Endeavor XLIV
Blog: Almighty Firesemana del 7 al 14 de agosto de 2022 Before I begin, shout out to Crystal Zdunich on an amazing eight-year career in Sin City Wrestling. Crystal got fired this past Sunday on Climax Control to the surprise, shock, and utter horror of only three of her fans but this was pretty much an easy decision made by the top brass, and I can’t say I blame them. That’s not to say that Crystal hasn’t earned everything she’s accomplished in those eight years - and she’s been a lightning rod of controversy for most of it - but whatever people may say about her, there’s no doubt in my mind that she’s earned her status as a Hall of Famer and a bonafide legend in the six-sided ring.
Crystal being fired is the real world equivalent of Donald Trump no longer being President. You knew it was coming, you just didn’t know when.
Our long national nightmare is over.
A lot of you are probably saying, “well damn, Mercedes, how could you be saying that about Crystal when the two of you have traveled down the road together and have been fierce frienemies for over a decade? You two were even part of the same induction class in the SCW Hall of Fame!” Not to say that this point isn’t valid, but upon realizing that I just find it funny that the same person who inducted Crystal into the Hall of Fame is the same one who inducted her into another one - former SCW talent.
This is why it’s never a good idea to get on the bad side of Christian Underwood.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
Anyway, to business.
They say opportunity knocks only once, though I have my doubts about that because lately it seems like opportunity knocks all the time for some people in SCW. I’m not knocking it, no pun intended, I’m just wondering when some of that is going to fall off my table.
I guess my prayers were answered because such an opportunity is waiting for me this weekend. But it’s not just about getting an opportunity, it’s about seizing it. And I’m about to carpe diem in less than a week at Climax Control. I found out that next week I’ll be challenging for the Bombshell World Championship at the go-home show before Violent Conduct. Though if I don’t beat Seleana Zdunich this weekend, then my match becomes a triple threat - and I really don’t want Seleana of all people shoehorning her way into MY title match. This unintentionally highlights a problem. When would the official number one contender in any sport be facing someone who has already had three title matches this year and had zero wins? Not in boxing, not in MMA, and perhaps not even in pro wrestling. Seleana should be building herself up with credible wins, not just getting title matches on a whim.
Even if by some divine miracle Seleana gets past me this weekend, does anyone think she stands a chance winning the Bombshell Championship, let alone beating Roxi for it? Remember, she already failed once against Roxi for the title way back in April at Climax Control 329, and in the main event no less. She failed to beat Roxi during her third reign two years ago, which was also the main event of the night. Never mind the fact that Roxi owns Seleana in SCW anyway as she’s beaten her at every point of her career - singles, tag, and multiwoman.
So why does Seleana gets to have this opportunity, especially after coming off competing for a title just two weeks ago? You can’t tell me that my match with Masque de Lune wasn’t more impressive than Seleana’s predictable epic fail in the Bombshell Internet Championship battle royal or that she defeated her estranged wife at Summer XXXTreme. I mean, seriously? It’s not fair, it’s not right, and I deserve better than this.
Seleana has found herself in a situation where she is simply at the right place, at the right place at the right time. And I can't really fault her for what she did. Maybe Christian Underwood calls it initiative. Well, I'm sure there would have been several Bombshells who would have jumped at the chance for a handout like Seleana is getting, but me? I'm not one of those people. Because I take pride in knowing that there isn't a single soul on this roster that can take me out. Many have tried, none has succeeded. I take pride in knowing that I've earned everything I've worked for not just in my career, but in this company.
So yeah, Seleana is the right girl, at the right place, at the right time. And this happens to be my Groundhog’s Day moment. I already faced Seleana three times this year alone, and I’m just about sick of this and sick of her. I’m almost sure that Seleana is going to have extra motivation this weekend following Crystal getting fired - or maybe she’ll be the complicit mail order bride she’s been known for since they got married. I know she’s hurting, I know she’s bitter, angry, and miserable, and I don't blame her one bit.
Honestly, I really don’t care.
This is going to be a bad week – for Seleana. And if I were her, and I'm sooooooo glad I'm NOT, I would forfeit the match, I wouldn't even show up. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't even BE in the same city we'll be in this weekend. But if she does, if Seleana does show up, if her music hits and she walks down that ramp and she enters that six-sided ring, I promise you, I swear to you, that it will not be a pleasant experience.
I hope Seleana knows what’s coming to her. Whether she likes me or hates me, she will respect me. And if she doesn't? Well, I'm going to have to beat the respect out of her. And when I kick her ass this weekend on Climax Control, you're all going to want to be tuning in.
I’ve got unfinished business in two weeks, and I prefer to have my alone time with Roxi Johnson. This is what I’ve been waiting for. It’s what I’ve worked for. This is what all the sacrifices are for. So Seleana can forget about another title match. For her to get to that, I'd have to move over.
And I'm gonna stand right here.~~~
So, it’s been three weeks now since the SCW overseas tour of India. For the most part, India has been been interesting, for the most part.
What else can I say, I’m a fish out of water, especially one who is still adjusting to the time difference. I’m still thinking it’s 9AM when it’s 6 pm.[Mercedes Vargas steps out the balcony of her hotel room, cup of coffee in hand, looking down at the city below.]
MERCEDES: Good morning, my neighbors!
NEIGHBOR: HEY! FUCK YOU!
MERCEDES: YES! YES! FUCK YOU TOO!
At least the neighbors are friendly, so there’s that.LATER…MUCH LATER
“Well, hello! How are you?”
“Well, I’m fine! How are you? And, might I add, who are you?”
[Mercedes is invited into an Indian family home. This was already getting awkward just from conversation from the man who she was talking to at the moment.]
Mercedes: Who am I?
Man: Am I supposed to know?
[Mercedes’ expression changes from happy to crestfallen in two seconds flat.]
Mercedes: I’m Mercedes Vargas. You know, international extraordinaire, multiple-time champion. Most talented wrestler in Sin City Wrestling?”
[Even Mercedes efforts of jogging the man’s memory proved fruitless. The man and his family nod their head.]
Man: Sin City Wrestling. I’ve heard about that company. Very good wrestlers.
Mercedes: What’s this?
[The man takes out an open notepad and hand it to Mercedes, whose face lights up.]
Mercedes: You want my autograph? Sure, no problem. Most people know that I am must-see TV. You are lucky that I took time out of my busy schedule to do this.
Man: Um...I don't even watch your matches.
«Mercedes nearly dropped the pen out of her hand.»
Mercedes: Now, why don't you want my autograph?
Woman: Because you’re mean, and treat everyone like dirt. That’s not positive behavior for my children.
Mercedes: Now where did you hear that?
Woman: Candy.
Yeah, that was my second guess. Of course it would be Candy. Poisoning the minds of children since 2019, even in reruns. This is exactly how rumors get started. Now this family will never shut up about it! Looks like I’ll have to do some damage control. Damn you, Candy!Mercedes: Oh, that's just a silly rumor. This was someone's idea of making me look bad, that my name is being dragged through the mud, that they're trying to ruin my reputation. I'm a human being, damn it! My name has value!
Little girl: What does 'rumor' mean?
Mercedes: Don't you learn anything?
Man: She’s home-schooled.
[Mercedes' face contorts briefly in a show of mock sympathy.]
Mercedes: My condolences.
Little Girl: Do you know Candy?
Mercedes: Know her? I’m her sister. Why do you ask?
Woman: Really? I didn’t know she had a sister. Could you get me Candy’s autograph after the show? It's the only one I don't have of the Bombshells who matter.
[Mercedes pretends to concentrate on her crossword, though she is truly hurt by this.]
Mercedes: Trust me, you don't want an autograph from Candy. Her and kids don't go well together.
Oh, if only they knew. If only they knew of the horror stories and what Candy does to those poor, innocent souls, they would be scarred for life. I bet those kids were, too. There’s only so much glitter a person can take. The little girl really should ask for another Bombshell’s autograph. Candy makes Twisted Sister look like Joan of Arc by comparison.
Woman: What about Seleana Zdunich? She says you’re the worst person ever.
Mercedes: You're going to believe her over me? That’s not fair. Just because someone's said something about you doesn't mean it's true. Besides, they've got nothing better to do than sullen my good name. You know what? No autograph for you!
[The man asked Mercedes to take a picture and then introduces her to his whole family. To say that being invited to an Indian family wasn’t one of the more special experiences in India would be an understatement. Mercedes was glad to check this moment off her to-do list.
~~~
Present Day ♦ K O L K A T A, I N D I A[REC•] [Here in Brahmapur, a neighborhood in Garia, Kolkata, we find Mercedes Vargas sat on a curb. Walls covered in interesting abstract art are on either side of her.]
“Not sure what’s melting down faster. Our glaciers due to global warming or Todd Williams the morning after he realized his ex-wife got fired and that he’s royally fucked now that Christian Underwood can do with him as he damn well please because he’s under contract.
“At least somebody is standing up for Crystal in her time of need. Now, look, I’m not a therapist, or play one on TV, but for someone who is supposedly married, don’t you think Crystal’s moral support should come from her current spouse instead of someone who used to be part of her life? Whatever happened to in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer? Crystal is no longer the breadwinner in her household, so it’s up to Seleana to hold down the fort, and I don’t think she’s even capable of doing that.”
[An unapologetic shake of her head follows.
With the shocking news of Crystal’s dismissal from the company, maybe the situation could have been handled better, but the Mercedes still believed that this cautionary tale was the shot in the arm the division sorely needed.]
“As far as her SCW career goes, I am not here to take anything away from Seleana. The Cat isn’t just a nickname, this is a woman who has scratched and clawed her way to a somewhat respectable place in the Bombshells Division. Not a bonafide star, but just above the gatekeepers like Jessie Salco. She is a proud former Bombshell World Champion…. who fluked her way to victory no thanks in part to Crystal costing Alicia Lukas the title. Seleana is also a former Bombshell Roulette Champion, just holding that title for over three months, but only got the title match in the first place thanks to Crystal using her Queen for a Day matchmaking powers. Seleana has won two championships and has just north of 30 wins in her career, though she’s been with SCW for four years. Know where I was after my first four years in?”
[Mercedes begins counting on her fingers while still keeping her gaze at the camera.]
“A Bombshell Triple Crown and Grand Slam champion, an overall nine-time title holder, exactly 40 wins to my name, a two-time Bombshell World Champion, and the first-ever Queen for a Day.
“Do you see where this is going? As good as Seleana is, she always leaves you wanting something more, always leaves that door open for someone to be that much better than her.
I’m not just that damn good, I’m not just better, I’m simply the best. At the age of 42, I’m at the latter end of my career. That isn’t lost on me. But if age is just a number, I must be magnificent. I’m a two-time Hall of Famer, the most decorated talent in the entire company, and still the only Bombshell to win every championship available in the division, including the World Mixed Tag Team Championship. I continue to win championships, break records, set milestones, and add to my legacy. I’m one of the greatest that this company has to offer, and it doesn’t matter where I am on any card, for any championship, at any time. Why? Because I’m the One-Woman Dynasty of Sin City Wrestling - there is no substitute or comparison.”
[Mercedes smiles at the camera, sliding her sunglasses over her head.]
“This Sunday, Seleana, you and I will be seeing each other once again, if only for someone else’s amusement. But that makes only one of us because when I saw the card for this weekend and found out about this match, I was not amused, more like disgusted. Still am. Probably won’t change before, during, or after our match Sunday either.
“It’s been three years since you last held the Bombshell Championship, you’ve been chasing that title for the past three years since you lost it - and you won a grand total of never. Five opportunities in three years, Seleana. I’m willing to bet when you heard about this match you ran and told all your friends, so I know how much this match means to you. Except, you know how they say that if you follow your dreams you’ll succeed? Don’t ever follow that advice because sometimes when you wake up, Mercedes Vargas is your reality.
“Do you remember what happened last time we faced each other, Seleana? I sure do. You were calling for the Kattoga, the Asai DDT, to end the match. But in an instant, by some cruel twist of fate, you ended up getting dropped on your head with the Black. Rose. Overdrive. And on Sunday, it’s going to end the same exact way that it ended nearly two months ago in Tucson, Arizona.
“What you need to realize is that when Crystal got fired last Sunday, it was her own fault why she’s now out of a job. Crazy people do things to tempt fate while stupid people do things that seal their fate. And now that your wife is gone from SCW, and hopefully gone for good, Christian isn’t going to stop there. He’s not only going to make her Todd’s life a living hell, oh no.”
[Mercedes lifts her hand and wags her index finger accompanied with a devious little smile.]
“He’s going to make your life one too. He did it once before.”
[It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Pretty sure that moment in time was a repressed memory Seleana would not want to revisit. Christian Underwood was notorious for getting revenge on anyone who dared crossed him, real or imagined. Mercedes almost felt sorry for what was about to happen to Seleana. Almost.]
“And if there is anyone who is bona fide, certified, and qualified to be the first one to send you on your way to joining Crystal in unemployment, Christian found the right one. I’ll be more than happy to do just that. And this time, Seleana, I’ll be crossing off your name for the last time.”
[Mercedes reaches over for her checklist and slowly, methodically, takes a red Sharpie and draws a line through Seleana’s name.]
"Estar preparado para lo peor, esperar lo mejor."
"Prepare for the worst, hope for the best."[Mercedes fluffs and straightens out her hair and then slowly cross her arms. She pauses for effect, lowering her voice just above a whisper.]
"Y que la suerte está siempre en su favor.”
“And may the odds be ever in your favor."***Fade***
