you?”

“Destroying you?”

“I’m sorry, Seleana… it means nothing… and that is the saddest thing of all… old friend…”

The Roulette Never Stops

Alicia didn’t hear the front door close over the sound of the shower running. She had the water up too high, steam filling half the bathroom, fog creeping across the mirror until even the outline of her face disappeared. She let it burn. She wanted it to. She needed something to feel real. Something to sting.

She braced both hands against the tiled wall and let the water hammer down the back of her neck, muscles aching from more than just the match that won her the SCW Roulette Championship.

She wasn’t supposed to be here.

Not “here” as in alive or standing upright, though some nights that was negotiable. She wasn’t supposed to be SCW Roulette Champion. She wasn’t supposed to be actively wrestling. The plan, her plan, Austin’s plan, their plan, had been for her to ease back. Slow down. Prioritize home. Let the young ones tear each other apart while she watched from a safe distance. But then she’d felt that itch. That primal, sick, beautiful itch. And one opportunity turned into one match turned into one title. And now she was champion again. The belt sat on the counter next to her folded clothes. It gleamed under the fluorescent light, gold plate shining like it was laughing at her. It didn’t care about plans or balance or promises. It only asked one question:

Are you willing to spin again? The bathroom door opened. She didn’t turn. She didn’t need to. Austin’s voice floated through the steam, calm and casual, like they hadn’t both been dancing around this conversation for three days. “Boys are down for the night.”

Her jaw tightened despite herself. “Mm.”

“You going to stay in there all night or should I order scuba gear?”

Alicia snorted under her breath. “Shut up.”

A pause. Then…..

“Mind if I come in?”

She hesitated. Technically, no. In reality, yes. “Whatever.” He stepped in, closing the door behind him. He didn’t try to get in the shower with her. He just leaned against the counter, arms folded, eyes landing briefly on the belt. He didn’t smile.

“So. Roulette Champion.” There it was.

Alicia kept her head down, letting the water hit her face now. “That’s what they’re calling me.”

“It’s what you are.”

“Mm.”

Another pause. Longer. He exhaled through his nose. “You weren’t supposed to go for it.”

Her fingers curled against the tile. “I know.”

“What happened to taking a step back?”

“What happened to you being proud of me?”

That came out sharper than she intended. She regretted it instantly and not at all. Austin didn’t flinch. He just nodded once. “I am proud of you.”

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“I’m serious.”

“Then why do you sound like someone died?”

He pushed off the counter, pacing slowly, restless. “Because I know what that title means. You know I know.”

“I’ve been in roulette matches before.”

“You weren’t champion of the whole division before.”

That shut her up. The shower suddenly felt too hot. She reached back and twisted the knobs off. The water sputtered to silence. She stayed still, water running down her face, hair plastered to her forehead, chest rising and falling slowly. She didn’t turn when she spoke. “What are you actually mad about? That I won it? Or that I didn’t ask your permission?”

“I’m not mad.”

“Bullshit.”

“I’m not mad, Ali.” His tone was steady, but she knew him too well. Every word was measured. “I’m scared.”

She closed her eyes. “You think I’m stupid enough to get myself killed?”

“I think the wheel doesn’t care how smart you are.” She grabbed the towel without looking at him, wrapping it around herself and stepping out, water trailing across the floor. She finally turned to face him.

“You’re a wrestler, Austin. Don’t lecture me on risk when you’ve jumped off cages and landed on barbed wire.”

“I know.”

“So why do you get to do it but I don’t?”

His jaw clenched. “Because I already buried someone I loved once.” Silence. The words hit her like a chair shot to the spine. She swallowed hard. Slow. Controlled. Measured. There it was. Not jealousy. Not control. Not patronizing concern.

Fear.

Not for himself. For her. She didn’t know whether to be grateful or furious. She stepped forward until they were inches apart. Her voice softened, but not gentle. “Don’t you dare put your ghosts on me.” His eyes flicked up to hers. No anger. Just exhaustion.

“They’re already on both of us.” She hated that he was right. She hated that he had a point. She hated that she wasn’t entirely sure she would stop if it got bad. Before she could reply, his gaze shifted past her. To the belt on the counter. She followed it. The Roulette Championship sat there, glowing like temptation itself. All shine and ego and validation. A reminder of who she was before she was a wife. Before she was a mother. Before she was expected to slow down.

He spoke without looking at her. “Did you tell the kids?”

She blinked. “No.”

“Why?”

“Because they wouldn’t understand.”

“Or because you didn’t want to explain why you went back on your word?”

She bristled. “That’s not fair.”

“It’s honest.” She looked at him, searching his face for mockery or judgment. There was none. Just weary realism.

She sighed, rubbing her forehead. “So what? You want me to drop it? Vacate and bake fucking cookies?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Then what are you saying?” He stepped toward her again, gentler now.

“I’m saying, if you’re going to do this, do it with your eyes open. Not because you’re chasing a high. Not because you’re afraid of slowing down. Do it because you’ve weighed it and still said yes.”

She stared at him. He stared back. Neither moved. Finally, she exhaled, quiet. “…I don’t know if I can separate those things.”

He nodded once. “That’s what scares me.” For a moment, neither spoke. Then she stepped past him, picking up the title belt. She ran her thumb across the nameplate. Alicia Lukas. A name she chose. A name she earned. She didn’t know whether to feel proud or guilty. Maybe both. She leaned back against the counter, belt resting against her hip.

“You going to support me or not?”

He looked at her. Not like a wrestler. Not like a competitor. Like a husband. Like a father. Like someone who had already seen too much loss to pretend it couldn’t happen again. “I’ll support you,” he said finally. “But I won’t pretend I’m not holding my breath every time that wheel will  spin.”
 She nodded slowly.

“That’s fair.” They didn’t hug. They didn’t kiss. They just stood there, steam fading, silence stretching between them, not warm, not cold. Just real.

The realities of marriage.

Not explosive. Not dramatic. Just two people in a bathroom, trying to make peace with the fact that love doesn’t erase who they were before they found it. It just makes survival a team sport. And somewhere in that silence, Alicia knew: The next time that wheel spun, it wouldn’t just be her stepping into the chaos. It would be both of them. Whether they liked it or not.

The resurrection

"I know what you are all thinking"

Alicia looks up, stepping forward with an arrogant, shit-eating grin plastered on her red-painted lips.

"This wasn’t meant to happen. I was supposed to be done. Not just done — I was supposed to be useless. No longer the woman that everyone had feared. The former SCW World Bombshells Champion. Someone who had failed every single time she faced a champion over the last three years. Three years of being in and out of this company. Three years of not really knowing what I wanted to do with my life or who I wanted to be. And I’m not gonna lie, some of the time when I was away from this crazy business and this company I looked at my life and I was content. Content with what I had accomplished and content with what I had done in my career."

"But those moments of contentment, those moments where I looked at my career and my life and I felt at peace? They were fleeting. Few and far between. They weren’t times when I would linger on the thought and think to myself that my life was where it needed to be. I always had something else, something in my stomach that was pushing me forward. Telling me that it was time to come back. Telling me that I needed to re-dedicate myself to all of this. But, in that three-year span I struggled to do anything of note. I had those little moments of self-doubt coming in and crushing every bit of spirit that I could ever seem to want."

"I felt lost."

"For a very long time. I didn’t just feel lost in my personal life, but also in my professional life. I felt like I’d lost who I was. When I looked in the mirror, I didn’t see the strong-style southern belle any more. I didn’t see the woman who had come into this company and taken it by storm. I didn’t see the woman who had one-awards in broken records. I just saw a broken woman. Someone who wasn’t good enough to hang with the best of this company and this business any more. Someone who wasn’t good enough to be a champion. Not just someone who wasn’t good enough to be the world champion — someone who wasn’t good enough to hold any championship in this company. I was sick to my stomach and completely disgraced. I was disgusted with myself and who I thought I was."

Alicia pauses and nods a few times before folding her arms over her chest. Wearing a black leather biker jacket and tight-fitting black leather pants with a red crop top, she tilts her head and starts laughing to herself.

"But the truth is that stars and talent fade. I don’t know if this is my last ride. I don’t know if it’s the beginning of a new one. I just know that I’m here to enjoy it. I am here to be the best roulette champion that I can be. I am here to re-dedicate myself to this company, to this business, and this is the resurrection of Alicia Lukas. And I know that that is going to sit a little bit wrong with some people. I’ve never been what you would call popular with the other girls in this company."

"And why would I be? I have always been someone who has been very vocal about the levels of respect that I’m willing to give to other competitors. Women that I look up to and that I do see as equals. I’m more than willing to sing the praises of them. But there are some women in this business that shouldn’t be here. They are just taking up space in the company and don’t really do anything of consequence. And when I first stepped foot in this company there were a lot of people who didn’t like the fact that I was calling them out because of their lack of talent or the fact that they were being dominant in the division that at the time was full of trash cans."

"Amazing, isn’t it? Amazing how, unlike those former champions, I begged and pleaded with management to get the best of the best into this company. I didn’t hide from the best challenges. I wanted to face them. And lo and behold this company delivered some of the best women’s wrestlers on a silver platter for me to face, and I went to war with them weekend after weekend until I couldn’t do it any more — until I felt myself break and I needed time away. But the bodies that I laid down and the women that I brought into this company laid the foundation of the Bombshells division and made it the powerhouse that it is now."

"But, with every positive comes a negative. And we’ve never really been able to get rid of the women in this company that don’t deserve to be here. And I am facing two women who certainly push the boundaries of what should be accepted as a professional wrestler in SCW. On the one hand we have Twisted Sister. A crazy, heavy-metal-loving psychopath who doesn’t even get booked here all that often but whose entire aesthetic screams that she would belong in the roulette division."

She laughs again before shrugging.

"Now, I’m not going to sit here and badmouth Twisted Sister in the way that you would think. She doesn’t get booked all that often but when she does, she certainly puts everything on the line and she is certainly entertaining. But she’s just not that good. So I don’t understand why she’s getting an opportunity at the roulette championship. I don’t know why I’m not defending it against Harper Mason in a rematch. I’m sure she’ll get one eventually if she has the balls, but as of right now I’m having to face a woman like Twisted Sister who is barely in this company and is nowhere near the same level that I am."

"I will break you, Twisted Sister. I will break you in half. I will destroy you. I will beat the hell out of you and I will send you packing. But I still don’t have the same venom and vitriol in my voice and in my heart for you as I do for the other woman in this match. You see, the other woman in this match has no excuse whatsoever to be as bad as she is. She has no excuse whatsoever to be a loser like she is and someone who wastes everyone’s fucking time."

"Bea Barnhart…"

You can hear the change in Alicia’s voice, going from aggressive but almost jovial to quieter but more menacing.

"You are a woman who should be a star. With how much experience your husband has and the fact that you’ve always followed him around and you have experience yourself in this business, you should be able to learn from everything that you have seen and everything that you have done and become something better — not someone who occasionally gets a lucky win and occasionally flukes herself into a championship opportunity. You should be a respected veteran. But you’re not. You are not because you simply don’t listen. You come out and make all of these outlandish comments about what you think you’re going to do and how you think you’re going to win and you promise victory, and then when you don’t deliver on it, instead of showing some remorse and showing that you’ve grown and learned, you simply ignore it."

"Like in your mind you can get away with just saying a few words about how you lost and moving on, making those same outlandish promises. You show no consequences for your actions and no consequences for your losses, so you make all of the losses not matter. And if your losses don’t matter, then why the fuck should we ever think that your wins will matter? It means you don’t have real passion for this business, no passion for this industry and no love for this company or any of the champions or championships within it."

"So what, Bea? What are you going to do?"

"Are you going to come out swinging and try and become the roulette champion? Are you going to make us believe you care about the roulette championship or care about beating me? Or are you going to do what you always do and make outlandish promises with little to no backup, get in the ring and then embarrass yourself, and then turn up in a week or two and have it all mean nothing? What’s going to happen? Because this is what I’m willing to do. I’m gonna give you a beating so bad that you have to acknowledge it, that you have to acknowledge what happened to you, that you finally show some goddamn passion for this business that I have laid my life on the line for, and that I have laid my body on the line for for the better part of the last ten years."

"When this match ends I’m going to be the roulette champion and you two can go back to doing whatever it is that you do."

Nerves

Feeling nervous is a fact of life. It’s something that you are going to have to deal with no matter who you are or what you do. From a teenager starting their first job, not knowing what to do or where to go, to a CEO negotiating billion-dollar deals, and in the life of a professional wrestler, nerves tend to pop up more often than not. Every single time Alicia is getting ready to go out before a big match the nerves will bubble up. But that isn’t always a bad thing. Nerves let you know that you’re alive. Nerves let you know that what you’re about to do means something to you.

That your actions will have consequences, and what you want to do will be rewarding. Nerves keep us on our toes, stop us from being complacent, and push us towards our goals and what we want to do.

And for Alicia, she had a lot to be nervous about.

Over the last few months, she had believed that maybe her wrestling career needed to start winding down. That maybe it was time for her to start looking at retirement. To teach the next generation or to stay at home with her kids. Maybe to start planning on having another child with Austin. All these thoughts ran through her head, but at the same time there was a small problem. She still had the burning passion for professional wrestling. To be a professional wrestler. To turn up to work and do her best and try to become a champion. This is something that would never disappear, and because of that, she knew she wasn’t ready to hang it up.

Every match that she had, she was nervous. Every single time she stepped through that curtain and went out into an arena full of paying customers, the same thought was running through Alicia‘s head. Was she still good enough? Was she still at that point where people wanted to see her? Where people would pay to see her? Or was it going to be a situation where they would look at Alicia, see what she used to be, and become disappointed? That is what was running through her head. That is the kind of nerves and pressure that she was dealing with. And that was in her professional life.

But what about her personal life?

Well, that also had its moments. Especially today. Alicia took in a deep breath, holding it in her lungs for a moment as her hands sat flat against the bathroom counter in front of her. As she exhaled, she opened her eyes, staring into the mirror with a small shake in her breath. In the mirror she studied everything—her makeup, her hair, her jewelry, her dress. She swallowed hard and pushed off the bathroom counter. ”It’s ok. I can do this.” she muttered to herself under her breath. She looked over at the door, stepping forward, grabbing the handle, and pulling it open.

As she stepped into the next room, her sister Zoey stood with her arms folded, also wearing makeup with her hair done in a long flowing dress. ”You ready?…”

”Yeah…”

She wasn’t. Her mind started flashing back to when she married Michael. Hell, she thought it was going to be a fairytale and he was going to be perfect. She thought about how it ended, she thought about her previous relationships. All the men who had let her down in her life after she thought they were going to be perfect for her. Her heart started beating harder and harder in her chest as they moved from the small room out into the hallway. Zoey led Kallie and the other bridesmaids down the aisle in front of Alicia. They went down the aisle and in front of everyone. The familiar tones of Here Comes the Bride played.

Alicia took another deep breath, clutched her bouquet in her hands, and started to walk. Moving down the aisle she could feel everyone’s eyes on her. Her mother and all of her mother’s friends as well as everyone from Wolfslair. She moved down the aisle and felt herself starting to shake. But then her eyes found Austin.

His long hair that had grown back over the last few years was tied in a bun. His beard was trimmed but still long. He smiled when he saw her. His hands clasped together as he looked handsome in his perfectly tailored suit. His groomsmen and best man all matching with color and style as Alicia moved up to face him. Alicia‘s oldest son Ryan was in charge of handing his mother‘s hand to Austin, stepping in for Alicia‘s father, who of course had passed away.

Austin lifted Alicia’s veil and couldn’t hide his happiness. A smile stretched even wider across his face as they turned to the celebrant. Their wedding was not being held in a church, it was not being presided over by any form of religious affiliation. But it was a celebration of their love. A celebration of who they were as people. Austin slowly looked to the side before the celebrant said anything, gave a small nod, and whispered, ”You’re beautiful…”

She blushed and swallowed hard before turning away. The ceremony began. But the nerves were gone. The excitement was still there. The happiness was still there. But Austin had calmed her. Reminded her with one simple look and one simple phrase that she belonged here. And she had finally found her happiness.

Warm up

”Well, here we go. Stage one of my little plan has come to fruition. I told everyone that I was going to go after the championships that I hadn’t won. Rebuild everything from the ground up. And a few weeks ago I was able to accomplish the first part of that.”

Alicia pauses for a moment, a hand sliding into the front pocket of her tight black jeans. A black and red leather jacket sits over a cut-off band shirt by the deathcore band Lorna Shore.

”Winning a number one contenders fatal four-way. And I’m sure some of you are surprised that I even want to go after both of the championships that I haven’t won—the Internet and the Roulette championships. I have been very outspoken in the past about the Roulette and its rules. The fact that it is chaotic and you could find yourself in some kind of barbed wire cage of death match, or alternatively a line dance-off where you need to be the first person to put on a pair of cowboy boots. But the truth is that the chaos is what people find interesting about it. And because it’s something I’ve never done before, because it’s a mountain I’ve never climbed before, I want to do it.”

“But make no mistake, this doesn’t mean that I never want to hold the World Championship again. In fact, it’s the opposite. I of course want to be the SCW World Bombshells Champion again, but I need to take these other goals off first. I need to be able to earn my right to go after that championship again, and until I do, I’m going to be doing everything else I can to accomplish my goals.”

“I don’t care who I have to face. I don’t care who I have to beat. And I don’t care what levels of hell I have to go through if I’m going to earn the right to call myself a champion again.”

“This company has gone through many transitions, and I’ve gone through many transitions as a person. I’ve watched as my career has crumbled and fallen. I’ve watched as people have completely written me off as a threat despite the fact that I always put up a fight. The women in this company who have been able to beat me earned it. And it’s only been the best of the best that this company has to offer that have been able to say that they were better than me. Women like Amber Ryan, women like Roxi Johnson. Legends of this business who earned their place. They are the ones who have been able to beat me and leave me in the dust.”

Alicia chuckles to herself and paces back and forth a little.

”But getting to this point wasn’t easy. I had to beat three women to get this opportunity. Admittedly, Bea Barnhart and Seleana Zdunich aren’t exactly what I would consider to be challenges to me one on one, but in a triple threat match or fatal four-way anything can happen. But my opponent this week is someone who I beat in that four-way—Cassie Wolfe.”

She chuckles and stops pacing, staring directly ahead as she continues addressing her opponent.

”And of course there’s another connection here. I’m not blind as to why I’m facing you in a match, Cassie. Your relationship with Harper is definitely going to make it more interesting. But I have to ask you an honest question. How does it feel being used? How does it feel knowing that you are a tool? Because that’s what’s going on here. You are being used as a tool to elicit some more interest in the match that is not even going to have you in it. I’m going to be facing Harper Mason for the Roulette Championship and you probably won’t even be at Violent Conduct. And if you are, it will be in a throwaway match that no one cares about.”

“So right now, this is the most important you are going to be. You are a puzzle piece in a story that you are not the hero of. They are using you to give Harper a reason to dislike me even more than she already does. I’m coming for Harper‘s championship and she’s already going to want to keep it, but now she’s going to have a reason to want to hurt me. Because I’m going to hurt you. And I’m going to do it as a point of principle.”

“Not to be a bitch, but you deserve it.”

“You and women like you are a stain on wrestling. You see, professional wrestling is about evolving and getting better. It’s about making sure that you conquer as many mountains as you can. But you and Harper don’t evolve. You are mediocre. You stay in the same little bubble where everything is familiar and safe. You don’t go outside your comfort zone. So I’m going to do you a favour, Cassie. I’m going to drag you out of your comfort zone and I’m going to force you to evolve. Because either you are going to get better and you are going to beat me, or you are going to drown. And you’re going to realise that your ceiling in this company has been reached and you can’t break through it.”

Flowers and dresses and bridesmaids oh my!

Bridal boutiques are weird.

Pink light blue and white coloured walls with flowers all around as well as books with pictures of other people‘s weddings. A place where you can choose what you want for your wedding while being bombarded by ideas from other people. Originality is truly dead. And this is where Alicia Lukas finds herself. A place where she has been many times before in her life. Not only for herself but also for friends and family.

Twice before Alicia has been married, twice before she’s had to go through the planning. She understands what she is looking for and what she wants but at the same time, she’s over it. Sick and tired of all of the pageantry, sick and tired of having to pick out everything from colors to a theme, bridesmaids' dresses, wedding dresses, and flowers. All of it felt like a colossal waste of time. She knew she wanted to marry Austin, she loved him, she had been through this whole thing with weddings before so why did she want to go through it again when all she wanted to do was live a life with the man she loved?

Family, family, and friends. They wanted to celebrate their love and Austin seemed to be all for it. So Alicia was not going to rob him of that. She was going to Smile and do everything she could to make it a wedding that they would both remember.

So here she was, sitting in a bridal boutique in New York City. Accompanied by her sister and maid of honor Zoey as well as her bridesmaids Kallie Reznik and her childhood friend Bianca. The four women laughed as they flicked through books while trying to find ideas. ”Look at this one. It looks like a fucking cupcake threw up on it.”

”Oh that's pretty!” Zoey shot Kallie a horrified look, her long blonde hair was tied back as she wore a black leather biker jacket, and tight black jeans with a chain that goes from a belt loop at the front to the back. Alicia is dressed similarly to her sister as Kallie and Bianca are both dressed in regular jeans and t-shirts.

Alicia shakes her head and grabs hold of the book before turning it toward the girls with a smile ”These are the dresses that I want to get. And don’t worry Kallie…. I’m going to get you a dress that gives you a little extra space around the midsection.”

Kallie smiles and nods, before she can say anything though Zoey pops up. ”The Australian got you pregnant again? Already? Tell him to get a fucking hobby.”

Alicia couldn’t help but laugh, Kallie narrowed her eyes. ”Alicia, did you get her address? That is a little wider around the shoulders to accommodate her?”

Zoey raised her eyebrows and stepped forward, folding her arms over her chest before letting out a laugh and padding Kallie on the shoulder. ”Damn you got snarky….”

Kallie smiled and gave a small shrug as Zoey backed away. Alicia let out a deep breath and made a few notes in the notebook that was sitting next to her about the flowers and the dresses. ”You’d think after I’ve already done this twice that I’d be better at it. But the truth is I have no idea what I want to do.”

”But weddings are so fun and magical and beautiful and it’s a celebration of your love with Austin.”

”You could always just have your wedding on one of the shows. Then it would dissolve into a bunch of brawls and chair throwing. You should do that, that sounds amazing.”

Alicia shook her head and smiled ”I already joked with Austin about that. It’s why we’re not going to have Alex and Finn anywhere near each other…. or Aaron and Kayla”

Zoey rolls her eyes ”Aaron and Kayla fighting in high heels? Shit that would be entertaining not to mention the fact that Kallie would be freaking out.” Zoey points at Kallie who frowns and pouts.

”I don’t want there to be a murder at my wedding Zoey….”

”It wouldn’t be that bad…”

”No…it would be…Kayla told me she’d throw Aaron off a bridge….”

Alicia shakes her head again as Zoey smiles. Meanwhile, Bianca who had been quiet this entire time looks horrified at the other three.

”What is wrong with you people?”

Alicia sighs heavily and sits back. Bianca wasn’t used to this. She wasn’t used to the world that these three came from. Alicia realized that it was going to be a big job having to cross her lives together. People from outside the wrestling business as well as everyone inside. She took a deep breath and grabbed her notepad standing up and folding her arms over her chest.

”It’s okay, I’ll figure it out. But this day has to be good. I owe it to Austin.”

A bad Martial Arts film.

”No, I’m not happy with how my Blast from the past campaign ended…”

Alicia closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. Her teeth grind together as she looks away from the camera. Almost as if she would be struggling to make eye contact with any of us while watching the promo from the comfort of our own homes.

”I lost. Not only did I lose a loss to one person in this company that I despise. I despise her attitude and I despise who she is. I went against her and I failed. And I have no one to blame myself. You know, I’ve always made a big deal about how people handle losses in this company. So many of you will lose a big match and then pop up the next time we see you like nothing is wrong. Like it’s just another day at the office. But I need to practice what I preach and I’m gonna be completely honest with every single one of you right now. I’m angry at myself for losing that match.”

“I’m angry at myself for throwing away a perfect opportunity. And losing to that woman, failing to beat her, and getting eliminated by Micah makes me sick. Because I should’ve beaten her. I should have been able to put that bitch in the ground where she belongs and I should have been able to go on to the final of the blast from the past and walk away the winner. Instead, I let it all slip through my fingers and I ended up failing. And for someone like me failure is Like dying inside. Failure is something that I’m not used to. For years I was looked at as the gold standard in women’s professional wrestling but in the last few years at least I have become a joke.”

“The punchline….”

“Much like Micah. But the difference between myself and that arrogant bitch is that when I failed I picked myself up and came right back to work. Now that tournament is over I’m still here and I’m still ready to go. Meanwhile, she’s packed up and gone back to Hawaii. Just like we all said she would. And that’s what you get when you let someone like her come back into the company. She uses the blast from the past as an opportunity to try and jump the line and then instead of earning her position in the company she just leaves. That hasn’t happened with me. And if I had got to that final I damn sure wouldn’t have done what she didn’t threw it all away.”

Alicia starts to get angry, you can see it in her eyes and her body language. You can see it in the way she carries herself herself.

”If I got through to that final I would’ve faced Frankie Holiday and Laura Phoenix. I would’ve solved the riddle of Frankie holiday and I would’ve bitch slapped Laura Phoenix back into her retirement. But I didn’t get that chance because instead my spot was taken up by a woman who couldn’t even be bothered to stick around and be a part of the company that gave her the life that she has now. She has no pride, she has no heart, and I’m still here. I’m still here ready to be the best and to show the world that I’m still relevant. If Mercedes Vargas can do that and beat Bella to become the Internet champion I sure can do something similar…”

“But, to prove that I have to go up against a woman that I haven’t really seen or heard from in years. Song. And this won’t be the first time she and I have faced and it won’t be the last I’m sure, it just happens to be the first time with faced in this company. Song and I have known each other for years but it’s been a very long time since we’ve stepped foot in a ring against each other or even in the same company. She came back and I was injured. Now here I am and I’m ready to get back to work and she is who SCW management has decided I’m going to be facing.”

“And I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, everyone knows who song is. She has been a part of SCW for years and was a major part of honor wrestling.”

“But now, song and I are going to go one on one and try and get that forward momentum moving. The last time we saw a song she was able to pick up a win in a tag team match. But, as far as real momentum goes that isn’t going to help her. Real momentum is facing people weak and weak out at being in the fires of battle. Real momentum is facing the best of the best one on one and overcoming them. Something that Song hasn’t been able to do. Something that she’s not going to be able to do when she faces me.”

Alicia can’t help but laugh to herself and shake her head.

”See, I have certain goals that I want to accomplish. I want to win the bombshell championship won last time, I want to win the Internet championship and the roulette championship since I’ve never held them. I want to be able to recite my career and finish on my own terms instead of going out with a whimper like some of the women in this company. I want to be able to hold my head high and be one of the greatest bombshells this company has ever known. Which, I already am but I want to remind people of it. I don’t want to go out with a whimper. I want to go out with a bang”

“And to accomplish all of this I need to keep winning. I need to beat everyone that this company puts in front of me and that includes you song. I don’t have anything against you personally but right now you are in my way. You are in the way of everything that I want to accomplish and to get to where I need to be. I need to move you out of my way. And I have to do it the best way that I know how. By marching down to that ring and stomping your head into the mat until I leave it as a stain.”

“And if I lose to you, if I lose to you after everything that you’ve done and failed to do since you returned then I have no business being in a SCW ring.”

“So you better get ready. You better bring everything that you have because that’s what I plan to do. I’m gonna do everything I can to get you out of my way and I will do everything in my power to make sure that when that bell rings, you are the one who is lying on your back staring at the lights and I have my handheld high. Every single win is a step closer to what I want to achieve. And Mercedes Vargas better be ready because you song are the first stepping stone toward my first goal. The Internet championship. This is the resurgence of Alicia Lukas. This is my resurrection and my redemption….”

Best Laid Plans

It was finally time. It was time to tell the one person about her engagement that she was dreading. Everyone else in her life she wanted to tell, but she also wanted to do it in her own way. But this person was the one person that she knew was going to be a challenge. Her mother. A woman who did love all of her children but whose particular brand of love was always filled with a certain amount of judgement and domineering.

A woman who had an ego problem, the main problem being that her ego was the one that mattered most

It didn’t matter how her children felt, didn’t matter how anyone else in her life felt. Barbara was going to do what she wanted and when she wanted. She was going to say what she wanted when she wanted, she didn’t care about your feelings. It was a trait that her daughter had also inherited. In fact, it was a trait that both of her daughters had inherited. But Zoey and Alicia had learned tact, their mother hadn’t.

Alicia took a deep breath walking toward the large stately manner that her mother called home. It was on an old plantation on the outskirts of Atlanta Georgia. Just outside the suburbs but still close enough to the city that they can drive in whenever needed. Alicia flew in, Strategically bringing her sons. As the door opened, the boys ran to go find their grandmother. They loved her, and she doted on them, she was an excellent grandparent and had been a good mother but there was always an air of contention hanging over Alicia’s head whenever she talked to her mother.

Her mother wanted what was best for her.

She knew that, she accepted that. The only problem was that the way her mother went about things always rubbed Alicia the wrong way. And deep down she never forgave her for being the catalyst of her first relationship. And while that relationship had given Alicia two beautiful sons that she loved it had also come close to completely ruining her life, destroying her self-worth, making her feel like she was an object through abuse. Her mother had her hand in that making the match to begin with. And even though her mother could not have known the monster that her daughter had been betrayed to it was still something that Alicia kept deep inside as a small amount of anger and frustration.

The boys ran off to go and play in the large backyard leaving Alicia standing with her mother. Her mother smiling and moved her hand toward a small table with a chair on either side and some tea sitting in the middle. Alicia took a deep breath and sat down knowing that it was only a matter of time before she would have to tell her mother the good news. ”I do love seeing them so happy”

Alicia can’t help but smile, her mother was right. Seeing the boys happy definitely warmed both of their hearts. Alicia grabbed her tea up taking a small seat before putting it down instantly drawing the attention of her mother. Normally when she would take a sip of tea she would make her face, only drinking it to make her mother happy. But this time she was so deep in thought about what she was about to do that there was no movement, no subtle twitch, no hatred of the liquid that she was drinking.

”Alright… Spill it, you clearly have something on your mind”

Alicia cleared her throat and sat back, she knew that look on her mother‘s face and there was no point in trying to hide it. She swallowed hard and reached into her pocket before sliding her engagement ring on her finger and then placing her hand on the glass table. ”I..I’m getting married..”

”Again?” Her heart sank. Unsure of what to say next as her mother raised an eyebrow. Alicia froze her hands sitting there as her mother then shook her head and chuckled under her breath. ”Relax….I knew about it and I’m just teasing..”

Alicia setback her shoulders dropped as she felt like a weight was lifted off her shoulders but then a question rattled around her brain. She raised an eyebrow and tilted her head. ” Who told you?”

”Your sister.”

”Of course” Alicia muttered under her breath. While she was relieved that her mother knew and seemed to be taking it so well she was also disappointed that she wasn’t the one to tell her.

Her mother raised an eyebrow studying Alicia‘s body language before setting down her tea cup and turning towards her daughter. ”She seemed to believe that you were worried about telling me. Why? I’m happy for you. Despite my reservations about Austin he seems to be a positive influence on not just you but also the boys.”

”I just thought that you might be a little disappointed that I was choosing to get married again. After what happened with my previous relationships and marriages.” Her voice trailed off as she stared down at the glass table.

Her mother took a deep breath pushing it out before leaning forward and reaching across the table, grabbing Alicia‘s hand and giving it a squeeze ”The first one was my fault. Neither of us knew what kind of family that was. And Michael? He died, are you meant to stay single the rest of your life? And as for the one in the middle? Well, we all make mistakes dear” Barbara chuckled and looked over at the boys who were still playing. Alicia just slowly gave a nod to her mother and sat back. She wasn’t going to press the issue. She was happy, her mother seemed very accepting of it and now she wondered why she didn’t just trust her mother.

Now the real work would begin. The planning of the wedding, what kind of wedding would it be? And where would it be? Now it will become real. Now she was able to smile and enjoy it.

It’s been a while

”One thing I really love about this business, that I’ve always loved about this business, is that it’s unpredictable. Things don’t always go to plan.”

Alicia lets out of deep sigh and folds her arms over her chest.

”You can have a clear version of where you want to go and what you want to do. You can do everything you can to reach that point and in the end, something unexpected can happen to throw a wrench in the plan. The triple threat match that I was last in, Harper Mason was the one who walked out with the wind. And the thing is I can’t complain about it. She earned that win. Harper earned everything that she was able to get and she went on to blaze of glory and was able to compete for the Sin City wrestling internet championship…”

“She didn’t win. But she tried.”

“And that’s what’s important I guess. You can’t take that win away from her though. Beating myself and Crystal. That’s the risk you run by getting into these multi-person matches. You can lose without actually losing. You can get beaten without actually getting beaten. But at the end of that match, I was the one who didn’t get to go to blaze of glory. So I went home. I relaxed and watched the show. I watched everyone else beat the hell out of each other and I saw a new champion's crowned and legacies get  solidified.”

“But, coming out of blaze of glory. It’s blast from the past season. And this year gets to be a little bit different. This year I don’t have to rely on a tag team partner who may or may not turn up to fight. This year it’s just on Me. A one on one elimination tournament. and my first opponent in the first round is someone I know very well.”

Alicia slightly smiles and reaches over grabbing a Snickers bar and popping it open. She starts to eat it before tilting her head and taking a deep breath.

”Candy, a former SCW roulette champion. A woman who has challenged for the top championship in this company a few times. And failed. Candy is the answer to a question that nobody asked. And while everyone else seems to be rolling out the welcome mat and is happy that she’s returned and decided to be a part of the blast from the past tournament. I find myself wondering why. Why are you here candy? Why are you back? Is it just to make up the dollars in this tournament? Because you look at what you’ve done since you’ve come back and that’s the impression I’m getting.”

“You are just going through the motions. The same old candy, the same old attitude. You turn up you flash your smile at the camera you trot out your silly little fluff ball of a dog, you throw your glitter, and expect everyone to cheer and clap for you like trying to seals. Do you care that you’re at a tournament where you could potentially realize a dream that you have had for years and never been good enough to accomplish? Whenever you open your mouth we never get an insight into who you are or the passion that you have for this business. All we get is bubblegum dreams and unicorn farts.”

“Rainbow bullshit spewing from your mouth”

“You and I have done this song and dance before. You told me how you wanna beat me and you’ve told me how good you can be and how I’ve underestimated you but the truth is every single time we’ve got into that ring. I have our class. You would show the world that I am simply better. And the fact that you’re still using that stupid glitter? The fact that you’re still blatantly cheating in front of the world and getting away with it? It makes me sick. So I thought you would’ve learned by now that it is not acceptable to do things like that. But you have. Because as I said, you are the same old candy. The same attitude same outlook on life the same tired nostalgia act full of bullshit.”

Alicia throws her arms in the air, clearly annoyed at this entire situation as she stomped back and forth before rubbing the back of her neck and refocusing forward taking a deep breath.

”And that’s all you are. A nostalgia act. You’ve walked back into the company and you’re doing the exact same thing expecting the exact same reaction. But you are taking up a spot in a tournament that could’ve gone to someone else who might want to become the champion. You might actually have the same passion that the rest of us have for this business. And that is the difference between you and Me. You are here to make up the numbers and a smile and relive your glory days back when you held one championship in this company in a fluke. To rely on nostalgia and be little Miss Perfect for the crowd.”

“I’m here to win. I’m here to get back to where I deserve to be. I’m not saying that I’m going to win this tournament and go straight for the Bombshells championship. Cause the truth is, I told everyone I wanted to work my way up from the bottom. The blast from the past is something that I have never won that I want to. If I win I might go for the Internet championship, I might try and snatch that out of Bella‘s hands. I might go for the roulette championship, or I might go right after Kayla Richards and that bombshell championship to get to the top of the mountain again.”

“But, at least I have a plan. I have desires and passion for this business. I’m here to win and I’m here to be the best that I can be. What about you candy? Why are you here? Are you here just to do as I said and walk out of some kind of tired nostalgia acts to wave and throw your glitter? Are you here to get a few cheap pops from the crowd so you can feel good about yourself? Or are you here to try and win? Are you here to prove everyone wrong? The years that’s all we’ve said about you. That you’re a nobody. That if we took away all of the glitter and candy that you would be nothing. And you have done absolutely nothing to prove us wrong.”

“This is your chance. This is your chance to prove all of us wrong and to stand up and get your chance at becoming a legend. Some people would say you’re a legend now that those people are idiots. You had one championship rain with the roulette title back in 2020. You haven’t had any big wins against the best of the best in this company and you haven’t had any moments with people sitting back wide-eyed and impressed. You are a one-hit wonder. And now? Now you have to prove that you are here for the right reasons. Because I don’t think you are. So I’m going to do what should have been done a long time ago and I’m going to put you out of your misery. and I’m going to go on to win this tournament and reclaim my glory, reclaim my passion, and reclaim my championship.”

Publicity

It was beautiful. The engagement ring that Austin had bought for her. Alicia smiled, tilting her head as she took in every detail of it. She had always disliked gold, the engagement ring that her first husband had given her. The abusive arsehole that had given her two beautiful young sons, but had also robbed her of her innocence. The one he got her was gold. Even though she had told him how much she despised it.

The one that Austin had got her was silver, a simple band that wrapped around with a few smaller diamonds that framed a larger one in a beautiful Gothic style setting the rapids way around the precious jewel and across the top.

The light from above caught it at just the right angle which made rainbows of light dance across the walls depending on what angle the light was shining onto it. She took a deep breath feeling her heart race as she continued staring at it. Everything that Alicia had gone through was a reminder of the pain that you can endure if you have the drive to succeed. She had succeeded in life despite everything that she had been through and all the setbacks she had faced.

From her beginnings as a young girl whose father had left at a young age and being raised by a struggling mother who eventually married for money not love, to being in an arranged marriage with a man who looked at Alicia as a possession, to being a teenage mother who had to run and get away for fear of her life. She had gone through all of that before the age of 20.

And through it all, she had forged a career that was in some ways legendary. A multi-time world champion and a woman who is now able to give her sons and Austin‘s children everything they could ever want.

And through three failed marriages and the public scrutiny that came with it, she had become a stronger person. But even with that strength, it was hard for her to show the world that she and Austin were now engaged. Fear of that public scrutiny based on her previous relationships had caused her to pull all of her happiness inward and not share it with the world. A tremendous amount of guilt washed over her as she knew that she was stopping Austin from being able to verbally tell the world how he felt about her.

”It would be even more beautiful if you wore it all the time” Austin‘s booming voice broker concentration. She shook her head looking over at him. She had been sitting in front of her vanity mirror brushing her hair before she had been distracted by the ring. She didn’t even know how long she had been sitting there staring at it. But long enough for Austin to notice

She’s small as she looked at him, his hair which she had shaved off in a moment of defiance to try and change everything about himself had now grown back. Still not all the way down his back like it had been at one point it was now shoulder length. He leaned back against the headboard he’s ripping muscles and tattoos catching Alicia‘s eye. Even now when he looked at her and she could see him in this way she still felt like a lust-filled teenager letting her hormones run while. ”I know. And I will. It’s just hard when I don’t know how people are going to react.”

”Who cares?” Austin scoffed and moved to the edge of the bed before getting to his feet and moving over standing behind Alicia and looking at them both in the mirror as he kissed her cheek and then down her neck causing Alicia to tilt her head. ”Besides, I know that Alex found out. He let the cat out of the bag when I saw him staring at me and I pressed him as to why.”

Alicia‘s breath hitched in her throat as she felt often move closer to her. She took a deep breath and tried to regain her composure before raising an eyebrow and tilting her head a little further to the side. ”Mmm ok, I get what you mean. It’s not going to stay a secret for much longer with Alex knowing. He will let it slip eventually to Sonja and she will tell everyone.”

Austin couldn’t help but smile and laugh as he moved around to Alicia‘s front and dropped to one knee grabbing her hand ”Ahh yes. The three ways of wrestler, communication. Telephone, telegram, and tell-a-Sonja.”

Alicia can’t help but laugh. She shakes her head and takes a deep breath. ”Yeah, I guess it’s time that we tell everyone. I’d rather that it came from us that they heard about it from someone else and then had to pretend that they didn’t know when we told them.”

Austin nodded slowly and stood up holding out his hand to pull Alicia to her feet. He held her close, his hand reaching out as his thumb lightly brushed her cheek. ”I just want to be able to do fun things like start to plan the wedding and get invitation sorted out so we know who isn’t coming and who is”

Alicia clears her throat, trying to hold back her excitement ”You want to wedding plan? You’re excited to do it?”

Austin smiled kissing her on the forehead before laughing ”No, I’m just going to let you pick what you want and smile and nod”

Alicia winked ”Good boy…”

Starting from the bottom and now we’re here

Alicia sits back with a grin on her lips. Rolling a small white ball in between her thumb and forefinger as she reaches out and grabs the centre of a roulette wheel spinning it sheet then rolls the ball sideways letting it go around before hearing that familiar sound of the ball clicking into one of the mini paddles. The ball has landed. Double zero. She can’t help but chuckle before sitting back and looking forward.

”Well, it did not take very long did it? When I first came back to this company, I told everyone who is watching Me right now as well as everyone who is in the arena and anyone within earshot including the guys running this company that I wanted to start from the bottom and work my way up.”

“I even gave you all a perfectly valid reason why”

“But, since some of you might have forgotten, let me rewind and tell you why. When I first signed with this company I was shot straight straight to the main event of the bombshells division. Due to Me being the final-ever honor wrestling women’s champion, I lined up a shot at the SCW Bombshells championship. So I’ve never really had a chance to work my way up through this company, like so many others have.”

“And I wanted that chance.”

“Now, I don’t want you all to get this twisted. This is not some way for me to wiggle my way into people’s good graces or make you all think that I have left my ego at the door. Far from it. I know I’m still better than most of the women in this company. But I wanted to see how long it took me to walk back in here and then work my way up. Now, I am under no illusions here that my name and reputation weren’t going to help boost me forward but the fact that I returned and I’m already in a championship match should tell you all how good I still am”

Alicia couldn’t help but chuckle. Spinning the roulette wheel again and letting the ball rip before it dropped straight back into double zero again. Alicia raised her eyebrows the statistical improbability of this being astronomical as she continued her promotional material.

”And what a way to return to championship glory than to go after a championship I’ve never held. The roulette championship. The championship is synonymous with the most random chaos you’ll ever see. When you go into a roulette division match, you don’t know if you are going to be dropped headfirst into a Texas death match, or a Pittsburgh pillow fight. The possibilities are endless and it’s that kind of chaos that many people in this company simply cannot wrap their heads around. It takes many of us out of our comfort zones. And that is a reason why I wanted to go after this championship. Because it takes me out of my comfort zone. And at this stage of my career, there isn’t much that can take me out of my comfort zone.”

“I’ve basically seen and done it all”

“So now, I get to step in the ring with the current Roulette Champion Victoria Lyons and a woman that I know quite well in Bobbie Dahl….”

She pauses for a moment looking down at the rule at Me before looking back up. Holding the ball in her thumb and forefinger again, she doesn’t tempt fate just yet instead staring ahead and continuing.

”Now, Bobbie, it’s been a long time hasn’t it? You know, I’d hate to say this but you really are a disappointment. Not because of any other reason than I know what you could have become and what you are. See, many people might forget this but there was a time when I needed to take an extended break from this company because you took me out. You destroyed me. My shoulder which was hanging on by a thread was completely ripped out and annihilated by you. Do you remember that Bobbie? Because I do.”

“And I’m going to be completely real here. I’m not disappointed because you destroyed my shoulder, I’m not disappointed that you took months away from my career. I’m not even disappointed that when I came back to face you, I beat the brakes off you and walked out with my hand held high. No, Bobbie, I’m disappointed because there was a brief shining moment where you could have been a dominant force in this business. I’m disappointed because I honestly thought that you were going to explode and become this bad bitch that everyone thought you were going to be that you were going to live up to all of that promise that you had and all of that potential.”

“I thought that maybe, just maybe you were going to pose a challenge to most people here and you were going to become a world champion.”

“But, that isn’t what happened. Instead of going on to become a dominant force that would wreck most of the division and show everyone that you had what it took to become a world champion, you reverse it back to this unfunny clown. And yes, you are a clown. Not the type of clown that kids sit there and laugh at the type of sad clown that people throw a couple of spare dollar bills toward because you clearly need to buy your alcohol and get drunk. You run around here with Artie looking like a complete buffoon and when you get opportunities like this, when you pick up the ball and look like you have a clear shot at scoring a touchdown, you fumble. You fumble and your career falls in the toilet again. You are a fucking disappointment. And I’m done dealing with someone like you. I’m going to bring your entire circus down around you Bobbie.”

“And show why a clown should never be around a championship”

Alicia down holding the roulette ball in her hand before spinning the wheel and letting it go. We hear the familiar clicks but instead of Alicia looking down at where the ball landed she simply continues.

”One person who isn’t a clown, who should be around a championship is our current roulette champion, Victoria Lyons. And what a run you’ve had. You’ve brought the roulette championship up to prominence. A championship that was once looked at as a sideshow and a joke has become a real prize. And you did that Victoria. You did that by making sure that you held yourself to a high regard as a champion and beat everyone that they put in front of you. All while trying to advance your career further by taking on world champions and even winning the mixed tag team titles for a time.”

“Impressive. Very impressive. Being a double champion is no easy feat and I believe that so many in this company don’t give you the due that you are owed. They simply don’t appreciate you for the champion that you are. And this might seem like I’m giving you a little pat on the back but the truth is that you are worthy of respect because of how you have carried yourself. Even if we look past all the arrogance we can see that you are a champion.”

“And trust me on this if there’s anyone who knows about having a large ego and arrogance it’s me.”

“With that being said I feel like you are owed the respect of Me telling you exactly what’s going to happen. You see Victoria, while you are trying to force your own legacy and get away from your family name while also trying to embrace it, I have been in your shoes before. But unlike you when I was given the chance to go out on my own, I took that opportunity with both hands and made sure I didn’t post on my father‘s last name. Instead choosing a name that no one knew so I could forge my own legacy.”

“And be my own woman. And that’s what I’m continuing to do now. So I’m going to get in the ring and do everything that I possibly can to beat you and to beat Bobbie and take that roulette championship. After being a three-time world bombshells champion the roulette title is something that I’ve never held and it’s something I’ve never experienced. It’s not in Me to simply roll over and be happy to have the opportunity, I’m always the type of person who puts everything on the line every single time every single night. And I accomplish the impossible. And this is far from impossible so imagine what I can do. Imagine the mathematical improbabilities that I can accomplish.”

Alicia can’t help but laugh as she steps back from the Roulette well, revealing that a third role of the ball has landed on the green double zero. She chuckles to herself as she walks away ending on the improbable and almost impossible role of the ball.

One step

It had been a rough week.

Being on the comeback trail after being out of the ring and out of the business for so long was never going to be a walk in the park. The problem with taking time away from something as intense as professional wrestling is that when you get back into it you need to work your way into it. The problem is that you can’t. If you have made a name for yourself in the professional wrestling business then you are going to come back and instantly have the spotlight thrust up upon you. Everyone is always going to expect you to still be the same person you were before you left. To be at that same level, and the level that Alicia Lukas was at was suffocating.

Everyone who looked at her in the gym had seen her weekend and week out for the last few years. She had gone in the ring with them, given them her knowledge and her strength. But, that was in a private setting. Sitting with friends and fans and sitting with family was different and quieter. When the spotlight is on you and you are in the ring, you are exposed. Exposed to everything. Your failures and your shortcomings are laid out for everyone to see and for everyone to judge.

That reality will always breed pressure. And pressure isn’t always a negative thing. Some pressure can push down on you and break you, destroy everything you are and everything you possibly could be. Pressure can be suffocating, it can suck all the air out of your lungs and make it hard for you to breathe. But there are some people who push back against that pressure. Who can break through and show that they are more than what the world believes them to be and what the world will allow them to be. The ability to break through pressure is one that separates true champions from the pretenders.

And Alicia had always been a true champion.

Despite the fact her return hadn’t gone as she had planned. Despite the fact that she had been stuck in the middle of the division instead of raising back up to the place that she believed she should be, she was still doing everything in her power to make not only herself but those around her better. She still turned up to the gym every day, but she still helped those around her and trained as hard as she could. She did everything in her power to live up to the name of reputation that she had forged through her years of hard work, perseverance, and championship glory.

As 2024 started to draw to a close Alicia knew she had a few appearances to make, working hard to make sure that she was going to end the year off better than the year had begun. She arrived home, got out of her car, and stretched as she looked over at her home. Smiling as she knew that her family was inside. Her sons Rory and Ryan, and her partner, her boyfriend, Austin James Mercer, and his son, Marcus, and daughter Amelia.

She walked up the concrete path toward the front door reaching out and opening it. She stepped inside and looked around, while the lights in the lounge room were on, the hallway to the kitchen was dark and only lit by a few candles that had been placed on the ground leading toward the kitchen. Alicia raised an eyebrow moving down the hallway and into the kitchen where she found the dining room table had been set. A beautiful red tablecloth has been laid out with a few white plates and silverware. And sitting on one side of the table was Austin.

”Aus….whats all this?”[

Austin did little to answer the question instead offering a small shrug. His shoulder-length brown hair, the hair that he had previously cut short that had grown out once again was now tied back in a tight bun. His beard was trimmed and immaculately kept. He wore a button-up white shirt and black pants as he kept the sleeves rolled up. ”I can’t just do something nice?” he smiled at her, Austin wasn’t the type to smile very much. Even before everything that had happened when he lost his wife Lisa. Austin was never one to show his emotions outwardly. He was a mystery to most people. Except those who knew him.

And Alicia was someone who definitely knew him. She knew that behind the steel gaze that he offered the world, behind the mask of indifference that he wore when dealing with most people there was a deep reservoir of feeling. All of the human emotions that we all feel. Anger, frustration, hatred, happiness, and love. All of these things Austin not only felt but felt deeply. ”I’m not going to say I don’t appreciate it, but is there an occasion for it? Something special I’ve forgotten?”

Austin shook his head serving up a perfectly cooked medium-rare steak and grilled and butter asparagus. A protein-rich meal with vitamins. One of Alicia‘s favorites. Something that she would often eat but would have to cook for herself. And she hated cooking. Austin poured her some wine before sitting back down and offering up a casual smile. ”Ali, we’ve known each other a long time. When I first met you, I admired you. I admired how much you love this business, I admired the way that you never let your family get to you. Like Me, you had a parent who is in the business business. We both had names that we had to live up to, but while I kept my last name you were able to forge your own life, you didn’t coast on your father‘s reputation or his name, you did it all yourself.” Austin paused, swallowing hard and sitting back before continuing. ”You and I were destined to be ships passing each other in the night. As much as I loved Lisa, and still in many ways, do love Lisa, she isn’t what I would’ve considered to be my soulmate. She gave me two wonderful children and some of the best years of my life. but I.”

Austin pauses again. This time he seemed to struggle with what he was going to say. He closed his eyes as he tried to find the words. Alicia, threw a shaky breath leaned forward. Her fingertips slightly danced across the back of his hand. Austin, as if on instinct turned his hand sideways, allowing Alicia’s fingers to slide into his palm and squeeze his hand. A reassuring gesture. She wanted to hear what he had to say. As Austin opened his eyes, Alicia gave him a small smile and a nod coaxing it out of him.

Austin smiled and continued ”I love you. I’ve always loved you. But while I was with Lisa and you were with Michael, I never allowed myself to feel it. And even when they both passed and you and I became closer, I thought it was going to disrespect both of their memories. As much as I blame Michael for everything that happened, I still wasn’t sure that it was respectful for you and me to be in a relationship. And I thought I did, but in the end, I couldn’t. And I don’t want to lie to myself anymore, Alicia.”

She smiled, her heart racing and beating in her chest. ”I love you to…”

The two looked at each other. Both of them smiling. Austin stood up still holding Alicia‘s hand. He moved around the table. His muscular frame towered over her as he leaned in and gently kissed her. Being as gentle and tender as anyone could ever be. Austin very slowly dropped to one knee as Alicia‘s eyes opened. Her heart skipped a beat and her breath hitched in her throat. She wanted to ask him what he was doing but all she could manage was a trembling lip. Austin had her hand in his. He smiled and grabbed a small black velvet ring box from his pocket.  ”Ali, will you m-“

”Yes….”

She didn’t wait for him to get the entire question out. Blurting out her answer. Austin smiled sliding the ring on her finger before standing up. Alicia wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling herself up and wrapping her legs around his waist. After their warm embrace and passionate kiss Austin Laughed and looked down ”Your food is getting cold” Alicia loaded herself down laughing as she put her forehead on Austin‘s chest. The two getting ready to go about their night. Preparing themselves to eat and then tell the rest of the world what was going to happen between them.

Lost

”There are always bumps in the road. Always obstacles that you have to overcome and face. No matter where you are in your life. No matter what you do in life. There are always things that get placed in front of you trying to stop you from achieving your goals”

Alicia slowly emerges. Wearing a black leather jacket over a black band shirt. The logo of the hard rock band Ghost is clearly visible. On the lower part of her body, she wears a pair of tight black jeans with the knee holes torn. And black combat boots over the top. Her long blonde hair is tied back in an interesting fashion. The top is tied back and braided like a cat o'nine tails. The bottom half kept down and flowing down her back and shoulders. Underneath her right eye, a black stripe of wall paint and her ruby red lips shine in contrast to the darkness around her eyes.

”This business is as fast-moving and unforgiving as the rest of the entertainment industry. And make no mistake that’s exactly what we are. Entertainment. Admittedly what we share is a lot closer and more akin to what the ancient Romans used to enjoy the Colosseum than what we now see on the silver screen that gets all sorts of awards from academies and critics. But the fact remains that we are entertainment. And as such we fall into the same traps. Everyone is always looking for the new shiny person who is going to come up and replace the old ones. The new name that is going to become a champion and be pushed forward as the face of the company.”

“Meanwhile, champions of the past are usually looked at in a certain light. Either they leave, standing on the sidelines making snide comments about the current stars. Acting like they could still come in and dominate if they wanted to all the while never fully committing to coming back. I’m of course talking about people like Amber Ryan and Mikah. Now don’t get me wrong, both of those women are incredible athletes and both of them were the best that this company had to offer. And I’m sure they could come back and give most of the women in this company a run for their money. And in Amber Ryan’s case, she might even go on another reign of terror.”

“But, that is still one category.”

“The former champions, so full of bitterness. So full of anger toward the company and ready to make so many comments about how they could do it better. But never actually coming back to do it and prove it. But what of those that do? What about those women who at one point in time with the greatest company had to offer and have stayed? Samantha Marlowe. Mercedes Vargas. Crystal Zdunixh. These women refuse to leave and instead stay. Much to their detriment. Because they are looked at as failed nostalgia acts. As women who can’t live up to what they used to and are just now walking talking popes. Coasting off of their names of the past like some form of heretical ghosts. Unwilling just to die like their careers.”

Alicia can’t help but laugh to herself. Her whole body tenses. Her mind seems to race as she comes to different realizations. Thinking about her past, her present, her future. Thinking about everything else that has been laid before her and everyone else in the company. Her bright blue eyes snap forward and a small arrogant smile comes across her lips.

”So, which one am I then? Which category does Alicia Lucas fit into? While I was gone from this company I didn’t run my mouth. I might have occasionally called out a member of the roster or two, but I didn’t sit in my Ivory Tower and talk about what was wrong with the company. I didn’t badmouth the current champions, I didn’t try and wiggle my way into the good graces of the people who ran this company. I knew in my heart that Christian and Mark were just a phone call away at any time I wanted to come back all I had to do was pick up that phone. All I had to do was tell them I wanted a new contract. They would welcome Me with open arms.”

“Now, if I didn’t fit into that category, the one with the bitter old farts who didn’t know what her real place was in life. Then I suppose I must fit in the same category as Mercedes Vargus and the others that I mentioned right?”

“I suppose I am simply a woman who is passed her prime. No longer the best that this company has to offer. I’m just a shambling, shunting, struggling corpse. A ghost of what I once was. A great champion, now reduced to someone who is going to lose time and time again as those who are younger than me and better than Me become champions. Is that my future? Is that where I’m going? Has the legacy of the strong style Southern Bell become a joke?”

“Maybe..”

“Or maybe I’m something new. Something different. When you look at my career in my past I have never, ever walked to the same beat of everyone else’s drum. In fact, I’ve always been unique. Somewhat disagree with that, someone might think I’m nothing but arrogant. and there is certainly something to be said for that. I am arrogant, and with my track record in my past why wouldn’t I be? I’ve done things that most women in this business could only dream of. I dominated three companies at once. Who else can say that? I broke records. I won awards and I beat the best that this business had to offer. So, am I arrogant? Am I cocky? You damn right I am.”

The arrogant smirk that had been plastered on Alicia‘s face slowly started to grow. The arrogance grew with her attitude. But the smoker twisted contorted and changed into something more sinister.

”Unlike others I have earned the right to be arrogant. But my arrogance never crosses that line. A line where I can’t see my failures. That is what has always set me apart from others. I look around at all the other names in this company and they still don’t get it. When I was in the middle of my run that made people jealous, I pointed out so many different mistakes that they made and here I am a few years later and I can still see the same mistakes being made by the same people as well as the same mistakes being made by new faces. The more things changed the more they stay the same indeed”

“Alexandra Calaway is definitely someone who makes these mistakes. Last month, the last time you all saw me, I was in a match with Alexandra and Andrea Hernandez. The winner would go on to face Kayla Richards. Now, both Alexandra and I failed. I took the loss hard and went home, and now here I am my first match back and it is still affecting me. I wasn’t good enough that night to win and go onto face Kayla. Andrea Hernandez was and she went on to give a great fight to our champion. I learned from that loss like I always have. You know who didn’t learn a goddamn thing? Alexandra.”

“Forty years old and still unable to come to terms with a loss and learn anything from it. No wonder you have never been able to become The champion that you always thought you should be.”

“You are still fighting to win everything you think you deserve. It’s admirable in a way. You doing everything you can to try and gain that glory. Except the one thing you need to do to get what you want. You can’t bring yourself to really examine your losses, when you win it’s all roses and unicorns and rainbows. But when you lose you make a few Flippin comments shrug it off and move along. You don’t sit there and dissect it. You don’t do an autopsy on your loss you don’t learn a goddamn thing from instead you just keep throwing yourself into brick walls expecting something to change.”

“But nothing changes”

“You still end up at the bottom of the pile staring up at people who are better than you. And while I failed so far in my comeback aside from a few wins that have ultimately been pointless, you look back at my career in this company and I accomplished things. I accomplished things here, I accomplished things in WWH, and I accomplished things in honor wrestling. I was the biggest name on this fucking planet at one point. I was infamous and had bitches and morons from other companies constantly calling me out because they were nothing jealous of the success that I had.”

She chuckles to herself, shaking her head before continuing.

”You on the other hand get made fun of because of your stupidity. The fact that you can never admit when you’re wrong and the fact that everyone else in this company thinks you’re a joke. You’re only claim to fame is being the world champion of a company that shut down. Congratulations. Every single time you’ve tried to climb up that ladder while you’ve been here you’ve been smacked back down to the bottom wrong. And now you have to face me one on one at the final show of the year while I’m in such a bad mood that I’m just about ready to rip your head off. And the crazy part is it’s nothing personal.”

“It’s not even really business. You see if this was something personal between us then I would care. I’d be angry, I’d be stomping my feet and I’d be promising the fans a great show while I tore your arm off and beat you to death with it. But I can’t even do that because I really don’t care about you Alexandra. You mean nothing to me. And I can’t even say it’s business either.”

“Business implies that I would have something to gain. What does me beating you gain? You have something to gain if you beat me. You beat me you’ve just knocked off a three-time bombshell, champion, and a woman who won wrestler of the year woman of the year feud of the year. A woman who dominated WWH a woman who dominated on a wrestling and a woman who is dominated here. You get to tell the world that you were able to beat Alicia Lukas.”

“I beat you and what do I get? I get to say I beat you? Great, so does everyone else in this fucking company”

“No, winning a match against you does nothing for my career. So instead I have to settle for another motivator. And that motivation is simple, I don’t want to lose to you. I don’t want people to look at me and believe that I’m such a failure and that I have fallen so far from what I used to be that I’m going to lose to the likes of you. Someone whose greatest accomplishment is being able to get her succubus hooks into LJ Kasey.”

“And I’ll be dead if that is the vision of Me the people close out 2024 with. So congratulations. You get to have a match with one of the best in this company and a bonafide legend. But it’s not going to help you….”

“Merry Christmas bitch.”

Are we ok?

Alicia had been distant the last couple of weeks. She had not been booked for any matches in SCW since her match against Tempest, in which Austin was forced to be the special guest referee. Losing matches happens, being put in the ring with someone like Tempest, and losing was nothing to be ashamed of. Alicia knew that. But at the same time, she couldn’t help but feel slighted. She had watched as her sister Ran through everyone in the company before being stopped by Tempest having her career and her momentum halted.

She would get in the ring and get some sort of revenge for her sister. As well as keeping her own comeback tour on the rails. But in the end, all that happened was she lost to the better woman. She was just angry that her significant other had been roped into it because of his connection to both women.

And after a loss, not being booked being thrown away and forgotten like she was nothing. It played on every single one of Alicia's insecurities. Through everything in her life, the one thing that was always going to play on her mind would be a fear of being forgotten. Thrown away like she was nothing. That is one thing that she could never handle that she could never live with and it is the one thing that was playing on her mind. Losing to Tempest meant that she had been forgotten. She was sitting at home playing the Happy Mother and the Happy Housewife, doing exactly what she had been doing before she decided to go back to professional wrestling and try and finish her story the way she wanted to.

But none of that seemed to matter now, her personal relationship had suffered.

Austin had tried to continue like nothing happened, going to the gym and working out as well as helping out the young members, taking his own sabbatical from the ring as he healed up his shoulder after surgery. But, he sensed there was something wrong with Alicia. He kept his distance trying to make sure that he didn’t upset her or didn’t make her feel worse.

Unfortunately, this had the opposite effect. Alicia closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she stood in the kitchen, staring at her cup of coffee before taking a sip and placing it back down again moving her neck from side to side. A few large cracks were that echoed through the kitchen. She had just gotten back from taking both of her boys to school before coming home and finding Austin getting ready to go to the gym. He looked over at her an eyebrow raised as she wasn’t in her workout gear and didn’t have her gym bag sitting next to her ready to go like she usually does.

”Not coming today?” Austin was concerned, but he tried to hide it. His voice boomed with the kind of confidence that he usually had. But, Alicia could tell there was something in his voice. A small sliver of concern

She took another sip of her coffee, putting it down before folding her arms over her chest ”What’s the point? Since I lost to your work wife I haven’t been booked. All I’ve done is sit on my butt and watch her get a fucking bombshells championship match and then fumble the ball…” her bright blue eyes burned, sparkling with the type of anger and frustration that was usually reserved for the most dire of situations.

Austin shook his head, putting his gym bag down. He realized that all of the frustration Alicia had been feeling over the last few weeks had bubbled to the surface. ”That isn’t fair. You seem to be angry at Tempest for simply doing her job. Or maybe you are angry at me for simply doing mine.”

Alicia took a deep breath, realizing that her words came out a fair bit harsher than she had realized. She calmed herself down before standing straight up and nodding slowly at Austin acknowledging that maybe she took it a little bit too far. ”I’m sorry. I’m just frustrated. I know what this business is like, you can’t win every match, and everyone ends up losing it at some point. I just can’t stand the feeling that I’ve lost a step. And the worst part is I also feel like the company has moved on from me like I don’t matter and they have forgotten who I am. The fact that they haven’t asked me to show to cut a promo or to talk to fans or do personal appearances or have a match just hurts”

Austin slowly smiled and stepped forward. He reached out and slightly ran his thumb across Alicia‘s cheek, he leaned down kissing her slowly, the type of kiss that you give someone when you have nothing but passion and love for them. Alicia‘s breath hitched in her throat as she seemed to go weak at the knees, Austin smiled and stepped back.

”That’s cheating Aus…”

He simply chuckled, leaning against the kitchen counter and looking her up and down. ”The way I see it you have two options, option number one. I go to the gym. I have a workout and then I come home while you stay here. Have a day to yourself and relax and then make you dinner.” He pulls for a moment Alicia raises an eyebrow waiting for option number two. ”Or… I stay home with you, we spend the day together and maybe get a personal workout in”

Alicia couldn’t help the chuckle, Austin turning on his charms was always amusing. He was good-looking and confident but sometimes he would come out with things that were so cheesy Alicia couldn’t help it laugh. But this instance it was a moment of levity that she needed to pull herself out of the hole that she had started to dig for herself. ”Alright big guy… I think a day together is exactly what the doctor ordered”  Alicia took a deep breath finally calming down and getting all of the frustrations out of the past couple of weeks she could now move forward. Or at least that was the plan.

An old enemy

”Well, that was a horrible experience. It’s something that I don’t think any of you know how it feels,  to be put in a situation like that. See, this profession is hard enough as it is. We put our bodies on the line and we get in the ring and we go at each other all for people's amusement. You win, you lose and you take some steps back. Admittedly some people can look brave when they lose and their careers won’t suffer but that is a rarity in this business.”

Alicia shakes her head her long blonde hair tied back in a messy bun with her lips painted a bright cherry red, a black Hoodie sits over the top of a black and grey band shirt showing the logo of American Deathcore band Whitechapel.

”I’m not going to stand here and say that losing to Tempest is some kind of big dishonorable event that is going to ruin my life. There is no shame in losing the tempest. I just hate the fact that Austin got dragged into it and thrown in the middle. I hate the fact that he was involved and it took my focus off of the match. And I hate the fact that since I lost her, I have been sitting on the sidelines waiting for my chance to get back in the ring. All it’s done is piss me off.”

“And don’t get it twisted I’m not angry at Tempest. She did nothing wrong. She got in the ring with Me and when the dust settled she was the one who had her handheld high and she got to move on with her career and go after Kayla Richards, who is our current bombshells champion. And yes Tempest did fail but she also put up a hell of a fight.”

“More of a fight, than I probably would have right now”

“But, the end of that match did leave me wondering where I was going to go from here. I had come back and started to remind people exactly who I am and what I’m about, but that loss to Tempest and then having to sit at home made me question exactly why I was doing this. But in the end? I came to the same answer as I had before. I know why I’m doing this, I know the kind of legacy I have in the legacy. I want to submit. And I can tell you this right now I am not going to rest until I reach every single one of my goals that I have left.”

Alicia can’t help with small shaking her head as she folds her arms over her chest.

”But, now that I am back I get to face some new name in SCW in Prudence Pierce., Hold on a second. Wait, what do you mean? Prudence isn’t new? What do you mean she used to be known as Kate Steele? What the fuck is this bullshit?”

Alicia looks over to the side, someone is sitting there whispering to her about Kate's different name and what she’s gone through. Alicia shakes her head her eyebrows raising before turning back and continuing with her promo flabbergasted at the unbelievable bullshit she just got forced to sit through and listen to

”Kate Steele. New name, same bullshit. When I came to this company I knew of you, I’ve seen you in our previous employers company and we had tussled many times before and over and over again. I ended up with my hand held high while all you did was fail. And all you ever did was make excuses time and time again. You would come back and talk about how you were going to make sure you tried your hardest only to fall on your ass and fail.”

“And never in meeting where you went wrong or taking ownership of it. Constantly making excuses to the fans and also to your family. Now, I understand you just got married so you’re going to change your name and do your best Crystal Hilton impersonation. But most people don’t completely change their first name their personality and everything about themselves to fit their new narrative when it comes to their wife.”

“Most people just take the other person's last name and get on with it but in typical Kate Steele/prudence Pierce fashion you have to overcomplicate things and spit in the face of common decency and social norms just because you feel like it and you want to be contrarian because you aren’t good enough for anything else”

“And since you got back all you have done is lose. You walk in you act like you’re going to do something great and then you fail. You make excuses and you fail and this is a constant thing with you. It is a cycle of abusive bullshit where you seem to think that you are capable of breaking the Internet and becoming a star when you’re not even capable of remembering your own past.”

“So he’s what’s going to happen Prudence. You and I are going to get in the ring in this hard-core match and I’m going to grab any weapon that’s around me and I’m gonna beat the hell out of you with it. Not because I actually think it’s going to beat any sense into you because that ship has long sailed. I am going to take out the collective frustrations of anyone who has ever believed in you or believed the bullshit that has come out of your mouth about Changing and I’m going to unleash it on you. All of that frustration and all of that anger is going to come out all over you by my hand. And then maybe just maybe you’ll finally get it through your head that no one wants you here and no one cares….”

I thought we were done with this.

She was sore. She hadn’t been this sore in a very long time. Then again, she hadn’t been in the ring for a very long time. Alicia opened her eyes, getting hit with the bright light from outside. She groaned and shook her head sitting up. The pain in her back shot straight up through her shoulders and the back of her neck.

It was her first day off in a week. The last five days Alicia had done nothing but train. And not just train the younger members of the gym, she trained herself. Hitting the ropes, doing grappling training, heavyweights, cardio. Everything that Alicia would need to make her come back.

She stood up, walking across her bedroom with a stretch before looking back with a smile. For the first time in what seemed like forever, she felt alive.

She made her way out of the bedroom and into the kitchen, there was no one there. The boys were at school, and Austin was at the gym. This was her day. Her day to recover and relax. To enjoy herself and let her body heal and her mind get refocused on the goal ahead. She walked over to the coffee machine, turning it on, and got everything ready. The second she was done she pulled the mug to her face giving it a smell.

She let out a deep breath of happiness and relaxation. Turning and moving across to the kitchen counter, feeling content with everything that was going on in her life.

She took a sip of her coffee, smiling and closing her eyes. But being interrupted by a knock at the door. She got to her feet and moved through to the door, opening it up, tilting her head with a half smile and half look of confusion. ”Mom?!?” And sure enough standing in front of her was her mother. She stepped in past her daughter shaking her head as she did so going straight to the kitchen. Alicia tilted her head confused as to why she was here. ”Sure…come in…”

”What are you thinking?” She was annoyed about something, not just her words but also her body language showed it. Alicia shook her head and folded her arms over her chest not even bothering to ask why. She knew damn well that her mother was going to tell her. In great detail probably. ”Going back to wrestling? After you finally got out?” and there it was.

Alicia took a deep breath, pushed it out, and closed her eyes before trying to centre herself and opened them. She was going to try and stay calm. ”Yeah? That was always the plan. When I left, I never said I wasn’t going to go back. I always planned to. Time just got away from me.”

”Time got away from you?” That comment seemed to get under her skin. Alicia‘s mother took a deep breath and closed her eyes trying to do the same thing that Alicia did before opening them and speaking in a much more calm and mature voice. ”You spent years beating yourself up and doing the exact same thing that your father did. And then you find a man who loves you, you settle down and stop wrestling, you had it all you had financial security. Why are you doing this?”

Alicia groaned and rolled her eyes. This is the same attitude she always had. ”Is it really that hard for you to understand? That professional wrestling is something that’s ingrained in who I am? It’s the same with me and it’s the same with Zoey. This is what we do.”

Her mother stepped forward, folding her arms over her chest exactly like Alicia. ”I don’t understand you…. you have it all. You’ve got to live that dream, you made money, you got out of it.” She moved around Alicia, her arms moving as she went. ”Look at what happened to your father. He didn’t know when to stop and it destroyed his body. And he’s gone, I had to watch while you broke down. When he passed away, you’re miserable.”

Alicia shook her head, she understood where her mother was coming from but at the same time, the situations were not the same. She stepped forward, reaching out and grabbing her mother‘s hands. ”Is that what this is about?” She shook her head and sighed. ”Dad and I are not the same. Not only was he in his 50s and still wrestling, he was 7 feet tall and he drank like a fish. And never worked out. He didn’t even know what cardio meant.”

Alicia‘s mother couldn’t help but laugh. Even though they hadn’t been together in over 20 years, she was still devastated when Jason passed away. ”I know…I know….but, I just don’t want you to let yourself get broken down….I want you to have a good life.”

Alicia noted slowly, stepping back with a smile trying to sound as calm and kind as she possibly could. She understood where her mother was coming from. Especially since she had woken up this morning feeling so sore and beaten up. ”Mom….I do…”

I hate your face

”Relevance…”

Alicia takes in a deep breath and then pushes it out, standing on the top deck of the ship and looking down at the moving waves she tries to keep herself with a sense of calm and dignity. Something that is becoming increasingly harder and harder to do when dealing with fucking children.

”It’s hilarious that that’s where your mind went. Relevancy. Apparently, I have fallen so far that I’m no longer relevant because I decided to take time off and spend it with my children. I decided to go home and relax after years and years of hard work. Hard work that allowed people like you to benefit from it, Harper. Not that you give two shits about it.”

“I fought and I clawed over and over again week and week out to make sure that everybody was looking forward to the matches that I was in because I wanted people to be excited about women’s wrestling. I wanted people to be excited about all of it. I wanted to drag each and every woman that I got in the ring with up to my level because I knew that competition was going to make everything better. If I just stood there and ran through entire rosters of people then it quickly becomes boring, so I need people to be just as good as me  and I need people to be held up to that same standard.”

“Relevant?”

“It looks to me like I’m more relevant now than I’ve ever been. All you have to do is look at people like Mercedes Vargas, or even your cousin Jesse Salo before she decided to take some time off. They stuck around and have been collecting a paycheck. They haven’t been trying to better themselves or better the others around them. All they’ve been doing is stinking up the place.”

She chuckles and rolls her eyes before turning around and folding her arms over her chest.

”For you to compare me to her as well just shows how little you know about the professional wrestling business. And just how much you still have to learn. You see most people in your position, real people, not just fake bitches like yourself, they would realize that this is an opportunity. You are standing there running me down saying that I’m no longer relevant. So if you happen to beat me then what have you done? You have just beaten an irrelevant old nobody. Congratulations. You’ve made any relevancy that you would’ve gotten from beating me mean nothing”

“Idiot..”

“Now, I have already established exactly what I hope to get out of this match with you Harper. I told you that I wanted to test you to see if you earned that contract. I was allowing you to show me that you earned it and that you belong. I was allowing you to stand up for your generation against mine. When I went over to Japan and trained there I had my body destroyed and my mind broken. I had to get rebuilt back up.”

“I was ready to test myself in the United States and when I got here all I could see was a bunch of weaklings. Entitled weaklings. I step away from this business for a year and when I come back, that’s what I find again. I was giving you a chance to show me that I was wrong. And all you’ve done with stupid comments like that is prove that I’m right.”

Alicia throws her hands in the air, clearly frustrated and angry with the position that she finds herself in

”This business means everything to me. When I was a little girl, I wondered why my father was never around. And it was because of this business. Everything went through my teenagers and when I was a young adult, it all led me to want to pursue this. Because I wanted to see what this business was like and why it took my father away from me. And I fell in love with it.”

“I fell in love with everything. The travelling, the fans, the competition, the fact that I had this drive inside Me to try and be the best. And that drive, that fire, it never went away. I went home to spend time with my sons. I went home because I wanted to spend as much time with Austin as I could. I wanted life. But that desire, that need for competition, and that never went away. In fact, it got stronger.”

“And to be honest, I feel like I’m wasting my breath. I’m trying to teach you a lesson that you simply cannot fathom. You can’t understand it. You got given a contract when you graduated, and you say that you’ve tried to earn that, but you really haven’t. You turn up to work if you win a match you think it’s the greatest thing ever and if you lose you ignore it just like everyone else. Because you don’t learn anything.”

“So, I’m going to teach you”

“Just like I have been doing a Wolfslair. See, I’ve been teaching a whole bunch of young students coming through. I have a certain skill for it. But when it comes to me wanting to teach someone Harper, I don’t cuddle them and carry them and pat them on the head and tell them that everything is going to be alright. I beat my lessons into them. And they come out on the other side stronger, better, smarter, and ready to take on the world. But you? I don’t think you have it inside you to be in this business. I don’t think you have the same fire in the same drive that is needed to be at the top.”

Alicia moves along and looks over the opposite side toward the pool. She smiles as Austin plays with her sons as well as his children, Austin's sister and her son also enjoying the cruise and the time away from New York. This is what Alicia fights for.

”Your main argument against nepotism doesn’t really make a lot of sense either. People like you need to work harder. I know that because I knew I needed to work harder. Zoey knew she needed to work harder anyone who has relatives or friends who they’ve grown close to in this business needs to work harder when they have someone who would preceed them. But you took it one step closer. You want to assume that Christian and Mark had their eye on you when you were graduating Team Hero Academy? Really? We have so many young hungry stars sitting at Wolfslair…”

“You know how many of those young hungry kids have been signed by this company? Without any prior experience where they set other companies on fire or show what they could do? None. Zero. Because we don’t coddle them and bring them into a major company before they’re ready.”

“And that is from Wolfslair. A gym that has been responsible for some of the best this company has ever seen. Myself, Austin James Mercer, Alex Jones, Johanna Krieger, Sierra Williams, Miles Kasey, Finn Whelan, Lachlan Kane. The list goes on. And as much as you want to believe that Hero Academy is some great gym that produces legends and Schitt gold the truth is that it doesn’t. The only reason people care about that place is because Roxi and Keira run it…”

“But tell me Harper, who from that gym has ever done anything worthwhile? Go ahead bring some names oh wait.”

“You can’t. And you are trying to be the first one and that’s fine. I don’t like how you got here, I don’t like your attitude, and I don’t like that people seem to think you’re going to be something when you have shown nothing to anyone that proves it. And you’re making the same mistakes now. Sitting there talking about how you want to be a new hero in this company. How? You can’t even admit to yourself that maybe the way you got in here was a little bit shady. You can’t even admit to yourself that I’m still just as good as I’ve always been. Instead, you want to throw accusations at me like I’m the same as Mercedes Vargas. You want to tear people down instead of lift them up when I have done nothing but try and lift the division.”

“So, falls count anywhere, summer xxxtreme, you, the young hungry rookie who thinks they can do no wrong, Me the grizzled veteran who seems to have a stick up her ass. I know the role I have to play. I know that some people think that I’m a monster, but the truth is Harper? I’m a teacher and I’m trying to teach you a lesson. I just hope that the people around you haven’t poisoned your mind to the possibility of actually fucking learning something. So shut your mouth, take your lesson, and then thank me..”