“Achilles, Achilles, Achilles come down…
Won’t you get up off, get up off the roof?”
There comes a time when you look back reflecting upon the decades you’ve spent on this spinning God forsaken rock. And you only have a limited amount of time...to make that rock remember your name for the rest of its existence. Was your legacy enough to last? Did you leave...EVERYTHING you could into whatever you loved? Did you...make an impact?
DO YOU KNOW...WHO YOU ARE!?(The scene opens to a bustling stately manor as various unknowns are running around frantically. There’s Levi’s over dramatic 9 year old daughter raises the back of her hand to her forehead like Scarlet O’Hara.)
Rosie Russow: MOTHER I SIMPLY CANNOT FIND MY *BEST* CARDIGAN!!!
(We see a striking woman, probably mid-to-late 30’s stick her head out of the kitchen. This is Levi’s wife, Emma.)
Emma Russow: It’s in the dryer dear! You left it where Pongo could get ahold of it again!
Rosie Russow: PONGO!? Oh the BETRAYAL!!!
Emma Russow: Just...get a move on. Charlie, honey. Could you put the book down for a moment and get ready for school?
(We see the scene fly down the hall to a rather large library where Rosie’s twin brother Charlie, an autistic savant with a near genius IQ, is hanging upside down off the sofa with his face turning red but still buried in the book. Suddenly, our hero...The Iceman Levi Russow enters the scene and pats his leg making Charlie sit up.)
Levi Russow: Time for school, bud.
Charlie Russow: I stay in school, father.
Levi Russow: What were you doing anyway?
Charlie Russow: I was reading a book on how to learn Kanji and I wondered if I’d process it better with my neural processors under duress.
Levi Russow: Uh…..huh. And how’d that go?
Charlie Russow: Results were inconclusive pending parental intervention.
Levi Russow: Meaning...ME, right?
Charlie Russow: Affirmative. Father...can I ask you a question?
Levi Russow: No you and Rosie are not adopted, yes I’m just stupid. Is that what you wanted me to know?
Charlie Russow: Father! I would NEVER insult you so viciously! I am aware you may not know the atomic weight of an element, 39 by the way, I recognize everything you’ve done to provide and keep us safe at the cost of traditional habitual bonding.
(With that Charlie looks like he wants to hug his dad but instead he just...pats him on the shoulder and rushes off to his room. Levi chuckles a bit before standing up and walking into the foyer where the children are bustling to their designated rooms to Zoom call their teachers. Suddenly the entire house is quiet. Levi and Emma stand looking at each other. Neither one says anything, she just throws her arms around his neck and kisses him passionately.)
Emma Russow: Hey sexy, nice ass!
Levi Russow: You wanna talk about a nice ass?
(Levi playfully spanks Emma as she squeaks in surprise as she smiles, smacks his chest, and kisses him again. They pull away holding on to each other, pressing their foreheads together and closing their eyes just...drinking in each other’s presence. Once they raise their heads and look at each other. Emma looks into Levi’s now concerned eyes.)
Emma Russow: ...no...I know that look.
Levi Russow: Em...just hear me out.
Emma Russow: NO! EVERY TIME a new generation comes out YOU get this wild hair up your ass even in your 40’s! What do you have to prove!?
Levi Russow: That I was the best there ever was!
(Levi lets go of her and starts to walk towards his study as she gives chase to him, grabbing his arm and whipping him around.)
Emma Russow: You have more money than 500 men make in a lifetime, you’ve got THREE TROPHY ROOMS...so WHAT? WHAT is it!?
Levi Russow: Emma it’s just all I know, okay!
(Levi runs his fingers through his hair as he sits on his desk.)
Levi Russow: ...my 9 year old son just “no offense’d me after ONCE AGAIN going on a tangent I couldn’t understand. There’s no way in HELL I identify with Rosie-
Emma Russow: Debatable.
Levi Russow: But I saw...a Russow...walk into that company, win one title, lose it immediately, and run away. This name isn’t a name anymore...it’s a brand. And I can’t have my name remembered like that.
Emma Russow: Jack did his best!
Levi Russow: I’m not saying he didn’t! I’m saying...you know I’ve wanted one last shot. And aside from my boys and girls I have there? I have never locked horns with a single person on that roster and the itch...the possible matches...it just CHILLS me!
(Emma walks up to him and takes his hands kissing his forehead.)
Emma Russow: Just promise me...it’ll be different this time.
Levi Russow: What do you mean, my love?
Emma Russow: Every time you throw yourself into your work you forget to take care of your mental and physical health and you go...dark.
(Levi kisses her hands.)
Levi Russow: Love I promise you that will NEVER...happen again.
Emma Russow: ...okay. But if you’re gonna do this, you better bring Mama some more presents for the trophy room!
Levi Russow: Heh...yes ma’am!
(Levi and Emma kiss as the scene pans backwards and the door closes.)
-Alone In A Room-
“All I needed was the last thing I wanted…
To sit alone in a room...and say it all out loud.
Every moment, every second, every trespass…
Every awful thing...every broken dream.”
(We open to show the inside of...the Georgia Aquarium? We see various shots of families enjoying looking at the various wildlife. A child marvels as a stingray flaps overhead in the underground tunnel. Until we reach an extremely dark hallway and as we’re heading down it all of a sudden out of NOWHERE a cell phone lights up illuminating the face of Levi Russow nearly giving the cameraman a heart attack. Levi simply holds up a finger to his lips and shushes him as they slowly traverse on until we reach the deepest, bluest (my hat look like a shark fin) shark enclosure.)
Levi Russow: Look at that...fascinating creatures aren’t they? Severely misunderstood if you ask me. Wait...sorry that was Hagrid! But the point still remains! They are streamlined evolution at its finest. And there’s so many very different types, y’know? It’s like picking your favorite kid. There’s the whale shark who’s just a giant water puppy. There’s the bull shark that will barrel into you if he even THINKS you’re lookin’ at him funny. And then you’ve got the ones in between that don’t matter. See...what I’m trying to do here, Alex. Is find a way to help you understand that YOU...are in very real danger. Lemme tell ya why.
(Levi does a summoning motion with his hand calling for the cameraman to sit with him as sharks swim overhead and behind and everywhere in between.)
Levi Russow: ...it’s time I get a little real, innit? ...innit? Fuck I been spending too much time with the Brits. Why did almost EVERYONE in my family marry the only worthy people in the UK. Well…’cept maybe Malachi but I think he just has a hormone imbalance. Anyway. My name...is Levi Russow. USUALLY It’s “The Iceman” Levi Russow. I am the Patriarch of the infamous Russow family you’ve seen running rampant on Twitter and...elsewhere. I’ve clocked 20 years in this business...and that’s a miracle. Because I was never supposed to see the AGE of 20. Curse of the Orphans, after all. Me and my brother Jesse...and another kid that...fuck the bloodline, he’s my brother.
(Levi runs his hands through his hair trying to maintain his composure.)
Levi Russow: I should warn you, Alex. I’m manic depressive bipolar with high anxiety and PTSD. I’m TELLING you this because I know you’re a goofy little sweetheart that loves to have fun but I swear by Odin’s beard if you walk into this match with anything but a scowl on your face, I’ll drink my mead from your severed kneecaps. I love fun and games man! Hey! Party at my house later, why not? But in the MEANTIME. It’s Mean Time. D’you know what I think Alex?
(Levi kicks his legs out resting his hands on his knees as he lays his head back against the glass right as a turtle swims by.)
Levi Russow: Look! I’ve been chosen! There’s a belief that if a sea tortoise chooses to check you out, that’s good luck! Whattya know! There’s your random fact of the day! But let’s get back to what’s...REALLY important. Alex Rush. Alex, I...I almost wanna tell you...that I don’t wanna do this. You’ve been so kind to my son and welcoming but I’ve checked you out and I understand what a victory over you would mean. And I NEED...that victory. Do you really think I’m coming back...for my one last grandiose crusade...and I’m gonna let a squeaky, fuzzy little man peach try to derail everything I’ve worked SO HARD to set up! THAT’S why I’m pissed off! Because I can guaran-fucking-tee you that lanky little bastard is “havin’ a pint” not takin’ my ass seriously. That’s fine...hey man...Alex...can I call you Alex? Have you ever seen the Northern Lights? God...they’re a sight to behold. My little brother proposed to his old lady under ‘em...they’re at the hospital havin’ a baby right now. So my bonus for this match is YOU are gonna catch the motherfucker of all beatdowns from a brand new Uncle! So shortly after...I so PROUDLY became...the Grandfather of Jack and Alanah’s children.
(Levi clicks his teeth and pops up shuffling his jacket on as he turns around and comes face to face with a charging mako shark who’s charging the glass as Levi flexes back at it, it diverts and swims off.)
Levi Russow: ...maybe THAT’S why I’m doin’ this. Maybe I heard someone call me “Gramps” for the first time and I instantly wanted to punch a hole through someone’s chest because I’M ONLY IN MY EARLY 40’S!!! So I have this little tick in my mind that makes me think you’re all gonna look at me and write me off as this old fossil that’s just bouncin’ babies on his knees and havin’ Sunday barbecues and all that shit and there’s nothing WRONG with that...for most people. But me? All these titles and changes, Grandpa, Uncle Levi, Old Man, all of ‘em...you just poked the bear! And now poor Alex Rush has to pay for it, Goddammit! I even think I LIKED that guy!
(Levi turns around and presses his forehead to the glass watching a great white swim by.)
Levi Russow: Look at him...the perfect predator. The only problem he has...is when he goes for the kill, much like all of you little bitches running around acting hard...when it’s time to go for the kill the shark rolls it’s eyes in the back of its head...it takes it’s eye off the ball. And most of YOU? You close your eyes when you swing. I don’t know who trained you? But I look forward to exposing ALL of you. Starting...with Alex Rush. I already said how bad I was gonna hurt this kid...what else is there to say? Oh...wait…
...it’s nothin’ personal “bruv”...you’re just in my way.My violent...violent way....Good Luck.(And with that Levi disappears into the darkness of the alcove as we fade out on a shot of the great white swimming by one more time.)
