IT IS A MENTAL GAME
NARRATOR: Climax Control 151 was nice for Dmitri and James Tuscini as the Tag Team known as The Unholy Alliance. They scored a win against Bad Company, consisting of Caleb Houston and Johnny Tsunami, when Dmitri pinned Houston. The night started off badly for Uncle Pinky though. He was kidnapped by Sicilian Mafia goons and later in the evening Chris Shipman “purified” Pinky with a lashing. This coming Climax Control 152 James Tuscini faces off against a Seven Deadly Sins Stable member Despayre. Without further ado I turn the air time over to James Tuscini.
The scene shifts to James Tuscini in the Harvey’s Outdoor Arena in Lake Tahoe, Nevada. James is sitting by himself in his dressing room as Uncle Pinky is nowhere in sight. James is wearing blue jeans, a black pullover shirt, and black athletic shoes.
JAMES TUSCINI: The match against Bad Company went the way we expected it to with the only exception being that Joshua Acquin decided to make a scene to get back at Bad Company for a previous attack against him. Of course Bad Company is going to use that as the reason they lost to us. They will claim that Joshua distracted them otherwise they would have won the match. If you allow yourself to be distracted in a match and you lose then you have nobody to blame but yourself.
James glances around the room before focusing into the camera again.
JAMES TUSCINI: As you can see Uncle Pinky is not with me this week. You saw what Chris Shipman and his goons did to Uncle Pinky by having Sicilian Mafia punks kidnap him and then whipping the poor old guy. I gave Uncle several weeks off, until the first card in August, to allow him time to recover. Although I should feel sorry for Uncle Pinky I will admit that he should have never continued to claim he was in the Sicilian Mafia as they don’t like pretenders. I love Uncle Pinky to the maximum but the mugging was coming to him but the lashes Shipman gave him could have been avoided. That said I assure you that once Uncle Pinky recovers and returns to my corner that he will get revenge upon Shipman and it won’t be something you want your kids to see.
James takes a drink of water and just as he is ready to continue with his comments his cell phone rings. Tuscini puts the call on speaker so that everyone can hear the conversation so nobody will make stuff up about what was said.
JAMES TUSCINI: Hi Uncle! How are you doing there in San Francisco?
UNCLE PINKY: I will recover soon enough but that lashing Shipman gave me hurt like hell. I can’t wait to get my hands on that jerk!
JAMES TUSCINI: Uncle I’ve had long talks with Bill Barnhart and I can tell you that Shipman dogged his half-brother from here to eternity trying to destroy him. The more Barnhart fought back against Shipman the more Chris did to torture Bill. He even went after Bill’s English Bulldog Iris and Bill’s wife Lupe. Iris was so traumatized by Shipman that whenever Bill mentioned the name Chris Shipman or Uncle Chris poor Iris would lose her bladder and pee all over the place or worse. So, Uncle, I suggest you leave things alone for now anyway. The more you try to instigate stuff against Shipman the more he will go after our family and friends.
UNCLE PINKY: You know how I am James. It will be hard for me to see Shipman and not want to castrate him with a rusty dull knife. I could ask some of my Sicilian Mafia friends to…
JAMES TUSCINI: Stop right there Uncle! Claiming you are in the Sicilian Mafia is worse than actually being in the Mafia and in a rival faction. Those goons Shipman sent after you at Climax Control 151 were real Sicilian Mafia members. I checked it out. I will say this for Shipman. Although he’s mentally unstable, and possibly certifiably insane, and he is madder than the Mad Hatter in Alice in Wonderland, he does a lot of legitimate things and those Sicilian Mafia thugs were the real deal. Stop claiming to be in the Sicilian Mafia and don’t go after Shipman yet. Wait until he does something where he gets in your way and then you can strike. Are you sure you are healing okay Uncle?
UNCLE PINKY: I’m okay. It just takes time to heal completely from what I went through last Sunday. Also Sandy stops by daily to see how I’m doing and she’s been so nice to clean my wounds and dress them again. She’s a great one James and you need to put a ring on her finger and keep her in your life.
JAMES TUSCINI: Let’s allow things with the relationship to move forward at a pace that is comfortable for everyone. I know I have a special woman in Sandy. Talk to you later Uncle.
James ends the call and then he continues with his comments.
JAMES TUSCINI: This Sunday at Climax Control 152 I face off against a Stable Mate of Chris Shipman’s in the Seven Deadly Sins Stable. I will be facing off against Despayre. Under normal circumstances he would be able to last about 10 to 15 minutes with me even though I am 9 inches taller and almost 100 pounds heavier than he is. Despayre suffered a head injury facing off against J2H recently so I’m surprised he is assigned to this match. Then again Despayre would not be cleared to wrestle in this match if the Doctors didn’t feel he was able to perform without suffering permanent and career-ending injuries against me. If the Doctors cleared him to wrestle then I’m not going to hold back on Despayre. With his previous head injury, and not enough time has passed for him to have made a full recovery, if he lasts in the ring more than 5 minutes, and even as long as 10 minutes, I would be surprised. However when you have the likes of Synn, Gabriel, Rage, and Shipman as part of the Stable I already know that there will be so much interference. It will be a match where every time I get my hands on Despayre and start beating the life out of him that one of his Stable-mates will jump into the match to pull me off him and get a few cheap shots in while they are at it. Sure I will have Dmitri in my corner but having a match that is likely to turn into a 5-on-2 affair doesn’t appear as if it will go well for me.
Tuscini strikes a pose as if he is thinking hard about something and then his face lights up as though he has found the answer.
JAMES TUSCINI: This match is a win-win situation for me and a lose-lose situation for Despayre. I have absolutely nothing to lose in this match while Despayre has so much to lose I’m surprised he actually signed for this match. Why is that you ask? Because my Roulette Title Belt is not on the line and if I end up getting beat down due to overwhelming interference by The Seven Deadly Sins Stable it will either end up with Despayre being Disqualified due to the interference or it will degrade his cheap win even more due to everyone on the planet calling them out for being cowards. Therefore you can see that even if I end up losing the match due to interference on the part of Despayre I come out of the match a winner. Even if Despayre wins with cheating and interference he will come out of the match a loser. So what can you expect me to do in this match? I cannot give away all my strategy secrets now can I? No I won’t do something that stupid. However I will tell you that if I came to the ring with a prior arm injury I would expect my opponent to focus on that arm to make me wear down quickly. If I came into the ring with a prior leg injury I would expect my opponent to focus on that leg until I was incapacitated. And if I came into the match with a prior, and recent, head injury I would expect my opponent to focus on my head to deliver as much damage as they could until I get worn down for the pinfall or I submit or I get knocked out. With what I just said what do you think I will do in our match this Sunday? RIGHT! Work on the head of Despayre until he quickly wears down, he submits, or he goes unconscious and I win the match.
James stands up and he walks around the couch to where he stops behind the couch placing his hands on the top of the back of the couch.
JAMES TUSCINI: Despayre, our match is a Standard Rules match as I see it booked. It is not a No Disqualification match so you can be Disqualified for anyone in your Stable interfering in the match, or if you try to attack me with Skittles, a Teddy Bear, or a spork. This is not a Pinfalls Count Anywhere match so you have to remain in the ring or risk being counted out if you stay outside the ring to get away from me. Come to think of it that might be your best strategy. Stay outside of the ring and get counted out. You lose the match but you save yourself added injury especially to your head. However should our Referee be the dumbest Referee the wrestling world has ever seen, and they don’t see the interference, or they don’t count you outside the ring properly, and I get attacked by your Stable-mates and lose the match your entire Stable will be punished severely for what happened and a formal complaint will be filed against the Referee of our match. And I promise you, that if you have inference from your Stable members or you cheat during the match then retribution that my friends and family and I dish out on you and your Stable will be so horrific that in the movie industry it would be rated X on the movie rating chart due to extreme violence and bloodshed.
James walks from around the couch to the front of it where he sits down on the couch.
JAMES TUSCINI: Despayre I know it was Chris Shipman who did the dirty deed against Uncle Pinky otherwise how else did he end up in Shipman’s possession? However you are in the same Stable with him and that makes you guilty as an accomplice. Should I take out my anger against Shipman on you in our match? Sure! Why not? Beating you down and hurting you would probably drive Shipman more insane than if it was him I was beating down and hurting. Psychological injury is way more damaging than physical injury. My only concern is that if I damage you enough during our match that you are unable to wrestle any longer will everyone congratulate me or condemn me? I honestly don’t see how anyone can condemn me for hurting you because you signed for this match, you had the Doctor clear you for this match, and Management accepted your signature and the Doctor’s clearance certificate, so I will treat you the same as I treat all my opponents. How is that? I treat you like the victim you are. You are the mouse and I am the mouse trap. You are the cockroach and I am the Roach Motel. You are the patient in the mental institution and I am Nurse Ratched.
Tuscini leans back into the couch and he kicks his feet up on the coffee table.
JAMES TUSCINI: You know what Despayre? Having the type of head injury you suffered against J2H and being out of action for a long time you shouldn’t have signed for this match. You should have your head examined for accepting this match with me. Oh, wait, you DID have your head examined by the Doctor and he said he would clear you to wrestle this Sunday. Either the Doctor is an idiot, or a Quack, or both, because when he placed his signature on the clearance certificate for you to wrestle he put the final nail in your coffin to use a figure of speech. And if you think all your Seven Deadly Sins stable mates are going to save you from my wrath you need to take a different line of thought. You may think I only have Dmitri in my corner but actually there are many more standing behind me to negate everything your Stable attempts before, during, or after our match. There’s only so much your chicken shit Stable-mates can do before those backing me up neutralize them and then it is just you and me to finish our match. And when the bell rings to end the match, and the dust settles, it will be me with my hand raised in victory and my name announced as the winner of the match, while you lie on the mat receiving emergency medical care from Paramedics. Don’t believe me Despayre? You will believe this Sunday evening.
James informs the cameraman his comments for this segment are done. The cameraman cuts his feed and the Network quickly switches over to a commercial break.
