Author Topic: Easy As Shooting Fish In A Barrel  (Read 409 times)

Offline Andrew

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Easy As Shooting Fish In A Barrel
« on: January 07, 2020, 09:53:58 AM »
 *Permission obtained to comment on Cactus Pete from Senor Vinnie*

OFF CAMERA

A DREAM

The scene opens in the home of Bill and Bea Barnhart in Lawrenceville, Georgia. The scene comes on our screen and we see Bill asleep on the couch in the living room and he is snoring, grunting, mumbling, and making a bok bok bok sound, so we assume he must be having a rather interesting dream. Next thing we see is the opening of the cartoon show Super Chicken.

SUPER CHICKEN</font color>

The lyrics present on the screen.

When you find yourself in danger,
When you're threatened by a stranger,
When it looks like you will take a lickin', (bok, bok, bok)
There is someone waiting,
Who will hurry up and rescue you,
Just Call for Super Chicken! (bok ack!)

Fred, if you're afraid you'll have to overlook it,
Besides you knew the job was dangerous when you took it (bok ack!)

He will drink his super sauce
And throw the bad guys for a loss
And he will bring them in alive and kickin' (bok, bok, bok)
There is one thing you should learn
When there is no one else to turn to
Call for Super Chicken! (bok, bok, bok)
Call for Super Chicken! (bok ack!)

The opening of the Super Chicken cartoon show is over. We hear the familiar voice of Bea Barnhart.

Bea:  Bill. Bill!! BILL!!! Wake up! You are having another strange dream!

Bill is startled out of his sleep.

Bill:  Zzzzzz! Huh? Snort! What in the world is going on here? Why did you wake me up from my nap?

Bea:  You were snoring loudly and mumbling. It was strange as you were also making bok bok bok noises like a chicken.

Bill:  What? Wait. I remember the dream now. I was dreaming I was the superhero Super Chicken and Iris was my superhero sidekick Fred the Lion. We were defeating the villains, that represent the villains and mean and vile wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling, and saving the world from them. I love dreams like that.

Bea:  I think that will be the last time you eat massive amounts of pepperoni pizza and down several cans of Classic Coke as is caused you to have that type of strange dream.

Bill and Bea have a hearty laugh over the dream. We see Iris come downstairs and Bill and Bea look at each other, immediately think of Fred the Lion who is the sidekick of the superhero Super Chicken and both burst out laughing. Iris looks at Daddy Bill and Mommy Bea as if the two are insane and she snorts in their direction and then jumps up on the couch to curl up and take a nap.

Bea:  Be careful with your nap Iris. You may end up having a bizarre dream like your daddy did.

Iris:  *snort* *zzzzz*

The scene ends and after a short pause the Narrator comes on to give his lead-in to the presentation by Bill Barnhart for today.

ON CAMERA

AS EASY AS SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL

Narrator:  There is a saying IT IS AS EASY AS SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL which means something is so ridiculously easy that even the most stupid, ignorant, and incompetent person on the planet could accomplish the task. Today Bill Barnhart wants to take you back to a time when he pulled what some would call a prank on some of the backwoods hillbilly redneck types in his State of Georgia. This incident took place about a year ago and Bill Barnhart wants to share it with you to make a point.

The video of the incident Bill is presenting comes on our screen. Bill, and his English Bulldog Iris, come into the scene. Bill looks into the camera and makes a motion with his hand to follow him. When we reach our destination Bill explains it to us.

Bill:  There is a saying that goes IT IS AS EASY AS SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL and it means a task is so easy to accomplish even a moron, idiot, and the most incompetent person on the planet, could easily accomplish it. For the sake of this presentation I had my friends set up several barrels with fish in them and set them in this clearing in the woods near where I live in Lawrenceville, Georgia. We have cameras recording this prank so in the future I can present it to the viewers. I see we have a few backwoods hillbilly redneck types showing up with their guns and they are trying to shoot the fish in the barrel.

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