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122

Supercard Archives / Re: BEA BARNHART v SELEANA ZDUNICH

« on: September 08, 2021, 10:37:25 AM »

I’M MOVING UP IN THE RANKINGS WHILE SELEANA IS MOVING DOWN

Narrator:  I had a talk with Bea and I can tell you how positive she is that she will defeat Seleana Zdnuich at Violent Conduct VII. Seleana needs to be at 100 percent because if she comes to the match at 99 percent or less the match will be over quickly with Bea’s hand raised in victory.

The scene switches to a broadcast studio where we see Bea Barnhart standing in front of a graphic on the wall. Although she’s performing on the Violent Conduct VII event as a wrestler she is casually dressed today in light colored blue jeans, a white blouse, and white athletic shoes.

MOVING UP WHILE SELEANA WILL BE MOVING DOWN

Bea:  Thanks for joining me today. I’m in the broadcast studio located inside the Sullivan Arena. On the wall you see a graphic and I’m here to explain the graphic and how it relates to me, Seleana, and other wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling.

Bea picks up a pointer and walks over to the graphic on the wall.

Bea:  At the bottom of the graphic you see people who are classified as poor, weak, peasants, the working class, who try to improve their status in life as they struggle to rise from the bottom to the top. At the top you see people who are classified as rich, powerful, and business owners. In the middle you see people who were once at the bottom who are making their way to the top and others who were once at the top and are now falling on their way down to the bottom. You already know where I’m going with this. Yes I’m in the middle of the chart moving my way to up to the top. Seleana is also in the middle of the chart but she’s on her way down to the bottom.

Bea pauses her comments for a moment.

Bea:  If I could see the faces of the viewers, especially your face Seleana, I’m sure I’d see confused people. Not a problem. I’m here to enlighten and un-confuse you. Most people start at the bottom of the success ladder and desperately try to work their way up to the top. They have to fight hard to move up but the fight is worth it. . .if they make it. Those at the top, who never had to fight to get to the top since they were born into rich families that owned businesses, money, and homes where people live, are seen taking a fall from the top. Their problem is that they never had to fight for what they have. Their rich family just handed them stuff they never had to work for so they didn’t appreciate it. Damn hard to appreciate something you never had to work hard to achieve.

Bea moves her pointer from the top of the chart to the bottom to indicate the fall of the privileged few who had everything handed to them without having to work for it and now they fall because of lack of appreciation. Bea winks into the camera.

Bea:  Seleana why am I telling you this information? It is extremely easy to understand if you had a brain that worked. I started out on the bottom here in Sin City Wrestling. I didn’t come from a wrestling family that has been in the sport of wrestling for generations. I came from a humble beginning in the Philippines and only started my wrestling career a year and a half ago. I started out down at the bottom and today I place myself at the halfway point up to the top of the success chart. From what I’ve heard you got too much help in your wrestling career and got pushed to the top too quickly. Now you’re falling to the bottom because you didn’t have to work hard to obtain what you had and you appear to be having a difficult time understanding your fall. However once a person who never had to work hard to get to the top, or near the top, unless they work hard to retain what they have they start dropping down in status. Yes, Seleana, that’s what happened to you.

Bea pauses her comments to give a shocked look into the camera.

Bea:  The reason I gave that shocked look into the camera is because you remind me of all the mean girls I had to deal with growing up. You’re exactly like them. What they did was get in my face, hurl stupid and moronic insults, then act tough by calling me out and demanding I meet them under the bleachers at the school to fight them. When I showed up at the bleachers it was the same story over and over and over again. I would show up by myself and the moronic mean girl, who could talk shit but not back it up herself, would have a half dozen of her friends by her side so she could have them help her beat me down. I called her out for being the coward due to having to have six of her friends standing by her side because she knew she couldn’t take me on, one-on-one, and defeat me. I heard every ignorant threat and challenge in the book. I laughed at how pathetic she and her friends were. She, and everyone else, knew that if we could have had a one-on-one fight she would lose big time. That’s exactly what you are Seleana. You talk shit but you seem to be afraid to take me on, one-on-one, and prove that to the world that you can do it. I’m aware that you have friends and family standing by in case you need help in defeating me in our match. You can do that if you want to prove to the world that me calling you out as a coward was the truth. If anyone approaches the ring to try to help you screw me out of my win you, and those perpetrating the interference, will be dealt with harshly. You have been warned so if you still want to play the role of the stupid moronic mean girl then please go for it.

Bea gives a serious look into the camera.

Bea: Well, Seleana, I now have to drag you into the Bea Barnhart School of Hard Knocks and blow away your attitude where you think you’re better than everyone else. While you have low-mentality people out there who buy into your bragging you have people like me who research information being presented to see if it is true of if it is bullshit. I see it like this Seleana. You try to get everyone to believe you’re the best wrestler in Sin City Wrestling and that you cannot be defeated. Well you did hold two championships, that I know of, so I’ll discuss those so that people who believed your lies will now believe the truth.

Bea holds up one finger into the camera.

Bea:  Your first Championship in Sin City Wrestling, that I was able to find, was the World Bombshell Championship. You defeated Alicia Lukas on February 24, 2019, and then you lost the World Bombshell Championship back to Alicia Lukas a mere two weeks later. What the f***

Bea now holds up two fingers into the camera.

Bea:  Then I found that you obtained your second Championship in Sin City Wrestling, which was the Roulette Championship, when you defeated Violet Amelia Holt on June 21, 2020, then you lost it to Johanna Krieger about three months later. I’ll give you credit for holding the Roulette Championship for three months but the fact remains it was a short run.

Bea now makes a zero sign with hand.

Bea:  Seleana you’re quickly dropping from the top of the success chart while I’m quickly rising in success. The reason you’re falling down the success chart is because people gave you the push when you didn’t earn it and didn’t deserve it. Recently you’ve been quickly dropping in fan support, and in performance in the ring, and you’re on your way down to the bottom. On my side I’ve continued to improve my wrestling abilities and I went from the bottom of the chart to the midpoint and my defeat of you in our upcoming match will send me to the top. Although we’re meeting in the middle of the success chart for this upcoming match, where Management wants to see which one of us has what it takes to get the push to the top, and which one of us gets kicked down to the bottom, remember that while I’m on my way up the ladder of success you’re dropping down the ladder of success toward the bottom. Have an enjoyable, and incredibly fast, slide to oblivion, Seleana, because I’m damn sure enjoying my climb to stardom.

Bea informs the camera person she is done with her comments and the camera person calls into the Network and the Network returns to regularly scheduled programming.

123

Supercard Archives / Re: MALACHI v BULLDOG BILL BARNHART v CALEB STORMS - INTERNET FINALS

« on: September 01, 2021, 12:43:11 PM »

I WILL BE SIN CITY WRESTLING’S NEXT INTERNET CHAMPION

Narrator:  I spoke with Bill Barnhart before coming on camera and I am here to tell you Bill is so positive he is going to defeat Malachi and Caleb Storms that he said even if he didn’t show up for the match he would still defeat them both. I have no doubt Bill will be the next Sin City Wrestling Internet Champion.

We are taken to a shot of Bill Barnhart in what appears to be the lobby of the hotel near the Sullivan Arena where he and Bea are staying. Bill is casually dressed in blue jeans, black athletic shoes, and black pullover shirt. Bill looks into the camera to begin his comments concerning his Internet Championship match at Violent Conduct VII.

MALACHI THE COWARD

Bill:  Thanks for joining me today. I’ll explain why I’m going to be crowned as Sin City Wrestling’s Internet Champion at Violent Conduct VII. Malachi I’ll start with you since my comments concerning you will be short because you suck. Our first match against each other wasn’t a one-on-one match. It was a Mixed Tag Team match at Climax Control 273. I was kicking your pathetic ass from ring post to ring post and then you managed to tag Bella into the match and she was able to get the win over my tag team partner Bea. You were lucky to be able to get out of the ring against me or we would have won. Our second match was recently at Climax Control 310. It was the semi-final match in the Internet Championship Tournament and the winner of our match would advance to vie for the Internet Championship at Violent Conduct VII. I had you backpedaling, and running away from me, so damn much during the match that I heard people who were trying to keep score on their calculators of how many times you ran away from me that their calculators exploded as the numbers were too high for their calculators to handle. And what the hell did you do during our match at Climax Control 310? You got tired of me beating you down so you ran out of the ring and tried to hide in the stands. I dragged your sorry ass back toward the ring to toss you into the ring so I could legally defeat you and you managed to cry and whine and throw tantrums to the point where we both got counted out of the match for a Draw. At Violent Conduct VII me and you and Caleb fight it out to see who is the next Internet Champion. You’re damn sure not a factor in this match except to be less annoying than a mosquito. Your ass is mine and if I hurt you for the win, to the point you retire from wrestling, so be it.

Bill lets out a loud laugh.

CALEB STORMS WHO ONCE WAS  GREAT BUT IS NO MORE

Bill:  Now I address you Caleb. Unlike my overwhelming disgust for Malachi I have a little respect remaining for you and what you’ve accomplished in the sport of wrestling. For the benefit of the fans I’ll go over our previous matches to let everyone know what happened. Our first match was a Rock and Street Fight Roulette Rules match, at Climax Control 247, which I won when I pinned you. Damn shame on you that you were, at that time, the epitome of what Roulette Rules wrestling was about but you got your ass handed to you by me when I defeated you in a Roulette Rules match. Our second match was at Climax Control 284 where you defeated me by pinfall. Our third match was at Climax Control 253 which you again won by pinfall. Our fourth match against each other was at Climax Control 297 and for a third time you won by pinfall.

Bill claps his hands slowly in what can be interpreted as a sarcastic applause for the wrestling abilities of Caleb Storms.

Bill:  Caleb do you think I’m upset because you defeated me in three out of four matches? Nope! Do those three losses against one win cause me to have doubts going into our match at Violent Conduct VII? Nope! Am I absolutely positive I’m leaving our match as the newly crowned Internet Champion? Yep! Okay so you’re asking yourself how in the world I can be that positive when I’m 1-3 against you? Easy! While I’ve been improving, and Management has taken notice of me and what I’ve accomplished in the ring, they’ve been looking the other way when you walk toward them because you’ve been failing. When all you do is run around demanding matches, especially when you demand Championship matches, without having earned your shot, what you have is a situation where they send you out to get your ass kicked and lose. Do you think our match for Violent Conduct VII is any different Caleb? This match should have been just me and you but Malachi, the chicken shit, had to run away from my match at Climax Control 310 and try to hide in the stands. Malachi is nothing in this match. You know what I’m capable of Caleb. You know I can defeat you and hurt you enough to put you out of wrestling for some time. The winner of our match is the wrestler who can get a pinfall or submission on one of the opponents in the match. That’s so easy for me to do I can do it with one arm tied behind my back while wearing a blindfold. You want to know something Caleb? I want you to come into our match at Violent Conduct VII so over-confident that you’ll make more mistakes than you usually do during your matches. You THINK you can win Caleb but I KNOW I’ll win. Yes I really am that confident about this match.

Bill lets out a loud snorting laugh.

Bill:  Our match at Violent Conduct VII will be epic due to the fact that I have more wrestling ability and talent than both of you combined. Malachi the only thing you have more of is the cowardly yellow streak that runs down your back. You do possess wrestling abilities but what you possess is half of what Caleb possesses and about one-fourth what I possess. And for you Caleb I know I’m more talented than you and I plan on dominating you for the win in our match. I don’t want any type of wimpy win over you and Malachi. I want my win to be so overwhelming that everyone will be in awe. Think you two can stop me? Why don’t you ask the residents of New Orleans if they were able to stop Hurricane Ida. With that mental image in your minds I hope you two have a nice life leading up to our match at Violent Conduct VII because when I get done beating you two out of the sport of wrestling you will have a not-so-nice life any longer.

Bill gives the CUT sign to the camera person and they call into the Network and the Network switches back to regularly scheduled programming.

124

Supercard Archives / Re: BEA BARNHART v SELEANA ZDUNICH

« on: September 01, 2021, 12:26:41 PM »

THIRD TIME IS THE CHARM

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart is ready for her match against Seleana Zdunich at Violent Conduct VII. Bea knows she and Seleana are in this match to prove who should be bumped up in the rankings and who should drop down in the rankings and and have to work their way back up again.

When the scene switches we get a shot of Bea Barnhart in her hotel room near the Sullivan Arena in Anchorage, Alaska. Her husband, Bill Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, are not seen so we make the assumption they are out and about so they don’t interfere with her presentation for her match. The camera person informs Bea they are live broadcasting and she jumps into her comments.

THIRD TIME IS THE CHARM

Bea:  Seleana we have a match at Violent Conduct VII where the winner moves up in the rankings and the loser drops down in the rankings to work their way back up again.

Bea holds one finger up.

Bea:  Seleana please allow me to give the viewers the history between us. Our first match was on March 1, 2020, at Climax Control 261. That was my fifth match as a wrestler so I was a raw green rookie at that time. You won that match by pinfall which was pretty much expected as I was a rookie going up against a seasoned veteran. However I gave you a tough time and I know you realized that one day I would surpass you in the rankings.

Bea holds up two fingers this time.

Bea:  The second match we had was on November 8, 2020, at Climax Control 285. You won that match, also by pinfall, but I gave you a hell of a fight due to having gained more experience going into that match. Everyone, especially you Seleana, need to remember I started my wrestling career on January 5, 2020, and our match on March 1, 2020, was only my fifth match in the sport of wrestling. Our second match came on November 8, 2020, and that was nine months after I started my career in the wrestling ring. But you also have to remember that was my twentieth match in the ring. Yes I had a hell of a lot more experience on November 8, 2020, than I did on March 1, 2020, but at that time you still had more experience and you were able to win that match also.

Bea holds three fingers up this time.

Bea:  The saying goes THE THIRD TIME IS THE CHARM and I’ll prove this saying to be true when I defeat you and move up in the rankings while you’re sent down the greased slide to the bottom of the rankings where you hope you can climb your way back up to a respectable ranking position and into contention once again. Doubt me if you want to but when our match is over and my hand is raised in victory you’ll become a believer in me.

PRIOR HISTORY DOESN’T ENSURE A VICTORY

Bea:  I know what you’re thinking Seleana. You think because you defeated me twice that you can do it again. Yeah a lot of wrestlers have tried to use that logic and it failed them. Not sure why you think it will not fail you when it failed all the other wrestlers who tried to manipulate how fate works. You’re welcome to take me lightly if you want. You’re welcome to be over-confident and lose the match if you want. You’re welcome to take a dive down the ladder of disgrace while I gracefully climb the ladder of success and rise up in the rankings. Just be sure you go into this match believing you’ll be the loser because I’m coming into our match knowing I’m going to be the winner.

Bea snaps her fingers in front of the camera.

SAME AS OTHER WRESTLERS BUT DIFFERENT

Bea:  Did you hear that SNAP Seleana? That was the snap of my fingers toward the camera to snap you out of your fantasy world. However during our match when you hear snaps it will likely be your fingers breaking, or me pulling a maneuver or hold on you that might snap your arm or leg. No I’m not coming into our match to hurt you but if you take the match to that level I’ll not hesitate to inflict major damage. With that out of the way there’s something else I want to say. I want you to understand where I’m coming from compared to the majority of wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling. I get disrespected all the time by the other wrestlers but I know that’s a result of them being jealous of me. They know I’m improving in my wrestling while they are declining in their wrestling. They know they cannot take me on and defeat me. So their only means of attack is to try to discredit me to attempt to take away the negative attention they’re getting from the fans and other wrestlers. You all can be like that if you want because I understand jealousy is an evil task master and if you want to be under control of jealousy I can’t talk you out of it. Nice to know I have so many jealous followers.

Bea gives a stern look into the camera.

Bea:  Here’s an example of what other wrestlers do to try to discredit me. They don’t like the fact that I deliver facts, truth, and honesty, while they spew forth false information, lies, and bullshit. Want to know something? I don’t normally get in front of the camera and talk about basic shit that happens in my life. I don’t talk to people and try to get them to know who my extended family consists of. All I need to tell people is that Bill Barnhart is my husband and Iris is our English Bulldog and we live in Lawrenceville, Georgia. If I wasted half my air time talking nonsense then that makes me a nonsense person. I am now, and will always be, a no-nonsense person. Yes, occasionally, I’ll take the viewers back to a time when I had to deal with a situation that is similar to the one I’m getting from my current opponent. However when I do that it isn’t done to bore you to tears with nonsense information like the majority of wrestlers do. My intent is to show everyone how I dealt with a difficult situation back then and how dealing with that situation allows me to deal with the current match at hand. Now if the style of my presentation doesn’t meet your so-called way of doing things then you can f*** the hell off, shut your damn mouth, then turn around and walk away, keeping silent as you walk away.

Bea informs the camera person that she will make her final comments then they can cut their camera feed.

Bea:  Seleana you can come into our match with a huge attitude, tons of arrogance, and a smart mouth, but when I soundly defeat you in our match you will leave the ring with no attitude, no arrogance, and a bloody mouth. I’m not taking crap from anyone again and you’ll be the recipient of my not taking crap any longer. You need to remember that your past experience against a wrestler is not a guarantee of a victory. See you at Violent Conduct VII.

After Bea has delivered her final comments the camera person cuts their camera feed and our screen goes dark.

125

Climax Control Archives / MAL WHAT? MAL WHO?

« on: August 27, 2021, 09:29:06 AM »

MAL WHAT? MAL WHO?

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart is fired up going into the semi-final round of the Internet Championship Tournament. This time he faces Malachi O’Connell and Bill is predicting a quick and easy victory.

The scene changes and we get a shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart relaxing in the venue where the World’s Fair was held in 1962. Bill and Bea are sitting at a table that has a large umbrella to cast shade and both are eating a nice lunch while they watch people walking through the venue. When the camera person informs the two they are live broadcasting they are about to start start their comments when Bill’s cell phone rings.

Bill:  Excuse me for a moment. This is my neighbor, Andrew, in Lawrenceville, Georgia. Andrew I don’t have much time to talk as I’m just starting my comments on my upcoming match against Malachi in the Internet Championship Tournament, so we need to make this call short. How are you and Rebecca doing in Lawrenceville, Georgia?

Andrew:  We’re fine bur the weather is hot and humid and it has been raining off and on for two weeks. Where are you now?

Bill:  We’re in Seattle, Washington. Sin City Wrestling’s Climax Control 310 is being held here. The weather is nice considering we are in Seattle. Right now we’re relaxing at the venue where the World’s Fair was held in 1962.

Andrew:  Seriously! I was at the World’s Fair in Seattle in 1962 when I was 8 years old. I remember a lot of the exhibits and rides from back then. Enjoy your stay in Seattle and I wish you the best of luck in your match against Malachi.

Bill:  Watch the event so you can see me make easy work of Malachi. Sorry to rush off but I have a certain amount of air time and I have to use it wisely so I don’t come up short.

Bill and Andrew end their call. Bill and Bea eat more of their food before presenting comments for Bill’s match against Malachi.

Bill:  Thanks for tuning in for my comments concerning my match against Malachi at Climax Control 310. This is a semi-final round match to see which of us advances to the final match to determine who becomes the next Sin City Wrestling Internet Champion. We all know I’m gonna win it all and walk away as the Internet Champion so my match against Malachi is going to be a squash with me doing the squashing and him being the one squashed. Before I go further with my comments on my upcoming match I want Bea to comment on her match against Roxi Johnson last week and on my upcoming match at Climax Control 310 against Malachi.

Bea:  As Bill’s Manager I’ll be in his corner to ensure there’s no interference or other crap coming from the side of Malachi O’Connell. If you need to come into this match against Bill and cheat, or have interference, then don’t even show up. With that out of the way let me comment on my match against Roxi Johnson at Climax Control 309. Roxi you and everyone else saw that I held my own in our match. I immediately took advantage of you and had you backpedaling and looking for an escape. In the end you managed to set off your four confetti cannons before I could and you legally won the match. I thank you for the opportunity to face you, a very accomplished superstar, and I applaud you on your win. That match means a lot to me and in every match I improve.

Bill:  You shouldn’t feel bad losing to a great wrestler like Roxi. Your time will come when you win the major championships in Sin City Wrestling. Just watch me as I easily defeat Malachi and move on to the finals in the Internet Championship Tournament. Then at that event I’ll prove everyone wrong when I win the Internet Championship. Bea would you give the comparison between myself and Malachi for the viewers?

Bea:  Gladly. Bill comes into this match at six feet four inches and two hundred forty pounds. Malachi comes into this match at five feet ten inches and one hundred eighty pounds. Malachi you’re giving up six inches in height and sixty pounds of weight to Bill. Sorry to inform you but having those two negatives working against you means you’ll lose to Bill so quickly you won’t even remember losing.

Bill and Bea stop talking for a time to watch some people doing stunts while on bikes, skates, and skateboards. When the people pass by and are off in the distance the two return to the camera.

Bill:  Malachi I need to ask you a question. Now I fully understand that with your limited mental capacity any question, even someone asking you how you are doing today, might cause you a brain melt-down since you’re not capable of processing the data but I’ll try anyway. Have you heard of the term FLAPDOODLE? Oh shit! I think I just used a word that caused your brain to have a melt-down. Sorry, Malachi, but I had to ask because it pertains to you. The term FLAPDOODLE is a slang term meaning NONSENSE which also means WORTHLESS and PATHETIC. Hmmm, nonsense, worthless, and pathetic. Three words that describe you perfectly. While you come into our match like a wet noodle I come into our match like a battering ram on amphetamines. You may think you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread but I’m in this match to fry your bread and send you home as a loser. Think you can stop me from winning our match? Try. Go ahead and try. No matter what you do you’ll fail.

Bea:  Malachi I can predict what you and your family and friends are going to say. They’ll claim the only reason I’m in Bill’s corner for his match is that I’ll try to cheat and interfere in the match to benefit him. I guess you’re blind. I do not interfere in matches. I don’t cause distractions. I don’t hire interference for the benefit of Bill. What I do as his manager is to ensure that his opponents don’t cause distractions, don’t hire interference, and don’t cause problems to get a cheap win for Bill’s opponent. Malachi if anyone associated with you tries that crap nobody is going to hold me and Bill accountable for the damage we inflict upon you.

Bill and Bea take a break from their comments to finish their food and drinks.

Bill:  Oh, Malachi, I see how you tout yourself as the next best thing in the sport of wrestling. Although to most people that sounds great you have to analyze the statement. Saying that you’re the next best thing in wrestling means you admit you’re not the best thing in wrestling at this time. Me, on the other hand, can boldly and honestly state that I’m the best thing in wrestling and I’m going to be the next Sin City Wrestling Internet Champion after I defeat you and then defeat my opponent in the finals of the Internet Championship Tournament.

Bill laughs loudly then continues with his comments.

Bill:  Malachi you’re probably sitting around thinking hard of how you can portray yourself as anything other than a failure. Good luck with that attempt. From what I’ve seen of you it appears that you run trying to claim that you are some sort of malware that is designed to affect how computers and their programs work. You seem to think you in the sport of wrestling work as malware that affects the performance of your opponents. Think again punk. While you may think you are malware designed to make me malfunction in our match the opposite is true. You don’t seem to understand that I am what they call in the IT world as Anti-Malware. Just as with a computer where someone places malware on your computer to make it malfunction so our computers have anti-malware software installed to detect, block, disable, and destroy, the malware from doing the purpose it was intended to do. Yes, Malachi, no matter what you bring to our match, no matter what moves and holds you attempt you will see that I am the anti-malware to your malware. Boom! Zap! You are stopped and no longer in the Internet Championship hunt.

Bill and Bea give a HIGH FIVE then Bill continues with his comments.

Bill:  Malachi you need to remember how you got to this second round of the Internet Championship Tournament. You faced off against one of the biggest jobbers in the sport of wrestling, both in size and the number of matches he’s required to lose, in The Troll. Defeating that obese guy is nothing for you to brag about. If you want to claim your victory over a wrestler who gets paid to lose then you are mentally ill beyond even what I imagined. Yes I recently also defeated The Troll but I did it amazingly and powerfully unlike how weakly you got the win over The Troll. How? I not only beat his fat ass all over the ring I ended the match by picking his lard ass up over my head and pressing him him up and down, like you do with weights, before letting him down and applying my Barnhart Shoulder Breaker Flying Hammer Lock for the submission. I got here by defeating Agostino Romano who is not a jobber and never has been. Agostino is also ten times the wrestler you are. What does that tell you Malachi? It tells you that when you got assigned to this match with me you were assigned your demise. For darn sure having this upcoming event titled the GOING HOME SHOW is perfect as you’re going home as the loser of our match. Har har har!!!

Bea gives the cut sign to the camera person to state their comments for this broadcast is done. The camera person cuts their camera feed and the screen goes dark.

126

Climax Control Archives / THIS IS GOING TO BE A ROCKY MATCH FOR ROXI

« on: August 19, 2021, 09:50:05 AM »

THIS IS GOING TO BE A ROCKY MATCH FOR ROXI

Narrator:  Bea has captured the attention of Management, and the attention of Candy, and Bea has a match against the very accomplished Roxi Johnson at Climax Control 309. It is called a Four Corner Confetti Match and the winner is the first wrestler to set off all four of their confetti cannons. Bea told me she is fired up and excited about facing off against Roxi Johnson. With my opening comments out of the way I turn you over to Bea Barnhart.

PREPARING FOR THE MATCH

The scene changes and we see Bea Barnhart at a gym but we don’t know the location. Bea is inside a wrestling ring sparring with various opponents. After watching her for a few minutes Bea glances over to see the camera person focused on her so she ends her sparring session. Bea exits the ring and stands on the arena floor in front of the ring drying off with a towel while looking into the camera. Bea places a bottle of water on the ring apron.

Bea:  Nice try to get a lot of video of my sparring for my upcoming match with Roxi Johnson but you only got a few minutes. Did Roxi and her friends send you here to spy on me to try to see what special holds and maneuvers I might bring to the match? You got to see a little bit of the end of my sparring session but you didn’t see what I did prior to the camera focusing on me. Wrestlers have to keep some of what we do out of range of prying eyes so there remains the element of surprise when we execute moves and holds, which opponents are not expecting us to execute, during our real match.

Bea picks up the bottle of water, opens it, and drinks a bit of water, before replacing the cap and returning the bottle of water to the ring apron. Bea grabs the towel to wipe off a bit more.

COMPARISON

Bea:  The first thing I wish to present is my comparison of myself and Roxi. I come into this match at five feet five inches and one hundred thirty pounds. I’m a Technical wrestler but I’m able to mix it up if my opponent wants to brawl or go hardcore. Roxi you come into our match at five feet six inches and one hundred thirty-two pounds and you’re listed as a High Flyer who enjoys a fight and often tries to go for the submission. Since you have only one inch of height and two pounds of weight over me I call this match even.

Bea again picks up the bottle of water and takes a drink then returns the bottle of water to the ring apron.

Bea:  The only so-called perceived advantage for you, Roxi, would be the fact that you’ve held Championships numerous times. That’s a good accomplishment and I can’t take away from you the fact that you’ve been a Champion on several occasions. But just because someone has held championships before doesn’t mean they’re going to come into a match against me and win. No way in hell that’s gonna happen! I’m in this match to win and you need to understand that so that you won’t leave the match with a loss and cry about it.

Bea picks up the bottle of water and finishes it off. She returns the cap to the bottle then launches the bottle toward a trash can that is about ten feet away and the bottle lands neatly in the trash can.

Bea:  Roxi we do not have a history of facing off against each other in the wrestling ring. I understand why that is. It is because at the time I started working as a wrestler on the Roster I was a green newbie and you were at the top of the success ladder in Sin City Wrestling. To have a newbie, who hasn’t proven themselves ye, go up against one of the top superstars isn’t something most wrestling federations do. Management gave me matches against other newbies, then they transitioned me into facing middle-card wrestlers, and then they moved me up to give me several Championship qualifier matches and Championship shots. I appreciate all that has been done for me by Bill and his friends training me and for Management seeing my potential. If you think because we don’t have a history in the ring  that means it equates into you having the advantage in our match, or you think I’m intimidated, you’re wrong. In my life, and my wrestling career, I’ve never let anyone intimidate me. Even if you manage to win this match on Sunday I’ll still respect you and your accomplishments but never will I become intimidated. Yes I know you’re a multiple Champion in Sin City Wrestling. Although that might intimidate others I simply see it as another challenge thrown my way and another opportunity for me to prove myself to Management, the other wrestlers on the Roster, and the fans.

FOUR CORNERS CONFETTI MATCH

Bea:  Roxi the official description of our match, as listed on the Climax Control 309 Card, is the first wrestler to set off all four of their confetti cannons wins! With the classification of the match being a Four Corners Confetti Match, and it states “set off all four of their confetti cannons” for the win, I expect each of us will have a cannon set up in each of the four corners. It is a simple matter of out-maneuvering your opponent and setting off your confetti cannons before your opponent does. Now, Roxi, if you’re thinking it might be amusing for you to run into the corners and set my cannons off in an attempt to prevent me from setting off my own cannons I would expect, since my four confetti cannons were deliberately set off by you, that will equate into a win for me since my four confetti cannons were set off before yours were and that is classified as cheating and violating the rules of the match for you to set mine off. So if you were thinking of trying that. . .don’t do it. . .as I don’t want you crying that you handed a win to me. When I win I want it due to my efforts in the ring and not yours. Thanks for stopping by the gym so I could air some comments. I’ll be presenting more comments later from our hotel room at our hotel near the Cross Insurance Arena.

The camera person ends their camera feed and the screen goes dark.

AT THE HOTEL ROOM OF BILL AND BEA BARNHART

RESEARCH

The scene opens and this time we see Bea Barnhart, her husband Bill Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, in their hotel room at a hotel located near the Arena. The camera person motions they are live broadcasting.

Bea:  Roxi we’ve been relaxing in our hotel room watching replays of your many matches. You’re probably wondering why we’re doing that. That’s a good question and I’ll answer it. Although we are physically present at nearly every wrestling event with Sin City Wrestling you can’t observe every moment of every match. That means you need to sit back and watch all the matches you can of the wrestler, or wrestlers, you are facing. That way you can run the match, stop it, and go into slow-motion mode, as you might pick up on something critical to you winning your match.

Bill:  Here’s an example. There used to be a wrestler in a Federation that was headquartered out of the State of Georgia. His signature move, which often led to a win over his opponents, consisted of wearing down his opponent then hitting them in the head with his elbow. I’m not able to give you the name of the wrestler, or what he called this maneuver, as they are not associated with the Federation we’re in. That means I will not mention another Federation’s name or the wrestler’s name. One of the wrestlers who was on the receiving end of this maneuver, and who lost numerous matches to this wrestler and his move, watched hundreds of hours of this wrestler’s matches. What he found out is that in every case. . .did you get that. . .in every case just before this wrestler was about to execute this maneuver, he would lick his lips. Yes you heard me correctly. He would lick his lips then execute the maneuver. After hundreds of hours of watching the wrestler viewing the matches it became clear to him that the wrestler he was observing always licked his lips before executing the maneuver without fail. The next time he was in the ring against this wrestler he was able to see the lip licking thing by his opponent and he rushed him before his opponent could get the elbow move to the head executed. The wrestler involved was shocked that he lost the match and that his opponent was able to counter so he wasn’t able to execute his signature move. Later he found out what happened and he was shocked that he gave away his move with a simple lick of his lips every time. It was something his did without even realizing he was doing it. Why did I tell you this story? I’ll let Bea answer that.

Bea:  Roxi we’ve watched hours and hours of your matches. We’ve run them over and over. Some parts of the matches we did slow-motion to see if we could pick up something like in the story Bill just told. Although we were not able to find something as obvious as the lip licking of the wrestler in the story we were able to pick up on several quirks that, if I see you about to do one of those quirks, I’ll immediately know what comes next and counter it before you can execute it. So, Roxi, I’m sure you want to know if we found certain quirks, motions, where your eyes are looking a certain way or something else that will notify me that a certain move or hold is about to be attempted. Do you honestly think I’m going to tell you what we found so that you can make changes on something you didn’t even know you were doing? Nah! What we found stays with me in my mind and if I see any of the signs during the match I’ll take advantage of you and get the win. Now you can stress out until our match wondering what we found. Have fun with this.

CLOSING COMMENTS

Bea indicates she has a few more items to say as her closing comments. Bea asks the camera person for a zoomed in close-up shot of her face while she comments.

Bea:  Look at this face Roxi. This isn’t the face of a coward. This isn’t the face of someone who steps back from a challenge. This is the face of someone who is confident in what they can do in the wrestling ring. This is the face of someone who has come a long way from her rookie match, which was her first match in Sin City Wrestling, at Climax Control 256 on January 5, 2020. Yes I’ve come a hell of a long way Roxi. I hold my own in the wrestling ring. I accept any type of match Management assigns me to. I never back down from anyone. Maybe you wish to take me lightly and that’s your decision to make. I’m planning on leaving our match with my hand raised in victory which will catapult me to the top of the rankings. Yes, Roxi, I really am that confident of myself!

Bill:  That’s my girl! I’m proud of you Bea. Go into the match and give it all you’ve got and exit the match as the winner.

Bea:  Damn right I will!!!

Bea asks the camera person to end the broadcast and they do and our screen goes dark.

127

Climax Control Archives / A CANDYLAND MATCH? THIS IS GONNA BE FUN!

« on: August 12, 2021, 08:32:56 AM »

A CANDYLAND MATCH? THIS IS GONNA BE FUN!

Narrator:  A Candyland Match? Bill Barnhart against Agostino Romano? Yes you heard correctly. This match is a First Round match for the Internet Championship and the winner moves up in the Tournament to keep winning and get a shot at the Internet Championship. We already know Bill is going to win this Tournament match, and all the others he will be assigned to, and when he faces off for the Internet Championship he will win that match and be crowned the next Sin City Wrestling Internet Championship.

AT THE HOME OF ANDY AND REBECCA EIDE IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

The scene comes into focus as we see Bill and Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, in the backyard of their neighbors Andy and Rebecca Eide.

Bill:  Wow! Your new backyard fence looks great!

Andy:  We had to replace it because someone, or something, came through our yard three weeks ago and broke the gate on the back part of the fence and they also broke the gate leading out of the backyard to go into the front yard of the house. Since the fence was old, most likely it was the original fence from when this housing development was built in 1991, we had to replace it as it was worn down and not worth the time and money to try to repair several portions of it.

Bill:  Who did you get to install your new fence?

Andy:  Our neighbor Edgar does many things and carpentry is one of them. I purchased the fencing material from Home Depot and Edgar and his wife Nellie installed the fence. I’m amazed that in less than five days they had the entire job completed and that included removing the original fence posts which were imbedded in the ground in cement and placing the removed fencing material into the dumpster I rented.

Bill:  If you don’t mind me asking how much was the total cost?

Andy:  First I have to tell you I contacted two fencing companies and one gave me an estimate of $3,500 and the other was around $4,500. I purchased the fencing material at Home Depot for $1,100 and Edgar and Nelly asked for $1,500 for their labor so I saved a lot of money. The best part is they connected everything with screws instead of nails so the fencing should stay in place for a very long time.

Bill:  Do I know Edgar?

Andy:  He lives seven houses down from us. I figured you knew him as you are my neighbor and you must have seen him and Nellie mowing our yard and trimming out trees all the time. You didn’t know his name and that he is our neighbor? I’ll give you his phone number later.

Bill:  Yes I have seen them doing your lawn and trimming your trees and bushes but I never put it together that they were our neighbors. I know that now and I’m going to have my backyard fence replaced by Edgar and Nellie also.

Andy:  Before you go I need to tell you I received an e-mail from Heritage Property Management which is the company that manages our development for Huntington Landing Homeowners Association. They said over the past few weeks our development, and other housing developments near us, submitted reports to Gwinnett Police that they and their neighbors had their cars broken into and valuable items stolen. But since my neighbor on the other side of my house is one of the Officers of Huntington Landing Homeowners Association she gave me valuable information. Those cars reported to have been broken into were not locked at the time the people took items out of their vehicles. If you leave valuable items in your car but don’t lock your car then you’re also to blame. I just hope if anyone tries to get into our vehicles there would be enough movement to cause the car alarms to go off. Since our driveway is below our bedroom windows we would surely hear it and be able to run the criminals off and prevent a theft. On top of that my wife has surveillance devices facing our driveway from two angles so we would also have it on video to give to Gwinnett Police.

Bill:  That what I’m gonna do to Agostino Romano. I’m going to hear him trying to perpetrate a theft to try to win our match but I’ll stop him and run him off before he can make the steal. Remember to send me Edgar’s phone number so I can call him to install a new backyard fence.

Bill, Bea, and Iris, leave Andy and Rebecca’s yard and return to their home. Once they are in their home the cameraman sets up and Bill launches into his comments for his match against Agostino Romano.

AT THE BARNHART HOME IN LAWRENCEVILLE, GEORGIA

Bill:  Thanks for joining me at our home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. We’ll be flying to San Jose in the morning as that is where Climax Control 308 is being held. At that event I face Agostino Romano in an Internet Championship Tournament match, a Candyland Match, and the winner continues in the Tournament and the loser goes off to do something else. Before I launch into my comments for my match I want to give Bea time to comment on her match against Amber Ryan at Climax Control 307.

Bea:  Thanks Bill. For everyone watching, and especially for Amber Ryan, I want you to go back and look at my performance in that match. I admit I didn’t win, and I congratulate Amber for getting the win, but you need to focus on my performance. Why? You see that in every match I get better and stronger. I’m able to hold my own against anyone in Sin City Wrestling. I continue to perform at my best, and continually improve, and I could have easily walked away from my match with the win and a shot at the Bombshell Championship. But I’ll have to wait until my next opportunity arises. Again, Amber, congratulations on giving me a great match and congratulations on your win. And so everyone is informed ahead of time I’ll be at Bill’s match against Agostino Romano at Climax Control 308 as his Manager to ensure no interference happens to steal his win away from him. Thanks for giving me some of your air time to present my comments.

Bill:  Anything for you Bea. . .except for my coffee and chocolate and especially my chocolate coffee. . .ha ha ha. Now for my comments on my upcoming match against Agostino Romano. It is a Candyland Match where the ring will be made up like a playing board of the game Candyland. This should be a very amusing match and I know I’m gonna win.

Bill points to himself on that comment.

Bill:  Agostino Romano. If not for the fact that you occasionally stumble and actually manage to win a match, and you actually obtained a Championship, you’d be a total loser. But I give you credit that you have accomplished a few things but overall you’re as consistent as a pair of loose pants without a belt to hold them up.  But coming into our match you’re giving up seven inches in height and twenty-five pounds of weight to me. I’m damn sure going to use my height and weight advantage to quickly wear you down, bag you up, and throw you in the trash dumpster and I’ll move on in the Internet Championship Tournament while you return home and lick your wounds.

Barnhart stands up and makes a motion around his waist to show that without a belt to hold up your pants they will slip down to your feet.

Bill:  Agostino we have an amusing match. . .well it’ll be amusing for me but terrifying for you…and it is called a Candyland Match where the ring is made up in the design of a Candyland game board. When I saw what type of match we’re having, and that it was called a Candyland Match, I couldn’t help but look at your pathetic performance in the ring and figure with you involved in this match they could have easily have called this match a CANDY ASS match. Just so nobody takes that comment the wrong way I looked up the term CANDY ASS and the definitions came out as TIMID, SCARED, WEAK, and COWARDLY. Those are perfect descriptions of you Agostino.

Bill busts out in loud laughter before containing himself to continue with his comments.

Bill:  Agostino we’ve had only one match against each other but before you try to brag about what you did in that match please allow me to tell the viewers the truth. The match was at Climax Control 289, on January 10, 2021, and it was a Fatal Four Way where the winner was the wrestler who could slam someone through a table. Do you remember who got slammed through the table for the loss? Was it me? Was it Lincoln Daniels? Was it the other wrestler in that match? Hell no! It was YOU, Agostino, who got slammed through the table by Lincoln Daniels for the loss. Now that the truth is out in the open please do all you can to try to make out the facts of that match to be untrue. Go ahead. . .I dare you!

Bill again busts out in loud laughter but it takes him longer to recover from his laughing and return to commenting.

SOUL MAN. . .BILL MAN. . .

Bill:  I’m going to transition into what I classify as the entertainment, amusement, and informative portion of my comments. First I’ll play for you a well-known song by Sam & Dave titled SOUL MAN. Once you’ve heard the original I’ll give you my version of that song.

Bill clicks on the song, SOUL MAN, on the YouTube page and the original SOUL MAN by Same & Dave begins to play as the lyrics scroll on the screen for the viewers to see.

Comin' to you on a dusty road
Good lovin', I got a truck load
And when ya get it, huh, ya got some
So don't worry, 'cause I'm comin'

I'm a soul man, wow
I'm a soul man
I'm a soul man, woah, heh
I'm a soul man
And that ain't all, huh

Got what I got the hard way
And I'll make it better each and every day
So honey, don't you fret, huh
'Cause you ain't seen uh, nothin' yet

I'm a soul man, oh road
I'm a soul man, play it Steve
I'm a soul man, ha
I'm a soul man, oh

I was brought up on a side street, yes maam
I learned how to love before I could eat
I was educated from good stock
When I start lovin', oh I can't stop

I'm a soul man
I'm a soul man
I'm a soul man, yeah
I'm a soul man, look

Grab a rope and I'll pull you in
Give you hope and be your only boyfriend
Yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah), uh

I'm talking about a
Soul man, I'm a
Soul man, and you
Soul man, aah
Soul man, hold on
Soul man, I'm a
Soul man, and you a
Soul man, and you're a
Soul man, hold on

The original version of SOUL MAN by Sam & Dave ends and Bill comments before presenting his version of the song.

Bill:  You’ve just heard the original SOUL MAN by Sam & Dave and now I present to you my version, which I’ll sing for you, titled BILL MAN.

Coming at you like I’m Dusty Rhodes
Good wrestling. . .I got a truck load
And when you get it, huh, you’re gonna get it
So don't worry, 'cause I'm comin'

I'm the Bill Man. . .wow
I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man. . .woah. . . heh
I'm the Bill Man
And that ain't all. . .huh

Got what I got the hard way
And I make it better each and every day
So y’all, don't you fret. . .huh
'Cause you ain't seen. . .nothin' yet

I'm the Bill Man. . .oh
I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man. . .ha
I'm the Bill Man. . .oh

I was brought up in the wrestling ring
I learned to wrestle before I could sing
I was educated from good stock
When I start wrestling. . .oh I can't stop

I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man
I'm the Bill Man. . .yeah
I'm the Bill Man. . .look

Grab a rope and I'll pull you in
Give you hope but I’ll get the win
Yeah. . .yeah. . .yeah. . .yeah. . .uh

I'm talking about a Bill Man. . .
I'm a Bill Man. . .
And you. . .ahhh
You’re not a Bill man. . .ahhh
Bill Man. . .hold on
Bill Man. . .
I'm a Bill Man. . .
You’re not a Bill Man
I'm a Bill Man. . .
You’re not a Bill Man
I’m a Bill Man. . .
You’re not a Bill Man. . .
Hold on!!!

Bill’s version of SOUL MAN titled BILL MAN ends and Bill returns to his comments.

THIS IS HOW IT’S GONNA BE

Bill:  Thanks for enjoying my version of SOUL MAN that I titled BILL MAN. Listen up Agostino. I’m warning you ahead of time what’s gonna happen to you in our match so that way you can’t use the lame excuse that you didn’t know ahead of time. It’s gonna be like this Romano. I’m gonna win. But I’m not just gonna win. I’m gonna hurt you in the process. I’m walking away from our match with a victory to win this first round of the Internet Championship Tournament and you’ll return to your dressing room a defeated pathetic worthless excuse of a wrestler. I know you’ll try to brag about being a two-time Internet Champion but let me set the record straight so the viewers know the truth. Yes you won the Internet Championship on January 31, 2020, then again on March 28, 2021. I give you a little bit of credit for your accomplishment but if you think those two reigns, one for a decent amount of time and one for a short period of time, are something to brag about then you’re more out of your mind than I thought you were. Enjoy living in the past, Romano, because there will be no Internet Championship in your future. See you on Sunday, August 15, 2021, at the Provident Credit Union Event Center in San Jose.

Bill gives the CUT sign and the camera person turns off their camera and the scene ends.

128

Climax Control Archives / I'M GOING TO EARN A SHOT AT THE BOMBSHELL CHAMPIONSHIP

« on: August 04, 2021, 01:01:30 PM »

I’M GOING TO EARN A SHOT AT THE BOMSHELL CHAMPIONSHIP

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart is fired up for her next match at Climax Control 307 against Amber Ryan the current Bombshell Champion. Bea not only goes into this match high on being given the opportunity to defeat Amber and earn a shot at the Bombshell Championship but she has added anger and energy after being called a sexist slur by The Troll during his match with her husband, Bill Barnhart, at Climax Control 306. With my opening comments out of the way I turn you over to Bill and Bea Barnhart but I have no clue where they are at this point in time.

TAKING CARE OF JERKS

When the scene switches we see Bill and Bea Barnhart at the Waterbar Restaurant at 399 The Embarcadero in San Francisco, California. They are sitting in the dining area which is outside the restaurant along the sidewalk.

Bea:  I’m still shocked that The Troll had to resort to landing a low blow on you during your match last week. Then the jerk decided to go off on me because I was calling him out for cheating and letting the Referee know to keep a close watch on him.

Bill:  Yeah the low blows are never nice to be on the receiving end but I’m okay. But I’m not okay with that fat piece of crap, The Troll, screaming out calling you a c*nt. That’s why I ended the match with my favorite submission hold, my Barnhart Shoulder Breaker Flying Hammer Lock. I wanted fat boy to hurt for a long time for what he did to me and for what he called you.

Bill and Bea have their conversation interrupted by a smart ass woman who walks down the sidewalk blasting loud obnoxious music on her cell phone. That wasn’t bad enough but the woman stops and is standing near the outside dining area of the Waterbar Restaurant and her music is so loud and annoying Bill and Bea are unable to hold a conversation.

Bea:  Excuse me! EXCUSE ME!!! EXCUSE ME!!!!! Do you mind either turning down the volume of your music or moving away from our dining area as your music is so loud we cannot hear each other talk.

Obnoxious Woman:  Shut up bitch! This is my music, this is a public street, and I’ll do whatever the hell I want!

Bea:  First The Troll calls me a c*unt and now I’m being called a bitch by an obnoxious bitch of a woman? Damn! Look I’m again asking you nicely to please turn down your music or move away from our location so we can have a peaceful meal and hold a conversation.

Obnoxious Woman:  Who the hell do you think you are?

Bea:  I’m Bea Barnhart, one of the Superstar Wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling and we are performing on Sunday at the Kezar Pavilion here in San Francisco. I suggest you back off because if you come at me and threaten physical violence on me I’ll shove your cell phone so far up your ass the surgeons in the Emergency Room will have a difficult time finding where it is to remove it. What’s it gonna be?

Obnoxious Woman:  Oooooo, the pretty little Asian girl thinks she can take out a woman from San Francisco? Come on bitch c*nt bring it on!

Bea hears the c*nt word and she again gets upset as she did when The Troll used that word on her. Quickly an altercation ensues between the obnoxious woman and Bea and the obnoxious woman challenges Bea to go into the alley to fight it out. We see Bill with a huge smile on his face as he knows what will happen if that obnoxious woman is stupid enough to go into the alley against Bea.

Bea:  Oh, well, I warned you not to do this but you want to do this so let’s do this!

The two women enter the alley and we hear yelling from both of them but the yelling from the obnoxious woman stops quickly. Everyone on the sidewalk, and at the outside dining area of the Waterbar Restaurant, wonder what happened. Then they see movement and they see Bea calmly stroll out of the alley and there is no more comments from the obnoxious woman and her music stopped playing and the other woman is nowhere to be seen.

Bill:  That went quickly. What happened?

Bea:  You saw that I politely asked the woman to turn off her music or move away from us and she threatened me and demanded I go into the alley to fight her. I did exactly what I told her I would do and that was to either shut off her music on her cell phone or shove her cell phone up her ass. Guess which one I decided to do.

Bill:  Shove her cell phone up her ass?

Bea:  Yep. And I even called an ambulance to have her taken to the hospital to have her cell phone surgically removed. Just like I shut this obnoxious woman up you’ll see me shut up Amber Ryan this Sunday.

>* sound of ambulance sirens * An ambulance pulls up to the restaurant and Bea directs them into the alley where the woman with her cell phone up her ass is located. A short time later the Paramedics bring the woman out of the alley on a gurney and load her into the ambulance and drive off. People on the street and other diners at the restaurant cheer Bea for properly defending herself. Bea returns to their table in the outside dining area and Bill and Bea continue with their meal.

Bill:  This location brings back memories of when I grew up and lived in Oakland. The Embarcadero is the first San Francisco station on the BART rapid transit from the East Bay area. The Embarcadero is a great shopping and dining area. Look up there Bea and you see we’re nearly underneath the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge. When you look across San Francisco Bay you see my original home town of Oakland. Let’s enjoy our meal now that we can eat without a lot of noise disturbing us.

Bea:  I’m looking forward to seeing where you grew up in Oakland when we visit there tomorrow.

The scene in San Francisco goes off the screen and the screen goes dark.

THE NEXT DAY IN OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA

Bill and Bea are seen in front of a small house on a small street in Oakland. Bill is pointing to this house.

Bill:  Bea this is the house where I was born and lived until I was nine years old then we moved to a much larger home in the Oakland hills. This house at 4022 Fullington Street is very small. Although the website Zillow lists the house at around 1,400 square feet I can tell you it is not that large. I would estimate they should legally classify this house at around 1,000 square feet. We liked living here, but when the home at 4263 Saint Andrews Road in Oakland became available my father purchased that home and I lived there until I graduated from Skyline High School. I’ll take you there for a look and explain the house to you.

The two drive off in their rental car and arrive at 4263 Saint Andrews Road in Oakland, California, located near the Sequoya Country Club Golf Course.

Bill:  Here we are at 4263 Saint Andrews Road in Oakland where I lived from nine years of age until I turned eighteen and graduated from Skyline High School. Bea although the website Zillow lists this house at 1,700 square feet I assure you this house is nearly 2,000 square feet, has about a one back yard, and it has a full basement with a wet bar also. When we purchased this home it had around twenty fruit trees in the back yard consisting of apricots, peaches, plums, cherries, apples, pears, nectarines, and some others. I felt bad that after I moved out of the house my father became ill and mother decided to sell the home. But the fact that my hard-working parents went from a very small humble home to this one shows that anyone can achieve their dreams.

Bea:  I’m glad you brought me here Bill and I’m glad you explained that anyone can come from a humble beginning and end up on top of the world. That’s how I see my wrestling career and how I see my match on Sunday against Amber Ryan. Even though our match is a non-Title match when I defeat Amber I automatically become next in line for a shot at the Bombshell Championship. Whether she will still have possession of it when I have my Championship match is yet to be seen but regardless who holds the Championship when I challenge for it I'll become the next Bombshell Champion. That’s a true humble beginning to a fantastic here in the present situation for me and my wrestling career.

The two drive off and the scene ends.

IN SAN FRANCISCO AT THEIR HOTEL

The scene comes on our screen and we get a shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart at their hotel room which is located near to Kezar Pavilion. The two look into the camera to make comments.

Bill:  This is your air time Bea. Your time to shine. Your time to tell Amber Ryan what she got herself into having this match with you this Sunday.

Bea:  Thanks Bill. Amber I have several things to get out in the open so just sit down and pay attention. I’d like to start with a comment I heard recently It goes: IT IS FOOLISH TO ADD YEARS TO YOUR LIFE IF YOU DON’T ADD LIFE TO YOUR YEARS. Amber I know you’re looking dumbfounded right now and due to your low mentality you’re having a problem processing the information. Therefore let me enlighten you. You seem to be one of those wrestlers who wants to add years to your life but you you are so lame that you don’t have fun enjoying life. Yeah, okay, you have the Bombshell Championship but you don’t seem to be happy about that or take it seriously. On the other hand I’m thankful that I’ve added tons of experience, “life” if you want to call it that, to my wrestling career. If you’re going to be successful in the sport of wrestling then you should be happy when you achieve things. You never seem to be happy about anything Amber. You always come across as if you just ate a dozen sour lemons. That’s a pathetic way to live your life but you have to choose what you do in your life and your choices are not ones that I would make.

Bea take a sip of water.

Bea:  I have another saying I wish to present to you Amber. It goes like this. DON’T HATE SOMETHING YOU LIKE JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE YOU HAVE ALSO LIKES THAT SAME THING. Again, due to your limited mental capacity, I’ll try to explain this saying in simple terms so that you’ll be able to understand. I have a friend who constantly tells me the reason they hate a certain type of music, or a certain musical group, or certain type of food, etc., that they hate a person who also likes those items. Now wait a minute! They loved those items until she found out someone they know, but doesn’t like, also likes the same things. I’ll never back down and stop liking something just because someone I don’t like also likes what I like. Nobody should just blindly hate something just because someone else also likes it. You need to stand up for what you believe in whether it is music, movies, cars, clothing, or food items. You see, Amber, that’s the difference between me and you. I cherish everything and I work hard to accomplish my goals. If someone I know, whether in personal life or inside the wrestling business, likes the same things I do, but I don’t like that person, it would be stupid for me to start hating those things just because someone I don’t like also likes them. To try to put that in the simplest terms it comes down to the fact that I don’t choose to like or dislike something just because others who I don’t like also like or dislike those items. In my personal life, and my wrestling career, I’m going to do  what I need to do to be successful. When I defeat you on Sunday, even though it is a non-Title match, the fact that I defeated you means I go to the top of the ladder to challenge for the Bombshell Championship. That’s a goal I set my eyes on and that’s the goal I’ll achieve this Sunday.

DON’T TAKE ME LIGHTLY

Bea:  Here’s the bottom line Amber. Since I arrived in Sin City Wrestling we have not had a match against each other. This is our first match to face each other and I know your ego is telling you that you’ll achieve an easy win over me. Oh, please, don’t be that foolish! Just because you have not yet faced me in the ring doesn’t mean you know everything about me and it doesn’t mean you are more talented than I am. When you step into the ring Sunday evening you step into the ring as the Bombshell Champion and we are basically even in height and weight. When the match is over and my hand is raised in victory over you of course you will still be the Bombshell Champion but you’ll have to face your loss to me. Don’t take me lightly.

The broadcast ends with that last comment by Bea and the screen goes black.

129

Climax Control Archives / I'M GOING TO SHRED THE TROLL

« on: July 28, 2021, 10:24:11 AM »

I’M GOING TO SHRED THE TROLL

Narrator:  The Troll? Bill Barnhart has to face The Troll to open Climax Control 305? Seriously? Ha ha ha ha ha! This is going to be one of the quickest wins for Bill Barnhart in his wrestling career.

VISITING A FRIEND IN SAN DIEGO

The scene shifts to a home where we see Bill and Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, relaxing at the home of Bill’s friend Marcus who lives in Imperial Beach, California, which is just South of San Diego along the border with Mexico and about 150 miles South of Los Angeles. We listen in on their conversation.

Bill:  Marcus I thank you for inviting us to San Diego when you heard we were going to have one of our wrestling events in Los Angeles. I have two tickets for you and a friend to come watch me wrestle at Climax Control 306 which will be on August 1, 2021.

Marcus:  Thanks Bill. I’ve been watching you and Bea wrestle and I’m hoping both of you earn another Championship soon. I see Bea earning the Bombshell Roulette Championship and I hope to see you get into the mix for the vacated Internet Championship.

Bill:  Whatever comes our way Marcus. Also I’m glad that Iris is getting along with your dog Jake. The two are having fun playing in the backyard.

Marcus:  Jake loves everyone but I know Iris loves food first before other things. By the way have you been assigned an opponent for Climax Control 306?

Bill:  Yeah they assigned me to face off against the company Jobber. That term means the person gets paid to lose. Damn shame since I’ve spent my entire career facing the toughest opponents as I don’t want a win handed to me but I have to accept my assignment.

Marcus:  The Troll? Seriously? What’s up with that guy?

Bill:  I would equate him as a cross between Patrick Star, Michael Moore, and Jabba The Hutt. He’s a fat slob at five feet eight inches and two hundred fifty-two pounds and his face looks like Michael Moore and makes you want to puke.

Marcus:  Sounds like the guy got some defective genes from his parents. I know you’re originally from Oakland, California, as we went to school together there, and now you’re in Atlanta, Georgia, but where is this guy The Troll from?

Bill:  I guess he doesn’t want anyone to know where he lives because his information sheet filed with the Federation just says “Parts Unknown most likely his Mother’s basement.”

Bill and Marcus bust out in loud laughter over that information and Bea walks into the room to find out what these two find so amusing.

Bea: What’s so amusing guys?

Bill:  My opponent, The Troll, for Climax Control 306.

Bea:  Yes he’s quite an amusing, and downright pathetic, wrestler. Speaking of being amusing can I tell you two a few jokes before I leave you two alone?

Bill and Marcus say they want to hear Bea’s jokes.

Bea:  What do you call it when two Doctors are performing surgery on the same patient at the same time? Co-operating.

What do you call a blood-sucking insect that is made out of wood?  A Mesquite-O

What would you call a man who has a fake penis made out of a tree?  Woodpecker

Bill and Marcus enjoy the jokes and laugh. Bea goes into the backyard to play with Iris and Jake. The camera remains on Marcus and Bill for a short time before the camera feed is cut and the screen goes black.

SOME TIME LATER IN LOS ANGELES

SHREDDER

We open with a scene of Bill and Bea Barnhart, and their English Bulldog Iris, in their hotel room at a hotel near the Galen Center in Los Angeles, California. We see Bill sitting at the dining table with a pile of papers on the table and a document shredder on the floor in front of him. Bea walks up and sees the paper and the shredder.

Bea:  Did you bring paperwork and our shredder from Lawrenceville, Georgia, to Los Angeles? Why?

Bill:  We haven’t been able to travel much until now so I decided to catch up on shredding documents.

Bea:  You could have waited until we got home for a decent amount of time but I guess because we launched into the West Coast Tour better to bring the paperwork with us to shred. By the way what documents are you shredding?

Bill:  I’m shredding documents that o longer serve a purpose and they are now useless. To use an analogy I’ll be shredding The Troll in my match at Climax Control 306 as he also serves no purpose and is useless.

Bea:  Since I’m in your corner as your Manager, and there’s rumors going around that Bobbie Dahl might run in on the match to mess with The Troll, I’m in your corner to make sure no interference happens. If Bobbie does manage to distract The Troll and he loses the match the Referee is likely to blame us when we’re innocent of any wrong doing. Rest assured Bobbie and The Troll are not going to get away with cheating you out of a win. Before I go take care of some things I want to make it clear to everyone watching that my performance in the Ultimate X Over The Pool match at Summer XXXTreme IX was great and even though I didn’t win I’ll be back after the Roulette Championship soon. I’ll have no mercy for any wrestlers standing in my way. You have been warned.

Bea walks off to take care of stuff and Bill starts shredding documents. The sound of the shredder cutting up the papers is soothing.

Bill:  Hey, Troll, this is what I’m going to do to you at our match at Climax Control 306. I’m the shredder and you’re this fat pile of now useless papers. I’m not taking you seriously as you’re the joke of the year. I’ll flatten your fat ass so quickly you’ll lose twenty pounds in the process. Remember I’m a street smart person who was born and grew up in Oakland, California, and then in 2012 me and Bea moved to the Atlanta Metro area in Georgia. So I transitioned from an ass kicking street smart kid from Oakland to an ass kicking street smart redneck guy from Atlanta, Georgia.

Bea:  But an intelligent cute and handsome street smart redneck buy from Atlanta.

Bill and Bea enjoy a laugh over that comment.

Bill:  Everyone will watch me work my magic this Sunday. Everyone will watch me quickly destroy The Blob this Sunday. Enjoy your free time now Troll because after I get done beating you down you’ll be so busy dressing your wounds and taking heavy medication for your pain that you will not enjoy your time.

Bill motions to the camera person to cut the camera feed and they do and our screen goes black.

130

Supercard Archives / Re: FENRIS/BROTHER DAVID v SENOR VINNIE/BULLDOG BILL BARNHART

« on: July 13, 2021, 10:24:25 AM »

WE ARE THE TEAM TO BEAT

Narrator:  I spoke with Bill Barnhart before coming on camera to present my narrator comments to lead into Bill’s comments on his upcoming match and I know you will enjoy his presentation.

The scene changes and we get a shot of Bill Barnhart somewhere on the Sun Princess cruise ship. We are not sure his exact location but we can tell he is walking along the decks on the outside area of the ship. Bill looks over at the camera and comments while he is walking.

LIKE ONE AND HATE THE OTHER

Bill:  Thanks for joining me for my presentation of comments leading up to my Tag Team match with my friend and tag team partner Senor Vinnie. We’re facing off against Fenris and Brother David and I have to tell you that even though I have the utmost respect for Fenris I want to go off on Brother David and destroy him. To give you a comparison of how I feel about Brother David and my desire to kick his ass when I see him let me tell you how my English Bulldog Iris is. We have numerous dogs in our neighborhood. The dogs I enjoy interacting with are the Pit Bulls named Jelly and Sapphire, and the Husky dogs named Aries and Nairobi. Then we have a Chihuahua named Lucky and a Boxer-Pit Bull mix named Milo. Although all the dogs are nice Iris is only calm and nice to Lucky the Chihuahua and Milo the Boxer-Pit Bull mix. When she meets the other dogs she goes off on them and acts like she wants to rip their fur off even though they are nice dogs. So that’s how I feel about Brother David and Fenris. Whereas I want to go off on David and rip his skin off  every time I see him I calmly walk up to Fenris and greet him. This aggression toward Brother David will be a key factor in our win over their tag team.

Bill continues to walk the decks while discussing his upcoming match.

YOU CANNOT BE GIVEN A TALENT YOU DON’T ALREADY POSSESS

Bill:  For your viewing enjoyment, and for the purpose of presenting information and concepts to you, I have two videos I’ll have the Network show you. The first video is a parody video I had created to show how pathetic the team of Brother David and Fenris is and the second video is an interaction I had with Iris recently. I ask the Network to run the parody video at this time.

The parody video runs and we see two familiar figures standing at the landing dock on an island. One of the figures is Mister Roarke, who is the owner of Fantasy Island, and the other figure is his personal assistant Tattoo. We hear a sea plane approaching and we hear a familiar cry from Tattoo.

Tattoo:  Boss! Boss! Da plane! Da plane!

Mister Roarke and Tattoo watch the plane land on the water then it maneuvers to the dock where several passengers debark onto the pier. The last two out of the plane are actors who were hired to portray themselves as Fenris and Brother David. Mister Roarke approaches them and they get into a conversation.

Mister Roarke:  Ah you two must be the. . .persons. . .who are involved in the wrestling match against Bill Barnhart and Senor Vinnie at Summer XXXTreme IX. I can’t mention their names due to issues of using someone’s name without their permission but with the description I gave the viewers they know who you are supposed to be portraying. You are aware that here on Fantasy Island myself and Tattoo and our staff try to help people understand what they are capable of, and what they are unable to accomplish, but we work hard to help them out and make their fantasy become a reality but we are unable to give them something they don’t already possess. Please tell us what you think we at Fantasy Island can do for you on this trip.

Person Portraying Brother David:  We want you to grant our fantasy that me and my tag team partner will work well together and easily defeat Senor Vinnie and Bill Barnhart.

Person Portraying Fenris:  Yes what he just said except the part about you granting me the abilities to defeat Vinnie and Bill as I already possess those abilities. I just want to get along with this tag team partner I was assigned to.

Tattoo gives a shocked look at Mister Roarke and Mister Roarke knows what Tattoo is thinking.

Mister Roarke:  What? Here at Fantasy Island we cannot grant wishes or a fantasy by giving you something you don’t already possess. As for you (looking at the person made up to look like Fenris) you already have the abilities to defeat anyone in Sin City Wrestling but I’m unable to grant you the ability to work nicely with Brother David as that is not something you already possess. As for you (looking at the person made up to look like Brother David) you come here with no abilities, no knowledge how to work with others including your family members, and straight up you suck. Therefore I demand you two get off Fantasy Island and return the mainland as there’s no way I can help you obtain the impossible. Leave my island now!

As the actors made up to portray these two characters launch into a loud and threatening complaint Security personnel arrive on the dock and drag them into the plane to take them back to the mainland. Once the plane takes off Tattoo and Mister Roark look at each other and sigh.

Tattoo:  Hey, Boss, everyone who wants to come to Fantasy Island is handed a legal form that sets forth what we can, and cannot, do here at Fantasy Island. Why do guests continue to come here demanding we violate the legal agreement and demand we give them talents and abilities they don’t already possess?

Mister Roarke  Because humans are stupid. Let’s go the house and have a few drinks. We both need some stiff drinks after dealing with those two losers.

As Mister Roarke and Tattoo walk toward the house the scene ends and we are returned to Bill Barnhart on the Sun Princess cruise ship.

Bill:  Har har har!!! That was hilarious! Nothing like having tag team opponents where one member is an outstanding wrestler and the other is a bumbling worthless drag chute on the talented member of their team. You know what they say that oil and water don’t mix and that’s exactly how you need to look at the team of Brother David and Fenris. Now I’ll have the Network show a video of an interaction between myself and Iris recently while at our home in Lawrenceville, Georgia. This will show you how talented and intelligent Iris is. Please run the Iris video at this time.

IRIS IS SMARTER THAN SHE LOOKS

The video of the interaction of Bill with Iris plays.

Bill:  Okay, Iris, now is the time for you to show the world how smart you are. Iris please tell the viewers what the outside of a tree is called.

Iris:  Bark!

Bill:  Correct! If Fenris and Brother David think they can defeat me and Senor Vinnie they’re barking up the wrong tree. Now, Iris, could you please tell the viewers what the top of a house is called?

Iris:  Roof!

Bill:  You’re correct again Iris! I’m here to let the viewers know that the outstanding performance myself and Senor Vinnie will present will be so amazing we’ll blow the roof off the venue. Iris are you ready for your last question? What’s the consistency of sandpaper?

Iris:  Ruff!

Bill:  Great job Iris! You got all three questions correct! Yes the consistency of sandpaper is rough and me and Vinnie will be so rough on David and Fenris the two of them are likely to retire from wrestling because they will be so humiliated by their loss to us.

The video of the interaction between Bill and Iris is done and we return to Bill who is walking around on the cruise ship.

Bill:  Here’s what I see going on with you two. Fenris I see you hoping that I have such a hatred for David that my focus on beating the crap out of him will take my attention off you. Yeah wouldn’t you love that to be the case eh? Hate to burst your bubble Fenris but I’m not one to distract myself away from one opponent by being overly focused on my other opponent. And what are you thinking David? Are you thinking that my respect and admiration for Fenris will cause me to back off on your and not go hard on you? Think again as I’m not backing off you no matter how much you wish for it. Come to think of it I don’t have to do much in this match to overcome you two. With Fenris being a highly competitive, talented, and accomplished wrestler, and you being a piece of shit dirt bag of a wrestler, all me and Vinnie need to do is stand back and watch you two attack each other and self-destruct. See you two shortly in the ring. Damn sure hope you two have your medical insurance paid and up-to-date as you are going to need it when me and Vinnie get done with  you.

Bill gives the CUT sign to the camera person who then calls into the Network to inform them that they are cutting their camera feed. A few seconds later the feed is cut and the screen goes black.

131

Supercard Archives / Re: KRYSTAL WOLFE v MAKI v BEA BARNHART - ULTIMATE X ROULETTE TITLE

« on: July 13, 2021, 10:21:09 AM »

KRYSTAL AND MAKI ARE GOING TO BE X’D OUT IN OUR ULTIMATE X OVER THE POOL MATCH

Narrator:  Bea Barnhart is on a roll and she continues to make references to how pathetic her opponents in the Ultimate X Over The Pool match for the Bombshell Roulette Championship are and how easily she will defeat them. I now turn you over to Bea Barnhart who will lay it out for you.

The scene shifts to Bea Barnhart, who is in her trademark wrestling attire, standing in front of a graphic of the setup for an Ultimate X Over The Pool match. This is a trademark match of Sin City Wrestling for their Summer XXXTreme Super Show for Roulette Championship matches. We are not sure where Bea is located but it appears to be a small broadcast studio or a small conference room on the Sun Princess cruise ship. Bea looks into the camera with a stern look as she launches into her comments for today.

PRIOR HISTORY BETWEEN US DOESN’T EQUATE INTO A VICTORY FOR YOU

Bea:  I wish to run down, for those of you who are uninformed or just damn stupid, what my history in the wrestling ring is with Krystal Wolfe and Maki. I start with Maki. We had a match at Climax Control 275 on July 19, 2020, and you defeated me by pinfall. Now, Maki, before you puff out your chest, beat your chest with your fists, utter grunting noises, and start bragging, I need to remind you I was very new to the sport of wrestling at the time we had our match. If you think you’re better than me now, after one year has passed since out match, you’re going to be shocked when you realize I’ve improved way more than you’ve anticipated  that I could. Trust me, Maki, you’ll not win our match.

Bea gives an X sign into the camera to indicate to Maki that she will be X’d out by Bea and lose in the match.

Bea:  Now I address you Krystal. You have more to lose than Maki does. Whereas Maki will lose her pride and followers when I win the match you not only lose your pride and followers but you lose the Bombshell Roulette Championship to me. Our previous match was April 11, 2021, at Climax Control 296. I can’t use the same logic that I’ve improved a lot since our match. That’s because our match wasn’t from a year ago, it was from three months ago. In that match you pinned me for the win and I admire what you were able to accomplish against me. However, Krystal, at Summer XXXTreme IX things are different and I’ll explain that shortly. All you need to know is the same thing I told Maki and that is you’ll be X’d out of the match by me.

Bea stares into the camera while pointing to herself.

OVERCOMING PREVIOUS LOSSES

Bea:  Now is the time for me to rectify those losses to you two. Yeah, okay, I already know what you two will say. Both of you will try to claim that you have. . .well you HAD anyway. . .better wrestling skills than I did when we had our previous matches. Although comments like those sound nice to the uneducated viewers, who you can dupe with canned statements, the truth is that our match has little to do with wrestling and more to do with the physical and athletic aspects of the match. We’re not performing in a normal wrestling ring. We’re not wrestling on a mat. We’re not rebounding off the ropes to run into each other. We’re on a platform, in the shape of an X, over the pool, and we have to make sure not to lose our grasp or we fall into the pool which eliminates us from the match. This match is won by the wrestler, me of course, who can hang onto the X platform without losing my grip while at the same time beating the shit out of you two and knocking you off the platform. So the winner. . .ME. . .will win by eliminating both of you by knocking you off the X, into the pool, then grabbing the Championship Belt.

Bea lets out a sinister laugh.

THE EYES ARE TELLING

Bea:  Bill, and those he hired to help me learn the sport of wrestling, taught me a lot but there’s one thing Bill taught me that is the most important thing for every wrestler to know and understand. Bill explained that many wrestlers were intimidated when having to wrestle against opponents who wore a mask. Their excuse for being intimidated was they were unable to see the face of their opponents to know how much damage, if any, they were inflicting upon them. Bill said he knew to look into their eyes as their eyes are exposed. He said a person can hide their hurting by hiding behind a mask but their eyes tell the truth that they are hurting. Krystal. . .Maki. . .recently Bill asked me what I see when I watch you two spewing forth boasting statements. I told Bill I see fear in your eyes. I told Bill that I hear statements of doubt coming from Maki which means she’s no longer sure of her abilities. I hear boastful statements from Krystal but when I look into her eyes I see the doubt. That day I saw one of the biggest smiles on Bill’s face when he realized I understood what he taught me. So, Maki, so Krystal, no matter how you try to hide your pain and your fear of facing me in this match I can see in your eyes if you are hurting or scare or both. Once I see any, or both, of those indications I’ll go totally off on you and eliminate you from the match. Can you two do that to me? Nah! I know how to keep my emotions in check and I don’t allow my eyes to expose me. Have fun trying and failing.

The camera person gets an extreme close up of Bea.

Bea:  I want you two victims to listen carefully so everyone will know what I said and what I meant and when you two try to deny it they will get in your face and call you out for lying about what I said. Maki all I’ve heard from you for months is how doubting you are of your abilities in the wrestling ring. You’ve commented that you feel like you are failing in matches and you question why you continue to accept matches since you just chump yourself out. If you doubt yourself in the ring that much then why are you still in the sport? Why are you still on the roster? Why do you keep accepting matches? For damn sure you’ll know that your wrestling ability next to nil when I easily take you out of this match. As for you, Krystal, it is a bit of a different situation but the result will be the same. You talk so much shit no wonder your breath stinks. You also lie about others like when you lied on why I snagged the Roulette Championship to clean and sanitize it before I handed it back to you. Your problem is the same problem most wrestlers have and that is, deep down, you doubt your abilities in the ring so you have to counter that doubt by lying about others. You may think I don’t have the abilities to defeat you and Maki but when I walk away as the newly crowned Bombshell Roulette Champion you two will no longer have doubt about my abilities. Remember what I’m about to say so that when you try to deny what I said I can replay the video of my comments to prove I was telling the truth again and you were lying about me again. Maki. . .Krystal. . .while you two are arguing with each other during the match on who you believe has the better ring skills between the two of you I’ll have already won the match. By the time you hear the announcer proclaim me the winner of our match, and as the newly crowned Sin City Wrestling Bombshell Roulette Champion, I’ll already have possession of the Championship Belt and I’ll be on my way to my dressing room. Sorry to rain on your parade girls but I’m in this match to win and there’s nothing you two can do to stop me.

END

132

Supercard Archives / Re: FENRIS/BROTHER DAVID v SENOR VINNIE/BULLDOG BILL BARNHART

« on: July 07, 2021, 08:20:24 AM »

WE’RE FACING OPPONENTS WHO DON’T MIX WELL TOGETHER

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart is teamed with his friend, and Tag Team partner, Senor Vinnie, in match against the team of Brother David and Fenris at Summer XXXTreme IX. This should be an interesting match as Bill and Vinnie are a great team and work well together but the team of Fenris and Brother David are two wrestlers who will not be able to work together as a viable team.

The break provided by the camera person is over and the Network returns control to the camera person and they get a shot of Bill sitting at the patio table with Iris sitting on the patio next to him. They inform Bill they are now live broadcasting.

WE ARE THE BETTER TAG TEAM

Bill:  I wish to welcome everyone and thank you for tuning in for my comments leading up to my Tag Team match at Summer XXXTreme IX. I’ll start my comments here on our patio at our home in Lawrenceville, Georgia, but since it is starting to get hot out here once it gets to the point where I don’t want to remain in the heat I’ll transfer inside the house and finish my presentation from there.

Bill takes a drink of Classic Coke then returns the can to the patio table.

Bill:  Today I’ll present information proving that our team, consisting of me and Senor Vinnie, is the better team as we work well together while there is proof that Fenris and Brother David Shepherd are not going to be able to work together. It should be obvious to everyone, if you’ve been paying attention, that David can’t even get along with his own family members so you know he can’t get along with another wrestler especially one as talented as Fenris. When we saw Fenris and David in the Front Office, with Management telling them they have to team up even though they can’t get along, that was one of the most hilarious things I’ve seen in a long time.

DISABLING OPPONENTS

Bill becomes annoyed when the flies in his backyard start buzzing him and Iris. Bill is swiping at the flies while Iris attempts to snag flies but she’s too slow to catch them. Bill, being quicker than Iris, swipes at a fly and snags it and has the fly trapped in his hand. Bill slowly opens his hand and with his other hand he picks the fly up with his fingers. He then holds the fly in his fingers and pulls the wings off the fly. After Bill has de-winged the fly he places the it on the the patio table but the incapacitated fly can’t fly since Bill removed their wings so all it can do is walk around on the patio table.

Bill:  Here’s a riddle for you. What do you call a fly that can no longer fly? You call it a WALK of course. Har har har!

Bill realizes not everyone watching detests flies like he does so he gives an explanation.

Bill:  Before you get evil on me for taking out this fly let me explain. Flies are disgusting. You know what I mean. They’re disgusting just like wrestlers like Brother David Shepherd are disgusting. Flies have sticky feet and they’re attracted to shit and they like to walk around in the shit and often lay their eggs in it. Now, honestly, do those of you watching my presentation still feel compassionate toward this fly knowing that it walks around on shit and then walks on your food, on you, your clothing, and other places in and around your home? Do you still feel compassion for this fly that can bring you severe illness and disease? If you still have compassion for flies then you probably also have compassion for Brother David Shepherd for being a pathetic shit bag of a wrestler but that’s your business not mine. But for the sake of showing that I have a little bit of compassion for this wing-less fly, who is now called a WALK since they can no longer fly, I’ll ensure he has a quick ending. Watch this.

Bill picks up the wingless fly from the patio table and holds it up into the air in his fingers. Bill whistles to the birds looking on and one of the birds swoops down and snags the fly from Bill’s hands and quickly devours it. The bird then flies off chipping a thank you to Bill for the snack. Bill picks up his can of Classic Coke, takes a drink, then raises the can of Classic Coke in the air as a thank you to bird.

Bill:  It’s starting to get hot here in the backyard, and the flies are picking up their action, so instead of torturing more flies I’ll move inside the house. Once the camera person is ready to broadcast from our living room we will return to my presentation.

There’s a short break as the camera person moves their camera into the living room inside the house. Once Bill and Iris are in the living room and sitting on the couch the camera person informs the Network to continue broadcasting.

Bill:  This is much better inside the house. We don’t have the heat since the air conditioning is on and we don’t have the flies annoying us. Ahhhhh!!!

Bill and Iris stretch then Bill returns looking into the camera to continue with his comments.

ELIMINATING ANNOYING OBJECTS

Bill:  Before I go into comments to destroy the egos of Brother David and Fenris I’d like to show you a video of a competition Iris was involved in recently. The lead-in for this competition is that an organization here in the State of Georgia has a Fly Tracking competition where people enter their dogs into the competition to see which dog is the best at tracking, and killing, flies. I entered Iris into this competition because although she is slow in speed to actually catch flies she is superior when it comes to killing them. Just watch the video of the competition instead of me trying to explain the performance of Iris to you.

The video of the dog fly tracking and killing competition begins to play and we watch with interest since we’ve never seen a competition like this before. The Narrator explains the competition to the viewers.

Narrator:  The concept of this competition is to see how well the dogs can track and kill flies. Some of the dogs are quick and can snap at the flies while the flies are flying and kill them in mid-flight. Other dogs who are slower in speed have to find other ways to kill the flies. We have set up a table where we placed dozens of containers of sugar water to attract the flies. The winner of this competition isn’t always the dog who is the quickest to snag flies out of the air as the final scores are decided by a combination of tracking ability, killing ability, and the dog being able to reason out what they need to do to win this competition. As the flies come in to get the sugar water the dogs do their thing as you can see.

Bill:  This next part is what I want you to pay attention to. It is where Iris shows that just because she’s slow doesn’t mean she isn’t a great fly killer.

As the video of the dog fly tracking competition continues we watch as Iris slowly waddles around near the table that has the sugar water containers on it. Iris knows the other dogs are more agile and quick than she is but she also knows she has the secret weapon to win this competition. Iris calmly watches the other dogs do their thing and after the other doggy contestants have done their thing Iris walks down-wind of the table where sugar water was placed to attract flies. Iris turns around and walks to the end of the table so that she is down-wind of the table and the wind is blowing strongly toward her. She turns so her ass is facing toward the table and even with the wind blowing heavily toward her, she lets go with a horrendous deadly fart that drives into the wind and immediately kills all the flies on the table. The other dogs in the competition run off knowing they have just been defeated by Iris. The people running the competition hand the trophy to Iris to declare her the winner and the video ends.

Bill:  That’s my girl Iris! Way to go! Although most of you don’t like me, Vinnie, or Iris, you have to admit Iris has special abilities other dogs can only fantasize about. Although you’re probably not understanding why I showed you the competition with Iris rest assured I’ll explain it to you. Just as all the other dogs in the fly tracking and killing competition thought they were the best because they were quick and agile so wrestlers like Fenris and Brother David feel they are the best because they think they are quick and agile. But what happened in the doggy competition? Iris laid back watching the other dogs do what they seem to do best then Iris let go with her secret weapon and humiliated all the other competitors. That’s exactly what me and Vinnie will do to Fenris and Brother David. We’ll allow you two to strut around the ring and run your mouths during the match but when the time comes we’ll do like Iris and do what we do best and hand you two the defeat in the match.

Bill looks at the clock and when he sees what time it is he gets excited.

WHAT YOU USED TO BE IS NOT A VALID CLAIM FOR WHAT YOU ARE NOW

Bill:  Sorry for the distraction but when I looked at the clock I noticed it is time for one of my favorite programs on television. The name of the program is Comedy Parody TV and they make fun of real events by presenting a parody skit of it. Please endure the short break in my comments as most of their skits are short. Since they only present a skit once a week I need to watch it, and you can watch it also, then I’ll return to my regular presentation.

Comedy Parody TV comes on and the cameraman focuses on it. It appears they are doing a parody of the Saddam Hussein criminal trial in Iraq. We watch and listen to their parody version of the trial.

Prosecutor:  Saddam Hussein do you know why you are being prosecuted at this trial?

Saddam:  Because I am the leader of Iraq and you hate me! I am Saddam Hussein. I am Iraqi!

Prosecutor:  I have some some questions for you. I ask the questions and, by law, you are required to give me an honest answer. Do you understand?

Saddam:  F**k You! I am Saddam Hussein. I am Iraqi!

Prosecutor:  I will take that as an honest answer. The question I have is what is your favorite song?

Saddam:  Iraqi Raccoon!

Prosecutor:  What is your favorite ice cream?

Saddam:  Iraqi Road!

Prosecutor:  And, finally, what is your favorite cartoon show?

Saddam:  Iraqi and Bullwinkle! What the hell do these questions have to do with my criminal trial?

Prosecutor:  Nothing at all. We just wanted to have fun at your expense. You are already found guilty and you have received the death sentence. Have a great day.

Saddam:  What? This isn’t a trial this is a circus! I demand to be let go! I am Saddam Hussein and I am the leader of Iraq! I am Iraqi!

Prosecutor:  You WERE the leader of Iraq. Now you are not. Bye!

The parody skit on the Comedy Parody TV program is done and Bill turns off the television and returns to focus his attention to the camera.

Bill:  On this edition of Comedy Parody TV it just happened to be a parody skit of the Saddam Hussein criminal trial in Iraq. It could have been any parody skit but this one, of Saddam Hussein’s criminal trial, works perfectly for my presentation with our upcoming match. How’s that you ask? Good question so here’s the good answer. Saddam Hussein was defiant at his criminal trial until he was executed by the Death Penalty. He kept demanding everyone acknowledge him as the leader of Iraq and the Prosecutor kept reminding him that he WAS the leader of Iraq but as of the trial he was only a criminal who was being prosecuted for his crimes. For Fenris and Brother David I see the comparison. No I’m not stating you two should be on trial and receive a sentence of some sort from your trial. The comparison I make is that in the trial Saddam Hussein kept stating he IS the leader of Iraq and the Prosecutor had to keep reminding him that he WAS the leader of Iraq but he is not any longer. The comparison? Both of you held Championships and it seems that both of you like to remind everyone that you were such-and-such Champion. I respond, as the Prosecutor in the Saddam trial did, that you two WERE Champions at one time but you are not Champions now. You can talk all the talk, smack, and shit, you want, but the fact remains that since you two held Championships not much has come your way. When we have our match at Summer XXXTreme IX you two will bumble around trying to figure out how two egotistical smart asses can work together to appear viable in our match while me and Vinnie will easily defeat you two as we are a fantastic team and work well together. You two need to deal with that as you have no choice but to deal with the truth.

Bill lets out a hearty laugh and that causes Iris to attempt a laugh also and that causes Bill to laugh even louder. When Bill regains his composure he continues with his comments.

HONESTY

Bill:  Fenris. . .David. . .Although you’re probably screaming at your televisions calling me a jerk let me assure you that I’m a fair person and I tell the truth. For the benefit of everyone watching I’ll run down our match history so everyone knows the facts and the truth.

Bill picks up a sheet of paper.

Bill:  When I came to Sin City Wrestling I made it clear I had a request for three dream matches. The opponents included in those dream matches were Fenris, Griffin Hawkins, and Casey Williams. I admire the work of Fenris and Hawkins and since Casey was the first wrestler in my career to hand me a loss in my original home town of Oakland, California, I wanted a match with him to even the score. Casey hasn’t accepted yet but I hope that he will some day.

Bill rattles the paper in his hand.

Bill:  The first dream match was against you, Fenris, at Climax Control 249 on September 29, 2019, and it was a fantastic match and you won by pinfall. I had another match against you at Climax Control 288 on December 20, 2020, and this time you got the submission win over me. As for you, Brother David, we had a multi-wrestler Roulette Championship match, at Climax Control 286 on December 6, 2020,where the winner was the wrestler who could grab the Roulette Championship from the raised platform and land on the mat with possession of it. Both of us grabbed onto the Roulette Championship and fell off the platform. Both of us had possession of it until we hit the mat. When we hit the mat the force was enough to cause me to lose my grip on the Championship and you ended up maintaining your grip on it for the win.

Bill places the sheet of paper on the couch.

Bill:  I don’t call your victories cheap. I don’t call your victories illegal. I don’t call you jerks or assholes for those victories. All three of those victories were obtained within the rules of the match. I’m not like other wrestlers in the Federation who complain about every loss as if all their opponents cheated them. Although I acknowledge these victories by Fenris and Brother David the fact remains that they have been placed together as a Tag Team to face the team of me and Senor Vinnie. When you have two wrestlers like us, who are friends, outstanding wrestlers, and exceptional Tag Team partners, going up against a team thrown together, with one member who cannot even work with his own family members but he is expected to work with a wrestler more talented and respected than he is, you have is a recipe for disaster for their team. Remember that you heard it from me that me and Vinnie will be victorious in our match against Brother David and Fenris. Thanks for joining me today for my presentation.

Bill gives the CUT sign to the camera person and they call into the Network to let them know they are cutting their camera feed. They are quick to return to regularly scheduled programming the instant the camera person cuts their feed.

133

Supercard Archives / Re: KRYSTAL WOLFE v MAKI v BEA BARNHART - ULTIMATE X ROULETTE TITLE

« on: July 07, 2021, 08:10:27 AM »

MY WIN IN THE ULTIMATE X OVER THE POOL MATCH WILL BE AWESOME

Narrator:  Everyone doubted Bea Barnhart when she said she was going to earn her spot in the Ultimate X Over The Pool match at Summer XXXTreme IX. Now that Bea won her match to challenge for the Bombshell Roulette Championship people are still doubting her. Oh well people are allowed to believe whatever they want. With those opening comments out of the way I turn you over to Bea Barnhart who is at her home in Lawrenceville, Georgia, along with her husband Bill Barnhart and their English Bulldog Iris.

BRUISED BUT NOT OUT OF ACTION

The scene switches and the camera person assigned to present Bea’s comments pans around the backyard at the home of Bill and Bea Barnhart in Lawrenceville, Georgia. We see Bea, Bill, and Iris, relaxing in their backyard. Bea is dressed in white shorts and  white tee shirt that accent her brown Filipina skin. Bill is wearing khaki shorts and a blue Old Navy shirt. Bill is annoyed by the flies buzzing around. The flies cannot help what they are doing because they smell food they are just doing what flies do but they are still annoying Bill. Iris is trying to catch the flies as they come near her but she’s too slow to catch them. Bea sits down in a chair next to Bill.

Bill:  Let me take a look at your head.

Bea:  Okay but don’t tap on my head or squeeze it as it still hurts from when Krystal whacked me with the Roulette Championship belt last week at Climax Control 305.

Bea leans over to let Bill inspects her head. He rubs his hand lightly over Bea’s head and he feels a bump on her head where the Roulette Championship hit her.

Bea:  Ouch!!! I told you not to press hard on my head!!!

Bill:  I’m not touching you hard. I barely touched your scalp. That blow on your head must have been harder than it looked on television.

Bea:  I don’t know the exact weight of Title Belts in Sin City Wrestling but I’m sure they’re around seven to ten pounds and getting hit in the head with the Bombshell Roulette Championship by Krystal Wolfe darn sure left a mark and the bruise is still hurting.

Bill:  I promise when you win the Roulette Championship at Summer XXXTreme IX your head won’t be hurting any longer. Amazing what a pain reliever earning a Championship is.

PAYBACK IS HELL

Bea:  So, Krystal, you didn’t accept my honest explanation of why I snagged the Roulette Championship Belt from your match with Maki at Climax Control 304.  I explained that I wanted to clean it up and sanitize it before I returned it to you. I guess when I took the Championship to clean it you immediately forgot you were just in a Mud Pit Match against Maki. Not only was the Championship Belt muddy it had some nasty stuff on it from Maki so I wanted to clean it up and sanitize it before I handed it back to you. It was a friendly gesture but you decided not to accept what I said. Once again I told the truth and once again you and others don’t want to believe the truth. You perpetrated an attack on me, at Climax Control 305, as I was returning to the backstage area. I promise everyone that I’ll pay you back for that attack by winning the Ultimate X Over The Pool match at Summer XXXTreme IX and this time when I walk away with the Bombshell Roulette Championship Belt it will be because I’m the newly crowned Champion. What really pisses me off, Krystal, is that you claim to be a good girl, with good intention s, with a good attitude, and a person who follows the rules and regulations, then you viciously attack me when I went into the backstage area to hand you the sanitized Bombshell Roulette Championship belt. Nice going presenting yourself as one thing then proving you’re an asshole as we’ve been claiming you are. Gawd I hate hypocrites.

Bill:  Oooooo somebody’s a bit upset eh?

Bea:  You would also be upset if what happened to me happened to you. I want revenge on Krystal and I’ll get it at Summer XXXTreme IX.

Bill:  You know that I’ve had my share of jerks attacking me before, during, and after matches, so I feel your pain. I’m going to take Iris for a walk around the neighborhood so you continue with your presentation for Summer XXXTreme IX and I’ll see where you’re  at in your presentation when we get back.

Bill and Iris leave the backyard to go on their walk. The cameraman follows them until they exit the gate then they return their focus on Bea.

Bea:  I wish to lay it out for Krystal and Maki. I’ll start with you Maki because you’re one of those wrestlers who has stuff handed to you when you haven’t earned them. Unlike you who gets stuff handed to you without proving you deserve it I’ve earned every Roulette match and Championship match I’ve been assigned to. As you clearly saw I earned my spot in the Ultimate X Over The Pool Bombshell Roulette Championship match at Summer XXXTreme IX. I didn’t get assigned to this match by kissing the asses of others. I didn’t get assigned to this match because I smile and make sexy eyes at others. I got assigned to this match because I earned my place in this match. You’re welcome to talk all the smack you want about me but when I walk away as the Bombshell Roulette Champion you’ll become a believer in me. You’re a lot like Krystal in that you try to portray yourself as a good girl, who has good intentions, but you act like you hate the world. Nothing like saying one thing then contradicting yourself with your words and actions.

Bea smiles into the camera.

Bea:  Now I return talking to you Krystal. I previously mentioned that you make the claim to be a good girl, with a good attitude, and a person who follows the rules and regulations, then you viciously attacked me when I went into the backstage area to hand to you a sanitized Bombshell Roulette Championship belt. You need to know several things. I hate fake people. I hate people who claim to tell the truth but all that comes out of their mouths are lies. I hate people who claim they’re nice mild-mannered people then they run up on another wrestler and perpetrate a vicious blindsided attack on them. I hate people who smile to my face then when they turn away a demonic look comes on their face. I hate hypocrites like you. I’ll get revenge at Summer XXXTreme IX. Oh, Krystal, you can be one hundred percent sure I’ll get my revenge.

Bea again smiles into the camera.

Bea:  Let me lay it out for you two victims. Yes I refer to you two as victims because you’ll be victims when I win the Ultimate X Over The Pool match at Summer XXXTreme IX. Will I go easy on you two? Hell no! I’m coming into this match as a challenger and leaving as the Champion. I plan on coming into the match full speed and I’ll be non-stop in attacking you two. Both of you disgust me. Both of you make me want to puke. Both of you make me want to hurt you to the point where you’ll consider retiring from wrestling. I’m not coming into this match to take it easy on you two. I’m coming into this match to beat you two so hard that you’ll hate me for the rest of your pathetic lives.

Bea smiles into the camera a third time but this smile is an evil one.

MY TIME TO SHINE

Bea:  Summer XXXTreme IX is MY event. MY time to shine. MY time to earn the Bombshell Roulette Championship. I deserve to represent Sin City Wrestling as Bombshell Roulette Champion. When you two walk away as losers I see several things happening. Maki when I win the Bombshell Roulette Championship I see you becoming more sad, depressed, and doubtful of your wrestling abilities. I see you walking away from the sport of wrestling to try some other sport that you might actually be able to be successful in. As for you Krystal I see something different. When I win the Bombshell Roulette Championship I see you becoming more determined, and desperate, to have matches with me to attempt to earn the Championship back. The problem is you can have all the desire, determination, and desperation to earn back the Championship but since you were unable to successfully defend it against me what the hell makes you think you can earn it back? Don’t worry Krystal I’ll give you the one required re-match so that you can have a few more minutes before the camera to prove to the world you’re not as great as you claim you are. As for me I’d find it beyond hilarious to soundly defeat you at Summer XXXTreme IX for the Bombshell Roulette Championship then soundly defeat you again when I give you the required rematch as the former Champion. It’s a lose-lose situation for you and a win-win situation for me.

Bill and Iris return from their walk. Bill takes a seat at the patio table and Iris sits on the patio deck next to Bill’s chair.

Bill:  How did your presentation go?

Bea:  I clearly laid it out for Maki and Krystal. I made sure they know how pathetic and worthless they are. I made it clear that I’m becoming the next Sin City Wrestling Bombshell Roulette Champion and there’s nothing they can do to stop me.

Bill:  You’ll make a great Roulette Champion Bea.

Bea:  Damn right I will.

Bill:  Are you almost done with your comments? I’m not rushing you to end your presentation but the camera person is here for only a specific amount of time so once you’re done I need to air my presentation.

Bea:  I’m done with my comments. I’m going inside to take care of stuff in the house so the remaining broadcast time belongs to you.

Bea excuses herself and walks into the house. The camera person informs Bill they will take a break for about fifteen minutes then return to air Bill’s comments for his match at Summer XXXTreme IX.

The camera person cuts his camera feed and the Network returns to regularly scheduled programming until the camera person’s break is over.

134

Climax Control Archives / ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP HERE I COME

« on: June 16, 2021, 05:07:56 PM »

ROULETTE CHAMPIONSHIP HERE I COME

Narrator:  Here we are again with Bea Barnhart in a Roulette Championship Qualifier match to earn a spot in the Roulette Championship Ultimate X Over The Pool Match at Summer XXXTtreme IX. Bea is no stranger to Roulette Rules matches and she previously had a shot at the Roulette Championship but came up short on that evening so she wants to win this match, face the others in the Ultimate X Over The Pool Match at Summer XXXTreme IX, and redeem herself. That’s all I want to say to lead into Bea’s comments on her match at Climax Control 303. I now turn you over to Bea for her to give you the information you are anxious to hear.

When the scene switches we see Bea Barnhart relaxing in their hotel room. Bill and their English Bulldog Iris are walking around but trying to stay out of camera view as best they can. Bea is sitting at the dining table facing the camera. Bea is dressed in her trademark wrestling attire and she definitely looks ready to kick ass at Climax Control 303. When the camera person informs Bea they are live broadcasting Bea begins her presentation.

Bea:  Hi and welcome to another edition of you all shut the hell up and listen to me talk. I’m here to present reasons why I’m walking away from this match to challenge for the Roulette Championship at Summer XXXTreme IX in an Ultimate X Over The Pool match. The first thing I wish to get out of the way is that I’m no stranger to Roulette Rules matches and that I’ve come a long way since a year ago and it will show in my performance at this Sunday.

Bea takes a break to sip some water before continuing.

Bea:  My first Roulette Rules match was on February 16, 2020, at My Bloody Valentine III. I soundly defeated Violet Amelia Holt in a Fans Bring The Weapons match to earn the Number One Contender spot for the Bombshell Roulette Championship. My second Roulette Rules match was on April 12, 2020, at Blaze of Glory VIII was a Ladder Match for the Roulette Championship and I came up a little short that evening and didn’t earn the Roulette Championship. My third Roulette Rules match was on September 13, 2020, at Climax Control 280. It was a Triple Threat for a chance to face Seleana Zdunich at Violent Conduct VI for the Roulette Championship. I lost that match but I gave a hell of a fight.

Bea breaks again to drink more water then she continues.

Bea:  I imagine the majority of you watching are screaming at your television sets but I’m unable to hear what you’re saying so you waste your energy. You know what I mean. Wasting energy like Candy and Char Kwan will be wasting their energy trying to defeat me in our match. I imagine you’re asking how I’m so confident and feel I’m qualified to challenge for the Roulette Championship when I’m 1-2 in Roulette Rules matches and 0-1 in Roulette Championship matches. That’s a good question and I have a good answer. Back during the times of those matches I was new to the sport of wrestling as it pertains to being a wrestler inside the ring instead of being the Manager in Bill’s corner. To come away with one win in three matches AND to have earned a shot at the Roulette Champion tells you a lot of what I was able to accomplish as a rookie in the sport of wrestling. Now that I’ve been in the ring as a wrestler for seventeen months my experience and abilities continue to grow. Taking out Char Kwan and Candy will be easier than those of you watching are willing to give me credit for being able to accomplish. Promise me that you will not blink your eyes during my match because I’ll defeat Char and Candy so quickly you might miss my win when you blink.

MY OPPONENTS

Bea:  My two opponents in this Roulette Championship Qualifier match are Candy and Char Kwan. I mentioned that I lost the Roulette Championship match against Candy a long time ago. I look at it that if Candy was such a Great Roulette Champion she would still be Roulette Champion but she’s not. Seeing that she lost the Roulette Championship shows she’s vulnerable and even more so going up against me now that I’m seasoned and more than ready and determined to whup ass. As for Char Kwan I have no history with her but I know enough about her to know she is way down on the talent ladder, in the basement if you will, and she’ll not be any more annoying than a fly that hovers over a pile of shit. I’ll swat Char out of the way and zap her like I’m a bug zapper. This match literally comes down to me and Candy and I’m walking away with my shot at the Roulette Championship at Summer XXXTreme IX.

ELEMENTS

Bea:  Candy. . .Char. . .you’re probably aware of the Periodic Table that lists all the Elements by their names and Atomic numbers. Well I guess you might be aware of it but I’m not sure either of you were able to take in major concepts like that during your school years as you two continue to prove you are mentally deficient and are unable to comprehend even the simplest things. If you two do happen to know what the Periodic Table is then you know that the Atomic Numbers of all the elements listed runs from 1 which is Hydrogen and it goes up from there. Oh man I’m sorry I have to use such big complicated words and concepts that confuse the two of you but that’s honestly how the Periodic Table is set up. I’m sure both of your heads are hurting from trying to grasp simple concepts but if you think I give a shit that your heads hurt you’re wrong. Rest assured after I beat both of you down in our match your heads will hurt for a long time after the match is over.

Bea holds up a copy of the Periodic Table for the camera to get a shot of.

Bea:  I want you two to know that I’m having this Periodic Table modified to include a new entry that depicts you two perfectly. The Atomic Number of the new element will be 0 or if you are having a hard time comprehending numbers it would be Z. . .E. . .R. . .O  because you two are ZERO compared to me. The name of the new Element reflects you two by being called MORONIUM letting everyone know you two are morons. Yes you two can rest assured that for added impact your faces will be placed on the new entry so everyone can see what you two MORONIUMS look like.

Bea lets out a very loud laugh that causes Bill and Iris to stop what they are doing and they look over at her. When they realize she’s laughing at comments she made to Candy and Char, and that they might be in the range of the camera, they return to what they were doing.

TO INFINITY AND BEYOND

Bea:  My friend is a Math teacher at Sweetwater Middle School in Lawrenceville, Georgia. She complains about Disney for having Buzz Lightyear having his signature statement as TO INFINITY AND BEYOND! Why? She asks HOW COULD DISNEY COME UP WITH A LAME SIGNATURE STATEMENT AS THAT FOR BUZZ LIGHTYEAR? INFINITY IS FOREVER THEREFORE YOU CANNOT MAKE STATEMENT LIKE TO INFINITY AND BEYOND AS THERE’S NOTHING BEYOND INFINITY!  Well that damn sure makes sense unless you are morons like Candy and Char. When I defeat you two to earn my shot at the Bombshell Roulette Championship at Summer XXXTreme IX you’ll watch me soar off into glory when I win the Bombshell Roulette Championship and successfully defend it for a very long time. Now, come on Char, come on Candy, both of you claim you are infinite and will destroy everyone in your way but you have failed constantly and you will fail again at Climax Control 303.

Bea snarls into the camera.

SLOW PROGRESS IS BETTER THAN NO PROGRESS

Bea:  I’ve had to listen to seventeen months of the rest of the roster making fun of me as I haven’t made as much progress as others on the roster have done. But I have a saying for what I’m accomplishing. That saying is SLOW PROGRESS IS BETTER THAN NO PROGRESS and I’m fully satisfied that I continue to make progress, move ahead, and have Management assign me to Championship matches or Championship Qualifier matches. Maybe two morons like you can’t see my progress but Management does and since Management pays my salary I’ll listen to them instead of listening to you two idiots. There have been many in Sin City Wrestling who came into the Federation and immediately won a few matches then failed after that. In my case, since I was a green rookie, I lost a few matches then quickly won a Roulette Championship Qualifier match. So what do you feel is a better thing to have? To win several matches early in your careers then crash and burn after the initial success or to slowly win matches and then you start getting sent into matches to challenge for Championships? Slow and steady is the key and slow progress is better than no progress.

Bea smiles into the camera.

YOU GET WHAT YOU EARN

Bea:  Before I close my comments concerning my match I wish to tell you about our neighbors in Lawrenceville, Georgia, Andrew and Rebecca. What I have to tell you concerns Rebecca who is an IT Tech for more than twenty years. When they moved to Georgia in 2012 she had several jobs that sucked to put it nicely. They didn’t pay well and they treated her like crap. Then she got a job at a Medical Testing company that franchises locations across the United States. She has been there since January 2014 so she is now five months into her seventh year. They rarely gave her good pay increases and never gave great performance evaluations even though she is one of their best employees. But Rebecca plugged along, accepting slow progress from her employers over no progress at all, and today she called me with great news on how her performance, qualifications, and skills, earned her something she wasn’t expecting. Rebecca said several weeks ago she started working with an Executive Recruiting firm and the woman she worked with, Natalie, put her name in for an Implementation Manager at one of the largest and most successful companies in the United States and all around the world. It is a work from home position and after several interviews, then a final interview with three Executives from the company she would be working for, Natalie called her and said the company she interviewed for is offering her $52 per hour for $110,000 per year. Wow! At her current company, after seven years working there she is currently at $58,000 so that means the new company is offering her nearly double what her current job is paying her after working for them for seven years. Do you see how the concept of slow progress is better than no progress works? Rebecca kept at her work, as she is the best IT person they have, and finally she got a fantastic job offer for close to double her current salary. Why did I tell you this story? Because you all treat me like I don’t deserve anything and yet I prove consistently that I earn what I get. That’s why I got this Triple Threat match to earn my way into the Roulette Championship match at Summer XXXTreme IX. Slow progress is better than no progress. I understand that concept. Vinnie understands that concept. Iris understands that concept. And most of the fans understand that concept.  But I cannot expect Miss Dumb and Miss Dumber, my two opponents, to understand that concept. When I defeat you two, and you two get to stay at home and watch Summer XXXTreme IX instead of being assigned to a match for that event, or worse yet they get assigned to a low card match at Summer XXXTreme IX just to fill space, they’ll finally get it.

Bea points to herself while starting her closing comments.

Bea: Char you should not be in this match and you’ll not fare well. Candy you will fare better than Char will but you’ll still be defeated by me. Say what you want. Hurl all the slurs and insults my direction if you want. Brag about yourselves if you want. I’ve had my say and I’ll back up what I’ve said. See you two at Climax Control 303.

Bea informs the camera person she’s done with her comments and they call into the Network to let them know they are cutting their camera feed. The camera person is so quick on cutting the camera feed the screen goes dark and it takes the Network nearly a minute to get regular programming broadcasting again.

135

Climax Control Archives / NO JOKING

« on: June 10, 2021, 11:24:32 AM »

NO JOKING OR JESTING. . .JUST SERIOUS ASS KICKING

Narrator:  King For The Day Vinnie has assigned Bill Barnhart and Austin James Mercer to a Royal Court Jester Match. King Vinnie placed the rules of this match that in order to win the match you must totally remove the Jester outfit your opponent is wearing. There’s no doubt in my mind that Bill Barnhart will be the one to rip the Jester outfit off Austin James Mercer for the win. I just hope Bill doesn’t end up taking too much off of Mercer or there may be some censoring in order by the Network.

The scene changes and we are taken to the dressing room area that Bill Barnhart is using during Climax Control 302. The camera gets a shot of Bill and we see he dressed in his Court Jester outfit, complete with a felt hat that has bells on the ends of the rim so it rings when he moves around, and he has a very elaborate Jester Scepter which he is holding in his hand. Bill walks around for a bit before taking a seat on the couch and laying the Jester Scepter next to him. Bill looks into the camera to give his presentation leading up to his Court Jester match against Austin James Mercer.

Bill:  Thanks for joining me. As you can see Bea and Iris are not here in the dressing room area with me. Iris isn’t here because I don’t want Management to get upset with me having her in the venue. They did, however, give me permission so that Iris can join me if I have a meet the fans thing going on but only for a short time and only in the backstage area. As for Bea she has a bit of a headache so she decided to stay in our hotel room and relax to help make the headache go away.

Bill pauses his comments to take a bite out of the slice of pepperoni pizza he has on a plate on the coffee table. He then picks up a can of Classic Coke, pops the top, and downs the entire can of Classic Coke. The carbonation, of course, does have an effect.

Bill:  Buuuuurrrrrppppp!!!!!  Oops! Excuse me! Too much carbonation at one time. Before I jump into comments for my Court Jester match with Austin James Mercer I’d like to get a few things that need to be put out there for public scrutiny out of the way.

Bill again pauses to eat some of his pepperoni pizza but this time he doesn’t drink Classic Coke so that he won’t be likely to burp loudly on television again.

Bill:  Well, Austin, things didn’t go as me and Bea thought they would. That’s how things work in the sport of wrestling. Things can change quickly in a match and the wrestlers need to accept how it went. Bea took a hard shot from Tempest on the outside of the ring and that allowed Tempest to pin Bea for the win. The bottom line is we accept the decision in the match and move on to the next match. Austin I’m truly amused because just when you thought you two winning the Mixed Tag Team Championship would get you away from me, so you wouldn’t have to deal with me again for a very long time, Vinnie, serving as King For The Day, assigned you to face me in a Royal Court Jester Match. The rules are simple. Both wrestlers have to wear a Court Jester outfit and the winner is the wrestler who can completely remove the Jester outfit their opponent is wearing. This will be easy for me to accomplish. I also thank King Vinnie for this match because the Mixed Tag Team Championship match was won when Tempest pinned Bea therefore you and I have unfinished business between us that I’ll take care of in our Court Jester match.

Barnhart again pauses and this time he finishes off the pepperoni pizza slice and again he doesn’t take a drink of Classic Coke so he won’t burp on camera again.

A JESTER’S RESPONSIBILITIES

Bill:  Austin although in a Kingdom the person serving as Court Jester has responsibilities to tell jokes, perform tricks, and make people laugh, that’s not what I’m in this match for. There will be no joking. There will be no jesting. There will be no tricks performed. I’m coming into this match to quickly rip the Court Jester outfit off of you for the victory. Since the Mixed Tag Team Championship match didn’t turn out the way my team wanted it to I accept the Referee’s decision on the match and move forward. However, Austin, you noticed that when the two of us were in the ring you were powerless against me. I was the Kryptonite to your thoughts that you are Superman. You were unable to pin me or apply an effective submission hold. I had you beat many times in that match but you somehow managed to tag Tempest back into the ring. Also the fact that you two had to resort to taking the match outside the ring numerous times, and our Referee failed to reprimand you two for violating the rules, disappoints me. However, Austin, I’m not like you where I lose a match and then whine, bitch, moan, and cry about the loss. Bea got taken out and Tempest got the pinfall on her and I congratulate you two on defeating us for the Championship. Of course we wanted to hold the Mixed Tag Team Championship longer than a week but stuff happens and we accept that. There will be more Championships coming our way but I’m not going to focus on what may or may not come our way down the line. I’m here to focus on humiliating you when I rip your Jester outfit off for the win. I assure you that you have nowhere to run and nowhere to hide from the beat down I’m going to give you.

Barnhart smiles into the camera before continuing with his comments.

TWO WAYS OF LOOKING AT AUSTIN JAMES MERCER

Bill:  I’d like to run a short video showing two ways of looking at things and both of the way of looking at things portray you very well on how people should be looking at you.

The video begins to pay and we see three men walking down the street. The three stop when they see something on the sidewalk that, to us anyway, appears to be a pile of dog shit. Instead of simply walking around the dog shit they stop and start discussing with each other what this item could be, and the ways they can determine what the item is, then we see and hear the following.

First Man:  *squats down and picks up the dog shit with his hand* Well this thing sure feels like shit. *the man replaces the dog shit on the sidewalk then he stands up next to the other two men*

Second Man:  *squats down and places his face near the dog shit and takes a deep breath through his nose* Well it certainly smell like shit. *the second man stands up and joins the other two men*

Third Man:  *squats down and picks up the dog shit, brings his hand to his mouth, and places the dog shit into his mouth. He gags and nearly pukes when he tastes the foul taste of the dog shit* Well this thing really does taste like dog shit. So since it feels like shit, smells like shit, and tastes like shit, it damn sure must be shit. Sure glad we didn’t step in it. *he then stands up and joins the other two men*

The three men take off down the sidewalk satisfied they solved the mystery of what the item was on the sidewalk and even more proud of themselves for not accidentally stepping in the dog shit.

The video ends and we return to a shot of Bill Barnhart.

WHAT IS THE BOTTOM LINE?

Bill:  Austin I told you I’d show you a video and explain the references pertaining to you. The first reference is that you’re as worthless as a pile of dog shit on the sidewalk. The second reference is that you’re like those three men. Any intelligent person would have immediately recognized the item on the sidewalk as a pile of dog shit and they would have simply walked around it. But, no, the three idiots in the video had to touch it, smell it, and taste it, to confirm that it was, in fact, dog shit, and only after they defiled themselves did they decide to walk around the dog shit and continue on their way. That’s a perfect depiction of you Austin. You’re about as useless and disgusting as a pile of dog shit. You’re also a non-logical person who cannot think things through intelligently so you have to defile yourself first, like the three men in the video did, before you’re able to understand what is going on.

Bill decides to open another can of Classic Coke and he again downs the entire thing.

Bill:  Buuuuurrrrrppppp!!!!!  Oh, yeah, that felt good and defeating you Austin will feel even better! So, Austin, what’s the bottom line concerning our match? The simple definition is that I win and you lose but I want to take it further than that. When I quickly, and soundly, defeat you, half your fans will defect from you and come over to support me. When I quickly, and soundly defeat you, Management will send you back to the bottom of the Roster for you to work hard and earn your way back into contention for Championships. And don’t even try to state that you earned a shot at the Mixed Tag Team Championship because you didn’t earn a damn thing! That shot at the Mixed Tag Team Championship was handed to you by the Queen For The Day and both you and Tempest did nothing but complain about being handed that Title shot. In our Royal Court Jester match you can’t rely on Tempest to drag Bea to the outside of the ring, in violation of the rules, and attack her to beat her down for the win over me. No, Austin, there’s none of that crap in our match. It’s just you and me and I’ll absolutely, positively, overwhelmingly, without a doubt, defeat you so soundly that you may even leave the the sport of wrestling and go into retirement to avoid further humiliation. Thanks to those who tuned in to listen to my comments.

When the camera person hears Bill’s closing line he calls into the Network to inform them that his job airing Bill’s comments is finished. The Network cuts the feed and our screen goes dark for a short time before the Network puts up some commercials.

136

Climax Control Archives / OUR OPPONENTS DIDN'T EARN THEIR TITLE SHOT

« on: June 03, 2021, 09:04:53 AM »

AUSTIN JAMES MERCER AND TEMPEST DID NOT EARN THIS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH

Narrator:  Isn’t it pathetic that two wrestlers who didn’t do a damn thing to earn a shot at the Mixed Tax Team Championship, held by Bill and Bea  Barnhart, get a shot handed to them by Alicia Lucas who won her Queen For The Day match at Into The Void X? I could say a hell of a lot more but it is much more fun to have Bill Barnhart lay it out for you.

BILL AND BEA VISIT A STAND-UP COMEDY CLUB TO WATCH THEIR FRIEND PERFORM

The scene shifts to the Laugh Factory in Las Vegas. The venue is packed with people excited to watch people perform their stand-up comedy routines since tonight is Amateur Night which means no professional comedians are allowed to perform. We get a shot of Bill and Bea who have front-row seats as they here to watch their friend, Andrew, from Lawrenceville, Georgia, perform his stand-up comedy routine. The Emcee walks to the mic to introduce the first performer.

Emcee:  Thank you for coming to the Laugh Factory for our Amateur Night where only amateur comedians are allowed to perform. After all performers have presented their routines you in the audience will determine the winner by your applause and cheering. Our first performer comes all the way from Lawrenceville, Georgia, please give a warm welcome to Andrew Eide!

The Emcee walks off the stage while Andrew Eide comes out from behind the side curtain and walks to the mic.

Andrew:  Before I launch into my stand-up comedy routine I wish to acknowledge two persons in the audience. They are my neighbors in Lawrenceville, Georgia, and I came to Las Vegas to watch them defend their Mixed Tag Team Championship against the pathetic team of Austin James Mercer and Tempest. . .

* audience interrupts Andrew with overwhelming loud laughter *

Andrew:  Oh my! I can’t believe the outstanding laughter I got from the audience just from mentioning the names of the opponents for Bill and Bea in their match. I hope I can get half that amount of laughter from the audience with my comedy routine. Before I start my act I present to you Bill and Bea Barnhart! Please stand up and take bow.

Bill and Bea stand up and acknowledge the audience then they return to their seats and Andrew launches into his stand-up comedy routine.

Andrew:  Hi! My name is Andrew. Up until I was 10 years old I thought my name was DUMAS. You see, my Dad would call me:  HEY, DUMB ASS! COME HERE!!! I just thought he was pronouncing my name wrong!

* laughter from audience *

Andrew:  So my name is Andrew and my last name is Eide which is spelled E-I-D-E but it is pronounced like IDE. Most people see the spelling on my last name and they pronounce it as EDIE or EDDIE. So someone will call out EDIE. .  EDIE. . .and I start looking around for Steve Lawrence.

* the audience appears confused *

Andrew:  Apparently you being such a young audience you don’t remember the husband and wife singing duo of Steve Lawrence and Edie Gorme. Oh well…now I’d like to talk about my friend’s mother and father. For instance my friend’s mother is so fat.

* audience replies with HOW FAT IS SHE? *

Andrew:  My friend’s mother is so fat one day she wore a white dress and fifty cars parked in front of her because they thought they were at a drive-in movie!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  On another day my friend’s mother wore a green dress with white stripes on it and people thought she was a football field!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  Okay…Okay! I see the looks from the women in the audience. I don’t want you to think I’m disrespecting women so let me talk about my friend’s father. You see my friend’s father is so old.

* audience replies with HOW OLD IS HE? *

Andrew:  My friend’s father is so old when Archeologist found the Hieroglyphs they found his picture painted on the walls!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  He is so old that Methuselah calls him Pops!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  You know in the Bible where it says GOD SAID LET THERE BE LIGHT…AND THERE WAS LIGHT? The next thing heard was my friend’s father yelling out: HEY! TURN OUT THAT LIGHT! I’M SLEEPING HERE! Now that’s old!

* loud laughter from audience *

Andrew:  I want to return to my friend’s mother since I forgot to tell you that she is also ugly.

* audience replies with HOW UGLY IS SHE?

Andrew:  My friend’s mother is so ugly that they use her as a model for Gargoyles!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  She is so ugly that the Phantom of the Opera walked up to her, took off his mask, and handed it to her saying HERE, TAKE MY MASK, YOU NEED IT MORE THAN I DO!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  My friend’s mother is so ugly that when the Elephant Man saw her he screamed in horror!

* louder laughter from the audience *

Andrew:  She came over my house once and scared the fur off my cat!!!

* loud laughter from the audience *

Andrew:  Let me change the subject to language okay? My friend tried to teach me a little bit of Spanish the other day. I have to be honest with you that I have enough trouble with English but I listened to my friend anyway. For example my friend told me that AQUI means HERE. AQUI means HERE. Hmmm…I thought A KEY was something you put into a door to unlock the lock!

* audience laughs *

Andrew:  Then my friend told me that QUE means WHAT in Spanish. QUE means WHAT. I thought K was the eleventh letter of the alphabet.

* Andrew waits to see see if audience counts the letters of the alphabet to the letter K on their fingers *

Andrew:  I see you counting the letters on your fingers. A – B – C – D – E – F – G – H – I – J – K and then looking at each other and saying GEE, K IS THE ELEVENTH LETTER OF THE ALPHABET! I told you so! I wouldn’t lie to you!

* loud laughter from the audience *

Andrew:  Finally my friend told me the most confusing word of all. They said PORQUE means BECAUSE. PORQUE means BECAUSE? Oh come on now! EVERYONE knows that PORKY is a cartoon pig!!!

* very loud laughter from the audience *

At the last great response by the audience Andrew closes his stand-up comedy routine.

Andrew:  Thank you! Thank you very much! Remember my name is DUMAS. . .I mean Andrew. . .and you’ve been a fantastic audience! Thank you!!!

The Emcee walks up on the stage and Andrew hands the mic to him then exits into the backstage area. Our attention is turned to Bill and Bea Barnhart.

Bill:  That was a great stand-up comedy routine from Andrew. Too bad we can’t stay for the entire Amateur Night Competition as we have to get to the studio to finish airing our comments for our match at Climax Control 301.

Bea:  Even if Andrew doesn’t win the Amateur Night Competition I’m sure he’ll come out in the top three.

Bea and Bill stand up from their table and leave the Laugh Factory. The scene ends when they exit the venue.

A SHORT TIME LATER IN THE BROADCAST STUDIO

The scene returns and we get a shot of Bill and Bea Barnhart in the temporary broadcast studio which has been set up in Earl Wilson Stadium. Both are casually dressed in matching blue jeans and pink pullover shirts. The two are sitting at a large wooden desk like you would see two news anchors doing when they deliver the news.

AFTER A BREAK FOR LAUGHTER IT IS TIME TO GET SERIOUS

Bill:  I’ll start our comments for this presentation. Austin James Mercer eh? The man who proclaims he’s the best in the world and yet you’ve had your ass handed to you so often it has become the normal expectation in your matches. Get upset at my comments if you want as I honestly don’t give a damn what you think or how you feel. Although we’ve had only one match against each other, and that was at Into The Void IX on June 7, 2020, and you got the win, that win by you was a fluke. In our upcoming Mixed Tag Team Championship match I’ll humiliate you to the world when I defeat you and prove your previous win was a joke and shouldn’t have happened. Austin do you want to prove to the world that you are not a one-hit wonder in your previous win? If so then bring it on and prove it to the world by defeating me in our upcoming match. I dare you to try. . .but I damn sure will enjoy watching you lose to me.

THE TORTOISE AND THE HARE

Bill:  Hey, Austin, do you remember the story of The Tortoise and the Hare? The Tortoise who was slow and steady ended up winning the race while the Hare was over-confident and foolish. That’s how it is in the sport of wrestling. But before I go into that let me tell you about my best friend in High School at Skyline High School in Oakland, California. His name was Grant Mori, and he was Japanese, and he had endurance beyond what everyone else had. When we ran the one mile race on the school track Grant would go slow and steady while everyone else went quickly to start. They all quickly got tired and had to slow down while Grant kept up his pace. He rarely failed to come in first in his races. In fact in one of the one mile events one of Grant’s shoes came untied so he stopped on the track to tie his shoe. It took grant more than thirty seconds to tie his shoe but he got it tied, stood up, and still ended up winning the race. That’s how me and Bea work. Determined but slow and steady. You make less mistakes when you take your time to do things properly. And, Austin and Tempest, did you see how anxious and foolish Kate and Teddy were to the point where they did high risk moves only to have Bea lay Kate out for the win? If you two want to make high risk maneuvers which have a low percentage for success, then please feel free to do so but I ask you to talk with Teddy and Kate first before you make that decision otherwise you’ll have nobody to blame but yourselves.

ONE LAST COMPARISON

Bill:  I’ve never thought about myself in my wrestling career in a certain way until Bea came to me and mentioned how she sees me. I will let her explain it to you and then allow her to present her parody.

Bea:  Since the day I met Bill I’ve looked to him like Lois Lane looked up to Superman. Let me read to you the original opening dialogue of the Superman television program.

Bea picks up a sheet of paper and begins reading the original opening dialogue to the Superman television program.

Bea:  Faster than a speeding bullet.
More powerful than a locomotive.
Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
Look! Up in the sky!
It’s a bird. It’s a plane. It’s Superman!
Yes, it’s Superman. Strange visitor from another planet who came to Earth with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men. Superman who can change the course of mighty rivers, bend steel with his bare hands, and who, disguised as Clark Kent, mild mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper, fights the never ending battle for Truth, Justice and the American Way.

Bea looks up from the paper that she just read from presenting the original opening dialogue to the Superman television program.

Bea:  Now I will present the modified version I made to represent Bill as compared to Superman.

Bea picks up the second sheet of paper and begins reading her modified version of the original opening dialogue to the Superman television program.

Bea:  Faster than a speeding bullet.
More powerful than a locomotive.
Able to leap tall obstacles in a single bound.
Look! Up in the wrestling ring!
It’s a bird. It’s a plane. It’s Super Bill!
Yes, it’s Super Bill originally from Oakland, California, and now lives in Lawrenceville, Georgia, who came to Sin City Wrestling with powers and abilities far beyond those of normal wrestlers. Super Bill who can change the course of mighty rivers, bend steel with his bare hands, and who fights the never ending battle for Truth, Justice and the American Way.

>Bea puts the second sheet of paper down on the top of the desk then she stares into the camera.

Bea:  That’s how I see Bill. That’s how the majority of fans see Bill. After our decisive win over Austin James Mercer and Tempest at Climax Control 301 all the fans will see Bill as their Superman as I do.

Bill:  Thanks for the kind words and presenting me in a unique way to the fans and other wrestlers. I see you as my Lois Lane to you seeing me as your Superman. We make a hell of a great wrestling combination and that will be proven beyond a doubt this Sunday. Thanks to the viewers for joining us today. Tune in on Sunday, June 6, 2021, for Climax Control 301, where we destroy the dreams and careers of two pathetic opponents.

Bill and Bea do a HIGH FIVE then they both look toward the camera person and give the CUT sign and the camera person cuts their camera feed and our screen goes black. It takes the Network about 10 seconds to get regularly scheduled programming back on the screen.

137

Climax Control Archives / QUEEN ON THIS BITCH

« on: June 03, 2021, 08:56:21 AM »

QUEEN ON THIS BITCH!

Narrator:  I had a talk with Bea before I came on the air to give opening comments to lead into her comments concerning her match at Climax Control 301. Oh. . .my. . .gawd. . .Bea is to fired up that Satan came up from Hell, checked the temperature around Bea, and declared that the heat she is putting off makes Hell look like it is frozen over. With that I turn you over to Bea Barnhart.

The scene switches and we see Bea Barnhart in their hotel room which is located close to Earl Wilson Stadium. Bea is casually dressed in blue jeans and a black and white pullover shirt. She walks over to be in front of the camera then she sits down on a chair to present her comments.

NOT CONFIDENT OF HER ABILITIES ALICIA SENDS UNDERSTUDIES TO FACE OFF AGAINST US

Bea:  Well. . .well. . .well…what do we have here? We have Alicia Lucas, the Queen For The Day, deciding to take on the current Bombshell Champion, which she will lose against Amber Ryan, but she decided to send two losers against myself and Bill for the Mixed Tag Team Championship. You’re probably asking yourself why I call the team of Austin James Mercer and Tempest LOSERS when at least Austin has held the World Championship and Internet Championship and that is a good question. Although Mercer has managed to win a Championship here and there the fact remains that he’s a loser as he has proven numerous times. Winning a Championship and managing to hold onto it for an extended period of time are different things. As for Tempest she was simply tossed into this match by Alicia Lucas because Alicia is tied up with her demand as Queen For The Day to face Amber Ryan and lose. But enough about dissing Alicia since our match is not against her but against Austin James Mercer and Tempest.

SURPRISE

Bea’s husband, Bill, walks into the room followed by their English Bulldog Iris. Bill is holding in his hands a Red Velvet Cake, which is Bea’s favorite, and she is surprised as she didn’t know Bill got into the kitchen and prepared the cake for her without her seeing him doing it.

Bea:  Wow Bill! What a great surprise! Thank you! But I also have a surprise for you as I also managed to sneak into the kitchen and I prepared a Key Lime Pie for you.

Bea runs into the kitchen and comes out with the Key Lime Pie for Bill. Bill and Bea hand their cake and pie to the other with Iris drooling hoping she’ll get some of both.

Bill:  You continue with your presentation for our match. I’ll go into the kitchen with Iris and the two of us will devour this wonderful Key Lime Pie you made for us.

Bea returns to her chair and she places the Red Velvet Cake on the small table next to her.

YOU TWO GOT SOMETHING YOU DIDN’T DESERVE

Bea:  I won’t bore you by eating the Red Velvet Cake that Bill made while on camera while I’m presenting comments for our upcoming defense of the Mixed Tag Team Championship. For now I’ll continue to inform and instruct Tempest and Austin on just how unlucky they were that Alicia Lucas totally screwed you two by giving you a shot at OUR Mixed Tag Team Championship. You would never have received a shot at us if it wasn’t for Alicia abusing her privilege serving as Queen For The Day. But that’s okay. Really it is. We win. . .you two lose…can’t get any simpler to understand than that. Then again I cannot expect you two to understand common sense and truth.

When Bea breaks in her talking and she can hear Bill and Iris in the kitchen devouring the Key Lime Pie she made for them. Bea cannot help but have a huge smile come on her face knowing Bill and Iris enjoy her dessert.

Bea:  There is something I find interesting. I have yet to face off against Alicia Lucas in the ring but apparently she didn’t feel like challenging for the Mixed Tag Team Championship against an unknown opponent in me. Yeah, I know, the common excuse will be that she wants another chance at the Bombshell Championship, but if you really thought your stuff was great why didn’t you team with Austin and take me and Bill on? If you ask me that screams volumes about you and how not-so-well you truly believe in yourself. As for you, Tempest, I also have no history in the ring against you. After our match at Climax Control 301 I will have the history of being 1-0 over you.

Bea is amused when Bill and Iris walk out of the kitchen and head for the bedroom.

Bea:  Are you two headed to take a nap after devouring the entire Key Lime Pie?

Bill:  Yep! Sorry to say that I only got one-fourth of the pie since Iris is a pig and ate three-fourths of it before I could reach over and snag what was left. Continue with your comments. I hope our snoring won’t disturb you.

Bill and Iris walk into the bedroom and Bill closes the door to ensure when he and Iris fall asleep their snoring will not bother Bea.

Bea:  * glancing over at the table next to her at the Red Velvet Cake *  I understand why Bill and Iris downed the entire Key Lime Pie I made for them. This Red Velvet Cake Bill made is calling my name and begging me to eat it so when I’m done with my presentation you can be sure I’ll dive into the cake. Before I continue on comments concerning our upcoming match, and our two pathetic, and undeserving of a shot at a Championship, opponents Austin and Tempest, I’d like to get a few other things presented.

Bea hears snoring from the bedroom where Bill and Iris went to take a nap. Even with the door closed the snoring is loud.

COMMENTS ABOUT BILL THAT I DETEST

Bea:  I wish to talk about something that has been bothering me for a long time. That item is that many of the wrestlers on the Roster call Bill old and washed up and others call him a racist because he doesn’t believe in some things that others believe in. So let me start with the old and washed up comments concerning Bill. Since most of you are idiots and don’t do your research Bill is only thirty seven years of age, which is not old in the wrestling profession, and he’s been wrestling since he was eighteen. He is also six feet four inches and 240 pounds and you want to also call him overweight? While you don’t want to support Bill because you think he is too old to continue wrestling you go out to wrestling events, put on by other wrestling federations, where the average age of their wrestlers is pushing fifty years of age. You also support and root for obese wrestlers who make Bill look skinny but you want to condemn Bill for his weight. Stop being hypocrites. Either be consistent and tell the truth or get the hell out of our faces!

Bea rolls her eyes at the stupidity most people display.

Bea:  Now let me turn my attention to the dumb ass comments people make that Bill is racist just because he doesn’t believe all the things everyone else believes. First let me state if Bill was a racist he wouldn’t be married to me, an Asian from the Philippines, right? So your first item is debunked. Second Bill has in his family people who are White, Black, Asian, Hispanic, or a combination of two or more of those mentioned and Bill treats all his family members with equal respect and dignity so your second item is debunked. Third you need to know that there is there is only one person on the planet Bill detests and discriminates against and that is his half-brother Chris Shipman. That’s because it was Chris Shipman who killed their sister. After Chris got convicted of her death he has been trying to kill Bill. After nearly ten years Bill is still alive and well and Chris Shipman hasn’t been heard from again. Please take your ignorant comments, your biased opinions, and your hatred for Bill, to the city dump because the only place your comments belong is in the trash heaps in the dump.

With those comments out of the way Bea returns to comments related to their upcoming match at Climax Control 301.

BOTTOM LINE IS WE WIN AND YOU TWO LOSE

Bea:  When it comes to wrestling both myself and Bill always give 100 percent in every match. We never hold back and we never give less than 100 percent. Maybe we haven’t won as many matches, and Championships, as some of you have but when we were assigned to matches, we gave the fans a great show and often more of a performance than they expected and most assuredly a better performance than most of the rest of you on the Roster provide. With this first defense of our Mixed Tag Team Championship we will, again, go all out, give 100 percent, and leave the match as the winners and with the Mixed Tag Team Championship in our possession. Try to debunk that all you want but the fact remains that we are the Mixed Tag Team Champions, you two are not, and you’ll not be Mixed Tag Team Champions after we defeat you. Have a nice time leading up to our match because there will be no more nice times for you two after we destroy your wrestling careers.

Bea gives the CUT sign to the camera person and they call into the Network to inform them they are cutting their camera feed. When they cut their camera feed the Network is quick to return to regularly scheduled programming.

138

Supercard Archives / Re: KATE and TEDDY (c) vs THE BARNHARTS - MIXED TAG TITLES

« on: May 19, 2021, 03:41:16 PM »

*Senor Vinnie used by permission*

BEFORE AND AFTER

Narrator:  Hi and welcome to another edition of “Bill Barnhart tells you the truth and you have to deal with it!” Enjoy!

We switch scenes and see Bill is in the hotel room where he and Bea are staying. Apparently the camera person hasn’t yet informed Bill that they have turned on their camera and they are broadcasting as Bill is laughing hysterically and gasping for breath due to the overwhelming laughing. We see Bill sit on the couch, roll around on the couch, drop to the floor and roll around, all the time laughing hard and continuously. The camera person calls over to Bill to let him know they are broadcasting and Bill manages to regain control and stop laughing. He stands  up then walks over to the couch where he takes a seat. Bill looks into the camera and comments.

Bill:  I owe you an explanation of why I was in uncontrollable laughter. The other day I received a call from Senior Vinnie. Vinnie told me when he wins his King For The Day match he’ll offer me the position of Court Jester. It’ll be a combination of helping guests relax and, laugh a little bit. The side benefit of being Vinnie’s Court Jester is if anyone gets rude or out of control I get to whack them in the head with my Jester Scepter. WHAP!!! Har har har!!! Then on top of that I had laughter left over from listening to the nonsense that Kate and Teddy spewed forth recently. They would have been better off to keep their mouths shut and remain silent than to talk and talk and talk and prove to the world they’re morons. Har har har!!!

With those comments Bill relaxes a bit to give comments on his upcoming match.

Bill:  Welcome to another edition of I tell the truth about my opponents and everyone has to accept it. For the benefit of Teddy and Kate I wish to state that when you defeated Black Sheep for the Mixed Tag Team Championship had it been the team of Kris and Mikah you would not have defeated them. The fact that Coby was sent in as a replacement, when Kris Ryans became World Champion and dropped his half of the Mixed Tag Team Championship, is all the information needed to know our team is the superior team in this match.

Bill presents a large smile into the camera.

Bill:  Teddy do you know what you and Kate represent to me? You remind me of two yappy Chihuahua dogs. . .all bark and no bite. You two can pose in front of the camera and look cute if you want to but I’m here to show you what you two will look like BEFORE and AFTER our match. I’ll have the Network put up the first graphic.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE BEFORE IMAGE

The first graphic comes on the screen and what we see is a nice looking cute Chihuahua dog.

Bill:  You two smile into the camera looking like a nice looking cute Chihuahua dog. After me and Bea get done beating you down this next graphic shows you what you’ll look like. I’ll have the Network put up the second graphic.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE AFTER IMAGE

The second graphic comes on the screen and what we see is a Chihuahua dog that is so ugly that we have to turn away rather than look at it.

Bill:  So here are the BEFORE and AFTER images for you in our match. You’ll come into the match looking like nice cute Chihuahua dogs and you’ll leave looking like twisted pieces of shit Chihuahua dogs because me and Bea are going to destroy you beyond recognition. Us, on the other hand, come into the match as Handsome Bill Barnhart and Beautiful Bea Barnhart and we’ll leave our match as Handsome Bill Barnhart and Beautiful Bea Barnhart the newly crowned Mixed Tag Team Champions. And if. . .

Bill is interrupted when there is a loud knocking on his hotel room door. Bea comes out from the other room and answers the door and we see their friend and tag team partner Senor Vinnie. We are surprised to see Vinnie wearing a kingly long red royal mantle (a King’s robe) that has white trim, and Vinnie is also wearing a very fancy crown on his head and a jewel covered scepter in his hand. Bea invites Vinnie into the room and we can tell Bill and Bea are surprised.

Bill:  Uh, Vinnie, what is going on? Why are you dressed like a King?

Vinnie:  Because at Into The Void X I’m in a King For The Day match against Austin James Mercer, Cassian Reed, and Agostino Romano. When I win the match I become King For The Day so I felt it was appropriate to start dressing the part of the King.

Bill:  Okay but you haven’t won the match yet. I was in the middle of presenting comments for our match at Into The Void X but since you’re here was there something you needed from us or did you drop by just to show us your King outfit?

Vinnie:  I have numerous reasons to visit you today. Since your comments today was BEFORE AND AFTER I wanted to show you and your viewers the AFTER version of Senior Vinnie, which is King Vinnie, after I win the King For The Day match. That’s why I came here dressed as the King I will soon become.

Bill:  That makes sense. What else do you have?

Vinnie:  You mentioned that I told you when I become King I will appoint you as my Court Jester and I wanted to publicly state what you said is true. As my Court Jester you  would do a great job to entertain visitors, make them relax and laugh, and if they insult me you whack them in the head with your Jester Scepter or whatever else you can find to hit them with.

Bill:  Don’t know about making people laugh but I’ll make sure Kate and Teddy cry when our team defeats their team. Do you also plan positions in your kingdom for Bea and Iris?

Vinnie:  Bea will be appointed as Princess Bea and she will be the primary person to stand between me and my Queen and the common people. As for Iris I feel she could serve a valuable and useful purpose in my kingdom. Since so many of the common people who want to visit me are dirty flea-infested scum I’ll appoint Iris as the Official Greeter to meet and greet all guests. My thought is when these dirty flea-invested common people show up then when Iris meets and greets them most of their fleas will jump off them and onto Iris and she can run outside and dispose of the fleas.

Bea:  Princess Bea! Thanks Vinnie!

Bill:  Sounds like me and Bea have nice positions in your Kingdom but Iris will serve as a flea collector. Well flea spray and baths are for cleaning Iris so we’ll be fine. Is there anything else you have for us Vinnie?

As the words FLEA and BATH issue out of Bill’s mouth we see Iris walk up to King Vinnie and she starts sniffing his royal shoes. Liking the smell Iris decides to pee on King Vinnie’s shoes. Vinnie looks down with shock on his face.

Vinnie:  Bill! Look what Iris did to my royal shoes! I will have my shoes cleaned and send you the cleaning bill. You should control Iris better!

King Vinnie then swings his scepter and whacks Bill on top of the head.

WHAP!!!

Bill:  Ouch!!! What was that for?

Vinnie:  For not keeping an eye on Iris and allowing her to pee on my royal shoes!

Bill:  Will Iris still get her position in your Court?

Vinnie:  Of course she will. I always need someone, or something, to divert the fleas away from me.

Bill:  Do you have anything else for us Vinnie?

Vinnie:  Nothing more Bill. Thanks for accepting my upcoming appointments for you and Bea and Iris in my Kingdom. I have to go now since I have thousands of adoring fans waiting for me.

Vinnie turns and struts out of the hotel room and Bea closes the door once Vinnie is in the hallway.

Bea:  Never a dull moment with Vinnie eh? Just when you think you have Vinnie figured out he surprises you.

Bill:  Yep. Now I can get back to my comments for our match at Into The Void X.

Bill returns to facing the camera to give his closing comments.

Bill:  My final comments for Teddy and Kate are simple. I want you two to enter our match knowing you’ll lose the Mixed Tag Team Championship to us. I want you two to enter our match knowing you’ll get beat down hard by us. I want you two to leave our match as losers by accepting your loss to us. Thanks for joining me today. I’m done with my comments so you can cut the camera feed now.

At that final comment the camera person cuts their camera feed and our screen goes dark.

139

Supercard Archives / Re: KATE and TEDDY (c) vs THE BARNHARTS - MIXED TAG TITLES

« on: May 19, 2021, 03:38:48 PM »

KARMA IS ONLY A BITCH IF YOU ARE

Narrator:  Karma is a bitch!

The scene opens with a shot of a sign concerning Karma.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE GRAPHIC

The scene switches back to Bea in her hotel room.

Bea:  Did you get that Kate? Karma is only a bitch if you are. However I’ve got news for you. The Karma I associate with is a bitch to others all the time. You’re walking into our match with a tag team partner who is not up to the task of defeating us. I know you don’t want to stay in the ring with me because you know I’ll defeat you for the Mixed Tag Team Championship. On the other hand you damn sure don’t want Teddy to get into the match against Bill because Bill will defeat Teddy for the Mixed Tag Team Championship. Well, shit, there ya go! You’re in a lose-lose situation and we’re in a win-win situation and that, Kate, is Karma being a bitch to you.

NOBODY APPRECIATES STUFF ANYMORE

Bea:  I hear of lot of wrestlers in Sin City Wrestling bitch, moan, and complain about everything. They push themselves at other wrestlers and demand that other wrestlers help them be successful in the sport of wrestling. Me and Bill don’t play that crap because we don’t need the help or association of ungrateful people. Yes we have tried helping others with their wrestling careers and most of them turned out to be assholes who didn’t appreciate that we were trying to help them. We finally got sick of people asking us for assistance because after we gave them assistance, they turned on us. That’s why you see us only associating with Senor Vinnie at this time.

Bea takes a quick drink break then she returns to her comments.

BACK TO KARMA

Bea:  I mentioned Karma earlier in my statements and I wish to return to commenting on Karma. There’s three types of Karma. The first is that in some cultures they believe when you die Karma evaluates you and then sends you back to be reincarnated into either another human being or an animal. Karma makes the decision to either slam dunk you into a horrible existence or reward you for all you did in your previous life. For the purpose of commenting on our upcoming match against Kate and Teddy this type of Karma doesn’t apply. The second Karma is one that evaluates your wrongful deeds and evil ways and then it waits until the timing is perfect and then Karma hits you when you least expect it. One example might be you mess someone up and Karma is ticked off at you. Then six months or so down the road you board a plane and the plane crashes mid-flight. That’s delayed Karma. That type of Karma also is not applicable to our match with Teddy and Kate. The third type of Karma is what is called Instant Karma and I’ll give you some examples.

Bea again takes a quick break for a drink of water then she returns to her comments.

Bea:  Let’s talk about Instant Karma. One example is that a robber mugs a woman and steals her purse and he runs away and runs across the street to be run over by a car, truck, or bus, and he dies or gets seriously injured and captured by the police. Another example might be one of your co-workers in a high-rise office building totally disrespects you in front of your other co-workers. Your disrespectful co-worker turns and gets into the elevator to take them to the ground floor. A few floors down the elevator malfunctions and the elevator car fee-falls and the braking mechanism on the elevator fails to activate and the elevator car slams into the ground floor either killing your disrespectful co-worker or seriously injuring them. Another type of Instant Karma is directed toward people who refuse to listen to others and then what you told those people who refuse to listen comes to pass they get upset over it. You can’t get upset over something that happens when you were warned that it would happen.

Bea breaks and drinks the remaining water. She closes the top of the water bottle then tosses it over her shoulder where it lands neatly in the trash can.

Bea:  So for Teddy and Kate it comes down to Instant Karma is going to beat you down, kick you while you’re down, and throw you two into the trash. Yes you heard me correctly. Instant Karma hasn’t been enjoying your disrespectful comments and actions so it’ll deliver justice upon you when me and Bill beat you down hard and walk away as the newly crowned Mixed Tag Team Champions. You cannot change what Instant Karma has for you so please just accept it and move along. Thanks for joining me today for my comments on our upcoming match.

When Bea is done with her comments the camera person calls into the Network to inform them that Bea’s comments are done. The Network quickly switches to regularly scheduled programming.

140

Supercard Archives / Re: KATE and TEDDY (c) vs THE BARNHARTS - MIXED TAG TITLES

« on: May 14, 2021, 09:33:17 AM »

KATE AND TEDDY ARE TOTAL BULLSHIT

Narrator:  Bill Barnhart is presenting comments today to inform you how full of shit the team of Teddy Warren and Kate Steele are.

The scene changes and we see Bill Barnhart relaxing in a dining area inside the hotel. Bill is casually dressed in blue jeans, sneakers, and a blue pull-over shirt.

Bill:  Hi and welcome to my presentation. Today I’m going to prove how full of shit Teddy Warren and Kate Steele are. Here on the table I have what is affectionately called a Bullshit Meter. Before the camera came on I read into the Bullshit Meter all the crap Kate and Teddy have spewed forth and I’m here to show you what the Bullshit Meter is reading.

Bill asks the camera person to get a shot of the Bullshit Meter.

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE BULLSHIT METER

Bill:  As you clearly see the Bullshit Meter went all the way to the highest level on the scale which is TOTAL BULLSHIT. That’s all the proof you need to realize that Teddy and Kate were lucky to defeat Black Sheep because Kris Ryans had to back out of the Mixed Tag Team because he became World Champion and he was replaced by Coby Quik. Without a doubt had you two faced Mikah and Kris, instead of Mikah and Coby,  you would not be Mixed Tag Team Champions at this time. I’ll make a prediction. After our match on Sunday, March 23, 2021, at Into The Void X, you’ll no longer be the Mixed Tag Team Champions.

The Network takes down the graphic and at the same time the serving staff brings Bill’s food order to the table.

Bill:  Oh yeah! A burger, fries, a slice of pepperoni pizza, and a glass of Classic Coke! I’m good! So, Teddy and Kate, how does it feel to be full of shit and as useless as a screen door on a submarine? How does it feel for you two being as helpless as a person who took a Diarrhea dump in a bathroom only to find out there’s no toilet paper available? How does it feel to know that when you managed to squeak the win for the Mixed Tag Team Championship that you didn’t win against the best team out there since you didn’t face Mikah and Kris? Having to face Mikah and Coby, which is half the quality of the team of Kris and Mikah is not a situation you should be bragging about. Now you face me and Bea and our team is twice the quality and ability as you two. Have fun dreaming about me and Bea walking away from our match as Mixed Tag Team Champions. For now those are just concepts in your dreams but at Into The Void X me and Bea will make those dreams a reality when we walk away as Mixed Tag Team Champions.

Bill gives a stern look into the camera.

APPRECIATE STUFF

Bill:  Most wrestlers whine, bitch, moan, and complain about everything. They approach other wrestlers and request help with their wrestling careers. Me and Bea were, and the key word here is WERE, always willing to help but we stopped helping due to those wrestlers we helped being ungrateful and sarcastic to us after we helped them. Me and Bea don’t ask for help from others because we don’t need the help or association with ungrateful people. Yes we have tried helping others with their wrestling careers but most of them were assholes who didn’t appreciate what we were trying to help them accomplish. We got sick of people asking us for assistance, then when we gave them assistance, they turned on us. That’s why we only associate with Senor Vinnie at this time.

Bill smiles into the camera.

Bill: Before I make my closing comments I would like to make comments to show people that we pay attention. I’ve done my research and I see that you, Kate, are not a total loser as you have held a few Championships in Sin City Wrestling. We’re also aware that you, Teddy, managed to somehow hold two Championships here. When my team defeats you, destroys you, and humiliates you, at Into The Void X you’ll both be re-classified as total losers.

Bill gives a wink into the camera.

Bill:  For the benefit of Teddy and Kate I want to ask you to appreciate stuff instead of being sarcastic about everything. Appreciate the fact that due to the substitution of Coby Quik on team Black Sheep you two were able to pull off a win you would not have pulled off had Kris Ryans been on their tag team. Appreciate the fact that you were able to hold the Mixed Tag Team Championship for a little over thirty days before losing it to us. Appreciate the fact that even though me and Bea are more than capable of ending your wrestling careers we’ll be satisfied to just beat you down, win the match, and accept possession of the Mixed Tag Team Championship Belts. If you don’t want to appreciate these things then so be it. No matter if you accept and appreciate these things you’ll still lose the match, and the Mixed Tag Team Championship, to me and Bea. Thanks for watching today so I could inform and enlighten you.

The camera person places their camera into a slow fade-out. As the scene is slowly fading out we watch as Bill addresses the food on the table and he dives into the food enjoying and appreciating it to the max. The scene finally fades out and our screen goes black.

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