(with any luck I will have the time to go back and format this...but just in case. Here we go)
Aleksei Koji stands in front of the door of his trailer. He is dressed to impress. A new top hat sitting atop his head at a jaunty angle and his patchwork coat on. Chanting and cheering can be heard outside through the thin door. Aleksei pulls out his flask, looking at it a moment.
“It is hard to remember what parts of the last week have been real, what has been a dream and what has belonged to the rum.”
The image in front of us starts to rewind. We see Aleksei walk backwards through his trailer that is in its normal state of chaos. Chairs are set up in the living room for the upcoming Party Horde Live episode and Aleksei moves pass them. He stumbles back into the bedroom and flops down in the bed. We focus on his eyes as they close.
When they open again Aleksei is sitting mostly upright. He is holding an icepack to his head. Dried blood can be seen down the right side of his face. Someone is wrapping up his arms and the Romanian has a more dazed look on his face then normal. He stares out with little to no expression on his face. They finish wrapping up his arm, putting away the previous bandages that were quite bloody. Jamie Staggs walks over to Aleksei.
Jamie Staggs: You okay man? Listen, I have to go to my match. Just let them take care of you bro and I will be back. I am going to win this thing for us.
Aleksei nods and watches Jamie leave. He then closes his eyes.
When they open again he is standing in a forest. It is an old forest filled with thick trees and tangly vines. Aside from his burnt top hat, Aleksei appears to be naked. A giant wolf comes out from the brush, its fur dark gray and its eyes a deep blue. The wolf speaks.
You must of gotten hit pretty hard in the head.
Aleksei looks at the wolf, and looks down at himself. Then he ask the wolf “Am I dreaming?”
What the fuck do you think?
Aleksei closes his eyes and shakes his head, trying to shake the dream away. When he wakes up again he is sitting on the hood of his camper. A massive party is going on around him. He sings a song in Romanian to himself and seems completely oblivious to the world around him. Jamie Staggs comes running up to him, he looks even more beat up then Aleksei.
Jamie: Quit your crazy speak man, I just read online. You have a match man! You and Frost are teaming up against that pussy Kenndy and that other guy. The new guy who thinks he is hot shit,..Barnes or something like that. Our first SCW match as Party Horde, this is going to be epic. I already have some great prank ideas.
Aleksei (slurring very badly as he speaks): Whoooo are you?
Jamie laughs at first thinking it is a joke then can tell that Aleksei is too far drunk to really process what is going on. He pats the man on the back looking mildly concerned.
Jamie: Lets find some peopleto get you in bed you big lug. You have had enough grown up drink for now.
Aleksei laughs and promptly falls off the hood. He is passed out on the dirt of what ever camper park the Horde has stopped at.
When he opens his eyes again Aleksei finds himself in a big open space. Its almost like a stage that seems to have no end. All is black except for the large spotlight that is on him. Ms. Rocky Mountains is there wearing only red lingerie. This is obviously a dream but at this point who knows if our Party Horde Hero can tell the difference.
Rocky Mountains: Thank you for coming onto the show. You just finished up the King of the Deathmatch tournament. A lot of people thought you were nothing more than a bumbling idiot but you didn’t do so bad. Any thoughts on that?
Aleksei: Ummm you’re not as nice as you normally are...thats a thought. Otherwise...I don’t know. I really thought I was going to win the whole thing, I mean I know a lot of people think I am a joke but I thought I had it. I would like to think I showed some of those people that I am a real fighter. That I am a force to be reckoned with but who knows. I can pretend I don’t care but I do. It fucking sucks the big one.
Rocky Mountains: Well mopey pants you have a match coming up this Sunday. Its another tag team match, you think you have any chance to win that one?
Aleksei: Da. Hell yes I think I can win this thing. I have the Horde behind me and that is huge. This thing is growing so fast I don’t know what to do with it. I can’t control it but I don’t need to. My fans want me to win and they will help make this happen. Not to mention I have Frost with me. Have you seen that guy in the ring? He is amazing. This is an even better team than me and Weapon X.
Sure I have had some losses as of late but I know I still have it. I am the Dire Wolf. I am a rougher brawler then either of those jokes and this time around I have back up. Frost will be in my corner, Jamie will be there too. The odds are in my favor and more importantly I fucking want this win. Hell I need it and I am going to have it.
Rocky Mountains: Even if you have been drunk for four days straight?
Aleksei: What...how did you know that?
Rocky Mountains: Would you like me to show you my boobs now?
Aleksei: I am pretty sure this can not be real in any way...but yes.
Rocky starts to reach behind her to unclasp her bra when we hear a familiar voice.
Karina: Wake up you stupid head!
Aleksei: Fuck no....don’t do this to me.
Rocky smiles and starts to fade away as bright light fills this strange dream space. When Aleksei opens his eyes we find that he is in bed. By the stubble on his face and shape of his outfit it appears that days have passed since he passed out. Karina is standing over him poking him with her black bat. Jamie is at the door watching this.
Karina: Morning sunshine.
Aleksei: No....no..fuck no. Anyone but you.
Aleksei forces his eyes close. Shuts them as tight as possible and tries to find the image of Rocky nearly naked in his mind. It doesn’t work. When he opens his eyes again he is dreaming. He is in a small boat in a lake of murky water. The boat has a hole in it and water is coming up. Jamie is in the boat with him dressed as a pirate, complete with big hat and eye patch.
Aleksei: What the fuck now? Why are you dressed as a pirate?
Jamie: Yarrrr, I don’t know bitch. I aint your therapist...but don’t worry. This stuff isn’t water...its rum baby!
Aleksei looks down and scoops up some of the water. He takes a sip and laughs. Then he looks up and sees a massive wave coming their way. He looks at Jamie who is screaming in terror. The two friends hug eachother.
Jamie: Never let go!
The wave crashes down, but of course it is not a wave. Its a bucket of water being dumped on Aleksei head by his little sister. He sputters and looks at her, his eyes focusing for the first time in days. He curses at her in Romanian for a good thirty seconds while she just grins. He then takes a breath.
Karina: You done?
Aleksei: For now....what the hell are you doing here?
Karina: I was nearby, I heard you were wallowing in booze. I thought about letting you drink yourself to death but Jamie has a cute butt, so I thought I would do him this favor.
Aleksei: Have I told you lately how much I love these family moments?
Karina: Awww how sweet? Now listen to me. You have a match in two days and you are a wreck. Not only that but someone thought it would be a good idea to give you another chance at the Roulette Title. If you were on your own then I wouldn’t care if you ruin things with your drinking, but you have started something. There is a caravan of people who are driving cross country to watch you fight. You are their lovable idiot and if you let them down, well then you become something much worse than a fool. So sober up and get ready for your fight.
Aleksei: So you are saying I have a chance of winning these matches?
Karina: Of course not. You suck....but your fans need you to give it your best. For some reason that matters to them. I think part of it, is that it can be quite fun to watch you get beat up. Or maybe because despite all your flaws.....you are kind of charming. I don’t care. Put in the effort or I will set your camper on fire.
Aleksei stares at his sister in disbelief. Jamie has a similar expression on his face. Karina hops off the bed and heads out of the room. She swats Jamie on the ass on her way out and heads for the door. Aleksei takes a deep breath and climbs out of bed. He closes his eyes....
and when he opens them again he is at his front door like in the beginning. It is Sunday night and Horde can be heard outside his camper door. For the first time they are putting on an epic tailgating party, complete with autographs, drink specials and a new episode of Party Horde Live. In a few hours Aleksei will step in the ring again. He is sober and ready. He might have even trained a little as his caravan headed west, but for now all he has to do is address the crowd.
When he opens the door he is met with a chorus of cheers and hollering. He waves to the massive gathering of fans. He waits for them to calm down but the crowd keeps building. The Dire Wolf is stunned. He holds up his hands to quiet them down.
Aleksei: What are you all doing here? I don’t owe you money right?....because if I owe you money I promise you Jamie is good for it.
The crowd laughs and Jamie curses as he makes his way through the crowd. When he reaches Aleksei he is all smiles though.
Aleksei: No...I don’t think this is about money. I think you guys came to see a fight. I think you came to see the Party Horde in action and I promise you. We will not disappoint. Not only do I promise you all we are going to get the win tonight, I promise we will do it with style. After the week I have had its not worth it just to beat the crap out of Kennedy or slam Mr. Barnes to the canvas. I am going to be extra brutal. I will hit that much harder. And with Lucian Frost on my side not only will it be brutal and epic, but its going to look amazing. I am going to wear those two jokers down and just let Frost do what he does best.
Now you might be asking how I think I can beat Primetime Kennedy this time around. I mean that little punk did put me through a table. Of course he also had his lumbering man thug with him and this time around I have back up. This is not the same Kennedy either. I watched him fight in the same bloody mess of a tourney that I was in. He looks tired. Not to mention his mind is going to be on other things, like wondering when that freight train of pain is going to come crashing into him.
And don’t get me started on Matt Barnes. He calls himself the “Bad boy of Wrestling” but what has he really done. When he even shows up for his matches he mostly prances around until he gets smashed by his opponent. I mean Lucian has already beaten him once and that was without a Horde of crazy, dedicated fans behind him. Because make no mistake Frost is honorary Party Horde tonight. I believe in this guy. I think he could take these two on his own if he had too, but just to make it a good show I am going to help him along the way.
Now you might be wondering if I am able to really fight hard after the beatings I suffered last week. I mean you might see the bruise on my face and the bandages on my arm, and wonder how I can pull this off....well I will tell you how. Its because of you freaks. This Party Horde thing gets bigger every day and as it gets bigger, I get stronger. I realize now this is not just about me. I am fighting for all of you...every punch I throw has the power of the Horde behind it. That means Kennedy and Barnes are not just fighting two of the most talented fighters in this business. They are fighting Jamie Staggs....they are fighting against each and every one of you. How can they hope to win against those odds? If they were both not so annoying I would almost feel sorry for them.
The crowd laughs again, one of many times they have done so during his speech. Jamie is smiling pretty big himself and Aleksei takes a moment to take in the energy of the crowd.
Aleksei: Now let's tap the kegs and get the grills going. We have a party to start!
Aleksei throws his arms up in victory and the crowd goes wild. He marches into the crowd ready to have a damn good time.
