The confusion of life.
New York, New York
5 Years Ago
It was a horrible day. Not just in emotional feeling but also the weather and mood. The black clouds hungover and opened up pouring rain. Black clad figures stood around an open grave. The casket sitting above it ready to be lowered as the priest read his words slowly from his gilded bible. But the words all drowned out. They were hollow, empty in meaning and impact. The rain got a little harder as he finished, a black umbrella over his head to protect the precious religious text.
He felt numb. Like something was stolen from inside his body, ripped out and left bare. A gaping hole. His bright brown eyes looking over the casket as it started to set in, he was never going to see her again. He was never going to hear her laugh, see her smile. Feel her give him a hug. That had all ended. It was never going to return. The emotion welled up, a tear slid down his cheek as the sadness turned to anger. The anger swelled and turned in his stomach filling the gaping hole If the love he had was gone and empty he had now found something to fill it.
His hands closed into fists, almost everyone else had started to separate and walk away as the casket lowered into the ground. Then, a hand clasped down on his shoulder. ”Man, I’m so sorry Landon….” Austin sighed as his hand kept on his friends shoulder. Landon McMillian had trained with Austin, they had attended the same private school and had become close friends. But now, they stood together and watched as Landon’s sister Emily was put to peace.
”I just, I don’t get it. She was so happy when I last saw her, why did she do this?” His voice trembled as the anger seemed to wash away and give way to something else. It wasn’t sadness, it was guilt. Austin knew the pitch and tone very well. He turned and looked at his own sister Amy, she looked at the casket getting lowered and leaned down to throw a red rose into the grave. ”If she’d only talked to me...I could have stopped her…”
”No...no you couldn’t” Landon slowly turned to look up at Austin who shook his head with a deep sigh. ”You said it yourself. Last time you talked to her. She sounded happy. She hid it from you. She wanted to be set free. You can’t blame yourself.” He shot a small smile at his friend. Landon gave a nod and even though it wasn’t much, even though Austin could still see the guilt in his eyes it had gone down from where it was. Austin had been able to alleviate some of his pain. The two men embraced and Landon turned to talk to his mother. Austin signalled to Amy as the two walked back towards the car.
”Thanks for being here. Emily didn’t have many friends, she was really introverted. You helped show support” They moved between different tombstones and statues getting to the road heading towards the small parking lot out the front of the cemetery.
Amy took a deep breath and stopped as they walked through the gate.”Did you ever think you’d be doing this?...burying me?”
The question caught Austin off guard. He stopped dead in his tracks and slid his hands into his pockets while raising his eyebrows. ”Honestly?. I don’t know. There was a time, just after I got you out of the hospital. I was afraid.” His voice lowered as he stepped closer to his sister. ”You were so hurt and shut off. I was scared that I would wake up to find you dead in your room…”
”I thought about it…”
The moment of honesty shook him, Amy swallowed hard and continued. ”You got me out, but the world was weird to me, different. I sat in there and thought about just, ending it. But you were there. Always there.” She smiled and leaned forward hugging her younger brother, squeezing him tight. Austin let out a sigh of relief and gave her a pat on the back.
”You don’t have to feel that way anymore. You have a family Amy.” She smiled and gave him a nod as they both started moving towards the car, and the sun peeked through the dark clouds.
Last week….
Austin paced back and forth in the waiting room, his hands going from his pockets to folding over his chest and back again. Lisa, his wife of three years and their two children sat together on the cushioned bench outside the birthing suite. Lisa held their daughter in her arms while their son kicked his legs happily. They had been here a few hours, Amy having gone into labour in the early hours of the morning. Austin sighed and put his arms over his head.
Lisa chuckled to herself and piped up. ”Is this what you were like when I was giving birth?” Austin smiled and shook his head.
”No, way worse, but atleast I was able to come in and hold your hand closer to the end of it.” Lisa gave a small nod and a smile, Austin paced back and forth a little more and then looked down at Lisa who was humming a tune to Michelle. He shook his head and smiled slowly running his fingertips over her head. ”How can you be so calm? Amy is giving birth to your nephew in there”
She chuckled and sighed heavily. ”I’ve been through it twice Aus, when you go through it, well, it’s scary, but its also life. It’s what we go through to have kids. Amy is strong...it’ll be ok…” He took a long drawn out breath relaxing his body, she was right of course, Lisas knew how stressed everything had made Austin. From Amy coming back into his life, to finding out she was pregnant and the father had run off…
But he was there for his sister.
Family meant everything to Austin, he had his sister, his wife, his kids and all his friends. The other members of wolfslair were his brothers and sisters. But this, this still scared him. Lisa reached up grabbing his hand, she squeezed it to get his attention, he looked up to see the suite door open, the doctor poked his head out with a smile calling immediate family in. She was safe, his newborn nephew was safe…..and Austin finally felt at ease.
Jack’d the ripper? Jack’d off?
Austin James Mercer, the current SCW Internet Champion smiled wide, he was on top of the world. He had last week off, the return following Into the void. But now Austin was back and he was booked in a non title match.
”Look who is still the Sin City Wrestling Internet champion. And I hate to say “I told you so”: but I really did. See, Bill Barnhart was tough, he earned a shot, he brought his best. And I will give him credit for being a great challenger and bringing out the best in me and giving me a challenge. But, I kept the Internet title for many reasons, one of which being, I couldn’t let this title be handled by a man like him. Now, that isn’t saying Bill hasn’t earned some form of respect in Sin City Wrestling and all the other places he’s gone..”
“But, what I will say is that you look at Bill, with his stupid goatee, his pot belly, horrible fashion sense and wildly “old school” aesthetic, does not fit in with this whole deal. See, this title needs a strong, consistent champion, who will step up to any and all challenges with the same vigor and emotion. And that...is not Bill Barnhart…”
“I am one of the best professional wrestlers on this planet today and I prove it everywhere nI go with everything I do. I proved it with the WWH Hellsgate title, I proved it in Honor and when I became the Honor world champion, I proved it when I became the Sin city world heavyweight champion. And I am proving it with this…”
“I am proving it in and out of the ring. And, I don’t want to climb to the top and be alone. I have never wanted to look at myself as the best of the best and feel that I was the only one. Ben Jordan, Griffin Hawkins, Alex Jones. They are names of professional wrestlers in this company that I hold as peers. I held Fenris in the same regard and then...well...I also hold..Senor Vinnie there…”
He pauses for a moment laughing to himself before clearing his throat.
”Vinnie wanted my attention when he attacked me after my title defence, and as I said with Christina on Climax Control, if Vinnie wanted a shot, all he had to do was ask. But instead he made a statement. And in professional wrestling making statements is important. So while I know Vinnie will be looking at me, watching and studying, I have decided that I need to make my own statements.
“Now, aside from doing, what I have already done and being one of the best champions this company has ever seen, I am going to do this the old fashioned way.”
“I am going to walk down to that ring on Climax Control and beat the snot out of my opponent…”
“Simple no?”
“But, what makes this interesting is that I am going to go one on one with a man who is almost an unknown quantity in Sin City Wrestling. Indeed both Mark and Christian have no idea who signed him or why he’s here and his first appearance was shocking while also doing very little to damage his aura despite a loss, it was against a guy who has held gold in SCW and someone who I believe is underrated. Lachlan Kane...but Jack is….mysterious…”
Austin raises an eyebrow and smiles wide.
”What do we really know about him?”
“He has an affinity for a 19th century victorian england serial killer to the point where his name is inspired by it and he’s from Whitechapel. Apparently. He lost to Lachlan, he appears and disappears more than Christina Zdunich’s vanity, and he’s bigger than me. Not alot to go on. But Jack, I just want to say I am excited for this match because it is in fact one of the very few times I am facing someone bigger than me….”
“It doesn’t happen often. I mean, I’m six foot six, two hundred and sixty five pounds of muscle, good looks and dimples to fucking die for. And you Jack? Well, you’re two inches taller, eight pounds heavier and have great head full of dreadlocks. But, I have a history here. You like history right? Clearly you do since you’re ripping off one of the most vague serial killers in history while being vague yourself. I’m surprised you haven’t sent in random letters yet…”
“I wonder how close the obsession goes. Many thought Jack the ripper was a surgeon who was slowly going insane due to syphilis….not that I’m accusing you of having Syphilis….”
“I mean, Amanda Cortez isn’t in SCW anymore so the sexual disease ratio dropped to an all time low when she quit…”
“But what I am accusing you of is trying to use the Jack the ripper thing as a smokescreen to hide the fact the real you is probably boring as batshit. I mean come on, I’m not that exciting really but I’m a big enough smart ass to make people laugh and everyone, and I mean everyone loves to watch me throw people around like lawn darts...I might not be able to do that with you but something many people are missing is that while you are bigger than me I have always been more than just my size…”
“I’m also faster than most people give me credit for, I can mat wrestle, I can brawl, I can tie you up in submissions or I can punch you in the face, I can fly off the top rope. To put it bluntly Jack….I am the prototype of the modern day professional wrestler. I am a former and future world champion, I am a man who at Climax control needs to make a statement. And you?....well Jack...you will go from predator to pray….and when is all said and done...you’ll be the hooker...laying on the stone street…..”
