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Topics - Julianna DiMaria

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1
Climax Control Archives / Sweet and Stupid No More (CORDELIA)
« on: April 26, 2024, 11:41:37 PM »
April 15

Cordelia Clark has returned home to Brooklyn following her brief cameo at Blaze of Glory. She’s angry as she’s looking at highlights (lowlights?) from Justin Smith’s SCW career up to this point. She turns off the monitor that she’s looking at and rolls her eyes.

“I got drawn with a fucking loser…”

Cordelia lets out an angry sigh and starts to ruminate about her time in Sin City Underground. She reflects on when she started out as an arrogant rookie before she turned over a new leaf and became one of the biggest sweethearts in the company even if she was struggling with confidence issues at first. Cordelia doesn’t know how to treat the SCU memories at this point.

“Of all the idiots in that tournament that I could’ve had as a partner, it had to be him…”

“Why do you have to behave like that, Cordy?”

Cordelia gets annoyed at the sudden presence of her older sister Morganna (who also wrestled in SCU as Morgan Clark for the most part).

“Wait, so the big sister that changed her wrestling name to Morganna as part of a temper tantrum over Amy Santino dissing her and forgetting who she was is suddenly asking me why I’m behaving a certain way?”

“It’s not all doom and gloom, Cordelia…” Morganna says with some anger in her voice. “Just because you drew someone that, on paper, might be one of the worst men on the roster and in the tournament doesn’t mean it can’t work out. The biggest loser can become a world champion at any point. After all, that’s what happened to Dani Weston, right?”

“Sis, I know my SCW history. When Dani’s Cinderella run as the SCW Bombshells World Champion ended, what did she become the rest of her SCW career?”

Morganna bites her lower lip with nervousness, knowing that the answer is far from a positive one whatsoever.

“Trying to compare my partner to Dani Weston is not a good idea….”

Morganna lets out a frustrated sigh.

“I know the drill, Morganna. I am not a miracle worker. I might be able to steal a win or two, but you’re kidding yourself if you actually think that Justin and I are going to win the tournament. I’m a realist. I’d have to pull a miracle to get through all four rounds especially when you consider that the tournament only gets tougher with every round.”

“So you’re giving up already?”

“More like tempering my expectations…” Cordelia says as she rolls her eyes.

“What happened to the baby sister that I had that would be a lot more optimistic in general? The Cordelia that I knew last year would be facing the odds and trying to make the most out of it. Maybe instead of running down your partner, you should try to teach him a thing or two… to uplift him? Maybe encourage him?”

“Oh shut UP…” Cordelia says with increasing anger in her voice. “The Cordelia that you’re describing is a pushover. If that Cordelia was in this tournament, there’s no way we’d even get past the first round. I mean, we might not anyway, but my new attitude is literally the one sliver of hope that I have of even getting by the first round. Period. When we lose in this tournament, it’ll be HIS fault. If SOMEHOW, SOMEWAY we win, it’ll be because of me and me alone. If I have to carry a sack of shit, then so be it. I mean for fuck’s sake, it’s not like I am used to carrying a sack of shit throughout my career anyway…”

“Cordy, I am not going to tolerate you calling me…”

“Not YOU, sis! By ‘sack of shit’, I’m talking about the burden of being the good girl that would see the bright light in everything and being naive, stupid and easy to take advantage of. I’ve had to make chicken salad out of chicken shit and after a while, it gets exhausting. I made chicken salad out of chicken shit in HYBRID when they didn’t care for me and were just satisfied to toss me aside for their ‘big names’ and I did the same thing with SCU in the end when it seemed like my run there was going to end with a whimper but I challenged Andrea Hernandez on their last show and kicked her ass! Maybe if YOU saw your wrestling career from a realistic standpoint, you wouldn’t be as mediocre as you’ve become ever since you lost the one world title you’ve had.”

“Cordelia, I don’t know how long you can continue this way. This is not the way to be…”

“Says the hypocrite that tore my gown off in front of the whole world in SCU and triggered Hayley Halsey having a sexual obsession with me…”

“How many times do I have to apologize for that?”

“Just leave me alone, Morgan. I know what I’m doing now. I’m not going to be that weakling anymore… not after everything I’ve had to suffer through. Being the sweetheart brought me nothing but tragedy, frustration and disappointment. The fact that I won three Vanguard titles in HYBRID and two Freedom titles in 5BW in spite of being such a pushover is a testament to what I DESERVE as my full potential. Get out of my face, sis! I’m done with this conversation.”

Morganna can only sigh with anger and disappointment before she makes her way out of Cordelia’s space.

“I will never let anyone bring me down or treat me like a piece of shit again…” Cordelia says with anger in her voice as she begins to remember the moment where the ‘sweetheart’ in her basically died…

Christmas 2023

Cordelia’s eyes are flooded with tears as she’s in a hospital room. Someone that means a hell of a lot to her in her then-boyfriend (now husband) Brian Everett is comatose on a hospital bed.

“How can this happen?” Cordelia asks herself. There is guilt flowing through her considering that the event where the love of her young life became comatose happened right in front of her in a wrestling ring to begin with.

Cordelia doesn’t even want to say anything or even have a thought cross her mind. She walks over to Brian and holds his hand hoping that some good vibes in any way will be enough for him to wake up. A few moments later, she leans into him, practically embracing him at this point.

“It should’ve never happened…” she thinks to herself. “He should’ve never been in harm’s way. I should’ve never let him come to the arena with me when I retained my Freedom title and got some revenge for him against the bastards that injured him in the first place. I should’ve told him to get out of the ring and propose to me backstage. I was going to say yes no matter what. But now, he’s in even WORSE condition…”

“You have some NERVE…” Cordelia hears the voice of an older woman say. She turns around with some reluctance and she spots her future mother in law. Mrs. Everett is completely angry as she gets closer to her. “Get away from him!”

Cordelia meekly moves away from her boyfriend without a fight.

“You realize that my son is in this condition because of YOU, right?”

Cordelia remains frozen, not even bothering to answer this.

“I’ve kept telling him repeatedly that he’s too good for you. You don’t have a spine. I’ve seen you in your career here and there being a constant pushover and letting everyone else run all over you. You should’ve never come into my son’s life at all!”

“Mrs. Everett… I didn’t…”

“Silence, child! I’m talking! I want my grandchildren to have a strong mother that will stand up for herself. God forbid you both get married and have children. You’re an absolutely worthless person, you understand that?”

Cordelia is conflicted between responding and staying quiet as tears roll down her face even more.

“Was it your idea for him to come out to the ring and try to propose to you before he got curb stomped and knocked unconscious? It was, wasn’t it?”

“Mrs. Everett, I had no idea that he was even thinking of that. How could it be my idea?”

“Was it you that suggested which jewelry store to go to when he got mugged and injured in the first place?”

“NO!” Cordelia says, with her anger growing. “Why are you blaming this on me? We should be on the same page! You and I have ONE thing in common and that’s the fact that NEITHER of us wanted this! If you want to think that I’m not good enough for your son, FINE! I don’t care what you think! You’ve never liked me. You’re never going to like me! For years, I’ve had to endure this kind of abuse from you just because you think I’m not good enough for him.”

“You’re NOT… and you NEVER will be! I want you to get out and I don’t want you ANYWHERE near my son again!”

“WHAT?” Cordelia shouts through her tears. “We’re both adults, you can’t cut me off from him!”

“Did I stutter, child? You’re coming NOWHERE near my son! You’re POISON to him and you always have been. My son deserves better than a no backbone bitch like you!”

Cordelia doesn’t respond, but she refuses to leave.

“Get out! Now! You’ve done enough damage! You’ve disgraced the Everett family enough. You’re just another example of how the Clarks are a menace to the Upper East Side. Pieces of elephant dung, all of you…”

“You could never understand the love that we…”

Mrs. Everett smacks Cordelia across the face.

“You have five seconds to get out of my life or I will call the police on you and have you thrown in jail fo being an insolent little BITCH! Five… four…”

Cordelia tearfully runs out of the room as fast as she can get out before she runs across the hall into an empty waiting room. She slams and locks the door, hides in a corner and just bawls, not knowing what to do or how to get out of the horrible situation she finds herself in. The “new Cordelia”, without question, isn’t taking this type of crap anymore.

April 15

Cordelia is in a calmer mood, but she’s still a bit upset regarding both Morganna’s incessant whining toward her from her own perspective as well as the pushover she just reflected on. She takes a deep breath and is so far into her mind that she doesn’t notice her husband sitting next to her. She looks at Brian and smiles, knowing that she finally has a face she wants to see.

“Welcome home…” he says to her as they kiss each other.

“That was a bit of a fight back from the SCW show…” Cordelia admits, still looking annoyed.

“Is everything okay?”

“My sister was getting on my ass for what I was saying about my Blast from the Past tournament partner.”

“Jesus, can she let it go already?”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell her but she won’t understand that I can’t be the pushover that I was anymore. I know I won a bunch of singles titles in my career, but why do I have to accept when bad things happen to me, when things don’t go my way or I guess in this case, a draw that completely fucked me over?”

“You don’t have to take that shit, Cordelia. Morgan needs to let go of who you used to be.”

“If I wasn’t the pushover that I used to be, you would’ve never been in a coma to begin with, my career in HYBRID goes way better than it did, I wouldn’t have had to scramble for a match on SCU’s final show, I might have another world title or two to my name by now…”

“It’s a better time now…” Brian assures her as he wraps an arm around her. “...and I believe in you. You’re in an outright shit situation with who your partner is in that Blast from the Past tournament, but I wouldn’t be surprised if you found away to get to the semifinals. Though, I understand the odds but…”

“It’s going to take a miracle to even win one…” I reiterate.

“You’ve pulled miracles before…” Brian reminds her. “I never thought that my mother was ever going to come around and accept you into our family but you impressed her with your new attitude. If you can pull THAT off, then I don’t see why you can’t win at least one match in this tournament despite being anchored by a terrible partner.”

Finally, Cordelia can smile. She is thrilled on the inside that someone gets her and where she is coming from.

“Your mother coming around with me is the BEST comparison that you can make in this situation. This is why I love you so much! You GET ME! You’re not trying to push me back to that stupid pushover that I was. I was worried that when I turned that new leaf over that you were going to reject me and that you were going to want an annulment…”

“No, Cordy. That was never going to happen. On the contrary, I’ve actually grown to love you more now that you’ve gotten more of a backbone. I loved who you were before, but I married a hell of a woman two months ago. But… let’s be real…”

Brian scoffs as he delivers a ‘harsh truth’ that Cordelia will not hesitate to agree with.

“You have a better chance of winning that mixed tag tournament with ME as your partner and I’m not even a wrestler at all.”

Cordelia laughs at this, showing no signs of disagreement.

“That’s the damn truth… and I’m not going to step aside. I’m not going to let the bigger names get an accolade at my expense. I’m tired of being relegated to the sidelines just because I don’t have the right last name or because I don’t have seventy five million Twitter followers. I’m done with it! I am NOT going to fear THE BIG NAMES. If I happen to cross paths with any of them… those that are known in SCW… or elsewhere… I WILL make sure, even if that sack of shit costs me the match, that the BIG NAME does NOT beat me!

“You’ve stepped aside for the “popular kids” long enough, Cordy!”

“You’re fucking right I have… back when I was sweet and stupid…”

Cordelia scoffs at this notion.

“Well I’m NOT sweet and stupid anymore….”

Cordelia stands up and her husband stands along with her.

“Not anymore… not now… never again…”

Cordelia walks out of her home, clearly determined even if the situation to her is looking rather bleak. She knows the challenge ahead will be difficult, especially with a partner she would’ve never wanted, but she also knows she has all the talent and all the gusto in the world to break through and show the world she’s not going to stand for being pushed over again.

April 26

Cordelia’s got the camera right in front of her and the most notable thing is that she is standing in front of a trash can on an anonymous street. She’s holding two championships on her shoulders and she is even wearing an SCU shirt as a bit of a reminder of where she started in her career. She’s got an angry glare in her eye as she begins to speak.

“For those of you that remember me, my name is Cordelia Clark and I am one of the greatest prodigies that Sin City Underground has ever seen. Don’t give me the fucking lecture of how long that company has been dead. I am very much aware of that. Some of you idiots are going to be that fucking predictable, I know that for a fact. When it came to Sin City Underground, the sad, unfortunate truth is that the legacy of that company has been marred and ruined by the names that have since infested the Bombshell roster. When the “best Bombshells from SCU” are supposedly Krystal Wolfe and Ariana Angelos… two women that I made my BITCH over and over again, then you know you have a problem. BUT, let’s not talk about mediocrity. Let’s talk about ME! Let’s talk about how I broke out and became a world champion in SCU at just 22 years of age. Let’s talk about how I was a TV Champion. Let’s talk about how I beat some of the bigger names for those belts and was the constant owner of Angel Kash! Yeah, I did REALLY fucking good for myself. I’d like to think that when it comes to the history and the legacy of that company, I’m a big fucking deal.

Yeah, I know that I don’t have a history in SCW aside from retaining that Underground Championship at High Stakes 2021…”

Cordelia pauses as she rolls her eyes in exaggerated boredom.

“You lot are fucking predictable, let me put it that way. There was no way I wasn’t going to come back here at least once. After all, Sin City Underground for all of its faults is where I started my career and even though I have turned over a new leaf since the sad closure of the company, I will ALWAYS have an appreciation for where my wrestling journey began. Now, since SCU’s closure… I’ve put together a hell of a career! Three time HYBRID Vanguard Champion… and look, I have that title with me! Two time and CURRENT 5BW Freedom Champion and the most dominant holder of this title that the company has ever had! And hey, I have this title with me too! But, I’m not here just to show off some belts I’ve won in other places. I’m showcasing these belts to make a point…”

At this point, Cordelia pauses again as she suddenly tosses the HYBRID Vanguard Championship in the trash.

“...and that point is that unlike who I was in Sin City Underground, I am NO… FUCKING… PUSHOVER! What does the WORTHLESS belt I just tossed in the trash have anything to do with this? Well, let me bring you up to speed on that. Aside from a few idiots in the locker room, I don’t have a bad thing to say about 5BW as a whole. Of course, I’d never say anything bad about SCU. But HYBRID… oh gosh… these people saw my name and they thought “oh they’re not so and so, so therefore, they are not important.”. Sure, I won that belt I just tossed in the trash three times, but that was their ceiling for me. That title is the equivalent of the SCW Bombshells Roulette Championship… the supposed third-tier title. So, that company just anchored that belt on me thinking that my ceiling was being a THIRD TIER WRESTLER…

FUCK THAT!

And FUCK THAT COMPANY! They expected me to be HAPPY with being a third tier wrestler that was just there to make the BIG NAMES look better! Toward the end, when I realized that they didn’t give a fuck about me enough because I wasn’t THAT BIG NAME, I decided that they weren’t worth my energy anymore and yet, I STILL won that third-tier title for the final time. If you expect me to just lie down and die in this tournament and bend the knee to a “BIG NAME” in SCW or in the business in this tournament just because of the fact that I drew probably the worst wrestler on the men’s side of the company aside from maybe THE TROLL, then… you know… go fuck yourself. Because that’s NOT going to happen and my first round match EPITOMIZES what I am talking about, people!

My first Bombshells opponent in this tournament is Serena Riot…”

Cordelia kicks the trash can down and shrugs.

“I guess I should just kick the bucket as far as my tournament hopes and dreams go and go home right? After all, Justin Smith SUCKS and he’s dealing with Eddie Lyons who clearly has his number and it’s SERENA RIOT! OH MY GOD, I AM FACING SERENA RIOT! BIG NAME IN THE BUSINESS MAKING HER SCW DEBUT! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD! I’m SCREWED! I have no chance of beating her! Me and my 200 Twitter followers pale in comparison to someone SO NOTORIOUS that has wrestled all around the world and has over four times as many Twitter followers as I do! I’m FUCKED guys! I should just lie down and bend the knee to the BIG NAME because EVERYONE knows who Serena Riot is while NOBODY outside of the places I wrestle for know who Cordelia Clark is!

FUCK THAT!

Serena, you’ve done what you’ve done all around the world and everything and I am not going to take away those accomplishments from you but that does not and will not make you better than me. I don’t give a fuck about your reputation. I don’t give a fuck if you strike fear into the hearts of the fickle masses. To me, you’re another obstacle and another opponent. I don’t need that sack of shit I am carrying to beat Eddie Lyons. All I need to do is beat YOU and that’s exactly what I will do. You’re treated as wrestling royalty all around the world in most places but as far as I know when it comes to SCW history, BIG NAMES like you come to this company and flop more often than not and this Sunday, that’s exactly what is going to happen. I WANT this match WAY more than you do! Don’t take what I said about my partner at Blaze of Glory as weakness, I am more than good enough to be able to beat you for the very reason that I just stated.

You’re too preoccupied with other things with your time.

You signed up for this tournament, but I haven’t even seen a peep from you regarding this tournament. I mean, you’re such a ghost when it comes to the Blast from the Past tournament that I even question if you know who your partner is. I mean you probably do, but are you even IN THIS? Or are you just one of those wrestlers that decided to take part ONLY for the title shot and nothing else? You know the types. You’re too preoccupied with the company that you run and even wrestling in it yourself to care about this tournament, honestly. Hell, I bet if you’ve even seen the lineup for this Sunday’s show, you’ve seen my name and you’ve asked yourself ‘who the fuck is Cordelia Clark?’. If that’s the question that you are asking about me, then come Sunday I am going to introduce you to the fuck I am. On top of the fact that I KNOW I want this more than you do, a quick glance at your social media activity recently shows, for one, the promotion of your own company which is understandable. That’s your baby, basically. But hours ago, you’re talking about how you don’t even know what your future holds.

In fact… the first line in your Twitter bio even says “Retired Bitch”.

Wow, I bet Eddie is going to be REAL happy to know that, right? I don’t know if it’s a piece of information that you forgot to update, in which case that would be an indicator that you’ve retired from this business at least once, but still… the fact that you are openly mulling your own future basically says it all. You don’t want this tournament. You definitely don’t want this match. And aside from running your company, I don’t even know what you even want out of this business anymore. In fact, do YOU know what you want out of this? To me, Serena, while your accomplishments aren’t one to deny, what I see with you is a bunch of smoke and mirrors. I see a woman whose passion about the business fluctuates like the damn weather. You probably see someone like me and you probably think I’m not worth your time. Either way, all of the aggression that I STILL have boiling in me from ALL of the times I’ve been FUCKED OVER and made to STEP ASIDE for the ESTABLISHED BIG NAME is going to be unleashed on Sunday.

You are EXACTLY the “BIG NAME” that I need to beat in order to silence the critics and let the fucking idiots in this business know that they don’t have a right to look past me anymore just because I’m not all over the place with a fucking million Twitter followers. If PINNING YOU in the middle of the ring is what shocks the world, then FUCK IT because it’s about fucking time people know about the name Cordelia Clark in this business. I’ve stepped aside and eaten shit for the benefit of wrestlers like you LONG ENOUGH and being paired up with a piece of shit like Justin Smith and you being my first round opponent is where I draw the line. That passion, that anger, that hunger inside of me is what will be your undoing and hell, if you have a fragile ego, maybe I can be the one to send you to what would be at least a second retirement. You’re yapping on Twitter about how you don’t know what your future holds…

Well… how about on Sunday, I make that questioning a little clearer for you, huh?

So take your “216” bullshit back to Cleveland… a city of BOTTOM FEEDING LOSERS BY THE WAY… and focus on just running your company, okay? How about I relieve that burden for you, Serena?

Of course, your partner…. Eddie Lyons…

Look, let me be real here. I am not going to be in the ring with Eddie at any point during our match because of the mixed tag team rules in Sin City Wrestling. So, addressing him at ALL would be a waste of my time. Now, I know that he and Justin share a history recently and that may come into play as far as Sunday is concerned, but… honestly, I can give fuck all about that.

I’m sure you know how I feel about you Justin.

And if I could fathom a guess, you’re probably not happy with me because I spoke the truth at Blaze of Glory with my draft reaction.

I don’t give a fuck, Justin.

The truth is the truth. You’re ONE AND FUCKING ELEVEN in this company! You haven’t won a match this year and you’ve lost eight singles matches in a row. What the fuck do you expect? For me to say “Oh I’m going to make the most out of this and it’s going to be a great experience and I’m gonna motivate him to be better and I’m going to be his friend and puppies and rainbows and sunshine and…” UGGGGGGH!

You’re a LOSER… a TROGLODYTE… a MISCREANT… a BOTTOM FEEDING, HAPLESS INSIPID FOOL….

Who has lost three straight times to Eddie Lyons…

Get your ‘thank yous’ ready, you piece of shit because I’m the reason why both the Lyons streak and your losing streak is about to end. When I ‘shock the world’ and PIN Serena Riot, your victory total in SCW is going to literally DOUBLE! You’re WELCOME, Justin…

Eddie, I’m sorry but your partner doesn’t give enough of a shit and I WILL exploit that to the best of my ability. I WILL beat Serena and I will show the world that Cordelia Clark…

IS!

THAT!

BITCH!

She’s nothing but a worm just like anyone else that would be cursed enough to live in Cleveland… a place in the dying Rust Belt that won’t get with the times and will never regain the glory it began to lose 70 years ago.

In Cleveland, all they know is SADNESS…

In Brooklyn, all we know is being HEAD OF THE CLASS!

And somehow, someway, on Sunday, this Princeton graduate will be just that!"

Cordelia leaves the trash can that she kicked, and the HYBRID Vanguard Championship that she dumped in it, behind. She departs with just her 5BW Freedom Championship with her figurative nose in the air, showing no regrets about anything she just said about her opponents, or even her own partner, as the camera ultimately fades to black.

2
Climax Control Archives / Imperfections Pt. 3
« on: March 15, 2024, 11:59:31 PM »
March 4

The day after my win over Krystal Wolfe, I was in San Diego’s airport coming back from that match. I was walking through the tarmac just trying to get out of there and to avoid any rabid fans but there was one that recognized me and stopped me.

“Wait, are you Julianna DiMaria?” the young lady asked me.

“Yeah…”

“SCW Bombshells World Champion…” she added.

“You want an autograph or something? Is that it?”

“No, I’m not your biggest fan. I can’t wait to see Kayla Richards kick your ass. Cool meeting you though!”

My eyes narrowed with anger as the young lady walked away from me. I shook my head and had some internal thoughts.

“Everyone is rooting for me to fail and why wouldn’t they? I’m the outsider that came in and took the company by storm harder than any other Bombshell has  in a long time. I love how someone is already writing me off as far as Kayla Richards is concerned…”

I was already thinking about the face to face encounter we had the night before where we had agreed to the contract signing that was to take place the next Sunday.

“...but I’m getting the match that I wanted…” I thought to myself. “When I beat her, all the disrespectful pieces of shit like that bitch that just said that to me are going to quit throwing their shade at me.”

I sighed, shook my head and then continued down the tarmac until I ran into Liam.

“What? Are you here to tell me that Kayla is going to kick my ass too?” I said, acting really snappy toward a recent friendly face that I’ve been spending a bit of time with lately. Liam was taken aback by my snappy attitude.

“Let me guess, a fan?” he asked me.

“Yeah… what are you doing here though?”

“I knew you were landing soon and I wanted to catch up as soon as I could. I have a flight out of here myself to Seattle to take care of some career related stuff for the next week.”

“Right…” I said with a sigh.

“I need to be honest with you, Julianna. I’ve really enjoyed reuniting with you and spending some time with you.”

“Thanks…” I said awkwardly, not being used to compliments from a guy.

“I’ve got plans for Phoenix later this month and I scored some spring training tickets for the Padres. I was wondering if you wanted to go with me.”

This put my head and my heart in a bind. My heart wanted to say yes, but in my head, all I could think about was Kayla Richards and wanting to beat the hell out of her. I looked down on the floor and then back at him.

“I can’t…” I said, the disappointment in his face becoming clear immediately. “Don’t get me wrong, I love spending time with you too and Spring Training sounds like fun, but I’ve got to be focused with my career right now. You saw last night how I just scored what’s going to be my toughest title defense yet…”

“Yeah… sure…” Liam responded, clearly still disappointed.

“I hope you understand that it’s not you. I like you. But right now, I can’t have any fun. I’m so pissed off that the company I represent as a world champion continues to short change me. I mean come on, I had to face Krystal Wolfe last night. God, I got no joy in beating that wannabe. It was SUCH an insult and opponents like that aren’t going to silence the idiots I have to deal with. I’ve got to stay on top of my game to humble and silence ANYONE that comes in my way and KAYLA… well, I can’t wait to put my fists in her fucking face for all the cowardly side talk she dropped on  me for weeks…”

“Right, I understand Julianna… being the dominant wrestler that is SCW Bombshells World Champion comes first…” Liam says with a sarcastic hint in his voice. “...because apparently, being a person isn’t that high on your priority list. I need to check in for my flight…”

Liam turns and leaves and I was left taken aback by his answer. I sighed, feeling a little bit bad about the rejection I gave him.

“I can’t let up… not against anyone… not for any reason…”

I sighed, turning back and walking out of the tarmac and the airport.

Sadly, my ‘obsession’ with my career wasn’t just limited to rejecting a date.

March 11

“What the hell do you mean you have to cancel dinner this week?” my mother asks me over the phone as I sit on my living room couch.

“I just found out about my match and it’s against that sorry ass Swede that can’t keep my name out of her mouth and if she beats me, she gets a title shot and I CANNOT HAVE THAT HAPPEN!”

I could hear my mother let out an annoyed sigh.

“You’re canceling dinner because of Selena Seduc… Sedew… how the hell do you pronounce her last name? Honey, seriously. Don’t you think you’re worrying about your world title reign just a little too much now? The longer you’ve been champion the more you’ve been pulling away.”

“Mom, it’s not like that. I just REALLY need to focus, okay? If I lose to that woman… GOD, the embarrassment! I mean, it would prove everyone that ever criticized my reign right and it would really give Kayla a massive advantage over me!”

“Why do you insist on going down this path, honey?”

“”Because I’m sick and fucking tired of the disrespect, that’s why! I’m tired of people criticizing my reign. I’m tired of wrestlers lesser than me throwing shade! Even I’ve got to admit that I’ve had an okay reign, but I’m never happy with it…”

I paused to let out a sigh to showcase my frustrations with my title reign.

“I had to go after Kayla because the fact of the matter is, my SCW Bombshells World title reign isn’t good enough yet… not until I get the supercard main event that I want so damn bad to bring the title back to the prominence it lost under my supercilious, stupid cunt of a predecessor…”

“Oh honey…” I could almost imagine my mother shaking her head on the other end. “...maybe it wasn’t the best idea to throw you right into the main event picture just four matches into your SCW career. You’re becoming too obsessed and you’re becoming too hard on yourself. Your reign is more than good enough right now. It hurts me to say what I’m about to say with you and your wrestling career, but when it comes to that…”

I could almost hear the reluctant pause on the other end.

“...you’re just like your dad…”

“EXCUSE ME?” I said, almost yelling at my own mother.

“You’re both exactly the same! Remember all of those times you wanted to spend time with him but he wasn’t willing or able to do it because he had this very important wrestling thing or because he had to train extra hard for a main event match. You’re doing the exact same thing right now! You can’t even spend time with your own mother just because you’ve got to be ready for your possible supercard main event. Unbelievable! I didn’t raise you like this!”

“I am nothing like him…” I said, with an annoyed anger in my voice.

“Julianna, please take a step back for a little bit and think about what your life outside of your career is like and you tell me if that’s a life that you want to continue living. It’s only a few minutes out of your BUSY SCHEDULE! I better see you at dinner next week…”

“Sure mother…”

I rolled my eyes as I hung up the phone. As much as I tried to ignore it, I couldn’t help but stop to think about my life outside of the ring. I thought about my friends in my life…

…the ones from high school were already long gone from my life.

Christy, Ally and Liam were basically the only ones from wrestling school I still talk to and the latter, I only started having contact with again.

I reflected on a time where I wanted to get married and have children of my own as well as the fact that my last relationship was with a disgusting, sexual deviant named Minka Carter, another wrestler in the business, who was obsessed with seeing me naked and wanting to have sex with me far more than ever having a serious relationship.

“Shit…” I said, coming to the horrible realization that for all of my success in the ring, I hardly ever took the time to take care of myself and be my own person.

“Mother’s right…” I added with a sigh as I reflected on how my father was when it came to my upbringing in the business.

October 23, 2016

Sin City Wrestling happened to be in San Bernardino that night, not TOO far from San Diego and I was beaming being backstage at that night’s Climax Control just a day shy of my 22nd birthday. James Tuscini and Ryan Keys (WHO?) were the main event that night in a “Steve’s Rules” Roulette Championship but for me personally…

“Dad, they told me that I had a great tryout match…” I said to him as he seemed to be less than impressed. Silly, naive me was just way too excited.

“That’s nice, Jules…” he said, further showing how unimpressed he was. “You did pretty good against that local chick and you won as I expected you to, but did you get a contract? Did they tell you anything? Is Sin City Wrestling going to sign you?”

I was a bit frozen with what to say considering I had just come out of a conversation with their officials and I had already known the answer.

“Well…”

“What did they say, Jules? Damn it!”

“To quote them… ‘You had a great tryout match and the fans seemed a bit into you, but right now, we think you could use a little more seasoning in other places and actually break mainstream first before we can look at you again….’

“Unfuckingbelieveable…” my father told me.

“Basically, they said ‘not now, but with time’...”

“Yeah, I know how to interpret that. But why the hell are you so happy when they rejected you just like the other three places you tried out for did the same?”

“They told me that I was very close to being offered a contract so…” I said, still beaming with pride. “...this is the closest I’ve EVER come to making it, Dad! I’m so excited about that!”


“Sit down…” he snapped at me.

“...Dad?”

“Seriously, sit down.” he said, with a more demanding tone.

I complied, having no other choice really. He towered over me and he was making it clear before he ever said a word that he wasn’t happy with me.

“Julianna, you’ve got to make sacrifices to make it in this business…”

“Yeah, I know that.”

“It’s time for you to practice that. Starting right now, until you make it in the big leagues, you are going to sacrifice.”

“...sacrifice what?”

“You are going to have no social life! I don’t care how ‘close’ you came to SCW signing you, but they didn’t sign you so ‘close’ don’t mean shit.”

“But Dad, if they put me up against an actual Bombshell, I could’ve beaten them and gotten a contract and…”

“Nah, stop it! I’m tired of you coming ‘close’ to being signed. Federations aren’t signing you because you’re not good enough yet, pure and simple FACT! The ones that make it in this business go out and make the sacrifices that they need to do to get ahead and go to the next level. They don’t sit there going ‘could’ve’ or ‘should’ve’, they get SHIT DONE! You’re not taking this seriously enough. So, until you get signed? No parties. No friends. No boyfriends. No dates. NOTHING!”

“....daddy, REALLY? You’re going to just take my whole social life away? I’m literally going to have no freedom at all!”

“You’ve got to treat this business like it’s your life, Julianna… starting NOW! That means… no distractions! I’m sure your boyfriend… what’s his face… will understand when you call him right now and dump him.”

“...what?”

“Call him right now and tell him you can’t see him anymore…”

“I turn 22 tomorrow, are you KIDDING?”

“DO IT! No more distractions! No more excuses! Or are you the useless daughter I always thought you were?”

I couldn’t help but cringe as I pulled out my phone and reluctantly called my then-boyfriend at that time to tell him I couldn’t see him anymore.

How humiliating…

March 11, 2024

Once I was done reliving that memory, I was completely haunted by it.

“...is this a healthy way to live?”

This was the question I was asking as I suddenly felt an immense amount of guilt toward how I treated my own mother and Liam recently all because I was putting my wrestling career first, second and third just like my father instilled (some would say brainwashed) into me.

I thought about the way Liam came at me in the airport after I said no to him and the guilt really became overbearing at that point. I felt compelled to call him and that’s exactly what I did because I came to realize that the way I treated him was horrible. He answered the phone after a few rings.

“Yes?” he asked me, giving me the vibe that he wasn’t quite willing to talk to me yet.

“Liam, I wanted to say I’m sorry. My behavior at the airport and how I treated you was unacceptable. I don’t want to be just like my dad and I’ve realized that I’ve been acting like him. You know that my wrestling career means the world to me and I want to be the best that I can be at that, but I shouldn’t be letting it consume my personal life. I really need to step back and quit being so obsessed with SCW, and Kayla Richards and all of that.”

“I appreciate that, Julianna. I got frustrated when you said ‘no’ back at the airport. You’re a great girl, more than you could ever give yourself credit for. But I don’t want to hang out with Julianna the professional wrestler. Underneath all of that rough exterior that you feel like you have to wear all the damn time is a hell of a person that I really want to be around. I support your career, don’t get me wrong. But I want the best for you as a person more than anything. I’m crazy about you and I don’t know why…”

“Do me a favor?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you hold that thought until you elaborate in person? Say… a Padres spring training game out in Phoenix?”

I could hear Liam laugh on the other end.

“Woman, you’re unreal! Sure! We’ll do that. I need to go, but I’ll send you all the information later.”

“Fine… good night!” I said, before I heard him return the farewell and then hang up the phone. I came to a realization not long after he hung up.

“Maybe I should start to focus on taking care of myself better instead of being so obsessed with my SCW title reign…”

As my match with Seleana Zdunich grew closer, I was beginning to weigh any possibilities of how I was going to accomplish that. But soon enough, I was back in ‘game mode’...

March 15, 2024

Finding myself in Stanford, I couldn’t help but be amused at the irony of being in a college town knowing that my opponent was an absolute dunce. I was on the main campus of the university itself and I was watching a replay of “The Game” between Stanford and California football where the band ran out on the field at the end. I could only smirk as I turned off the camera and began to express my thoughts.

“There’s the band running out on the field during that infamous football game over 40 years ago. You want to know why I am playing that clip so randomly, Seleana Zdunich? Because THAT is what it is going to take for you to beat me this Sunday and even then, it’s fair to say that even with the help from the marching band, you probably still wouldn’t be able to beat me. You know, this whole thing between us has been building up for months even though recently it’s all been from your end which is honestly quite sad. I have to ask you this…

Why are you SO obsessed with me?

No really, ever since I name dropped you a couple of times following my SCW Bombshells World Championship win, you’re name dropping me at every god damn turn as if you want to cheat on your fucked up excuse of a wife for me. Oh wait, is that ‘making hen out of feathers’? Don’t fucking talk to me about that Seleana, because this whole obsession that you’ve had with me regarding whatever it is between us has been YOU doing that! I mean, ever since I name dropped you the way I did, you’ve been complaining and whining and bitching about that clearly showing that you got your feelings hurt. I mean seriously, how many times did you name drop me in your recent promos? You’ve had so many chances just to face me without this bullshit Golden Opportunity thing: the Golden Briefcase… which you lost… and a little further back, that stupid four way tournament that Bella Madison won in which going into that match, you cut this HORRIBLE promo toward ME as if you were facing ME and not Bella Madison…

I mean no wonder she ultimately kicked your ass, am I right?

More on that putrid excuse of a promo, Seleana… but I want to address some more recent examples of where you have shamelessly name dropped me. Exhibit A… the golden briefcase match itself…

You’re talking about how you’re sorry that I can’t find a better excuse of my time then to bring up your marriage?

Girl, I’m sorry that you can’t find a better excuse of your time as a WRESTLER than to painfully try to talk shit about me in your promos basically every time you cut one. I’m sorry that I’m in your head so fucking bad. I’m sorry that in that specific promo for the Golden Briefcase match, you couldn’t find a better use of your promo time then to defend such a psychotic excuse of a person going around sucking the ass of former Bombshell Andrea Hernandez whenever she was in this company. And you want to call me “lazy” and “uncreative”, right? When you’re over there spewing nonsense toward me that you clearly copied out of Courtney Pierce’s homework notes… quite badly I should say.

I mean if you’re going to copy off of someone else’s homework, can you at least copy notes of someone that actually BEAT ME? Oh wait, NOBODY in this company has beaten me. You spent like 60 percent of your first golden briefcase promo targeting ME… all because I said some MEAN THINGS about you, your career and your personal life…

But I’m the ‘hen maker’...

I merely scoffed at this and rolled my eyes.

“You did so AFTER I decided I was done talking about you because once you lost to Bella in that tournament, I had no reason to even follow your career… or what’s left of it. God knows you haven’t won on a Supercard in God knows how long. I’m not going to get into how long you haven’t held a championship, but I think you SHOULD begin to understand what I am getting at. You’ve blown TWO recent world championship related opportunities but SOMEHOW you have this match against me to potentially get your own title shot and it’s SO laughable because you haven’t done shit to earn a shot at my title since… fucking hell, I don’t even remember how long ago that was. You want to know why you’re so fucking butthurt about what I used to say about you that you continued to throw shade at me in your pathetic excuses of promos long after I decided that you weren’t even worth talking about anymore?

Because what I said about you is the TRUTH!

You ARE a relic, Seleana!

You haven’t accomplished anything relevant in this company in YEARS!

After your last tour of duty with the SCW Bombshells World Championship many eons ago, you stopped giving a real fuck about your wrestling career because you were too busy being the embarrassing side chick of that lunatic you got married to and whose fault is that, Seleana? That’s not my fault. That’s your fault. Whose fault is it that your career has sunk so low that it can see the bones stuck at the bottom of the infamous La Brea tar pits? That’s your fault! Don’t take your fucking insecurities out on me because you haven’t accomplished a damn thing in this company in god knows how long. Don’t be turning on the camera and being a bitter, stupid little bitch like you tend to be and take digs at people better than you when more often than not, you can’t back it up and you haven’t backed it up in ages. You throw shade at me for months over two weeks worth of me telling the truth about your career, but I’m the hen maker, right?

NOW let’s talk about the ‘hen maker’ promo you had.

You know, the one where you were trying to trash my title reign which by the way was stupid because for one, my title reign was only a few weeks in at the time and far too soon to even give any criticism for and two, what the FUCK do you know about being a world champion in this company, Seleana? Like I said, you wasted 80 percent of that promo against Bella talking about me. You gave away that fucking match before the bell rang because you were so fucking obsessed with me and ti was really hilarious, but also really sad to watch as you self-destructed and unraveled over a bunch of comments that I made about you. You tried to talk about how I ‘fear’ that nobody will target me as champion like that’s supposed to be some kind of insult but I seem to recall that Kayla was going after me for weeks before I finally got her in the ring and confronted her face to face and then how I had my grand celebration to open up 2024 only to be interrupted by someone that wanted a title shot. Yeah, I’d say that comment aged as well as your career has. I mean, let’s be honest with each other Seleana…

The only time you were world champion?

You know… for all of like 14 days or however short it was?

The only reason why Alicia Lukas targeted you was because she wanted that belt back from you, otherwise?

Nobody would’ve targeted you. Hell, other than Bea Barnhart in recent years, who actually HAS targeted you? Who in their right mind has come into this company and said “damn it, I wanna kill Seleana Zdunich…”

NOBODY…

Other than Bea… only because she was obsessed with beating you after she had failed to do so in 5 tries…

And SOMEHOW, you can’t look in the mirror and see that YOU’RE the fucking problem with your career and why it’s in the pits that it is in right now. You had this championship for TWO FUCKING WEEKS, Seleana. TWO FUCKING WEEKS… and you brag and boast about that and you act as if everyone was out to get you when you had ONE four way defense against the former champion who wanted the title back, your wife, and some other bitch whose name escapes me at the moment. SOME CHAMPION you were, Seleana! Oh my god, everyone wanted a piece of you as champion for all of TWO FUCKING WEEKS! And really, the whole theory that you had of why they set up a mini tournament ‘just for someone to pay attention to you’ is FUCKING LAUGHABLE… and bullshit…

And it really reveals not just how poorly educated you are in general, but how you’re willing to stretch the truth and say whatever it is you want to fucking say about me and try so hard to make it true when it never will be… almost as if you’re…

GASP…

Making a hen out of feathers!

Hey idiot, let me ask you a question.

What if Courtney Pierce wasn’t a fucking egomaniacal, sore loser MORON that wanted to rush the title rematch between her and I to the first Climax Control after High Stakes? Yeah, don’t you think that instead of defending my championship against the winner of a stupid tournament like that between four women that didn’t fucking deserve that shot in the first place, that I would’ve defended it against her at the Supercard instead? NO! Because you’re so BUTTHURT and you’re such an insecure little BITCH that instead of putting the blame for your mediocrity on yourself where it needs to be, if you can even call it mediocrity anymore because I think you’ve become the saddest excuse of a Sin City Wrestling Bombshell this side of Chloe Benton… or perennial loser Jessie Salco… you decide to take it out on people that are far superior than what you’ll ever be again!

You don’t THINK…

You’ve never learned HOW to think.

No wonder you’ve fallen so far down the pecking order that the name Seleana Zdunich makes people laugh rather than make people stand up and take notice like they did way back when.

You made this fucking STUPID lie about me and my title reign, copying Courtney’s ‘nobody cares about you’ fucking NONSENSE and you made something out of basically little…

All because I said a few words about you two Climax Controls in a row about your career and where it was at and said that you were a thing of the past…

All because I spoke the truth…

But I’M the problem?

Girl, I’m not the one that’s obsessed. YOU are! Everything that I just dissected proves that! Someone needs to put a damn straightjacket on you and take you away to a mental health facility because if you’re that damn obsessed with me, I’d hate to be around you when you happen to hold anything resembling a gun or a knife.

I’M not the one going out of my way to devote more than half of my promo time to you when I am facing other Bombshells…

YOU ARE…

The ONLY reason why I am even addressing you NOW is because I HAVE TO… because trust me Seleana, I’d rather do better and more productive things with my time than address a psychopathic piece of shit that clearly cannot accept the fact that she’s past it… or at the very least accept responsibility for the state of her own career and how she put it there herself by being just like Mercedes Vargas, just like Jessie Salco, and just like all the other dumbass ‘old school’ Bombshells that used to infect this place with their Golden Girls bullshit or STILL do… looking at YOU Sam Marlowe: by being unable to EVOLVE!

You’re a tired act, Seleana.

You put yourself in this situation because you don’t evolve, you don’t change, you don’t adapt to the changing times of this company. You never have! This division has passed you by and you don’t have the passion to do anything different or to evolve and grow in any way…

THAT’S why this match is bullshit…

THAT’S why you don’t deserve this match…

THAT’S why I’m going to beat you and just cast you aside….

Let THAT hurt…

BITCH!

At this point, with all the rage in me, I shut off the camera and take a breather, knowing that someone like Seleana Zdunich is NOT worth my anger…



3
Climax Control Archives / Imperfections Pt. 2
« on: March 01, 2024, 11:50:28 PM »
I had just retained my championship at My Bloody Valentine moments ago and I was seething with anger as the men’s world title match was on. I was obviously still bitter that it was another sausagefest main event on a supercard, which in and of itself was annoying. But what was more annoying was my mother on the other end of the phone as she had called me as soon as she gave me time to breathe from beating Alexandra.

“What were you thinking, Julianna?” she asked me, as I sighed and rolled my eyes. “Great, you won your match against Alexandra and kept your title, but going after Kayla Richards like that? Are you kidding me?”

“I can beat her too, mother…” I said, clearly with an angry tone in my voice that was enough to make my mother silent for a moment.

“I know you can, honey. But, calling out someone before you had even defended the title… that’s dangerous…”

I shook my head with disgust as I didn’t want to deal with my mother’s nagging at the moment.

“You realize that had you lost to Alexandra, you would’ve looked really stupid, right?”

“You’re calling me stupid now?”

Now it was my mother sighing.

“No, I’m saying you would’ve because you were getting ahead of yourself. Why would you even think of doing such a thing?”

“You want to know why? I’m not happy with my title reign.”

“Come off it, honey. You’re doing a great job with the title.”

“No I’m not…” I said, almost in denial.

“Have you lost the title? Have you lost a match in SCW yet?”

“Mom, if I was doing such a great job with this title, I wouldn’t have people like Kayla Richards taking potshots at me literally every single time she opens her mouth about me and I wouldn’t have idiots saying ‘nobody cares about you’ and I especially wouldn’t have challengers just move on like nothing happened. Yeah, I won but my two best title defenses are Bella and Alexandra… not exactly world beaters, are they?”

“I agree that they’re not challenging you enough but you’re doing the most with what they’re giving you.”

“Bella and Alexandra aren’t exactly Myra and Andrea mother…” I said with a sigh in reference to two of the more dominant Bombshells that once wrestled in SCW in recent years. “It pains me that those types of women are my ‘best defenses’ because as far as title readiness… I don’t know… in my heart, I feel like I can do better than those two. It even feels like people in this company are rooting for me to lose which makes it worse…”

“...I doubt that’s true…”

“Oh you should’ve listened to the idiots on commentary after my defense against Bea overreacting and predicting I’d lose to Alexandra just because my match with Bea was ‘close’. That’s had me down. Kayla’s bullshit chirping has had me down. It’s a testament to what I am capable of as a wrestler that I keep overcoming all of this. Kayla being a coward has basically pushed me to the edge…”

“It doesn’t matter what she thinks! It’s what you…”

“Save the speech, mother. What matters is that I get her in the ring and shut that bitch up! If that’s what it takes to break the men’s main event supercard streak, then so be it.”

“Just be careful, okay?” my mother suggests, much to my confusion.

“Be careful? Mom, I won today. It’ll be fine.”

“I fear that you may be playing right into Kayla’s hands by going off on her like that tonight. I’m sure she would’ve earned her title shot against you anyway, but you can’t let someone like that get to you. You know how things can snowball in the worst way when you let one person get in your head too much…”

“That was the OLD Julianna, mother…” I said with frustration. “Good night…”

I hung up the phone and I glanced back at the men’s world title match that was hogging up my spotlight. I shut the monitor off still feeling quite bitter and massively unsatisfied.

As much as Kayla’s chirping had really gotten to me on top of everything else, I knew I had to face her eventually…

And that Alexandra HAS to be the last “below par” title defense…

Next Day…

Liam, one of my best friends from wrestling school and who pulled me out of the slumps when my mother threw that surprise celebration for me, was to meet me for lunch. I was alone at the table as he hadn’t arrived yet and on my phone, I was watching the Bombshells Internet Championship match. I shook my head watching Courtney get pinned to lose the title and I had a sudden, glum feeling…

“She kept calling me a nobody and repeatedly said I didn’t deserve the title shot…” I reflected. Upon thinking about my reign so far and how unhappy I was with it, I came to a shocking thought that I couldn’t leave my head. “What if she was right?”

“Hey…” I heard Liam say to snap me out of my melancholy feeling. He sat across the table next to me and before long, our waiter came to get our drink order. Once he left, Liam broke the ice.

“Awesome job last night…” he said, his compliment barely registering with me.

“Don’t say that…” I said, snapping at him and catching him by surprise.

“But…”

“I’m not meeting the standard of a world champion, honestly…” I said, with a bitter chill going down my spine. “...and don’t even THINK of saying otherwise.”

“I don’t think that’s true, but if you don’t want to hear that…”

“Liam, please let me vent for a minute.”

My phone was paused on a screen capture of Courtney being pinned by Tempest and I exited the screen feeling anger toward the stupid bitch.

“Courtney… the bitch I beat for my title… I hate to admit it because she’s really worthless in the grand scheme of things, but her words from months ago got to me more than I let on initially. At first, they didn’t. But… when I retained against her in the rematch the way I did, when my defenses against Mercedes and Bea went the way they did… I’ve had to increasingly fight off the ‘reality’ that maybe Courtney was right all along and that I really don’t deserve what I have. Being the champion in the conditions I’m dealing with is SO much harder than I’ve made it look. I just feel like all I’ve done is prove her right…”

Liam continues to listen.

“You know… I get shit on for shit that SHE never got shit on for and that’s… SHIT! I get the blame for the men main eventing the supercards when that nonsense started with HER reign. People criticize me WAY more than they were criticizing HER when she was the champion. Then she goes and wins another title and she shits all over it, like it means nothing. I know I meant nothing to her because of how she repeatedly kept calling me a nobody…”

Liam wants to reassure me, but I cut him off.

“Liam, please. No compliments. No reassurances. No matter what you say, I’m not going to believe you.”

“Fair, Julianna. But, please do what you need to do to believe the good things people say about you because you are deserving of treating yourself better and being far more positive of how you feel about yourself.”

Finally, I could smile as I felt a warmth in my heart.

“Thank you for saying that. You’re right. I’m trying. Reconciling with the past has been a hard journey for me and I should know better than to let someone as vapid and empty as Courtney Pierce or anyone else in that locker room drag me down to their level. I’ve got some feelings I’ve got to let out, but not right now. The waiter is coming to take our order by the way…”

The rest of the lunch with Liam went well, but what he said at the end really stuck with me. As my journey to figure out the champion I am capable of being continued on, I knew I was in a situation where once again, I had to face up to a past event and/or a past person that tried to anchor me in order to grow, learn about myself and move ahead.

Last Sunday…

The journal was open again as I sat near the sink of the bathroom. But this time, things were a little different. I wasn’t writing to my younger self or just venting in general. I was putting a former grudge I had in SCW to bed once and for all…

“Courtney…” I wrote to the bitch I won the title from.

You are a delusional, vapid, supercilious EMPTY CUNT!”

God, that felt AMAZING to finally let out.

“Nobody…

Among all the other things you said about me. Considering your downfall since I took the belt from you, all the shit you had to say about me meant NOTHING! They never did! Prior to our title match, I never did a damn thing to you, but you just decided to be a JUDGMENTAL CUNT just because I mentioned you by name in like my second promo. All of the problems with my reign are really because of YOU… because I’ve had to pick up the ball YOU dropped while you were champion. I am PASSIONATE about what I do! Unlike you, I show up to TV every week. Unlike YOU, I GIVE A SHIT about this division.

I am a strong, beautiful woman that has blossomed into a hell of a wrestler that has the whole world ahead of her still and what I’ve had to overcome in my reign is a testament to that. YOU on the other hand, were a one shot wonder BITCH who dragged down the division and is THE REAL REASON why the men are always main eventing the supercards. I’ve faced adversity like the way my first two defenses ended (trust me, I HATED that) and I’ve continued to make the most out of the hands I’ve been dealt with as champion.

You? You take home a ‘consolation prize’ and bury it because it’s not the belt you want and then take your damn ball and go home.

But I’M the ‘nobody’, right?

The only difference between you and Krystal Wolfe is that the title you won was the big one but otherwise, you’re both a couple of one reign wonder bitches who are deluded into thinking they are so much better than they actually are. You’re no fucking better than she is. I suppose beating her next Sunday is catharsis because it’s closing our chapter for good. You will ALWAYS be wrong about me! You do NOT get to define me or my reign and that goes for everyone else like Kayla or Krystal that wants to talk shit. Whatever issues we had were always YOU, not me. How fucking DUMB was I to say that you were the reason I arrived in SCW.

I’m through being down about my reign because of people like you and Kayla and because of the way our rematch ended. Since you and Krystal are one and the same for the most part, beating her might as well be beating YOU again.

We can debate about my credibilities as champion all we want, but at least I KNOW how to be a champion… unlike you…

Krystal can blame you for what’s about to happen to her in seven days as far as I’m concerned…

With that, I slid off of the sink and walked over to the toilet. I ripped up the letter I just wrote to her and let the pieces fall into the toilet before I flushed it (and any bitter feelings over that empty, horrible woman and how her words put a damper on my title reign and my own self-worth for a while).

I took a deep breath and instantly felt relieved knowing that I can move forward and that no matter how things went, I was NEVER going to prove that bitch right and that neither her, Kayla or anyone else on the Bombshells roster was ever going to define my worth as a champion or form a dark cloud over my head ever again.

Later…

“I’m sorry mother…” I told her as we talked on the phone later. “...I was being snippy with you because I wasn’t believing in myself, or in my title reign, well enough. I’m basing how I feel about myself and my reign on how other people think of me and circumstances out of my control like the idiot bitches that were interfering in my early title defenses… that and this fear of being a failure that you know I’ve always had…”

I let out a sigh and even paused for a bit as I wondered if my mother was going to say anything back. Once I realized she wasn’t, I kept going.

“I’ve thought about my reign a little bit better and… sure, things can be better but you’re right. I should give myself far more credit for what I’ve been able to make of it in spite of all the obstacles it’s dealt with even if I didn’t get the main event of the supercard last week. That’s it, I guess…”

I waited a little more as some of the guilt with how I treated her the week before was starting to melt away.

“I appreciate that honey…” my mother began. “I understand that someone in the spot that you’re in would have it very hard right about now with everything, especially since you were thrown into the fire with the world title so soon in your SCW run. I understand why you lashed out at Kayla the way you did. Don’t let her, or anyone else, get to you, okay?”

“I should’ve learned that lesson after Courtney instead of feeling like I was proving her right, but I get it now. But, this reign can only get better for me and I can only continue to push until I prove that I am the champion that I know I can be. If I can get Kayla in the ring and beat her in the main event of a supercard, then I know I won’t ever have to be insecure about my title reign again. She’s getting a message loud and clear next Sunday… against someone that not only doesn’t deserve to be in a match with me at all, but also someone that reminds me WAY too much of… well… my younger self and not in the best way…”

“Yeah, Krystal is reminding me of where you were 6 years ago, I’m not going to lie. But, you’ve got this honey. You know I will always believe in you. I’m so glad you’ve grown up over the years because holy crap, if you didn’t, you would’ve ended up just like…”

“Let’s just say I’m glad that I’m not her, okay?” I said with a laugh. “Love you, talk to you later!”

After we hung up, I was definitely on the rebound. With another part of the past, albeit a more recent one in Courtney, being reconciled, I was back on track to progressing forward on this self-empowerment journey that I’ve really needed for years…

March 1, 2024

When the camera came on, that anger was boiling in me again. It wasn’t about my title reign at this point though, but when I thought about Krystal Wolfe, that fire in my heart was just raging. I already knew going in that I didn’t like the woman at all and then having to face her in the ring was something that while I wasn’t looking forward to necessarily, I knew it was an opportunity for a statement. Notably, I was wearing a “Drowning Pool” t-shirt, obviously to make a point.

Time to put this walking identity crisis named Krystal Wolfe in the damn scrap heap…

“I am going to start off by making a reference that someone like Krystal Wolfe would understand. See this shirt here? You remember Drowning Pool, right? ‘Let the bodies hit the floor…’ and all of that? Yeah, as you should know if you’re a metal fan, Drowning Pool was a one hit wonder. They had their one song, their one moment, and they were never able to replicate that. You know why I bring up Drowning Pool, Krystal? Because let’s be honest with each other. You are the ‘Drowning Pool’ of the Bombshells division right now! YOU, Krystal, were a one hit… or I guess in this case… a one REIGN wonder. You had your so called record breaking Roulette Championship reign a few years back… and that’s IT… and that reign was three fucking years ago and yet, you want to act as though you were entitled to the main event scene and that you should get chance after chance but the fact of the matter is, Krystal…

You aren’t entitled to ANYTHING and you sure aren’t worthy of being in the fucking main event scene let alone going up against someone like me. You may have heard, but I’m starting to get sick and tired of sharing the ring with the likes of you. Kayla might as well be the one true challenge I have yet to face in this division, I will be the first to admit that because YOU, Krystal? What kind of challenge are you going to bring? You had ONE reign… ONE… one that wasn’t even GOOD because you never got to the next level during your reign or after your reign and because after that reign came and went, you were tapping out to the likes of decrepit ass Samantha Marlowe! You STILL talk about your Roulette title reign like anyone should give a fuck about it, but tell me why I should give a fuck about it when it was three years ago, when you haven’t been a champion in this company ever since and whenever you have the chance, deserved or not, to take the next step, you NEVER do? WHY should I give a shit about that Roulette reign when nobody even remembers who you beat while you were champion anymore.

No seriously Krystal… who the hell did you beat while you were champion?

Char Kwan?

Who the FUCK is Char Kwan?

You need to make like Jessie Salco and realize that you are what you are and that you peaked during that reign. You can deny it all you want, but the fact of the matter is, when you lost that championship, you lost your identity. You don’t even know who you want to be in this business but you’re going to walk into this match against me most likely thinking that you’re going to be the one that ends my undefeated streak in this company and pull out a massive shocker!

NOT! ON! MY! WATCH!

Because Krystal, you’re THE definition of the little engine that NEVER WILL!

And the worst part is, you do this to your damn self because you try too hard to be relevant in the grand scheme of things. I swear, in the past year, you’ve bounced between being ‘infested by a demon’, some redemption tour, a relapse that had you acting like basically the same bitch you were acting like while you were ‘infested by a demon’, then some wordy, complicated nickname about nightmares or something… you’re a FUCKING MESS, let’s put it that way!”

I take a pause and let out a frustrated sigh before I continued on.

“Six years ago, I was like you. I was the one that was saying and doing stupid shit to get hated just for the sake of being hated and trying so hard to be relevant only to be a running joke that was laughed at all the time. I tried SO HARD to get to the next level at that point in my career and I was always falling down and being everyone else’s stepping stone to the point where one company or two I used to work for at that time wasn’t taking me seriously at all. But you want to call Luna the ‘butt of everyone’s jokes’ when everyone on the roster has been laughing at you for how long?

Yeah, I don’t BLAME the roster for laughing at you…

Not when you’ve only won 4 out of your last 10 matches…

Not when the last time you actually won a singles match was LAST YEAR when you pulled a horseshoe out of your ass to beat Luna and the only win you’ve had since then… PERIOD… was when Tempest was carrying you on her back in that tag match.

Not when you went into massive opportunity matches like the Golden Briefcase and the tournament final against Bella Madison and lost BOTH of those matches….

But you think you can be a main event contender in spite of that because of some ‘record breaking reign’ that nobody cares about anymore. Let me paint you the BIGGEST REASON why it’s like groundhog day for you when it comes to big matches like what I just mentioned and why you keep losing them over and over again…

Ego and massive overconfidence has something to do with that yes…

But the BIGGEST REASON why you’re a CONSTANT CHOKER these days?

You’re a FUCKING HEADCASE and I don’t mean that in any good way at all. Have you even bothered looking in the mirror lately? I mean for fuck’s sake, how many nicknames and identities have you taken on since you lost that title? You hold yourself back in your own mind because you’re too busy getting yourself involved in trivial bullshit nonsense that SHOULDN’T matter like this STUPID THING with Luna about which city in Australia is better, or whining about how the whole roster is wanting to see you get your ass kicked, or bitching about how everyone got on your ass for being a sore loser TWO MONTHS AFTER THE FACT, or whining nonstop about Georgie Robertson and constantly and openly bitching and asking about when she’s going to cash in her stupid briefcase. I mean lord, I could’ve sworn she was also in that Internet title match two Sundays ago… which you of course lost by the way… with how many times you kept bringing her and the damn briefcase up.

You want to know how many times I’ve mentioned Georgie Robertson in 2024 in the context of when she’s going to cash in the Golden Briefcase? ZERO! You’re over there obsessing with her over a title that you haven’t even WON that she MIGHT cash in on while I’m minding my own business. During my matches with Bea and with Alexandra, I wasn’t thinking about her at all but NO, YOU’RE constantly worrying about her… and you wonder why you just can’t get to that next level that just may be too high for you to reach. Let me circle back to the ‘sore loser’ thing…

And that pitiful excuse that you made for it…

‘I was frustrated’... you said… as you threw away your stupid ‘post-SIN path of redemption’.

You call it frustration… but how is it frustration when you literally behaved the same way after you couldn’t win the Golden Briefcase match and how you were mocking Bella Madison for losing to me, STILL being on that sore loser shit two weeks after the fact? It wasn’t frustration, Krystal. It was you showing your true colors to the point where it CLEARLY wasn’t you being infested by a demon, it was you being the bitter, angry, jealous bitch that you are because deep down inside, you really have turned into the next Jessie in terms of never being able to reach the pinnacle of this company and not realizing that your ceiling is far lower than you thought it was. Hey idiot, if you want to redeem yourself for your wrongs maybe… I don’t know… DON’T MAKE THE SAME WRONGS ALL OVER AGAIN?

It’s funny how you were talking about being on this path of redemption and then you lost that match to Bella, then the true colors came out after everyone else, including me, rightfully called you out on your shit. But hey, the most delusional Bombshell on the roster humorously think she has the right to call Courtney Pierce delusional.

Don’t get me wrong, she IS delusional, but someone like you doesn’t even have the right to point that out considering you’ve spent months and months, if not years, walking around the locker room and posting your social media shit acting as if you are far superior than what you actually are. You seem to have blindly acknowledged this yourself when you went into that four way talking about how you were the one person in that match with nothing to lose than more of your pride…

…yeah, you’ve fallen on hard times and even YOU know that and clearly, everything that you are doing with the constantly changing nicknames and monikers kind of makes sense because you’re clearly desperate for ANY grasp of real relevance….


I mean, when you’ve fallen so far down the ladder that pride is really all you have left to lose then you clearly have collapsed… so that tells me that you’re going to come into this thing desperate for a win and thinking that you get to use me as a stepping stone back to this faux relevance that you had when you were the ‘record breaking Roulette Champion’. If you don’t even know what kind of wrestler or a person that you want to be, then how in the world are you in any sort of mental capacity to even win against me at all? Deep down, you’re feeling like the piece of shit that you actually are and you’re willing to do anything to be a champion again. And you know what the sad thing is, Krystal? It is entirely possible, if not PROBABLE, that you will never hold a singles championship in Sin City Wrestling again. What leg do you have to stand on? The Golden Briefcase?”

I scoffed at this joke that I made before I began to wrap up what I had to say.

“It’s ironic… you being such a sore loser about that match when it wasn’t a match you deserved to be in, in the first place.

Hell, when it came to that four woman tournament in which you lost to Bella Madison… honestly? What were you even DOING in that tournament? You went in there and beat Luna and suddenly, you were thinking that you had a free ticket to face me just because Bella had never beaten you before up until that point…

Then you lost that match and you choked in a big match opportunity again just like you have done every single time since you lost the Roulette Championship. Face the facts, Krystal. You peaked with that title reign and that title reign wasn’t even THAT GOOD or THAT MEMORABLE. So, here’s the score for this coming match and I want you to listen to this part real good….

What happens Sunday is going to play out exactly like it would’ve had you won against Bella: in which I defeat you and I move forward to be the best champion that I deserve to be.

You’re going to lick your wounds and go back to the drawing board just like you always do and you’re going to see whether you’re able to come up with yet another new gimmick or another new nickname or another new ‘thing’ to move forward with.

And me? Personally? I am going to send a message to the damn Bombshells locker room that they are DONE with their shit about me! I am going to make it very clear that I have no more patience for their hypocrisies, their lack of ambition, or their jealousy toward me. You get to be the one to deliver that message, Krystal. That’s all the worth you have for me, if we’re being honest. I have had it with facing the same old, same old. I’ve had it with facing bitches that don’t even deserve to be in the same ring with me. I’ve had it with ungrateful, passionless challengers that don’t grow or evolve, I’ve had it with challengers that face me and waste the damn PRIVILEGE to not just have a shot at my title, but also the PRIVILEGE of being in the ring with someone like me.

YOU, Krystal, are going to be the final straw as far as the lack of respect I get around here from just about everyone in this god forsaken division! Because I’ll say this… my title reign will NOT be defined by the fact that I’ve had to deal with people like YOU that could never be good enough to even come CLOSE to winning my championship… especially from me!

It’s high time I step up and NOT have to deal with idiots like you who don’t know what their glass ceiling is! Well no worries Krystal…

On Sunday? You WILL realize exactly how low your ceiling is and FINALLY realize that you truly ARE the new Jessie in every worst possible way!

So quit trying to make yourself HAPPEN… you as a main event player WILL NEVER HAPPEN!"

I angrily shut off the camera and take a deep breath, realizing just how sick and tired I’ve become of being in the rings with the likes of Bea, Mercedes and Krystal…

4
Climax Control Archives / A Reconciliation With Myself
« on: January 12, 2024, 11:58:15 PM »
January 8

Visiting my mother was of course, routine. But on this night, following my return from Colorado to San Diego, my mother was very adamant about me coming over. This wasn’t like her unless she had something important to tell me so from that alone, I was feeling nervous as I was pulling up in her driveway. I noticed the street had more cars than normal, but I didn’t think anything of it. I wasted no time getting out of my car to her front door, ringing the doorbell.

Pretty routine… until my mother opened the door and I heard a loud “SURPRISE” coming from people inside. I was frozen in shock when I saw that there was a celebration for me with balloons, banners and the whole nine yards.

“What are you waiting for? Come in…”

I still didn’t know what to say as I walked in and I saw my High Stakes victory playing on my mother’s television screen. Christy and Ally were quick to join me and they were quite happy.

“It’s a celebration…” Ally said!

“Of YOU!” Christy added

I merely rolled my eyes at this catching them off guard.

“I HAD a celebration yesterday in the ring, you know…” I reminded them.

“You did… but it got interrupted and I wasn’t very happy with that…” my mother said. “For everything you’ve done in SCW so far, you deserve your moment, your celebration, without anyone interrupting you…”

I wasn’t feeling all too comfortable with this but I didn’t have time to think on it when the ‘other familiar faces’ approached to greet me, starting with a woman just a bit older than my mother.

“Oh Julianna… how precious! You adorable thing!”

“Hi to you, aunt Justine…” I said, rolling my eyes at my mother’s sister.

“When are you going to find a good man, Julianna?” my aunt asked me. “I know you got experimental with a woman once and it ended badly…”

“Can it, Justine…” my mother said, cutting in before I could get pissed off.

“She’s not getting any younger, Elise…” my aunt says as she leaves.

“Neither are YOU…” my mother quips back. “Julianna, I’m sorry…”

“She was always the crazy aunt…” I said, still feeling uncomfortable about the whole thing. I greeted a few old classmates of mine from my wrestling school days that were invited afterward and even an old friend from high school: pale, broody and still as gothic chic looking as I can remember…

“Missed you at our 10 year high school reunion…” she told me.

“No you didn’t, Brandi…” said to my old friend. “You forgot I existed after graduation.”

“We can let all of that go, right? I mean you’re a success story! That’s something to be happy about!”

“Yeah… sure. We’ll talk later, I guess.”

“GREAT! And congrats on ALL of your success with your dream! I really mean that! What you’re doing is incredible!”

I didn’t feel too much joy in my heart… at least not until Brandi walked away from me. My mother was already noticing that I wasn’t into the whole thing.

“Julianna, I understand you inherited your father’s demeanor when it comes to celebrating yourself, but you have to at least try to be cheerful.”

“I don’t know mother, this feels so tacky.”

“Do you feel like you’re not worthy of something like this? You looked quite comfortable before that idiot interrupted you.”

“Alexandra is not an idiot.” I quipped.

“But for her to disrespect you like that…”

I sighed and started to feel angry at this point but that anger was interrupted by a particular guy that I was very familiar with from my wrestling school time. Unlike the others, I could actually feel SOMEWHAT happy seeing him.

“LIAM? Oh my god, it’s been forever!”

“Julianna!!!! Holy shit, Christmas 2016 right?”

“YEAH! Just before I got signed and went  mainstream for the first time. How’ve you been?”

“Well, wrestling didn’t work out great for me but I’m doing better now. I obviously don’t need to ask how you’re doing. I knew everyone back then was full of crap when people in that school were saying that you were only doing well because your dad was the head trainer. From the moment I saw you, I knew you had it in you to do the special things you’ve done in your career.”

“Thanks…” I said, completely off guard. “I try…”

“Julianna…” my mother says with increasing frustration. “We’re trying to be happy for you but it’s really hard when you are hardly happy for yourself.”

“Mom, really? In front of my friends? How old do you think I am? 16?”

“You’ve been acting like it since you’ve been here. I went out of my way to do this for you after yesterday when you got your moment stepped on and if I were you, I would’ve beaten the hell out of her for disrespecting me like that. At least in my day, that’s what most wrestlers would’ve done.”

“You know what mother… I don’t want to hear it. I’m really not in the mood to celebrate and I’m sure not in the mood to be lectured. SORRY I got caught off guard and don’t know how to feel about this. Did you think that maybe I didn’t WANT something like this? Forget it, don’t answer. I want to be left alone…”

“Julianna…”

I didn’t give my mother a chance to say another word before I bolted down the hallway and into what used to be the bedroom I grew up in. I slammed the door shut and locked the door and I was even puzzled at myself at the fact that I walked in here instead of just getting in my car and leaving. Sighing, I went to my old dresser with a mirror on it. I looked at myself for a second before I glanced at pictures of my early mainstream career from 2017 and 2018. I was feeling even more glum when I looked at my own reflection and started talking to it.

“You don’t feel like you even deserve this celebration do you?”

Something on the dresser caught my eye however: a page out of an old diary of mine where I had written something back in early May of 2018. I read a few words and my eyes widened.

“Oh crap, this was after I lost a match to… oh god, what was her name again? EXACTLY! This was when I lost a match to a complete NOBODY that was wrestling in her first mainstream match ever. What was her name again? Cheyenne something?”

It was hard to read that page out of my old diary because what I was reading was me calling myself derogatory, self-abusive terms and referring myself as “worthless”, as “someone that should retire immediately”, as someone that will “always prove Dad right” and most harshly “a stupid, useless, garbage excuse of a wrestler that is a living, breathing abortion and is probably the worst professional wrestler alive.”

My hands were shaking. I remember writing that letter to myself prior to that defense against Bella and that’s when I realized it was a pattern.

“Was my mother right out there?” I asked with a sigh. Suddenly, I was reflecting on so many things. I began to realize that perhaps my mother had a point both tonight and prior to my defense against Bella. I was remembering therapy sessions with Dr. Montgomery from years ago where he said that I had a tendency to be a perfectionist.

“I’ve always been so hard on myself…” I admitted in my mind. “Even with all the success that I gain, it never feels like it’s enough. I still feel like I need to prove something. I mean look at me! I did some amazing things when I signed with SCW, my mother wants to be happy for me and throw a celebration for me. She goes the whole nine yards including getting people I haven’t seen in years to come by, and my thanks to her is being alone and not enjoying my success?”

I took a sigh before I continued to think further…

“Oh right, Dad always drilled it in my head that enjoying your success too much was a sign of weakness for a wrestler. His whole mantra was celebrate what you earned, go to bed, wake up the next day, and just keep going… like nothing happened…”

I glanced at the diary entry I wrote back in May of 2018. I still had a few sentences left. The remaining sentences were largely cringeworthy… your typical 23 year old angst of someone who wasn’t even close to grown up just yet and a reminder of why I largely hate my younger self as far as this business is concerned. But the last bit spooked me to the point where tears were suddenly streaming down my face…

“If I can’t beat someone in their FIRST MAINSTREAM MATCH EVER… then maybe I’m nothing… maybe I’m always going to be nothing… maybe I am meant to be a joke in professional wrestling…

I’m horrible…

I’m weak…

I’m nothing but a failure…

And honestly, I just want to go to bed and say ‘please God, don’t let me wake up tomorrow…’

That last sentence especially… was a tear jerker for me. I went from being angry at my younger self for being ‘weak’ to straight up feeling sorry for her.

“I need to stop being so hard on myself…” I said through my own tears. “I can’t keep basing my happiness and how I feel about myself over stupid, irrelevant nonsense that happened five or six years ago. What should I tell her, honestly? If I could go back in time and talk to her, what would I tell her about the future? Because this old diary thing… it was a cry for help when I wrote this… it really was. To go from that rock bottom that I was in, where I felt like I was better off not waking up the next morning all over a loss to a greenhorn I should’ve beaten, to where I am today? I don’t know… maybe that IS something worth celebrating…”

Before I could think any further on the past, I was interrupted by a knock on the door. I let out an angry sigh thinking it was my mother likely annoying me but…

“Julianna?” I heard the voice of Liam, my old wrestling school friend, from the outside. “Is everything okay in there?”

I dried my eyes as quickly as I could and actually tore up the diary entry, which did make me feel a little better. I walked toward the door to open it and he looked concerned right away.

“Have you been crying?” he asked me.

“What? Me?” I said with a nervous laughter. “NO. It’s allergies…”

“Allergies…”

“I haven’t been in this room so long so clearly all the dust bunnies are out and about now that I’ve walked in here for the first time in way too long.”

“Right. Do you mind if I come in for a second?”

“Fine…” I said as I opened the door to let him in. We both sat next to each other at the edge of my bed. “I’m sorry about out there. I had a moment and… it’s dumb, honestly. I just didn’t feel like I was worthy of being celebrated…”

“Julianna, are you kidding me?” Liam asked, obviously perplexed. “You’re on a streak of dominance unlike anything SCW has seen in a while. You’re a world champion over there for god’s sake and you won it on their grandest stage in just your sixth match in the company. How is that not celebration worthy?”

“It’s just not, okay? If it was, maybe it wouldn’t have gotten interrupted.”

“That did bug you a bit, didn’t it?” Liam asked with a laugh. “I don’t think one thing has anything to do with the other. Alexandra didn’t interrupt you because you’re not celebration worthy. I’ve watched your SCW run from day one. I understand. You’re used to other people in that division treating you like crap and calling you names and throwing low hanging fruit at you.”

“Yeah, you’re right about that.” I admitted. “Oh you’re a NOBODY, Julianna…. Oh you don’t DESERVE the title shot… oh Julianna, NOBODY CARES about you…”

I continued on my tangent with my voice having an increasingly mocking tone of my critics.

“Oh Julianna… they did that tournament to make people CARE about you. Oh the world title is held by ‘whatshername’. Oh Julianna is a fraud champion this… oh Julianna is a fluke that… UGH… I mostly let that shit roll off my back but after a while… it REALLY starts to annoy you. That’s the type of nonsense I deal with ALL the time and that’s not even including the time my predecessor as champion tried to undercut me by getting an instant rematch against me two weeks after I beat her for the title I have now. I know I’ve made it look easy, Liam… but the truth is? It’s not even close to that. I know that this is what it’s like to be on top. This isn’t my first rodeo with that. But my goodness, I haven’t met a bunch of bitches this catty since… god maybe ever!”

Liam laughs at this rather than get annoyed with me.

“You put up with plenty, I’ll give you that.” he tells me. “You take too much in my book. I understand that it comes with the territory. Nobody likes to be referred to as ‘a nobody’. Nobody in your position would like to be on the receiving end of a bunch of white noise. But you and I both know that noise is all it really is. People say those things about you because that’s all they got. You’ve really got a bunch of women there that don’t carry the passion that you do. If they carried the passion that they claim they do, they’d actually know what you’re all about. But instead, they just throw these phony phrases at you like ‘nobody’ and say that ‘nobody cares about you’ because they have nothing else. You overcome that nonsense week after week and it’s child’s play compared to what your dad used to put you through.”

“Yeah…” I admitted with a smile. “You got that right. That being said, I just wanted to make it clear that what those idiot bitches have to say about me isn’t necessarily what had weighed me down. I guess being a little tired of hearing the same old shit and just not saying it did. I should be kinder to myself…”

“Your mother was just telling me that out there…”

“Of course she was…” I said with a more playful eye roll. “But she’s not wrong. I’m used to being crapped on for every little thing… which on one hand is good because all the shit those bitches have to say normally goes in one ear and out the other… but then that’s also a bad thing because it makes me ashamed of who I once was.”

“You shouldn’t be, Julianna. Never. You should celebrate who you are and what you’ve overcome to get to where you’re at today. I remember training with you and you being so harsh on yourself and I hated seeing that because you’ve always been so damn good at what you do.”

“Really?”

“I mean every word of it.”

I sigh at this point, more relieved than anything.

“I’m going to make every effort to be kinder to myself… especially the person that I was in 2018. That starts now. Let’s get back to the celebration.”

Liam was happy to hear that and we both left the room together. I did, in fact, continue on with the celebration and I managed to turn around my own vibe. But, as I enjoyed myself that night, I still couldn’t help but think about that ‘rock bottom’ diary entry from years ago that I tore up. It was still bothering me a little that I was THAT hard on myself.

I knew that when I woke up the next morning, my journey was no longer about JUST retaining the title, it was about reconciling my self-esteem and proving to myself that I’m as strong as I’ve shown in my SCW career so far…

January 12

“This has to be some kind of joke, right?”

I couldn’t help but scoff as the camera came in front of me. I was in front of a “Things That Didn’t Age Well” chalkboard with some old Bea Barnhart quotes written on it.

“My first match of 2024, my first title defense of the new year, my fourth world title defense overall, and in all likelihood my 10th win… is BEA BARNHART? Look, Alexandra Calaway coming out and interrupting my celebration is one thing. She wanted to come out and challenge me for my title. FINE! But Bea Barnhart? The one Bombshell on this roster that has never actually earned a title shot of any sort is getting a shot at this? Are you kidding me? I’m a fighting champion and I am not going to back down from any sort of challenge. In fact, I’m not even worried about the stupid Golden Briefcase thing because I know that in any circumstance, Georgie Robinson isn’t good enough to beat me, but Bea Barnhart? WOW! A lesser champion than me would take that as an insult, but all I can do is beat her again. Look, there’s not TOO much that can be said about you Bea.

After all, I am certain that since our last encounter, in which I beat you quite handily by the way, you haven’t evolved a bit. The previous time that I faced you, I pretty much broke down why you are stuck where you were at then and STILL stuck at where you are now. I’d be repeating myself if I did that again so I’m not going to do that. I know that you beat some newcomer at December 2 Dismember and everything, but that doesn’t make you title shot worthy. You’re literally THE Bombshell on this roster that is never going to break the ceiling. I mean, it’s evidenced by the fact that you recently had a Roulette title shot against Georgie and against Alexandria prior to her losing the title to Bobbie Dahl and you failed to attain that. It’s mostly evidenced by the fact that you never learn a damn thing. But you know what, Bea? I want to be nice. I want to celebrate you a little bit…

I mean, it takes a very UNREAL level of STUPID to be you…

I want to celebrate the fact that you could very well be the most Neanderthal, the most stupid bitch that this company has ever employed. Because right behind me, as you can see, are some quotes that you said about me prior to our last encounter that have aged SO BADLY that the stink from all of that cheese is enough to… you know what, if I finish that joke, I will have equalled a Bea Barnhart promo. I’m going to stay above that. But, to celebrate your unreal level of STUPID… let’s break down some of the things that you said about me:

“Destroy Julianna…” HA

You said that you were going to soundly beat me… which you didn’t and when I tapped you out that night, that immediately aged like milk.

I think you even called me a ‘failure’ at some point which I have written down on the board as well.

Yeah, a FAILURE that became the Sin City Wrestling Bombshells World Champion… at HIGH STAKES no less.

“You got lucky…” you once said, when I beat Roxi. Hey idiot, tell me if being an undefeated World Champion is lucky.

“You’re self-destructing…” you said as I was three and zero at the time and showing obviously no signs of slowing down and barely any signs of weakness.

You get the point… or you SHOULD get the point, but considering what I have been saying about how you are probably the dumbest Bombshell in the history of Sin City Wrestling, I don’t think you ever WILL get the point. But see, your stupidity and all of the stupid things that you said about me going into our own match, most of which you pulled out of thin air or out of your ass, it’s not ALL worthless when it comes to this match that we have here this weekend. I have a reason why I highlighted the stupid things you said about me and that reason is that what YOU said going into our last match is a MICROCOSM of what I’ve been talking about with this division. You see Bea, most of the opponents that I’ve faced so far in my career in SCW have been treating me that way. You were trying to treat me like I was nothing which is rich coming from you, and ever since I’ve faced you? I’ve been dealing with people trying to pull things out of their ass against me… over and over and over…

Granted, my last challenger and my next challenger are looking like exceptions to the rule…

But even then…

You’ve got a champion that I dethroned that spent weeks sucking wind and trying to cram down the throats of everyone that was willing to listen that I was a nobody that didn’t deserve the High Stakes World Championship match that I got which is HARDLY different from what YOU said about me going into our last match…

You’ve got people that I had yet to wrestle in this company throwing shade at me calling me a fraud champion all because they were whiny and bitter about the fact that I beat her friend for the belt… which… HA… laughable! Hey, if I’m a ‘fraud’ then what does that make everyone that’s lost to the fraud, right? Are you that stupid and that predictable that I should start taking bets on whether or not you are going to either say something similar to this? Or how about taking bets as to whether you are going to call my win over you a fluke?

You’re that damn predictable Bea, and you know? The sad thing is? You’re also a microcosm of something else…

You’re a microcosm of who I used to be when I first went mainstream. The old Julianna when she was this 22, 23 year old hotshot? Yeah, I admit, I used to act a lot like you. I used to troll so damn much. I used to say things that would make people want to beat my ass. I used to do what YOU always do and that’s make things up out of thin air. I used to be more focused on being a social media presence and antagonizing people and never growing and learning anything because I was stupid as fuck, just like you are now, and feeling like I had everything all figured out even though I was hurting inside every single day. Hell, I am going to feel disgusted saying this Bea, but many years ago when I first started out? I basically WAS you: a glorified troll that refuses to evolve and refuses to grow the fuck up to the point where NOBODY takes her seriously.

With me, it was personal demons and I was able to face those, overcome those, evolve, grow up and then mature into the wrestler that I am today. What’s your excuse, Bea? Hell, what’s your malfunction? You’re more than four and a half years older than me, but match after match, promo after promo, you’re acting like a damn child… you know… like ME when I first started out. Your lack of ability to evolve and to grow past what you are shows me that you don’t value yourself as a wrestler and you definitely don’t value yourself as a person. You just don’t CARE enough to do anything different and I think it’s because deep down, though you’ll never admit it because you prefer to hide behind your ‘comedy’ that is never funny, you know you’re never going to amount to anything beyond what you are. You figure that you’re never going to be a world champion and that you’re never going to be taken seriously by anyone else, so instead of trying to grow up and BE SOMEONE, you just stay stuck doing the same old shtick.

You refuse to even TRY because you’re a COWARD, Bea.

You’re afraid to take any real risks. You’re afraid to evolve.

You’re afraid to leave your comfort zone so rather than take the risk and maybe BE someone for a change, you’d rather stay in it, accept your current reality and do the same old thing over and over and over. I THINK I may have even mentioned something about how you’re the literal “Groundhog Day” of this division too, if I’m not mistaken and that’s the way it’s always going to be. I’m dead serious Bea…

I look at you…

And what I see?

I take a pause before I let out an angry sigh.

“I see the woman I would’ve turned into if I never grew up. I see what my destiny would’ve been as a wrestler and thank god I had it in me to turn the ship around a few years back as I built my way up the ranks of this business. Thank goodness I had the strength to face my own demons and to fight back against them and that’s a fight that I can honestly say still isn’t over because all it takes is one slip up and I’m back on the wrong path again. Well I am NOT going to let THAT happen, Bea! I know that to avoid such a fate, I have to retain this championship against you and that’s something that I AM going to do . I’ve come way too far over my career, building myself up from the bottom, avoiding the CRUEL fate of turning into someone like YOU in the wrestling business, and everything in between to get to this championship that I have today, to lose it all because of someone like YOU! I became the pride of San Diego with what I’ve done in this company while all YOU seem to do is prove why the Philippines should’ve stayed a United States territory because my god, if you’re a microcosm of that country, then that country is too fucking moronic to be independent…

I managed to find a way to reconcile everything to become a better version of myself because I faced my problems and I fixed my problems while you, Bea, are the most delusional bitch in the company, living in denial and not even ACKNOWLEDGING your own problems let alone facing them. But hey, if you’re truly happy being the clown queen of this company, then be my guest. It won’t make a difference to me whether you’re a clown or whether you finally put your big girl pants on and grow the hell up because ultimately? I am going to beat you again. I’ll move forward. I’ll deal with Alexandra Calaway and whether she or anyone else likes it or not, I’m going to continue to grow. I’m going to continue to be the new standard bearer of this division. I’m going to continue to push myself any way I can to be better than the next day and the next match. I’m going to continue to learn how to be grateful for myself and everything that I’ve faced and overcome to be the champion and the much stronger person that I am today than I was six years ago.

THAT, I feel, is something worth celebrating…

Beating you on Sunday? Well, it’s YOU…

I wouldn’t necessarily celebrate beating you because you’re barely worth celebrating over to be honest.

But the rewards of winning the match?

You know… remaining the world champion…

Getting four championship defenses?

My last FIVE matches in this company being a world title match with every single one of them being wins?

Going a clean 10 and zero which is almost unheard of in SCW?

THAT, Bea, is something worth celebrating.

When I beat you again, Bea? It’ll be a message… an EXAMPLE… to the rest of the roster that contrary to what they think… or in some cases, contrary to what people want…

I’m not going anywhere anytime soon…

And I’m definitely not planning on losing this title soon… especially to someone like YOU!

Come Sunday?

I’m silencing all the empty words and petty hate yet again and showing exactly why I AM the fucking head of the class around here!

I chuckled a bit, largely because I was impressed that I was able to find much to say about “Boring” Bea Barnhart. Needless to say, I was feeling pretty good about Sunday and reaching that vaunted 10-0 mark as I shut off the camera and went about my cold, chilly Colorado evening…

 

5
Climax Control Archives / Nostalgia Act
« on: November 24, 2023, 06:51:42 PM »
November 22, 2023

In all honesty, while I was happy that I was able to retain against Courtney Pierce two weeks after I had defeated her for the championship at High Stakes to begin with, I wasn’t happy about Ariana Angelos’s involvement because I knew in my heart that I didn’t need it in order to beat her again. But this coming week, I didn’t have time to dwell on it. Mercedes Vargas was the next defense coming up this Sunday and while I definitely have had my time to prepare and to think about the challenge ahead, in this moment?

I’m doing something nice for my mother…

“I’m sure your mom will appreciate the fact that you made some space for her to stay whenever she likes…” Christy, one of my two best friends says as I have a bit of a smile on my face.

“Yeah! I mean, she’s been through so much lately and the fact that you’ve been there for her so she wouldn’t be lonely. It really is a nice change in you…” Ally adds.

“I still have some stuff to move…” I admit as I go to the last corner of the room that needed to be emptied. My eyes widened a bit when I realized I was looking at a nostalgia trip. There were some pictures of memories from the promotions that I’ve been part of over the years. But, when I saw some photos and memorabilia stemming from my time in New Generation Wrestling and Portland Pro, I rolled my eyes.

“Dumpster please…” I said with a sigh. Ally wasn’t long in bringing a large garbage can but she and Christy were shocked when I took everything from those two companies and dumped it all in the trash.

“Woooow….” Christy said.

“That was literally the worst time of my life…” I reminded my two best friends. “Why would I want to keep anything from those two companies?”

I scoffed as I looked to clear more stuff and I opened a box that was on a dresser. My eyes narrowed with some type of bitter anger.

“Oh…” I said with an angrier sigh as I saw memories from Mainstream Wrestling. I was glancing at pictures of my US championship win, my Pinnacle battle royal win, my world title win, and replicas of both of the aforementioned titles along with a handful of awards I won during my time there. Suddenly, I was swept by an internal sadness as I looked at my left hand and saw my Hall of Fame ring from my induction there last year.

“Jules?” Ally asks with concern. “Is everything okay?”

The one picture in the box that I wouldn’t stop staring at was the moment that the Mainstream World Championship was lost.

“Julianna… you’re looking like a ghost…” Christy adds.

“This should’ve been my wrestling home for the remainder of my career…” I said regarding Mainstream Wrestling. “...but they ruined it for me…”

I stared at that picture further. All of that hurt, all of that anger, all of that embarrassment was coming back to me…

…the moment I lost that world title… which that in and of itself was harsh enough.

“...I was the final chapter in someone else’s retirement story…” I said, with a little more anger in my voice. “...I lost that title to a nostalgia act that got to retire as champion…”

“Oh no…” Ally says, knowing what’s wrong. “Jules, that was nearly two and a half years ago…”

“Don’t ‘two and a half years ago’ me, Ally! Do you realize how much that hurt me? I was doing pretty damn good as the Mainstream World Champion! I was turning back every challenger that was coming my way. But then this retiring piece of trash comes along and gains one last moment at my expense… and my entire reign… everything that I built up… all of my hard work… it meant NOTHING!!!!!!!”

“Jules, you know that…”

“Christy… I STILL feel that way. My entire title reign over there was reduced to being someone else’s glory… and I’ll be DAMNED if I allow that to happen to me AGAIN this Sunday…”

“Mercedes isn’t planning on retiring though…”

“It’s not THAT different!” I said, with anger rising in my voice. “I can’t look at this trash… and trash is where this belongs.”

I was about to dump the box of my Mainstream memories in the trash, but Ally pulled back the can.

“Julianna… NO! You can’t trash that!”

“Mainstream Wrestling was when you really began to make a name for yourself….” Christy reminds me. “I know your first title reign ended horribly and I understand why you feel the way you do, but that doesn’t mean trash it. I don’t blame you for leaving that place when you lost the title…”

“Plus, you forgave them when you went back there…” Ally

I could only laugh at this reminder.

“Yes, that place is where I began to really grow into my own but if it’s so fucking special, when how come come I left? I know the answer as to why I did…”

I paused, soaking in much of the heartbreak that I was still feeling from that place. It was incredibly difficult for me to look back at what was otherwise a strong portion of my career. It was painful to the point of nearly coming to tears remembering all of the amazing times that I had, how jubilant and happy that I was when I became a world champion and how confident I felt the more I defended that title. But the most painful part of all was how it all ended way too soon. What was burning in the back of my brain was how nothing was ever the same after my reign was reduced as a stepping stone to someone else’s big retirement moment… and how I was reduced to just another wrestler on the roster afterward….

“...how come I didn’t stay when I went back?”

Christy and Ally awkwardly looked at each other before they looked back at me.

“...let me tell you of the night I finally decided to call SCW back…”

February 2023

Mainstream Wrestling was holding a luncheon before their show in East Lansing and while the food was great, I was isolated and miserable. I was holding a glass of punch watching everyone else in the company mingle. I could feel it in the pit of my stomach that I wasn’t happy to be there.

“Why did I bother coming back?” I think to myself. “I should be treated like a bigger deal than they treat me. I’m a former world champion. I’m even a Hall of Fame member here, damn it! Yet, they continue to act like I’m just another face on the roster. They continue to insult my intelligence and continue to think that because I’m a Hall of Fame member, that I have nothing left to achieve. They hired all these bimbos in the room to replace me and they moved on acting like nothing I did here matters…”

“Julianna, hello…” a management official says, catching my by surprise. “You’re all alone. Is everything okay?”

“Nothing has been okay here since I lost the World Championship more than a year and a half ago…”

“Oh Jesus, Julianna. You’re still not over that?”

“Sir, kindly hear me out…”

“Okay…”

“I lost the world title to someone that got to retire as champion and it was so humiliating for me that I left because I know I am better than being reduced as a footnote to someone else’s journey. But between that loss and my departure, I wasn’t booked in another match. There was a tournament for the vacant title that you left ME out of… and I thought, hey maybe I could face the tournament winner or something. Nope. You picked someone else even though I had the right to a rematch.”

The official was starting to look very uncomfortable.

“It angered me and I left. Let me remind you sir, that you called ME when it came to the Hall of Fame and coming back here. I didn’t call you because I didn’t need you. YOU… called me! I’m willing to let bygones be bygones so I accept my Hall of Fame ring and what have you done with me? You’ve booked me in singles matches against mainly nobodies. You’ve booked me in clusterfucks. I feel like you brought me back just so I can be the stepping stone to all of these bitches you hired after I left…”

“No no… it’s not like that at all…” Mainstream’s representative says. “I understand why you would feel underappreciated and why you feel like a stepping stone. But I promise you, you’re not. I’ll tell you what, how about I give you something you’ll appreciate.”

“Which is?”

“A shot at the Mainstream Television Championship…”

He suddenly became spooked when I looked at him like I wanted to murder him.

“Come again?” I asked.

“...I want to give you another shot at the TV title…”

“FUCK YOU!” I screamed as I flipped over the dessert table, spilling and breaking everything that was on it and catching the attention of everyone else, who looked completely stunned. “I don’t WANT a shot at the FUCKING TV TITLE…”

“Julianna calm down…”

“DON’T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN! The TV title is a FUCKING INSULT! I NEVER got my rematch for the world title and if you want to make it up to me, THAT’S what you fucking give me! Don’t low ball me with this crap about the TV title!”

“You have to earn it, Julianna…” he said, panicked, ticking me off further.

“Stop fucking LYING to me…” I snapped back. “Why won’t you just tell me that you brought me back to be a nostalgia act? Because that’s exactly what you did. I busted my ass for this company the first time I was here and rose up the ladder and all you’ve done is start me off at fucking square one acting like what I accomplished here doesn’t matter! I WAS, and still SHOULD BE, THE top woman in this company but all you give a shit about is turning me into a stepping stone to make women lesser than I am look SO much better than they actually are and I am WAY better than being told to be a stepping stone to bitches that will NEVER measure up to me or the impact that I made here!”

“You’ve got it all wrong…” he says with a nervous laugh.

“Oh do I? Then how come you’re shoving me down the ladder to compete for the TV title… a title that means NOTHING to me? How come you’re throwing me in these random ‘title contendership clusters’ with at least five other wrestlers when I should’ve gotten a rematch for the world title when I walked right back in the door…”

“...you STILL have to earn that…”

“Even though YOU shut me out of a rematch after I lost to the fucking nostalgia act?”

“Well… um…”

“The moment I lost that title, you wanted to move on from me like I was worthless trash and you wanted to focus your company around the good ol’ boys club again. Now that I’m back, you want to treat me like I’m past my prime! For FUCK’s sake, I’m only 28!.”

“Julianna… please! I’m almost begging you at this point. Give things time! Things will get better! You worked your way up the ladder and there’s no doubt that you’ll do it again! Just please give us time…”

“I’ve given you ENOUGH time…” I said as I began to walk away. “I’m DONE!”

“Julianna, PLEASE!”

“No, I’m DONE! FOR GOOD! I am NOT your fucking nostalgia act and I am NOT someone to throw away as a thing of the past! I’m DONE with your fucking games! I’m going to go somewhere else and SHOW YOU what you’re missing out on! GOOD RIDDANCE!”

I burst through the door leading to the parking lot, leaving the luncheon, and Mainstream Wrestling, for good. On a whim, I dialed a Nevada based phone number I saved on my phone.

“Hello?” I said after a deep breath. “Hi! It’s Julianna DiMaria. Can you get Mark or Christian to call me back ASAP? Yeah… I’m a free agent now…”

Little did I know when I placed that bet on myself and left Mainstream for SCW, I would hit the jackpot…

November 22, 2023

“They really did suck your passion dry with the way they were treating you…” Ally admitted.

“They took you for granted…” Christy added. “But we’re so glad you got that passion back and look at you know…”

“I’m not going to let it happen again…” I said with anger in my voice. “I’m not about to lose another world title to another nostalgia act. That experience in Mainstream… it still fuels me, girls. It’s motivating me to continue to show those people what they missed out on even though they are dead and buried. And speaking of dead and buried…”

I picked up the box consisting of my Mainstream Wrestling memories and was about to make another attempt at the trash can…

“JULIANNA” both of my friends exclaimed. “Don’t…”

“I want NOTHING to do with that fucking company EVER again! It means NOTHING to me anymore! Why should I remember something that never appreciated me and was willing to throw me away so fast? They basically told me that all of my hard work and all the dedication I gave to that company was meaningless. It’s all meaningless, girls…”

“That’s not true…” Christy says. “Did it end how you wanted it to? No. But that’s the place where the world truly came to know what Julianna DiMaria is all about.”

“You can’t take that away from them…” Ally says. “It made you stronger and better in the long run… or at least overcoming what they put you through and how they mistreated you did.”

“Yet, the anger… the heartbreak… it’s still in my soul. Like I said earlier, they were supposed to be my home for life…”

“Don’t you think SCW can be that for you?” Christy adds, triggering something in me that finally got me to calm down even a little bit. “They get to be what Mainstream should’ve been. You can retire tomorrow and they’ll never forget what you accomplished in just six short matches there.”

“Yeah, hashtag “Jules in Six” is never going away… and nobody can take it away from you. It’s literally your best career moment that overshadows everything in Mainstream. Period! You PROVED you were always better than them. Take pride in that!”

“Yeah, Ally’s right, Jules. You made the right move to move on. Be better than them still. Trashing them makes you just as bad.”

I let out a soft sigh at this point as I removed my Hall of Fame ring from my hand and tossed it in the box with all the other memories. This spooked them for a moment.

“Girl, don’t throw that ring in the trash…” Ally says.

“I won’t…” I said with a reluctant sigh. “Tape that up and take it downstairs to the storage room, will you? At least there’s SOME value with that which is more than I can say for those other two companies I dumped in the trash”

My best friends were the ones breathing a sigh of relief now. They both nodded at me and took the box out of the room and down the stairs. I went to the corner and sat down on it, briefly reflecting on a part of my journey that I was hating for its ending, yet was able to come to terms with it a little bit even if I wasn’t fully over it yet.

“Mainstream will always be where I won my first and where I started to realize my potential…” I admitted in my thoughts. “But that pathetic, small time company was just a stop along the way that’s being overshadowed by what I’m doing now…”

I could finally smile remembering the great times that are ongoing in SCW.

“Mercedes isn’t going to have one last moment of glory at my expense…”

I held that determination inside of my as that title match drew closer…

November 24, 2023

I had the camera on me as I stayed in my luxurious room in the Biltmore Hotel in Phoenix, not far from Tempe. Mercedes Vargas was firmly on the brain now… but so was the experience in my past with how my first World Championship reign as a professional wrestler ended to a retiring coward. This was fueling my motivation and my anger as I began to express my thoughts…

“Nearly two and a half years ago, long before I came to SCW, I lost my first world championship to an over the hill piece of shit that just wanted one last moment of glory. This Sunday? I’m in that same situation facing someone like that… and YES… Mercedes… I am talking about you. JUST like that person that beat me back in July of 2021, you are NOT deserving of this title shot in front of you. You are NOT deserving to the main event spotlight. But UNLIKE then, I AM going to win this time. I AM going to turn away the nostalgia act and I am NOT about to allow YOU to have one last spark at my expense. That’s not going to happen! I REFUSE to let it happen. I know that when I got my title shot, there was all of this talk about how I didn’t deserve it! I recall people talking about how I was basically the least deserving Bombshell on the roster. But they shouldn’t have been talking about ME, Mercedes! They should’ve been talking about YOU!

After all, 2023 is almost over and you’ve only won FOUR matches… FOUR! I have won nearly DOUBLE the matches during my run of dominance than you have ALL YEAR and I’ve only been here since the damn summer! Add on the fact that literally HALF of your wins are against Samantha Marlowe and Seleana Zdunich, the other two women that I called WASHED a couple of Climax Controls ago, and I am honestly wondering what the fuck you’re still doing on this roster. It can’t be passion because from what I have studied about you, you’re literally the same person now that you were ten years ago with little, if any, hints of evolving as a professional wrestler. It can’t be the fact that you’ve even improved because holy hell, when was the last time you held a singles match in this company? I get it. You were a GRIME World Champion in Sin City Underground, but that’s like winning the EFL Championship across the pond: cool story bro… but all it proves is that you can win in the B league. The last time you were even a champion in SCW at ALL was when you were a Mixed Tag champion being carried by your partner… but SOMEHOW… you’re worthy of a title shot? Are you kidding me?

Even Mercedes and Seleana have been a singles champion in SCW more recently than you have! When it comes to being at the top tier of this division, even YOU would admit that you don’t have what it takes to be there anymore and it’s not just ME saying it. The bitch is, even though you’ve skirted and contradicted yourself on the subject, even YOU have said it yourself not just with your words, but with your actions. What’s the supposed most decorated Bombshell in SCW history doing wasting her time with Harper Mason, huh? Why is someone of your supposed caliber picking on teenagers and beating them with Singapore canes? What’s the matter? You’re afraid that you can’t beat the big fish anymore? Hell, I’d even say you’re afraid you can’t beat anyone other than rookies or the likes of Sam, Sel and Bea. But even with all of that, I’m going to say that the biggest reason why you don’t deserve this shot… and ultimately… why you WILL fall short against me?

Look, it’s not just how strong of a wrestler I am or the fact that I’m at the peak of my powers. It’s not even the fact that you’ve lost so many times this year, primarily. It’s because you don’t have the RESOLVE anymore! Yes, I AM questioning your resolve because one just needs to listen to your words from High Stakes to know that even YOU know you don’t stand a chance against me. No matter WHAT you say? You know… in your SOUL… that you don’t because prior to High Stakes? Yeah, I saw you admit that you weren’t mentally ready for High Stakes as you bitched and moaned about how you hadn’t won at that event in nearly a decade. So if you admitted you’re not mentally ready for that big stage, how can you possibly be ready for me? I saw you complain to Sam about how you’re both being passed over for ‘new flavors of the month’...”

I paused to scoff for a bit before I continued on.

“Reality check Mercedes… it’s not being passed over… it’s being passed BY! The ‘new flavors of the month’, especially me, have passed you by and I wouldn’t be shocked of Harper turns out to be another one that does. Someone that whines about being passed over has no resolve to make their situation better… especially when you’re questioning as to whether it’s even WORTH IT anymore. I mean… GOSH Mercedes, it sounds like going into your High Stakes match you were questioning and doubting yourself so much! Maybe that’s why people like me are passing you by in this company and in this division? You’re over there wondering to yourself if you’ll ever have the Internet Championship… or ANY title… around your waist ever again yet you want to contradict yourself saying that things will turn around you.

Please Mercedes…

Not even YOU believe that…

Not when later in that same promo you admitted you ‘weren’t mentally ready’. How can you believe in a turnaround if you’re not mentally there for it?

But each loss is a ‘learning opportunity’? HOW SO?

You're clearly not learning a fucking thing if you keep losing... and you clearly haven't learned a fucking thing in years considering all the losses you've racked up. You can act all brave and confident if you want, but you clearly showed that this was a front because you're ALREADY doubting yourself as far as being a champion again. If you weren't, you wouldn't be bringing this up at all. So don't come at me with a bunch of false promises and claims that you, yourself, know deep in your heart isn't true and will never come true again.

I mean you know it so damn much that prior to the Queen of the Day match at Violent Conduct, I swear to fucking God, you kept PLEADING and BEGGING for Tempest and Zoey Lukas to be suspended! Hell, your resolve is so weak you couldn’t even maintain your convictions about that match. One day, you’re pleading with the masses that you weren’t looking for an easy way out and the next you’re demanding that Christian suspend your opponents and declare you the winner… which… is an easy way out…

Let me tell you something about having a strong resolve though…

Those with a strong resolve don’t throw stones in glass houses and aren’t the pot calling the kettle black. I mean, going into Violent Conduct, you’re saying Christian has a “soft spot” for Seleana yet I’m wondering if that same “soft spot” applies to you. I mean, it would at least EXPLAIN why you have a title match you clearly haven’t earned or deserved. You’re bagging on Seleana’s win-loss record in 2023 and calling it pathetic… when you’re the one that’s lost more than three times than she’s won this year and once went months without a win. But still… the FUNNIEST thing you said about Seleana? Wasn’t it something along the lines of how she’s getting undeserved opportunities when she should be opening shows against new competition? I mean that’s TRUE, Mercedes, but it SORELY lacks credibility when it’s coming from YOU because OH LOOK… here YOU are getting an undeserved opportunity on Sunday when you should be the first one out of the curtain trading Singapore cane shots with Harper Mason!

But hey, stay in denial Mercedes. Keep saying that SCW needs you more than you need it… which… I think ALL of us can say that’s a fucking joke.

Keep thinking you’re a dynasty… even though you no longer are. I mean, dynasties don’t go YEARS without a championship… and dynasties accomplish more than have a handful of mostly one month long championship reigns like what you have across your career and any semblance of WHATEVER deluded dynasty you once had basically died in my rookie year of being a mainstream wrestler… in 2017. But I suppose I should give you credit to a degree, Mercedes. Because when you’re NOT in denial, and when you’re NOT being delusional, your resolve… brittle as it is, CRACKS… and you actually DO recognize your reality. I mean, how can I take you seriously when you go off on your little speech about how you’re going to win one more World Championship whenever you release your promo when going into your match against Harper Mason, you even admitted that people don’t see you as a threat anymore AND you also admitted that you may not be winning another title anytime soon.

Look, I know you’ve heard the speech about how people overlook you and how nobody believes in you and all of that… and I get it. You’re tired of hearing it because it seems like that’s all you’ve heard for years. But the truth is… I’ve just outlined how you don’t even believe in yourself and maybe THAT’S why you’ve been nothing but stagnant for all these years as Bombshells like me come in, take this place by storm, and pass you by. Maybe that’s why you never TRULY learn from your losses… because all those losses have piled up so badly that not only do you not believe in yourself anymore… but it is that lack of faith in yourself that prevents you from growing with age. Maybe after I defeat you tonight and conquer a couple of demons of my own along the way this Sunday… you may finally begin to wake up and acknowledge how you truly feel about yourself. Whatever insecurities that have leaked out of your mouth and your soul in your recent promos such as High Stakes and your match with Harper, I’m about to take and I am about to amplify them because what I see is a woman that KNOWS she’s cooked, but needs JUST enough of a push to realize that she is and that either she needs to FINALLY grow and evolve… or just admit that she’s overstayed her welcome.

You’ve already lost this match in my book Mercedes… because you don’t think you can win against me. The only reason why you won at High Stakes even though you weren’t mentally ready is because Sam Marlowe has a worse self-esteem issue regarding her career at the moment than you do. You can get away with it against someone like Sam, but against me? The woman that BELIEVED IN HERSELF and KNEW she deserved that world title shot at High Stakes, who MAINTAINED her conviction in herself no matter WHO she faced in that SCW ring along the way, the woman that KNEW she was going to be the ONE that beat “THE ONE”... TWICE… and who KNOWS that she’s the champion that can shake up this division as she has so far? NOPE!

I KNOW going into this title defense that I’m facing a woman that is far more broken about her career and her remaining worth in this business than she will EVER admit and it will be my great pleasure, in my second title defense this Sunday, to be the one that breaks you FOR GOOD… and I’m NOT talking physically, Mercedes… though I am capable of doing that too. I’m talking about psychologically! THAT is where you will be PERMANENTLY broken when I’m done with you. This Sunday? You might as well start calling it the beginning of the Mercedes Vargas Farewell tour… because when I’m done with you? You’re going to go from questioning whether you’ll ever win a title again to REALIZING that you’ll never win a title again… ESPECIALLY the one you’re challenging for on Sunday!

You’re about to find out exactly how weak your resolve has been all along and why someone like you could NEVER… EVER win against someone of my caliber!

I admit that Sunday might not be your swan song exactly…

But maybe, just maybe, when I’m done with you and I break whatever resolve you have left?

I might as well start pushing you to warm the band for that…”

I scoffed once more and maintained my full confidence feeling like Sunday was going to be another notch on my belt in my still-fledgling SCW career…

But most importantly?

I felt like Sunday I was finally about to put some nearly two and a half year demons from before my time in SCW to bed once and for all…

With that thought in mind, I shut off my camera and felt ready to heal from that aforementioned painful experience.

6
Climax Control Archives / Making of a Champion: Part 3
« on: November 03, 2023, 11:42:19 PM »
Two days after High Stakes…

I was waiting to see my mother in the hospital, on my 29th birthday no less. I was still on that high of winning the championship and I was clutching it on my lap.

“How is this going to change me for the future?” I wondered. This wasn’t the norm for me as I remembered how I would largely focus on the past and how much it was driving me. But this championship and my journey to get here certainly had me feeling a little different. Still, I was thinking back to High Stakes and how I was feeling regarding the match.

“I knew I was going to do it all along…” I reflected. “Courtney’s empty words never bothered me. Compared to my father, who loved to say similar about me, she was child’s play. She made every effort she could to bring me down and intimidate me but it turned out to be for nothing. It was like dealing with my father all over again, except so much easier. Normally, I would go into a huge match like High Stakes wanting to prove him wrong… but…”

I reflected for a bit.

“...this hits different. This doesn’t feel like before. I don’t feel like I’ve proven him wrong. I feel like I didn’t even have to. It’s funny because I remember how I felt when I first learned he was gone…”

Two years ago…

I remember being in my mother’s living room as she held a note in her hands. She was shaken. I can tell she had already gone through a round of tears or two. Naturally, I was worried about her and asked her if everything was okay. If only I knew what was about to hit me like a ton of bricks…

“...your father got shot in the head, Julianna…” my mother said to me. Instantly, I went numb as I remembered that I once wished for that to happen to him to his face. “He’s gone… I can’t believe he’s gone…”

The numbness in me wore off and it was replaced by sympathy for my mother. But at the same time, there was this great relief and peace that was sweeping over me. I wasn’t feeling upset that my biggest doubter and my most horrific abuser was gone. I consoled my mother who went into another emotional outburst.

“I know you feel nothing for him… and I understand if you’re not upset that he’s gone. But he wanted me to give you this…”

My mother handed me a note and her eyes widen as she saw I was going to tear it up.

“Julianna… stop! I’ve actually read what it says. I swear on your life it’s not what you expect. It’s not abusive. Please hold onto that.”

I let out an angry sigh.

“For you I will, but that’s it. I’m not going to read this right now. I’m just… shocked. I can’t believe he’s gone. He’s not going to be around to hurt me anymore…”

“That’s true… but please Julianna, do yourself a favor and get to a point where you’ll be ready to read what he has to say. You don’t deserve to carry any anger toward him with you anymore. Work on yourself, honey. Be better than him. I know that he and I weren’t getting along great toward the end and that you and him never had a real relationship, but I knew the kind of man that he was at heart and I loved him very much…”

“I never saw him that way…” I reminded her. “He wanted to drag me down and sabotage my career at every turn…”

“I know he did… but someday, for your sake, that’s something you need to let go…”

I wasn’t happy to hear this, but I was too concerned for my mother to really dwell on it. She was hurting and being there for her in her time of need was all that really mattered in the moment…

Present Day…

I snapped out of my thoughts when the doctor informed me she was ready to see me. As it turns out, that letter, still folded after all this time, was in my hands too.

“Why am I suddenly feeling different about him being gone?” I asked myself as I stood up and walked into my mother’s room. That worry escaped me when she saw each other and we gave each other the biggest hug that I could remember. As we embraced, I could feel my mother’s happiness. It was the strongest sense of happiness she felt toward me… ever…

And with everything going on and with my journey as it happened, her ‘congratulations’ was the greatest thing in the world.

“I knew all along you were going to do it…” she told me, as she beamed with pride. “You did the unthinkable! Nobody believed in you but us, and look what you managed to pull off!”

“This is honestly the greatest thing I’ve ever achieved in my wrestling career…”I admitted. “But like I told you, this is for both of us. I’m not the only one that is the SCW Bombshells World Champion… you are too!”

I could tell just by looking in her eyes that my mother was very touched by this gesture.”

“This title is my ‘thank you’ for everything you’ve ever done for me. You deserve to share this title with me for that, and because you never had a chance to be a world champion in your own right. You do now, mother! This is our title and I’m going to do the best that I will do to make sure this stays with us. Here… let’s take a few pictures, okay?”

I pulled out my phone and sat hip to hip with my mother as I evenly spaced the title belt in front of us. The next few seconds were ncredible happiness, taking those pictures with her, sharing the greatest memory of my career so far with her and subsequently seeing her hold the title on her own and really believing that she too, was a world champion. I took a few pictures of her with the title before putting my phone away.

“Gosh, I’ve never seen you this happy as long as you’ve been alive, Julianna…” my mother says as she laughs through the inescapable tears of joy.

“To be able to do this… for me… for us…” I began, fighting my own tears of joy at this point. “I’ve never had a moment in my career that has meant more to me. This is, without question, the pinnacle of my career so far and… it’s weird to say this… but unlike the other two world titles I’ve won to this point, it didn’t feel like I was proving my father wrong at all.”

My mother’s eyes light up with happiness.

“GOOD! It means that you’re ready to move forward. That title has given you enough confidence to move on and let go of all the pain he ever put you through. It’s time to let him go now…”

I was feeling really weird about this considering that most of my career was basically based on proving him wrong and overcoming all of the abuse he ever put me through.

“Julianna, in order to be the champion I know you can be, you need to move forward. It’s no longer about proving him wrong. It’s about showing the world what you are made of. You’re not new to the responsibility of carrying a company on your back. You’ve done this two different times before. But this time? It’s under a greater microscope and you can’t afford to hold yourself back by dwelling on your father anymore.”

“I never read the letter of his that you gave me…” I admitted.

“You don’t think it’s time to do that? I know what it says and like I told you back when I gave it two you after he died, it’s not what you expect. You don’t even have to read it out loud. I want you to soak it in and see what he really has to say. Give him one more chance to make things right and I promise you it’s going to do great things for you.”

I reached into my purse, revealing the letter.

“I have kept it with me the whole time…’ I admitted. My hand was already shaking.

“You are more than strong enough now, honey…” my mother admitted to me. “This is your moment to prove what kind of champion you can be…”

I took a deep breath and calmed down before I unfolded the letter and began to read it in my head, nerves, anger and all, flowing through my veins.

“Julianna,

I’m sorry…”

My eyes widened with shock reading those two words.

“I am guilty of how awful our relationship has been. I admit that the way I have treated you your entire life was wrong and it’s time for me to be a man and confess that. I am currently missing out on someone real special with you and it’s my entire fault…”

I paused, with a numb shock pervading right through me.

“Is this real?” I asked myself as I continued to read.

“You may not see it at the moment I am writing this, but you truly are a special daughter. You have proven me wrong in that ring dozens of times. You’ve even become the world champion that I never thought you could be. I remember when you were little, you were always behind me. I neglected you on an emotional level, but you didn’t give up on me… until I began training you and I continued to push you away. My words toward you were uncalled for. I should’ve never called you a ‘bisexual deviant’. I should’ve never called you a ‘freak’. I was wrong for putting you down and calling you those names. Nothing between us was your fault, I want you to know that. I feel sick to my stomach knowing that you want nothing to do with me and that I deserve that.

I’m not asking you to forgive me… but I hope you do…”

I had a brief ‘why should I?’ moment in my head while I glanced back at my mother.

“Forgive you?” I said aloud with a scoff of disbelief. “After all you put me through?”

“Keep reading…” my mother encouraged.

“Forgive me for yourself, not for me. I take full responsibility for sabotaging your career as I did at the start. You were a psychological wreck because of me. I’ve been nothing but an anchor to you and I hope I won’t be much longer because you deserve better. You’ve got the brightest future ahead of you. You have turned me into a believer. If I never get the chance to be the dad you always wanted again, I only have myself to blame for that.

Good luck, kiddo.

Keep doing what you’re doing”

I placed the letter on my lap and looked back at my mother who could only smile as she knew I was done.

“See how special you are now?” she asked me.

I was still in a world of shock to answer for a few moments, but I finally gathered the strength to do so.

“I never thought this day would come…” I admitted with a sigh. “There was a part of me that always hoped he’d come around but I never imagined it would happen. Thank you for giving this to me when he died…”

My mother and I exchanged another embrace as the happiness continued to flow through me.

“You’re going to be a great champion…” she reassured me as she handed me my title back. We said our goodbyes as I stashed the letter in my purse and left the room. As I walked out of the hall, I began to experience an inner peace that I never imagined was possible…

Last Sunday

I was at my father’s grave, title belt and all. That letter hadn’t escaped my head just yet.

“Hold this for a moment…” I said as I put the title belt on his grave. The young lady in me that would always hate him and be bitter toward him no longer existed and I already knew that. It was a surreal feeling facing the biggest cause of my inner pain and insecurities one last time. But that championship belt on his grave gave me the courage to grow and finally do what I was about to do…

“Dad…” I said with a sigh. “I read your letter. Thank you. I’m happy that you owned up to your mistakes and all the pain you caused me. I am elated that you recognize that I was never at fault for how you treated me. But that championship that you’re holding now? I would’ve been sick to admit it a year ago, but for better or worse, I wouldn’t have done it without you. Regardless of what your intentions were, you did train me in the ring and I wouldn’t be here if you didn’t. In this weird way… all of your hate toward me… all of your doubting… all of your abuse… it pushed me to prove you wrong and to be my best for so many years…”

I looked at his grave for a bit, giving into the temptation of briefly thinking of what things would be like if he were still here. It was a temptation, however, that I got over rather quickly.

“I forgive you daddy…” I said with a deep breath. “All the abuse, all the pain, all of the emotional… psychological self-destructions I went through because of you… I forgive you for all of it…”

A huge weight was already melting off of my shoulders.

“It’s time for me to let go and to move on with my life now. I’m finally beginning the healing process to repair all the damage that you caused me and I will always appreciate that letter that you wrote to me because that, to me, represents the one and only time you were the father I always wanted you to be when I was a little girl. My inner child can heal too and gosh, she really deserves that peace. It’s crazy how we’re more alike than I would ever want to admit. After all, when it comes to professional wrestling, we are the types of people that settle for nothing less than being the best… of never being satisfied with where we are because we always feel we can be better. You’d be proud of me right now, I know that… for what I just accomplished with my new world title… for what I am about to do with my reign… but really daddy…”

I actually smiled for a moment when I picked up the championship from his grave and slung it over my shoulder.

“What I’m proud and happy of right now is the fact that things didn’t end so badly between us after all. That letter just further reinforces the confidence that I have grown within myself since I won this championship… that I will continue to grow the longer I hold this. Through all the awful things, daddy… thank you for the positives you gave me to grow in my career… and goodbye…”

I turned and began to walk away from the grave. There were no tears, only relief. I was happy that at long last, I got to move on with my life and no longer felt the burden in my soul that my psychologically abusive father had put there for years.

I was at the most confident I had ever been in myself…

And come Sunday? It was about to be in full display…

Friday…

The camera was on me as I held the championship over my shoulder. A part of me wanted to be angry considering the circumstances, but I was calm and confident. Thinking about Courtney, her words, and her attitude didn’t even anger me too much at this point. I was even smiling with amusement. As I sat in the ring of my father’s burned down wrestling school that was still in tact, I thought about her words going into High Stakes… and how fucking amazing it felt to shut her the hell up…

“Courtney… who does this title belong to, huh? How much crow have you been eating the last two weeks? To describe your attitude about me as a whole for weeks going into High Stakes, basically…

You NEVER believed in me as a challenger… not that I needed you to because me believing in me is all that matters.

You wasted all this energy for WEEKS trying to bury me… trying to tell the world that I’m a nobody, that ‘nobody cares about me’, that I didn’t deserve the title shot… while you had Keira calling me a ‘weakling’...

You never even BOTHERED to get to know me as a professional wrestler and what I am all about when it comes to what goes on in that ring because you were too busy trying to put me in the same bucket as Bombshells that are no longer here while I knew all along that I was on a different level then they are…

You never BOTHERED to know me PERSONALLY and what I had been through before I got to SCW…

Instead, you tried to convince the world… and most damning… yourself, about how great you are and how you accomplished this and that all while playing the victim when things didn’t go your way to the point where all you did was bitch and moan about how nobody gave you respect. You decided you were too good to wrestle me. Your lack of knowledge about me showed in that ring when you didn’t see me trapping you in my armbar the way I did, when you were trying to slander me so bad making up all these opinions and assumptions about me out of thin air that NOBODY with a brain ever bought and when you even attributed the actions of a former Bombshell to me.

YOU are to blame for losing this championship to me. YOU did this to yourself. YOU put yourself in the hole and you’re about to bury yourself in it when I beat you again. If you were the kind of champion that you claim to be, you would admit that you were wrong about me the entire time. You would maybe even humble yourself and give me the respect you wouldn’t give me before and you would’ve learned your lesson to become a different, probably even a better wrestler. But INSTEAD… you’re bitching up a social media storm: “Mikah rule” this, “enjoy it for two weeks” that wanting this immediate rematch so damn badly and you might think that it makes you look tough, Courtney. You might think it makes you look like a champion with initiative. Well, there are two things wrong with your line of thinking…

One, if you really WERE a champion with initiative instead of being at home for two weeks before High Stakes and not even bothering to promote the match at hand, you wouldn’t feel the need to look like a champion with initiative…

And two? It doesn’t make you look tough… it makes you look DESPERATE… PATHETIC…. Really…

All because you could NEVER accept the fact that you were WRONG and I am willing to bet that even now, you STILL haven’t learned your lesson about me. I’m almost positive that when you open your mouth about me again, you’re going to double down on all the ‘nobody’ stuff that you tried to force down the throat for weeks and you’re going to find like 10 million different ways to cry ‘fluke’. Look Court… whether you win this match or not, High Stakes wasn’t a fluke. I PROVED that I am the real deal around here and it’s NOT my problem if you don’t want to admit that. You can go ahead and keep living in denial like I am sure you are because what I proved at High Stakes, other than everything you ever said about me being wrong, is that you always WERE the insecure person I thought you were. What happened at High Stakes was that your insatiable ego blew up in your face and you couldn’t handle it, so you were demanding this rematch on the spot….

And the crazy thing is… you never could’ve imagined it coming. NEVER! Your final words going in surely proved that. I mean girl… let’s take a trip down memory lane and show you how little your words meant in the end and how little they mean now.

‘Julianna was upset because she was desperate for attention…’ says the woman crying ‘two weeks. Rematch’ literally minutes after High Stakes aired. Listen, I’m more AMUSED than mad… because your words… your actions… honestly? They remind me of a younger me. Five years ago, I was like you: desperate for attention, desperate to do whatever it took for everyone else to be wrong, saying and doing whatever I could to get ahead because I hated the person that I saw in the mirror, trying to bury and put down everyone in front of me to compensate for my lack of inner adequacy…

Calling someone else a nobody? That was in my playbook.

Cracking so damn bad after being proven wrong? Effectively when you were crying instant rematch, the cracks really began to show. You’ve just got far too much pride to admit that you’re EMBARRASSED by the fact that you tapped out at High Stakes.

Now, I’m not saying that beating you was easy because it wasn’t… but in all honesty? I was facing a mirror version of my younger self and considering I know ALL of my younger self’s weaknesses, which you showed in SPADES with the delusion you were living in and with the lack of respect on my name that you had on me from the start, I knew exactly what it took to beat you. It’s crazy that when I came in here, I once saw you as the solution to the Bombshells division problem that was the same old people being on top. But after REALLY getting to know you? I realize that you were never the solution, but the microcosm of the problem. Listen to yourself and how you speak about me… how you basically made the argument that I didn’t deserve to be here because I didn’t come up through Go Gym or SCU.

And?

You want to know who else didn’t come up through those entities?

Amber Ryan and Masque De Lune… outsiders that shot up the ladder rather quickly in this company. Maybe not as fast as me, but still. That’s my point. How am I any less deserving than either of those two? You mind explaining that to me? Hell, look at yourself. Your rise to the title started with the Blast from the Past tournament and you had an impressive run to the final four on that. But what if you were a first round elimination, Courtney? I HIGHLY doubt you would’ve ever gotten that shot against Roxi to begin with so don’t sit there and BITCH about the fast track to the title because YOU had it too when you came back. Hell, let’s look back at when you DID get that title shot… using YOUR own words toward me…

Your title shot against Roxi was just as random as mine against you. When they picked YOU, they picked someone that… oh I don’t know… “doesn’t stand for anything?”...

They picked an… “attention seeker without substance”... which HA… that’s ALL YOU have ever been when it comes to me because if you listen to the shit you’re saying about me… stretching out bullshit like “nobody”, and “she doesn’t deserve it” without ANY substance to what you’re saying about me… hey pot, meet kettle.

And someone that “leaves the moment things don’t go their way”... and I have a hunch YOU just might do that when I beat you again.

But see, it’s words like that… that are the microcosm of the BIGGEST problem you had while you were the champion…

Instead of giving ME a chance, you choose to just put ME in the same bracket as other people that, in the grand scheme of things, aren't even relevant. You decided who I already was, what my destiny in this company was going to be and how my career here was going to go literally because... well... because what else do you have to talk about? You’re literally the definition of an INFERIORITY COMPLEX because YOU’RE the one that can’t be FUCKING BOTHERED to know your opponent because you’ve got your ego that far up your ass and so you resort to POORLY trying to bring down someone SUPERIOR to them. In the grand scheme of things, Courtney, you're just someone that likes to make shit up out of thin air and calling other people exactly what you are... to quote your own words: drama and disappointment.

“Drama” speaking for itself with all the whining you’ve been doing about being disrespected and “disappointment”... well…

I mean, before you won the championship, “disappointment” is all you ever were, right?

For how long? Five years? Yeah, I suppose I’d be an insecure, desperate, immature excuse of a woman and an SCW Bombshells World Champion too if I took your path. Just because you were the champion doesn’t mean you can automatically erase all the disappointment that you were prior to then for five fucking years and that it’s going to be swept under the rug like nothing.

…especially when in the grand scheme, you WERE a disappointment as a champion… or at the very least, High Stakes made you one in the end, right?

No really, when the best thing you have on me is ‘nobody cares about you’, that is MASSIVELY disappointing as someone who is supposed to be “THE ONE” and basing every argument… WEAK argument mind you… that you had to explain why you are ‘supposedly better’ than me… on a bunch of hubris and opinions. All you’ve ever had to say about me are empty opinions I proved wrong at High Stakes and the sad thing is, you’re not going to change your opinions or your tune about me because I KNOW YOU by now and when I was you, I stubbornly stuck to my stupid views no matter how many times I was proven wrong.

You’re not going to grow from High Stakes.

I’m going to beat you again just from that fact alone. You’re going to come in here crying about how my win was a ‘fluke’, being the victim, saying how ‘unfair’ it is that I got my title shot in the first place and you’re going to go on and on and on about how you’re going to ‘erase what happened’.

Sorry Courtney… beating me on Sunday isn’t going to erase what happened. On the grandest stage of them all, you not only lost, you TAPPED! You can’t erase that! You can’t erase the fact that I took all of your empty words and shoved them down your throat, giving you the fate in that ring that you so richly deserved. No matter how desperately and how badly you want to spin it, Courtney, High Stakes was not a fluke, or a miracle and it never WAS going to be a fluke or a miracle. You’ve become so fucking predictable that the one real miracle here is that you didn’t lose the championship sooner than you actually did!

I WANT to say that after I beat you again, you’re FINALLY going to grow the fuck up, finally live in reality and eat the damn crow you should’ve eaten to begin with… but we both know that you’re never going to do that when I win again on Sunday. You’re going to just repeat the same cycle that you always do: cry, complain, make excuses, call it a fluke, double down on what I’ve already proven wrong…

And in an environment where someone as injury prone as you can very easily get injured again, there’s a HELL of a lot more that you deserve coming to you in the worst way that I wasn’t allowed to deliver at High Stakes.

After I beat you again, think about everything you’ve ever said about me from “nobody” to “mediocre” to “attention seeker without substance” and anything in between… look in the damn mirror and ask yourself: am I talking about Julianna when I say these things? Or am I talking about me?

The answer will surprise you, Courtney. I almost want to pity you for how hollow, empty and self-loathing of a person you really are.

ALMOST…

But I won’t…

Not tonight…

Not on Sunday when I beat you again…

Because at the end of the day, this Sunday, whatever humiliation that you felt that pushed you to cry for an instant rematch… you’re about to feel it all over again! Convince yourself otherwise… but remember that if you were every bit as good as you desperately try to convince yourself you are every night, you wouldn’t feel the need to do so!

With that, I shut off my camera feeling just as confident as I was going into High Stakes if not moreso.

I held onto my title, feeling as ready as I’ve ever been to participate on the big stage in SCW as I did at High Stakes, before I disappeared from the ruins of my father’s old wrestling school and into the night.

7
Climax Control Archives / It's How You Handle the Adversity...
« on: September 22, 2023, 11:56:02 PM »
Last Sunday

Julianna DiMaria is over the moon at the moment. Moments ago, in her own hometown nonetheless, she found out after Climax Control ended that she was going to be receiving a shot at the SCW Bombshells World Championship at High Stakes. Considering the proximity to San Diego, her mother joined her in Fresno. What was supposed to be just a regular, Sunday night dinner turned out to be something far more celebratory than planned. Currently, both are near done with dinner as Julianna’s mother breaks the ice.

“So, you’re going to talk about it now?” she asks.

“Talk about what?”

Her mother rolls her eyes in an amused manner.

“Oh right, the title shot. Well…” Julianna takes a pause for a brief moment to absorb the absolute shock of it all. “...THIS soon? At fucking High Stakes?”

“Sweetheart, let me be really honest with you…” her mother pauses as she grabs her hands. “...you act the way you do with your confidence and bravado with the camera on, but you really do underestimate yourself sometimes. We both know that you were going to get to a world championship level in your knew job someday.”

“But this soon?” Julianna says with a scoff. “I thought this was going to be a rebuilding thing. I thought this was going to take time. I figured I was going to have a long way to go considering that, when I signed, I was still trying to recover from last year and what I had been going through with NVR and…”

“None of that matters so much, Julianna…” her mother says with confidence. “You’ve always been strong enough to overcome any adversity thrown at you. You always have been ever since you got out of your personal rock bottom a few years back. I know what happened with NVR, being treated like a nostalgia act in Mainstream this year, and hat horribly sexist British company you were working for last year did a number on your confidence, but you’ve pulled through it. I understand being surprised by how fast it happened, but don’t be taking it for granted.”

“When you put it that way, yeah, maybe I do underestimate my own strength at times. BUT… I’ll tell you one thing, at least I can say that I earned it unlike the last bitch that had a title shot on one of their supershows.”

Julianna’s mother sighs and shakes her head with embarrassment.

“I can’t with her. You realize I had to change the channel when she was on, right?”

“...why? I’ve seen worse than her.”

“She reminds me so much of how you were earlier in your career when you had your father’s poison in your head… to a tee. I really don’t want to talk crap about the young lady, but that’s someone who doesn’t know how to be grateful for what she has and who doesn’t know a lick about handling adversity. But you do, Julianna. That’s why you’ve become the wrestler that you are now.”

Julianna is surprised to hear this from her own mother, considering the fact that she rarely gives such glowing compliments.

“I am not surprised that you’re getting a world title shot. I don’t care what anyone else says, but it’s not too soon for you and you have earned it. You’ve always been a fighter that has learned not just to stop giving a damn about what other people say about you, but to roll with the punches. I hated seeing you lack the ability to do this earlier in your career, but what I see is a young lady with her best years still ahead of her and who is about to become a world champion. So, when you go into that title match, don’t lose sight of that perspective. Remember where you came from, where you started, what you’ve overcome… and for god’s sake don’t regress and be that Ariana Angelos woman. You relapsing to that would hurt so much worse than you losing a world title match. I really…”

Mrs. DiMaria suddenly has a sudden pause.

“...I’m sorry Julianna, but I really have to use the bathroom again…”

“...that’s the third time in the last half hours. Mom, is something wrong?”

Her mother doesn’t give her any assurances when she bites her lower lip.

“Just think about what I just told you, okay? I’ll be right back.”

Julilanna’s mother heads to the bathroom while Julianna herself just takes a sip of some iced tea she ordered earlier.

“Maybe she just drank too much water…” Julianna says with a shrug, not thinking anything of the frequent restroom trips. This allows her to focus on her entire wrestling journey and not just the brief one that she’s had in SCW so far.

“It’s easy to remember when I used to be so bad at handling adversity like I was before…”

While she waits for her mother to return, Julianna takes a trip down memory lane.

Fall 2019

Julianna at the moment, just a week or so removed from her 25th birthday, is feeling nothing but shame as she glares at a sign that says “San Diego Psychiatric Clinic”. She happens to be in a therapy room with a psychiatrist that she has known for a while.

“How did this happen?” he asks her. “What in the world caused you to snap so much that your mother had to drag you here for an overnight stay? Were you on any kind of drugs, Julianna?”

“No…”

“Were you drunk?”

“I don’t drink, Dr. Montgomery…”

“So what happened? Talk to me. How does Julianna DiMaria go from a promising young prospect in the world of professional wrestling to being, honestly, a joke in Portland Pro Wrestling. I know you just lost a huge match that you HAD to win. Was it that?”

“It wasn’t losing the match…” Julianna says with sadness in her eyes. “I went home after the match and I went to see my mother. Right when I was about to knock on the door, she and my father were arguing about me. I heard my father tell my mother that I was a failure and that I should retire and become a porn star because I can ‘never break the ceiling’.”

“And that’s what made you break down the window and then attack him?”

“After he told my mother that I should’ve never been born and that knowing I existed made him feel like less of a man…”

Dr. Montgomery shakes his head.

“All this, just from a career that hasn’t been what you wanted.”

“Yeah…” Julianna admits.

“Let me tell you something, Julianna. Your father may be your trigger and I understand that. But ultimately, this all falls on you. Only you are responsible for your own actions. It’s an endless cycle with you: you put all this pressure on yourself to win a big match, you don’t. Then, you handle it horribly and take it out on everyone else. THEN, when your father chimes in and either makes fun of you or degrades you for losing that big match, you snap, you go into a dark place and… you REALLY did it this time. Attacking your father was one thing, but going as far as grabbing a glass shard from the window and threatening to cut yourself?”

Julianna can’t help but let the tears flow at this point.

“You’ve got to break the cycle. You’ve got to get a grip on the fact that it’s not the adversity itself that you face, it’s how you handle it. You’re going to run yourself out of this business within the next year the way you’re going… or WORSE. I am making a medical recommendation that you leave Portland Pro…”

“And let THEM win?” Julianna says stubbornly “...all they ever try to do is screw me…”

“Julianna, quit it with the victim complex. Being there is clearly not right for your mental health. There is far more things in life than winning some big match. Losing one certainly isn’t worth even THINKING about self-harming. You can’t let your father continue to have this hold over you. Losing a match does not prove him right and winning a match doesn’t prove him wrong. You have nothing to prove to him. You have to prove to yourself that you’re capable of reaching your full potential and the only way you’re going to do that is to learn to roll with the punches so much better, you understand that?”

“You make much sense, Dr. Montgomery. I feel so… horrible. I can’t believe I let things spiral that far out of control.”

“You don’t have to allow it to spiral out of control any further. You are the only one that truly defines what your purpose and your legacy is going to be… not your mother, not your father, not Portland Pro or any other wrestling company, not a match, not a wrestler… you! To put it bluntly in a way someone like you will understand: you can make adversity your bitch, or you can be adversity’s bitch. The choice is really up to you at the end of the day.”

Dr. Montgomery gets interrupted by the sudden presence of Mrs. DiMaria who has arrived to take Julianna back home.

“Now, I hope you think about what I’ve been telling you….”

“I will, Dr. Montgomery… I promise…”

Julianna is able to dry her own eyes before she leaves with her mother…

A little bit later…

There’s been some odd silence on the ride back home, but Julianna finally says something when her mother pulls up into the driveway.

“I’m so sorry mom…”

Her mother sighs.

“At this point, an apology can only do so much. What are you going to do differently, Julianna? It’s never gotten to this extreme, but your insecurities with your career are always coming back to bite you.”

“I’m going to leave Portland for starters…”

“Good. And?”

“I’m going to figure out how to be better. I’m a train wreck, mother. I admit this. I need to change. I need to be better than blaming everyone else for my problems. I need to start taking responsibility and I need to start being an adult and that’s exactly what I am going to do. I promise you…”

“I’m not the one you need to make any promises to.”

“Then… I’m going to make a promise to myself that I am going to break the cycle and I’m going to learn how to roll with the punches so I can be a better wrestler, but more importantly, be in a better place as a person.”

“You’re capable of anything you set your mind to, Julianna…” her mother reminds her. “Don’t let go of that…”

Julianna stays alone in the car for a small bit after her mother exits as she starts to think of how she’s turning her career around… which she obviously would in the months to come…

Last Sunday…

“I really have come such a long way from that rock bottom, haven’t I?” Julianna asks herself in her head.

“Sorry about that…” Mrs. DiMaria says as she comes back to the dinner table and sits across from her.

“Mom, are you SURE you’re okay? Don’t tell me something silly like “I had too much water this morning” because even then, three times in a half hour isn’t normal”

Julianna’s mother has a sullen look on her face.

“There’s something that I have to tell you…”

“Now? Mom, this is supposed to be celebrating the big news about High Stakes.”

“You’re on to something not being right. I’ve been having some back pain lately…”

“It’s not related to… wait…”

“I got my kidneys checked out and… the cancer that I had there that was in remission? It’s back…”

“...no….” Julianna says with a shocked gasp. “NO! Mom…”

“I’ve beaten it once, remember? So much good came out of it. With you, it really woke you up and made you learn not to take things for granted anymore. No worries, they caught it early just like they did last time.”

“That’s good!” Julianna says with a little more exuberance. “Thank god! You’re going to kick cancer’s ass… again!”

Mrs. DiMaria can only help but laugh given the grim situation she just unloaded on her.

“One more detail though. There won’t be any chemo this time. Julianna, bear with me on this… they’ve decided that removing the kidney completely is the better decision.”

Julianna’s jaw drops in shock, with her head spinning 100 miles an hour.

“We don’t want to risk cancer coming back for round three, do we?”

“Yeah… I get it… so… when is this happening?”

“A few weeks from now… a week and a half prior to your big title match in fact. I’m sorry to say that I more than likely won’t make that.”

“Don’t be sorry, mother. Take care of yourself first. You know I’d love for you to be there, but if you can’t, you can’t. I can’t help but be devastated for you. I mean, the frequent restroom trips make more sense but… I’m sorry, I feel like I’ve just been punched in the gut…”

“I understand, sweetheart…” she says as she grabs her hand. “But stay strong for me, alright? I know the first time around it weighed heavily on you but I need you to be just as strong with this if not stronger than before. Remember what you learned about rolling with the punches. This is just another one of those things. Don’t let my situation be a distraction for your wrestling goals, alright?”

“Mom, you know I am not going to be able to help it. I’ll be thinking about you plenty. But, I know exactly where the strength in my DNA comes from and she’s the parent that I still have in this world. I know this news is… a shock… but… we still have some happy news to celebrate, right?”

Her mother processes the conversation for a moment before she’s able to crack a smile.

“Of course, Julianna. You having a title shot on that kind of stage is definitely something to be happy and excited about. I don’t want you to be upset or sad about my situation. I want you to stay happy and stay focused with yours, okay? Can you promise me that you’re going to stay strong for me?”

“Of course I can! I’ve done it before when you were in this same situation and I’m going to do it again and if you can’t make it to High Stakes, then I know you’ll be there with me in spirit. If anything, I’ll do what I did last time: be inspired, not downtrodden, and to use that same inspiration to be a better wrestler and a better person!”

“That’s exactly what I wanted to hear sweetheart…”

Julianna exchanges a hug with her mother and the pair continue on with their evening.. Julianna certainly has much emotions to filter through knowing that she’s got a huge match coming up AND she’s got to balance that with the medical scare that she just learned about.

Still…

This is not an adversity that is going to weigh her down…

September 22

Julianna doesn’t know whether to be amused or serious as she finds herself in an abandoned psychiatric clinic in the outskirts of Fresno. No doubt she is reflecting on her rock bottom of her career at this point especially knowing the match that she has coming up. When she turns the camera on, she’s already thinking about Ariana Angelos, though it’s unclear whether she’s angry about how she’s carrying herself or not. Either way, she’s about to speak her mind.

“A wise man once told me that you can make adversity your bitch, or that you can BE adversity’s bitch. Ariana Angelos, I think with YOU, the choice is clear. You are, without a shadow of a doubt, the biggest disgrace to this division and this company as a whole besides the likes of Bea Barnhart and I am NOT speaking hyperbole, I am speaking facts. Let’s give the short version of this whole thing: you had a lucky draw from a random deck of cards for a world title shot against Courtney Pierce, Ruby Steele interfered, you lost. Been there, done that. You can cry ‘screwed’ all you want to, but what have you actually DONE about it besides whine and complain on social media and all over Climax Control? NOTHING!

In fact… ever since the turn of the year when you lost your Roulette Championship, NOTHING is basically what your career has amounted to, hasn’t it? Who in the FUCK are YOU to demand another title shot? For starters, you didn’t even deserve the one against Courtney at ALL! SURE, you can make the argument that it’s too soon for ME to get any sort of title shot, but at least I have wins to back it up… particularly one against Courtney’s predecessor. Hell, let me take it a step further. You didn’t even deserve the title shot you got against Roxi either. What if I told you that the last ONE ON ONE WIN that you had was that number one contender’s match against Zoey Lukas. First off, winning against the store brand Lukas to even BE the number one contender in the first place? Unimpressive… and you didn’t even PIN the woman! You won that match with a COUNTOUT! But SOMEHOW you think you deserve to even BE in the World Championship picture? Bitch, you don’t even deserve to be in the Internet championship picture… of SIN CITY UNDERGROUND… with the way you have wrestled all year. The last time you actually PINNED anyone in a one on one match was Jessie Salco when you defended the Roulette Championship… LAST YEAR! But you want to act like you deserve a world title shot? Hell, you don’t even deserve THIS opportunity. Kayla Richards, who has made you her BITCH for the better part of a year or so, deserves this more than you do and SOMEHOW, your entire situation is everyone else’s fault, right?

Maybe if you… I don’t know… WON matches without relying on countouts or HB Carter in mixed tags you would… I don’t know… MAYBE deserve it? SINCE you lost to Roxi… your singles matches ever since: Aleesha Jones… loss. Keira Fisher… loss. Kayla Richards… los…. again… One is a current champion, one is a former champion, one is a Hall of Famer. FINE, I suppose. But GEORGIE ROBERTSON?!?!?! You couldn’t even beat GEORGIE FUCKING ROBINSON? How the FUCK do YOU deserve to even be in the main event, or even come CLOSE to sniffing that when you couldn’t even beat Georgie fucking Robinson! That do nothing bitch is literally one of the FEW bombshells that a Bea Barnhart is capable of beating, and you can’t even beat HER?

But you deserve a title shot more than anyone else?

No…

Let me give you some reality here you ungrateful little bitch… with how you’ve been losing matches lately, it’s a wonder you even got a contendership match when you beat Zoey. Hell, I’m starting to think it may be a wonder that you are even employed at all. I mean, when your last one on one, non-countout, non-DQ singles win was LAST YEAR, girl… you’d be lucky to be employed as my own personal shoe shiner! But NO… you act like your shit doesn’t stink. You want to overexpose yourself on Climax Control last Sunday acting like you’re the star of the show when not only were you never even a BIG DEAL in SCU when that company existed… you weren’t even the biggest deal at Go Gym and by the way, great fucking job disgracing them with how you’ve been acting lately. You want to talk about being ‘screwed’ and how Violent Conduct should’ve been your moment?

Reality check… whether Ruby Steele interferes or not, you’re still losing that match. It’s not even just because of Courtney being on top of her game right now, it’s the fact that… okay, time for some LOGIC which you’ve been lacking lately. You can’t even beat Georgie Robertson, so on WHAT planet were you going to beat Courtney? Even if you may have been about to hit your finisher, who’s to say that she doesn’t kick out of it anyway? Yeah, I get your perspective though. I’ve BEEN there. I hate to admit it, but I’ve even been YOU… in terms of being screwed and cast aside like a piece of fucking garbage. I GET IT! But at least the way I handle it? I push on. I either screw the person right back or laugh in their face. I am not that bitch that I was earlier in my career where I would have massive mental meltdowns on social media over every single little thing that doesn’t go my way… which.. BANG UP JOB on that by the way. Had I lost at Violent Conduct, I wouldn’t have been THAT bothered it. I would’ve moved on. I had nothing to REALLY lose in that match to begin with. I’m the type of wrestler that has learned to take it in the chin.

You on the other hand… you basically morphed into the Mediterranean version of Krystal Wolfe from earlier this year and the fact that even SHE admits that is an indictment on you because YOU should’ve known better, Ariana! YOU should’ve AVOIDED that example, but you basically ripped her off and did the same thing that she did, probably in a similar way too. You’re so UNORIGINAL that it’s no wonder that most of this locker room doesn’t give a fuck about you. Holy hell, it’s like that disgusting blob demon thing from Buffy the Vampire Slayer that left one body and infected the other with you and Krystal…

Hey, is SIN in there somewhere?

You were already that back of the line bitch, Ariana… but after your behavior last Sunday and on Twitter after the fact, you’ve gone from back of the line bitch to an overall embarrassment not just to this division or this company, but effectively to all of professional wrestling. Oh, you want to talk about how you’re not going to be shuffled to the back of the line after being screwed at Violent Conduct?

Girl, the back of the line is where you were when you got your lucky draw in the first place.

And while you’re at it, learn to accept some responsibility for your own bullshit! That losing streak in one on one matches? That’s not on Mark, that’s not on Christian, that’s not on Courtney, that’s on YOU and you seem to REFUSE to see that because you suddenly think that everyone else is out to get you when in reality, you did this to yourself by being nothing but a constant, perennial loser for the entire year. Hell, you think Courtney would even want to be out to get you? You think you’re GOOD ENOUGH for her to even want to screw you out of the match we’re having this Sunday? If you really think that, then you REALLY need to come back to earth because there’s no WAY Courtney should even BOTHER having an agenda against you. You’re not even close to being a threat to her for her to have an agenda against you.

I’m not necessarily saying that you are wrong for speaking up. But the thing of it is, you don’t even have a leg to stand on when it comes to the Bombshells title in the first place. You never even DID. If you had won most of your matches, put in the damn hard fucking work that it takes to get to the top and actually earned your title shots without fluky countouts or equally fluky card draws, then that’s one thing. But you’ve done NONE of that. You want to act all tough and all bad and you want to think that dissing Jessie’s parents is going to make you edgy and intimidating. Girl, this act that you’re putting on doesn’t make you SHIT… except for an absolute wannabe who can’t accept what her limitations are in this company. This whole shtick of yours? I can’t buy it. I won’t buy it. It’s like you are trying so hard to make us forget that prior to your title shot against Courtney, you were down on your confidence and completely down on your luck because you hadn’t won a match in a while. Don’t think anyone forgets how on social media, when it was announced you were getting that shot, you initially acted as if you didn’t deserve it.

You had ZERO confidence going into that match initially which is why I feel like you lose to Courtney one way or another. But you know, that’s not the only reason. You went from being unconfident going into that match to suddenly wanting to win that match for Team Hero… and then that changed before the match even happened for whatever reason that it did. Honestly, you’re a complete fucking mess in the head, Ariana. But SOMEHOW, SOMEWAY, through ALL of this, you think you’re ENTITLED to a rematch when you don’t have ANY real argument for deserving it?

‘But Ruby…’

NO, that’s not an argument… especially when you never even deserved that title shot in the first place… which by the way, makes your little spiels about how Courtney is a ‘paper champion’ seem all the more ridiculous not only because she HAS retained her title without cheating against other opponents, not only because she WON the title from Roxi without any controversy, but because you literally were the definition of a paper challenger anyway.

But NOW you want to be that big bad bitch that everyone hates and you want to act like you’re so special and you’re so unique well bitch, you’re NOT special, you’re NOT unique, you DON’T deserve a world title shot, you NEVER deserved it in the first place and last Sunday, when you burned your bridge with your friends and when you did the same with the fans, you basically lost their support, which coming into this match, is the one thing that you would’ve had over me to begin with. The fact that you even HAVE this opportunity is a disgrace to the damn title. Seriously! I can’t STAND people like you that think that they’re entitled to everything. Yeah, I may be who I am. I may be a bitch to some people. I may say the things that I do in the way that I do and I may hurt feelings… but at least I OWN who I am! At least I KNOW who I am.

You? You’re just desperate for attention… hell desperate to be in any way relevant, because you can’t buy a one on one non-bullshit win to save your life these days. You snapped because that match against Courtney was your one last chance of having any semblance of meaning in this division for the time being and you’re just desperate to stay in the picture even though you didn’t deserve to be in it at all.

I’ve SEEN this act before… hell, I’ve even BEEN this act before. I USED to act like I’m entitled to everything just like you did and all that did was take me straight to rock bottom. But, I overcame rock bottom. I overcame my insecurities. Throughout your entire career, you clearly haven’t and you can say whatever the hell you want about me, but I get shit done. At least I can overcome any loss, any opponent, any other type of adversity that comes at me.

You on the other hand, are just fine with being a bitter, pathetic, wormy little WANNABE that doesn’t know how to make the best out of the worst situations like I have and that’s why you have done nothing but completely crumble as you have after you lost the Roulette Championship. I wouldn’t even be surprised if you never got over it. This whole ‘bitch act’ of yours is literally your last, desperate attempt to even be anything in this division and I’m going to tell you straight up that you’re only going to drive your career FURTHER into the ground if that is even POSSIBLE at this point. I don’t need Courtney to be on my side and to be honest with you, I’d rather she didn’t. I’d rather she doesn’t fast count me just to screw you and keep you out of the title match because for one, I REALLY don’t want to hear you make any more excuses for your historic ineptitude inside of a Sin CIty Wrestling ring these days and hell, the whole of 2023, but I also DON’T need a fast count, or some other form of bullshit, to beat you straight up. I come into this thing KNOWING that I deserve this title shot more than you do even though you are just my fifth match in the company and KNOWING that you could NEVER be better than me!

Reality’s about to set in for you, Ariana. After I defeat you on Sunday and leave you locked out of the High Stakes main event as you should’ve been in the first place, you’re going to HOPEFULLY come to your senses and realize that hey…

Maybe you’re just not cut out to be a world champion…

Maybe you’re better off being HERE… in this abandoned psych hospital I happen to be talking to you from.

Because lord nows the only thing you need wrapped around you is a straitjacket, not a championship.

Julianna scoffs before she shuts off the camera and remains completely confident about her chances come Sunday night at Climax Control.

8
Climax Control Archives / You Are Who You Are
« on: September 08, 2023, 11:55:48 PM »
September 3rd

Oner week following her win against Roxi Johnson, Julianna is not only back in San Diego, but she is also at the wrestling school she trained at under her parents… or what is left of it anyway as it was previously burned by a fire. Her eyes don’t indicate any sadness about this especially as she walks into the ruins and sits down on a metal bench that survived the fire. As she soaks in her surroundings, she is immediately remembering her training, the way she was brought up in this business and some of the advice that her father would tell her:

“You can never show signs of weakness…” she recalls hearing, though she purses her lips in disgust of that thought.

“Everyone in this business is always out to get you…” her father would repeatedly tell her all those years ago. She narrows her eyes with bitterness once she reflects on this, knowing all too well that she hasn’t fully broken away from this teaching.

“You can never be satisfied with any victory no matter who it is…” her father once taught her. “You’re only as good as your last match. You can’t bask in the glow. You embrace it in the moment and you wake up the next day and it’s onto the next…”

Julianna processes this thought, especially as it pertains to the win that she just got. If there was any joy at all from her win against Roxi, she’s definitely moved past it. Granted, when she looks into her purse and pulls out the set of brass knuckles she used, she does have a bit of a smirk on her face.

“That’ll shut her up…” Julianna says with a scoff as she still manages to find satisfaction in how she won that match. Still, this is only fleeting. Her eyes go back to narrowing with bitterness when she remembers much of what she was taught, much of it bad.

“I should’ve trained with someone else…” Julianna openly reflects. “I still remember all of the nonsense I learned here. Apparently, showing emotions and signs of weakness makes you mediocre according to my father yet, all I’ve done since I started to become the star that I’ve been is wear my heart on my sleeve. GOOD ONE DAD, always full of shit! How do you see me now? Knowing that I’ve been thriving regardless of how you basically tried to sabotage me?”

Julianna pauses and lets out a deep breath.

“This business is cruel. I’ve experienced it in my own right. I used to think that everyone was out to get me because of what I learned here. That did nothing but bring me down. I don’t believe in that anymore. But as far as never being satisfied with a win?”

Julianna shakes her head. She doesn’t necessarily believe in this, but knows that’s the one thing that she still has stuck in her brain as far as her father is concerned.

“I got that big one last week… and I admit… I barely feel a thing. I know what this means on paper but… the honest truth is… I wasn’t satisfied for long. Maybe I’d be a little happier about that win if I trained anywhere else but here…”

“Or maybe if you embraced who you are completely…” she hears the voice of someone familiar. Julianna’s eyes widen with shock seeing two old friends that abandoned her after she lost the NVR World Championship.

“Christy… Ally…” Julianna says with a snarl on her face and a raging fire in her eyes. Her former friends are quick to pick up on her anger.

“Hey Jules…” Christy says, knowing Julianna is angry.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” Ally adds.

“You two… have ALL the NERVE to show back up into my life uninvited after the way you treated me more than a year and a half ago.” Julianna responds with vicious anger as she stands up to meet them in the eye. “You two were my ride or dies. You stood by me through EVERYTHING! You were with me when I was a world champion twice over and then early last year when I lost the last one I’ve held to date… it’s like I didn’t exist to you. You abandoned me at a time I needed you the most…”

“ABANDONED YOU?” Christy says with a scoff. “Girl…”

“We didn’t ‘abandon you’. Until recently, you abandoned yourself…” Ally adds, causing Julianna’s anger to boil a little more.

“Excuse me? You two are still in the Indies waiting tables as a second job. You don’t talk to me like that. I lost the title that I had and you both decided you didn’t want to be my friend anymore. You two were two of the few people I’ve ever trusted at any point in my career and suddenly, because I’m not a world champion anymore, I’m not good enough for you? Bye bitches, I have nothing to say to a couple of backstabbing BASICS that can’t even sniff a tryout on the mainstream or a contract in another country.”

“Why does it need to be this way between us? We actually came here hoping to clear the air…”

“Yeah, we’re not here to fight you. We missed you. Seriously.”

“We’ve been impressed with what you’ve been doing in Sin City Wrestling…” Christy says, causing Jullanna to let her guard down slightly. “I know it’s just three matches but…”

“You DID just beat Roxi Johnson…” Ally says with a beaming tone in her voice. “Nice way to do it too…”

“You both want these knuckles too?” Julianna asks, still bitter. “It seems like you two are just bandwagon hopping. No thank you!”

“Can’t you at least hear us out?” Christy says with an exasperated sigh.

“We didn’t mean to hurt you, honestly. We’ve always loved you. We know what we did. You can argue that we could’ve gone about things differently, but there was no getting through to you because you were just stuck on this whole ‘you’re abandoning me’ shtick.”

“What Ally was trying to say is: as your friends, we did what we thought was best for you. You’re the one that wouldn’t allow us to explain and went on this big blocking spree of our numbers, our Snapchats and everything…”

“What I remember is feeling abandoned…” Julianna says, unable to hold back any sadness at this point. “This burned down wrestling school might as well be a metaphor for our friendship.”

“We all want to repair this…” Ally says with concern. “Please Jules, just listen to our side of the story. You remember being ‘abandoned’, we remember it differently. So, can we talk about what happened?”

“YEAH…” Julianna says with heightened anger. “Let’s fucking talk about it…”

“Alright…” Christy says as she and Ally sit down on the bench. Julianna joins them.

“So… it was a few days after you lost the title…” Ally remembers, before they really discuss what happened…

2022

“YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FRIENDS!!!!!!!” Julianna screams at Christy and Ally in her own kitchen when she just receives some awful news. “You can’t just come into my house and tell me that you want nothing to do with me!!!!”

“Julianna, that’s not what we said…” Ally tries to reason. “You’re distraught about losing your world title and we don’t blame you…”

“But we think it’s best to give you some space for a while. It’s more than recovering from a devastating loss. It’s about remembering who you are”

“I KNOW who the FUCK I am…” Julianna snaps back at her friends, already teary eyed at this point. “I’m Julianna DIMaria, damn it! Two time world champion! The whole damn franchise of Napa Valley Wrestling! I’m who the fans voted as Wrestler of the Year! Yeah, I let them down and that hurt the shit out of me, but THIS? I’ve already had fans abandoning me and now YOU TOO? I’m supposed to be a role model for so many… including you two…”

“THAT’S the problem…” Ally says sullenly.

“NO, the problem is that two women that I’ve stuck with almost from day one since we all started training at my father’s wrestling school decide to NOT want to be associated with me anymore all because I lost a world title!”

“That’s NOT the reason why…” Christy tries to explain. “Your title loss has you lashing out in the worst way. Please, take a few deep breaths, calm down and…”

Julianna grabs Christy and pins her against the wall, pressing her forearm into her throat.

“Don’t fucking tell me to calm down.”

“Get off of her…” Ally says in a state of panic as she tries to grab Julianna.

“You need to understand…” Christy says, barely able to speak. “You DON’T know who you are.”

Julianna rears back, ready to punch her, before Ally grabs her arm and then yanks her off of Christy who coughs up some air before she comes to her senses.

“We think it’s best that we give you some space until you realize who you are. Julianna, when you made your award acceptance speech for NVR Wrestler of the Year, you jumped the shark.”

Julianna is confused at Ally’s words.

“You were talking about being inspired by the fans, how you didn’t want to let them down, and all of that stuff and Christy and I… I remember we looked at each other and we realized the same thing: that you lost your edge and that you’ve abandoned who you are.”

“Yeah, Julianna DiMaria isn’t a panderer to the fans that wants to be a role model. We know you, Jules. You’ve always had that ‘take no prisoner’ attitude…”

“Or you DID before you decided to pander to people that never appreciated you. I mean, have you read the stuff online about you? The same people kissing your ass are moving on to the next flavor of the month…”

“So basically, go back to the Barbie that my father turned me into… is that it?”

“No no… that’s not…”

“Get out…” Julianna interrupts, catching her friends by surprise.

“Julianna…”

“GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE! BACKSTABBING BITCHES!” Julianna screams, without even THINKING about what her friends are trying to tell you.

“WE’RE NOT ABANDONING YOU!” Christy yells back.

“I don’t want to see EITHER of you again! You’re DEAD to me! DONE! Go be like everyone else in the world and crawl up the ass to the next flavor of the month! You both decided to abandon me… so ABANDON ME already! I don’t know what’s worse: THIS or saying that I was better being under my dad’s mind control…”

“But that’s not what…”

“GET OUT!”

Christy and Ally look at each other and realize that their cause is hopeless. They make their way out the door as fast as they can and when Julianna has a moment alone, she lies down on the couch, grabs one of the cushions, buries her face in it and lets it all out: the tears, the emotions, the heartbreak, and the loss of confidence she was experiencing at the time. Truly, with the loss of the world title she had, her world has only begun to collapse around her…

Present Day

“Girls, I’m so sorry…” Julianna says through the tears running down her face. “I didn’t give you a chance. You were both right. Being that panderer wasn’t me.”

“You got to the top because you didn’t give a damn about what others thought…” Ally reminds her.

“The moment you started to care about what the fans thought is the moment you lost everything…” Christy adds.

“You’re right…” Julianna says while nodding. “That was so dumb of me. What was I thinking?”

“You’ve found yourself again, Jules…” Ally says with a smile. “We’ve been seeing what you’re doing in Sin City Wrestling so far and the way you talk to your opponents, the way you’ve been treating them inside of the ring, the way you have resurrected that take no prisoners attitude again…

“It’s the Julianna we met many years ago here and the Julianna we’ve both known and loved for so long. Really! You haven’t given a fuck about what anyone thinks!”

“The way you rattled Roxi Johnson going into that match is stuff of sheer brilliance… masterclass even!”

Julianna finally smiles briefly as she wipes away the tears of regret she had.

“My mother wasn’t too happy with how I treated her. I got that whole ‘you didn’t need to treat her like that’ lecture from her but… that’s my mom. I’m happy that I managed to beat Roxi, don’t get me wrong on that. But, It really was a stop along the way like I figured it would be. It was the biggest win of my run so far, but at the same time, I just can’t feel TOO happy with it. That damn father of mine teaching me to never be satisfied with a win…”

“I don’t think it’s that…” Christy counters. “Let speak the truth here. You know that there is better than Roxi on the roster and while that win is the biggest of your career, you’re not necessarily satisfied with it because the division is growing beyond her…”

“Thank GOD…” Julianna says with a scoff. “IBy the way, I’m so glad that you actually like me for who I actually am and not for all the fake pandering nonsense that I did once upon a time. It’s so freeing, you know? I know that there is a huge future ahead of me there and I might find out something REALLY big here soon about High Stakes and I think THAT is what is motivating me right now. You both know me: I won’t stop at a damn thing to ensure that I get to where I am capable of being if not even better than I was before.”

“You got THAT right…” Ally says with a laugh. “By the way… um… we’re good right?”

Julianna lets out a sigh, though this one is of relief.

“I should be the one asking both of you that considering that we fell apart because of me…”

“If we weren’t cool, we wouldn’t be trying to sort this out with you. We just waited until we knew with confidence that you had found your true self again. Besides, Ally and I should’ve approached this better. We could’ve either waited until you moved past the title loss or worded things so much better than we did.”

“We’re all responsible…” Ally adds. “But we can put it all behind us. What do you say?”

Julianna stands up and walks away from both women for a bit. Initially she doesn’t know what to think. She is still feeling the sting of them leaving her side in the first place but she understands WHY they did it and knows in her heart the extent of her culpability for the whole thing. She won’t admit it to anyone else publicly, but she knows that if she didn’t abandon who she was in the first place, she would’ve never fallen out with her friends whatsoever. She turns back to them and takes a deep breath.

“Let’s put it behind us…” she says as she approaches them both at the bench and an embrace is exchanged with each of them.

“I’m SO glad this place burned down…” Christy says with a laugh.

“Me too… oh my god…” Ally adds.

“You two have done so much better without my father as well I bet…”

Julianna and her newly reunited friends take a tour of the charred remains of what was once her father’s wrestling school. For Julianna personally, this reunion, on top of her recent victory, truly showcase just how good things are becoming for her as of late.

September 8th

Julianna has the camera on as she is at a small party venue in Los Angeles, surrounded with balloons and streamers with an overhead banner saying “CONGRATULATIONS BEA!”

There is even a plan, vanilla cake with absolutely no icing or frosting on it. Julianna stands by the cake, ready to express her thoughts.

“CONGRATULATIONS BEA!” Julianna says with a laugh. “You’re about to make history! You’re about to become the rare breed of Bombshell that is truly about to join a prestigious club… if you’re not the founder of it…

The FIFTY LOSS CLUB!

Look, I understand that on any given Sunday, anything in SCW can happen. Hell, you even scraped up two wins over Alexandra Callaway earlier in the year. But, considering the victory I am coming off of? Considering that I am NOT about to let my guard down… not NOW… not against YOU… I’ve got everything going my way and everything in my power to ASSURE that I am NOT going to lose to you this Sunday. As a matter of fact, I have to say that I am insulted. I am no Roxi fan, I have made that VERY clear, but to go from someone like her to someone like you? Yeah, that IS an insult Bea. Because one only has to go through how PATHETIC your history is. After all, you’ve been in SCW since December of 2019… nearly four years. And in that span, you’ve won like what? Thirteen matches? How the FUCK are you STILL on the roster when you’ve only been averaging like three to four wins a year? It’s almost as if I am facing Dawn Warren again like I did in my debut, but at least Dawn was a puppy that knew how to bite.

You Bea? The kind of dog you are? You’re the kind of dog that has lived on for too long. You are literally the EPITOME of futility. Recently, you had a chance to gain a Roulette Championship shot against Jessie Salco… AGAIN… against Alexandra Calloway and Seleana Zdunich… someone you fluked your way to a win against twice… and one of the few Bombshells on the roster you are capable of beating… never mind the fact that Seleana has beaten you like five times. Basically, this was as easy as it could be for you… and you STILL blew it! But that’s your story, isn’t it, Bea? All bark? No bite? You’ve been here HOW long and you’ve won HOW many singles titles? How many times have you been gifted a title shot only to blow it? It DISGUSTS ME… that someone like you… who doesn’t evolve at ALL, who is still the same BITCH that she was when she first came here… STILL continues to be handed opportunities without earning them even though she’s been the biggest perennial loser this side of Jessie Salco when she went through that phase of her career and me? Look, I’ve only been in three matches here. I get that.

But what’s my opportunity going to be?

You can make a case that I deserve an Internet title shot. After all, in my debut I DID beat the then-previous challenger in Dawn Warren and in my second match here, I beat the woman that is… ONLY because of some STUPID Queen of the Day tradition… challenging for that title instead of me. In fact, when you consider that Laura was the most recent challenger to the Roulette Championship when I beat her, You can argue that I deserve that shot more than YOU did a few weeks back. But… at Violent Conduct, I wasn’t in a contender’s situation for either title was I? Whereas someone like YOU… I swear, anyone facing you in a contender’s match might as well have a BYE to a title match and effectively, that’s what Alexandra Calloway had.

But see, the saddest thing about you? It’s not even all the opportunities you’ve blown.

It’s that despite the fact that you have more than three times as many losses as wins, you STILL think you’re worth whatever the fuck this company is paying you… which I hope to god isn’t that much considering you’ve been a wasted investment on their part. No seriously… you shrug off losses like they don’t even matter and that’s why you stay stuck in the mud and don’t improve at all and someone like YOU, in that regard, makes me sick. You’ve talked shit so many times yet you almost never back it up. In fact, you’re so delusional about yourself that you can’t even see that you’re EXACTLY what you have accused other Bombshells of…

For instance…

When you said that Ariana Angelos proves that talk is cheap…

HA! Look in the mirror, idiot! I have lost count of the violent threats you’ve made toward others in your own promos and how nine times out of ten, you’re the one that eats the loss on the end.  Hell, maybe you want to get some psychiatric care for how delusional you are. I mean, you’ve gone on the record many times saying that you’ve proven yourself in the ring.

HOW, Bea? How is it that someone like you who is about to suffer their fiftieth loss… who has been SO piss poor that of the five supercards SCW has had this year, you’ve only been on TWO of them… has actually proven herself in the ring? By being a former Mixed Tag Team Champion that your husband effectively carried in the first place? Didn’t you lose those belts in your first defense anyway? What? Does beating Alexandra with Bobbie Dahl’s help prove that? Or hell, maybe all the title opportunities you’ve ever fucked up does that. I REALLY don’t know. I have never been YOU, Bea… and thank FUCK for that because if I were ever you… in your situation, with THAT record? I’d realize that I’m just not cut out for this and retire.

You want to act like you’re the biggest bitch on the block, DENYING that what WHO you really are is someone that has given it her best efforts in that ring only to prove time and time again that despite her best efforts, she’s never really been THAT good… if she was ever good at all. You ARE who you are Bea…

You’ll never be the biggest bitch on the block…

You’re probably never going to be a solo champion in SCW….

You’re damn sure never going to be a main event player in the Bombshells division… I mean sheesh, how many Bombshells that have joined this roster after you, back in December 2019, have passed you by and won a singles championship? Like 10? Let’s see… Krystal, Ariana, Kayla, Myra, Aleesha, Masque, Melissa, Alexandra… oh and that last one DEFINITELY speaks volumes about you in the worst way… Amber was another… Kat Jones… yeah, that’s at LEAST 10 right there. I wouldn’t be shocked if there were even more than that. You have had PLENTY of time to PROVE a damn thing and all you have been able to prove is that you are little more than your husband’s arm candy. At least he’s won some singles titles here. You?

At WHAT point do you realize that YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE as a professional wrestler and that the only thing you are good at as far as this company is concerned is just being Bill’s manager? I’mnot saying you’re special or that you’re THE only perennial loser in this business. I mean, not EVERYONE can be a main eventer. Not EVERYONE can win a singles championship. Not EVERYONE can be good enough to win half or even a third of their matches. SOME people are just meant to be the bottom of the barrel… or I suppose in your case, some people are meant to be the proverbial gatekeeper of this damn division. And it’s OKAY, Bea… if that’s what makes you a good living, then so be it. If you’re HAPPY with being the gatekeeper that people run up the score on as you’ve been for nearly four years, then who am I to stop you from such a piss poor destiny?

You’ve peaked as a professional wrestler, let me be brutally honest about that. And that peak? It might as well have been the size of an anthill.

‘BUT I’VE BEATEN THE CURRENT ROULETTE CHAMPION TWICE…” you say. “I BEAT HER BY SUBMISSION!” You even dated your wins against her too and… I REALLY think you’re fucking GONE in the head, Bea. As if your delusional bullshit wasn’t bad enough, I HAPPENED to look back at the footage and the first time you beat Alexandra, Luna Vanity distracted her! You couldn’t even win on your own! Luna distracted her and you took advantage… by winning with a ROLL UP PIN! You said going into that triple threat that you beat her on April 9th by SUBMISSION… when you DIDN’T. If you’re that DENSE that you can’t even remember HOW you won a match, then I KNOW that you will have NO idea how to handle someone like me coming off a win against Roxi Johnson. Granted, yes the second time you beat her by submission… but again, you couldn’t do it on your own. Bobbie created a distraction with her own music. You took advantage of it. So tell me, Bea. When was the last fucking time you actually won a match on your own and not because of other people’s distractions? I’m WAITING…

Come on bitch, lay it on me.

Can you even NAME your last win without help from anyone else including your own husband? I bet you can’t. I don’t think ANYONE can and that speaks volumes about you in the WORST way. By the way, in that triple threat match that you had? Oh you bragged all night long about how you submitted Alexandra twice… even though it was really just ONCE… and what did all of that bragging get you? Oh wait… yet another loss in a championship contender’s situation as if losing those mixed tag title opportunities with Bill wasn’t bad enough and it’s that kind of futility that really makes me misunderstand why you even continue to get opportunities at championships when you’ve shown no signs of improvement over nearly four years of being on this roster.

Who won that triple threat? Oh right, Alexandra did.

Who got pinned? OH… WAIT… that was YOU!

What a SHOCK! NOT!

And unlike when YOU had assistance BOTH times you won against her, Alexandra had no help at all in beating you so that, to me, says that if it wasn’t for the likes of Luna or Bobbie distracting her, she would’ve beaten you those two other times as well. Yet, you want to act like you deserve this, you deserve that, and that you’ve actually proven anything? Because in the grand scheme of things, despite your denial and despite your delusion, as far as anything POSITIVE in your Sin City Career goes, you haven’t proven a damn thing. Your biggest problem as far as your career is concerned is that you have more desire to hold a championship than you have a desire to improve in any possible way and you think that winning any championship at all is going to erase whatever stigma is already attached to your bullshit!

You can’t win a championship without improving. I know. I’ve been there. Hell, putting everything the way I’ve put it so far, I think I feel even MORE insulted going from Roxi to you. Still, at the end of the day? After Violent Conduct? I can already say that I’ve proven myself more in this company than you have proven yourself in your own right. As much as I can’t stand Roxi and all, I will even say that you’re not good enough to beat her even on HER worst day. I KNOW going into this match, that after my win at Violent Conduct, I AM about to be noticed in this company. You on the other hand? After I beat you? You can go back to doing the same rinse, lather, repeat shit you do every single promo where you talk about how losing doesn’t bother you, yet you take potshots at people that bash you for your record here, or whether you result to name calling like you’re still in high school, or talk about how you’ll win because you’re taller than the other girl or weigh more than the other girl, make these empty threats about kicking someone’s ass, bring in your cheap, hired, media correspondents to talk to because you have no friends on this roster, or bring out your Metaphor of the Week with your garbage, Saturday Night Live style auditions that have people laughing AT you, not WITH you…

Have I checked off all the boxes yet?”

Julianna pauses and winks before wrapping things up.

“Because this Sunday, it’s a clash of someone that HAS evolved over the years she’s been in this business and KNOWS how to be REAL and KNOWS who she is… and someone that REFUSES to evolve or change or do anything different and who can’t accept the fact that when it comes to being in the upper echelon of this company as she BADLY wants to be… that she just can’t fucking cut it. So for ONCE, on Sunday, you have something to celebrate Bea…

Not a win…

Not a championship…

But your LANDMARK 50th loss in SCW, a futility that few… if ANY… has ever seen in this company’s history!

DJ, hit the music…”

Julianna scoffs as she shoves the plain cake onto the ground and walks away while the DJ in the party venue plays “You’re PItiful” by Weird Al Yankovic. Julianna walks up to the camera, has one last laugh, and then shuts it off feeling pretty damn good about her chances of winning come Sunday night against the literal Groundhog’s Day of the Bombshells Division.

9
Climax Control Archives / Breakaway
« on: July 28, 2023, 11:46:26 PM »
July 16, 2023

Julianna managed to come away with a strong victory in her Sin City Wrestling debut against Blast from the Past finalist Dawn Warren. But, those that heard what she had to say before and after the fact know that for her, it was ‘just another day in the office;. Shortly after Climax Control finished airing, Julianna leaves a restaurant in Rome near the Colosseum and she finds herself shocked when there is a small group of fans that are waiting for her. There are some signs written in Italian that are actually supportive of her and knowing the language herself, she’s frozen in surprise when she realizes this small group of fans is actually rooting for her.

“The fans back at the Colosseum hated me but the ones here…” Julianna thinks to herself. “They’re on MY side?”

Julianna listens in on some of the supportive things that the fans are saying in Italian, among them…

“You wrestle just like your dad if not better!”

“We’re so glad you finally got to wrestle here!”

“You did such an amazing job representing Italy!”

“Please come back to us soon!”

Julianna has been around long enough to know that she has her fans that think outside of the conventional wisdom, largely the “Internet fans” that praise her on message boards if they’re not writing fan fictions about being with her. She rolls her eyes and turns, walking down the street and acting as if it’s no big deal. She finds it a bit difficult to get away from the fans without security detail, though they’re not seeking to harm her in any way. She does her very best to ignore all the autograph requests she’s getting from this small, but passionate group of people.

“People can love me, or they can hate me…” she thinks to herself. “But in all honesty? I don’t do what I do for them. I’ve been there, I’ve done that. It’s not for me. If I were to lower myself to the level of people like this, then I lose my edge. Period. In a company like Sin City Wrestling, I can’t afford to lose my edge like that.”

Eventually, the fans realize she’s not going to stop for them and they leave her alone but she’s not quite done getting away from people yet. An older man, about her father’s age, stops her in her tracks and recognizes her even though she may not seem to recognize the man herself right away.

“Julianna…” the man says in English, which catches the attention of the 28-year-old two time world champion. “...long time no see!”

Julianna narrows her eyes with skepticism, especially since the man has a slight resemblance to her own father.

“...I’m sorry. You are?”

“You don’t remember me?” the older man says in his Brooklyn-style accent. “You don’t remember your old Uncle Vito, eh?”

Julianna’s eyes widen as she DOES remember.

“I haven’t seen you since you were about half your size. I think you were what? Maybe 8?”

“...I DO remember…” Julianna doesn’t know what to think about this unexpected reunion with someone on her father’s side of the family. “I would’ve thought you’d been at my father’s funeral or something…”

“I was for a bit… but I missed you then.”

“Can I ask you why you’re here?”

“I just happen to be in town visiting my mother… your grandmother. I heard you were going to be here to wrestle and as it turns out, I was at the Colosseum.”

“So you saw me submit that idiot dog Dawn Warren?” Julianna asks with a scoff.

“I sure as hell did!” Uncle Vito says with a smirk on his face. “It was damn impressive. I’ve seen you wrestle on television a bunch of times, but it was the first time I got to do so in person. I gotta say, in person? Your skill is that much more impressive. Your old man certainly trained you well.”

“My mother trained me too, you know!” Julianna says with some anger in her voice as she folds her arms, clearly showing the displeasure at hearing a compliment about a father that she not only hates so much, but is trying to move on from.

“How’s Elise doing, by the way?”

“My mother’s fine” Julianna says with a sigh, showing some sudden discomfort. “But, hi, good to see you after 20 years. I’m glad you like my work. I mean, you seem to like it a hell of a lot better than my dad ever did.”

“I wouldn’t say that…” Uncle Vito says, largely assurring, but also unaware of the disdain that Julianna has for her father. “You reminded me so much of your dad out there. In fact, if he were still here, he’d be very proud of you.”

Julianna gets angrier and this anger is harder to hide as her uncle noticed her rolling her eyes.

“What’s wrong, Julianna? Did I offend you?”

“Did my father ever talk to you in recent years about our relationship?” Julianna questions, catching her uncle by surprise.

“He would always say that things between you two were always great and that he was happy with how quick and how strong you were moving up the wrestling ranks…” Uncle Vito answers, causing Julianna to laugh.

“And you believed everything that he told you?”

“He was my brother, Julianna. He’d have no reason to lie to me.”

“I hate to break it to you, Vito. He did. So much. I hate my father. In fact, I was hesitant to even come here knowing that I was coming back to his home country.”

“But it worked out in the end, didn’t it?”

“That’s not the point! I HATED my father. I didn’t cry at his funeral at all.”

Vito’s eyes are the one widening in shock now.

“He was your father, Julianna…”

“SINCE WHEN?” Julianna snaps back, further catching him by surprise.

“What do you mean since when? He raised you and took you under his wing to train you to be a wrestler. Well, he and your mother both, but you know what I mean. What happened? Why do you have so much anger toward him?”

“He would run me down and treat me like garbage every time I did something wrong. Look, with all due respect… I DON’T want to recap how he treated me in the early part of my career. I will say that there was plenty of verbal and emotional abuse and I always felt like no matter what I did, I was never going to please him and you suddenly waltzing back into my life, completely ignorant, singing his praises and telling me how all he did was say nice things about me when I know the truth about how he felt about me is REALLY triggering. I don’t even know why you even wanted to find me. It’s not like I wanted to go and seek out any extended family on his side or anything. I came to Rome just to wrestle and I’ve done that. I didn’t come here for unwanted family reunions. I know he was your brother and everything, but to me? He’s always going to be a piece of shit! Sorry… NOT sorry!”

Vito takes a minute or two to process what he just heard. Julianna is even holding back tears remembering that her father never wanted a relationship with her, but that he would tell extended family that everything was okay even though things weren’t. Vito lets out a sigh, which worries Julianna a bit.

“On one hand, you’ve been a very successful wrestler… even more successful than both of your parents…” Vito admits. “And whether you like it or not, much of your wrestling pedigree in the ring does remind me of him. You don’t exactly follow everything he ever did to a tee though…”

“You’re right, I don’t. I DID at first, but doing everything HIS way didn’t get me anywhere. Once I started doing things MY way, that’s when I actually became successful. But WHATEVER, you want to be an enabler of abuse, take his side, and act like my side of the story doesn’t FUCKING MATTER then be my guest. It’s not like I have anything to lose by just NOT being a part of this MESSED UP FAMILY!”

Vito tries to wrap an arm around her.

“Julianna, please…”

“Don’t touch me…”

Julianna gently moves away from her uncle.

“Just take my dad’s side and get it over with so I can be done with this fucking family already.”

“We’re not ALL like him, Julianna…”

“Wait… what?” Julianna says, surprised by what she heard.

‘Did your old man always tell you that you’d never amount to anything?”

Julianna nods.

“Join the club…” Vito says, shocking her.

“Excuse me?”

“I believe you. He would treat me the same way when we were growing up. I always thought it was a big bro, little bro thing but once I realized he was treating Elise the same way, I realized that was just his personality. I kept in touch with him just to stay cordial and to not hold a grudge, you know. But I was HOPING that he wouldn’t extend the way he treats people to you. I’m so sorry, Julianna. I should’ve known better.”

Julianna lets out a sigh, though not of anger, but more of relief.

“I’m so sorry, I thought everyone was the same as him” Julianna says, processing the shock of everything that she just heard.

“But look at it this way…” Vito adds. “...I said that you were just as good as him but honestly, you were even BETTER. I’ve never seen your father… or hell… even your mother with all due respect to her. You’ve got something that neither of them, especially your father, had and that’s a true, burning passion for this business. It’s no wonder that you became the star that they didn’t. I don’t need to know everything that your old man put you through because I believe it. What’s important is that you managed to get through it because you had the passion and the dedication to. I followed the careers of your parents before you were born and they were fine wrestlers. But, they didn’t have the “it” factor that you do.”

Julianna is still feeling conflicted knowing that this unexpected reunion turned out to be so much better than she imagined it ever could.

“I know that this is weird for you right now, Julianna…”

“Yeah, it is. But, I’m touched that my father’s side of the family isn’t full of fuck ups, you know. Look, I will be honest for you. I don’t do this for family, I do this for me…”

“No, I understand that. That’s how it should have always been and how it should always be. I’ve been following your career and I saw how you struggled at the start of it before you suddenly broke out and became the star that you’ve become and that you’re still growing into.”

“Thanks Vito… I mean that. Seriously. It’s not often that I actually get noticed for what I do in professional wrestling. It’s quite an annoyance if we’re being honest.”

“Family’s always going to appreciate you no matter what. Maybe that’s something you should start thinking about a little bit more.”

“My mother didn’t put you up to this did she?” Julianna asks, still expressing skepticism.

“I haven’t talked to her in years, but I’m glad she’s doing well.”

“What about my grandmother?” Julianna asks, suddenly taking an interest.

“As well as she can be for her age….” Vito mentions. “I think you were maybe 10 the last time you saw her.”

“Can I see her?” she asks all of a sudden.

“Right now? Well, it’s late and she’s probably out for the night. But, we’ll surprise her tomorrow morning. How does that sound?”

Julianna actually smiles at this.

“I’d love that. It was nice seeing you again and it’s nice to know that you’re not my father…”

The two embrace for a moment.

“Likewise…”

The two part ways shortly after that and now Julianna suddenly is in much happier mood than she would ever imagine she would be coming back to her father’s home country. Sher’s not the type of person that would admit this out loud, but she knows deep down that with deleting her father’s old voicemails and an unexpected reunion that went just as unexpectedly great, that she’s finally beginning to heal from everything she went through because of him.

Julianna however, happens to be deep in thought as she continues to walk back to her hotel.

“I’m fortunate…” Julianna admits to herself in her thoughts. “...not just from the fact that my father’s family isn’t so bad all in all, but the fact that I at least had ONE parent that wasn’t such a fuck up of a person… ONE parent that actually TRIED to understand me and pushed me not just to be better, but to break away.

…I’ll never forget the way she reached out to me during the rock bottom of my career…”

Christmas 2019

Julianna certainly had a difficult 2019 for the most part as far as her wrestling career is concerned. Then at the age of 25, she finds herself in the living room of her parents’s home. Her father is nowhere in sight as he had gone back to Italy to see his family and that’s exactly how Julianna prefers it. She’s lamenting many things at this point as she just sips some hot chocolate while rolling her eyes at the “Charlie Brown Christmas Special” that is playing on her mother’s television. Julianna clearly has no Christmas spirit this year as her mother walks in and sits down next to her.

“What’s wrong?” her mother asks, immediately knowing that Julianna isn’t right.

“It’s finally over…” Julianna responds.

“What’s over?” her mother asks, before suddenly widens her eyes. “Wait, you didn’t quit wrestling, did you?”

“No. But I left Portland Pro…”

Her mother takes in the surprise announcement that she just heard, smiling and then wrapping an arm around her. Julianna would normally resist in this situation, but considering her sullen mood, she’s not even doing so at this point.

“I’m glad. That place was making you miserable from everything that you were telling me.”

“I really do not want to talk about that place anymore. I just… I don’t know… all I can really say about it is that I just wanted a fresh start. I had my ups and downs while I was over there, but when it came to trying to break through and get to that next level, I just never could. This was definitely the worst year of my career so far…”

“Don’t give them that power, Julianna. You still managed to win a title there.”

“It wasn’t the worst year of my career because of them. It was the worst year of my career because I completely lost my sanity and I lost my identity and I lashed out in the worst way and I was nearly committed to the psych ward at one point…”

“You got better though…” her mother reminds her.

“Yeah, just in time for the holidays right?”

“You know how I asked you a few months ago why you behaved the way you did all year when you lost your mind? Are you ready to answer that question now?”

Julianna doesn’t even know whether to laugh or cry in the moment as she reflects on her 2019. She remembers how all she wanted to do was hurt other people threatening people with the worst kind of ultraviolence you can imagine from wanting to chop people up with chainsaws to threatening to burn people’s homes down. She feels nothing but shame, especially since her loss of self-control was by far the biggest reason fro 2019 being the worst year of her career.

“Yeah, I’m ready. I was lashing out because I wanted to burn down and destroy everything my dad taught me about professional wrestling. I lashed out because I didn’t want to do it his way anymore and I just didn’t know how else to go about it. I know I embarrassed you and worried you and I’m sorry for that. But, it was a culmination of years of abuse just coming out of me and taking it out on everything and anything in sight. I’ve had this business all wrong. But, I admit, it’s frustrating that I can’t reach my fullest potential. I look at everything around me, seeing wrestlers less talented than me win world titles, and I’m wondering when the hell I’m finally going to break through and win one for myself.”

“That’s all understandable…”

“I realize that doing everything my father’s way is no longer the way to go and I’m DONE following his example.”

“GOOD!” Julianna’s mother says with pride in her voice.

“I realize that the example I should’ve been following is yours all along.”

This comment catches her mother’s attention, but Julianna is quick to notice that her mother isn’t exactly welcoming this with open arms.

“My father was all about ego and making everything revolve around him. I mean for fuck’s sake, when I was born, he still kept wrestling instead of, you know, trying to be a dad and everything. But you? You were all about class, you were all about dignity. You were never a selfish person when it came to the business or anything. You gave up your career for me and I’m always going to appreciate that and you were successful back in Germany without ever having to resort to the crap that my father pulled in his career.”

“Right… yeah…”

“Wow Mom, I thought you would’ve been happy to know that I’m going to follow your example now…”

“Julianna… honey… I have a huge piece of advice for you that you need to hear.”

“What’s that?”

“Don’t…”

“Sorry?”

“Don’t follow my example. You followed your father’s and look where that got you. Of course, my example is a far better example, but ask yourself this. How many wrestlers in the business, especially nowadays, try to follow their parents’s example and wind up being flops?”

“A whole ton…” Julianna admits. “I’ve constantly beaten wrestlers like that over my own career.”

“Exactly. You’re struggling because you started trying to fill your father’s shoes. Don’t try to fill mine. In fact, when it comes to your own career, don’t even think or worry about me at all. This isn’t about me or making me proud. This is about you and your career. Do this for YOU. if you want to move past Portland Pro and if you want to prove that you are serious about being a world champion, that’s exactly what you are going to do. You are not me, Julianna. I never, ever expected, or even wanted you to be me. I’m going to tell you straight up, and I’m not saying this to put myself down or anything, but if you try to be me going forward in your career, you’re going to continue to struggle and you’re going to continue to stay stuck in mediocrity. I know I should’ve trained and taught you better myself, but if you take away ONE thing from ANYTHING I’ve ever tried to teachy you, for the sake of your career, it’s THIS.”

“I never thought of it like that…” Julianna admits as she takes a sip of her hot chocolate. In her own mind, however, she is starting to grow a bit confused. “...but… there’s a big problem. I get that you’re saying that I should do this for me and that I should do this my way… but… I don’t even know what ‘my way’ even is…”

Julianna’s mother lets out a sigh, knowing all too well how difficult it is to find oneself in this business. There’s some silence for a second as Julianna’s mother shuts off the television and processes how to proceed with how to help her.

“That’s why second generation wrestlers often fail…” Julianna’s mother adds. “They think that doing this the same way, or a similar way, that their parents do, is what is going to make them successful when it’s really their own identity that does it. The thing is, most second generation wrestlers are so tied up with trying to be their parents that they never find their own identity and as a result, they struggle like hell. I don’t want you to be another one of those second generation failures and that’s why I’m telling you this. Screw your father and hell, screw me too! Find your own way, find out who the hell you are in this business and start being successful the way you and I both know you can be successful, okay?”

Julianna is in a happy state of shock but her eyes are lighting up knowing that her mother effectively freed her from the pressure of ever having to live up to her parents and whatever expectations they once had of her when she first broke into this business.

“I won’t promise you’ll win a world championship…” her mother continues. “But I can promise you you’ll be more successful, and so much happier overall, with your career.”

“How do I start?”

“You start with figuring out who you WANT to be and what you’ll do differently to get to that point. It’s not as hard as you think it is, trust me.”

Julianna nods, understanding what she just heard.

July 16, 2023

“That conversation with my mother changed my entire career for the better and from a wrestling standpoint, giving me that advice was the best thing that she has ever done for me…” Julianna reflects as she gets closer to her hotel. “I look around and I see many Bombshells on the roster with family ties… whether it’s their parents or whether it’s anyone else that they are related to, and plenty of them fail to grasp what this business is all about because they’re stuck on the name of someone else when the only name that they should be worrying about is their own. Dawn Warren? Perfect example. I knew that bitch was beaten when the opening bell rang because all she gave a shit about was making the Warren name better… if it wasn’t her stupid wedding.

BUT… that’s what sets me apart from the back in the Bombshells division.

I am NOT relying on the legacy of a parent.

I am NOT trying to restore prestige to a name that was destroyed by others.

I am NOT giving a FUCK about disappointing someone that is close to me.

I am NOT giving a FUCK about living up to the prestige of a supposed wrestling school that half the Bombshells roster went to.

I’ve been there, and I’ve done that for the most part… and when I compete in my next match? They’re going to continue to learn exactly what I am all about and what I bring to this division…”

Julianna enters the hotel, obviously in a stronger, better mood with how well everything has gone for her in Italy up to this point.

July 28, 2023

The Old Summer Palace in Beijing, once a pride of the city, but in ruins since the 1860’s. Julianna stands near the center of the area with the camera on and she looks around with plenty to think about. Most specifically however, she is thinking about her match with Laura Phoenix. As far as Laura goes, Julianna doesn’t seem impressed by her. She knows that she’s a mother of a former Sin City Wrestling bombshell and she’s also aware of her success… or lack thereof, in the grand scheme of things. She’s feeling just as confident as she was going into her debut match as she begins to speak.

“I suppose visiting a ruined part of the city is fitting, yes? I mean, this is pretty much Dawn Warren after I was through with her. But you know what these ruins behind me also represent? It represents a legacy that one is trying FAR too long to hang onto. Let’s be real here. Beijing was once a destination city with all the history behind it. It was once THE place to be in the Far East. But over time, whether it’s because of all the environmental neglect or whether it’s because other areas of the region like Seoul and Tokyo have clearly passed it by, Beijing is no longer that destination. Beijing is a legacy in decline, one that people just don’t give that much of a damn about and it seems as though, in my book, this decline is going to continue. If that sounds familiar, this should remind you of Laura Phoenix… who… honestly? Just like this city, she’s hanging on to a legacy that is not as bright as it was and just like this city, she’s trying way too hard to stay relevant in the grand scheme of things.

And no Laura, I am not going to make quips or jokes about your age. I know that around this business, there are some wrestlers close to your age that are having the best time of their careers at the moment. But let me ask you this. Ever since you came to Sin City Wrestling, what have you actually… you know… ACCOMPLISHED? You’ve won just as many matches as you have lost, to be fair. You’re hanging in there decently, But when it comes to trying to make a name for yourself and taking that next step? You’re ALWAYS falling short! You couldn’t beat Kayla Richards for the Internet CHampionship at Into the Void… a match that I, by the way, happened to look at and I know that while you gave it your very best effort, you were simply outclassed in the end. You had your chance at Summer XXXtreme to be a champion when you fought for the Roulette Championship in that degrading, stupid spectacle of a pool match and you lost again. But hey, no worries! You got another chance to be the Bombshells Roulette Champion against Jessie Salco a couple of weeks ago and while I was making a serious impression and making a Blast from the Past finalist tap out to continue her downward spiral in this company, you were in the main event against Jessie…

Wait… WHAT?”

Julianna pauses and scoffs, almost as if she can’t believe what she just heard.

“...Jessie Salco and Laura Phoenix main evented a Climax Control? Oh dear lord, has this division accepted mediocrity to THAT degree that THEY are main eventing a show? Regardless of whether that is the case or not, the fact of the matter is, you couldn’t get it done against Jessie and you lost to her. Again. When I first heard of you, I thought of a woman that has made a name for herself over the years. But in light of the fact that you can’t even defeat one of the most washed women on the roster… and I don’t even know HOW she is the Roulette Champion at ALL by the way… maybe it’s about time you reconsider whether Sin City Wrestling is a good career move after all. I mean, you haven’t been TERRIBLE… but you’re just… THERE. I hear you talk leading up to the matches and it’s like you WANT to have that fire of the Phoenix, but you LACK in that fire. You barely had anything to say about the match at Summer XXXtreme. You just went on and on about how Mercedes respects nobody and how Jessie respects you and I look at that and go… “NO WONDER YOU LOST”...

Because as far as I’m concerned? This business isn’t about respect. You hold yourself back worrying about something so trivial and stupid. You think I’m going to walk n here having any sort of respect for you? NOPE! I don’t! I have no respect for someone that should know better being the veteran that she is when it comes to being a student of the game and evolving as she goes but ultimately, doesn’t. You even mentioned that you haven’t held a title in this business since 2016, which of course, was before I even broke the mainstream myself the next year, and shouldn’t that tell you something, Laura? Shouldn’t that tell you that maybe it’s time to change things up and take a different approach instead of doing the same fucking thing that you were doing seven years ago?

Apparently not, because after you lost to Jessie the first time and then happened to face her again two weeks ago, I didn’t see any sort of indicator from you that you actually learned anything from that defeat at Summer XXXtreme… and even if you did? There was clearly no indication at all that you applied anything you learned from that defeat, You took the open challenge from Jessie… but honestly, you should’ve just stood aside and let someone better take it. You went into that match with Jessie STILL lacking that fire… on top of the fact that you insulted half of my heritage doing that Roman Warrior bit in the Colosseum. YAWN! How stereotypical of you? How many people are going to do a promo at the Great Wall of China this week? But hey, it serves to further prove how DATED you are, not to mention that your motivations going into that match were beyond pathetic. No seriously, you were going into that match talking about what? The fact that your challenge to Jessie is something that defines your legacy and forces a path to redemption? And YOU are one to talk about low hanging fruit, right? Because as far as low hanging fruit is concerned, Jessie Salco might as well be among the lowest hanging fruit in the Bombshells division at the moment even WITH the Roulette Championship.

No seriously, think about it.

Beating JESSIE SALCO defines your legacy? THAT is exactly what I am talking about when it comes to a lack of fire, passion and drive because let me tell you something future grandma, and I mean that literally and not as a knock on your age, beating a Hall of Fame member on top of their game like a Roxi Johnson, for as fucking overrated as she is in general, mind you… THAT is a legacy definer. Case in point with the current Bombshells champion who literally did just that by dethroning the bitch. THAT is what you call having a passion and a fire for this and actually reaching for the damn stars.

But YOU?

You reach for fucking JESSIE SALCO? Are you KIDDING ME?

You have to beat HER to have any sort of redemption? Well congratulations, you LOST to her. AGAIN! So how is your legacy defined now? Just another Bombshell on the roster that isn’t standing out or making a name for herself at all? If that match with Jessie defines your legacy, then losing to her completely flushed it down the fucking toilet… as if YOUR DAUGHTER hasn’t done that enough in this company….

Julianna takes a pause, knowing that she’s REALLY about to twist the knife when it comes to Laura Phoenix.

“Yeah… I know ALL about your daughter. And hey, I wish her well with becoming a mother herself and everything, but when it comes to Sin City Wrestling and being unable to break through when it matters the most in this company and when it comes to a general sense of mediocrity, I look at YOUR career so far in this company and I also look at the career that Bella Madison had and the one thing that REALLY sticks out to me is that the mediocrity as far as Sin City Wrestling is concerned TRULY runs in the family. Your daughter was part of this company for HOW long? And how many singles championships did she win? Oh right, that’s a big fat zero. How many singles title matches did she have? If I have my knowledge of SCW history up to par, I’d say that number is at least in the double digits… and she lost every single one of them! Literally her only accomplishment was a Mixed Tag team Championship that she only lasted one supercard cycle with… and it’s representative of your whole family lineage considering that the only thing she ever did when she was in this company… wasn’t even something that she did on her own.

In fact, let me twist the knife JUST a little bit further…

Her lack of success in Sin City Wrestling? It’s the TRUE representation of your legacy… your legacy as someone who CLEARLY didn’t train her well enough and dare I say, it represents the fact that when it comes to the professional wrestling business, you turned out to be a FAILURE of a mother! I want you to think about your daughter’s career and tell me if you feel guilty about her lack of success here. I want you to consider YOUR career in Sin City Wrestling so far and I want you to wonder if you are TRULY setting a good example for her with how “mid” you’ve been so far.  Think about the grandbaby you’re about to have. Are you setting a good example for her? Are you?

NO! Someone like you is someone that SHOULD be doing better, but isn’t because they’re too satisfied with what they’ve done in their career and you think I AM? HELL NO! I’ve got a couple of world championships to my name. I was a champion as recent as this year, and you think I’m fucking happy? NO! You think being a Hall of Fame member of another company makes me happy? NO! You think being a wrestler of the year in another company satisfies me? NO! I came here, to Sin City Wrestling, because unlike YOU, I didn’t get fat and happy and satisfied! I came here to push myself further, to test myself against some of the absolute best and while I would personally consider you a stronger, better competitor than Dawn Warren, the fact of the matter is, you’re really NOT that much better than her! The fact of the matter is that your daughter turned out to be an also-ran in this company because whether she wants to admit it or not, she tried FAR too hard to follow your example…

She tried WAY too hard to live up to YOUR legacy… or whatever the hell is left of it at this point.

And what did that get her?

NOTHING but a tag team championship she only held for two months anyway.

I get it though, because I made the same mistake your daughter did when I first started my career and even though I accomplished this and accomplished that here and there, the fact of the matter is that my career didn’t start going places until I decided I was through trying to live up to the legacy of my parents. MAYBE instead of being selfish and trying to hang onto your legacy so damn bad, you should’ve done what my mother did with me and that’s sit her down and tell her to NOT follow your example…

…especially since… from the looks of things in your SCW career so far… it’s not even a GOOD example!

You should’ve let her experiment on her own and let her try to make a name for herself without trying to live up to what you’ve done in this business. Or I guess Sass and Bash and Wolfslair were attempts at that? Either way, neither deal worked out for her either.

You failed your daughter when it came to preparing her for this business, you failed her when you couldn’t beat Jessie for the Roulette Championship on two occasions and guess what? On Sunday, you’re going to fail her again because I am going to do what I did in my debut and that’s walk into that ring in a famous international landmark against someone that is coming off of a loss in a championship match and I am going to beat them because unlike you, unlike your daughter, unlike Dawn Warren, I don’t hold onto a family name like a crutch. I do what your daughter should’ve done and that’s break away from the family name and subsequently break away from the pack. Thank fucking god that my mother is a far better one than you’ll ever be, especially when it comes to the professional wrestling business and if you happen to hear my words and happen to get pissed off?

GOOD!

Because I don’t want the Laura Phoenix that thinks that beating JESSIE SALCO defines her legacy as if she is completely incapable of striving for anything higher. I don’t want the Laura Phoenix that speaks in platitudes and lives in this delusion that if she works hard enough and she tries SO MUCH that everything will turn out okay in the end. What I want is the Laura Phoenix on top of her game. I want you to show me ANY fire at all that you can give because the fact of the matter is, I DON’T think that what you’ve shown in Sin City Wrestling so far IS truly your best. Honestly. I want to know what all the hype is about and if pushing the right buttons is what is going to get the best aura Phoenix that I can get, then so be it because ultimately, when I DO beat you, I want to know that I got the best out of you and that I’m not beating someone that just might be hanging on for too long.

You TALK about having that fire within you… but either that fire just isn’t strong enough n the end or you don’t have the fire that you think you do.

But me?

I don’t just TALK about having the fire… I BE about it! I AM that fire… the one that’s going to burn you down to the ground! I’m going to be a champion around here before too long, mark my words on that, Laura. I’ll show you what a real fire looks like and after I beat you? Reevaluate things. Hell, reevaluate everything. Because I think more than anything, other than a TRUE fire you can ride to this REDEMPTION you want THAT badly, is a reckoning that you desperately need to light said fire under your ass.

BE BETTER, Laura…

Because settling for Jessie Salco to define your legacy then losing to her twice ain’t it.

Or are you just too scared to aim higher than that?

Well, this Sunday, that’s exactly what you get to do… and I’m about to reveal to the world exactly why you ARE too scared to aim higher…

I’ll show the world why breaking away from a legacy and doing right by you and you alone is the way to go.

Let Sunday be a lesson on how to TRULY build a legacy to be proud of…

Julianna leaves the scene, having no regrets about any of the stinging words that she just said. The camera takes one last shot of the ruins she spoke her mind from before the shot fades to black.

10
Climax Control Archives / Head of the Class
« on: July 14, 2023, 11:36:41 PM »
July 9, 2023

Julianna DiMaria is not a woman that has a high tolerance for nonsense or even the slightest inconvenience. As much of a veteran of the game as she is, even the silliest little thing tends to have her be annoyed, angry, or any other related emotion. As she stands in her kitchen, she happens to be holding her phone and she has that annoyed expression on her face. She lets out a sigh and she’s starting to express some reluctance in her eyes too. But, she can’t stay angry for too long as she hears a bit of a celebratory squeal from her mother who is walking in with some of Julianna’s belongings. Julianna widens her eyes as she is perplexed by her mother suddenly being so happy.

“What the hell are you so happy about?” Julianna asks with a tone of annoyance in her voice.

“I just heard the news…” her mother, a former wrestler in her own right, says with a hint of excitement in her voice. “...you’re going to ITALY! Yearning the news of your new job was awesome, but now this on top of that? The only country that would make me more excited for you is Germany for obvious reasons of course…”

Julianna rolls her eyes at her mother obviously having a favoritism for her home country.

“...but still, I am so happy for you, young lady!”

“Italy…” Julianna says with a scoff. “...sure, what a fucking dream that is…”

Her mother narrows her eyes realizing that Julianna is not even half as happy about the situation as she is.

“I thought making your SCW debut in Italy would be exciting for you, Julianna…”

“Mom, would you quit being so ignorant? Italy is literally the last country I would ever want to visit. You know why. Two words: sperm donor.”

Mrs. DiMaria’s excitement and jubilation comes to a sudden halt once her late husband is brought up.

“Do you think I want to go to my father’s country after all the shit that he put me through?”

“It’s the first time that you’ve ben there ever since your mainstream career got started and I understand why that would be hard for you. But, you and I both know that no matter how rough your relationship was with your father…”

“You’re making a massive understatement of a lifetime, mother…” Julianna says, the bitterness about the subject matter clearly evident in her own eyes. “Where do you want me to start? We can start with my wrestling training when he was expecting me to be bloody perfect and flawless all the damn time. Remember when I was wrestling in the Indies and literally after just five matches he was blowing up my phone asking me why a major league wrestling company hadn’t signed me yet?”

Mrs. DiMaria tugs her collar indicating her own nervousness about the situation.

“How about every single time he would verbally abuse me every time I would even lose a match? Hey, remember when I was a rookie and he cursed me out in front of everyone because I lost a match to a Cinderella story in a tournament that ultimately meant nothing? Oh wait… how about the time he told me that if he had it his way, he’d have a son instead of a daughter all because I lost my first championship and how many times he repeated that statement to me every single time I lost a match via submission? You can’t just sweep that under the rug, mother. Going to Italy is just going to remind me of him, the fact that I HATE him, the fact that I’m SO GLAD that he’s in the fucking grave, and how much of a piece of shit he is. Do you even want me to get started on how he ruined my childhood because he wanted to throw me into the wrestling life so damn young? All those slumber parties I missed because I had to watch him wrestle on tape?”

“I think I get your point now, Julianna…” Mrs. DiMaria says with a regretful sigh. “I can’t apologize enough for how I was treating you during that time too.”

“I was able to forgive you because I know that my father was a control freak and he was roping you through all of this. I am not going to be able to walk anywhere in Italy without even thinking about him and that’s the part that sucks for me. How am I even supposed to wrestle my match knowing that I’m going to have brain fog because of him? God, it’s like I’m going to be wrestling in that dark shadow that he has always cast over my career….”

Julianna lets out a sigh and she’s not even angry anymore. In fact, she’s more downtrodden than you would expect someone of her attitude to be. Of course, Julianna would never be the type to show this level of sadness in public. She knows she’d be ridiculed for even a hint of weakness… even if her experiences with her father are the only reason why she feels that would even be true. Regardless, her mother approaches her and puts an arm around her.

“Sit with me for a minute…”

Mrs. DiMaria leads Julianna to the couch and they both take a seat.

“I understand that your father was harsh…”

“You don’t understand the half of it…” Julianna interrupts as she pulls out her phone. “I saved all the voicemails over the years…”

“What?” her mother says, understandably perplexed.

“You have to hear these…”

“Julianna…”

Julianna doesn’t pause for a second as she begins to play the voicemails.

“New message: August 1, 2018…

“ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS, JULIANNA?”

Julianna cringes at hearing her father’s voice again, even if it’s by a voicemail.

“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO WIN THAT MATCH! That masked blue bastard is far inferior to you considering that you defeated him before and you not only lose to him, you lose to him by SUBMISSION? MY GOD, why the fuck did I have to have a daughter that turned out to be such a pussy, huh? Why couldn’t your mother have given birth to a boy instead? You’re sleeping around, aren’t you? That must explain it. You’re not focused. You’re never focused. I can honestly say for a fact that you’re the worst regret of my life! My family back home in Italy would be ashamed of you…

New message…. May 15, 2019

That’s some career you’re having in Portland, isn’t it?”

Julianna rolls her eyes as she hears her father laugh.

“Why can’t you hang onto a title? Why are you unable to take that next step? Maybe if you would’ve taken your training more seriously this wouldn’t be happening to you. But you know, I think your mother went soft on you when we were both training you. Yeah, that has to be it. I wanted to raise and train a WORLD BEATER… a DOMINANT FORCE… someone that was going to carry on my legacy… but what the fuck do I end up with? A fucking scrub who can’t even strap on her own high heels properly. You’re the whipping bitch of Portland Pro. How does it feel? If you were wrestling in my country, you’d be shot in the head for being such a failure of a wrestler… and even worse… a failure of a daughter….”

“What?” Mrs. DiMaria asks with a gasp… stunned that she is hearing this for the first time.

“New message… October 24, 2020

“Today is the 26th anniversary of when you ruined my life. Here’s to my 12th beer or so as I drown in my misery remembering that you exist… and by the way, you’re never going to amount to anything….

New message: December 18, 2020

“WOOOOOOOW! So much for being something in Mainstream Wrestling! Once again, you lose to an inferior opponent. There’s upset queen and then there’s ‘queen of being upset’. Gracious, if your mother just aborted you, she would’ve done the whole world a favor. I should’ve divorced the bitch before you even became a thing….”

“I have no words for this…” Mrs. DiMaria admitted, probably out of all the shock that she’s dealing with.

“Now do you understand why I would rather avoid ANYTHING that has to do with him?” Julianna asks with a huge amount of anger on her face, dong the best that she can to hold back tears. “You think I WANT to go to Italy knowing that I am going to be facing reminders of all the ABUSE that he put me through?”

“He didn’t physically abuse you too did he?” her mother asks with concern. Julianna shakes her head.

“And because I know you’re going to ask… no, he didn’t abuse me THAT way either if you catch my drift…”

“Thank the lord for that. Julianna, I could never apologize enough for the fact that you couldn’t have a better father than that. I understand why going to his home country would be triggering for you, even now. But, you have to understand that despite all of that, you turned out to be SO much better than him…”

Julianna could at least smirk at this, showing that she’s at least feeling better.

“Just the fact that you broke into the American mainstream wrestling scene, which is something neither he or I were able to do, makes you better than him. But you’ve had a Hall of Fame career in Mainstream Wrestling, you’ve got two world championships to your name, which is more than both of us… combined… and you have become a success in professional wrestling YOUR way, not his way. In my eyes, that makes you a hell of a lot better than him and all of those awful things that he said to you? You and I both know that they could never be true because of everything you’ve ever accomplished. You’ve had a truly great career so far and with Sin City Wrestling, I can see that career rising even higher. You’ve got my full faith in you, I promise.”

Julianna takes a deep breath, suddenly feeling less of the nervous, bitter, triggering tension that she was feeling knowing that she has to face something that reminds her of someone that she hates more than anyone else, or anything else, in the world. She even has a soft spot in her heart and shares an embrace with her mother showing that the support and the positive sentiments that she just heard from her mean a hell of a lot to her.

“I really needed that reminder, mother. So thank you for that.”

“You’re going to shine in your father’s home country and you’re going to show exactly how much better you are than he was. “

“That’s what I am going to have to do. It’s going to be harder than I am ever going to admit on camera, but I’ve overcome him over and over again. Why wouldn’t I do so when I go to Italy and win my massive SCW debut match, huh? I guess I’ll get my stuff…”

Julianna stands up and begins to make her way to the hallway. However, her mother has one more thing to say.

“Julianna… honey…”

Julianna pauses and turns to look at her.

“You know how else you can prove that you’re a bigger, better person than your father?

“Yeah?”

“Treat other people better than you normally do…”

Julianna sighs and rolls her eyes at this.

“You realize that got me taken advantage of right?”

“I worry, honey, that when you put other people down the way you do, that you’re just like him. Sometimes, I see how you treat other people and it reminds me of him so much that it worries me…”

“Sure mother…” Julianna answers with a sigh. “Whatever…”

Julianna heads down the hallway to gather her things for her flight to Italy while her mother shakes her head behind her, disapproving of the fact that the concern that she just made was literally blown off.

This is typical of Julianna however… being as stubborn and as hard as a rock as she has always been throughout her career….

The Summer of 2017…

Julianna, in the rookie year of her mainstream wrestling career, is in tears. They’re coming down her face quite hard in the locker room after a loss that she went through in her first company ever: West Coast Genesis.

“How can you lose to HIM?” her father screams at her, not caring about the fact that she is completely broken down at this point.

“Do you realize that I’ve only had a handful of matches on a global stage, Dad?” she asks.

“It doesn’t matter! You were supposed to defeat that Ryan Keys piece of SHIT and claim that West Coast Genesis Championship and you didn’t! I gave you all the tools that you needed for success! I gave you the entire world on a silver platter! And yet, you come in here and you throw it all back in my face?”

“WHAT?!?!?!” Julianna asks, clearly confused and stunned by what she is hearing. “You’re taking it PERSONAL when it wasn’t even YOU that wrestled that match!”

“It IS personal, you IDIOT!” her father screams back at her. “I invested so much time training you and ensuring that you were going to hit the ground running once you went global and then you go in there, in your first title match ever, and you go and fuck it all up! I don’t understand how you can lose to someone like that. Ryan Keys is nothing but a pretty boy, fuckrag, womanizing piece of horseshit that doesn’t belong in professional wrestling and you lose to someone like THAT?”


“How can you sit there and call your own daughter an idiot?” she asks, hyperventilating at this point. “All because of ONE loss? It’s literally my first one since I went global…”

“Well it’s one too many!” her father screams back. “I’m not going to tolerate this shit, Julianna. You’re a woman now. Start wrestling like one. Until you redeem yourself and you actually win that belt from that pretty boy, you’re no daughter of mine…”

Julianna can only watch as her father bolts out of her locker room. She’s going through plenty of self-loathing feelings at the moment, not knowing where to go from here.

July 12, 2023

Julianna comes out of that flashback that she was just reflecting on during her flight to Italy and she’s remembering everything: the humiliation, the anger, the pain….

“I won that WCG title from Ryan Keys…” Julianna reflects in her own mind. “...and even that wasn’t good enough for him. No matter how well I did in that ring, I was never going to make him happy. He was never going to be proud of me. He was never going to accept me as a daughter. People ask me all the time why I like to disrespect people and hurt people as much as I do. It’s really none of their fucking business. Mark that down as another thing I will never discuss when the cameras are on. The early part of my career… where I was wrestling under his shadow… it literally drove me insane. It led me down a path that I would’ve never thought of going down.

It ultimately led me to a downward spiral in my career to the point where I was a literal laughingstock in this business back in like… late 2018… most of 2019…”

Julianna lets out a sigh as she continues to reflect on what was a broken, piss poor relationship with her father.

“He fueled me in the worst way because every time he left me one of this disgusting voicemails, I would always want to prove him wrong. But whenever I wouldn’t? I would just deeper and deeper into the hole. Funny, I think about this and I realize that I’m going to be a lot more complex then most of my new peers are going to give me credit for. They are going to see me as just some shallow, vain bitch that likes to talk a lot of shit and put people down. I might even get the ‘Barbie’ comparisons because of that fucking movie and how ‘in’ that cinematic trash probably is. But what they are going to learn with time is that I’ve got SO much more substance to me. It’s too fucking bad for them that by the time they realize it, it’ll be too late. They probably won’t even know about my accomplishments… the lot of them. Many wrestlers have that ‘it didn’t happen HERE’ mentality and I’m sure the Bombshells division won’t be an exception.

But still… I can’t help but remember what happened the last time I ever saw him alive….”

April 2021

Julianna reflects on the moment that just came to her mind. She’s at her mother’s house in San Diego and she has definitely decorated the place as if it was a birthday party. Julianna is holding the MAINSTREAM Wrestling World Championship she had won weeks prior and this is the first time she is seeing her mother since then. They have the most sincere embrace that they’ve ever had.

“I don’t want to say ‘I’m so proud of you’ because it would be so cliche…” her mother says with a laugh.

“I know… but… I always knew that I was capable of being a world champion in my own right even if I had so many doubters and haters along the way. I remember when my dad called me a couple of weeks ago and tried to say that I couldn’t do it… that I would never be a world champion. I proved him wrong, mother….”

Julianna has the widest smile of her whole wrestling career up to this point.

“I proved him wrong! I did it my way!”

“That you did, honey!”

“I still can’t believe this is real…”

“Not can I… really…” a familiar male voice says behind them, surprising both Julianna and her mother. Julianna quickly grows angry seeing his face.

“...get out…” Julianna is quick to say.

“Last I checked, this is my house Julianna…”

“Until the divorce gets finalized…” her mother adds as she rolls her eyes.

“Now, we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to celebrate, right? After all, it’s a hell of a time when my daughter becomes a world champion. I knew you could do it, Jules! I always knew!”

Julianna bites her lower lip, clearly holding back her anger at this point.

“From the day that I started training you, I always believed that you would be able to carry on my legacy and do some amazing things with it. I know things got rough for a few years and everything, but you managed to pull through the obstacles to become a world champion. I’m proud of you, Jules! You finally proved your worth in professional wrestling.”

Julianna narrows her eyes in that “you’re so full of shit” type of manner.

“I say we celebrate the greatest daughter I will ever have!”

“I thought that I was no daughter of yours…” Julianna says with anger in her voice, reminding him of all the abuse that he put her through. “You never believed in me. You were always the first person to run me down whenever I did something wrong in your eyes. If you weren’t abusing me over losing a match, you were mocking me for it and laughing at me for being ‘a failure’. This title proves that I am not a failure! So now that I have become a world champion, you want to sweep it all under the rug and act like you always had faith in me when you never did?”

“Well… you know I didn’t MEAN any of what I said…” her father says nervously.

“You’re so full of CRAP… you LIAR. You’ve got to be the biggest bandwagon son of a bitch I’ve ever known in my life! You don’t deserve to celebrate this with me. In fact, you don’t even deserve to be my father. I’m DONE with this. I don’t EVER want to talk to you again. I don’t EVER want to see you again. You’re nothing but toxic poison to me, ‘father’. And to be honest? The sooner you fucking DIE the better…”

Julianna walks up to her father, spits in his face, and then brushes by him leaving both of her parents in a state of shock. At this point, Julianna decides that it’s best to leave the scene before she gets triggered by her father’s presence any further.

As it turns out, this would be the final time she would ever see her father alive.

And she’s not regretting it on the flight to his home country….

July 12, 2023

“I never needed him to be a success in this business….” Julianna reminds herself in her thoughts. “And really? I shouldn’t give him another thought. I shouldn’t give him that kind of power. I admit that I was HAPPY when he died… and I know that’s a horrible thought… but he’s one of the few people on this planet that deserve that. It was awkward going to his funeral… but it was the only way I could know for sure that he truly was dead and that I never had to worry about that monster again. So you know what? I am NOT going to give him ANY sort of power.

Italy… honestly?

I’m going to just treat it as any other country… even if I am proud of the half of my roots that IS Italian through his side of my family. Maybe my mother is right… I should start to live and let go a little bit and not be bothered so much by his memory. In fact, I think I should do this…”

Julianna pulls out her phone again and is quick to access her voicemail. She grabs a small bottle of wine next to her and she pours it into a nearby glass that a flight attendant had brought earlier in the flight.

“....I should take whatever remnants of whatever shadow he still casts over me…”

Julianna checks off all of the old voicemails he had left her over the years.

“...and just… destroy them…”

Julianna presses the “DELETE” button and smiles when they disappear from her phone… and hopefully her memory.

“To a new future in Sin City Wrestling and beyond… whatever that may bring….”

She takes her glass of wine and drinks it, taking a deep breath and letting go as much of that old pain and anger related to her father as she possibly can. She puts down her glass and doesn’t even think of her father for the remainder of her flight to Italy.

All she’s thinking about now is making a successful debut in the company in a country that, in some ways, is a fitting, roundabout homecoming debut for her.

July 14, 2023

Julianna finds herself in the ruins of Ostia Antica, a former city in Ancient Rome about 30 kilometers from Rome itself. She sits in front of her camera on what appears to be some steps and she’s got much on her mind on this night:

Making a hell of a first impression in her Sin City Wrestling debut…

OBVIOUSLY getting a huge win right out of the gate…

And showing that she is here for the long haul and is about to truly shake things up.

Her determined, yet confident, glare is very prevalent in her eyes as she begins to express her thoughts about her Sin City Wrestling career for the first time.

“For those of you that know who I am… then you know. Besides that, let’s just get the intro part out of the way. Julianna DiMaria, new Sin City Wrestling Bombshell division participant. I’ve been around the world. I’ve done a few things. I’ve got a couple of world championships to my name. Is there anything else that you might want to know? Right, if you know who I am, then you may have heard terms toward me that aren’t so nice. These are terms that are included, but not limited to: bitch, cunt… yes, I’ve been called that word… cancer, drama queen, the whole nine yards. Yeah, I know I have a reputation that isn’t necessarily the greatest and the reason for that is that I speak my mind and I don’t sugar coat shit. I’m not going to be the wrestler that gives you a pat on the back and praises you for every single good thing that you do because UGH, to HELL with that puppies and rainbows shit… or I suppose in THIS case… there’s a HUGE emphasis on PUPPIES…”

Julianna rolls her eyes before she continues.

“But there’s no way in hell that I am going to come into this company and lose in my first match. That’s not going to happen. Now, before I dive into my opponent, I will admit that I’ve had my eye on this company on and off for a couple of years. In fact, there was even a point where I was tempted to come here and even came SO CLOSE… but there was one thing that REALLY pushed me away until recently: Same Old Shit Syndrome.

This division, in recent times…. Until recently, was old, plodding, boring, lacking initiative. I saw the same old names on top. I saw how this division seemed to always revolve around the never ending Roxi Johnson soap opera for example and it was just… .UGH… I swear, I felt like I was looking at a division that had peaked in its potential because for god’s sake, you have people like her, like Jessie Salco, and Mercedes Vargas, and the like that just didn’t want to let go even though it was obvious that the division had passed them by. I had to watch these lame, PUTRID attempts at a comeback from others that didn’t want to let go… you know… your Hiltons… your Bobbie Dahls, your Sam Marlowes and all of that. I mean for fuck’s sake, it looked as though the Sin City Wrestling Bombshells division had become a fucked up, 21st century version of Golden Girls!

And no thank you, I will NEVER be your fucking friend, BITCHES… so for those of you kn the Bombshells division that are hanging on for too long, you better step the fuck off… because if you don’t? I’ll MAKE YOU step the fuck off because I don’t give a FUCK about the tradition of this division. I don’t give a shit about those that paved the way. Don’t talk to me about Misty, or Roxi, or Amy Marshall or Seleana Zdunich or anyone else that just isn’t relevant anymore. So why am I here NOW in spite of all that I just said?

Because I see this division NOW.., and I’m seeing that there is a breath of fresh air.

And she can put the feather in her cap for all I care, but the moment Courtney Pierce won that title and FINALLY ended the never ending Roxi Johnson Saga, I saw HOPE that this division was FINALLY capable of evolving… so here I am and trust me, I’m not here to make friends. I have made few in my career as it is to begin with. I’m here to shake shit up and well… I suppose they threw me right into the fire with a Blast from the Past finalist…

Man, talk about a step down from recent finalists like Mikah and Myra Rivers, right?

I’m talking… of course… about YOU, Dawn Warren. And good lord, one look through your Twitter feed and I already know you are BLOODY ANNOYING! Holy crap, you freak out over every single little thing, you’re going on and on about your stupid wedding, you’re…. UGH! Girls like you that try to act all cute and hyper and all of that nonsense, they’ve always made me sick and I don’t think you are going to be an exception to that rule. You see Dawn, we do have ONE familiar similarity and that’s the fact that we DO have a family background. My parents themselves, both of them, were professional wrestlers before I was born. They trained me. They mentored me through the early part of my career, through the Indies, and all of that. But see, there’s one HUGE difference between me and you when it comes to family ties…

YOU SWEAR by them to the point where it’s dragging you down and I… well… I hit a point years ago where I said ‘fuck my parents and how they tried to train me, I’m doing this MY way’.

You on the other hand, you’re CRYING in your promos about how you are bringing HONOR to the Warren name! I hate to break the news to you honey, but that name is so tainted that such a feat is impossible. Now, I’m not going to be like most of your opponents and say that you’re awful because you’re related to Teddy or that you’re stupid because of Kate, Diamond, whatever her name is on Tuesday. Nah, let’s just say that you’re someone that isn’t destined for the greatness that I have always been destined for because… well… let’s face it. You’re OKAY… maybe even a little above average… but someone that is going to be winning world championships and becoming a big name? NAH! Not as long as you’re fighting for the honor of your family name. My advice? FUCK IT! Just be YOU… don’t WORRY about the family crap. I stopped… and look at me! I became a success story. I stopped wanting to be my parents and look where it got me.

You? All it gets you is being the new bridesmaid of the Bombshells division… always second best… always being that so close, yet so far bitch. Don’t believe me? Let’s talk about your record lately. Let’s talk about how at Summer XXXtreme, you had a chance to be the Bombshells Internet Champion and you completely fucking blew it. I mean girl, what in the HELL happened? Kayla Richards didn’t even break that much of a sweat with you. Here you are, just coming off of a hell of a Blast from the Past run… actually… never mind… that run wasn’t even THAT impressive and I’ll explain why in a bit… you have an opportunity that you were clearly in over your head for… and you get routed off the ship so much so that you were so fortunate that you didn’t fall overboard into the damn ocean.

Way to bring HONOR to your FAMILY, right, Dawn?

I mean, I can’t necessarily BLAME YOU for losing to Kayla Richards. I happen to know a thing or two about her but that’s a story for another day if I ever need to tell it. But for you to be EXPOSED the way you were? You know… as a FRAUD when it comes to where you THINK you are on the Bombshells ladder only to discover that you’re NOT as high as you think you are? No… THINK ABOUT IT REALLY… YOU… the Blast from the Past finalist… in the opening match against me. I mean, I’m in the opening match because I’m the new girl, I totally get that. But YOU?

You should be, at the very least, trying to beat Jessie for the Roulette Championship and yet, you’re the first one out of the curtain against the new girl… and not just ANY new girl, by the way. Between us girls… the way Kayla Richards beat the shit out of you at Summer XXXtreme proved one thing about your entire Blast from the Past run…

Calvin Harris literally carried your ass the whole time! Yeah, I’m straight up saying that, Scrappy DOLT.. You shouldn’t have even BEEN in the final to begin with but you just HAPPENED to have a horseshoe jammed up your ass when you had a former, and eventual, champion in Calvin Harris drawn to be your partner. You were even more fortunate when you consider how you even GOT to the finals to begin with. Like, I’m supposed to be impressed with your tournament run when not only did Calvin get the pin in the first round of that tournament, you didn’t even have THAT strong of competition in Melissa to begin with?> Yeah, I know she was Internet Champion at the time, but even with the title, she was showing signs of decline that you SHOULD’VE capitalized on to win that title that night… but didn’t. I’m supposed to be impressed by THAT? Or hell, I’m supposed to be impressed by your run in that tournament when you got by round two with a FLUKE?

Let me just say what EVERYONE else is thinking about you Dawn: if Goth wasn’t injured, he and Kim Pain would’ve ran you both out of the tournament. PERIOD! But hey, it’s on to the semifinals… and you DO get a pin…

…over an OVER THE HILL Bobbie Dahl on one of the seven millionth failed Bombshell Comeback tours this company has had in its decade plus history… who has never even BEEN a champion in her Sin City Wrestling career.

WOW… IMPRESSED… NOT….

Holy fucking hell, it was like Ruby Steele a few tournaments ago all over again. You should know that story. She won that tournament off of the back of Mark Cross who was a reigning tournament winner who wasn’t even her original partner… and you ALMOST did the same thing she did… except… you DIDN’T.

J2H and Devona exposed you just as much as Kayla Richards did. The clock finally struck midnight and you finally shat that glass slipper you had up your ass for the entire tournament. Tell me again why I should be impressed by the Blast from the Past tournament run that you had when you were very fortunate to have a partner that carried you to the near finish line to begin with, when you were facing Bombshells that were either past it or off their fucking game completely and when you even got by an opponent that would’ve beaten you had their partner not been injured.

Anyone?

Because to me, you’re a Blast from the Past finalist in accomplishment only. With any other partner, or even just a better opponent in ANY of the rounds that you actually wrestled in, you don’t even sniff your fucking Scooby Snacks let alone the finals. You know what the ironic thing is though, Dawn? I doubt this is news to you. I mean… on top of all the crying and whining about bringing honor to the Warren name… even YOU seem to know that you’re not what you want to be! LORD, where the fuck were your tissues when you were talking about your match with Krystal Wolfe?

“WAH… I feel emptiness in my life because my career isn’t where it wants to be… oh NOEZ… I feel like I let Calvin down… WOE IS ME, I let myself down… OH DEAR… I’m SO STUPID… WAH… I’ve CRIED SO MUCH since I got pinned by Devona… HELP ME GOD, I’m EMO because I am beating myself up because someone far superior to me kicked my ass and I can’t get over it and I’m so broken and I’m so SAD and PUPPY POWER is DEAD… WAAAAAH!”

UGH! Get the FUCK off that Kim Kardashian shit, Dawn! It sure as hell explains why Kayla nearly ran you off the god damn ship… I mean… you had ZERO confidence in yourself going into that match and you STILL have ZERO confidence…. You lack so much confidence in yourself that instead of focusing on this match, it seems like all you want to focus on is your stupid wedding and a birthday that nobody but you and a bunch of silly morons even give a fuck about. You have clearly shown during all of that sulking that you did in that promo that you don’t even know who the fuck you want to be in this business. I know who I am. That’s another advantage for me over someone like you. I’m making things happen all around the world, knowing who I am, knowing who I should be, knowing that I should take no prisoners and give no fucks about anyone else’s feelings, and you?

Girl, you’re an identity crisis on fucking steroids! I KNOW that you don’t know who you want to be… because there you are thinking that switching mentors is the answer to your problems. Hey, what a fine fucking way to be grateful to Seleana Zdunich right? You think Kim Pain is going to help you get to where you want to be? Spoiler, she won’t… and it’s not because of her, it’s because of YOU! What? The next time something doesn’t go her way, you’re going to abandon her and find another mentor? Is that how this is going to work? You’re just going to keep throwing things against the wall just to see what sticks? I mean… regarding your mentorship situation, there are TWO things wrong with that: one… the fact that you even HAD Seleana as a mentor to begin with… talk about the blind leading the fucking blind, huh? And two? The very concept of even HAVING a mentor. I learned that the hard way because my parents?

They were my mentors at first.

And as mentors? They honestly failed me, Dawn. The first couple of years of my mainstream career, I was just like you. I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t even know who I wanted to be. I had that identity crisis. I had those mental breakdowns that you’ve been having since the Blast from the Past tournament. I’ve done the stupid things that you are doing and I’ve changed things on a whim hoping that it would be the instant cure to my problems. In fact, as much as I hate to admit it? About four to five years ago, I pretty much WAS you… right down to the confidence issues that you have now. So yeah, beating a DOG like yourself? I pretty much know how to do that.

Trivia question about me though…

Have I had mentors in this business since my parents?

No.

And will you look at that… I’ve been WAY more successful WITHOUT a mentor than I could ever be with one and that’s why I think that having or even needing a mentor is a bunch of baloney and mediocre bullshit. Having a mentor, as you do Dawn, is a sign of weakness to me because to me, it tells me that you’re incapable of doing something on your own. I think even deep down, even you know that because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t be abandoning Seleana as a mentor and admitting that she couldn’t take you to the levels that you want to get to. It’s okay to have dreams Dawn, don’t get me wrong on that… but that’s why they call them dreams stupid… because dreams? They’re imaginary. Dreams are also for mediocre people such as yourself that lack a true initiative to get to where they want to be because the key to success in this business isn’t having DREAMS… it’s about having a GOAL and fucking getting after it and having the killer instinct to make it happen and THAT is why I have been able to do that for much of my career as a two time world champion in my own right and that’s why I am going to do it again in my Sin City Wrestling career starting with you.

I am a GOAL SETTER… I am a GOAL MAKER… I am not a FUCKING DREAMER!

A DREAM is a goal without a plan… so yeah… keep fucking dreaming Dawn, because you’re only ever going to be as successful as you want to be in your own fucking dreams.

Me? I’m a DOER! I go out and I make shit happen and I don’t care what I have to do in order to make it happen, I WILL make it happen… even if that means forsaking my parents and everything they ever taught me as I had done before… even if that means hurting someone’s feelings… or hurting someone in GENERAL… to the point where they realize they’re not cut out for this business and decide to quit.

Now, I’m not saying you’re going to quit when I’m done with you this Sunday.

But after this Sunday, I’m going to make you realize… as the dog you really are… where your true place on the Bombshells ladder is….

I’m living proof that being above family ties is what makes you successful here… that breaking the mold and that being a DOER who relies on her own means… is how you get it done…

And on Sunday? When I DO get it done? This division is going to get a taste of why I truly have been, and will be in SCW… THE… head of the class!!!

Julianna delivers a scoff, showing her arrogance and showing how little she cares for Dawn’s, or anyone else’s, feelings. She then walks up to the camera and shuts it off before taking in the ruins of Ostia Antica just a little bit longer.

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