[Sitting outside on the veranda of a cafe, Mercedes Vargas hides behind a newspaper. She lowers it to reveal her wearing a sunhat to cover her hair. Across from her is Janet the Makeup Lady, a glass still half full of pina colada in her hand.]
Mercedes: It's no use trying to hide my shame. If I had to do this, it had to on my own, just not now.
Janet the Makeup Lady: I think it's a new look for you, get to see how the other half lives. Now, come on, Merce, take off the hat.
[Janet goes to remove the hat, but I swat her hand away and give her a murderous look.]
Mercedes: I'm not going to tell you again. Quit it, or you're going home with one less hand tonight.
Janet the Makeup Lady: It can't be that bad.
Mercedes: I'm too angry right now to go into details at the moment, but that match with Harper should have been mine.
Janet the Makeup Lady: EVERYONE is talking about it. Harper didn't deserve that, if you asked me. She can't seem to catch a break.
Mercedes: Really, Janet. I thought you had my bsck. Just when you know who your friends are.
Janet the Makeup Lady: And what about Jessie talking smack about you?
Mercedes: It's Jessie Salco. When was the last time anyone took anything she said at face value? If I were her, I'd stay retired.
Janet the Makeup Lady: You realize Harper wants to face you at December 2 Dismember? It seems she don't like you. At all.
Mercedes: That hasn't changed.
Janet the Makeup Lady: It's like you and Jessie all over again. Aren't you two ever going to get along? Life is too short to be holding grudges.
Mercedes: Were you watching the same show? You saw what she did to me earlier when Jessie got in my face. Harper got her payback. I got mine. So we're even.
Janet the Makeup Lady: Even though you lost to Harper two weeks ago? I think it's time you let this go, Mercedes. It's not healthy.
Mercedes: What would you know about healthy? Anyway, I got Julianna DiMaria to worry about.
Janet the Makeup Lady: Aren't you excited?
Mercedes: About challenging for the Bombshell Championship again? Yeah. I can't decide between my first go or my 22nd. Seriously, I've been ready and everything.
Janet the Makeup Lady: How good are you?
Mercedes: I don't know, I'm not sure. But it's going to be fun to find out.
[Fade.]
Blog: Almighty Firesemana del 19 al 26 de noviembre de 2023 So not everything has gone according to plan in 2023. Once again I've lost more matches than I won. I've come up short in a few number one contender matches. At least three times have slipped through my fingers. Getting winds on Control or pay-per-view is another story entirely. The last time I won on Climax Control, I beat Selena Zdunich. That was back in mid-July.
But Thanksgiving is upon us, and it's usually a time to be grateful. I have a lot to be grateful for. When you're a two-time Hall of Famer, how can you not. No matter how much I want to avoid it, time happens to everyone. Yes, even a international superstar like me. I've been in SCW for ten years now and despite what I've accomplished in my career, I've had to weather the storm, rolled through the punches, and watched the endless conga line of girls walk through this company with some not even lasting barely a month. It's a sad reality, but I never let it be my reality.
Something to be grateful for.
Harper Mason should be the most grateful these past few weeks. She got not one, but two wins in back-to-back weeks because of me, and the only reason why she didn't spend the night lying in ICU in some dingy hospital somewhere in Flagstaff, Arizona is by the grace of God and because I'm a nice person. I don't know what her idiot cousin has been telling her, because like the movie Groundhog Day, Harper keeps living the same outcome over and over again. I guess that's life when you're related to Jessie Salco.
Anyway... When I glanced at this weekend's card, I was shocked to find my name in the main event – wait, is that a frown on your face or are you happy to see me? - because there's a lot of girls on the roster who would have killed to be challenging for the Bombshell Championship. A match with one of the upstart talents in the division is an opportunity anyone would and should take. But, hey, I'm not complaining. Depending on who you ask, either I just got lucky or the short end of the straw. A lot of people are probably wondering how I got this match, that I don't belong in this match, and even if by some miracle of miracles I end up having my hand raised, that I don't deserve a title, but you know something? I don't book the matches, so I can't say it's my problem.
I couldn't pass this up, and it's not because my opponent is coming off her first successful defense or that I wasn't successful in my last match outing, but because there needs to be closure, don't you think? Let's face it, save for maybe Courtney, very few woman has been able to give Julianna that challenge in 2023. Week after week, she ended up disappointed after each victory, and every week the fans were left wondering who would end her reign.
I know what I'm in for at Climax Control, another tough match with one of the future stars of the Bombshells division and while we have never met before, Julianna knows I'm going to push her to the limit so I expect this match to be more of a heavyweight fight. I don't have a problem where our match is placed on the card - I just want to be the one who ends Julianna's streak. Honestly, I'm was in no hurry for another title match, but I'm going to make Julianna work to protect her reign.
Julianna has had quite the few months. Being unpinned for five months-plus is impressive – no where near to my 14-month record – but impressive nonetheless, and Courtney was her only real threat. I get the feeling that I won't be the favorite in our match, but that's alright, that's okay. I've gotten used to the underdog label by now, and I've managed to open a few eyes and drop a few jaws along the way. It's what I do. I'm not called “Big Match Mercy” for no reason.
Some people feel I don't deserve to be in this title match to begin with, others see me as a warmup for Julianna before December 2 Dismember and some say I should be desperate ahead of our match because of my history in previous world title matches. I say a world championship reign is long overdue. I've got the ability, I've got the talent and I've got the drive. It's up to me to put it all together and end the night with my hand raised in victory.
There will be those who criticize my career. There will be those who question if I'm ready to be the hood ornament of the women's division again. There will be those who doubt how long I'll stay at the top. And then there will be me ready to prove them wrong.
Like I said, it's Thanksgiving Week, and I have a lot to be thankful for, but come Sunday, you will be thanking me.~~~
"Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
"Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God."
[Clock ticking. A sewn-in black satin ribbon page marks an opened red-letter bible. A candle burning next to it. Father McCarthy, a bespeckled man who took his devotion serious than anyone had a right to be, recites a passage of Scripture.]
Father McCarthy: Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of hea --
[A proud, pouty tone causes the middle-aged clergyman to look up, annoyed, from the text.]
Mercedes: Father, I need a favor.
Father McCarthy: Yes, my child, what is
now?
Mercedes: I have a friend of a friend who knows a friend who is getting married and they need someone to officiate the wedding. Luckily for me, I have the best person for the job.
[The priest sighs while shaking his head.]
Father McCarthy: I'm sorry, Mercedes, but I can't. You'll have to find someone else, I'm afraid.
Mercedes: But why not? You've been doing this for years. Aren't you supposed to be doing the Lord's work?
Father McCarthy: No, I think I would be just doing your work. Besides, I'm stepping away from ordaining weddings and for a good reason.
Mercedes: It can't be that bad.
Father McCarthy: Want to bet?
[FLASHBACK. Texas. Inside a quaint chapel. Father McCarthy dressed in regal attire. He leads the bride and groom in exchanging wedding vows.]
GROOM: Ooh, my little pretty one, my pretty one.
When you gonna give me some time, Sharona?
Ooh, you make my motor run, my motor run.
Got it comin' off of the line, Sharona. Never gonna stop, give it up, such a dirty mind. I always get it up for the touch of the younger kind. My, my, my, ay, ah, wooh! M-m-m-my Sharona.
[Father McCarthy gives a bristled response as he turns to the bride.]
Father McCarthy: Now for the bride.
Bride: Um, wow. How can I top The Knacks?
[Flustered, the bride turns to Father McCarthy, who urges her on to continue.]
Bride: Dear Bradley, I promise to be your co-pilot, your navigator, to take you in sickness and in health, regardless of the dangerous stuff I put you through.
Father McCarthy: Wonderful. And at this time, if there is anyone who cannot see why these two should not be in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace.
[The camera pans to the crowd, most of which has their hand raised. Father McCarthy points at one woman in the front row.]
Father McCarthy: Yes, we'll start with you.
Woman: Uh, hi. My name is Tabitha, I'm the bride's roommate. Sharona, you barely know this man. You just met him in the IHop commercial. You two have no compatibility and you yell at each other at most things. Don't make this mistake.
The bride and groom say their peace.
Bride: Tabby, there's nothing wrong with IHOP. Stop being so jelly belly.
Groom: Tabitha, think of it this way. You're not losing a roommate, you're gaining a roommate.
Father McCarthy: Yes, we'll take the woman to the right.
Woman #2: Yes, Ethan. It's your wife, Lola. L-O-L-A. Lola. Real quick, why are you throwing our marriage away? Think of the children.
Groom: Your concerns are noted. Also, the alimony and child support says you have nothing to worry about.
Father McCarthy: There seems to be a line forming in the aisle. Settle down, we'll try to get all of you. Okay, sir in the rather loud suit.
Man: Yes, I'm the father of the bride. I just to say this. Sharona, why are you with this man? Your mother and I didn't approve of this.
Bride: Daddy, don't you DARE ruin this for me!.
Man: Don't say I didn't warn you.
Father McCarthy: Yes, to the gentleman wearing the headset.
Man #2: Ethan, it's Coach Adams. We won the state championship two years in a row. You know you have one more year of eligibility to join the team. What do you say to a three-peat?
Groom: Well, gee, Coach. I don't know how to say this any more clear: Yeah, no. No. Absolutely not. There's no chance. It's gonna be a no from me. A hard no. Definite no. And, uh, how do I say, HELL NO!
Father McCarthy: Well, then. I, too, would like to add my objective. By the power vested in me by the Church, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now seal your vows with a kiss.
[END FLASHBACK]
Mercedes: Oh, you poor thing.
Father McCarthy: I knew I should have taken up acting when I had the chance!
[***Fade***]
~~~
Present Day ♦ S A N T A M O N I C A, C A L I F O R N I A[REC•] [The scene opens up as we see the hands and partial arms of someone struggling with a tripod. After a few minutes, the person steps back, reaching out to adjust the device before looking back at the camera with a sidelong glance. Mercedes Vargas waves back at us. The Argentine is at the Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica, California. In the background is the entrance to Frank Gehry's Santa Monica Place.]
"You know, Jessie,, after Crystal Caldwell took her retirement from Sin City Wrestling all those months ago, I thought for sure you would be following her out the door. You lost your match at Violent Conduct, you lost the Bombshell Roulette Championship. I thought we would never hear or see your face again. But as it turns out, you're still here, plugging along, keeping your head above water in SCW and that's something to be admired. Now you took your cousin under your wing and you've found your voice. On Twitter, you're claiming about injustice being served because poor little Harper has become a punching bag lately. It's just too bad that the last two weeks haven't been memorable, despite the cheap wins she's gotten the past two weeks, but I digress. What I find comical, even hilarious, is the fact that your cousin wants a match with me. Thing is, Jessie, for as long as we’ve been in SCW together and the fact that we've had lengthy careers, I thought you of all people were smarter than this.
"Harper challenged me to a match at December 2 Dismember. She wants my answer? She will have my answer the same time you and the world will - this weekend at Climax Control 379.
"But, see, my attention won't be solely focused on Harper. Because that same weekend, though, I have more important matters worth my time and attention: Julianna DiMaria and the Bombshell Championship. A championship that's been eluding me for awhile now and it's certainly something I'm not readily to admit nor am I happy about."
[Mercedes remains calm, eyes steady on the camera lens. Clearly the shame and embarrassment of the outcome of the tag match two weeks ago hasn't sat well with her. With a heavy sigh, she looks up again, shaking her head.]
"These past few weeks, months, years only serve as setbacks to setup my comeback. I've had my ups and down, successes and failures, but I never let failure get the last word. I plan on walking out of Climax Control as a winner, because that's what I am. No excuses, no exceptions."
[Mercedes looks back at the panoramic view of the Los Angeles skyline before looking back at the camera.]
"I've been called many things. Some of them were nice, others not so much. Depending on who you ask, some call me determined. Most called me obsessed. And then there are those who tend to look at me as being past my prime, including Julianna, and that's fine. If she thinks I'm washed up, that I'm past my prime, I'll be more than happy to prove her wrong and take back my mantle. And if it means going through the new flavor of the week who hasn't tasted a defeat for a over a few months, well, guess who's about to end up on my checklist?
"I've perservered through all kinds of matches and opponents, injuries and setbacks, and the stigma that followed me when I was a member of one of the most infamous stables in the company. It's any wonder why I'm still here after that episode. Disrespect, I can live with. But as for you? For you, Julianna, it's another story. It doesn't matter if I speak to you in English, Spanish, or a mixture of both, it's all universal: You're only getting started.
Oh, sure, you're on en fuego right now. You're stacking up wins right now, taking everyone's best shot."
[She holds a finger in a wait-a-minute gesture.]
"There is just one problem. Every opponent is different, and no week is ever the same. You know the pressure is getting to you. It's why you get me this weekend before the next pay-per-view. Will you still make the card? Probably. Will you still be champion by then? That's what we're going to find out.
"I bet the view looks nice up there, sitting in that ivory tower. What you seem to forget is all it takes is one loss and everything collapses. Come Sunday, I'm going to be the force of nature that's going to cause that tower to crumble.
"Jenga!
"And, when that happens, mamita, the world will be forced to witness everything you worked for disappear just...like...that."
[Mercedes snaps her fingers to underscore each word.]
"There will be those who criticize my career. There will be those who question if I'm ready to be the hood ornament of the women's division again. There will be those who doubt how long I'll stay at the top. And then there will be me ready to prove them wrong."
[Looking deadset into the camera lens, her voice drops to a whisper though her words hold conviction behind them. She pauses, mostly for dramatic effect.]
"Estar preparado para lo peor, esperar lo mejor."
"Prepare for the worst, hope for the best."[Mercedes stares menacing into the camera. She lowers her voice, barely a whisper.]
"Y que la suerte está siempre en su favor."
"And may the odds be ever in your favor."[With that, Mercedes walks off, but the camera stays on the picturesque view of the boardwalk as our scene fades.]
