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161
Supercard Archives / Re: Roulette Championship: Finn Whelan (c) v Max Burke v Bill Barthart
« on: May 04, 2022, 08:52:32 AM »
* SENOR VINNIE AND PETE THE CACTUS USED BY PERMISSION OF GERRIT *

A TRIPLE THREAT MATCH IS TWICE THE FUN

Narrator:Bill Barnhart has fun using a famous advertising slogan when he is involved in a Triple Threat match. The slogan was for Doublemint Gum and the slogan went DOUBLE YOUR PLEASURE. . .DOUBLE YOUR FUN…WITH DOUBLE GOOD, DOUBLE GOOD, DOUBLEMINT GUM. Bill told me he’s ready to have double the fun defeating Finn Whelan and Max Burke to again become Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion.

IRIS AND PETE THE CACTUS

The scene opens at the hotel room of Bill and Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, located near the Ano Liosia Olympic Sports Call in Athens, Greece. Bill hears music coming from the bedroom where Iris has been relaxing. He thinks maybe Iris is having a video chat with Pete the Cactus so he asks Bea to come with him to check on what Iris is doing. When the two walk into the room they see Iris with her butt toward her laptop computer and she’s twerking to the song SHAKE YOUR BOOTY by KC and The Sunshine Band. On the computer screen we see Pete the Cactus with a huge smile on his face, with a Margarita in one hand, and a cigar in his other hand, and he is enjoying watching Iris twerk.

Bea:  Iris? What in the hell is going on here? Are you two sexting each other using video calling? Iris you stop twerking! Pete you need to end this video call now! I’m going to have a talk with Senor Vinnie about how you are corrupting Iris!

Pete the Cactus:  !!! *** ### (Interpretation:  We’re just having a bit of innocent fun. You need to chill out! Vinnie won’t do anything to me!)

Bill:  Pete you don’t talk to Bea in that manner. I’m also going to talk with Vinnie about your behavior today.  However in all fairness to both of you I do feel that you and Iris share equal blame in this incident. Iris you could have said no but you didn’t. That’s all for today Iris. End the video call, shut down your computer, and you stay in the bedroom until we come and unlock the door and let you out.

Iris:  Moan. . .Whine. . .Snort  (Interpretation:  Daddy Bill and Mommy Iris always take my fun away from me.)

Iris turns off her laptop and she jumps up on the bed and curls up next to the pillow. Iris sighs heavily as Daddy Bill and Mommy Bea close the bedroom door so she cannot get out.

Bea:  I hate to be hard on Iris but I don’t think she has the reasoning abilities that Pete has so I have to hold Pete more responsible for what happened. I feel Pete takes advantage of Iris.

Bill:  I’ll talk to Senor Vinnie when I get a chance. I want to finish airing my comments for the Roulette Championship match.

A TRIPLE THREAT MATCH IS DOUBLE THE FUN

Bill begins his comments on his Roulette Championship match at Into the Void XI.

Bill:  Thanks for joining me today. As you know I had my rematch for the Roulette Championship at Climax Control 330 against Finn Whelan. Well, Finn, what happened in that match? I know you’re gonna try to bullshit everyone into believing you’re the victim and not the perpetrator but I know differently. What happened is that you arranged to have Kayla Richards run in on our match and interfere to cause me a loss but you tried to make it look like you were not involved in the scam. Well it didn’t work because I didn’t buy into your scheme.

Bea:  After Kayla Richards pulled that crap during your match and she attacked me I hope there’s a match between me and her soon so I can enact revenge on her.

Bill:  So, Finn, we continued to fight it out and both of us fell through the table at the same time and the Referee declared the match a No Decision. Christian Underwood stepped in and declared that decision a travesty and he decided to include me in the Roulette Championship match at Into the Void XI.

Bill gives a thumbs up into the camera.

Bill:  Let me tell you how it is Finn. You thought you were going to come into this Roulette Championship defense match and only get defeated by Max Burke. The decision by Management to ensure I wasn’t cheated at Climax Control 330 have now made this match at Into the Void XI a Triple Threat. I always find Triple Threat matches to be double the fun as I get to destroy two opponents instead of one. I use the slogan from Doublemint Gum which is DOUBLE YOUR PLEASURE. . .DOUBLE YOUR FUN. . .WITH DOUBLE GOOD. . .DOUBLE GOOD. . .DOUBLEMINT GUM. For the benefit of you and Max I’m informing you that I’m pumped up and excited about this match as I’m going to have double the fun beating down, destroying, and humiliate you as I defeat both you and walk away as the Roulette Champion. You two are not going to change the outcome of our match as I’ve already decided I’m winning. I’ve modified the Doublemint Gum jingle to fit me and our upcoming match. It goes like this. . .DOUBLE YOUR PLEASURE. . .DOUBLE YOUR FUN. . .WITH DOUBLE BILL. . .DOUBLE BILL…BECAUSE HE’S THE ONE!

Bea:  Tell Finn and Max what we talked about before coming on camera.

I DON’T CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS

Bill:  I’ll start with comments to you Finn. You only defeated me for the Roulette Championship due to us having a twelve part match that ended in a 6-6 tie. Then they added one additional item and you happened to trip over your own feet and get a cheap win over me. In my way of seeing things a cheap accidental win is a travesty in the sport of wrestling and I’m here to fix that travesty. You were unable to defeat me a second time as the Referee made a decision of a draw in the match. A draw doesn’t equate into a win Finn. It means you couldn’t get the job done against me. You failed to get an honest and legal win over me twice but that crap ends at Into the Void XI as I’ll not allow that to happen again. I’ll get the legal win and walk away as Roulette Champion.

Bill does a fist pump toward the camera.

Bill:  Now I come to you Max. From what I’ve heard it appears you won a match that qualified you to face the Roulette Champion at Into the Void XI. I haven’t been paying attention to your career, or your performance in Sin City Wrestling, as I don’t see you as a viable opponent. Let me put it as straight up and honest as I can. I don’t know much about you and I don’t care to know anything about you. I don’t care who the hell you are or who you think you are. I don’t care where you come from or if you really come from that place or you’re just spreading lies. I don’t care what your moves, maneuvers, holds, and other items are that you use during wrestling matches. It doesn’t matter what you call them or what they consists of as I can counter everything and I don’t care about you! I also don’t give a shit who you who you think you are, who you know, or what you eat for breakfast. All I care about is whupping your sorry ass, and that of Finn Whelan, and walking away as Roulette Champion. Want to try to change my mind? Then give it your best shot. I assure you that your best shot will fail.

Bill provides a huge grin into the camera.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bill:  Finn if you hire Kayla Richards to interfere in our match again I’ll not only mess you up I’ll ensure Kayla gets messed up by Bea. As for you Max? I’m tired of wasting my breath talking to you and about you. I’ll do the rest of my talking in the ring with my wrestling abilities at Into the Void XI.

Bea:  Oh, Bill, I assure you if I get a match against Kayla I’ll destroy her and thrill the crowd in doing so.

Bill:  Fin. . .Max. . .I heard they installed a sign at the arena where Into the Void XI is being held. The sign is posted just before you get to the wrestling ring. With this sign posted you two won’t be allowed past the sign to get into the ring. Har har har!!!

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bea:  Nice one Bill.

Bill:  The bullshit you two have been spewing forth leading up to our match is just that. . .BULLSHIT!!! And to prove it I used a Bullshit Meter to determine how much of what you two have been saying is honest, or semi-honest, or bullshit and here is what the Bullshit Meter detected concerning your comments.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bea:  You always keep me amused with your comments Bill.

Bill:  Trust me Bea I’ll keep Finn and Max “AMUSED” while I’m beating the crap out of them!

Bea tells the camera person they are done with their comments for today and the camera  person calls into the Network and the Network cuts their feed and our screen does dark.


162
Climax Control Archives / I'M TAKING BACK MY ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP
« on: April 27, 2022, 08:05:59 AM »
I’M TAKING BACK MY ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP

Narrator:  Bill currently holds the honor of being the third longest reigning Roulette Champion in Sin City Wrestling. Bill told me he is determined to earn back the Roulette Championship and this time earn the honor of the longest reigning Roulette Champion in Sin City Wrestling.

TAKING BACK WHAT IS RIGHTFULLY MINE

When the scene switches we see Bill Barnhart, Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, walking around in Lesbos, Greece. The camera person assigned to them travels with them wherever they go and they keep them in focus with their camera. Today we see Bill is casually dressed in blue jeans, a black pullover shirt, and black sneakers. Bea is also casually dressed but she is wearing black jeans, a white pullover shirt, and white sneakers. Iris? You know. . .the usual attire. . .a pink diamond studded dog collar.

Bill:  I wish to thank the camera person for accepting this assignment to air my comments for my upcoming rematch for the Roulette Championship against Finn Whelan.

Bea:  It’s nice to see how popular Bill is no matter where in the world we travel for wrestling events.

Bill, Bea, and Iris continue walking down the street stopping occasionally to look into shop windows to see if there are items they may wish to purchase as souvenirs. Not finding anything yet they continue their walk around the town and continue with their comments.

Bill:  Finn. . .it is extremely appropriate that Climax Control 330 is called the GOING HOME show, which leads us to INTO THE VOID XI, because I’m going to soundly defeat you and send you home as the loser and former Roulette Champion then I’ll be the one to defend the Roulette Championship against Max Burke at INTO THE VOID XI.

Bea:  As always I’ll be in Bill’s corner as his Manager to ensure this match is fair and free of interference and cheating.

Bill:  Finn I know that you know the facts but I’m still going to present them for clarification. I’m the third longest reigning Roulette Champion in Sin City Wrestling. Just because you got a lucky break in our last match doesn’t equate into you defeating me and retaining the Roulette Championship at Climax Control 330. You can get a Voodoo woman to put a curse on me but that won’t get you the win. You can hire all the interference you want but that won’t get you the win. Even if all the planets, solar systems, stars, and galaxies in the Universe were to be perfectly aligned it wouldn’t be enough to get you successful Roulette Championship defense over me at Climax Control 330. If that’s not clear enough for you to fully understand then you are a moron.

Bill, Bea, and Iris turn the corner and stop in front of another shop. Bill notices something inside the shop so he goes in to check on the item with the cameraman following him. When Bill gets to the item he realizes it is a Bill Barnhart action figure with the Roulette Championship belt around his waist. Bill asks the clerk the price and even though it is very expensive Bill gladly pays for the item. Bill returns to Bea and Iris who are waiting on the sidewalk and he shows them his find.

Bill:  Look at what I found! Here in Greece I’m a fan favorite. This is going to be a great addition to our home.

Bea:  Yeah it will!

Bill, Bea, and Iris continue walking around and they come to a small park with a pond where ducks are swimming around. Bill and Bea take a seat on a bench to continue with their comments while Iris sniffs around and occasionally chases a duck.

Bill:  So, Finn, many wrestlers like you believe that just because you step into a wrestling ring that automatically makes you a wrestler. It doesn’t just happen as most people think. It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to be at the top in the sport of wrestling. In our previous match we had one of the most interesting and brutal Roulette Rules matches in the history of the sport of wrestling and you happened to get lucky and got the tie-breaker pinfall for the win. That doesn’t mean you dominated me as the match was going my way until you got a lucky break. Stuff like that happens but your luck has run out and I’ll win our upcoming match and again become Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion.

Bea:  Finn there’s a saying that goes sitting in a Church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than sitting in your garage makes you a car. The same concept applies to the sport of wrestling. Stepping into a wrestling ring doesn’t make you a wrestler any more than sitting in your garage makes you a car.

WHO YOU GONNA BELIEVE?

Bill:  So, Finn, who are you going to believe? Are you going to believe that you’re actually a better wrestler than me or are you going to believe the truth which is I’m a way better wrestler than you will ever be?

Bea:  Bill you need to run down the list of previous opponents who thought they were better than you because they were bigger than you. And for you, Finn, you need to realize if Bill was able to take out numerous opponents larger than he was then you’re not going to be able to get by Bill again in this match.

Bill:  Let me run down the list of four larger opponents I’ve taken out so you know that with us being the same height and close to the same weight me taking you out will be easy. I didn’t use the names of the wrestlers but I used symbols to describe them.

ONE:  I took on King Kong and beat him down to size then sold him to an Organ Grinder to use as his Organ Grinder monkey.

TWO:  I took on Godzilla and beat him down to size then he ended up getting a job promoting the Geico insurance company.

THREE:  I took on a raging bull and beat him down into a dinner of steaks and ribs.

FOUR:  I took on a Kraken and beat him down to size and had Calamari for dinner.

Bill:  So, Finn, if I was able to accomplish all of that dealing with opponents who were much larger and heavier than me, and much larger and heavier than you could ever hope to be, what the hell gives you the idea you can defeat me in our upcoming match?

Bea:  Wishful thinking and hoping for a miracle doesn’t win matches Finn.

Bill and Bea burst out laughing while Iris looks at both of them and rolls her eyes. Iris then continues sniffing around and occasionally giving a side glance to one of the ducks.

THE BOTTOM LINE

Bill:  Finn I doubt if you remember a television show from the late 1970’s, as you have the attention span of about five seconds, but rest assured I’ll keep you informed concerning this television show. The show as a comedy named DIFF’RENT STROKES where Gary Coleman played a character named Arnold and Todd Bridged played his brother Willis. The catchphrase on the show was when Willis said something that Arnold thought was outrageous, or that he was not able to be understand, he blurted out the catchphrase which was WHAT CHOO’ TALKIN’ ‘BOUT WILLIS???  Well, Finn, you’re talking so much shit that is outrageous concerning our match that I’m responding with WHAT CHOO’ TALKIN’ ‘BOUT WHELAN??? Har har har!!!

Bea:  The problem you have, Finn, is that you equate one lucky win in a Roulette Championship match where there were twelve parts to the match. You happened to win the tie-breaker fall in the match but that doesn’t mean you dominated Bill in the match. Yes the match went back and forth but anyone you ask about that match will tell you Bill should have won but sometimes fate raises their head and causes something to happen.

Bill:  Speaking of fate raising their head fate will again raise their head but this time in my favor. That means I will walk into the Supercard INTO THE VOID XI as the defending Roulette Champion.

Bea:  Please relate to the viewer the comparison you have concerning how Finn won the tie-breaker item in your Roulette Championship match.

Bill:  Finn our match was a twelve part match that we came out even with it. They added a final stipulation and you managed to get the win in that final stipulation. It was an accident on your part Finn. You literally got a win for being a joke of a wrestler. Your win can be compared with this example. It was like two people shooting at ducks with shotguns in a competition with a total of twelve ducks to shoot at and they end up with six ducks each. So they toss in one final duck and whoever shoots down that duck is the winner. Say one of the people in the tie-breaker accidentally drops his gun and it fires and accidentally hits the duck and kills it? Does that mean they were the better shooter in the competition? Not only NO but HELL NO!!! That’s exactly how you won the Roulette Championship match against me Finn. You failed to take me out the entire match then you tripped over your own feet and got a cheap win. I’m coming at you at Climax Control 300 to fix that cheap accidentally win you got.

Bea:  That’s telling him how it is Bill.

Bill:  Finn you need to know why the two of us are in the Main Event match for Climax Control 330. It’s not because you’re in the match. It’s not because you’re currently the Roulette Champion. The reason we are in the Main Event  is that I’m in the match and I’m a hell of a larger draw that you’ll ever be. I also wish to inform you of the duty you’ll be performing after I defeat you and once again I become the Roulette Champion. The janitorial crew will clean up the arena with you after I destroy you in our match. That’s all you’ll be worth when I get done destroying you. They’ll use you as a broom. They’ll use you as a cleaning rag. They’ll use you as a buffer for the floors. Oh, man, that’s gonna be some hilarious stuff. Well. . .hilarious for everyone but you Finn. Har har har!!!

Bea informs the camera person they will be leaving the park and head back in the direction of their hotel and that Bill will give them comments along the way. As they get back into the main street area Bill and Bea continue presenting comments for the enjoyment of the viewers.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bea:  We had a nice day today Bill. You laid down the facts and truth to Finn and we both got to watch Iris try to intimidate ducks.

Bill>  Iris does have something in common with ducks. Both Iris and the ducks waddle when they walk.

Iris looks up at Daddy Bill and snorts at him for making a joke about her.

Bill:  I want everyone watching to know that just because I’m in the Main Event doesn’t mean I’m going to drag the match out just to make it a long match. Maybe some of the fans, and some of the other wrestlers, will call me out when I win quickly and make the match a short one, but my objective here is to win the match, and the Roulette Championship, as quickly as possible. There’s never a need to play games and drag a match out just to have a longer match.

Bea:  Whether it is a very short match or a long one the end result is still the same that you exit the match as the Roulette Champion.

Bill, Bea, and Iris arrive at their hotel. They thank the camera person for their dedication to their work assignment and Bea hands them a huge monetary tip. The camera person thanks them for their kindness then they cut their camera feed and our screen goes dark.


163
Climax Control Archives / THIS MATCH IS A GIFT TO ME
« on: April 20, 2022, 12:06:25 PM »
THIS MATCH IS A GIFT TO ME

Narrator:  Bea has a match at Climax Control 329 against Andrea Hernandez at Climax Control 329. This assignment to this match came when Keira Fisher was unable to make her assignment to this match against Andrea Hernandez so Management asked Bea to take the spot. In my conversation with her before coming on camera to give you my lead-in comments Bea’s upcoming match Bea told me she never takes an opportunity lightly and she takes full advantage of gifts like this assignment.

IRIS GETS GROOMED TO SHOW OFF FOR PETE THE CACTUS

The scene opens at HOT DOGS AND COOL CATS pet grooming salon in Rhodes, Greece. We see Bea walking into the salon with Iris her English Bulldog. While waiting to be served Bea has a talk with Iris.

Bea:  Iris I brought you here to the pet grooming salon as I’m having you cleaned up so you look good and smell good so when Pete the Cactus sees you he’ll go ever more crazy over you than he normally does.

Iris:  Arf! Woof! Growl! Grumble! (Translation:  I don’t want a bath! Pete loves me the way I am so why do I have to take a bath and get groomed and have perfume sprayed onto me?)

Bea:  I knew you would be excited about this grooming trip! Here’s your groomer now. Have fun Iris and I’ll be back in a few hours.

Iris:  Growl! Grumble! Snarl! (Translation:  I’ll show you what fun is when you take me home after this grooming appointment! Just wait!)

Bea leaves the HOT DOGS AND COOL CATS pet grooming and she heads off to the Diagoras Stadium where she is scheduled to present her comments for Climax Control 329.

BEA AT DIAGORAS STADIUM

Bea has arrived at the Diagoras Stadium and she is met by a camera crew waiting for her in front of the wrestling ring where the matches for Climax Control 329 will take place. The camera crew informs Bea they are going live broadcasting in thirty seconds and Bea stands ready to present her comments. When they give Bea the signal they are broadcasting she launches into her comments.

P’S AND F’S

Bea:  As most of you know, unless you.re a moron like my upcoming opponent  Andrea Hernandez, I’m from the Philippines. Unlike most Filipinos I’m well educated and talented so I don’t come across as a fool as many of those from the Philippines do. For your viewing enjoyment I’ll present to you a comedy routine that was performed by the comedian Buddy Hackett. Being from the Philippines I appreciate how this particular comedy routine is done. Also when you take into consideration that Buddy Hackett often performed this on live television had he slipped up just once the censors and the Federal Communications Commission would have brought lawsuits against those involved. I’ll have the Network present a short video of Buddy Hackett performing his comedy skit he calls LEO THE FILIPINO.

The network brings up the video of Buddy Hackett performing his LEO THE FILIPINO skit.

Leo the Filipino:  Buddy I’m pucking fissed off!

Buddy Hackett:  Why are you so upset Leo? I’ve never seen you this upset before.

Leo the Filipino:  I’m upset because the foliceman gave me a pucking farking ticket!

Buddy Hackett:  Everyone gets a parking ticket now and then so there’s really no need to be so upset. What happened to cause you to get the parking ticket?

Leo the Filipino:  I farked my car in front of that sign over there and when the Foliceman saw my car parked there he gave me a Farking ticket stating I illegally parked in a no-farking zone. Now I’m upset so I start arguing with the Foliceman. I asked him WHY DID YOU GIVE ME A PUCKING FARKING TICKET? I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS A NO FARKING ZONE! MY GIRLFRIEND TOLD ME TO FARK AND CAR THERE AND I DID WHAT SHE SAID. Then when the Foliceman told me I have to pay the $50 fine for illegally Farking my car in I got so upset I went off on the Foliceman. I demanded to know WHY DID YOU GIVE ME THE PUCKING FARKING TICKET WHEN I DIDN’T KNOW I WAS FARKING THE CAR IN AN ILLEGAL FLACE? CAN’T YOU HAVE COMPASSION AND TAKE BACK YOUR PUCKING FARKING TICKET?

Buddy Hackett:  What happened after you said that to the policeman?

Leo the Filipino:  He wrote me another ticket for arguing and insulting him and the second ticket cost me an additional $100.

Buddy Hackett:  Well you learned a valuable lesson that day Leo. Don’t argue with the police.

Leo the Filipino:  Puck that pucking bullshit!

The short video from Buddy Hackett ends and we return to a shot of Bea in front of the wrestling ring.

BEA’S HISTORY AGAINST ANDREA HERNANDEZ

Bea:  As I stated I don’t transpose P’s and F’s like Leo the Filipino did, as I’m highly educated and intelligent. However it is a funny comedy routine and one slip-up would be a disaster. I was assigned to face Andrea Hernandez at Climax Control 329 because Keira Fisher was unable to make her assignment to that match. So, Andrea, what are your thoughts about me being assigned to this match instead of Keira? I mean, come on, let it out, tell us how you feel having a reasonable reign as Internet Champion then April 3, 2022, you lost the Internet Championship to Masque De Lune? Nobody enjoys losing a Championship so I’m sure you feel bad, sad, and disappointed, but you should manage to hold another Championship some day. Suck it up and move on.

Bea pauses to take a drink of water then she continues with her comments.

Bea:  Before you say something about our history against each other I’ll take the opportunity to inform the viewers so you don’t have to waste your breath. We’ve met in the ring only once Andrea and I admit you won that match by pinfall. But for the education of the viewers I need to state the facts so when you make all your claims they’ll know the truth. When we met on February 2, 2020, at Climax Control 260, that was only my third match as a wrestler. I was new to the sport and you, having a bit more experience, got the win in that match. We haven’t met in the ring since that time. Maybe you fail to take into consideration that a lot has happened in two years and two months since our first match with each other. Maybe you forget that at one point in your wrestling career you were a rookie and had to take a lot of hard knocks before you got up and took charge. Whether you forgot all of that from your beginner days, or you just care to ignore the truth, so be it. The truth is that you are facing me, not Keira, and I plan on impressing the world so they’ll see I’m deserving of a shot at the Internet Championship, and other Championships, here in Sin City Wrestling. If you wish to take me lightly it’s your loss.

Bea informs the camera crew she needs to pick Iris up at the HOT DOGS AND COOL CATS groomers and that she’ll return later to air more comments for her upcoming match. They cut their feed to the network and our screen goes dark.

RETURN TO HOT DOGS AND COOLS CATS GROOMERS TO GET IRIS

The scene comes on our screen and we see Bea Barnhart in the lobby of HOT DOGS AND COOL CATS groomers in Rhodes. She is waiting for Iris to be brought out. When Iris comes out Bea is excited to see Iris need and clean, with her hair trimmed, wearing numerous bows and a bandana, and she smells of expensive doggy perfume. The look on the face of Iris is enough to let us know she didn’t want a bath but she had no choice.

Bea:  IRIS! You look stunning and you smell great! Wait until Pete the Cactus sees you looking and smelling great!

Iris:  Grumble! Snort! Growl! Howl! (Translation:  I’ll give you something to smell when we return to our hotel room!)

Bea:  On our way to our hotel I have a special surprise for you. We’ll stop by a restaurant that is pet friendly and I’ll buy lunch for you and Pete the Cactus, then we can finish is off with ice cream for you two, then we will return to our hotel room so you and Pete can play video games while I return to the stadium to continue my comments concerning my upcoming match with Andrea Hernandez.

Iris:  Bark! Arf! Howl! Squeal! (Translation:  Since you put it that way I’ll behave and not stink up our hotel room. Thanks Mommy!)

Bea and Iris take off and the scene slowly fades out as they walk away.

BEA HAS RETURNED TO DIAGORAS STADIUM TO AIR MORE COMMENTS

We again see Bea Barnhart standing in front of the wrestling ring at Diagoras Stadium where she will face Andrea Hernandez at Climax Control 329. When the camera crew informs Bea they are live broadcasting Bea launches into her comments.

Bea:  Andrea. . .Andrea. . .Andrea. You are in for a very special match against me. You don’t take me seriously but after I defeat you then you will become a supporter of me as you will no longer be able to defeat me in the ring. When we are into the action of our match and you try to land a blow or maneuver on me I won’t be there to accept it. I’m quick in the ring and you will not be able to latch onto me. As soon as you realize you missed a blow or maneuver and turn around to try another one I’ll have already landed a blow or maneuver on you. The concept is a simple one of me attacking quickly then quickly moving out of your reach. You’ll be so frustrated by the five minute mark in our match that you’ll just give up and take the loss to me. Yeah. . .yeah. . .yeah. . .you think that won’t be the case in our match. You think that can never happen to you against me. Imagine your surprise and shock when I defeat you and prove to the fans who they should be supporting.

Bea flashes a huge grin.

Bea:  I’m going to be so quick in our match that you’ll think I can time travel where I zap out from in front of you and the next instant I’m behind her applying another maneuver or hold on you. You’ll get dizzy spinning around trying to figure out where I’ll be the next moment. But, Andrea, there’s no need for you to fear and tremble as I won’t drag out your loss to me just to make you suffer. You’ll suffer enough when I quickly defeat you and nobody will believe in you any longer. Remember my assignment to this match is not a punishment placed on me. It is a gift handed to me. Have a nice day.

Bea informs the camera crew she’s done with her comments and they cut their camera feed and our screen goes dark.


164
Climax Control Archives / I WILL BE THE NEXT INTERNET CHAMPION
« on: April 14, 2022, 03:45:02 PM »
I WILL BE THE NEXT INTERNET CHAMPION

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart got a gift handed to him when the Climax Control 328 card was announced. Even though Bill lost the Roulette Championship to Finn Whelan at Climax Control 326 when Climax Control 328 was announced Bill is facing Jack Washington for the Internet Championship.

BILL AND IRIS RAISE MONEY WITH A LASAGNA EATING CONTESTs

The scene changes and we are taken back to Tuesday, April 5, 2022, while Bill and Bea Barnhart, along with their English Bulldog Iris, were still in Lawrenceville, Georgia, before they traveled to Greece. They are at the Gwinnett County Fairgrounds located at 2405 Sugarloaf Pkwy, Lawrenceville, Georgia, not far from their home. Today Bill and Iris are facing off in a Lasagna eating competition to raise money for homeless people in the Lawrenceville area. Bea will be acting as moderator for the event and they invited Anthony Amey, the Sports Anchor at WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta, to be the official Referee for this event.

Bea:  Welcome to another fundraising challenge pitting Bill Barnhart against Iris the Bulldog. Today they are participating against each other in a lasagna eating contest. Each of them will receive a tray of lasagna that weight three pounds. They will have a maximum of five minutes to devour the lasagna. If one of them can devour the lasagna in that time they will win. If neither of them finishes their lasagna when the five minutes are up then we will weigh the remaining trays of lasagna to see which has the lighter one. The one with the lighter weight tray of lasagna remaining will be declared the winner. Today we have our friend, Anthony Amey, who is the Sports Anchor at WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta. Anthony are you ready to referee this contest?

Anthony:  Yes! Let’s get this contest underway!

The serving staff brings out two three pound trays of lasagna. To ensure there is no cheating they weight both trays to ensure both are exactly three pounds. Both Bill and Iris are satisfied that this contest will be fair and equal.

Anthony:  Bill. . .Iris. . .I have in my hand an air horn. When I blow the air horn the five minutes allotted for this lasagna eating contest begins. When the five minutes are up I will blow the air horn again and the contest will be officially over and both of you must immediately stop eating. However if one of you finishes your tray of lasagna before the five minutes are up then you are automatically declared the winner. Are you two ready?

Bill:  Hell yeah!

Iris:  Woof Bark! (interpretation:  Hell yeah!)

Anthony Amey blows the air horn and this contest is officially underway. Iris dives face-first into her tray of lasagna immediately putting Bill behind. Bill realizes this and he picks up the pace and he manages to come up even with Iris at this time.

Anthony:  One minute has elapsed. Four minutes to go!

Bill takes the time announcement as his incentive to pick up his eating pace. Iris isn’t going to let Daddy Bill get away with passing her up eating lasagna so she picks up the pace also. Both are about one fourth done with their trays of lasagna.

Anthony:  Two minutes have elapsed. You two have three minutes left to devour the remaining three-fourths of your lasagna!

Iris picks up the pace of eating faster than Bill does. However in the process Iris sucked  in a bit too much lasagna and she starts coughing and gasping. Bill takes the advantage by consistently eating without choking like Iris just did.

Anthony:  Three minutes are gone and both contestants are just shy of the half way point in their lasagna with Bill quickly closing in on the half way point.

Iris has a look at her face that indicates it is all or nothing for her in this contest so she continues to gulp, swallow, and gasp, but she’s making better progress now and it appears she’s passed Bill up by a bit.

Anthony:  Four minutes are up. Only one minute to go and both Bill and Iris are just barely past the half way point in their pans of lasagna. This is going to be an interesting finish!

Bill picks up the pace and passes Iris. Iris speeds up and passes Bill. They go back and forth several times but the time has run out and Anthony Amey blows the air horn to end the contest. Both Bill and Iris stop eating and now the weighing of the remaining lasagna needs to take place.

Anthony:  That’s it! This contest is over! The serving staff will now weigh both lasagna trays and whichever tray is lighter that person, or dog, will be declared the winner.

With both lasagna trays containing just a bit less than half the lasagna this will be a close weighing event. They put Bill’s lasagna tray on the scale and he comes in at one pound four ounces which means Bill ate one pound twelve ounces of lasagna. When they put the lasagna pan of Iris on the scale it comes in at one pound six ounces which means Iris ate one pound ten ounces of lasagna making Bill the winner by two ounces.

Anthony:  The winner of this lasagna eating contest, by two ounces, BILL BARNHART!!!

The crowd cheers but Iris is obviously sad she lost. Bill and Iris comfort her and they remind her of the many contests she won against Daddy Bill. They hand Iris all of the remaining lasagna from the two trays and Iris quickly forgets about being sad for losing against Daddy Bill.

Bea:  I have an envelope here with $2,500 that was donated by the community in Lawrenceville, Georgia, and we are giving this money to the City of Lawrenceville to help homeless people. Thanks to everyone who donated to this fundraising event and for you who came out today to watch Bill and Iris compete and cheer them on!

The scene changes are we are taken to today in Crete, Greece, where Bill will be taking on Jack Washington for the Internet Championship. We see Bill and Bea sitting at a table which appears to be in the broadcast studio at the Theodoros Vardinogiannis Stadium. Bill is casually dressed in blue jeans and a black pullover shirt and Bea is casually dressed in slacks and a white buttoned shirt.  The techs in the studio inform Bill they are now live broadcasting.

I WILL BE THE NEXT INTERNET CHAMPION

Bill:  Jack let me start my comments by informing you that I’m going to be the next Internet Champion. That will happen on Sunday, April 17, 2022, at Climax Control 328, and there’s not a damn thing you can do to prevent me from winning the Internet Championship. How can I make a bold statement like that? Let me inform you of the facts.

Bea:  You tell him Bill.

Bill:  One reason you cannot defeat me comes from Climax Control 326. What happened on that day Jack? You faced my friend, Senor Vinnie, in a non-title match and he defeated you but you were fortunate that the Internet Championship wasn’t on the line in that match. You’ll be defeated again at Climax Control 328 but this time by me and I become the Internet Champion.

Bea:  Bill Barnhart. . .Internet Champion. . .that has a nice ring to it.

Bill flashes a big smile.

Bill:  So, Jack, shall we review your Championship history to date? You won the Heavyweight Championship on September 27, 2020 and lost is 3 months later on December 20, 2020. Then you regained the Heavyweight Championship on March 7, 2021 but lost it two months later on May 23, 2021. And now for the Internet Championship you currently hold. You obtained the Internet Championship on March 20, 2022, and I assure you that you’ll lose it to me on April 17, 2022, at Climax Control 328 for a one month reign. Hmmm. Something just popped into my head. You total combined time as a Champion for the two Heavyweight Championships and your current Internet Championship is less than my one reign as Roulette Champion. The concept concerning Championships isn’t to hold a lot of Championships and lose them quickly like you’ve done. The concept is to earn a Championship and retain it for a respectable amount of time. That you have failed to do.

Bea:  Nice slam dunk Bill.

Bill grins larger this time.

Bill:  Let’s get a few things out in the open Jack. Have you faced me in the wrestling ring yet? Nope! Are you aware that I’m going to defeat you and walk away from our match as the Internet Champion? Nope! You’re delusional thinking that with your pathetic record of winning championships and quickly losing them that you can defeat me. You seem to fail to take into consideration that I held the Roulette Championship for six months. I successfully defended it several times. I didn’t earn the Roulette Championship and lose is quickly as you did with the Heavyweight Championship. People like you enjoy making jokes about me as a wrestler. You all had your fun but when I became Roulette Champion and retained the Championship for six months all the jokes stopped. When I whup your ass and become Internet Champion all the harassment from others stop and everyone will wake up to who I am and what I’ve accomplished and they will start praising me.

Bea:  Well stated Bill.

Bill flashes a Joker from Batman type of grin.

Bill:  Another thing I want to get out in the open. Recently Goth won a multi-wrestler match with the winner obtaining a shot at the wrestler who is holding the Internet Championship at the next Super Card. I know you were cowering when you saw Goth win his match because I know you don’t want to face him as he’s an impressive wrestler. But who are you facing at Climax Control 328? ME! And here’s a bit of history for you. When I worked in Asylum Wrestling Alliance I took out Goth more times than he took me out both inside the wrestling ring and outside the wrestling ring. Not only in the wrestling ring as a wrestler but in a personal way as I worked as his Assistant in helping with the Federation. So imagine what you’re facing this Sunday. A wrestler who was able to take Goth out of action more times than Goth was able to take me out of action. Plainly stated you are facing me, not Goth, and after I win the Internet Championship from you this Sunday I’ll be the wrestler defending against Goth at the next Super Card. Then after I defeat Goth, and properly retain my Internet Championship, the entire wrestling world will stand up and salute me!

Bea:  Although I know other wrestlers, and most of the viewers, don’t like me reminding them of my Manager status in Bill’s corner during his matches I’ll state my position anyway. I’m in Bill’s corner as his Manager to ensure there are no run-ins on his matches, no cheating by his opponents, and no other illegal activity in the ring. So, Jack, if you attempt illegal stuff during the match I’ll inform the Referee and keep you in line. If others try to run in on the match to help you they’ll be stopped and taken out before they get to the ring. You’ve been warned. Take my warning seriously.

Bill:  Thanks Bea. Jack I’m a wrestler who goes all out in every match. I never hold back. I’m a wrestler who never once demanded or begged for a shot at a Championship. Every shot given to me was given to me by Management because they like what they saw in me and wanted to give the Champions a challenge. If you think I don’t make an impression on Management by performing my job well in Sin City Wrestling remember that I never beg or demand Management for shots at Championships. Unlike the rest of you who demand shots at Championships when you didn’t earn it I do my job and don’t beg and demand anything. Take into account that two weeks after losing the Roulette Championship to Finn Whelan we saw Management sending me to challenge you for the Internet Championship. There’s a full roster of wrestlers that most people feel are more deserving of a shot at you but I got it. Did I beg Management for this match? NO! Did I threaten them if they didn’t give me this match against you? NO! Did I bribe them with money or other favors? NO! I got this shot because I’m an amazingly gifted wrestler and they acknowledge that fact!

Bea:  Woo Hoo!

Bill laughs loudly then continues with his comments.

Bill:  Jack I’m not a stand-up comedian but I have a few stand-up comedy lines I’d like to present to you. . .

What do you call a man who had a penis injury and had an artificial penis made for him from wood? WOODPECKER!!!

What nickname do you call a man who has a wooden artificial penis?  WOODY!!!

What do you call a wrestler who has held three Championships in Sin City Wrestling, who quickly lost the first two, then at Climax Control 326 he lost his match against my friend, Senor Vinnie, and now he’s going to lose the Internet Championship to me at Climax Control 328? LOSER!!!

Bill and Bea both roar with laughter. The techs in the studio inform Bill and Bea that they are taking a one minute commercial break then they will return to broadcasting.

AFTER THE COMMERCIAL BREAK

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bill:  Final recap of what I stated to you today Jack. ONE. . .you suck. TWO. . .you’ll lose the Internet Championship to me at Climax Control 318. THREE. . .I’ll be defending the Internet Championship at the next Super Card. FOUR. . .You’ll never be able to defeat me. FIVE. . .Have fun leading up to our match this Sunday, if you are able to remain calm and relaxed knowing who and what is facing you, and I’ll see you on Sunday in the Main Event!

Bill gives the CUT sign to the studio staff and they cut their feed and our screen goes dark.


165
Climax Control Archives / NOBODY IS KILLING MY DREAMS
« on: April 06, 2022, 09:57:02 AM »
Pete the Cactus used by permission of Gerrit *

NOBODY IS KILLING MY DREAMS

The scene comes on our screen and we see Bill and Bea Barnhart’s Narrator ready to give his lead-in comments for Bea’s match against Kayla Richards at Climax Control 327.

Narrator:  I had a talk with Bea Barnhart before I came on camera to present lead-in comments concerning her match. If you think lava in a volcano is fired up and hot I’m here to tell you that Bea is fired up and hot and ready to destroy Kayla Richards. I will leave the remaining comments on Bea’s match to her to present to you.

The scene fades out. . .

ZAKYNTHOS, GREECE

The scene comes back on our screen and we see Bea Barnhart in what looks to be a hotel room. We assume she will explain her location soon. In the background we see her husband, Bill Barnhart, who is now the ex-Roulette Champion having lost the Championship to Finn Whelan at Climax Control 326. We don’t see Iris in the background but we are sure she is in the hotel room somewhere. The camera person informs Bea they are broadcasting so she sets herself in front of the camera to present her comments for Climax Control 327.

Bea:  Thank you for joining me today. We’re at a hotel near the Azure Resort and Spa located in Zakynthos, Greece, where Sin City Wrestling is holding Climax Control 327. I wish to have my husband, Bill Barnhart, join me on camera for a short time before I launch into my comments for my match against Kayla Richards.

Bill walks over to Bea and stands next to her.

Bea:  Bill has been Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion for six months. He lost the Roulette Championship to Finn Whelan in what I call one of the most interesting Roulette Wheel spins ever. You can take over the comments on the Roulette Championship from here Bill.

Bill: Me and Finn Whelan, were surprised when the Roulette Wheel landed on a stipulation that there would be a maximum of twelve types of matches within the match and each wrestler had to try to win as many of those matches during the time limit of the match. We both ended up with six wins each so we went into a tie-breaker. Finn ended up winning the tie-breaker so he is now Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion. I want to tell Finn that he did an amazing job in our match. We both did great. The fact that Finn didn’t give up makes me appreciate what he accomplished. Well done!

Bea:  Thanks, Bill, for being a great husband and wrestler and you were a great Roulette Champion. The fact that you commend your opponent for earning the Roulette Championship away from you tells the world what a wonderful person, man, and wrestler, you are. Could you check on Iris in the other room Bill? It has been extremely quiet in her room and that makes me think she’s up to something.

Bill walks toward the room where Iris is located but when he is a few feet from entering the room he hears music and rustling noises.

Bea:  I ask the viewers to excuse me for a moment so I can find out what’s going on with Iris.

As Bea begins to walk toward the room where Iris is located, but before she can reach where Bill is standing, we hear the song AFTERNOON DELIGHT by Starland Vocal Band playing. We all know that the song references having a sexual encounter so both Bill and Bea are concerned. Bea walks up and stands next to Bill and before the two can enter the room where Iris is located we watch as Pete the Cactus exits the room wearing a fancy bathrobe while smoking a fancy cigar with a huge smile on his face.

Bill:  PETE! What in the hell was going on in there with you and Iris?

Bea:  IRIS! What in the hell was going on in there with you and Pete?

Of course the implication was there that Pete and Iris were having sex until Bill and Bea walk into the bedroom of Iris. They notice videos games on the screens of the two laptops in the room, one belonging to Iris and one belonging to Pete the Cactus.

Bea:  Iris! Tell me the truth! What was going on with you and Pete in the room?

Iris:  Woof! Bark! Snarl! Whimper! (Translation:  We were playing video games against each other and Pete won against me so I got pouty on him.)

Bill:  Pete! If you two were just playing videos games why in the hell did you come out of the room of Iris wearing a fancy bathrobe, smoking a fancy cigar, and with a huge smile on your face?

Pete: ! ! ! ! ! * * * * * # # # # # ? ? ? ? ? (Translation:  I soundly defeated Iris in the video games. She’s not as good a player as I am and Iris is a sore loser. When I won, and I won easily, I celebrated by putting on my fancy bathrobe, lit up my cigar, and of course I had a huge smile on my face. Stop trying to insinuate things against me and Iris okay!

Bill and Bea look at each other and shrug their shoulders. Bill goes into the room with Iris and Pete and Bea returns to where she was presenting her comments for her match against Kayla Richards.

MEASURING UP

Bea:  I apologize for the interruption by Pete and Iris. Turns out it was a case of us misunderstanding what happened. Concerning my match at Climax Control 327 I’m facing Kayla Richards. So, Kayla, you seem to want to portray yourself as a psycho, anger laden, hateful person, who loves destroying people and killing their dreams. Before I talk about those claims I wish to talk about how we measure up. You come into our match listed at five feet nine inches and one hundred twenty-eight pounds. I come into our match at five feet five inches and one hundred thirty pounds. We’re basically equal in weight but you are four inches taller. I assure you that having a four inch height advantage won’t help you at all. I’ve done exceptionally well against wrestlers taller, larger, heavier, and more experienced than you are.

Bea flashes a smile into the camera.

REMAINING SILENT IS ALWAYS THE BETTER DECISION

Bea:  Kayla you seem to enjoy running around spouting off that you’ll kill the dreams of your opponents. Tsk tsk tsk! Nice claims but it is always better for people like you to remain silent. I’ll present the information to you and then you have a decision to make. Samuel Langhorn Clemens, better known by his Pen Name of Mark Twain, was a popular American writer, humorist, entrepreneur, publisher, and lecturer. One of his most profound quotes is “It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to talk and remove all doubt.”

Bea puts her hand over her mouth in a gesture to Kayla that Kayla would have been better served had she kept her mouth shut rather than to issue threats to her.

Bea:  Mark Twain said it straight but you have decided to ignore his advice and prove to the world you’re a fool. Nice going Kayla!

NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE

Bea:  One of my favorite songs is WE’RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT by Twisted Sister. I’ll ask the Network to put up a graphic of part of the lyrics of the song as they apply to you and me in our match.

The Network puts the graphic on the screen showing the section of lyrics Bea wants to present.

We'll fight the powers that be just
Don't pick our destiny 'cause
You don't know us, you don't belong

We're not gonna take it
Oh no, we ain't gonna take it
We're not gonna take it anymore

Oh, you're so condescending
Your gall is never ending
We don't want nothin', not a thing from you

Your life is trite and jaded
Boring and confiscated
If that's your best, your best won't do!!!

The Network leaves the lyrics on the screen while Bea continues with her comments.

Bea:  I’m leaving the lyrics on the screen so you can see where I’ve modified the lyrics to change WE’RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT to read I’M NOT GONNA TAKE IT. And the lyrics go “Your life is trite and jaded. . .Boring and confiscated. . .If that's your best, your best won't do!!! It comes down to this Kayla. If you want to rant and rave, and beat your your chest with your fists, and foam at the mouth, claiming how violent in the ring you think you are, and claiming to be the killer of dreams, well as Twisted Sister stated it in their song IF THAT’S YOUR BEST YOUR BEST WON’T DO!!!  I challenge you to try to give me your best in our match but no matter what you bring or what you try I’m walking away from our match as the winner.

FIVE ITEMS FOR YOU TO CONSIDER

Bea holds one finger up.

Bea:  First item for you Kayla is that you’re not killing my dreams. You may kill yourself trying to defeat me but my dreams remain intact.

Bea holds two fingers up.

Bea:  Second item is that although you, and most of the other Bombshells in Sin City Wrestling, make fun of my overall win-loss record the fact remains that they’re jealous. Why, you ask, would the other Bombshells be jealous of me when I have yet to hold a Singles Championship, but I have held the Mixed Tag Team Championship, and my win-loss record isn’t in the outstanding category? Good question. They’re jealous because I perform exceptionally well in all my matches. Win or lose I’ve gained the attention of Management and I’ve been assigned to five Championship matches without having to beg Management to give me one like nearly all the other Bombshells in Sin City Wrestling do. I won one of them, the Mixed Tag Team Championship. Soon I’ll earn a Singles Championship and then that will shut everyone up!

Bea holds up three fingers.

Bea:  My third item is that I’m not just going to defeat you in our match. I plan on making you suffer and make you submit to one of my numerous submission holds.

Bea holds four fingers up.

Bea:  I have my stomping boots on for our match and I plan on stomping at least four mud holes in you during our match.

Bea holds five fingers up.

Bea:  My fifth and final item for you revolves around the number five. I plan on defeating you in five minutes or less so be prepared for that.

CLOSING COMMENTS

We watch as Bea walks over to the table in the dining area of the room and she pulls out a pair of her wrestling boots from a box on top of the dining table. Bea puts the boots on then she has the camera person get a shot of her wrestling boots before they focus on her face again.

Bea:  Kayla I can’t expect someone of your low status in life to know about music that was perfect for the time it was created. I put on my wrestling boots for a visual for a reason. There was a song by Nancy Sinatra, the daughter of Frank Sinatra, titled THESE BOOTS ARE MADE FOR WALKING. In the original lyrics it stated THESE BOOTS ARE MADE FOR WALKING AND THAT’S JUST WHAT THEY’LL DO. . .ONE OF THESE DAYS THESE BOOTS ARE GONNA WALK ALL OVER YOU. For your benefit and enjoyment I modified the original lyrics and they go as follows:  THESE BOOTS ARE MADE FOR STOMPING. . .AND THAT’S JUST WHAT THEY’LL DO. . .AT CLIMAX CONTROL MY BOOTS ARE GONNA STOMP ALL OVER YOU!!!

Bea bursts out in laughter then she asks the Network to take the lyrics off the screen.

Bea:  I’m going to enjoy beating the crap out of you Kayla! I’m going to enjoy stomping the hell out of you! I’m going to enjoy having my hand raised in victory! See you on Sunday, March 10, 2022.

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments and that they can cut their camera feed. They do so and our screen goes dark.


166
Climax Control Archives / I'M WRESTLING A JOKE FOR AN OPPONENT
« on: March 31, 2022, 08:33:11 AM »
I’M WRESTLING A JOKE FOR AN OPPONENT

Narrator:  For a long time in his previous wrestling federation Bill Barnhart had to wrestle, meaning fight hard, against his half-brother Chris Shipman. Now the people in Sin City Wrestling Management have decided that Bill should face off against Finn Whelan with the claim that Finn Whelan is more than Chris Shipman ever was. Well with someone getting accolades they don’t deserve, meaning Finn Whelan is less than half what Chris Shipman was, I see another successful Roulette Championship defense by Bill at Climax Control 326.

BILL BARNHART AT FIVE YEARS OLD

The scene comes into focus and we see a five year old Bill Barnhart on the street in front of his home at 4263 Saint Andrews Road in Oakland, California, where Bill grew up. Bill Barnhart’s father, William Barnhart, is taking the training wheels off Bill’s bicycle.

Bill:  Father what are you doing? If I don’t have the training wheels I might fall over on my bike until I learn how to balance properly and get hurt. I’m only five years old remember?

Father:  Of course I know you’re five years old as you’re my son! Bill there’s only one way to win at riding a bike and that also translates into how to win in life. Everyone learns to ride a bike starting with a tricycle, then they move up to a bicycle with training wheels, then they remove the training wheels and learn to balance and ride the bicycle with ease. Now get on the bike and ride!

Five year old Bill Barnhart gets on the bicycle that no longer has training wheels and he takes off. After a short distance Bill topples over but isn’t able to get his foot out in time to stop his fall to the pavement. Bill scrapes his knee on the pavement and we see he is in pain and his leg is bleeding.

Bill:  Damn! Now I got a scraped-up knee and I’m bleeding and it hurts!

Father:  Shut up boy and suck it up! When I served in World War II in the United States Navy I saw shipmates take shrapnel that cut them deep and they were bleeding and in a hell of a lot more pain than you are right now! You know what my shipmates did? They got up and continued taking the fight to the enemy. Your enemy, Bill, is being afraid to get hurt. Everyone gets hurt in life and they deal with that pain so deal with it! Get your ass back on the bike and conquer it!

Bill grumbles but obeys his father and gets back onto the bike. Bill wobbles like he previously did but this time he manages to maintain his balance and control of the bike. Bill quickly learns that a bike in motion tends to want to stay upright and the only time you need to think about the bike toppling over is when you go too slow. After a few minutes Bill is traveling up and down their street with ease. When Bill returns to where his father is waiting for him his father imparts some advice.

Father:  Bill you did great! Had you let your frustration, a bruised leg, and a little blood scare you off you wouldn’t be enjoying riding your bike just now. Whatever you end up doing in life as your line of work you always look forward and don’t look back. When you have failures in your life you do the same thing you did with your bike after you took a fall. You get back up and continue to move forward. Never back down from anything. Be confident in what you’re capable of accomplishing and you’ll always be successful.

The scene of five year old Bill Barnhart conquering riding his bike without training wheels, and powering through the pain of falling over, scraping his knee on the pavement, and bleeding, ends and we are returned to present-day time.

PRESENT-DAY TIME IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

The present-day scene opens to see Bill and Bea Barnhart getting out of Bill’s Hyundai Santa Fe SUV and walking toward McCray’s Tavern located at 100 North Perry Street in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The assigned camera person follows them to the entrance of the tavern. The instant Bill steps through the doors of McCray’s Tavern everyone in the tavern yells out BILLLLLLLLLL!!! in the same fashion patrons did when Norm, in the television series CHEERS, walked into the bar. Bill takes a bow and greets everyone then he and Bea take their normal seats at the bar.

Bill:  Thanks for the wonderful greeting! Nice to be well known and appreciated.

Bea:  Bill you are always well known and appreciated.

Bartender:  Bill you’re our hero. You live in Lawrenceville, Georgia, and you’ve been an outstanding wrestler for many years and you’ve brought attention and honor to our city of Lawrenceville.

Bill:  Awwww, that’s nice to hear, and again thanks for the welcome when we walked in. By the way have you heard that Sin City Wrestling is currently on a Greek tour? Our first stop is in Corfu, Greece, at the Corfu National Stadium. I’m defending my Roulette Championship against someone named Finn Whelan.

Bartender:  Finn Whelan? Who the *bleep* is that? I’ve never heard of him so how in the hell did he get a shot at your Roulette Championship? Anyone here today ever heard of Finn Whelan?

The Bartender looks around the bar and the patrons shrug their shoulders and tell the Bartender they have no clue who Finn Whelan is.

Bartender:  There you go Bill. Nobody here has ever heard of Finn Whelan. So what are you thinking about why he got assigned to take you on for the Roulette Championship?

Bill:  I haven’t a clue. This is the first time I’ve heard his name mentioned. Some are even trying to tell me that Finn Whelan is a hell of a lot more violent and aggressive than my half-brother Chris Shipman.

Bartender:  Seriously? There’s people out there who think there’s a wrestler more violent and aggressive than your half-brother Chris Shipman? It’s impossible that anyone can be more violent and aggressive than Shipman. The fact that you destroyed Chris Shipman so many times that he went into retirement says it all.

Bill:  That’s what I said. The world, and Finn Whelan, will find out on Sunday, April 3, 2022, at Climax Control 326, that I’m the Roulette Champion and will remain Roulette Champion for a very long time. DRINKS FOR EVERYONE ON ME!!!

Bea:  That’s a nice gesture Bill.

Everyone in the bar roars their approval to Bill buying a round of drinks for all of them. While everyone is celebrating the scene starts to fade out until our screen goes dark.

AT THE HOME OF BILL AND BEA IN LAWRENCEVILLE GEORGIA

The camera feed of the assigned camera person comes on our screen and we see that we are in the home of Bill and Bea Barnhart. Bill and Bea are sitting on the couch in the Living Room and Iris is sitting next to Daddy Bill on the couch. We notice there are some visible scratches and bruises on Bill, from his match against Alexander Raven at Blaze of Glory X where Bill successfully defended his Roulette Championship, but overall we know he’s fine and ready to go for his match with Finn Whelan.

HOW DID FINN WHELAN GET ASSIGNED TO THIS MATCH?

Bill:  Well my next victim is Finn Whelan. So, Finn, you managed to whine and complain and beg to Management and then demand a shot at my Roulette Championship. I haven’t heard of you except for a few small mentions prior to our upcoming match being scheduled. There’s a lot of wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling who should be sent to face me for my Roulette Championship but Management chose you instead. I guess they wanted to shut you up after you whined and complained and demanded a shot at my Roulette Championship. The saying is you should be careful what you ask for as you might just get it. I assure you that your claims of being more violent, more evil, more talented, and more hateful, than my half-brother Chris Shipman, is hilarious! Nobody in the world is more violent, evil, talented, or hateful, than Chris Shipman. In fact nobody in the Universe is more violent, evil, talented, or hateful, than my half-brother Chris Shipman except for me! But, Finn, you’ll find out the hard way what the truth is when I destroy you in our match. Let me enlighten you with a graphic I’ll have the Network put up on the screen to let you know why nobody yet has defeated me for my Roulette Championship. Would the Network please put up the graphic I sent to them? Thanks.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

A graphic of a Bill’s fist comes up on the screen with the wording MY FIST. . .ONE SIZE FITS ALL.

Bill:  Finn I wanted to show you this graphic to let you know that I’ll defeat you like I’ve defeated my previous challengers. We don’t know what match rules the Roulette Wheel is going to land on. Whether it is a tame Standard Rules match or a violent Hardcore Rules, or better yet a match with No Rules, I’m gonna win! Thanks to the Network for putting up my graphic. You can take it down now.

The Network removes the graphic and the scene returns to Bill and Bea and Iris sitting on their couch in their living room.

Bill:  Finn you’re one of those fake wrestlers that disgust me and I’ll give you the information you need so you know why you’re pathetic and that your attitude that you think you’re better than everyone else is bullshit. So, Finn, let me talk about wrestlers like you who have to make up identities, personas, and wear a false face, to make yourself appear to be bigger, badder, or stronger, than everyone else in the Federation. Some wrestlers wear a mask and claim they are invincible. Then we see you see them lose matches. Some wrestlers wear face paint to try to improve their look to appear aggressive then we see them lose matches when someone slaps their face paint off and defeats them. Some wrestlers take a deep breath and puff out their chest to appear larger than they really are but we watch them lose matches because they are full of fluff and no substance. Some wrestlers claim they have the pinning combinations or submission holds that guarantee them a win then we watch them lose again and again and again because their pinning combinations or submission holds didn’t work well on their opponents. How do all these pathetic ass clowns, especially you Finn, compare to me? I’m the real deal. I’m 100 percent who I say I am. I don’t have steroids in me. I don’t contain additives or artificial flavorings or colors. While the rest of you are fake goods I’m the real deal. Finn when you step into the ring with me you face a 100 percent honest and true wrestler and you’ll lose the match.

Bea:  I’ve heard the backstage talk and there’s a lot of stuff going around that Finn Whelan is known for obtaining help in matches to try to get a cheap win. I’m in Bill’s corner, as his Manager, to ensure nobody tries any crap to try to get a cheap win for Finn Whelan.

CUT AND BRUISED BUT I’M STILL STANDING

Bill: Okay I got a few dings, cuts, and scratches, from my Thumbtacks Rules Match to defend my Roulette Championship against Alexander Raven at Blaze of Glory X. Minor stuff in comparison of the years of violent and vicious attacks I took from my half-brother Chris Shipman. With all the weapons involved in my match with Alexander Raven I took some cuts and bruises in the match but I’m fine and thanks for asking. After slamming Alexander Raven into the Thumbtacks for the win I’m still Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion and that’s all that matters. Just remember what happened Alex. You went all-out from the start of the match and what happened is you went too much all-out. And what happened is the same thing that happened in our first match. You were doing well then you distracted your attention off of me and I took advantage of it. Simple as that. The bottom line can be summed up using lyrics from Elton John’s song I’M STILL STANDING. No matter what all my opponents have attempted to do they’ve all failed and I’m still standing as Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion. And, Finn, if you think you’re going to change that and earn my Roulette Championship away from me you better think hard and be prepared for a loss to me. Nobody else could defeat me and for damn sure you’re not gonna do it. After I defeat you I’ll use the lyrics from Elton John’s son and yell out I’M STILL STANDING as Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion!

Bea:  Even though Bill went through years of violent matches with his half-brother Chris Shipman, and you all might think it takes a long time for Bill to heal from his recent cuts and bruises, you’re wrong. . .dead wrong. Bill is a quick healer and when Climax Control 326 arrives Bill will be 100 percent ready to easily beat down and defeat Finn Whelan.

IMPROVISE

Bill:  What do you call is when you are doing something and you need to change things up to make it work well? They call that improvise. What do you do when you love eating Spam, and you love eating sandwiches, and you love eating Spam sandwiches, but when you try to make a Spam sandwich with bread all you get is a soggy sandwich? I came up with a solution. I love Spam and I love Hash Browns. So I came up with the concept a Hashbrowns Spam Sandwich. I fry up the Spam in a frying pan and cook up four hash brown patties in my air fryer at 400 degrees for 15 minutes. I spread a little ketchup on the hash browns and create a Hashbrowns Span Sandwich. I’ll ask the Network to please put up the graphic I sent to them. Thanks.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

The Network puts up the graphic of Bill’s Hashbrowns Span Sandwich. The graphic stays on the screen long enough for everyone to take in the graphic then the Network removes the graphic and Bill continues with his comments.

Bill:  See what I did there Finn? I don’t follow the crowd. I don’t do the same things everyone else does. I don’t follow what everyone else does just because everyone else follows what they do. I do my own thing. I create my own circumstances. I initiate my own advantages. I win wrestling matches, and I’ve been successful in defending my Roulette Championship, because I think during wrestling matches and I anticipate what opponents are going to do. Unlike you who make false claims and try to do high-risk maneuvers, which cause you to fail more than you succeed, I stick with what works for me. Try all the silly stuff if you want Whelan. Try all the high-flying maneuvers you want Finn. Do whatever you feel you need to do to get the win over me. No matter what you try you’ll fail.

Bill lets out a loud laugh then he regains his composure and continues with his comments.

TALKING OUT OF YOUR ASS

Bill:  Finn there’s a term TALKING OUT YOUR ASS and it has numerous interpretations of what that term means. Examples are to make an obviously false comment or claim. Another is to jump into a discussion on a topic you have no prior knowledge of and it usually results in the person looking like an idiot. Another definition is talking bullshit or nonsense. And, finally, the definition of TALKING OUT YOUR ASS, also known as VERBAL DIARRHEA, is often perpetrated by idiots who love to state their opinion on topics without having prior knowledge or information on the subject before jumping into the discussion. With that in mind I want everyone on the Sin City Wrestling Roster, especially you Finn, to understand that I plan on shoving your head up your ass so you’ll literally be talking out of your ass when you speak. And if you spread rumors by calling others on your cell phone I’ll shove your cell phone up your ass so you’ll be calling people and they will tell you that you are literally talking out of your ass.

Bea:  I wish to make one final comment then I need to bring Iris out for her walk. Finn we know you’re a desperate wrestler. We know you want to make a name for yourself. We know you’ll try to get others to get involved in the match so that you can claim it wasn’t YOU who cheated it was someone outside of the match who cheated. Try all you want punk but you won’t succeed. Others have tried and failed. When you try and fail you will get tossed on top of the other losers Bill took out. Come on Iris! Let’s go for a walk!

Iris gets excited to go for her walk and she jumps off the couch and runs to the front door so she can allow Mommy Bea to put her harness and leash on. We return our attention to Bill.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bill:  Oh, Finn, how it sucks to be you. How it sucks that you’ll walk into the ring over-confident only for me to send you home a pathetic loser. You may think you are something great but in reality you’re pathetic and you suck. Thinking you’re something, and actually being that something, are two different things and they are polar opposites.

Bill smiles into the camera.

Bill:  A Parakeet may think it is a Hawk but in reality it is still a small weak Parakeet. A house cat can think it is a Lion but in reality it is still a small house cat. I worm can think it is a Python but in reality it is still a little worm. A house fly can think it is a fighter jet but it is still an insignificant house fly. You, Finn, think you’re something you’re not just as the Parakeet, house cat, worm, and house fly think they’re something they’re not. Those creatures I mentioned are still what they are no matter what they think they are.

Bill laughs loudly.

Bill:  Take a look in a mirror Finn. What you see looking back at you is a pathetic piece of shit who hasn’t earned their shot at my Roulette Championship. I’ve never had a shot at a Championship handed to me because Management felt sorry for me like they feel sorry for you. I’ve earned every shot at a Championship that I’ve received. Now, Whelan, although their attempt to make you feel better, by giving you a shot at my Roulette Championship makes you feel like you’re actually worth something, you and I both know the truth. What I want when I defend my Roulette Championship is an opponent who is a legitimate challenge and not a token sacrifice thrown my way. Yes, Finn, that’s what you are. A token sacrifice to me. . .the god of Roulette Champions.

Bill roars with very loud laughter.

Bill:  You see, Finn, the difference between me and you is that you cower away from adversity when you get hurt or injured. Early in my life my father taught me to not let adversity keep me down. He told me if something knocks me down I need to get up and take on and defeat what knocked me down. Father told me about his Navy shipmates who got injured during World War II and yet even when cut and bruised and bleeding they continued to fight the enemy until they won the battle. I learned that as a young boy and I brought that concept to my wrestling career. I’m in the sport of wrestling to overcome everything and every type of wrestler. I’m in the sport of wrestling to show the world what a great wrestler is about. Yes I get bruised, cut, hurt, and bleed, just like everyone else. But that’s where the similarity ends. Whereas other wrestlers give up when they get bruised, cut, hurt, or they are bleeding, I get more aggressive, I power through the pain, and I come out victorious. I’m the total opposite of a pathetic wrestler as you are.

Bill roars extremely loud with laughter then he regains his composure to continue his comments.s

Bill:  Did I piss you off with my comments Finn? I did? Good! That’s what I intended to do! Please enjoy the rest of your time leading up to Climax Control 326 being healthy and without pain because when our match is done, and my hand is raised in victory, and I retain my Roulette Championship, you’ll crawl home and nurse your wounds for weeks.


167
Supercard Archives / Re: BULLDOG BARNHART (c) v ALEXANDER RAVEN - ROULETTE TITLE
« on: March 15, 2022, 12:14:51 PM »
* Senor Vinnie and Pete the Cactus used by permission of Gerrit *

YOU AIN’T GOT NOTHING ON ME

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart is more than a wrestler. Bill Barnhart is more than a great wrestler. Bill Barnhart is more than most other wrestlers combined. Bill Barnhart is a legend in the sport of wrestling. Bill Barnhart is also far superior to many superheroes you’ve heard of.

I LOVE IT WHEN YOU CALL ME ROULETTE CHAMPION

The scene comes into focus at the hotel room of Bill and Bea Barnhart near the Galen Center in Los Angeles, California. Bill is sitting on a large overstuffed chair ready to give his comments on his upcoming Roulette Championship defense match against Alexander Raven. Iris is curled up on the floor near Bill’s feet. We don’t see Bea so she must either be out of the hotel room or in another part of the room and she is out of camera view. Bill looks into the camera to begin his comments.

Bill:  I have a lot of things to say to my opponent, Alexander Raven, concerning our upcoming match. Alexander I want you to know. . .

Bill is interrupted when Bea casually walks between Bill and the camera and she is singing to herself. Bill watches and listens as Bea passes between him and the camera.

Bea:
I love it when you call me Senorita
I wish I could pretend I didn't need ya
But every touch is ooh, la-la-la
It's true, la-la-la
Ooh, I should be running
Ooh, you keep me coming for ya. . .

Bea was so into the song she was singing she didn’t realize she walked between Bill and the camera but when she realizes what she did she suddenly stops her singing and she apologizes to Bill.

Bea:  Oops! Sorry Bill. I didn’t realize you were already broadcasting.

Bill:  Not a problem Bea. In fact I love the song you were singing as I hear it on the radio in my Hyundai Santa Fe a lot. That song by Camila Cabello and Shawn Mendes is a great song. In fact I’ve been working on a parody version of that song to use since I’m Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion. Want to hear it?

Bea:  Sure!

Bill stands up from his chair and launches into his version of Senorita.

Bill:  Instead of calling it SENORITA, as the original song is titled, the name I selected for my version is ROULETTE CHAMPION. And since I’m the King of Parody, in addition to being the King of Roulette Champions, I’ve modified the lyrics to fit my amazing reign as Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion as follows.

Bill begins singing his version of the song.

Bill:
I love it when you call me Roulette Champion
And my reign as such has been amazing
But every blow I land on you
Will turn you black and blue
Ooh you should be running
Ooh you should be running from me

Bill is done with his parody version of the song so he takes a bow then returns to sitting on the chair.

I WON’T BACK DOWN

Bill:  Since we started with a song I’ll continue with a song. Most people know the Tom Petty song titled I WON’T BACK DOWN. The lyrics to Tom Petty’s song fits me, as Roulette Champion, perfectly. I’ll sing that song for you now.

Well, I won't back down
No, I won't back down
You can stand me up at the gates of hell
But I won't back down

Bill flashes a huge grin into the camera then he takes a seat in his chair again.

Bill:  Yes, Alex, you’ve heard the stories I’ve told of how Satan and my half-brother Chris Shipman couldn’t take me down and couldn’t take me out. That tells you all you need to know. If Satan failed to take me out, and he’s banned for eternity from challenging me for my soul again, what in the hell are you doing thinking that you can take me out? You’re an amateur! And when you take into consideration that I took Satan out you know I’m light years ahead of you in talent and ability. I don’t need to go into the details concerning my half-brother Chris Shipman as most people know the story and Chris is long gone and he knows better than to come after me again!

Bill reaches over to the table next to his chair and he picks up a sheet of paper.

SUPERMAN AND GREEN LANTERN AIN’T GOT NOTHING ON ME

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bill:  On this paper is printed the lyrics to the song SUNSHINE SUPERMAN by the singer Donovan. I won’t read the entire song lyrics but I will read one line of the lyrics to give you an idea how awesome I am. The lyrics go Superman or Green Lantern ain't got a-nothin' on me Did those simple lyrics hit home Alexander? I’m more than a mere man. I’m more than a mere wrestler. I’m a hell of a lot more talented than half the Sin City Wrestling roster combined. Do you think you can be the Kryptonite that takes me out like it takes out Superman? HAH! Dream on kid! Do you know what the one weakness of the Green Lantern was? FEAR. Yes, that’s it, that simple. Can you imagine being a superhero being taken over by fear when their job is to get into the face of fear and subdue the villains? I fear nothing so do you honestly think I fear you Raven? HAR HAR HAR!!! Without Kryptonite you cannot take out Superman. Without fear you cannot take out the Green Lantern. No matter what you bring with you to our match you don’t have Kryptonite or fear to try to take take me out!

Bea:  Well stated Bill.

SAY WHAT YOU MEAN AND MEAN WHAT YOU SAY

Bill: There are two types of people Alex. One is the type who says something but they either can’t back up what they say or they back down from what they said when the going gets tough for them. From my research, Alexander, I believe you’re dumb and could be legally classified as a moron. With me carrying a Genius IQ of 130 you need to believe what I say. I’ve said a lot leading up to our match and I know you’re asking yourself what I mean in the things I say and that’s expected as you’re too dense to understand what I’m talking about. Just as we have words in the English language that are spelled the same but pronounced differently so we have wrestlers who are classified as wrestlers but they perform differently. Take me as the perfect example. I’m an outstanding wrestler and I say what I mean and I mean what I say. Everyone knows what they’re going to get when they get assigned to a wrestling match with me. No fake stuff. No bullshit. No surprises. Just promises fulfilled. Just like having words spelled the same but pronounced differently is dumb so are wrestlers who can’t back up what they say and end up looking stupid and clumsy. Sorry I had to break the news to you like this but someone had to do it.

FOK U

Bill:  I attended Frankfort of Kentucky University and graduated with a Bachelor’s Degree in Business Administration and another Bachelor’s Degree in Criminal Justice. We also had great sports teams at Frankfort of Kentucky University especially in baseball and football. You know how some organizations use an acronym for their business or organization names? Examples are NBA for National Basketball Association, MLB for Major League Baseball, and NFL for National Football League. The acronym for Frankfort of Kentucky University was FOKU which we spelled as FOK-U. When we had sporting events and cheered on our team we would yell at our opponents FOK-U! FOK-U!!  FOK-U!!! The other teams, and the sanctioning organization for College sports, tried to ban us from using that acronym but they failed as it is the legal acronym for our school. So I say to you, Alexander Raven. . .  FOK-U! FOK-U!!  FOK-U!!!

Bill is unable to hold back his laughter. After a short time, though, he regains his composure and continues with his comments.

NO MATTER WHERE THE ROULETTE WHEEL STOPS

Bill:  Here’s some information for you Alexander. If the Roulette Wheel lands on a spot where only non-Hardcore wrestling is allowed I have the advantage as I’m a better wrestler than you are and there’s no way you can out-wrestle me. If the Roulette Wheel lands on a spot where it is Hardcore Rules then I have an even larger advantage as you’re not able to stand toe-to-toe with me and go blow-for-blow with me and survive in a Hardcore Rules match. If the Roulette Wheel lands on a spot where there are no rules and we fight it out until only one of us can still stand up I’ll easily win. Hell, Alex, if the Roulette Wheel were to land on the stipulations that me, the Roulette Champion, has to wrestle blindfolded and with one arm tied behind my back, while you’re not required to be blindfolded and with one arm tied behind your back, I’ll still whup your ass and walk away as the Roulette Champion.

Bea:  That’s the way to feed the truth to Alexander Raven.

Bill:  Alexander for damn sure when I get done with you there’ll be no need for you to go to the bathroom and take a dump for a week because I’m going to beat the shit out of you! Don’t think I can do it? Then you’re damn sure not thinking!

Bea:  Bill you sure are fired up when it comes to defending the Roulette Championship.

Bill:  Even more so when I have to defeat Alexander Raven again. When Blaze of Glory X takes place I’ll defeat Raven and lay the claim that I defeated his pathetic ass twice in 56 days. Gotta suck to be Alexander Raven to take a loss to me twice while challenging for the Roulette Championship. Good thing I’m not Alexander Raven.

BILL BARNHART’S SCHOOL OF HARD KNOCKS

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bill:  When you attend school, whether Elementary, Middle, or High School, you are taught how to find the answers. You don’t have teachers just handing you the answers. They teach you the skills to see an equation, situation, or event, and figure out the correct answer. Well, Alexander, I welcome you to Bill  Barnhart’s School of Hard Knocks. When you step into the ring with me you are the student and I’m your Master Teacher. The education session isn’t long so I have to get you to understand how to solve the equations and situations quickly. I already know you will fail to do the proper calculations and you’ll lose the match to me like you did in our previous match. As your Instructor in this match I’m not here to hand you all the answers. I’m not here to hand you half the answers. I’m not here to hand you any of the answers. I’m here to beat you down so hard that maybe, just maybe, somewhere in the future, you’ll enter a Championship match and be fully prepared for whatever might come your way during the match. Welcome to the Bill Barnhart School of Hard Knocks where I whack you with a stick and give you knots on your head in addition to your Diploma.

IRIS DOING IRIS THINGS

Iris gets up and walks into the other room. Curious to see what Iris is doing Bea walks to the other room to check on Iris. Bill is getting ready to continue his comments concerning his upcoming Roulette Championship match when Bea returns from the other room. We notice she has several magazines in her hand and Iris is following her back into the main area of the hotel room.

Bill:  Wow that was quick! What was Iris doing?

Bea:  She was flipping through the pages of these magazines.

Bill:  What’s wrong with Iris flipping through magazines?

Bea:  These are Cactus magazines. They are full of photos of Cactus plants.

Bill:  So it is a crime for Iris to look at photos of Cactus plants?

Bea:  Bill. . .these Cactus magazines are more than that. They’re for people, and I guess dogs like Iris, who want to have romantic fantasies about the Cactus. There are photos of Cactus in swimsuits lounging at the pool. There are photos of Cactus coming out of the shower with a towel wrapped around them. There’s more but I’m not going into those photos while we’re on camera. And to top it off I just noticed Cactus spines around her doggy bed. How in the hell did Cactus spines get in the room where her doggy bed is located?

Bill:  I guess you have to ask Iris.

Bea:  I figure either Pete the Cactus snuck into the room while we were out or he and Iris had some close encounters somewhere other than our hotel room and some of the spines stuck to her hair. What do you plan on doing about it?

Bill:  I’ll have a talk with Senor Vinnie and Pete the Cactus. I’m sure we’re not getting the entire story. To be fair I imagine Pete has doggy magazines with photos of English Bulldogs. Just a little bit of harmless stuff. I guess we can set up security cameras at home and when we’re in hotels to see if we can catch video of what Pete and Iris are doing when we’re not with them.

Bea rolls her eyes at Bill’s comments but she accepts his explanation and the actions they can take to try to catch Iris and Pete doing something they are not allowed to do. Bill returns his gaze into the camera.

YOU CAN’T HAVE POSSESSION OF MY ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHP

Bill:  No, Alexander, you can’t have possession of my Roulette Championship. Well, okay, that’s doesn’t mean a total ban on you having possession of my Roulette Championship but I’ll explain that to you and the viewers. Concerning you winning and taking possession of my Roulette Championship the answer is not only NO but HELL NO!!!  I’m going to defeat you and you have to live with that second loss to me. However, Raven, I’ll make an agreement with you if you’re a good boy and do what you’re told to do. If you want to temporarily hold my Roulette Championship in your hands I can make that arrangement for you. All you need to do is get a polishing cloth and clean and shine my Roulette Championship so it shines so brightly that people have to put on dark sunglasses to keep from having their eyes burned out from light reflecting off it. I’m willing to give you the assignment of being the official Roulette Championship cleaner and shiner. In your position as the official Roulette Championship cleaner and shiner you’re not permitted to place the Roulette Championship around your waist and pretend you’re Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion. Don’t think you could get away with doing that as there are security cameras everywhere. So if you wish to clean and shine my Roulette Championship we have an agreement. If I don’t hear from you I have many people waiting in line offering their services in that position.

Bea:  Damn! You sure are in one of those in-your-face moods Bill.

Bill:  Only because I have to face the same wrestler I already defeated in a successful Roulette Championship defense. I’m sure Management will soon figure a way to ensure my next challenger after Alexander Raven will be someone who can actually give me a good performance in our match. Oh well I can also wait for Hell to freeze over. . .HA HA HA HA HA!!!

Bea:  Bill you need to take a break as you’re too in-your-face right now. Iris you need to get back to your room and stop looking at suggestive photos of Cactus. I need to continue to play Referee around here to keep both of you in line. We’ve come to the closing comments for this presentation. Thanks for joining us today. Remember to come to Blaze of Glory X, or if you’re a long distance away to watch the even on television, so you’ll watch Bill successfully defend the Roulette Championship. . .

Bill:  . . .You mean MY Roulette Championship!

Bea:  Thanks for the correction Bill. Ahem. As I was saying either come to Blaze of Glory in person or watch it on television so you can watch Bill successful defend HIS Roulette Championship a second time against Alexander Raven. Remember I’ll be in Bill’s corner as his Manager and I’ll make sure nobody interferes in the match.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bill:  I’ll be done with my comments shortly but I need to clear something up for Alexander Raven and the other viewers. Just because our match is the first match on the Blaze of Glory X card doesn’t mean we’re a low-card no-interest boring match for the fans. Do you want to know why they placed our match as the first match to start off Blaze of Glory? Because Management knows I’m awesome and my performance in our match will set the tone for the rest of the matches at this event. They know the fans will be so shocked, amazed, and thrilled, to see me perform that their excitement will carry throughout Blaze of Glory all the way to the final match. But, Alex, before you think you’ll have anything to do with firing up the crowd in our opening match you need to sit back and shut the f*ck up! You’re nothing more than the target I’ll be destroying in our match. The fans will thrill to my outstanding wrestling abilities in the ring. The only thing they will be thrilled about concerning you is how badly I beat you down. I’m the Roulette Champion Wrestling God and you’re the sacrifice sent to me to devour and destroy. Damn your life sucks Alex!

Bea:  Well stated.

Bill:  Alexander there’s a saying that when you’re downwind of a pig farm you can smell the shit due to the wind blowing in your direction. Let me tell you something whelp. The other day while you were running your mouth talking nonsense bullshit and crap I was standing upwind from you and the stench from your lies came upwind and the smell was horrid. What the f*ck? You’re managing to talk a lot of shit but there’s a hell of a difference between talking shit and backing up the shit you say.

Bea:  You always back up what you say Bill.

Bill:  Alex there’s another thing I wish to admit publicly so that you’re fully informed and you understand that I say what I mean and mean what I say. With the current Sin City Wrestling male Roster there are three wrestlers I honestly don’t feel I could easily defeat. I’m not saying I could never defeat them because everyone can be defeated by someone. However since I’m an honest person, unlike you who is a liar, I admit that those three wrestlers would be the three toughest I’ve had to face since having to face my half-brother Chris Shipman. I assure you there’s no wrestler in the world today who is more disgusting, mean, vicious, evil, and violent, than my half-brother Chris Shipman. And with the fact that I’ve defeated my half-brother more times than he’s defeated me tells you that I can defeat the three wrestlers I’m speaking of in Sin City Wrestling. I’m sure, Raven, you want to know who those three wrestlers are right? I won’t tell you who those three are but I will tell you that you are not ten percent of what those three are.

Bea:  You’re being very generous stating Raven is ten percent of what those wrestlers are. In my eyes Alexander Raven isn’t one percent of what those three wrestlers are. Thanks for joining us today. See you at Blaze of Glory X on Sunday.

With Bill done with his comments Bea motions to the camera person they are done with their comments and the camera person cuts their camera feed and our screen goes dark.


168
Supercard Archives / Re: BULLDOG BARNHART (c) v ALEXANDER RAVEN - ROULETTE TITLE
« on: March 09, 2022, 09:32:23 AM »
* Senor Vinnie and Pete the Cactus used by permission of Gerrit *

AWESOME TO BE HONORED FOR MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart told everyone once he became Sin City Wrestling’s Roulette Champion he’s going to hang onto it for a long time. His upcoming Championship defense match is no exception. Bill told me there’s no way in Hell Alexander Raven is going to defeat him for the Roulette Championship.

SPECIAL BURGER TO HONOR BILL BARNHART

The scene changes and we are taken to the Burger King restaurant located at 5900 Sugarloaf Parkway in Lawrenceville, Georgia, which is about five miles from Bill and Bea’s home in Lawrenceville. We see Bill standing between two gentlemen while Bea remains off to the side. Many of the restaurant employees are also standing off to the side. We’re not sure what’s going on but we hope we find out soon.

Jose Cil:  Bill I’m Jose Cil and I’m the CEO of Restaurant Brands International which owns Burger King.

Tom Curtis:  And I’m Ton Curtis President of Burger King.

Jose Cil:  Bill you’ve proven yourself to be a tenacious wrestler, dedicated to the sport of wrestling, and you are the current Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion. We want to honor you so we came up with something special.

Tom Curtis:  We came up with a special Burger King burger to honor your reign as Roulette Champion. This special burger will be available in our restaurants until the end of 2022.

Jose Cil:  We came up with a large burger we customized to honor you and we are calling it the Bulldog Bill Barnhart burger also known as the BBB Burger. Tom please explain to Bill Barnhart what the BBB Burger consists of while we put up an image of the burger on the screen.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Tom Curtis:  Burger King’s BBB Burger is made with a three quarter pound flame-grilled beef burger. However for a very small fee we will make it a full one pound of flame-grilled beef. The large beef patty represents not only your Bill Barnhart’s physical size but also the size of the success of your entire wrestling career. It is topped a generous amount of American cheese which represents you being an All-American wrestler. The other items on the burger consist of onions, pickles, lettuce, and Burger King’s “special savory sauce” and it comes on a toasted sesame bun. These items on the burger represent your various angles, accomplishments, and dedication to the sport of wrestling. This special burger honors you because the Bill Barnhart Burger, also called the BBB Burger is what everyone wants, and more, in a burger and you, Bill Barnhart, is what everyone wants in a wrestler and more. The kicker is that you are their Roulette Champion.

The staff at this Burger King restaurant wheels out a cart with several BBB Burgers on it. Most are the three quarter pound variety and the remaining are the one pound variety.

Bill:  Wow! Thanks! This is a great honor. I appreciate you doing this for me.!Nice to know that until the end of 2022 when customers order the BBB Burger they’ll honor my accomplishments in the sport of wrestling.

Those in attendance at this ceremony cheer and clap and everyone is invited to devour a BBB Burger. Bill picks up one of the BBB burgers, the one pound variety of course, and he devours it. The smile on Bill’s face shows how satisfied he is with this special burger honoring him and his wrestling accomplishments.

Bill:  Thanks again for making this special burger to honor me. I can’t help but think what someone would do to try to honor the accomplishments of Alexander Raven who is my next opponent at Blaze of Glory X. I mean he has performed at an average level. He earned a chance to challenge me for my Roulette Championship then he lost his match to Matthew Knox in a match before he had to face me. Then Alexander lost to me in his desire to de-throne me at Roulette Champion. Then he won another qualifier match to get another shot at my Roulette Championship. I mean, come on, how average can a wrestler be and still squeak by and still get another shot at my Roulette Championship. Oh well. Guess not every wrestler can be as awesome as me.

DON’T STIR UP THE HORNET’S NEST

The scene shifts and we are taken to the home of Bill and Bea Barnhart in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The camera person is set up in their living room and Bill takes the center seat to air his comments for his upcoming Roulette Championship match against Alexander Raven and Bea and Iris are sitting one on each side of Bill.

Bill:  Have you watched videos of people who saw a Hornet’s nest and decided to attack it? Maybe they whacked it with a stick or threw rocks at it. Maybe they tried to build a fire and smoke the Hornets away. Maybe they turned a water hose on it and drenched the nest figuring the Hornets would leave. Some even tried using fireworks or other explosives. Want to know something Alex? All those attempts failed and the perpetrators got the shit stung out of them by the Hornets due to their stupidity in trying to take on and chase the Hornets away.

Bill makes a buzzing sound like that of a Hornet and then he makes a motion with his hand like a Hornet diving down and stinging the shit out of someone by slamming his hand into his arm.

Bill:  Alexander you’re obviously uninformed about general things, and even more uninformed about the sport of wrestling and the fact that you cannot defeat me. So I’m gonna tell you some valuable information. Did you know that once you attack a nest of Hornets, and they come out and see you, that your face is ingrained in their brains and the next time they see you, even if you aren’t attacking them, they remember your face and they’ll attack you because they remember what you previously did to them. Why did I tell you that information? I told you because you attacking me, whether verbally or physically, to try to get me to run away from you is not going to work just like all the stuff I mentioned that people attempted to get rid of Hornets didn’t work. I took your ass out and defeated you when you had your first shot at my Roulette Championship. Do you remember that match Alexander or have you conveniently downed enough alcohol and drugs to remove the memory of our match from your brain? It was on January 23, 2022, at Inception V. I successfully defended the Roulette Championship against you. The Roulette Wheel was given a hefty spin and it landed on the spot marked SUBMISSION ONLY. What a great spot for the Roulette Wheel to land on since I’m a master of submissions. And what did I do to you Raven? I made your pathetic self submit to my Barnhart Shoulder Breaker Flying Hammerlock. When Blaze of Glory X takes place on March 20, 2022, that match you lost to me on January 23, 2022, will have taken place 56 days before Blaze of Glory. Raven you’ve had 56 days to think about that loss. You’ve had 56 days of running the loss over and over in your mind, trying to figure out what you did wrong to cause your loss to me. Want to know what you did wrong Alexander? You showed up for the match! The only way you could have avoided a loss to me was to me would have been. . .oh. . .wait…there wasn’t any way you could have avoided a loss to me in that match. Simply put I kicked your ass and then put you in a painful hold and made you submit. Yes the answer really is that simple. Do you honestly believe you’re much better now than you were then? Do you think since our last match where you couldn’t take me out that you know have the audacity to think you can take me out at Blaze of Glory X instead of me taking you out again? Dream on punk! I’ll turn your dreams into nightmares!

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR AS YOU JUST MIGHT GET IT

Bill:  Alexander the saying goes: "Be careful what you wish for as you just might get it." It is meant as a warning that something someone desires might look great at first but then it proves to be problematic, undesirable, and possibly hazardous to their health, if their wish were to come true. Shall we examine that further?

Bill grins into the camera.

Bill:  Alexander you defeated two wrestlers at Climax Control 323 and you have another chance at me and my Roulette Championship. Shall we review your recent matches? You won a match to earn a shot at my Roulette Championship. However before your match against me you lost to Matthew “The Raven” Knox. How appropriate that one wrestler nicknamed RAVEN defeated you, with the name RAVEN, in that match.  After that loss you faced me for the Roulette Championship and you lost to me when I made you submit with my Barnhart Shoulder Breaker Flying Hammerlock. Now you face me again. So you failed the first time and now you believe you have a chance of winning this time? Nah! You failed the first time because you’re a pathetic wrestler compared to me. Since our previous match I’ve become more awesome in the wrestling ring while you’ve continued to deteriorate in your wrestling abilities. You’re going down in defeat at Blaze of Glory X. There you have it Raven. That’s what the main concept of BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR AS YOU JUST MIGHT GET IT is about. You wished for this match. . .now you’ve got this match. . .and you’ll again lose to me.

Bill flashes a larger grin into the camera.

Bill:  Alexander I’ve heard people, including you, talking backstage, during interviews, and during the time they present comments for their upcoming match. My friends also tell me what they’ve heard others say. The main item in their comments is they want to know why, in my Roulette Championship defense match against you, it took me so long to defeat you. They want to know why, if I’m as awesome as I claim to be, shouldn’t I have been able to defeat you quicker than I did? Good question and here’s my honest answers. I could have easily defeated you in less than five minutes. That would have been very amusing and fun for me but I’m not going to screw the fans by ending the match by defeating you in less than five minutes. The paid money to watch the wrestling matches and they want to be entertained and I entertained them at your expense. Alexander have watched a cat confront a mouse? You would expect a cat would be able to confront and destroy a mouse quickly. But what does the cat do? They know they’re in the superior position against the mouse. They know with one swipe of their claws the mouse is finished. They know if they pounce and bite the mouse that the mouse is no more in this life. The cat enjoys being entertained so they play with, and manipulate, the mouse to make the confrontation more enjoyable for them. Yeah, Alex, that’s what I did to you in our last match and that’s what I’m gonna do to you again at Blaze of Glory X.

SOME PEOPLE CLAIM I’M TOO OLD TO CONTINUE WRESTLING

Bill:  I hear the behind-the-back comments people make and most are made by fellow wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling. I turned 38 years of age on November 14, 2021, and people say I’m too old to wrestle. These same morons who make that statement are the same ones who watch professional wrestling and cheer on wrestlers who are over 50 years of age. You know who you are who do this. You know who those wrestlers are that you continue to cheer for even though they are way older than I am. You support wrestlers who are over 50 years of age and claim to be the undead and the undefeatable. You support wrestlers who are in their late-60’s who wear an outdated style of  moustache and rips off a thin tee-shirt to act tough. You support over-50 wrestlers who wear face paint probably because they’re too ugly to show their real face to the public. The list of wrestlers who are older than 50 years of age is a long one and you hypocrites cheer them on all the time. And yet you want to disrespect me for being 38 years of age.

Bill throws his hands up as a show of disbelief at the hypocrisy of others.

Bill:  Then you look at me and claim that at 38 years of age you feel I’m too old to continue wrestling and I should retire? To hell with that bullshit! I’m the Roulette Champion and to date nobody has been able to defeat me for the Championship. As I stated a moment ago you all are hypocrites as you’re not consistent in your behavior. If you think I’m too old to wrestle effectively I have a question and a challenge for you. The question is why you support and cheer for wrestlers who are over 50 years of age while at the same time you disrespect me for being only 38 years old? Here’s a challenge for you. If you honestly believe I’m too old for wrestling then try to do something about me legally earning the Roulette Championship. If you think you’ve got what it takes to take on, and defeat me, because I’m 38 years old, then bring your pathetic ass on and challenge for a shot at my Roulette Championship. You’ll regret your decision!

Bill motions with his hands in a gesture that says BRING IT ON.

Bill:  Bea would you like to make some comments before I start my Zoom meeting with Anthony Amey, the Sports Anchor at WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta?

Bea:  I don’t want to take up much of your air time Bill. I’ll simply state what an honor and pleasure it is for me to serve as your Manager for your upcoming match and the extreme honor serving as your wife. To be in your corner as your Manager is a privilege and honor that I take seriously. It is my pleasure to be at ringside to watch you destroy Alexander Raven.

Bill:  Thanks for your comments Bea.

QUESTION AND ANSWER TIME WITH ANTHONY AMEY

Anthony Amey the Sports Anchor at WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta starts the Zoom call and the feeds from both Anthony and Bill show up on the screen so viewers can see both sides of the conversation.

Anthony Amey:  Thanks for accepting my invitation to do a Zoom call for the benefit of our viewers.

Bill:  Always a pleasure to have a conversation with you Anthony.

Anthony Amey:  Viewers have been sending me questions they want you to answer. You’re one of their favorite wrestlers. Many of the our viewers put you up there in the same category as other Roulette Champions such as Kristopher Ryans, James Tuscini, Griffin Hawkins, and Alex Jones, when it comes to obtaining and retaining the Roulette Championship. Are you ready for their questions?

Bill:  Let’s do this!

Anthony Amey:  Are you left handed or right handed?

Bill:  Right handed.

Anthony Amey:  Do you like Coffee or Tea?

Bill:  Coffee. But let me add this to my answer. I want my coffee black, straight up, no cream, no sugar, no additives. I want my coffee with a caffeine level so high that it reaches out of the cup, talks to me, and slaps me across the face. Nothing like a strong straight up coffee to start my day.

Anthony Amey:  Your answer gave me a great mental image. Do you prefer dogs or cats?

Bill:  Dogs of course! That’s why I have my baby girl Iris the English Bulldog.

Iris perks up when she hears Daddy Bill mention her name.

Anthony Amey:  Do you prefer Standard Rules wrestling, Hardcore Rules wrestling, or Anything Goes No Rules wrestling?

Bill:  It depends on my opponent. If I have someone who is trained in Standard wrestling it is nice to face them in a match that fits their style of wrestling as I’m a great all-around wrestler. If my opponent is primarily a Hardcore style wrestler then having Hardcore Rules or an Anything Goes match is easy for me as I can wrestle in any type of match and be successful.

Anthony Amey:  Burgers or Pizza?

Bill:  Since Burger King just created the BBB Burger, which stands for Bulldog Bill Barnhart burger, I would say burgers. But as you know, Anthony, one of the fundraising contests I do against Iris is a Pepperoni Pizza eating contest. Hmmm. Maybe I can bring in a new event where me and Iris compete in a burger eating contest, using my BBB Burger, to raise funds for good causes.

Anthony Amey:  Do you like sports such as Football, Basketball, and Baseball?

Bill:  Not really. I prefer wrestling.

Anthony Amey:  What is your go-to comfort food?

Bill:  Wow! I have so many My main go-to comfort foods include Pepperoni pizza, hamburgers with all the fixings, burritos, tacos, and enchiladas.

Anthony Amey:  We’re at the last question from our viewers. What is your thoughts on Alexander Raven?

Bill:  I noticed the question from the viewer was stated as what are my thoughts on Alexander Raven. I’ll interpret their question as they want to know what I really think about Alexander Raven so that’ll be the context of my response. Alexander Raven is an over-rated bratty punk. He won a match to get a shot at my Roulette Championship then he lost his match against Matthew Knox before his match with me to challenge for the Roulette Championship. Then Raven lost to me in his bid to earn the Roulette Championship away from me. Then recently he won a Triple Threat to get another shot at my Roulette Championship. This upcoming match for Alexander will have the same result as our previous Roulette Championship match which is I win and Alexander Raven loses.

Anthony Amey:  That’s all the questions from our viewers. Do you mind taking some questions from me?

Bill:  I’ll always take your questions Anthony.

Anthony Amey:  Do you have any concerns about Pete the Cactus dating your English Bulldog Iris?

Bill:  Only that I think Pete often takes advantage of Iris in the dating department. Iris is fixed so she cannot get pregnant so I don’t have concerns about that. My biggest concern with Pete is that I feel he’s a playboy and that he might be misleading Iris and might try to corrupt her. If that turns out to be the case Pete will get a stern talking to from me.

Anthony Amey:  Are you and Vinnie continuing on in the Mixed Tag Team Division where your Mixed Tag Team consists of either you and Bea or Senor Vinnie and Bea or do you have other plans?

Bill:  I like the idea that we can mix it up in the Mixed Tag Team Division. However, Anthony, I’ve heard Vinnie talking about one of the Bombshells showing interest in teaming with him in the Mixed Tax Team Division. I wouldn’t mind that but if it ended up that me and Bea had to face Vinnie and his partner it would feel awkward.

Anthony Amey:  Here is my final question. Do you feel bad that for a long period of time Sin City Wrestling hasn’t allowed Iris to be involved in stuff going on in the arenas and do you hope they will lift that restriction soon?

Bill:  I feel bad for Iris as she’s feeling lonely when me and Bea leave our hotel room and go to the arena for wrestling events. She doesn’t know we’re working when all she wants to do is get attention and love from us. I assure you once the restrictions on having Iris in the arena with us is lifted Iris will be back at ringside when Bea is serving as my Manager.

Anthony Amey:  Thanks for taking questions from the viewers and from me Bill. Always a pleasure to have you on my program.

Bill:  The pleasure is entirely mine Anthony. Thanks!

The Zoom video call with Anthony Amey ends.

CLOSING COMMENTS TO CLOSE ALEXANDER RAVEN’S WRESTLING CAREER

Bill returns to looking into the camera.

Bill:  Alexander I’ll make my closing comments short. Not really much left for me to say to inform people you suck but still it is nice to make closing comments. You suck. You’re pathetic in the ring. I defeated you by submission. You can round up every good-luck charm on the planet and that wouldn’t be enough for you to win this upcoming match against me. You can visit a Voodoo lady and have her cast a spell on me to make me falter but that won’t work. If Satan couldn’t take me out there’s no way some Voodoo lady can get the job done. We will not know the rules and stipulations of our Roulette Championship match until the Roulette Wheel stops spinning and lands on one of the spots to inform us what type of match we’ll have. I don’t give a damn what the Roulette Wheel lands on because I’m an awesome wrestler who can deal with anything, at any place, at any time, and come out the winner. I hope you’ll still have enough courage to show up for our match at Blaze of Glory X and actually start our match when the bell rings. I’ll accept a default win over you if you chicken out and fail to show for our match but I’d rather you show up so everyone can watch me destroy you. That’s it. Thanks for joining me today.

Bea gives the CUT sign to the camera person and they call into the Network and the Network tells them to turn off their camera and they do and our screen goes dark.


169
Climax Control Archives / I WILL BLIND YOU WITH MY SHINE
« on: February 23, 2022, 06:18:02 PM »
* Senor Vinnie and Pete the Cactus used by permission of Gerrit *

I WILL BLIND YOU WITH MY SHINE

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart has a match scheduled for Climax Control 324 against Mercedes Vargas. This is the second time Bea is facing off against Mercedes so we will see how she does this time around.

CLEAN UP ON AISLE THREE

We are taken back about one year when Bea Barnhart was shopping at the Kroger Grocery Store located at 950 Herrington Road in Lawrenceville, Georgia, which is near the home of her and Bill and Iris. Bea is pushing her shopping cart up and down the aisles looking for the items on her shopping list. She turns the corner and starts to go down Aisle Three when she is blocked by the cart of a woman shopper. Although the aisles in Kroger are wide enough for two carts to pass each other this woman shopper had her cart in a position that blocked Bea from going down the aisle. Bea, being a nice person, politely asks the woman to move her cart so she can get by.

Bea:  Excuse me? Could you please move your shopping cart a bit so I could get by?

The woman shopper is either ignoring Bea or she cannot hear Bea talking to her so Bea again asks her but in a louder voice.

Bea:  Excuse me! Could you please move your shopping cart a bit so I could get by?

Again the woman either cannot hear Bea or she is deliberately ignoring her. Bea goes a bit louder this time.

Bea:  Excuse me! Could you please move your shopping cart a bit so I could get by?

For the third time the woman fails to respond and move her cart. Bea reaches out and gently moves the woman’s shopping cart about one foot so she can get her own cart past the woman’s cart. This is when the woman gets upset and responds.

Woman Shopper:  What the hell are you doing? You don’t touch my shopping cart! Who do you think you are?

Bea:  Excuse me but I politely asked you to please move your shopping cart so I could get by and you apparently ignored me. So I moved your car1 one foot so I could get my cart by and you have a problem with that? It isn’t your cart anyway as it belongs to Kroger! And, by the way, I’m Bea Barnhart, one of the Superstar wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling Federation.

The angry woman shopper takes offense to Bea and she charges at Bea but Bea easily side-steps the woman’s attack which causes the woman to slam into the shelves in the aisles and items fall off the shelf onto the store floor. The woman gets up and again tries to hit Bea but Bea easily out-maneuvers the woman. The woman again charges at Bea but Bea ducks under her attempt and flips the ignorant woman over her head where she lands in her own shopping cart causing the shopping cart to flip over and lands on top of the angry woman who is nearly unconscious now. The Assistant Manager of Kroger walks down the aisle and informs Bea they have the incident she had with the woman on surveillance camera if she wishes to sue the woman for her attack. Bea tells the Assistant Manager that kicking the woman’s ass is enough punishment for the woman. Bea continues her shopping with a smile on her face while the Assistant Manager makes an announcement for his Employees over the announcing system.

Kroger Assistant Manager:  Can I have several employees to clean up the spill on Aisle Three? Thanks!

Bea hears the Assistant Manager’s announcement of the spill to be cleaned up on aisle three and she cannot help but burst out laughing.

Bea:  HA HA HAR!!! That will teach others that you don’t take me lightly and you damn sure don’t attack me!

Bea continues shopping as the scene fades out.

LAYING OUT THE TRUTH TO MERCEDES. . .

The scene switches and we are in the hotel room of Bea and Bill Barnhart. The camera person is already set up and ready to broadcast Bea’s comments for her upcoming match. Bea and Bill have a very nice room that includes a small sauna area. Bill is running around searching for Iris as she seems to have gone hiding on him again. While Bill hunts down Iris to get her to stay out of trouble Bea sits down on the couch to present her comments for her upcoming match with Mercedes Vargas.

Bea:  So, Mercedes, we meet again. It looks like Management has an interest in me to move up and start challenging for Championships again. I know what you’re probably thinking Mercedes. We had one match a long time ago. It was at Climax Control 277 on August 23, 2020. Since I started my wrestling career in January 2020 I didn’t have many matches when we met at Climax Control 277. I know you want to take me lightly because I don’t have as many wins as you have over your long career but taking me lightly will cause you to lose our upcoming match. I remember an incident where some jerk woman shopper at Kroger Grocery Store thought I wasn’t a threat when I politely asked her to move her shopping cart and she refused to move it. Then when I moved her cart a mere one foot so I could move my cart down the aisle she wasn’t just verbal in her assault on me for touching “her” cart. She decided to lunge at me and attack me. I easily side-stepped her pathetic attempts to inflict harm on me and I left her laying on the floor of Aisle Three while I continued shopping. Do you want to take me lightly Mercedes? You can talk about the matches I haven’t won lately but looking at your performance lately you’re not doing much better than me. That changes this Sunday evening when I soundly defeat you and move up in the rankings while you get defeated and move down in the rankings.

WHERE’S IRIS?

Bill walks around the hotel room continuing to look for Iris. Bea is not happy that Bill is walking through her camera shot.

Bea:  What’s up with you looking for Iris? This hotel room isn’t exceptionally large so there can’t be many places where Iris can hide. Are you sure you didn’t leave the door open and she might be out in the hallway roaming around?

Bill:  I’m sure Iris is inside the hotel room hiding. I think she believes I’m going to take her for a bath and you know how she gets when it is bath time. I’ll continue having a look around. . .

Bill is interrupted in mid-sentence by a loud knocking on the hotel room door. Bill answers the door to see Senor Vinnie at the door. Bill invites Vinnie in. Vinnie, Bill, and Bea, get into a conversation about Iris.

Bea:  Ahem! Boys! Please make this quick as I’m airing comments for my match at Climax Control 324.

Senor Vinnie:  Bill have you seen Pete? I’ve looked everywhere for him but can’t find him. I thought maybe he was here visiting Iris.

Bill:  Nope. Pete isn’t here. In fact I’ve been looking everywhere for Iris. She’s usually good at hiding from me when she thinks I’m going to give her a bath but this seems to be something different.

As Bill and Vinnie look around the room they hear a noise coming from the small sauna in their hotel room. Bill, Vinnie, and Bea, look over at the door to the sauna. The door slowly opens and they see Pete the Cactus strut out of the sauna with a towel wrapped around him and he’s humming to himself. Pete is smoking a cigar he is holding in one hand and sipping a mixed drink he is holding in his other hand. Right after Pete comes out of the sauna Iris walks out and she has a small towel on her head and another one around her backside and she has a huge grin on her face. Bill looks at Vinnie and Vinnie looks at Bill and then the two of them and Bea look at Pete and Iris.

Bill:  Iris!!!

Senor Vinnie:  Pete!!!

Bill:  Come on Vinnie! You need to get control of Pete!

Senor Vinnie:  What? As if Iris is under control? You need to focus on getting her under control also. I think Iris is corrupting Pete.

Bill:  Iris? Corrupting Pete? More like the other way around! You know how the saying goes right? Driving Pete to be corrupt is a very short drive.

Bill and Vinnie realize they honestly aren’t going to control either Iris or Pete, as those two will do whatever they want, so they burst out laughing, then high five each other, shake hands, and then they look at Bea who has a stern look on her face.

Bea:  Iris! Pete! You two get over here now! Bill! Vinnie! You two get over here also!

Pete and Iris slowly walk over and stand in front of Bea. Bill and Vinnie stand a bit away from Bea not knowing how upset she really is.

Bea:  Iris you get in your room and get ready for bed now! How dare you scare us like that going into the sauna with Pete without letting us know where you were. And as for you, Pete, you go with Senor Vinnie, and get back to your hotel room. I’m going to deal with you and Iris tomorrow. And as for you, Bill, and you  Vinnie, you two need to watch over Iris and Pete more closely than you’re doing. If you don’t take control of Pete and Iris I’ll damn sure take control of all of you! Sheesh! Now you four get out of here so I can continue with my comments for my upcoming match.

Vinnie takes Pete and they leave the hotel room to return to their own room. Bill walks off with Iris to bring her into her room to settle in for the evening. The camera returns to focus on Bea.

LAYING OUT THE TRUTH TO MERCEDES. . .CONTINUED

Bea:  Well I took care of those four quickly. And on Sunday evening I’m going to take care of you quickly Mercedes. In fact an incident that I observed recently near our home in Lawrenceville, Georgia, is a perfect representation of how unobservant and uncaring you are.

Bea picks up a bottle of iced tea and takes a drink.

Bea:  I believe the laws concerning Police chasing someone in their car, or a fire truck or ambulance on a call, with sirens blaring, is universal. When you’re driving and you hear a siren from an emergency vehicle you are to stop and give them way. Even more important is that if you are at an intersection and you hear the sirens you’re to stay put and not cross the intersection as the emergency vehicles have the right of way.

Bea drinks more iced tea before continuing.

Bea:  Here’s an incident me and Bill observed about a month ago while we were driving down Herrington Road and we were at the intersection of Herrington Road and Cruse road. We were stopped at the red light on Herrington. We could clearly hear numerous sirens blaring so we knew either a fire truck, ambulance, or police car, was coming toward the intersection but we didn’t know from which direction. About fifteen seconds later it was clear the sirens were coming from Cruse road toward the intersection with Herrington Road where we were located. At that time the signal for us on Herrington Road was red and the signal for Cruse Road was green. Then the signal changed to where it was red for Cruse Road and green for Herrington Road where we were located. Although we had the green light on Herrington Road the law states the emergency vehicles with their sirens and lights on have the right of way and can go through the intersection even though the light for them was red. The law states to stay where you are and not attempt to cross an intersection when you hear sirens even though you have the green light. So what does the car in front of us do? They hit the gas and fly into the middle of the intersection just when the Ambulance comes up Cruse Road to go through the intersection. The driver of the car that drove into the intersection freaked out when they say the Ambulance so they hit their brakes stopping in the middle of the intersection and nearly got broadsided by the Ambulance. That’s pure stupidity on their part. That’s moronic behavior not understanding what could have happened to them. It is an arrogant mindset and it could have ended up with them getting seriously injured or killed.

Bea finishes her iced tea.

Bea:  Why did I tell you that incident Mercedes? I told you that incident because you’re like the dumb ass driver who failed to obey the laws and nearly got themselves injured or killed. They didn’t stay put in their car. They heard the sirens like we did. They decided to cross the intersection just as the ambulance came hurtling through the intersection. Then when these jerks realized they made a huge mistake they got so scared that instead of clearing the intersection they slammed on their brakes and stopped in front of the ambulance and nearly got broadsided. So, Mercedes, if you want to be like that driver who made a hazardous maneuver that could have ended horribly bad for them then do so. If you want to fail to obey the rules and laws then do so. If you make a decision that puts you in harm’s way then do so. Just remember that whatever you do I’ll counter it and take advantage of your mistakes and take you out. I’m on the move up the ladder of success and Management has taken notice of me. You, on the other hand, are well beyond your expiration date and you need to be disposed of like a container of out-of-expiration-date spoiled milk.

LOOK TO THE FUTURE…DON’T DWELL ON THE PAST

Bea:  I’ve noticed something about you Mercedes. From the comments I hear from other wrestlers they also noticed it. You dwell on the past. I admit you had a very nice past and held many Championships and some of them for a long reign. However, recently, you’ve been losing a lot of matches. You seem to forget that there is a thing called the future and the future isn’t always kind when it comes to aging wrestlers. When you held all those Championships and were able to successfully defend them you were younger. Now as you’re getting older you seem to dwell on the past as you have nothing from the present to brag about and damn sure you have nothing in your future that you can be proud of.

Bea flashes a huge grin into the camera.

Bea:  Mercedes if you happen to get a win over me in our match I’ll be honest and go public and commend you on the victory. But, Mercedes, that is a huge IF you can defeat me. However when I defeat you everyone will see you do what you always do when you lose a match. You get on camera and Twitter and bitch, moan, complain, and claim the loss you took was invalid even though your opponent legally defeated you. Then you will go off and list all the Championships you’ve held, how long you held them, and how, overall, have a better list of accomplishments than everyone else on the Roster. That’s a major difference between us Mercedes. Where you have to boast about things that used to be. . .you have to brag about past accomplishments. . .you have to claim your opponent didn’t legally defeat you. . .I tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. You need to be damn glad they don’t hook you up to a Polygraph machine because with all the lies you tell the Lie Detector machine would explode.

Bea bursts out laughing then regains her composure to continue with her comments.

Bea:  Be honest with yourself Mercedes. Stop trying to be what you were years ago. You don’t have now what you had then. All your smack talk won’t get you a win in our match. All your smack talk won’t get you shots at Championships. All your smack talk will get you is a beat down and having my hand raised in victory. You are the past of Sin City Wrestling and I’m the future of Sin City Wrestling. Deal with it!

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments for today. The camera person calls into the Network and they tell them to cut their camera feed and they do and our screen goes black.


170
Climax Control Archives / BLAST FROM THE PAST TOURNAMENT QUALFIER MATCH
« on: February 09, 2022, 09:20:40 AM »
BLAST FROM THE PAST TOURNAMENT QUALIFIER

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart and Masque are facing Kat Jones and Mark Cross in the Blast From The Past Tournament. Winning this Qualifier match advances Masque and Bill into the next round of the Tournament on their way to winning the Tournament.

SHOPPING AT KROGER SUPERMARKET

The scene on our screen changes and we see Bill Barnhart at the Kroger Supermarket on the corner of Cruse Road and Herrington Road in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The camera person assigned to Bill follows him around the store while he shops.

Bill:  While most wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling like to show you their sparring matches, or them having a drinking party where they get drunk, or male wrestlers intimidating and attacking women, or some other things that come across as the same old thing being the same old thing, I’m original, and honest, and willing to show you my real life adventures in addition to my wrestling abilities. Although I’m a wrestler in Sin City Wrestling I’m also a citizen of the community where I live. I shop at this Kroger Supermarket in Lawrenceville all the time. When I’m purchasing a lot of items I’ll drive my vehicle here to load my purchases in. If I only have a few items to get the walk from our house to this Kroger Supermarket is about five minutes. So please sit back and relax and watch me shop as I enjoy shopping. I’ll get to my comments concerning our Blast From The Past Tournament match at Climax Control 322 after I return home from shopping.

While going up and down the aisles Bill sees a young mother with three kids ranging from 1 year old to maybe 4 to 6 years old. She is looking up toward the top shelves, and it is obvious she is not tall enough to reach items on the top shelf, even more so with three young kids to attend to, so Bill stops to offer assistance.

Bill:  Hi. Is there anything I could help you get from the top shelf since you have three small children to watch while you’re shopping?

Woman:  DOES IT LOOK LIKE I NEED HELP?

Bill:  Geez! No need to be a asshole about it! I’m just trying to help out in case you need something off the top shelf. It is hard for anyone to reach up to the shelves and even more so when you have three young children to take care of while shopping.

Woman:  I DON’T NEED YOUR F*CKING HELP!

Bill:  What? Gawd! I hope you’re not married! Wouldn’t want to know that some poor man has to put up with your bitchy attitude all the time. This is the thanks I get for offering assistance to you? That’s messed up!

The woman storms off down the aisle and disappears when she turns the corner. Bill continues his shopping and when he turns down one of the aisles to browse the products he sees the woman again and this time she’s on her cell phone. Since she’s talking with a man on speaker mode Bill assumes the person she’s talking to is her husband. Bill stops and listens to the conversation.

Woman: THERE’S SOME GUY HERE IN KROGER ASKING ME IF I NEED HELP TO GET SOMETHING OFF THE TOP SHELF. DO I LOOK LIKE I NEED F*CKING HELP? WHY DON’T YOU COME HERE TO KROGER AND KICK HIS ASS!

Knowing the woman is on speaker talking with her husband and telling him to come down to Kroger to confront him and attack him Bill gets into the conversation.

Bill:  Ooooo so you’re telling your husband to come to Kroger and attack me huh? Yeah come on down here and try to attack me and I’ll lay your ass out in the aisle while your smart ass wife watches. I did nothing wrong except offer to get something off the top shelf for her as she has your three young children with her while she’s shopping. Your wife goes off on me, then you go off on me, then you threaten me? Bring it on because if you lay a finger on me I’ll knock you out and you’ll be arrested by the police.

Bill listens for the woman to confirm that her husband is coming down to attack me. After Bill hears her tell her husband not to come down to Kroger as he is likely to get hurt badly by Bill the woman hangs up the phone and tries to apologize to Bill.

Woman:  Uh. . .uh. . .I’m really sorry about what happened. It isn’t easy to do grocery shopping with three small children coming along. My husband isn’t much help taking care of them. Can we just part and go our own way and forget this happened?

Bill agrees as he feels bad that the husband of this woman is a jerk. The woman walks to the checkout lane to check out. Bill continues shopping and when he’s done he goes through the self-checkout and pays for his items. The camera person follows Bill into the parking lot. After Bill loads his Hyundai Santa Fe with his purchases the camera person gets into their car to follow Bill to his home where they will continue to air Bill’s comments for his Blast From The Past Tournament match.

BACK AT BILL’S HOME

Bill and the camera person arrive at Bill’s home in a very short time since Kroger Supermarket is less than a half mile from his home. Bill brings his purchases into the house while the cameraman sets up their equipment in the living room. The camera goes live and the camera person focuses on Bill as he puts his purchases away. When Bill is done he walks over and sits on the couch. Bill is then joined by his wife, Bea, and their English Bulldog Iris, on the couch.

Bill:  Iris I need to ask you something before I go into my comments for my upcoming match. When Pete the Cactus called you for a video call this morning how come I heard the music YOU ROCKED ME ALL NIGHT LONG by AC/DC play?

Iris turns her face away from Daddy Bill.

Bill:  I know you were in the house all night but for you to have that song play when Pete calls you for a video call is not appropriate as it gives people the idea some stuff is going on that shouldn’t be going on. So, Iris, what are you gonna do about it?

Iris lets out a groan then shoves her head under Daddy Bill’s arm and Bill pets her and Iris calms down and lays her head on Daddy Bill’s lap.

Bea:  Iris we’ll have a talk later. Right now Daddy Bill needs to air comments on his upcoming match.

Iris:  *SIGH*

THE KEY IN THE BLAST FROM THE PAST TOURNAMENT IS HAVING AN OUTSTANDING TAG TEAM PARTNER

Bill:  Holy Sh*t Batman!!! I knew Masque was talented, interesting, dark, and aggressive, but now after hearing her comment on our upcoming Blast From The Past Tournament match against Kat Jones and Mark Cross. . .well. . .I guess the only thing I can say is I feel a bit sad for Mark and Kat having to face our team. Sure is a great feeling to have a fantastic Tag Team partner in Masque.

Bea:  I echo your comments Bill.

Bill:  I want everyone to know how thrilled I was when the drawing of names to create Tag Teams for the Blast From The Past Tournament gave me Masque as my partner. For those who may not have seen Masque in action I’ll give you an idea what she’s about. Everyone is familiar with the ZZ Top song LEGS. The lyrics of the song go She's got legs, she knows how to use them, She never begs, she knows how to choose them.  I’ve modified their lyrics to fit my fantastic tag team partner Masque. My version goes She’s got skills, she knows how to use them. She never begs, she knows how to choose them. Masque proved that against Kaiju Rainbow recently. I’m confident when the Bombshells get tagged into our match Masque will make quick work of Kat Jones and we’ll win the Blast From The Past Tournament match then  go on to win the overall Tournament.

Bea:  I can see Masque applying the Mandible Claw on Kat. Then the next thing is that Mark, who is freaking out over the loss in the match, will violate the rules to try to get Masque to release the Mandible Claw she has on Kat. Unfortunately that will either lead to a Disqualification of their team or Bill getting tagged in and whupping the crap out of Mark Cross.

Bill:  Some people get paired up with a partner who is totally insane and blows the match for them. Some get paired up with someone who is violent but lacks other skills in the ring and they blow the match for them. Others get paired with someone who cheats and gets their team disqualified. The list goes on for a long way. But me? I got teamed with Masque. She’s a great all-around wrestler. She has great wrestling skills. Some try to classify her as possibly insane. Some claim she might be too violent in the ring. There are some who make claims that she cheats. I’ve done research and I find that Masque may be a little bit of each of those but she has something that maybe one in ten wrestlers has. What is that you ask? The ability to focus on winning wrestling matches. The ability to take out opponents. The ability to intimidate others. The ability and desire to win. Masque is a unique wrestler in that she is everything you want her to be but if you’re her opponent she is everything you wish she was not. I was blessed in the draw for teams for the Blast From The Past Tournament with the draw of Masque as my partner.

Bea:  I totally agree with you Bill. Would you tell the viewers why you’re different from most wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling?

Bill:  I don’t copy other wrestlers. I have my own style and I do my own thing. I’m one who became successful because I don’t back down from anyone. I don’t back down from anything. Nothing intimidates me. I stand up and take the fight to my opponents. I won’t go into an overly long dissertation on what happened to create me as I am but I’ll present the two incidents that made me what I am today.

Bea:  Kat and Mark need to pay attention to these incidents so they’ll understand why they’ll lose to Bill and Masque.

WHAT DOESN’T KILL YOU MAKES YOU STRONGER

Bill:  I spent ten years fending off the murder intentions of my half-brother Chris Shipman. That’s not a figure of speech people. He wanted to literally murder me as he got found guilty in a Court of Law for the death of our sister and he tried to blame her death on me. I’m still here and doing great and Chris Shipman hasn’t been heard from since we both left the previous wrestling federation we worked in. That should tell you all you need to know about me and what I’m about.

Bea:  Tell them about your confrontations with Satan.

Bill:  When I worked in another wrestling federation, where my half-brother Chris Shipman also worked, Satan came to me annually to challenge me for my soul for eternity. Satan failed nine years in a row. Of course Satan came back the next year and I told him this has to be the last time he challenges me for my soul. He agreed and we had a binding contract. The bottom line was that  if Satan were to win this time and obtain my soul then I’m his to do with what he wants. If I win Satan is denied the opportunity to challenge me for my soul again for eternity. You all think Satan is extremely intelligent but he isn’t. I told him if I allow him to have his minions be on the voting crew to decide who wins our contest then he has to allow me to be the one to choose the challenge we have to perform in order to try to win. Proving he wasn’t thinking clearly that evening he agreed. Satan called one hundred of his minions to vote on our contest. I told Satan we had to have a dance-off. Satan roared with laughter because he felt this was an easy contest for him to win but I knew I was going to win. I even allowed Satan to go first. He did his dance routine and then I did mine. I did my dance routine to the music SHAKE YOUR BOOTY. When I was done me and Satan stood there waiting for his minions to vote on who would win. When the results were tallied on the vote by the minions they stated they gave seventy-five votes for Satan to win. Figuring he had won the contest to obtain my soul Satan started laughing uncontrollably. Unfortunately, for him anyway, when the minions then gave their vote on my performance and they gave me ninety of their one hundred votes. Yes I defeated Satan by fifteen votes and the votes came from Satan’s minions. I looked at Satan and reminded him of our agreement and since I won the tenth contest out of ten contests against him the agreement is he can never challenge me for my soul again for eternity. So, Mark and Kat, if you two piss ants think I’m intimidated by you then you’re more ignorant than I thought you were!

Bea:  That’s part of the reason Bill is confident in wrestling and life in general. Defeating one of the most deranged and mentally twisted persons in his half-brother Chris Shipman and defeating Satan for eternity is empowering. Bill are you going to tell the viewers the amusing thing you told me the other day about a child and a balloon?

Bill:  You’ve all seen a child with a balloon. They’re holding the string, smiling, happy, and admiring the balloon, then someone comes along with a pin and pops the balloon. The look on the child’s face is priceless! In an instant they went from having fun to being sad. . .having it all to having nothing. . .happy with the world to mad at the world but not able to do a damn thing about it. Yep! So, Mark and Kat, that’s how you two are going to feel when me and Masque defeat you. POP!!!

PAST HISTORY

Bill:  I wish to talk to you, Mark, for a moment. I’m an honest person so I’ll continue in my honesty concerning the history we have against each other. Our first match against each other was on August 4, 2019, at Climax Control 244. I lost to you by pinfall and I salute you on that win. Our second match against each other was on November 3, 2019, at Climax Control 251, and again you won over me by pinfall. So we enter our Blast From The Past match with you 2-0 against me. But, Mark, before you crow like a horny Rooster after the Hens those matches were over two years ago. Things have changed during that time for both of us. I see you were World Champion for about five weeks and that you won the Blast From The Past Tournament on April 12, 2020. But, alas, that was then and this is now. While you were a short-time Champion I have held the Roulette Championship since October 3, 2021. So shall we compare Championships for just a moment? You have around five weeks as World Champion and I’ll reach 133 days on the day we participate in Climax Control 322. Hell of a big difference comparing our Championship reigns eh?. If you want to bring up my Blast From The Past history from 2021 you’re welcome to do so. I would have easily won the Tournament had I not been teamed with a partner who spent all her time disrespecting me and throwing the match. This year the Tournament is different. I have a great partner who is talented, powerful, agile, and aggressive, and I know she has my back in the match and she knows I have hers.

Bea:  I had a match against Kat Jones at Climax Control 319 on December 12, 2021 by pinfall. Kat is a good wrestler but my observation is that Masque is a fantastic wrestler. I see Bill and Masque with an easy win in this match.

Bill:  I agree with you that our team will have the win in this match but I’m also aware that Kat Jones and Mark Cross are not going to do the trained dog routine of roll over and play dead. The key is to go into this match with confidence, a respect for my partner Masque, and the ability to tag in and out of the match to allow both of us to have the opportunity to pick up the win and move along in the Blast From The Past Tournament.

THE BOTTOM LINE

Bill:  In the world of finance the term BOTTOM LINE refers to the final totals after the accounting is done. If you have a profit on the bottom line they say you are IN THE BLACK but if you have a deficit on the bottom line it means you have taken a loss and you are IN THE RED.

Bea:  And the bottom lines for this match are?

Bill:  The bottom line for me and Masque is we have a huge profit and will win and move on in the Blast From The Past Tournament. We’ll continue winning until we’re the last team standing. But, Kat and Mark, you have a huge deficit which means you two are taking the loss and going home to watch our team continue on, and win, the Blast From The Past Tournament.

Bill informs the camera person he is done presenting his comments and the camera person calls into the Network to let them know. The Network cuts the feed to the camera person and returns to their regular programming for this time slot.


171
Climax Control Archives / NO MERCY
« on: February 02, 2022, 08:48:44 AM »
I’LL HAVE NO MERCY ON KAIJU RAINBOW

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart is scheduled for a match against Kaiju Rainbow for Climax Control 321. Bill is not performing at this Climax Control but he will be in his Blast From the Past Tournament match at Climax Control 322. Bill has Climax Control 321 off but he will be at the arena to watch Bea in her match.

AT RANDY’S PERENNIALS & WATER GARDENS IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

The scene opens and we see Bea Barnhart, and her English Bulldog Iris, at Randy's Perennials & Water Gardens located at 523 West Crogan Street in Lawrenceville, Georgia.

Bea:  Let’s look around Iris, I want to find Fig trees that have the Figs that are purple inside. I think the fruit trees are down this direction.

Bea and Iris start walking down the walkway to where the fruit trees are located. When Bea and Iris pass the section where the succulents are located Iris stops and won’t move even though Bea is pulling on her leash. Bea continues pulling but Iris won’t budge. When Bea looks at Iris she notices Iris is staring at numerous Cactus and we assume that keys here to think about her boyfriend Pete the Cactus.

Bea:  Sorry Iris but those Cactus are not Pete. You’ll be with him soon enough. Come on! We need to get to the section with fruit trees. I want to purchase several Fig trees that bear Figs with that are purple inside.

Iris reluctantly follows Bea but she keeps looking back at the Cactus and moans and cries.

BEA AND IRIS RETURN TO THEIR HOME IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

Bea and Iris return home and Bill comes downstairs to greet them as they enter the house. Iris runs upstairs and Bill is surprised how quickly the can move when she wants to.

Bill:  I guess Iris went to get on her laptop to have a video call with Pete the Cactus. Did you find the purple Fig trees?

Bea:  They didn’t have them in stock but they’ll come in shortly.

Bill:  Okay. I’ll go up and stay with Iris to keep an eye on her video call with Pete while you’re airing comments for your match against Kaiju Rainbow. How come there’s no camera person here to air your comments?

Bea:  I‘m airing my comments using my laptop computer. I’m connected to the Network and they’ll broadcast my comments real-time.

Bill:  Oh. . .Okay. . .I’ll have to start doing that also.

Bill goes upstairs and Bea gets on her laptop to air her comments for her upcoming match.

NO PITY. . .NO MERCY

Bea:  Before I go into my comments for my upcoming match against Kaiju Rainbow I wish to comment on Bill being in the Blast From The Past Tournament. I’m honored to have Bill in the Blast From The Past Tournament and I’ll be in his corner as his Manager for all his matches. I’m not going to lie to you but I hope Masque and Bill end up facing Mikah and Mac Bane in the Tournament. I want to see Mikah fail and Mac get beat down by Bill since Mac is the ringleader in the attacks that took place against Bill, Vinnie, and myself recently.

Bea holds her hand up in a fist and shakes it at the camera. She then grabs a bag of Skittles candy and aggressively rips the bag open. Bea downs the entire bag of Skittles in a short period of time then she glares into the webcam on her computer.

Bea:  You know that the tagline for Skittles candy is TASTE THE RAINBOW but you just saw me destroy the rainbow by ripping open the bag of Skittles and devouring all of them quickly. That’s how I plan on doing you in our match Kaiju. Just as I did with this bag of Skittles I’ll grab you, rip you open, and spill your rainbow all over the ring. TASTE THE RAINBOW they say? I say DESTROY THE RAINBOW!

Bea bursts out in laughter.

Bea:  I’ll be honest with you Kaiju. You managed to last longer in your match against Masque than I thought you would. When she locked in her Rapture Mandible Claw there was no escape for you. I’m sure you won’t mind if I also make you submit in our match right? I would expect you to talk a lot of crap leading up to our match but I’m not sure you’re able to talk very well after that Mandible Claw. Ha ha  ha!!!

DOES CATASTROPHE CREATE NEW THINGS

Bea:  Astronomers claim that planets were created when numerous celestial bodies crashed into each other. I call bullshit on that!. Things that crash into each other don’t create more complex and complete things. On the contrary two or more things crashing into each other usually destroys most of the objects that are crashing together. Have you ever seen an explosion in a junk yard and suddenly out of the results of the explosion a Boeing 747 Airliner, or a high rise building, or a car or truck, is created from the explosion? Hell no! Of course not! Well, Kaiju, I’m the explosion and you’re the trash in the dump. When I destroy you the pieces will not miraculously come together and create a new and better version of you. All it will do is splatter you around the ring. You’re going down for the count against me and there’s nothing you  can do about it.

PICK UP THE PIECES

Bea:  Kaiju are you familiar with the classic song titled PICK UP THE PIECES? It was done by the group Average White Band and it was very popular for the time when it came out. The lyrics are simple and go PICK UP THE PIECES repeated over and over again. Yeah, Kaiju, I’m going to break you into pieces and the crew at the Cox Pavilion in Las Vegas will come out and pick up your pieces.

FOLLOW THE COLORS

Bea:  Colors. Yeah! There are many colors out there. Some of the other wrestlers are green with envy over me. They always present the fact that I haven’t won as many matches as they have but then they’re green with envy because I’m prettier and more sexy than they could ever hope to be. Others are yellow because they have a yellow coward streak running down their spine. When the match action gets tough they often turn and run away. Others are blue because they always seem to be sad about something instead of enjoying every day to the fullest. Well, Kaiju, speaking of colors it is appropriate your name is Rainbow. Why? Because you’re green with envy that you can’t be like me. You’re jealous that you can never be as pretty and sexy as I am. You’re blue because you lost your match against Masque and you know you’re going to lose to me at Climax Control 321. But, Kaiju, after I put a big time beating on you know that you’ll also be black and blue from all the bruises I gave you. Enjoy the rainbow, Rainbow, because the storm named Bea is headed your way like a Category 5 hurricane and your rainbow is going to be obliterated.

OBSERVE, TAKE THE ADVANTAGE

Bea:  Well, Kaiju, how are you feeling so far hearing my comments concerning our match? Never mind telling me because I don’t care what you think or how you feel. I want you to know Bill has the video of your match against Masque and we’re going to go over the match. Bill has been in wrestling for 20 years and with his experience he’ll point things out to me so I can counter everything you have and to exploit your weaknesses. I’m honest concerning my work in the wrestling world that I didn’t come from a wrestling family as a lot of wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling have. I haven’t been a wrestler for 20 years as my husband Bill has done. I officially started my wrestling career on January 20, 2020, in Sin City Wrestling. With Bill’s experience and training I get better every match. And for damn sure I’m going to get the better of you in our match. Hurricane Bea is about to hit and  you’re directly in my path of destruction.

Bea smiles and waves and then she cuts the feed to the Network that is broadcasting her comments and our screen goes dark.


172
Supercard Archives / Re: Roulette Championship: Bulldog Bill Barnhart (c) v Alexander Raven
« on: January 18, 2022, 12:30:44 PM »
* Pete the Cactus used by permission of Senor Vinnie *

I’M THE ROULETTE CHAMPION AND ALEXANDER RAVEN CANNOT CHANGE THAT

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart stated he plans on being Roulette Champion for a long time. Bill told me his upcoming match against Alexander Raven is of no concern to him since he knows he’ll easily defeat Raven to retain the Roulette Championship.

IRIS AND PETE THE CACTUS

The scene changes and we see Bill in the bedroom Iris uses in their home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. Iris is on a laptop computer so Bill walks over to see what Iris is doing. He is surprised to see that Iris is having a video call with Pete the Cactus who belongs to Senor Vinnie.

Bill:  Iris what are you doing? I thought you and Pete the Cactus broke off your relationship last year. That’s why I’ve been trying to get you a date with UGA the English Bulldog mascot for the University of Georgia in Athens, Georgia. I guess Mommy Bea was right in her assumptions about you and Pete dating again.

Iris turns and looks at Daddy Bill. Iris lets out a snort indicating she isn’t interested in UGA the English Bulldog as she’s interested in continuing to date Pete the Cactus. Iris returns to her video call with Pete the Cactus. (For the benefit of the viewers an interpretation of what Pete and Iris are saying is being provided but we cannot fully verify the accuracy of the translation)

Pete the Cactus:  ! ! ! (interpretation:  I still love you Iris)

Iris:  Woof! (interpretation:  I still love you Pete)

Pete the Cactus:  ! ! ! (interpretation:  Okay then I will book a reservation for a restaurant in Reno, Nevada, so we can have a being reunited celebration meal)

Iris:  Bark! Bark! (interpretation:  Great! I love to eat!)

Pete the Cactus:  ! ! ! (interpretation:  Good! I love my girl to be chubby!)

Iris:  Woof! Bark! Howl! (interpretation:  Game on!)

Iris looks at Daddy Bill and realizes he is still listening in on her video call with Pete the Cactus. She snorts at Daddy Bill then hits the button to turn off the video call. Iris closes the laptop and struts out of the bedroom.

Bill:  Good to see Iris and Pete got back together. I hope they have a great time reunited. Not sure what they talked about but I’m sure it isn’t a serious case of love.

FUNDRAISING FOR A GREAT CAUSE

The scene changes and we get a shot of the Hospital-Medical Facility of Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta. We then get a shot of Bill Barnhart, Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, in the Conference Room inside the hospital. As the camera stops on Bill and Bea they make comments.

Bea:  Thanks for joining us today. We’re still in the Atlanta Metro Area and we’ll travel to Reno, Nevada, for Inception V after our comments today. As many of you know we love to have Bill and Iris compete in fundraising events to raise money for great causes. Today we are going to have a Pepperoni Pizza Eating contest between Bill and Iris to raise money for Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta, as they do fantastic work helping children recover from their illnesses.

Bill:  I’m not going to tell you that I win most of the competitions between myself and Iris as that would be a lie as we’re tied in the amount of wins against each other. Today we’re having a Pepperoni Pizza Eating contest. There’ll be a specific amount of time for me and Iris to devour pizza and the one who eats the most pizza in that amount of time is the winner and has the bragging rights. Iris always accuses me of cheating her in these fundraising events but I can’t expect her to be able to do logical reasoning. You know, like my upcoming opponent Alexander Raven, who isn’t capable of logical reasoning knowing that I’m gonna kick his ass at Inception V and walk away with my Roulette Championship still around my waist. But enough of Raven and his pathetic wrestling. We need to get on with the Pepperoni Pizza Eating contest.

Bea:  I’ll explain the rules of this Pepperoni Pizza Eating contest and how the money is raised for the fundraiser. Most of the donations come from patients and staff at Children’s Hospital of Atlanta. Since our friend, Anthony Amey, is the Sports Anchor at WSB-TV Channel 2 in Atlanta he arranged for a major monetary contribution from WST-TV for this fundraising event. The pizza eating portion of the event will be ten minutes. Yes only ten minutes for Bill and Iris to eat as much pizza as they can. We have Pizza Hut bringing the pizzas and they have been told to ensure all the pizzas brought to the Pepperoni Pizza Eating contest are the exact same size and weight so Iris won’t think her Daddy Bill is trying cheating her. The servers will place a pan of pepperoni pizza in front of Bill and one in front of Iris. When the ten minutes are up the person, or dog, who has eaten the most pepperoni pizza in that amount of time will be declared the winner. Since Bill and Iris are tied the winner breaks the tie. Bill. . .Iris. . .are you two ready?

Bill:  I’m always ready to eat pepperoni pizza!

Iris:  Woof!

Bea:  The servers come out with two pans of pepperoni pizza. These pizzas have been certified to be exactly the same size and weight. Each pizza is cut into eight slices. Should either Bill or Iris finish their pan of pepperoni pizza before the ten minutes elapses the servers will immediately place another pan of pepperoni pizza in front of the person, or dog, and they’ll continue to eat until the time limit is up. The pepperoni pizzas are on the table in front of Bill and Iris. Ready. . .GO!!!

Bea starts the timer as we watch Bill and Iris dive into their pepperoni pizzas. It looks like Iris has taken the lead. Bill also notices this so he picks up the pace and quickly passes Iris up. Not happy to be falling behind Iris also picks up the pace. The two are going bite for bite and this contest appears to be even. Both finish their pans of pepperoni pizza and the servers immediately place another pan of pepperoni pizza in front of Bill and one in front of Iris. The two continue devouring their pizzas and they still appear to be even.

Bea looks at the timer as notices there are only five seconds left in the Pepperoni Pizza Eating Contest.

Bea:  Five seconds left you two! FIVE. . .FOUR. . .THREE. . .TWO. . .ONE. TIME’S UP!!! STOP EATING!!!

Bill and Iris obey Bea’s command and stop eating. The servers collect the remaining pizza. They analyze how much of the pizzas have been devoured and how much is left. They then weigh them on a scale. To their surprise the amount of pizza remaining is the same for Bill and Iris so this contest is a tie.

Bea:  We have an interesting situation in this Pepperoni Pizza Eating contest. Pizza Hut has determined Bill and Iris ended in a tie so both are winners. May I have the official tally of the amount of money we raised for Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta?

The Finance Manager of Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta hands Bea a sheet of paper. Bea looks at the paper and smiles.

Bea:  We have exceeded our expectations for this charity fundraising event. The Finance Manager of Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta handed me a sheet of paper stating we raised $10,000 for Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta. Thanks to everyone who contributed to this great cause! Also thanks to Bill and Iris for being willing to perform in these fundraising events.

Bill, Bea, and Iris, celebrate and Bill and Iris accept that the contest ended in a tie so they’ll have another opportunity in the future to break the tie.

TIME TO RETURN HOME TO LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

Bill, Bea, and Iris, are walking to their car in the parking lot of Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta to drive home to Lawrenceville, Georgia, where Bill and Bea and Iris can get their stuff ready to travel to Reno, Nevada, for Inception V. As they’re walking Bill realizes he stepped on, or in, something, and the item is stuck to the sole of his shoe.

Bill:  Hang on Bea. Something is stuck on the sole of my shoe.

Bea:  We need to take a look at it so we don’t track stuff into our car.

Bill takes a seat on a bench and removes his shoe and turns it over so he can examine the sole.

Bill:  Take a look at this Bea. It appears I stepped on a Cockroach and squished it and it stuck to the sole of my shoe.

Bill pulls out a tissue and scrapes the squished cockroach remains off the sole of his shoe and he tosses the tissue into the trash can.

Bill:  I believe I found out where Alexander Raven has been hiding. Unfortunately I squashed him under my shoe and had to scrape him off and toss him in the trash can. Glad I found his hiding place. Har har har!!!

Bea:  That’s a mean thing to say Bill.

Bill:  So? Alexander Raven isn’t worth my time and he isn’t worth me making kind comments about. He’s just a Cockroach in the dirt of life that needs to be deposed of.

Bill, Bea, and Iris continue to their car in the parking lot at Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta. They get in their car and drive off to return to their home in Lawrenceville, Georgia.

BACK AT HOME IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

We are taken inside the home of Bill and Bea in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The camera person is set up and ready to broadcast Bill’s comments leading up to his Roulette Championship defense match against Alexander Raven at Inception V. Bill walks over to his Karaoke machine and turns it on.

Bill:  One of my favorite musicals is OKLAHOMA. I want to play a part of one of the main songs from the musical where the star of the musical, Gordon MacRae, sings OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING. After you hear the original version I’ll present my version of the song.

Bill presses the  play button and the song OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNINIG from the musical OKLAHOMA plays.

There's a bright golden haze on the meadow,
There's a bright golden haze on the meadow,
The corn is as high as an elephant's eye,
And it looks like its climbing clear up to the sky.

Oh what a beautiful morning,
Oh what a beautiful day,
I've got a wonderful feeling,
Everything's going my way.

Bill presses the stop button.

Bill:  That’s all I need you to hear of the song OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MORNING from the musical OKLAHOMA. Now that you heard the original I’ll give you my version of the song.

Bill presses the play button but he also presses the button that allow the music only to play while suppressing the original lyrics so we can hear Bill singing the lyrics.

There's a bright golden haze on the meadow,
There's a bright golden haze on the meadow,
The corn is as high as an elephant's eye,
And it looks like its climbing clear up to the sky.

Oh what a beautiful morning,
Oh what a beautiful day,
I am the Roulette Champion
And I’m going to keep it that way
Yes I’m going to keep it that way.

Bill presses the stop button and smiles.

Bill:  I’ve mentioned this numerous times but I’ll mention it again. I plan on keeping possession of the Roulette Championship for a long time. Am I going to pass up the top three longest Roulette Championship reigns in Sin City Wrestling History? I don’t know the answer to that question but I’ll keep plugging along and see how it eventually turns out. For damn sure those who place their bets on me to retain the Roulette Championship against Alexander Raven will win those bets. Hmmm. A thought just came to me. Hey, Alexander, since you’re going to lose to me I suggest you place your money bets on me to win. That way even though you lose the match you still come out winning the bet and you walk away with more money than you came in with.

Bea:  I love it when you do parody of songs.

I PLAN ON BEING ROULETTE CHAMPION FOR A LONG TIME

Bill:  Here’s where I stand so far with the Roulette Championship. I won the Roulette Championship on October 3, 2021, at Climax Control 312. I successfully defended the Roulette Championship on November 7, 2021, at High Stakes XI. Some may say one successful championship defense isn’t anything to brag about. I say that first successful defense of the Roulette Championship was just the first in what will be a very long line of successful defenses. Will I manage to become the longest reigning Roulette Champion in Sin City Wrestling? Keep your eyes on me and we’ll find out.

Bill lets out a light laugh.

Bill:  Alexander Raven you’ve talked so much shit no wonder your breath stinks. You come into Sin City Wrestling and manage to take out two weak opponents to end up facing me for the Roulette Championship and you think you’re something to brag about. There’s a lot of things I find pathetic and disturbing but you’re near the top of the list of things I find disturbing and pathetic. Honestly I don't know which is more pathetic. Listening to you mumbling along trying to explain what you want to attempt to do in our match or to to watch Erik Estrada acting in a Spanish Telenovela and trying to speak Spanish. If you don’t get the Erik Estrada reference do some research so you’ll understand what I’m talking about.

Bill lets out a hearty laugh this time.

Bill:  You apparently make the assumption that I’m mentally slow and incompetent. You obviously don’t realize I carry a genius IQ of 130. That’s okay. Less than five percent of the people in the world are at my IQ level so I can’t blame someone with a low IQ to understand. Allow me to make comments concerning your mindless ramblings and false claims and then tell you and the viewers the truth. You brag about being the greatest wrestler around and yet against Matthew Knox you allowed yourself to get distracted and he won the match by throwing you into the sleigh. That sure didn’t appear to be great wrestling or great intelligence on your part. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you are trying to blame your mental lapse and loss in that match to me walking out from the backstage area to watch your match. I didn’t distract you Alex. You distracted yourself. Nice attempt to try to place the blame for your loss on me but that shit doesn’t work. You are 100 percent responsible for your loss to Matthew Knox. I’m the Roulette Champion for a reason. I earned it the Roulette Championship. I didn’t steal the win. . .I stepped up and earned it. When I see you in front of the camera rambling on with incoherent statements, comments, and threats, beating your chest with your fists, and foaming at the mouth, I see a loser and not a winner. I take wrestling seriously but apparently your talk is cheap because your actions, especially against Matthew Knox, prove you don’t take wrestling seriously. I’m walking into our match as Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion and leaving the match still Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion and there’s nothing you can do to change that.

Bill gets louder in his laughter.

Bill:  I have an allergic effect on other wrestlers. Often when people have allergic reactions to something they get chills, cold feet, a rash, a fever, and sometimes the inability to move away from the item causing them the allergic reaction. Well, Raven, I’m the allergen and you’re the victim affected by my allergen. Enjoy your chills, cold feet, a rash, and a fever, due to being in a match against me. Feel free to scratch away and take your allergy medication. Not that anything you can do will change the outcome of our match! Har har har!

Bea:  Nice one Bill.

Bill:  Simply telling the truth Bea. Alexander it appears you’ve lost a lot of things in your life and most of those things you’ll never get back so you have to rely on memories, some bad and some good, to fill the void. Now you face me for the Roulette Championship. What this means is you’ll have another loss added to your long list of losses in your lifetime because for damn sure I’m not losing to you.

Bill bursts out laughing again and it takes him a bit of time to recover from laughing to continue his comments to Alexander Raven.

Bill:  There’s many more references and analogies I could use to describe you to let people know how pathetic you are, how pathetic you’ll perform in our match, and how pathetic you’ll be when you run off and hide after your loss to me. You see, Alex, taking me on for the Roulette Championship is like a Miner digging for gold in a sewer. You’ll come up with tons of shit but you damn sure won’t come up with any gold. The Roulette Championship gold is mine!

Bill roars with laughter this time but he quickly regains his composure.

Bill:  Alex I’ve had many opponents make me shake my head in disgust due to their stupidity. Your pathetic Kindergarten level rants and threats are hilarious. I defeated Satan and I defeated my evil half-brother Chris Shipman. I know I’ve mentioned it numerous times but it bears repeating. Shipman spent 10 years trying to kill me. Yes you heard me correctly. He wanted me dead because he was found guilty of the death of our sister. If Satan couldn’t take me out, and if my half-brother Chris Shipman couldn’t take me out, and both of them were on the Master level of violence, then why the hell do you think you can take me out when you haven’t graduated from Kindergarten level threats yet?

Bill bursts out in uncontrollable laughter and it takes him some time to regain his composure.

Bill:  Take a look at me Raven. Take a close look at me. Take a damn close look!!! While you’re classified as fake goods I’m 100 percent real. I don’t need chemicals, preservatives, or other additives, to make me great. I’m the real deal. I’m what you want to be, but will never be, so you try to enhance your acceptance by deceit. Try whatever the hell you want Alexander. Think whatever the hell you want Alex. While you try and think of what you might be I’m damn sure positively know what I am. Enjoy yourself leading up to our match at Inception V because when you step into the ring against me and I destroy you there’ll be no enjoyment remaining in your life. Bea we need to get our things together to travel to Reno, Nevada, for Inception V. We’ll leave for Reno, Nevada, shortly and I’ll provide more comments after we get settled into our hotel room.

The camera person cuts his camera feed and the screen goes dark.

AFTER THEIR ARRIVAL IN RENO NEVADA, BILL, BEA, AND IRIS GO OUT FOR DINNER

The camera person turns on his camera feed and we see Bill and Bea and Iris at the Campo Italian Restaurant in Reno, Nevada. Bill and Bea, along with Iris, are sitting in the outside dining area as dogs are not allowed inside the restaurant. As the camera pans around the outside dining area we see Pete the Cactus arrive in the outside dining area. Bill and Bea knew Pete was showing up as they were informed that Pete and Iris wanted to have a dinner date to celebrate their reconnection with each other. Bill and Bea set up a small table next to their table and Pete and Iris take their seats.

Bea:  Aren’t they a cute couple?

Bill:  I guess so. But this time I hope they remain together and don’t break up again.

Bill and Bea place their food order and they order a plate of spaghetti and meatballs for Pete and Iris. After a short time the server arrives with the food. They set the plate of spaghetti and meatballs in the middle of the small table for Pete and Iris. After the server leaves Bill, Bea, Iris, and Pete, enjoy their meal.

Pete and Iris start eating the spaghetti and we can tell they are enjoying their meal. They’re both acting a bit shy and they don’t realize that the strand of spaghetti they are both eating is intact and between the two of them. Both keep chewing and ingesting the spaghetti until their faces are very close to each other. Suddenly the two meet lips and kiss and both act cute like they didn’t mean for the kiss to take place. Pete and Iris blush and then get back to eating.

Bea:  Oh, Bill, isn’t that adorable? Pete and Iris just had the same meal experience Lady and the Tramp did in the movie where they ended up eating spaghetti and kissing!

Bill:  I’m sure it wasn’t an accident. I’m sure they planned it. Anyway at least the two are getting along this time. I really hope this relationship lasts.

The time passes and the four are done with their meals. When Bill looks over at Pete and Iris he notices they are no longer sitting across from each other at the table as Pete has moved to sit next to Iris and his arm is around her so he can hold her close. Iris doesn’t seem to mind his cactus spines. Bill and Bea inform Iris and Pete that since their dinner is done they’ll take a walk around the area for a bit before returning to their hotel.

AFTER THEIR WALK

The scene switches to the hallway in front of the hotel room where Bill, Bea, and Iris are staying in Reno. Pete and Iris are saying their good-byes and good nights and then Senor Vinnie walks down the hallway and stands next to Pete. Everyone exchanges comments and Bill, Bea, and Iris, return inside their hotel room while Senor Vinnie and Pete the Cactus walk down the hallway to their hotel room. Once Bill and Bea are inside their room they provide closing comments.

Bill:  The Chinese calendar for 2022 says this is the Year of the Tiger. I’m here to tell you I’m classifying the year 2022 at The Year of the Bulldog. This is my time. This is my year. This is my Roulette Championship.

Bea:  It is going to be a thrill for me to watch Bill successfully defend the Roulette Championship against Alexander Raven and to serve in your corner as your Manager.

Bill:  Thanks Bea. I’m going to walk confidently into the Reno Events Center as Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion. After I defeat Alexander Raven I’ll confidently walk back to the backstage area with my head held high as I’ll still be Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion. There are no powers in the Universe that can make me lose the Roulette Championship to a clown opponent like Alexander Raven. Tune in on Sunday, January 23, 2022, and watch me work my magic!

Bill informs the camera person he is done with his comments for today. The camera person cuts his camera feed and our screen goes dark.



173
Supercard Archives / Re: Dani Weston v Seleana Zdunich v Bea Barnhart
« on: January 18, 2022, 12:10:08 PM »
I WILL WALK AWAY THE WINNER TO GO ON TO FACE THE INTERNET CHAMPION AT BLAZE OF GLORY X

Narrator:  I spoke with Bea Barnhart before giving you my lead-in comments for her presentation and I assure you Bea is fired up and plans on winning her Internet Championship qualifier match against Danielle Weston and Seleana Zdunich.

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE

The scene changes and we see Bea Barnhart relaxing in Sweetwater Park which is located near her home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. Bill and Iris are not sitting with her at the picnic table so we assume Bill and Iris either stayed home or they’re walking around the park while Bea presents her comments for her upcoming match.

Bea:  Before I address my two opponents, Danielle and Seleana, I wish to make general comments based on some bullshit others have said about me. Many of you make comments about your concern that I attend the matches of Bill Barnhart and Senor Vinnie. You seem to have an issue that, in addition to being an active wrestler in Sin City Wrestling, I’m also their legally licensed Manager and I have the right to be at ringside for matches involving Bill or Vinnie or both. You also need to remember I was serving as their Manager before I decided to become an active wrestler on the Roster. Some of you commented that I shouldn’t be allowed at ringside even though I’m legally their Manager. At the same time that you lame assholes demand that I not be allowed to serve as Manager for Vinnie and Bill and be in their corner during their matches, you have your thugs coming to the ring to interfere in matches of Bill, Vinnie, and other wrestlers. What part of YOU ARE F*CKING HYPOCRITES! are you not understanding? Sheesh! The crap you have to put up with from incompetent, moronic, idiotic, and pathetic, and jealous wrestlers in the sport.

Bea motions with her hand as if she is tossing those ignorant people, who disrespect her as a legal Manager in Sin City Wrestling, over her shoulder to land in a trash heap.

UNCALLED FOR NEGATIVE COMMENTS

Bea:  I have to let you know I was surprised by the comments from Seleana. This is a person who has defeated me five times in five matches. Anyone else would have jumped in front of the camera and hurled insults and demeaning comments in my direction. When Seleana made positive comments, encouraging comments, and letting me know that I can achieve my top potential in wrestling, I was surprised and it gave me more respect for Seleana than I had before. That doesn’t mean I’m going to back down and lose a sixth time to her. It means I need to bear down, stand up, go full speed ahead, and perform at my best in my upcoming match.

Bea gives a thumbs up into the camera.

HELLO?

Bea:  Now that the nice comments for one of my opponents is out of the way I now come to Danielle. Danielle? Danielle? DANIELLE??? HELLO??? I guess the statement that SILENCE IS GOLDEN might be in play here and the song SILENCE IS GOLDEN comes to mine. The lyrics go Silence is golden. . .But my eyes still see. . . Why the silence? Why don’t you have anything to say? Only you know the answer to that question.

Bea looks deep into the camera.

NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE

Bea:  Hi losers! Yes I’m addressing my two opponents Danielle and Seleana but I don’t mean my comments to be disrespected or insulting. My comments are from confidence and not from being a jerk who wants to insult my opponents. Why do I consider you two losers? Because you’re going to lose to me in our Triple Threat match at Inception V. I’ve already heard the rumors, and assaults on my character, from many wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling. The majority of comments consists of them stating they don’t believe I have a snowball’s chance in hell of defeating you two and moving on to Blaze of Glory X to challenge for the Bombshell Internet Championship. I know you all believe by what I’m planning on accomplishing in our match is impossible. Therefore let me present to you a quote from a brilliant and admired man, Nelson Mandela, to put everything in perspective. Nelson Mandela is quoted as saying IT ALWAYS SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE UNTIL IT’S DONE. There you have it! Short, simple, direct, and to the point. That quote from Nelson Mandela applies to me and those who doubt me. To you it seems impossible that I’m going to defeat Danielle and Seleana but when it’s done you’ll realize it is possible and I did, in fact, win the match.

HUNTING COMPARISON

Bea:  I wish to make a comment using hunting as a comparison. Sorry if I offend anyone who enjoys hunting Deer, Elk, and other animals, but I personally don’t feel there’s any skill, sport, or challenge, involved in shooting unarmed animals with a rifle from a long distance away. So what’s the comparison between a coward hiding behind a rifle shooting innocent animals and me facing you two in this Internet Championship Qualifier Triple Threat match? I feel that me walking into our match and easily defeating you two is like a hunter shooting innocent animals. Why? Because I feel you two are like the animals being hunted in that you don’t realize the danger you’re in. You don’t realize you’re going down until you actually go down. I haven’t decided how I’ll end our match when I defeat you two but the end result remains the same in that I defeat you and earn a shot at the Internet Champion at Blaze of Glory X. While I look down on you two on the mat knowing I’m going on to face the Internet Champion you two will be looking up at the overhead lights unable to move due to the beating I put on you.

Bea gives a huge Joker-like grin into the camera.

THE FINAL RESULT

Bea:  As I previously stated I admire and appreciate Seleana even though she has defeated me five times in five matches. I didn’t go into those matches and perform poorly as everyone who watched those matches knows. I went into the match and gave it everything and Seleana got the win. That doesn’t disappoint me or make me sad. What it does is make me more determined to win this match and go on to challenge for the Bombshell Internet Championship. I’m not backing down against my opponents due to previous results of matches. I’m not entering this match over-confident as that usually results in a loss. We’ll see at Inception V what the results of my match will be. Thanks for tuning in and listening to my comments. See you all at Inception V.

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments for today. The camera person calls into the Network and they return to regularly scheduled programming for this time slot.


174
Supercard Archives / Re: Roulette Championship: Bulldog Bill Barnhart (c) v Alexander Raven
« on: January 11, 2022, 08:46:40 AM »
* Pete the Cactus used by permission of Senor Vinnie *

ALEXANDER RAVEN IS TAKING A SWAN DIVE

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart is fired up to be defending his Roulette Championship for the second time. The first successful defense was against Agostino Romano. This second Roulette Championship defense is against Alexander Raven at Inception V on January 23, 2022.

AN INCIDENT FROM NOVEMBER 2014

We are taken back to November 2014, when Bill and Bea were at the one year point in their home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. Bea’s friend had computerized locks, and a security system, installed in their home from Vivent Home Security company. Bea is trying to convince Bill of the benefits of having a keyless door lock put on the exterior doors of the home, and a home alarm system, like her friend did in their home.

Bea:  My friend loves their keyless door locks they had installed in their home. They can drive up in their driveway, get on their cell phone, and unlock the front door without having to use a key. They can also leave the house and use their cell phone from their car to lock the locks. On top of that they have a home alarm system to protect their home.

Bill:  Why would I need something like that? Technology is great but what if your cell phone doesn’t connect to the security system and you can’t lock or unlock your doors or disarm the alarm system? That’s why I prefer using a key so I’m directly connected to my door locks instead of relying on tech stuff that often fails.

Bea:  The sales rep from Vivent Home Security will be calling in a few minutes. Just talk with him and then you can make a decision from there.

Bill:  Why didn’t you tell me you asked the sales rep to call and talk to me? You know I hate surprises and being blindsided like that.

The phone rings and Bea answers it. The call is from the sales rep from Vivent Home Security. Bea hands the phone to Bill who reluctantly takes the call. He places the phone on speaker so both can hear what the sales rep is saying.

Vivent Home Security Sales Rep:  Bill I’m glad your wife asked me to call you. Your friends had us install a security system and keyless locks in their home and they love it. I want to come over and show you our products.

Bill:  No! You’re not coming over here to show me anything! I don’t want your keyless locks or security system in my home!

Vivent Home Security Sales Rep:  Just think of the convenience of driving into your driveway and getting on your cell phone and unlocking your front door using your phone. You don’t even have to get out of your car. Isn’t that great? And on top of that you have a home security system that protects your home and you can also arm and disarm the security system from your cell phone.

Bill:  What part of NO are you not understanding? I’m fine using a key to get into my home. I don’t want the keyless lock to malfunction, or our cell phones cannot link up to the servers your company uses to access the locks the security system, then what? I can’t get into my home due to tech issues?

Vivent Home Security Sales Rep:  Oh, Bill, come on now! You still have a key so you can open the door lock with the key if the keyless system fails to work. No problem.

Bill:  So you just admitted that sometimes the system malfunctions and then you customer has to return to using a physical key to get into their home. That’s a problem for me so the answer, again, is NO!!!

Vivent Home Security Sales Rep:  Okay let’s forget about the keyless lock thing and you can just go with the home security system.

Bill:  What the f*ck!!! Are you not listening to me? I don’t want a home security system! I have friends and neighbors who have home security systems and their systems often malfunction and sound alarms disturbing the other neighbors! Also if the Police get notifications often due to a false alarm they charge you for showing up to investigate. So, again, my final answer is NO!!! NO!!! HELL F*CKING NO!!!

Bea:  But…Bill…

Bill:  I said I don’t want a home security system or a keyless door lock! That’s my final answer!

Vivent Home Security Sales Rep:  Bill you’re making a huge mistake. If you don’t purchase a home security system from my company someone is going to break into your home and then you’ll be sorry!

Bill:  What the f*ck??? Did you just threaten to send someone to my house and break into my house as revenge on me for refusing to purchase your home security and keyless door lock systems? Nobody threatens me! I’m calling your parent company in Provo, Utah, and filing a complaint against you for communicating a threat! I’ll also report you to Gwinnett County Police and inform my Attorney what you did by threatening me! Nobody threatens me and gets away with it. . .NOBODY!!!

Bill ends the call and hands the cell phone back to Bea. He gives Bea a glaring stern look and reminds her to never blindside him like that again.

*BACK TO CURRENT TIME*

AT THE HOME OF BILL AND BEA BARNHART IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

The scene switches and we are taken to the home of Bill and Bea Barnhart in Lawrenceville, Georgia. Bill, Bea, and their English Bulldog Iris, are in their living room. The camera person is set up and ready to broadcast Bill’s comments leading up to his Roulette Championship defense match at Inception V on Sunday, January 23, 2022. The camera person informs Bill and Bea they are live broadcasting.

Bea:  Bill before you go into comments concerning your Roulette Championship match at Inception V can I mention something about Iris?

Bill:  Okay but please don’t take up too much of our air time since I need to get comments out so everyone, including Alexander Raven, knows what’s going on concerning our match. What’s up with Iris?

Bea:  You remember Iris and Senor Vinnie’s friend Pete the Cactus dated for a time then they had a falling out. Ever since they broke up it appears Iris is still interested in Pete. That might explain why Iris refused to meet Uga the English Bulldog who is the Mascot for the University of Georgia in Athens, Georgia.

Bill:  Sometimes you read into situations way more than is really there. Can you give me examples why you think Iris still has feelings for Pete the Cactus?

Bea:  When I go shopping at Home Depot or Wal-Mart and go into the garden section Iris tends to focus on the cactus plants. I often have to convince her to leave the garden department which sometimes requires me dragging her away from the cactus plants. Also there are times I don’t see Iris running around the house then when I go into her bedroom I notice she’s on her bed focused on her laptop computer screen. When I try to get in a position to see what she’s doing on the computer she either closes the browser she’s in, or closes the laptop, or shuts the laptop off. That’s unusual behavior even for Iris.

Bill:  I’ll look into it Bea. I’ll talk with Senor Vinnie to see if he’s noticed any similar behavior from Pete. Thanks for the update on Iris but we need to get into my comments for my match at Inception V.

NEVER HESITATE. . .ALWAYS KNOW WHAT YOU WILL DO NEXT

Bill:  Everyone saw my match at High Stakes XI where I defended the Roulette Championship against Agostino Romano. The kid gave me a good match but Agostino is not at my level of competition and he committed a major mistake in the sport of wrestling. When he had me reeling he made the mistake to stop and hesitate, probably trying to figure out what he was going to do next, and when he hesitated I struck him quickly like a Cobra and locked him up in my Barnhart Shoulder Breaker Flying Hammer Lock for the submission. Never, NEVER, NEVER do you hesitate when you’re inflicting damage on your opponent!

Bea:  You said it Bill. However even if Agostino hadn’t hesitated you would have still easily defeated him.

Bill:  With that said I now want to ask Alexander Raven a question. What did you do in your match against Matthew Knox at Climax Control 320? You had him reeling and actually had a remote chance to take him out. Then I came walking out of the backstage area so I could watch your match and you hesitated because I was in the arena. Yes, Alexander, you hesitated and stared at me and Matthew Knox took advantage of your distraction and got the win over you by throwing your hesitating ass into the sled. Is that really how pathetic you are as the Number One Contender to my Roulette Championship? DAMN!!!

WINNING OVER WEAK OPPONENTS

Bill:  Alexander Raven. The name that’ll go down in the history books as a pathetic challenger for my Roulette Championship. Let’s go over your match where you defeated Lincoln Daniels and Brayden Hilton to have the unfortunate honor of facing me for the Roulette Championship. Let’s also remind everyone it was supposed to be a Fatal Four Way but one of the participants in your match got beat down before the match and was unable to participate so your Fatal Four Way became a Triple Threat. Defeating Lincoln Daniels and Brayden Hilton only means you defeated two wrestlers who, combined in talent, equals less than half your talent and ability in the ring. You may wish to brag about those statistics but that’s a fail for you in my eyes. You see, Alex, although you defeated two wrestlers, who combined were less than half your wrestling talent, you need to remember you’re less than half the wrestler I am. I’d wish you the best of luck in your attempt to earn the Roulette Championship from me but all the good luck in the world isn’t enough to get you the win over me. Your recent match against Matthew “The Raven” Knox at Climax Control 320 wasn’t a great performance for you either. So now you have to face me to challenge for my Roulette Championship. Too bad you had to wait two months to get into the ring with me but when I get done beating you down you’ll wish you could have waited longer to have this match to challenge me as I’m not just going to defeat you I’m gonna hurt you.

SWAN DIVE

Bill:  Alexander you need to understand that I know and understand more than everyone else combined because I have a Genius I.Q. of 130. One thing I understand is that you’re coming into this match with a lot of hope but you’re leaving the match with nothing but a loss. There’s a slang term called SWAN DIVE. Simply put when you state someone is doing a SWAN DIVE means to “decrease suddenly and decisively. . .to plummet to the ground in a crash landing.” Yes, Raven, you’re coming into our match hoping to obtain the golden ring but what you’ll end up obtaining is a face plant into the mat and watching my hand raised in victory. . .well that’s only if you’ve regained consciousness before they announce my win over you.

UNEXPECTED CALL

The home phone of Bill and Bea rings. Bill sighs and offers an apology to the viewers for the interruption.

Bill:  Excuse me while I answer this call. I’m sure it’s a scammer and I’ll put the call on speaker so you can hear both sides of the conversation as I don’t want anyone assuming anything.

Bill places the phone on speaker.

Bill:  Hello. Who are you and why are you calling?

Caller:  I’m John from Microsoft Tech Support. We noticed that you have a virus on your computer and you need to pay us $500 to have the virus removed. If you don’t pay us the. . .

Bill cuts the caller off mid-sentence.

Bill:  You’re not from Microsoft Tech Support. You’re sitting in some call center, probably in another country, and you’re a scammer. I’m going to report you to the Federal Communications Commission Do Not Call complaint website and also submit a report to the FBI Fraud Division as it is a Felony for you to claim you are a reputable business when you’re not.

Caller:  No you’re wrong! I’m really from Microsoft Tech Support and your computer has a virus and if you don’t pay us $500 to remove it your computer will stop working.

Bill:  If you want to pretend you’re from Microsoft Tech Support, and if you believe you know that my computer has a virus, answer three questions correctly and you can have your $500 demand for payment. If you cannot answer the questions then f*ck off. Deal?

Caller:  Go ahead.

Bill:  What brand of computer do I have? What operating system name and version am I using? Final question where is my computer located?

Caller:  You have an Asus laptop computer. You are running Windows 11. Your computer is located in the State of California.

Bill:  Wrong. . .Wrong. . .Wrong. . .three strikes and you’re out!!!

Bill ends the call and blocks the caller’s number.

Bill:  In a one month period I get twenty to thirty scam phone calls. Yes you heard me correctly. I get nearly one scam phone call per day. Some are people trying to sell me something when I didn’t contact them first to ask for information on their products. Others try to claim they’re from Microsoft Support and they make the claim that my computer notified them there is a virus on my computer and if I pay them hundreds of dollars they’ll remove the virus for me. Of course they are full of shit scammers. Others are scammers who claim they are from Government agencies such as Social Security or the Internal Revenue Service, and some call then stay silent and you have no clue what in the hell they’re calling about.

Bea:  The other scam call that is amusing is the one where they call you and tell you your auto warranty on your car has expired and if you don’t renew it with them you’ll not have repairs covered. Each time I get a call like this the first thing they ask is for us to give them the make and model and year of the vehicle they claim has an expired warranty. We tell them if they claim they know we have a vehicle with an expired warranty then they should be able to tell us the make and model and year of the vehicle they are calling about. They always respond that they are prohibited by their company from telling us that information and that the only way they can know for sure you’re the owner of the vehicle they are calling about is to give them the make and model of the vehicle. At that point we tell the scammers since they can’t tell us the make and model and year of the vehicle they claim we own that the warranty has expired they can f*ck off and then they hang up.

Bill:  Here in the United States there are laws pertaining to unsolicited and scammer callers. The laws state that the phone number they are calling from must be a valid phone number and that the number shows up on the Caller ID. Additionally the Caller ID has to be valid with the name of the caller or the business they work for. If the call is a recording they have to give you an option to speak to a human so you can tell them to *BLEEP* off and remove your phone number from their computer system. If they violate the laws then each violation comes with a $1,000 fine from the Government. An example includes if their phone number is fake then it is one violation. If the name on the Caller ID is not valid that is a second violation. If it is a recorded call that does not allow you to speak to a human to tell them to *BLEEP* off that is a third violation. That means in the example I just gave the Federal Communications Commission can fine them $3,000 on that one call.

Bea:  I finally asked Bill not to answer these calls any longer as they’re just a waste of our time. I told him if the incoming call is valid then when it gets transferred to voicemail they’ll leave a valid voicemail and phone number so we can call them back.

Bill:  I stopped answering calls unless I know, beyond a doubt, the person calling is someone I know. If the phone number and Caller ID does not properly identify the caller I let it go to voicemail. I’ve had at least a dozen calls where the Caller ID of the caller is my name and our home phone number. That’s proof they’re illegally using names and phone numbers of real people to try to scam others. When their incoming calls are valid the caller, when transferred to our voicemail, will leave a message and I’ll return their call. If they don’t leave a message it means they’re a scammer. If they’re a scammer and they’re stupid enough to leave a message I report them to the FCC Do Not Call Registry Complaint website and to the FBI Fraud Division. I only answered the incoming call a short time ago so I could have you listen to the call to show you what we’re dealing with. Since I’m the Analogy King I use the concept of scammer callers to indicate how most wrestlers I face are scammers. Most, like Alexander Raven as an example, try to sell the fans, and other wrestlers, that they’re something they’re not. They’re bullshitters just like the scammers who call you on the phone who try to make you think they’re something they’re not. Bottom line is that those wrestlers who try scamming other wrestlers, and the fans, are all exposed in the end. Gee, Alex, are you enjoying the fact that I’m exposing you as the fraud wrestler you are?

RECENT VISIT WITH DOCTOR KIM

Bill:  Recently I visited our family Physician, Doctor Kim, at AG Family Medicine, in Duluth, Georgia. Doctor Kim has given me a 100 percent healthy rating to get back into the wrestling ring as I’ve fully recovered from the cowardly attack made by Mac Bane and his thugs recently. Doctor Kim knows I have an inner demon that, when I was feuding with my half-brother Chris Shipman, I often let the inner demon take over. Often the damage I inflicted upon my half-brother was controlled by the inner demon to the point where I couldn’t contain it. And there were times even when I was able to get some control over that inner demon the damage inflicted on my half-brother was beyond even what I was able to understand.

Bea:  Doctor Kim gave Bill tools to reduce his anger toward other wrestlers who attack and threaten him causing him to seek revenge. Doctor Kim told Bill that instead of prescribing medications to help him control his anger he taught Bill meditation techniques. He said keeping control of your emotions, especially during wrestling matches, is important. He told Bill if the inner demon regains control and comes out and gets violent and opponents get seriously hurt it could jeopardize his wrestling career. Bill has done a great job keeping the inner demon under control since his feud with his half-brother Chris Shipman.

Bill:  Everyone saw the cowardly attack upon me. Mac Bane hired thugs to gang up on me and brutally attack me after the match was over. They tried to justify their actions but their words fell meaningless to the floor. Although I keep my inner demon under control if there are additional violent attacks upon me, or Bea, or Senor Vinnie, or Iris, I refuse to be held responsible for the damage my inner demon causes on our attackers when I let the inner demon loose on them.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bill:  Well, Alexander, we had a lot of things discussed today. Seems you got yourself into a horrible situation winning the Roulette Championship Qualifier match recently. Now you have to face me and you’re gonna lose big time. My win over you is so sure that even a blind man can see my win over you.

Bea:  It’s going to be nice for me to serve as Manager in your corner so I can enjoy watching you make short work of Alexander Raven.

Bill: Raven you remind me of the sales rep from Vivent Home Security who tried to sell me some bullshit home security system and keyless locks. He tried to sell me crap I didn’t want and didn’t need. Just like you try to sell your crap about how great a wrestler you think you are but we all know differently. Just as I kicked that Sales Rep out of my life I’ll kick you out also.

Bill lets out a laugh.

Bill:  Ha ha ha! Alexander you remind me of the scammer callers who claim to know everything but they don’t know shit. You heard the phone call that came in from some fool claiming he was from Microsoft Support. I made short work of him and I’ll make short work of you.

Bill lets out another laugh but this one is a bit louder.

Bill:  HA HA HA!!! You come into this match having defeated Lincoln Daniels and Brayden Hilton. Now you must face me in your pathetic attempt to de-throne me at Roulette Champion. Your role in our match is to amuse the crowd by trying to defeat me. I say TRYING because you’ll try but you’ll fail to earn the Roulette Championship from me. When you do the calculations it all comes out with the same result that I win and retain the Roulette Championship and you go home the loser. As I previously mentioned if you combine the wrestling talents of Lincoln Daniels and Brayden Hilton their combined talent is about half of yours. So for you to have defeated them means you didn’t have a legitimate challenge from them. Now, Alex, you’re the wrestler who is less than half the wrestler I am so what does that tell you? It tells you that you haven’t got a snowball’s chance in Hell of defeating me. I plan on holding onto the Roulette Championship for a long time.

Bill informs the camera person that after his next comments they can cut their camera feed as he’ll be done with his comments for today.

Bill:  Raven do you know what an OH SHIT moment is? It’s when you want something so desperately and then when you get it what you get is something way more than you expected and you go OH SHIT and wonder what the hell you got yourself into. Yeah that’s what I’m talking about. You wanted a match against me for my Roulette Championship and now that you see it in writing you’re going OH SHIT! All the good luck charms in the world, all the magic spells in the world, all the bought and paid for interference in the world, can’t get you a win over me. You have been schooled in Bill Barnhart’s School of Hard Knocks!

Bill motions to the camera person to indicate he’s done with his comments for today and the camera person cuts their camera feed and the Network returns to regular programming for this time slot.


175
Supercard Archives / Re: Dani Weston v Seleana Zdunich v Bea Barnhart
« on: January 11, 2022, 08:38:40 AM »
INTERNET CHAMPIONSHIP TRIPLE THREAT

Narrator:  Bea is still in Lawrenceville, Georgia, as she and Bill have things to take care of before traveling to Reno for Inception V. I will turn you over to Bea for her comments concerning her Triple Threat match where the winner earns a shot at the Bombshell Internet Champion at Blaze of Glory X.

The scene switches to the home of Bea Barnhart in Lawrenceville, Georgia. She is in the living room of their home with her husband, Bill Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, and the three are sitting on the couch.

BE CONFIDENT IN YOUR ABILITIES

Bill:  How are you feeling going into your Triple Threat match to earn a shot at the Bombshell Internet Champion at Blaze of Glory X?

Bea:  I’m confident. I never doubt my abilities in the wrestling ring. I’m going to win and then when I challenge for the Bombshell Internet Champion I’ll win that match and become Sin City Wrestling Bombshell Internet Champion.

Bill:  Always nice to go into a match with confidence as long as the person going into the match isn’t over-confident.

Bea:  Speaking of confidence I want to show you something Iris did recently that shows her confidence is improving.

Bill:  This should be amusing.

Bea:  I assure you it is. Iris come here to Mommy so you can do your dance to the song I have for you.

Iris happily waddles over to Mommy Bea. Bea ells Iris she will play the song for her which is a modified version of Right Said Fred’s I’M TOO SEXY. Iris gets excited as she knows she’s going to do her dance to the song. Bea starts the music. As we listen to the song, and take in the modified lyrics, Iris dances around the room moving to the music and shaking her butt.

I’m too sexy for my collar
I’m too sexy for my leash
I’m too sexy for my dog food
I’m too sexy for my fleas

I’m too sexy for my Vet
I’m too sexy to be your pet
I’m too sexy
I’m. . .too. . .sexy!!!

Iris stops dancing when the music stops. She looks at Mommy Bea with pleading eyes to play the music again so she can dance again but Bea has to inform Iris that her dance routine is over and that she has to present her comments to the viewers for her upcoming match in Inception V. Bill calls Iris to him and she comes to him. The two take off to go to Sweetwater Park for a walk so Bea will not be interrupted when presenting her comments for her upcoming match. Bea returns to sitting on the couch for her presentation.

PRIOR HISTORY IN THE RING DOESN’T MEAN A THING

Bea:  Now that Bill and Iris are gone I can focus on my comments. At Inception V I’m in a Triple Threat match against Danielle Weston and Seleana Zdunich.

Bea smiles.

Bea:  Danielle I see you’ve held the Bombshell Championship at one time. I don’t see any other Championships with your name listed so apparently you’re not as accomplished as you think you are. Being a legend in your own mind is one thing. Translating that into defeating me is another thing. Good luck trying.

Bea presents a large grin this time.

Bea:  As for you, Seleana, the story is different but it will have the same ending as I mentioned for Danielle. We’ve had five matches against each other. Four of those matches were Singles and one was a Triple Threat. You won all of those matches and I can’t state anything but the truth that you won. . .I lost. . .that’s how the sport of wrestling goes sometimes. But now, Seleana, in this Triple Threat, I’m in this match to win. I’m in this match to earn my shot at the Bombshell Internet Champion at Blaze of Glory X. I hope you’re ready to lose to me because I’m ready to win over you and Danielle and then become Sin City Wrestling Bombshell Internet Champion.

SOME PEOPLE DON’T UNDERSTAND COMMENTS FROM OTHERS

Bea:  You two remind me of a friend of mine here in the Lawrenceville, Georgia, area. Kathy is also a Filipina like me. She had a baby girl she named Leah. When she brought Leah to visit us I made the comment  that since her name is Leah she is a Princess like Princess Leah in the movie Star Wars. Kathy got pissed off and yelled at me SHE’S NOT A PRINCESS!!! I was shocked that someone could be that huge of a jerk over an innocent comment so I replied that if she’s not a princess then what the hell is she an Ogre like Fiona from the movie Shrek? At that comment Kathy left and never spoke to me again. Like I give a damn that she’s out of my life and won’t speak to me any longer right? Silence is golden. She couldn’t take a compliment so she tried to turn it on me that I made a rude comment about her baby daughter. I’m sure both of you are going to stop talking to me after I defeat you and earn the right to face the Bombshell Internet Champion at Blaze of Glory X. Do you think you two turning your backs on me and not talking to me is a punishment? Nope! It’s a blessing!

ARE THEY DUMB ASS COMMENTS OR SMART ASS COMMENTS?

Bea picks up a sheet of paper from the coffee table.

Bea:  Well, Girls, what does it all come down to? Oh? You have a problem with me calling you girls instead of women? I have my reasons for calling you what you are because you’re not mature and dignified as I am. What I want to talk to you about is the normal dumb ass and smart ass comments you, and other wrestlers, make toward me. You probably think you’re so smart spewing forth comments which are classified as dumb ass or smart ass in nature. Want to know something? Want to get educated? Want to be enlightened? When you look up the terms Dumb Ass and Smart Ass comments you find something interesting.

Bea holds up her sheet of paper and begins to list the information on the sheet.

Bea:  The official definition of a Dumb Ass comment is a statement or comment someone makes to try to appear intelligent and it backfires on them because their statement is stupid compared with the facts. Now do you want to know what the official definition of a Smart Ass comment is? It is a statement or comment someone makes to try to appear intelligent and it backfires on them because their statement is stupid compared with the facts. Holy Shit Batman! Both a Dumb Ass comment and a Smart Ass comment have exactly the same definition! So I have to ask why do we have two different terms for the same type of stupid comments people make? I guess we’ll never know the answer to that. Just like you two will claim to never know the answer why you two lost to me in our upcoming match.

Bea returns the sheet of paper to the coffee table.

WANT TO CHANGE MY MIND. . .BRING IT ON

Bea:  No matter what you two say about me. No matter what you two think about me. No matter what your friends and family think about me. No matter what you attempt to do in our match. The bottom line, and the end result, is that I’m winning our match and I’m going on to face the Bombshell Internet Champion at Blaze of Glory X. Want to try to change my mind? Bring it on!

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments for today. The camera person calls into the Network to inform the Network they are cutting their camera feed. They wait a few seconds then cut their camera feed and our screen goes dark.


176
Climax Control Archives / TIME TO TAKE OUT THE TRASH
« on: December 09, 2021, 11:12:28 AM »
HERE KITTY KAT. . .TIME TO TAKE OUT THE TRASH

Narrator:  Bea is in the opening match of Climax Control 319 against Kat Jones who is new to Sin City Wrestling but not to the sport of wrestling. I will now turn you over to Bea at her home in Lawrenceville, Georgia.

The scene changes to the home of Bea Barnhart in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The camera person gets a shot of the fireplace in the home that has a warm fire burning. We don’t see Bea so of course we wonder where she is. We also don’t see Bea’s husband Bill or their English Bulldog Iris we assume they went to the park to stay out of Bea’s presentation leading up to her match against Kat Jones.

TAKE OUT THE TRASH

We don’t have to wait long before we see Bea walk into camera range holding a large trash, filled with trash, that is tied shut. Bea is told by the camera person that the camera is on and the Network is broadcasting. Bea is surprised they allowed that to happen but she cannot change what they did.

Bea:  Sorry the camera person only now told me they were live broadcasting. Please excuse me while I take out the trash. Watch me because when I face Kat Jones at Climax Control 319 I’m taking her, the trash, to the dumpster since we already have enough trashy wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling.

Bea walks to the patio door and slides it open. She walks to the trash can, opens the lid. and tosses the large bag of trash into it. Bea slams the lid shut and returns inside the house where she takes a chair near the fireplace.

Bea:  Let’s have a fireside chat shall we. I know Kat is watching so she should already know that where there is fire you’ll get burned. Kat just because you came from a pathetic wrestling federation where you managed to obtain a championship doesn’t mean shit here in Sin City Wrestling. You left a federation where a pathetic wrestler like you can win championships but you’re in the elite Federation of Sin City Wrestling now. I don’t care what the hell you did in another wrestling federation as you’re here in Sin City Wrestling now. You’re not going to walk into my territory and take me out. Nothing gets handed to anyone here. You either earn what you get or you get fired. Did you get that Kat? Fired…a fireside chat…that’s why I’m here sitting next to my fireplace. . .I’m gonna burn your ass in our match! Ha ha ha!!! I love analogies! Girl you don’t know how much fun I’m gonna have kicking your ass!

WHAT’S THE MARKET VALUE?

Bea:  Kat please allow me to give you information concerning the value of things. Me and Bill purchased our home on November 3, 2017 for $178,500. The house is a two-story house at 1,964 square feet with 3 bedrooms and 2.5 baths and our lot size is 6,000 square feet. As of November 23, 2021, the website Zillow has our house valued at $309,700 which is $131,200 more than we paid for the house in November 2017. We made a smart investment. If you, and the viewers, also want to make a smart investment then you all need to place your bets on me to win our match and all of you will make a hell of a lot of money winning the bet. However if you all want to bet on Kat Jones to win then please don’t cry to me when you lose your money on that stupid bet. Kat there’s another reason I told you about the increase in the value of our home as it does, in fact, relate to those of us in the sport of wrestling. We took care of our house and that made sure the value increased. Had we let the house run down we wouldn’t be looking at over $309,000 in value. Same with wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling. I started wrestling here and soon my value went way up. Others in the fed have pathetic wrestling abilities and their value has gone down and continues to go down. All you see them do these days is go public and demand shots at Championships when they’re not earning those shots. Never once have I demanded a shot at a Championship. It has been Management that decided which matches I got assigned to and which Championships I got a chance to challenge for. What’s the point of this you ask? When I defeat you this Sunday my value will continue to increase. When you lose to me your value will go way down. You don’t have to believe me at this time but I promise you’ll become a believer when you lose to me at Climax Control 319.

SOMEDAY NEVER COMES

Bea:  Kat you’re too young to remember the song SOMEDAY NEVER COMES by Creedence Clearwater Revival. One of the lyrics in the song goes ‘CAUSE SOMEDAY NEVER COMES. Kat I hate to have to be the wrestler to prove to you that just because you think that someday you’ll defeat me in a wrestling match that reality will never happen for you. Keep the song lyrics in your mind so you’ll always hear ‘CAUSE SOMEDAY NEVER COMES because you’ll never be able to defeat me. To give you an example there’s one wrestler in Sin City Wrestling who I’ve defeated FOUR times in FOUR matches. Yes, Kat, you heard me correctly. And even with that this same wrestler, who has never defeated me, claims I’ll never be able to defeat her. I’ll not mention her name but if you ask around you can find out who it is. It is going to be the same with you Kat. No way in hell you’re going to defeat me this match, or any other match, because that someday for you is never going to come.

Bea informs the camera person that she will take a short break before returning to her comments. She informs the camera person to have the Network run a video of her on Twitter until she returns from her break. Bea stands up and walks out of the room and the video of her on Twitter runs.

MORONS ON TWITTER

While Bea is taking a short break from her comments the Network runs the video of Bea reading comments on Twitter.

Bea:  I get sick of morons getting on Twitter asking why I didn’t comment on this or that. They demand to know why, since they posted negative comments about me, I didn’t respond. They call me a coward for not being a Twitter whore like they are and the answer is obvious that I don’t lower myself to their level. They always try to get others to whore themselves out on Twitter and they get pissed off when those of us who are intelligent and self-confident don’t follow their bullshit. Listen up carefully. When I have something I want to comment on I might say it on Twitter, or in a promo, or in comments before my match starts. But if I don’t want to comment on anything at the time then I most likely won’t comment.  Also when you go off on me because I didn’t whore myself out on Twitter like you did remember that I do my best talking with my actions in the ring in my matches. And to think morons like those on Twitter actually think they’re something people care about.

MORONS OUTSIDE OF TWITTER

Bea rolls her eyes.

Bea:  It isn’t just the morons on Twitter who I refer to as Twitter whores who make me roll my eyes in disgust. There are people like them everywhere. Week after week after week I hear the same bullshit from the other wrestlers. They want to know why I don’t show videos of myself in sparring matches like they do. They want to know why I don’t live stream my training sessions like they do. They want to know why I don’t do everything the way they do it. BECAUSE I’M MY OWN PERSON AND I DAMN SURE DO WHAT I WANT, WHEN I WANT, AND HOW I WANT! So there you have it. Just because I don’t do everything the way the rest of you do doesn’t mean I’m not doing it. I feel it is not your business to know every damn thing I do. My job getting in front of the camera to comment on upcoming matches is to comment on upcoming matches and on my opponents. All the other stuff, the non-wrestling related stuff is, for me anyway, not what I’m before the camera to do. If you don’t like that about me then turn and walk away but please keep your sarcastic bitchy foolish comments to yourself.

JUST ANOTHER ANNOYING FLY ON THE WALL

Bea returns to the living room as the Network has finished running the video from Bea reading comments on Twitter. Bea returns to her seat next to the fireplace. Just as Bea is about to continue her comments a Fly goes by and lands on the wall next to the fireplace. Bea stands up and walks over to where her flyswatter is hanging and she grabs it and returns to the wall where the fly is waiting.

Bea:  So, Kat, you want to be a fly on the wall to try to spy on me day and night in hopes you might find a flaw in me that you can capitalize on in our match? WHAP!!!

Bea whacks the fly with the flyswatter and the fly dies and lands hard on the floor.

Bea:  Yeah that’s what I thought Kat. You’re nothing more than an annoying thing flying around and when you land I knock you out of the picture and most likely knock you out literally. I don’t tolerate annoying pests and you’re just a pathetic little annoying bug. Time for me to swat you out of Sin City Wrestling.


177
Climax Control Archives / BULLSHIT. . .FLAT OUT BULLSHIT!!!
« on: November 24, 2021, 12:12:05 PM »
BULLSHIT. . .FLAT OUT BULLSHIT!!!

Narrator:  This match for the World Bombshell Championship for Bea Barnhart came as a surprise. After the cowardly beat down of her husband, Bill Barnhart, and their friend Senor Vinnie, Bea demanded action be taken because of the cowardly attack by Mac Bane, Ken Davison, Supreme Machine, and Dominick Strife, for their actions. When Management came up with forcing Amber Ryan, who is Mac Bane’s wife, to defend the World Bombshell Championship against Bea. . .well. . .shit happens and it damn sure did in this case.

AT STANFORD, CALIFORNIA, READY FOR CLIMAX CONTROL 317

SOMEONE FAILED TO DO THEIR JOB PROPERLY

The scene changes and we are taken to the hotel room of Bea Barnhart which is near Stanford University in California. We see Bea is pacing back and forth, stomping her feet, and yelling stuff. She’s obviously still pissed off over the attack on Bill and Vinnie at Climax Control 316. Since this is not what we normally see in a Bea Barnhart promo segment we wonder if perhaps the camera person inadvertently left their camera running after they ran a test to ensure the camera is working properly.

Bea:  Arghhhh! There’s gonna be hell to pay for the bullshit attacks Mac and his goons continue to do upon Bill and Vinnie.!It takes a special type of coward to have to attack others two-on-one, three-on-two, and four-on-two, like those weak assholes have been doing!

Bea kicks one of the chairs then she spins around and heads back in the other direction.

Bea:  At least my complaint to Management was understood and they took action against Mac as he is the ringleader of the group of thugs! I feel bad Amber Ryan has to take the punishment since I’m not allowed to be assigned to take on Mac one-on-one!

While Bea is ranting on the cheap attacks by Mac and company she glances over to see the camera person show up and stand next to their camera and they start to go over the camera to ensure it is still working properly. Bea asks the camera person if the camera has been on all this time and the person realizes they forgot to turn the camera feed off before taking a break. They apologize to Bea for the mistake but Bea goes nuclear on them.

Bea:  I should contact your Supervisor and have you fired! You don’t set up your camera and leave it running! People involved might do or say something that gets broadcast to the public and then your company ends up with a lawsuit! I can’t undo what you did to me but you damn sure better toe the line from here out or your job at the Network is over is that clear?

The camera person assures Bea there will not be any further glitches in the broadcast. Bea takes a few minutes to calm down and then she informs the camera person she is ready to go live to broadcast her comments on her upcoming match. The camera person informs Bea when they are live broadcasting and she launches into her comments.

WHAT CAUSED THIS MATCH WITH AMBER RYAN TO HAPPEN

Bea:  It is obvious that Bill and Iris are not with me on this trip. Bill went home after Climax Control 316 and he has been under the care of our family physician, Doctor Kim, for the injuries he sustained at the hands of Mac Bane and his three thugs. Our neighbor, Peter, offered to take care of Iris at his home since he lives three houses down and has a dog to keep Iris company.

Bea is about to continue with her comments when her cell phone rings. When she looks at the Caller ID she sees the call is from her husband Bill.

Bea:  I apologize for the interruption but this call is from Bill. To show you how transparent I am, as compared to the rest of you in Sin City Wrestling, I’ll place my call on speaker so everyone knows what we’re discussing so nobody has to take hallucinating drugs and then in their drug-induced state of mind try to make up what me and Bill talked about. Thanks for the call, Bill, but you need to know I’m just starting to air my comments for my upcoming match so if we can keep this call short I can get back to my comments on the match.

Bill:  That’s easy to do. I’m calling to let you know what Doctor Kim said about my condition after being attacked by cowards at Climax Control 316.

Bea:  What did Doctor Kim say?

Bill:  He said X-Rays came out fine. He said other than having some bruises, both external and internal, and several scratches and cuts, I’m good to go whenever I’m ready.

Bea:  Great news! I was concerned that you might have sustained more severe injuries but you’re tougher than your attackers thought you were.

Bill:  Let me provide a quick reminder for the viewers of how tough I am. I told the story numerous times of the feud between me and my half-brother Chris Shipman. He vowed to kill me. Yes he vowed to end my life for HIS poor choices in his life which included him being found guilty of the death of our sister. Back in the previous Wrestling Federation we worked in for ten years we were always assigned to the most vile, vicious, and career ending, matches ever known to the sport of wrestling and most of those matches were so evil, demonic, and dangerous, they are permanently banned from the sport of wrestling. Today I’m still in the sport of wrestling. I’m still holding a Championship. I still never back down. And I’m still alive. But where is Chris Shipman? After failing to take me out I guess Chris Shipman either quit trying and went into hiding or maybe he’s already deceased. I don’t know and I don’t care. The cowardly attack by Mac and his thugs will come back to haunt them. I’ve taken enough of your air time Bea so I’ll end the call and you continue with your comments. And you can thank Mac and his goons for you getting this shot at the World Bombshell Championship.

Bea:  Thanks Bill.

Bea ends the call then returns to her match comments.

BULLSHIT. . .FLAT OUT BULLSHIT

Bea:  That attack on Bill and Vinnie at Climax Control 316 was BULLSHIT! Just flat out BULLSHIT!!! Since the cowardly, chickenshit, bullshit, four-on-two beat down of my husband, Bill Barnhart and Senor Vinnie, by Mac Bane, Ken Davison, Dominick Strife, and Supreme Machine, after their match was over, and after Bill won the match by taking out Dominick, I’m more than pissed off. I protested to Management and demanded action be taken against those four cowards and I left the decision in their hands. The next thing I know I’m on the Climax Control 317 card, in the Main Event, facing Amber Ryan for the World Bombshell Championship. They say you should never question when opportunities like this drop in your lap. This is how Karma works and I’m glad Management saw that something needed to be done about the assault.

Bea pauses her comments for a moment.

Bea:  I guess Management figured since Mac Bane is the ringmaster calling the shots that he should be punished the most for the brutal after-match beat down he and his thugs perpetrated on Bill and Vinnie. The way I remember how things were supposed to go was that the World Bombshell Championship was going to be defended at the last Climax Control of 2021. Well that quickly changed eh Amber? The actions by your cowardly husband has now cost you as you have to defend the World Bombshell Championship against me sooner than you wanted to defend it. We’ve had only one match together and that was a Bombshell World Championship Qualifier match and you won over me by submission. I commend you on that win but your one win doesn’t equate into another one. This time you face a pissed off woman who had her husband brutally attacked after his match was over and if you think I’m not going to take my anger out on you, for what your cowardly husband and his thugs did, then you’re damn sure more stupid than I thought you were!

Bea pauses her comments again but this time it is to take a drink of water before continuing with her comments.

EXPECTATIONS FOR MY MATCH

Bea:  I don’t expect to win this match against you Amber. Now now now before you get the giggles and piss in your panties and think I’m conceding the match you need to wipe that huge grin off your face and listen up. Since your husband, Mac, proved himself to be a coward that tells me you’re also a coward as you didn’t seem to do anything to prevent him from attacking Bill and Vinnie. Back to my comment that I don’t expect to win this match against you please allow me to clarify that comment. I don’t expect to get the win over you when I’m sure you’ve already arranged for Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine to interfere in our match and threaten to beat me down. Yes I honestly expect that from you as you weren’t expecting to meet me in a Championship defense match this soon. I assure you if you and your four cowardly thugs interfere in our match and cause me to lose I’ll not stop working to destroy you and them for what they did. Yes I know their interference will cause you to lose the match, and I’ll get the official win on my record, but under normal circumstances when a Champion loses a Championship Defense match because they got disqualified that they lose the match but not their Championship. The only way I can see Management fixing the anticipated interference by your four thugs is to add to our match that even if you lose by Disqualification to me you’ll also lose the World Bombshell Championship to me. That’s their call to make so we’ll see what they decide to do. Perhaps that’s the only way to get this bullshit of interference and after-match beat downs to stop.

Bea pauses her comments to reach over on the couch and pick up a small black bag. Bea opens the zipper of the bag and pulls out two clay characters we’re familiar with. One is the clay character Mister Bill and the other is his ever-present tormenter Mister Sluggo. Bea holds them on her lap.

OH NOOOOO!!!!! BEA’S GONNA BE MEAN TO ME!!!

Bea:  Unless you live under a rock with no television you know who Mister Bill and Mister Sluggo are. Mister Sluggo constantly beats up and tortures Mister Bill in every episode of their adventures and he has the help of Mister Hands in these disgusting attacks. Notice that Mister Sluggo is just like Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine in that they need help to take out one person. Before Bill returned to Lawrenceville, Georgia, he told me when he returns to action in the wrestling ring he’s going into destroy mode and Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine are on his shit list. Amber in our match you’re the clay character Mister Bill and I’m Mister Sluggo and I’m going to be mean to you as Mister Sluggo always is to Mister Bill. Again, as I previously mentioned, if your four pathetic goons don’t get involved in our match the World Bombshell Championship is mine. If they get involved and cost me the match I can only hope Management allows me to earn the Championship from you as you had to have help, against the rules, to Disqualify yourself to try to retain the Championship even though I defeated you.

Bea returns the two clay characters into the small bag and places it on the coffee table in front of the couch she is sitting on.

WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU HAVE ME DONE AWAY WITH

Bea:  Amber have you heard of the man named Rasputin? I’ll venture a guess you’re not intelligent enough to know facts about history. Even if you did I believe you’re so mentally dense you wouldn’t remember it anyway. I believe you’re so mentally deficient that you cannot even recall what you ate for your last meal. Let me tell you about Rasputin. So many wanted him “put out of the way” which is a mild term for killed. So many people also want my husband, Bill Barnhart, out of the way but they’ve always failed. Remember if Bill’s half-brother Chris Shipman wasn’t able to take Bill all the way out after ten years of trying then for damn sure your four goons aren’t gonna be able to accomplish it. Going back to Rasputin those who wanted to kill him poisoned him on numerous occasions and he wouldn’t die. Be careful who you run up to and try to take them out as it often blows up in your face.

Bea pauses once again to take a drink of water.

WRESTLING IS LIKE A GAME OF CHESS

Bea:  Amber I would ask you if you ever played the game of Chess, or if you even know what the game is about, but I would hate to pose that question only to have the two or three working brain cells you have left blow out and then you become more moronic than you already are. Chess is a board game. There are various pieces players use in the game and each playing piece can only move in specific directions. It is a thinking game, which immediately puts you at a disadvantage, because you didn’t think to take action against your four thugs and prevent them from perpetrating the attack on Bill and Vinnie. But, as useless as an explanation of Chess is to explain to idiots, I’ll still explain the concept of the game to you as there are viewers who can comprehend what I’m saying even if you can’t. In the game of Chess you should always look ahead several moves. Even if your opponent manages to do something that makes you change the several moves ahead you already planned you have the ability to quickly adapt and take your opponent out while at the same time keeping a list of several moves ahead to keep your opponent hesitating. I enter every match like a Chess game. I have everything figured out. If my opponent does something strange or unexpected I’m able to quickly maneuver and get back on track to where I’m in control of the match. And just so you know, as I hate opponents who whine that they were not warned ahead of time, I have the ability to quickly adapt should you go off on some wild tangent and I have people watching our match to ensure any attempted interference from your four thugs will be dealt with appropriately and quickly. Here’s the bottom line Amber:  CHECKMATE!!! I win!!!

Bea pauses her comments to get up and walk into the kitchen area where she returns with a plate of cookies to go along with her drinks of water. Bea devours several cookies then washes them down with a drink of water before placing the dish with the cookies on it on the coffee table in front of the couch.

GUILTY BY ASSOCIATION

Bea:  Amber I can’t hold you responsible for what Mac and his goons did to Bill after their match at Climax Control 316. Well I can’t hold you accountable at this time anyway. I’m still doing research to find out if you had anything to do with that vile disgusting and illegal beat down on Bill and Vinnie at Climax Control 316. If, between now and our match, I find out you had something to do with that attack you’ll pay heavily for your involvement. If I’m unable to find out if you had something to do with the attack then you’re either innocent of being involved in the attack or you’re damn good at hiding the truth. For your well-being I damn sure hope I don’t find out you were involved.

Bea informs the camera person she’s ready to make closing comments. The camera person passes that information onto the Network and the Network tells them when Bea is done with her final comments they are to cut their camera feed and the Network will take over the air time from there.

Bea:  Amber you and everyone in Sin City Wrestling know that me and Bill are fair and honest people. We realize other wrestlers who are pathetic often act violent to cover up their shortcomings in the wrestling ring. We realize other wrestlers are intimidated by us. Most wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling hurl insults and demeaning comments at us. Yet with all that crap going around we’ve maintained our composure so as not to be labeled as over-violent and mean. So you can hurl insults and demeaning comments at me if you want as I’m not intimidated by your bullshit threats. All you and the other wrestlers earn by hurling crap at me is an ass kicking. And after what your four did to Bill and Vinnie I’m not holding back in our match. And to make sure you and Mac and your goons behave I’ll ask for Senor Vinnie to be my corner person and we’ve talked with numerous wrestlers to be standing by in case your four goons try any crap. Good luck Amber. You’re damn sure gonna need it!

Bea is done with her comments and the camera person cuts their camera feed and the Network returns to regularly scheduled programming.


178
Climax Control Archives / KARMA'S A BITCH AND I'M KARMA'S HIT MAN
« on: November 16, 2021, 06:37:12 PM »
KARMA’S A BITCH AND I’M KARMA’S HIT MAN

Narrator:  Before coming on screen to give you the introduction to Bill Barnhart’s comments on his upcoming match  I had a meeting with Bill and he told me the general concept of what he plans on talking about. Simply put Bill said that Karma is a bitch and that he’s Karma’s hit man. With that out of the way I turn you over to Bill Barnhart.

The scene switches and we see Bill Barnhart in his room at a hotel near the Provident Credit Union Event Center in San Jose, California. With him in the room is his wife and Manager, Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris. Bill looks into the camera and launches into his comments.

Bill:  There’s a statement that goes KARMA’S ONLY A BITCH IF YOU ARE. Applying that to our oppoents, who are backed by Mac Bane and Ken Davison, they’re all a bitch and will be taken out by Karma. I want you to know I’m Karma’s hit man. Damn it’s fun being Karma’s hit man! Since Mac Bane and Ken Davison are both a bitch and they are standing behind the tag team of Dominick Strife and Supreme Machine, we already know they will get involved in the match to attempt to screw us out of the win. I’m here to let them know  if they get involved in the match in any manner, except to offer support and give suggestions and advice to Dominic and Supreme Machine, then all the rules are off the table and anything goes. I assure Mac and Ken that getting involved in this match, and getting destroyed by us in the process, is not what they want. Now that I have those comments out of the way I wish to address other items before getting into direct comments concerning our match.

BACK TO AN INCIDENT DURING BILL’S HIGH SCHOOL DAYS

We are taken back to when Bill Barnhart was attending Skyline High School in Oakland, California. We see Bill and his friend Steve parked on the side of a street, with Bill’s car, when another car drives up and stops. Two classmates from Skyline High School, Jerry and John, who hate Bill and Steve, get out of the other car and confront Bill and Steve.

Bill:  Oh, great, the scum of the Earth just showed up to give us some shit.

Steve:  We got this Bill.

Jerry:  Oh, look, two f*cking losers, Bill and Steve, ready to get their asses kicked.

John:  Are you two ready to get beat down?

Bill and Steve look at each other, then they look at Jerry and John. Bill and Steve flip their middle finger at Jerry and John and tell them to f*ck off.

Jerry:  Wrong move to try to intimidate us.

John:  You’re gonna get hurt now!

Jerry and John charge Bill and Steve and try landing blows but they miss terribly. Bill and Steve land several blows then they shove Jerry and John to the ground then they get into Bill’s car, start the engine, and threaten to run over Jerry and John. Jerry and John wisely get into their car and try to take off to avoid getting whacked by Bill’s car. Since Jerry and John are scared shitless they swerve into traffic and get hit by an oncoming car. Fortunately for Jerry and John the other car didn’t cause enough damage to injure them but their driver’s side door is crushed and there’s enough other damage to prevent them from moving the car. Bill and Steve pull up alongside Jerry’s car, roll down their windows, and yell at Jerry and John.

Steve:  That will teach you not to mess with us! Ha ha ha!

Bill:  That shows you assholes how Karma works. Karma rose up and slam dunked you for trying to do something illegal. I’m glad I’m associated with Karma as it sure is fun being Karma’s hit man!

At that comment Bill hits the gas and speeds off down the road. He looks in his rearview mirror to see the police showing up to investigate the accident. Knowing Jerry is going to get arrested Bill and Steve do a HIGH FIVE and continue driving off into the distance.

RETURN TO CURRENT TIME

Bill:  Ahhh I remember an incident when our former friends Jerry and John attacked me and my friend Steve and we got the advantage on them and then Karma rose up and kicked their ass. It’s always fun to watch Karma work to f*ck people up who are assholes. Speaking of assholes we have a match at Climax Control 316 where we face a pathetic tag team consisting of Dominick Strife and Supreme Machine. They have the backing of Mac Bane and Ken Davison. I find it amusing that two losers are being backed by two losers. Double losers are amusing. Mac. . .Ken. . .the only reason you are involved in this match is to interfere in the match to try to screw me and Vinnie out of the win. That’s not gonna happen. Not in this match. . .not in our nexte match. . .not ever. You seem to be able to talk the talk but you’re not able to walk the walk. I’m telling you now, before the match happens, so that you cannot claim you didn’t know, if you get involved in the match and try to interfere in the match in any manner, all rules will be thrown out and it is all out war. Me and Vinnie are not going to get screwed over by pathetic jerks who can’t face us directly so they have to try to gang up on us. Nice try but that shit won’t work against me and Vinnie.

Bill grins toward the camera.

Bill:  D’oh!!! Dominick, Supreme Machine, Mac, and Ken, you know that exclamation from The Simpsons. That’s the common thing Homer Simpson utters when he realizes he f*cked up. You four will be uttering that exclamation, and many more, if you try to cheat or interfere in the match and me and Vinnie give you the beat down of a lifetime. You’ll utter that exclamation when you realize you should have just shut the f*ck up and turned around and walked away. I don’t take shit from anyone and neither does Vinnie.

CALLING FOR HELP FROM JESUS OR AN EXCLAMATION KNOWING YOU’RE TOAST?

Bill:  One of my close friends during High School was Steve Truelson. We used to do sleepovers at each other’s house all the time. We were always getting into trouble with our parents but we didn’t care. During one sleepover at Steve’s house we stayed up late and we decided to shoot off fireworks. We set off fireworks outside Steve’s bedroom door which led to the walkway on the side of the house then jumped into bed to pretend we were asleep to make it look like it wasn’t us who did the fireworks. I remember my friend’s father, Clyde, woke up from his sleep due to the noise and he yelled what I thought was CHEEZ-IT like the crackers. I asked Steve if he thinks his father is hungry and he asked me why I asked that question. I said because Clyde is yelling for CHEEZ-IT so I thought he wanted crackers. Steve laughed and told me his father wasn’t yelling for CHEEZ-IT to get crackers he was using the name of Jesus as a curse word by screaming out JESUS!!! as more of a curse.

Bill lets out a loud laugh.

Bill:  Mac, Ken, Dominick, and Supreme Machine, I told you that story about Steve’s father, Clyde, for a reason. First for Dominick and Supreme Machine if you play by the rules of our match and don’t cheat, don’t violate the rules, and don’t have Mac and Ken interfere in the match you’ll lose the match but we promise not to seriously hurt you. However if you cheat, violate the rules, or have Mac or Ken interfere in the match, you’ll get severely hurt and may end up retiring from wrestling. Is that a threat? Nope! That’s a promise! As for Mac and Ken I state publicly that if you have to resort to cheap shots, cheating, and attacks on other wrestlers, to try to get noticed then you’re damn sure more pathetic than I thought. Me and Vinnie don’t cheat. Me and Vinnie don’t rely on interference in our matches. However me and Vinnie take revenge on those who pull that crap on us. You have a choice to make. Play by the rules or get taken out and possibly sent into retirement. That’s not a choice me and Vinnie have to make. That a choice you four have to make. Remember, though, that you have to live with the choice you make. If you start the attack on us then me and Vinnie will finish it and you’ll get hurt. You can call on God, Satan or Jesus. . .or even CHEESE-IT crackers, but I tell you there are not enough supernatural powers, or CHEESE-IT crackers, in the Universe that you can call on to help you beat us down. If you think I’m joking then try. . .just try. . .I dare you.

CLOSING COMENTS

Bill:  For our opponents, Supreme Machine and Dominick I let you know that myself and Vinnie will not tolerate any cheating or interference. If you need the help of Mac and Ken to defeat us then you are two pathetic pieces of shit and need to be flushed down the toilet. As for Mac and Ken you need to know that your actions have an effect on how you’re seen by the other wrestlers and the fans. If you want to cheat and interfere in the match to help your two puppets, Supreme Machine and Dominick, get a cheap win, that’s fine as I’ve already told you we’ll deal with that in more than one way. One thing I hate with a passion are cheaters, liars, and people with illegal behavior. Me and Vinnie have had enough of the bullshit from the rest of the Roster. Your puppets wrestlers, and you two, either play the game by the rules or your wrestling careers are over. Your choice to make. We’ve made our choice. See you on November 21, 2021, at Climax Control 316.

Bill informs the camera person that he’s done with his comments. They call into the Network to tell them that and the Network tells them to cut their camera feed and when the camera person cuts their camera feed the screen goes dark.


179
Supercard Archives / Re: "BULLDOG" BILL BARNHART (c) vs AGOSTINO ROMANO - ROULETTE TITLE
« on: November 03, 2021, 10:28:54 AM »
I’LL WIN MY MATCH AND RETAIN MY ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP

Narrator:  Bill has a nice presentation today. That is all I am going to say today. I turn you over to Bill Barnhart to give you the information you need.

The scene changes to the hotel room of Bill and Bea Barnhart located near Madison Square Garden in New York City. Bea and Iris are not around so we assume Bea took Iris out for a walk. Bill gets comfortable on the couch then when the camera person informs him they are live broadcasting he launches into his comments for his upcoming match.

BILL IS THE VERY MODEL OF A MODEL ROULETTE CHAMPION

Bill:  The first thing I wish to do is show you a video of a song from the musical The Pirates of Penzance. It’s called The Major General Song. Please watch the video so you know how the song goes then I’ll give you my version of it as it relates to me as Sin City Wrestling Roulette Champion.

The Network puts up the video of the performance of The Major General Song for the viewers to watch.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW MAJOR GENERAL SONG

After the Major General Song video is done we return to Bill Barnhart.

Bill:  The persons who accept that role in the musical The Pirates of Penzance have a very difficult song to sing at that pace and to remember every word. Now that you’ve seen the original version, and heard the original lyrics, I now give you the Bill Barnhart version. I’ve modified a few of the lyrics but most of the original song remains as in the video you watched.

Bill starts the music track of the song and then he launches into singing the lyrics of his version of the song.

I am the very model of a modern Roulette Champion
And I promised everyone that I would get the job done
I know the previous Champions and all of their reigns
But all their accomplishments are going to wane.

I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
Hmmm... lot o' news, lot o'news... Aha!
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.

I’m very good at all the many types of a Roulette match
I’m too quick and agile for my opponents to catch
I will be the best the Roulette Champion has been
I’m the very model of a modern Roulette Champion.

I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's;
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous;

I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,
I know the croaking from The Frogs of Aristophanes!
Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,
Hmmm... din afore, din afore... Aha!
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.

Then I write new history on this Championship I hold
And tell you every detail so you know that I am bold
I am better than other Roulette Champions have been
I am the very model of a modern Roulette Champion.

In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin,
When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",

When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy
Hmmm... strategy... strategy, lategy, bategy... Aha! I have it!
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee.

For my reign I promise to fight all they send my way
They will be defeated when they see that day
Again I state I will be the best Champion there has been
I am the very model of a modern Roulette Champion.

Bill’s version of the Major General song from The Pirates of Penzance ends and Bill returns to his comments.

Bill:  Trust me, Agostino, and others wanting a shot at my Roulette Championship, that I can not only sing that fast and not miss a beat or the lyrics I’m also fast in the wrestling ring and don’t miss a move, hold, or maneuver. Agostino you’ll find out that you’re no match for me. I’ve always said that people need to either lead by example or get the hell out of the way. That’s why I’m leading by example and you need to get out of my way. That translates into both my personal life and my professional wrestling life. Agostino you haven’t been leading by example here in Sin City Wrestling. Yes you’ve had a few success moments but they seem to be very rare things in your wrestling career. If you’re coming into our match wishing for a success moment you’ll be sadly disappointed as you’re going to lose to me.

YOU THOUGHT MOTORCYCLE RACING WAS TOUGH. . .I’M A HELL OF A LOT TOUGHER

Bill:  Agostino you’re a former professional motorcycle racer. Hmmm! Makes me wonder why you quit racing motorcycles and went into the sport of wrestling. Was the competition too strong for you in racing? Were the motorcycles more than you could handle? Seems to me to walk away from a career in motorcycle racing to become a wrestler isn’t the expected career move. But, Romano, I’ll make a promise to you since, apparently, racing motorcycles was too difficult for you to remain in the sport. After I defeat you to retain my Roulette Championship I’ll make a purchase of mild child versions of transportation that you should be able to handle and not get hurt using. Like a tricycle, a push scooter, maybe a hover board but only one that moves really really slow. I was thinking about getting you roller skates but if you were to get injured using them you might want to hold me responsible for your injuries. Making fun of you probably ticks you off and the fans apparently want to support you over me and that’s okay. I don’t care if your feelings are hurt and you’re mad at me for teasing you. I don’t give a damn if the fans support me or not. I’m in the sport of wrestling to have fun, enjoy my matches and, as you saw recently, earn Championships. And, Agostino, when you fall off your children’s tricycle and get hurt don’t try to sue me for damages you sustained because you’re klutz.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bill:  Agostino I expected  quality comments from you over the past several months and even more leading up to our match at High Stakes XI. Wishful thinking on my part I suppose. I mean, come on, you’re going up against me to try to defeat me for the Roulette Championship so I expected I’d get from you interesting, imaginative, high quality, gold plated, comments for our match but instead what I got from you was boring, lame, low quality, and shit plated, comments. Please allow me to ask you a another question. Yeah I know you don’t want to answer more questions but your unwillingness to participate doesn’t mean anything to me. I have to ask you if you’re getting your inspiration from a do-it-yourself instruction book titled HOW TO WRITE IDIOTIC AND MORONIC WRESTLING PROMOS THAT MAKE YOU SOUND DUMBER THAN YOU REALLY ARE. . .FOR DUMMIES. I honestly can’t think of any other reason for you to air moronic lame crap. Come on! Use your brain and come up with original comments and not a bunch of canned stuff you read out of a do-it-yourself instruction book! I look forward to destroying you in our match at High Stakes XI.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

Bill flashes a huge grin into the camera.

Bill:  Agostino when I get done beating the hell out of you there’s a chance you may want to retire from the sport of wrestling to go off into a less dangerous way of life. I’m thinking when you retire from wrestling you can go back to sports where you can still do competitive racing. Since racing motorcycles was obviously too much for you to handle, which caused you to make a decision to enter the sport of wrestling, perhaps returning to motorcycle wrestling wouldn’t be the right move as you may get hurt at those speeds. So how about you consider milder forms of racing when you retire? Things like tricycle racing because at least when you fall you won’t have that far to travel before hitting the pavement. Har har har!!!

Bill informs the camera person he is done with his comments. The graphic comes off the screen then the camera person cuts their camera feed and our screen goes dark.


180
Supercard Archives / Re: BELLA MADISON vs SELEANA ZDUNICH vs VIOLET AMELIA HOLT vs BEA BARNHART
« on: November 03, 2021, 10:27:07 AM »
FOUR CHALLENGERS ENTER THE RING. ONLY ONE. . .ME. . .EARNS A SHOT AT THE WORLD BOMBSHELL CHAMPION AT THE FINAL CLIMAX CONTROL OF 2021 ON DECEMBER 19, 2021

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart told me she hates liars. With that simple opening comment out of the way I turn you over to Bea Barnhart.

Bea Barnhart is seen sitting in a Starbucks near Madison Square Garden having a snack and coffee.

I HATE LIARS

Bea:  Thanks for joining me today. I’m sure your first question is what food I’m eating and what drink I’m drinking. What I’m eating and drinking has no connection to my upcoming match at High Stakes XI so shut the hell up and stop asking about stuff that’s none of your business!  Before I launch into comments concerning my three opponents I wish to explain why I hate liars. I can’t stand people who can’t tolerate the truth so they have to lie all the time. One of the best examples of a liar is Violet Amelia Holt who claims I can never defeat her and yet she’s 0-4 against me. Oooo! I just proved her sorry ass wrong! Besides the lies Violet tells there other persons who told a lie about me. I won’t honor them by mentioning their names since their comment was so generic. . .it was just a canned statement coming from other wrestlers. . .so my comments on the statement they made about me applies to everyone.

Bea flashes a smile.

Bea:   I’m going to paraphrase the lying comment made about me. Basically the comment was that the only reason I was able to obtain the Mixed Tag Team Championship was because of my husband Bill Barnhart earning it for our team. I challenge you to go back to May 23, 2021, at Into the Void X and watch the replay of that match for the Mixed Tag Team Championship. Who was legally in the ring at that time? Me and Kate Steele. Who got the win in the match? Me when I pinned Kate Steele with a Crucifix Pin. So let me ask you the all-important question. Did I win the Mixed Tag Team Championship because Bill won that Championship match or did I win that Championship match by pinning Kate Steele and winning the championship match? I’m not going to wait for your answer because you know damn well when you review the replay of that match you’ll see you’re the liar and I’m telling the truth. Deal with the truth assholes!

THE BOTTOM LINE

Bea:  The term Bottom Line means the final results and it is usually applied to financial accounting to provide you with the bottom line totals that either shows your business made a profit or took a loss. The bottom line is that I intend to walk into our match at High Stakes XI and walk away with a profit by earning a shot at the World Bombshell Champion at the last Climax Control of 2021. Can I do it? Many are asking. The answer is yes I can, and will, do it. Will that irritate the hell out of Bella Madison, Seleana Zdunich, and Violet Amelia Holt? Yep damn sure will. Will I enjoy taking their happiness away from them? Yep. Will I enjoy going into the backstage area and hearing the three of them wailing and crying and screeching because they lost to me? Yeah that’ll also be fun but wearing headphones blasting my entrance music will easily drown out their pathetic noise.

Bea informs the camera person she is going to present final comments then they can shut down their camera feed.

Bea:  Seleana you have the most valid reason to brag against me. You’ve won all our matches against each other and I haven’t won any of them against you. I commend you on your accomplishment against me but I’m planning on ending your winning streak against me. Bella you also have a win over me. Although you have less to brag about than Seleana does the fact remains that I haven’t defeated you. . .yet. Violet, as far as you are concerned against me you already know you have no wins over me and I have four wins over you. No way in the entire Universe are you walking away from this match having eliminated me.

Bea smiles into the camera.

Bea:  Bella, Seleana, Violet, pay attention as I’m winning our match, then I’m going to win the match at the last Climax Control of 2021, then I’m going to be crowned Sin City Wrestling’s World Bombshell Champion. I know that’ll make you three, and the wrestler I defeat for the Championship, cry rivers of tears, but I don’t give a damn when I hurt your feelings! I only care that I’m walking away with a win against you three then walking away as World Bombshell Champion to end 2021. And do you want to know the best thing? There’s not a damn thing anyone can do to stop me!

Bea ends her comments and the camera person cuts their camera feed and the screen goes dark.


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