You know, its funny how life works. It all depends on what you set for yourself, people always blame their parents for how certain children are raised, or how they turn out when their grown. But the parents only have one job and that's to raise your kids until their old enough to take care of themselves, but unfournately for me I wasn't that lucky.
Location:
Las Vegas, Nevada
Club XO
Time - 1:45AM
The scene opens up downtown Vegas, streets are flooded with cars leaving and entering the downtown area, the scene shifts to CLUB XO, all you can hear is music blasting through the club speakers and people dancing and having a good time. Sean is shown wearing a pair of Black Skinny Jeans, and a Purple Dior shirt with some air foces on, he dances to " Dance (Ass). " By Big Sean and Nicki Minaj, in one hand he has his iPhone and in the other a drink.
It's been a long time since i've stepped foot in a night club, it really isn't my seen like it use to be. I remember when I was younger, I was in and out of the clubs, I'm pretty sure I've hit over 100 clubs in my whole life span. During my younger days, I use to be into the whole club promoting and partying and getting fucked up on a regular, now that I'm older it doesn't really affect me anymore, clubs are fine, but the drama inside of them is what keeps me away.
Sean places his glass down at the bar and walks over to Synn who is leaning up against the wall, Sean stands in front of Synn and grinds his body against Synn, Synn smiles as he moves his body along with Sean.
Synn may not have any rhythm, but him just standing against this wall is fine for me. I really enjoyed my week with Synn, I felt like he showed me a different side that I haven't seen in a long time, even though it took me some begging and other ways of persuasion to get him to come out, I really glad he did.
The music continues to play as Sean dances, the scene fades to black.
9 Hours Later
The scene opens up at the airport, Sean reaches down on the luggage carrier picking up his bag, he turns and looks at Synn who is standing by the exit door.
Sean: It feels so good to be home.
Sean walks toward the exit door, but before he could walk out.
Police Officer: Excuse me, Sean Williams?
Sean turns and looks at the Officer, Sean nods his head in agreement, but before Sean could opens his mouth, the police turns Sean around pressing him against the wall and pulling out his handcuffs.
Police Officer: I am placing you under arrest for violating your probation terms, remain silent while I read you your rights.
Synn makes his way over to Sean, but is forced back by a second Police Officer who was assisting the first cop.
Synn: I thought you took care of that Sean.
Sean: I did, I told Dr. Rodriguez I would be back today, I swear she probably called my probation officer and my fucking PO issued a warrant anyway.
Police Officer: Sir, at this time you are being placed under arrest and will be taken downtown to the Police Station. During that time you will be processed and booked into the city, a bail will be available after you see the commissioner.
Sean: Yeah, that is if they give me a fucking bail.
The scene fades to black.
Location:
Downtown Philadelphia (Center City)
Dr. Rodriguez Office
4:35 PM
The scene opens up with Sean shown sitting in Dr. Rodriguez Office, beside him is Synn who decided to come with Sean and show support.
I was really hesitant having Synn here with me, don't get me wrong, Synn knows a lot of the issues going on in my life. But It's embarrassing for me to let them hear these things, I'm just one fucked up individual who is only trying to turn their life around and hope for the best.
Dr. Rodriguez: Welcome back.
Sean rolls his eyes.
Dr. Rodriguez: I can tell your upset with me Sean and that's fine, but I have to do my job and lying is not part of the description.
Sean: I never asked you to lie Dr. Rodriguez, I just felt like the reason I gave you why I missed my appointment was because I had an event to do, and there was no way I could miss this.
Dr. Rodriguez: It wasn't about the event Mr. Williams, it was the fact that you blatantly ignored my phone calls and messages. The last we spoke, you advised me you were going to miss Monday's meeting, but you promised me you would be here on Tuesday and today is Thursday, I haven't heard from you all week, so what else should I expect.
Sean: I returned every phone call.
Dr. Rodriguez: I never received one message or phone call back from you after we spoke last, but I'm not here to argue with you Sean. I am here to do my job and that is to help you!
I could tell Synn wanted to say something so bad, but he promised me that he would just be here for support. The one thing I do like about Synn is how protective he can be, I know in the back of his head he knows that Dr. Rodriguez is only being tough with me because she wants to help, but deep inside I'm pretty sure he wants to curse this woman out.
Sean: I had a prior engagement and then was offered some money to make an appearance at a nightclub, you from all people should know my situation and why right now money is so important to me. I'm pretty sure your comfortable making your $150,000 or whatever you make a year salary and thats fine, but me, if opportunity comes knocking then I have to answer.
Dr. Rodriguez nods in agreement.
Dr. Rodriguez: I understand, but in this case and in your situation. I'm basically like your parent and your the child, you have to report to me and let me know your every move until the city of Philadelphia feels like your capable enough to live a normal lifestyle and not cause harm to yourself or anyone else.
Synn: If I may? -
Sean: Synn please, there's no need to -
Dr. Rodriguez interrupts both.
Dr. Rodriguez: Mr. Synn correct? [Pauses] Listen, I understand that your here in support for Sean and I understand that you want the best for him, but understand that this session is between Sean and I, and with you being here is only for support.
Synn closes his mouth and sits back in the chair, wanting to say something else, but out of respect for Sean and the doctor he decided to keep quiet.
I could tell Synn was a little annoyed, he never really liked doctors, or therapists. Maybe something happened in his past that made him feel this way and I completely understand, or maybe its just out of defense for me.Dr. Rodriguez: Now anyway, the last time we spoke. You were giving me some information about your Uncle and some of the things you experience while growing up around him, I would like to continue on that subject.
Sean turns his head and laughs to himself.
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I really appreciated that Synn took the time to come out and support me, but I know he hates when people judge me. I'm not saying that Dr. Rodriguez is judging me, but there are things that happened in my life that I am not happy about, that I'm not proud of, and wish I could go back in time and change. The issues I had with my uncle was very personal and very hurtful, there were things he wanted me to do that I didn't know were even possible. But the funny thing is I've forgiven that man, and I've moved on from it, there are only a few people that knew what happened to me when I was younger and they find it crazy that I still communicate with that man.Sean: What is that you want to know?
Dr. Rodriguez: How did it begin?
Sean: [Sighs] I was about 14 years old, and I had this magazine that had nude men on the cover, some of the pictures inside were vulgar. I think I just discovered masturbation and I don't know, I was always curious about the magazine and guys, curious about their bodies, their penises, but I never acted out on anything.
Dr. Rodriguez: So when did Brian come into the picture?
Sean: One day I was home, and -
FLASH BACKLocation:Los Angeles, California
June 24th, 1997
The scene opens up outside The Williams household, inside Sean is shown laying on his bad with one had in his pants and the other on the magazine, he closes his eyes and starts to imagine the men from the magazines but is interrupted when his bedroom door busts open.
Brian: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?
Sean: SHIT! NOTHING! [Sean tosses the magazine to the floor.] FUCKING NOTHING!...
Brian walks over to the other end of the bed reaches down to the ground, grabbing the magazine. He opens the magazine up and flips through the pages, a smile grows across his face as he lays the magazine down on the bed.
Brian: So my nephew is a punk.
Sean: I'm not a punk.
Brian: Do you think a real man would look at this crap? Where is these thoughts and images coming from? Have you messed or experimented with a man?
Sean: No.
Brian: I don't think your father would be to happy knowing his son is fucking Queer.
Sean: I'M NOT A QUEER! [Sean screams] SO STOP SAYING THAT SHIT!
Brian laughs.
Brian: This family is so fucked up, we got a queer in one room, a alcoholic in the other, and a drug addict in the basement. We should take the trophy for the best family ever!
Sean rolls his eyes, he jumps up from the bed and heads for the door but Brian grabs his arm and snatches it back towards him. Sean falls down on the bed, Brian climbs on top of Sean pinning his arms down to the bed.
Brian: If your gonna be a queer, then you need to do Queer things. So if you want this little secret to stay a secret, then I suggest you do as I say. [Unzip pants] I won't do anything that your probably not use to, I can make a lot of money of your cute ass.
Sean: What are you doing?
Brian: You'll see.
Brian positions his body further up on Sean's chest, he unbuckles his belt and then the button to his jeans and pulls his penis out through the hole in his pants and the scene fades to black.
FLASH BACK OVERThe scene opens up inside Dr. Rodriguez Office, Synn reaches his arm over and pulls Sean closer to him to comfort him.
This is exactly why I didn't want to discuss any of this, I just wanted to keep all this in the past, but its my doctor who wants to bring up old memories, memories that prevent me from moving on because for some reason their always brought up.Dr. Rodriguez: What happened next?
Sean: [Pauses] He forced his penis in my mouth and for five minutes, I endured his hot, sweaty penis going in and out of my mouth. I didn't like and I cried the whole time!
Dr. Rodriguez: I am so sorry to hear that.
Sean: Don't be sorry, I guess that's what queers do.
Synn shakes his head in disgust.
Dr. Rodriguez: You should of went to the police Sean, I'm pretty sure that if you would of seeked out help then a lot of the issues you have now, you probably wouldn't have.
Sean: Yeah, you may be right. But its to late for that now and honestly I just don't care anymore, I mean you sit back and you say how you want to help me and you feel like me talking about my past issues will help me but all it does is bring up old memories that I try and forget.
Dr. Rodriguez: That's not always the case.
Sean: It is for me, I mean I could of went to the police and told them that my Uncle prosituted me and made me perform sexual favors on him and for him, but it was his word against mine and during that time I was getting in trouble, so why would the police believe a juvenile?
Dr. Rodriguez: It wouldn't of hurt to try and in your case, a lot of issues dealing with child rape or molestation is taken very seriously and I think that if you would of handled it the proper way then you wouldn't be in the situation you are in now.
Its funny she says that, but me being gay, or me being molested when I was young wouldn't of changed how my life is now.Synn: Sorry to interrupt again, but we have an important match to train for so is there a way we can cut this short tonight and continue another day?
I could tell Synn was angry, he doesn't like hearing about my past, especially if I'm uncomfortable talking about it. Synn rose up from the chair grabbing both jackets, he extends his hand and shakes Dr. Rodriguez's hand and makes his way out the door.
Synn: I'll be out.
Dr. Rodriguez: That's fine.
Sean rises out of the chair also standing and facing Dr. Rodriguez.
Sean: I'm tired, I sat in jail and I have a very important match coming up and I just want to go home and get some rest.
Dr. Rodriguez: That's fine with me, and I understand. Just make sure you be here next Monday for your next session, there are a couple more issues we need to discuss and I have a questionnaire that I'll need you to feel out.
Sean nods his head and walks toward the door as the scene fades to black.
Location:Center City - Philadelphia, PA
Sean's Condo
The scene opens up in Sean's condo, Sean is showing laying on the couch while Synn is in the kitchen.
Synn: Hot pockets?
Sean: No, but a tuna sandwich will be nice.
Synn: Ugh, Tuna?!?
Sean: You know I like fish.
Synn: Confused me, I thought you liked beef! [Synn chuckles] But I will make you a tuna sandwich.
This was nice, I loved having Synn around again, no because he did things for me, but because he knew how to comfort me, he knew what to say and do to make me feel better, and plus I know with this match coming up, he would be the only one that could motivate me to go on and kick some ass, I mean since my time here in SCW I have been undefeated.Synn: You and Wyatt put a good show on last week, but you know this next match is even more important. You really gotta stay focus and keep your head in the game, especially if you want those tag titles.
Sean: Believe me I know, but I have to much on my mind right now and I already feel like I wont be focused enough on this match.
Synn: I'll be in your corner, so don't worry. Well not physically in your corner, but you know what I mean!
Sean: I just hope I can win this match, I've really proved myself these last two matches, everyone's favorite Queer is putting on a good show, taking names, and kicking some major ass.
Synn: And you've been doing a good job at it, keep your head up and just stay focus. I understand you have a lot of things happening in your life now and that's fine, but I see how committed you are to this federation and I want to see you succeed, hell even win the World Title.
Sean: That isn't even on my mind right now.
Synn: But it should, your are slowly but surely climbing this ladder and pretty soon you'll be at the top of your game, just don't let your outside personal life ruin what you have inside that ring, so far your undefeated and you should keep it that way.
Synn was right, the only way I could really prove to people that I'm good at what I do is to keep my mind focused and not let anyone beat me and thats exactly what I intend on doing.Synn: Trust me, you'll be fine.
Sean nods in agreement, he gets up from the couch and walks into the kitchen giving Synn a kiss on the cheek.
Synn: Don't start something you can't finish.
Sean laughs as the scene fades to black.
