Every corner in SCW seems shrouded in egotism. Like every competitor who signs a contract gets a nice twelve inch needle injected in their neck of 'Haterade'. I've seen a few rise up, they've shaken off the constant pressure of the overflowing hatred that spews from every noise box on the roster. And they've managed to stay true to themselves...People like me. I’ve tried to be the normal me. But I had to go to darker road for these people and now after defending my belt for so long…I yearn to do what others haven’t push this Division to the extreme.
There are men like my close friend Lord Raab or even Ryan Kidd... Like our SCW Heavyweight Champion, Drake Green. They seem like a breed all their own even more. I mean when I first got a glimpse of SCW, mostly thanks to Erik Staggs sending me footage... I knew things were like this. But seeing and living are two totally different beasts.
Just when I thought maybe it was a mistake to dust off my boots and get back in the ring, SCW gets me involved with this SCW Roulette title with I proudly defended at Violent Conduct III which two Sundays against ... Gabriel Asar, Ryan Kidd and Kris Halc. And just like that I'm hooked all over again. As time has passed, this 'war' with myself I've been battling has been consuming my vision... Kris Halc come Sunday you get your rematch for my title. But come Sunday you’ll know why I have defended this belt against some of the best.
Now considering my run as champion, I forgot to take into account some other peoples perspectives of me, not because I didn't care. Only because I simply figured they had their own paths to transverse. But now those so-called paths sure are crossed, and the intersection looks to be more of a no-man's collision course. I guess you could say that I've got about 99 problems and finally... a bitch ain't one!
Scratch that... depending on who walks out winner of our match Kris, you’ll be that problem with all due respect. See you Sunday, Kris.
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- Wednesday - 10.03.2014 -
- Undisclosed Location -
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You won't let him off the hook again, Equinox. My faith in the skills remains, and I know you can take this title match! I wouldn't have taken the shit storm I did in the meetings over it otherwise.
I nod at my best friend, he gives me a slight smile knowing I understand his stance. I dig into a cooler along one of the benches on the floor and pull out an ice pack, pressing it over my neck as I exhale in relief. This person has been helping me train all afternoon inside the old gym Justin converted for his venture into “wrestling†schools'. Now-a-days it's a simply run down old gym with a dusty ring, complete with sagged ropes and turnbuckles that appear to have been gnawed on by a giant cat. The place still works well for solace and off the grid training... Which is exactly what I've wanted.
So damn cold ice, but feels the best after I get my neck all acting up...
It's really been bothering you these past few weeks, huh?
I chuckle softly, smiling actually. Even though my neck is a throbbing mess, how could I have just expected This person to be right in my train of thoughts? I sit down on the bench as the undisclosed figure does the same, I shake my head a bit still wearing a grin.
My Swanton called the dark kingdom, it hurts enough when ya actually land it on someone... When ya miss it feels like ya basically fell out of a tree or hit by a truck! And the more I do it, more I risk it each time I go out there... the more I wonder if my boys will grow up with their dad in a chair. Ya know?
This person laughs as I say this, slapping his right hand upside my left shoulder with some force. I smile myself, trying to just let go of my worries. I can't dwell on them. Time to either keep going, or step the fuck down... And I refuse to step off AT all. I know this inconclusive finish from the tag match on Trauma has lingered between us all week, but either of us have mentioned it, hell it has only opened a whole new can of worms. I must have drifted off in thought and looked dazed because I feel this person grab my arm and shake it a bit. I snap my eyes back onto him as he looks concerned now a bit.
You okay Equinox? You could be concussed. You and Hart took quite a fall off that stage! If you weren't 100% you'd tell me right? I mean we're brothers, but I would never want to intently place you in a bad position.
I feel my back straighten up a bit now, I almost feel proud to say this... and that's sad. But for a change I'm not a complete wreck inside over her.
My neck is in a lot of pain, but I don't feel dizzy or nothing. Just like I got blindsided by Jimmy Ringo last week and my neck is tight. Hell nothing a good massage won't fix! I will be fine my man, I mean this is part of the whole 30 plus part of life right?
This person grins ear to ear, he nods a few times as he slowly gets to his feet.
That's the damn truth.
We share a brief laugh, I toss the ice pack aside and get up before I head to the sink. As I run cool water over my hands and then pat it upon my face, This person brings her up finally... I knew he would.
So it's over then? I mean with me and Alexis? She was the reason you've been so ultra angry, ain't she? I mean sometimes I'd listen to your promos for SCW and it'd be like a stranger talking... And look, before you say anything know I'm sorry if it's something I shouldn't have brought up.
I get the water off and reach around for a near-by towel, unable to find it I squint only to catch This person as he steps forward and grabs it up. He hands me the towel and I dry off my face, he's pretty good at staying positive in bad spots. This person always has been a glass half full kind of guy, I nod a few times and give him my best 'positive' smile.
So did you make that call, or she? I mean if you don't mind me asking? I just want you to be healthy, and ready to wage a freaking war out there! And you were there for me during some bad times in Chicago, I'd like to think I can return that friendship by being here for you now.
I toss the towel down and sniffle a bit as I clear my nostrils, my eyes narrowing slightly as I softly say...
There are no runner's up... Ya know that right?
Wait... what?
I grin now, thinking about my conversation with my now EX-fiancee Alexis Crayne. How I made the first steps in breaking it off before all this travel time, and distance took her from me against my own will. I thought about everyone else’s and their motor mouths... They wouldn't be shut until This person and I did it by force. I always twisted my own destiny... Forced fate in the direction I wished to fly... Why should this time be any different? I want that title. And I cannot let Kris win, nor H.S.I reacquire. The time for me being an afterthought, and consuming my focus with her was done.
Kris Halc and H.S.I, they WILL never settle for anything less than besting us. And tomorrow night, I send the ultimate insult at Kris... I'm going to break my fucking self to win this thing. I'm leaving with that Roulette title still mine... Or I may not be leaving at all!
Now that's the Equinox I remember! Damn bro, it has been far too long since I've heard you talking like this! I'm excited to see you go after it, and I know you can take it. Just do what you always do...
This person nudges me, I peer up as he folds his arms and gives me his 'matter of fact' type of look.
Thrill them all.
I raise my left brow with an uncontrollable smirk.
It's thrill time to thrill all...
He shakes his head and mutters something about 'knowing what he meant' before shooting a grin my direction. His cell phone then begins to go off as he pulls it out to peer over it, he holds up a finger as he 'takes' the call. I nod and drop back to a seat on the bench, my mind thinking about how much of a change I've been needing for so long now. Could I? Would I? Climax Control had to be all I focused upon for the next 24 hours...
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-REC- I sit on one of the recliners in my hotel room. My mind tracing off a zillion and four miles an hour as my eyes remain on the television set upon the entertainment center before me. Watching the triple cage match that Kris and I had been through not far back. A match that was wild, and fast paced... Houston knocked me right off the horse and fast. I cannot keep the thought about this being a moment of clarity for me, I feel a long frown bestow me.
Kris Halc, Equinox ...
I finally mutter out, our names. My mind already thinking about the words as they come out. I feel my head sway before I let my eyes trail from the television and move to my camcorder to my left upon a tripod.
A second time, this go round has a little more attached on it. I'm not some 'over-hyped' half talent coming in fresh off a long vacation even though I deserve it. And you're certainly looking to finally obtain my shiny piece of hardware, eh Kris.
Well considering this is my division your in for quite the surprise. I take my left hand and rub at my chin and mouth a bit before I softly speak again.
Let me cut through some of the useless yack, yack, and yack and put the cheese right on the plate. That work for you?
I feel myself almost motioning in question now.
WE took our match at Violent Conduct and made history, kudos to you for that! But I have prided myself for a career chuck full off correcting mistakes, improving failures. And I do NOT let many get over on me and Kris if you do happen to beat me I will get my rematch very soon. So consider our last meeting you're one get out jail free card with me! So now it's onto round two...
I shake my head, letting a long sigh escape.
This should be you and myself as well as the title between us. But we both know that ain’t happening so long as H.S.I runs rampent. So while I cannot stand them AT all... DO NOT think this means I like you any better. I respect the hell out of your ability kid. I am still reliving our three cage show down, still beating myself up over the mistakes I made that night of letting you get a head start. And this week is a retribution on the highest level for a guy such as me! I could retain a championship, but also prove I am the best roulette champion yet... Which I PLAN to DO!
It just comes out almost boldly, yet coldly. I get up from the recliner and crotch down a bit to get eye level with my camcorder. I feel a stern expression etch itself over me.
Since I came to SCW, they pushed my face all over their website, in their promotional material... they force fed the Suicidal Superman to EACH and EVERY one! And with good reason Kris, I'm not some hampered up old joke. I come as advertised, and sadly have been far too distracted to truly let go and BE MYSELF since I got here. This week I plan to make the changes... to right my OWN wrongs. But you give an inch, they take a mile... right? Any reason to burn me to ashes. You can claim respect, pretend to have it for me til you turn blue and suffocate Kris... But you happen to know I'm telling the truth when I say you have NONE, not for ME anyhow as I have for you.
I nod a few times.
The problem is I walk each and every single word I talk. I live and will someday die by my word. Is it a necessity? Hell no. It's an honor to fight you. And I call myself out when I fuck up, screw up... Don't get it right. I'm not too proud, or two BIG to admit I dropped the ball almost when we last met. And sadly I also know that it caused a rift in you, where you should be worried about me coming at you full speed as you’re trying to end my title reign this week... You are NOT. And you can lie, lie, lie all you damn well wish. But I know you've already pegged my threat a minimum. But it's NOT... it's a MAXIMUM!
Maybe that sounded arrogant, but it's not. I take such a pride in trying to fight to make my word have merit. I wanna know that when I look a man, woman or child in their eyes and say something that they know it's a lock.
Like this whole deal with Hot Stuff International... Forget that man. I never ask for anything of the sort! I simply want the chance to go out and have a good time. Fly around and get those fans heart rates pumping! We could trade insults for insult and be smocks like anyone. But it doesn't have to be that way kris, it just doesn't.
I nod once with a grin.
Things are wide open you see Kris, and a respectful battle is still there to be fought! We've got to keep proving this isn't just some clusterfuck of narcissistic bastards. Sure we've all got to have a little self esteem, and believe in our skills. But stand up tall with me, let's put on a thrill-a-thon! You... me... flying high. Hell maybe just maybe our match could be a match for next year’s awards.
I smile at that one.
But it's fine, if you'd rather conform and become another self server... That is your call. Just know that no-matter what anyone else around here has to say or does. Equinox remains true to his word. And I am not going to let anyone’s games derail my focus on getting back to business, back to thrill all of the fans. All of them! That feeling that consumed you the night. you almost the Roulette strap from me... That energy like you could take on anyone in that moment and win at all odds!?
I smile a little wider now.
I have felt that coursing through me a hundred times, I have. I haven't become 'renowned' like so many around here wanna plug me as without over coming odds. And I still plan to hold my hand out to shake yours Thursday... win, lose, or draw I'm only aiming to thrill the masses! And there is nothing personal between us, I respect that you almost won. I really do. Just like I plan to take this match on Climax Control, and hoping after all is said and done... We can walk away with a true respect between one another.
I can almost feel the same adrenaline as I scale something tall, their eyes are on me as they wait to see if I can make it... then I dive... Daydreaming about sailing at Kris with a Swanton creases another grin over me as I speak some more.
Yea I know... I'm a long winded three trick pony... But I cannot help my mind never ceases. It just rolls like an endless reel. But on with it... You may think that if you defeat me at Climax…it will somehow render things different... But it won't Kris. It'll just make me dig in a little deeper and come back at you a little harder the next time! I am NOT AFRAID to FAIL! If you never fail, never fall... never have to get back up and dust off to go at it again then you're just not trying hard enough... and ya ‘all got to learn that this Suicidal Superman always takes the path you'd least expect. We can do this like men, or boys Kris... Balls in your court my friend.
Sounds like enough for the masses, I turn my head slowly, letting my green eyes get in-sync with the camera's lens. My face remains rather unmoved, even if my insides are a turbulent storm of emotion.
Speaking on the subject of one's 'word' Jimmy yes I am talking to you, I know you're not the type to give two shits about the meaning of such a matter like respect and honor. But some of us do... Some of use it to build a reputation of trust, honor... And respect. If you get involved in my match I promise you a world of hurt.
I nearly hiss like a serpent as I say the last word, my face contorting beyond my control now with an angered glare.
You've been so busy barking about how you are back, and how nobody will stop... You've been shouting out about how great you are for so long now, I think you've forgotten the simple truth to our profession, Jimmy or the history you and I share…See Jimmy not to long ago you and I fought in a match to determine if I would get my shot at Brother Grimm and the belt you see before you. I won. I knocked your ass out and now your back and think you can just come in and attack me? I don’t think so.
I shake my head slowly, my eyes still locked on the lens.
Respect is not given out and nor is title shots, it's not a welcoming gift one receives when they walk through the front doors. I get that you're confident, and you feel your words are drowned in truth. But look around Jimmy, look at where we are man... SCW, the wrestlers that comprise this roster... They hardly give respect to anyone that hasn’t earned it and you haven’t by far. What makes you think they'd simply hand it over to you simply because you waltzed through the damn door and demanded it?
My energy swells now, I can almost hear Jimmy's voice. I can hear him boasting, proclaiming, and hammering on and on with his rhetoric. His God damned off the mark insults, such a waste... I twist my neck slightly until it cracks with a pop. I fold my arms and return my glare with the camcorder.
I came to SCW to fly high, and defy the odds... which have been mounting heavily over me. I am not going to let some self serving prick like you come between myself and my goals around here. This person and I call ourselves…Corrupt because we are already 'broken' from years in this business... and to be honest we won't demand, we'll TAKE... MAKE our OWN way. Guys like you are a painted little portrait of exactly what I'm talking about... You demand, demand, demand... Yet you can't just see it's easier to use all this talent you boast over to go out and TAKE it!
I bite at my lower lip as I pause for a moment. My face finally finds a bright grin, the thought of an Wayward Dissolution connecting with Jimmy's big mouth floods my thoughts. Did it make up for the last two weeks, no. But it was a good start, All I need to do is turn it to reality and get that title more reckonening... the perfect thing to shove in his arrogant face.
You talk like you are a God, but there is only one God and his name isn't Jimmy. You think you're special, and you've got the tools to stand alone a top SCW's mountain of success. And really that's all good and fine with me, you're entitled to your beliefs even if they are far sighted and deficient of any merit. Now I turn my attention back to the matter at hand.
My eyes trail back to the lens now.
I'm just looking to earn my stripes around SCW, and I'm proud of that. I wouldn't walk into here and demand anything... Only ask for the chance to earn it. Your ego seems to far exceed your footsteps, it enters the room with viciousness long before we even hear your voice. And now the directors have put us on a collision course for each other... Tag matches, inconclusive finishes... All this jazz is making it hard for one of us to simply shut the other up. This week one of us, if not Kris WILL have the upper hand in the argument. You CAN PROVE you're as damned good as you claim to be. And forgive me if my doubts remain strong.
I nod.
Maybe they're trying to get through to you, show you respect will be earned and never just given. Making us prove our place among the crowded ranks of SCW. But your going to find out just like Jimmy will, that this belt comes with hard work. It consumes you, it fuels you... It pushes you through each and every one of those disgusting words you spew, or actions you partake in. The question remains my friend will you respect me afterwards...
I sneer vividly now.
Which means only one thing... When Climax comes around, and the time has arrived for me to get my shot at you again. The last time we faced... the triple cage match... they won't be the only reasons, just extra gas on the fire... No your courage to face me again, the way you speak to everyone, the thing that makes you tick most will be what destroys you. You may not like getting kicked in the face like you're about to be Sunday night, but it doesn't matter. I treat people how they treat me... And I didn't get to where I am today without breaking egos along the way.
I shrug a bit as I stand upright now, my eyes narrowing as I close out.
You want to be respected like Jimmy wants to that’s fine, you want to prove you're better than me... Go time, Kris. This Sunday Night, let's just see how much of the fans can enjoy our match... for the better of SCW. Welcome to Wayward Dreams, Kris.
And on that I snatch the camcorder up and shut it off, I never edit these things. Just deliver em to the offices. I clutch the camcorder as I let my mind trail off a bit. I kept this simple, I was actually proud of myself for not letting the emotions run wild on camera. I feel a smile cross my face as I feel free again... finally. Not bitter... Jaded... Or unfocused... Just free. This isn't going to be fun by any measure of the term, but it's gotta be done. I already feel myself getting all hyper inside just thinking about the excitement in the arena each and every time one of the three of us makes a huge impact! Triple threats are insane, but this one will be deranged!.
