I knew he was right, everything he was saying was right. I felt like I had a split second of amnesia because now everything is rushing back to my mind like it had never left.
Despayre, a beautiful child. I felt bad for what he is going through, he grew up having to experience such terrible things, kind of what I went through. I guess you could say our stories are similar, but then it wasn't.
Sean: I panicked, I have the right to do that. But you really don't know the full extent of what is going on in my life at this moment, and my career.
Synn tries to talk, but Sean holds his hand up.
Sean: Listen to me first, I don't ever mean to disrespect you or make you feel like your not wanted or even give you the impression that I don't appreciate the things you do for me, or the advice you give me. But I am dealing with a lot of this on my own, and its not only my issues, but its issues dealing with other family also.
Sean sighs as he takes a sip of water from his water bottle.
Sean: I've made some terrible choices and right now in my life everything that I thought I had got away with is finally catching up on me, why do you think I haven't fully committed to you yet? Huh ?
Its true, Synn would be the perfect match, good man, financially stable, he has goals and has accomplished a lot but I couldn't bring the misery of my life into his, I really want to fix my problems and not create more of a headache for him.
Sean: I have things I need to take care of Synn, and you know this already. I'm not high, I'm just drunk, I'm not doing hardcore drugs, I'm just stressed and I went back to the way I knew how to deal with my problems and that's drinking, am I a full blown alcoholic? No I am not, but I have had a few shares of drinks today.
Sean turns his head and stares over at Despayre, his eyes begin to water a little, but he quickly wipes tears developing away from his eyes, he turns and looks back at Synn.
Sean: I've always been grateful to have you in my life, just know that. And I apologize for how I reacted, and to set the record straight I did not whore myself for $2,500. I am worth a lot more then that, but I did meet up with an old friend who is a multi-millionaire, he owns a home in the Hamptons and he basically helped me with some cash some time ago and the only thing he wanted in return was my time, nothing sexual Synn, I do have more respect for my body then what you think I do.
It was strange to hear Synn open up to me so much, there were some things Synn has told me about his past, and there are some things he hasn't, but I knew something huge had to happen in his life to make him so strong, so blunt, so mature and have such a hard back bone.
Synn was the type of person who would give a arm to help, but he also was the type of person that would not allow anyone to step over his boundaries or to walk all over him, and I admit he did a really good job of helping me, so I knew he cared.
Sean: You never really opened up to me about your past Synn, [Pauses] I never knew you went through some of that stuff.
Sean reaches out his hand and grabs a hold of Synn, with his thumb he rubs his finger across Synn's palm.
Sean: I know I don't tell you this to much Synn, but I really do care for you and as much as I should say it, I don't. But that will all - [Sean pulls his hand back and quickly covers his mouth]
Please don't throw up Sean, please ... please ..
Sean waits a couple seconds, but then drops his hand from his mouth, he lets out a small belch and looks back up at Synn.
Sean: I'm not feeling to well at this moment, so I apologize. I drank way to much earlier, and I just left the gym about an hour ago, right before I stopped here, thats where I was coming from .. but that's not important, what's important is Synn, I really do LO -
Before Sean could finish, his mouth widens and vomit races out his mouth and onto the floor, while throwing up, Sean reaches over and grabs napkins on the table trying to prevent more from hitting the floor, after a couple more seconds go by, he stops, he drops to the floor trying to clean up.
Sean: THIS IS F*CKING EMBARRASSING !!
Sean throws each and every napkin in the trash, he turns and looks at Synn, a frown grows across his face.