You have to learn to pace yourself
Pressure
You're just like everybody else
Pressure
You've only had to run so far
So good
But you will come to a place
Where the only thing you feel
Are loaded guns in your face
And you'll have to deal with
Pressure
Ah, yes....that familiar situation. Ok Elizabeth, you brought this shit on yourself and went boasting on twitter...
Put up or shut up time, woman.
In the gym for a long while since we got back from Ireland. We were there for a whole week, just to unwind from our crazy schedule but I’ve been slackin’. I don’t like to workout when I’m on vacation and now...I’m freaking out....a little....
....ok....a-fucking-lot. When I get like this, I throw myself into the situation to the point where it’s almost frenzy like. In college it was hours upon hours of reading and writing. Forgetting to eat, barely sleeping....I’ve been known to pull being up for 48 hours and living off of caffeine....and nothing but caffeine. It’s dangerous, it’s stupid and usually I end up sleeping for a whole day after I do it. Followed by a whole day of me eating.
......I need help.
“Well ain’t that the understatement of the century!”
I look down at a smirking Malachi who’s propped up just enough where he could see what I was writing, “And what have I told you about looking over my shoulder when I’m writing?” as I’m closing my book “It’s getting to a point with you, I’m gonna need to keep a spray bottle nearby.”
“And watch how fast that bitch gets chucked if you do, love” he says with some laughter in his eyes. He kisses my shoulder “You really need to get some rest, I know you got this crazy notion in your head about overworking yourself but it won’t do you any good in a ring to be physically exhausted and you know it.”
“I know....and believe me, I have tried in vain....after a while my eyelids hurt from forcing them shut,” I put the book down on the side and scooch down in bed a bit. “Just still a bit in shock about how...fast this is all going for me. First it was a Hall of Famer and now a champion.”
“Non-title match love...no pressure.” he says rather dismissively.
I just glare at him, “Bullsh-” and before I can even finish he just kisses me.
“Bells, you are a perfectionist. One of the few things that drives me absolutely bonkers but that is what drives you to be the best and I get that. But you are going to put yourself to the nuthouse putting all this pressure on yourself.”
I just sigh and curl up into him “I hate it when you’re right”
“I don’t get a victory like this very often so I’m just going to take it and shut up.” he says laughing wrapping his arms around me.
“By God, he can be taught....” laughing followed by me getting popped with the closest pillow he could get his hands on.
“Sassy. Never. Ends!” I finally get my hands on the pillow and snatch it from him.
“Then do something about it!”
.......we’ll save you from the rest of that....
You’re welcome.
You used to call me paranoid
Pressure
But even you can not avoid
Pressure
You turned the tap dance into your crusade
Now here you are with your faith
And your Peter Pan advice
You have no scars on your face
And you cannot handle pressure
I’m amazed this place is still standing. The hurricane messed up the Bahamas but they get use to it.....and rebuild....
“You ever seen The Truman Show? That scene where things go all crazy, they leave, turn around and come back and nothing is absolutely wrong? .....spookulur” I say looking down the beach. “So the last couple weeks I’ve kicked back and relaxed. Went on a trip that didn’t require a wrestling ring....though we somehow ended up in a place with a wrestling ring during our trip. I still can’t believe that I managed to beat Amy in the ring and heaven knows I learned a lot just being there. Apparently somewhere, somehow I’ve impressed someone. Not only do I have a match already for High Stakes but this week could lead to bigger things down the road. I kinda feel bad for Sam Marlowe. Here she is trying to prepare herself for her title defense and she’s in a constant battle, possibly looking at her next opponent after Bobbie....that’s if she can get past her. I thought I was a little nuts...well...I am. BUT! Possible challenger after possible challenger....for future defenses. Just yikes! But that is something you just deal with.”
“So Climax 250 is huge, there isn’t a lot of places that get to even 100 let alone 250 episodes and to have this be the go home to the High Stakes it makes it even bigger.” I just smile, “I look at it this way, if I keep making strides in all the right places by possibly beating Sam before her big defense, awesome...but I can’t help but wonder if I need to start looking over my shoulder. I know I gotta be pissing people off by now and I’m putting pressure on myself to only be better in the ring but also showing people that even though I’m still young in my career, I’m not going to back down from someone that wants to step to me. I’m actually kind’ve want it to happen, for some reason. I don’t want to cause problems because let’s face it, the Roulette Championship competition is pretty damn thick....and it’s used as almost a catapult to bigger things....like chances at Alicia and the Women’s Championship. Something that I’m not ready for....not yet anyways.”
I take a deep breath and look out to the ocean, “I’m not one to make waves....but I do love to influence them and if by some stroke up luck I manage to find my way to a win at 250 against a reigning champion like Sam Marlowe, then by all means I would love nothing more than a shot at it. I’m also putting pressure on myself day in and day out to be better and better. 6 months ago, I was just a college kid, not even sure what my next step was. But now, now it’s a challenge to see how many people I can truly shock by winning or even performing at my best. Mal was right, I am a perfectionist...” and I just sigh, “And I won’t settle for second place. If that takes points off my humble meter then fucking let it. But sometimes, you have to draw the line somewhere...and winning at 250 and in Hawaii, that’s where the line was drawn, that’s the next line to jump. Whether Ms. Sam Marlowe likes it or not”
All grown up and no place to go
Psych 1, Psych 2
What do you know?
All your life is Channel 13
Sesame Street
What does it mean?
I'll tell you what it means
Pressure
Song that inspired the craziness: Billy Joel - Pressure
