Air Canada Flight 576 Las Vegas to Montreal leaves from Mcarran International Airport at 11:10AM on Saturday, January 23. Outside of the airport, our heroes Aleksei Koji, Trevor Irons, and Max Burke hop out of the Party Horde bus in a hurry.
Max Burke: Come on, you clowns! We’re late!
Trevor Irons: Breathe Max. All is well. Everything is aligned.
Max Burke: What? What the heck is up with you?
Aleksei Koji: Max... relax. We’ve got plenty of time. We’re going to make it. I called ahead.
Max Burke: And you trust that phone call Aleksei? This is an airport... I don’t trust these idiots.
Aleksei Koji: Easy Max. Don’t say bomb, and use your Canadian charm. They’ll push us through fast, and we’ll be done in no time.
Trevor Irons: Nothing is “up” Max. I just see things clearly now. You just need to have faith.
Max Burke: Are you high?
Max and Aleksei shoot a look at each other, questioning Trevor’s newfound enlightenment. They rush the gate, bags in hand and passes the ticket over to the airline agent.
Max Burke: I’m so sorry we’re cutting it so close ma’am. Our driver somehow got lost on the way to the airport. I apologize.
The agent looks over their passports and tickets, and waves them through.
Max Burke: Thank you SO much. You’re amazing!
The agent smiles at Max, and scurries them on their way. Max looks over at Aleksei, and Trevor.
Max Burke: Whew. That was close.
Aleksei Koji: Are you kidding? You charmed the panties off her with your nice guy Canadian charm. You suave mother...
Trevor Irons: Hey! Watch your mouth!
Max chuckles as he ponders the innocent flirting that he just excellently perfected to get them through without a hitch. The three amigos board the plane, and find their seats with little trouble. Max and Aleksei take their seats, and Trevor takes a seat in the aisle on the floor. Trevor crosses his legs and sits in a classic meditation pose.
Max Burke: Uh, Trev? Seat’s up here bud.
Aleksei Koji: Yeah, Trev. I don’t think they’ll dig you plunked down on the floor like that.
Trevor Irons: Guys, can you give me a couple of minutes? I need to center myself.
Aleksei snickers, as Max just rolls his eyes.
Max Burke: Trev, don’t blame us when we say we told ya so.
Aleksei Koji: You got that right Max. Hurry up and center yourself before you kicked off the flight.
Trevor ignores his teammates, and breathes deeply over and over. Eyes shut, total focus is what Trevor is currently at. So much so, that he does not notice one of the airline attendants come up from behind him.
Max Burke: Hey Trev, you’re in the lady’s way. You might want to snap out of it before she calls security to snap you out of it.
Trevor continues to ignore his partner. The attendant looks at Max and Aleksei. They simply shrug. Max motions to the attendant to give him a minute. He pops out of his seat, and crouches in front of his partner. He snaps his fingers in front of his partner’s face.
Max Burke: Yo. Earth to Trev. Yo!!! Get your ass up!
Trevor slowly opens his eyes, and looks at Max blankly.
Trevor Iron: Yes?
Max Burke: Lady would you like you to get in your seat, so she can do her job. We need to get this bird off the ground, but we can’t until your cuckoo ass gets in his seat.
Aleksei Koji: Ha! Well played Max. Come on, Trevor.
Trevor Irons: Apologies ma’am. I’ll return to my seat now. I just needed to prepare for the long flight ahead.
Attendant: That’s okay, sir. I enjoy yoga, and meditation myself.
She smiles sheepishly at Trevor, and walks towards the back of the plane..
Max Burke: Look at you, you sly dog. Get after that. I guess I need to start doing this is meditation crap. I’ll teach ya YRG, if you teach me how to meditate.
Trevor Irons: YRG?
Max Burke: What? You’ve never heard of it?
Aleksei Koji: Come on Trev, it’s a phenomenon!
Trevor Irons: Never heard of it.
Max Burke: It’s Yoga For Real Guys! An old retired wrestler came up with it. It’s wicked. It’s like a mix of yoga and physio. Takes away the aches, and pains. I love it. I’ve been doing it for a week or so now, and it’s crazy but I’m already seeing a difference. I’m taking my training to a whole new level with YRG, and I want you to join in. So, let’s make a deal... you teach me your meditation stuff, and you’ll work out with me doing the YRG. Deal?
Trevor Irons: Deal.
Max Burke: Good deal bro. I think it’s really going to help. Now, that we’ve got Casper and Goth too we really need to focus. But, I got to admit, Goth needs to be repackaged. The whole dark and scary goth gimmick went out in the 90’s. Talk about holding on to past accomplishments.
Aleksei Koji: Max, do not take him lightly. He is an accomplished champion.
Max Burke: I’m not taking him lightly boss. I’m just saying his gimmick sucks. He might as well go sparkle somewhere else.
Aleksei Koji: What? He’s not a damn Twilight vampire... he’s goth. Goth is goth. Both gimmicks are lame though.
Max Burke: He needs to wash off the damn face paint, and stop living in the past. Goth is lame. Are we supposed to be scared of white makeup and leather? Like seriously? He’s a trooper to be able to pull off that lameass gimmick. I know the Netherlands love their goth and metal gimmicks, but he’s in the states now. He needs to ditch the gimmick, and get down to business.
Aleksei Koji: So, what’s your gameplan with Goth? Remember, what we’re focusing on.
Max Burke: Yeah, boss. Break him down. Go after the left knee, and his back. It was “years” ago, but I know full well how bad that shit lingers. I’m going to break him, and send him back to those scuzzy metal clubs in the Netherlands.
Aleksei Koji: You two are the one true team in this match. Divide and conquer all of them. Cut the ring off. Use your tags. Go after their weaknesses. It’s always been said the best defense is a strong offense. That is your focus. Offense. You two are the so-called underdogs, but the people who say that don’t know any better. Now, both of you get some rest. It’s a long ass flight. Get some sleep.
Max Burke & Trevor Irons [in unison]: YES SIR!
Max and Trevor mockingly salute their manager and confidant. Max and Trevor lean back in their seats, and pop in their ear buds. Both close their eyes as commanded.
Will the Young Lions new focus lead them to success? Can Max put up with Trevor’s teaching methods? Can Trevor handle Yoga For Real Guys? Find out next time as the Young Lions pounce Canada eh!
