Independance
You step out on your own for the first time and the first thing you feel is fear.
Fear of the unknown. Fear of the future, fear of loss. After living in and under the umbrella and safety of a parent or institution for so long being by yourself can be utterly terrifying. Especially if you are unprepared and unsecured in your future.
Now, if that doesn’t sound like you, if the thought of independence from those institutions and parents is one of freedom, not fear, then…well…
Congratulations.
You had a healthy childhood and a healthy upbringing.
But being under that cloud, under that umbrella, a place where you are told repeatedly you will be safe and happy. And without them, well, you won’t be. Outside all of that is unsafe and dangerous, a real world full of pain, suffering and anger.
It is hard to pull away, hard to leave and hard to live your own life.
But it means more than you know, to walk away.
The meeting
Her hands were normally steady and unmoving. In fact it was something that she found pride in. Keeping her nerves calm through everything she had done and would do. In big moments of her life, through volleyball finals and school graduations and even huge debuts and moments in her wrestling career, Zoey Lukas was calm and measured. But not with this. Not right now. Her blond and black coloured hair was slicked back, her face covered in warmer makeup colours than her usual darker ones, she wore a pair of blacj jeans and a white and red slimk fitting top covered with a black leather jacket.
She watched the trees and houses fly by as she leaned against the leather seats in the back of the car, her left leg propped up with her left arm on her knee as her hand shook. She took in a deep breath and rubbed her hands together to try and calm them down, when a hand from her right came across and grabbed hers. The hand of Aron Baltasarsson.
He squeezed her hand and got her attention, he gave her a small smile and a nod, his short, wavy light brown hair and trimmed beard making him look as distinguished as ever along with his navy blue suit and white shirt. A contrast in style to Zoey. ”Are you alright?” Zoey gave him a nod in return and pushed out a breath, Aron laughed and shook his head before replying. ”I know that it’s bothering you Zo..”
She groaned and took a deep breath before looking back out the window and closing her hands around each other. ”I just know how annoying this whole thing will be. She thinks she’s right all the time, she thinks she knows whats best despite the fact she is usually wrong…she was wrong about Ali’s life and she’s wrong about mine…”
There was anger in Zoeys voice. A spitting venom that was on the tip of her tongue. Aron, fop his part gave her a nod and listened intently. But at the same time his eyes were soft and calm. He was the calming influence Zoey needed ”Mothers always do that Zoey, I’m sorry to say, you’re isn’t special or unique.” He chuckled and sat back looking at his watch and then back at Zoey. ”You need to realise that. You’ll never be happy unless you do. She isn’t trying to make your life harder for her sake, she believes shes right because it’s the only way she knows how to show affection…”
Zoey nods and throws her hands in the air, both understanding Arons point and being frustrated by it. She clears her throat and tries to stay calm in the conversation. ”I just don’t understand Aron. I don’t get why she can’t just say she loves me and if I’m happy then that is enough. Why does she have to write you off and beleive I’m incapable of maming choices to benefit myself?”
He laughed as they pulled up to the large stately home of Barbera Maxwell, the mother of the Lukas sisters. He reached over, grabbing her hand again and laughed. ”You dopon’t get it do you? No one will ever be good enough for you.”
Zoey raised her eyebrow. ”What?”
Aron leaned over, kissing Zoey on the lips softly and resting his hand on her cheek. ”It could be anyone. Me, your ex, a CEO of a fortune 5oo company or a guy who febricates engine parts in a factory, no matter the profession or background no one will ever be good enough for you in your mothers eyes…” He sits back and reaches out grabbing the door handle. ”Don’t take it personally Zoey…I’m not…”
As he got out of the car Zoey blinked as few times, the realization hitting her like a ton of bricks. She looked out at the door, her mother standing up the steps in front of it waiting as Aron moved around and opened Zoeys side, holding out his hand. Zoey laughed and shook her head taking it and stepping out before Aron offered her his arm, every instinct was telling her to just walk herself, but she softened, took his arm and walked up the steps. Her mother seemed to soften to, shocked Zoey let Aron be a gentleman. Zoey took a deep breathy and slosed her eyes before speaking.
”Mom, this is Aron Baltasarsson…”
The fall.
”Lady luck is a bitch, that is just the stone cold truth of all of it. The last match I had before into the void was ruined by luck. I want to be honest hereI am not a person who likes to make excuses.In fact when others make excuses it makes my stomach turn and usually brings a boiling anger up from deep down inside me.”
Zoey sneers, the light coloured makeup from the previous off camera scene now replaced on camera by the usual dark lipstick and eyeliner, a small black stripe across her cheek in a nod to her sisters “warpaint”
”Ariana was lucky. That’s it. I am someone who can face up to a loss and can admit when they have failed but Ariana didn't beat me comma she survived me full stop one on one everyone knows that I should have destroyed her,but because of an ill timed move and some steel steps I was robbed of the opportunity to realize my destiny and take my place in a match against one of the best this business has ever seen. I should have faced Roxi, I should have been the one to challenge her. The fact is Ariana should never have been in the position to rain man herself into the goddamn match.”
“And when given this opportunity, when dropped into a situation like this with a golden ticket placed on a silver platter right in front of her, what exactly did Ariana do with it? Did she seize it and take it with both hands and do everything she could to walk out of that show as the all conquering underdog champion? No of course not.She failed. She faced Roxi Johnson and she fell in a heap all because she knew going into it that she didn't deserve to be there and that she was not in any position to challenge a woman like her.”
“The sad fact is I should have been the one to face Roxi.”
“But where do I go from here? What is next for meI just had two opportunities slip right through my fingers. The blast from the past tournament was something that I was excited for especially with my partner.But we failed, we ended up in a position where we couldn't win, and after that the company and management saw enough in me to let me have another opportunity and that was taken away by the cruel hand of luck, fate,and the amusement of the masses…”
Zoey shrugs and shakes her head, disappointed in the answer.
”Well, the immediate answer to that question is Samantha Marlowe. Now, excuse me if I'm not excited about this match. I'm not sure why I ever would be.Sam is someone who I have already faced, who I have already beaten, and everything I said about her months ago is still relevant today.And everything she said about me? Well some of it is relevant and some of it never made a lick of sense.But what can she say different about me today? When she and I faced off last time I was an unknown quantity in Sin City wrestling.I was just the younger sister of Alicia Lukas,someone who was physically dominating for sure but no one knew what I was capable of.Sam was supposed to be my first big test.”
“It was a test I passed with flying colours.”
“But in the months since she and I last faced one another what has happened?I have gone from strength to strength competing in the blast from the past and getting opportunities, only to be beaten by the aforementioned luck and happenstance.Sam seems to have slowly stepped backwards further and further into obscurity and irrelevance.I remember before we faced one another last timeI went down her rap sheet of accomplishments and accolades. Her championship wins and biggest moments in this company.And after all of that I asked a very simple question.What have you done for me lately?”
“Well, what have you done for me lately Sam?”
Zoey rolls her eyes and shakes her head.
”You were able to beat Mercedes Vargas. Congratulations. Being able to beat one of your biggest rivals that you have faced a million times before must have felt liberating for you in some way. The only problem is neither you or Mercedes Vargas are the names that you believe yourselves to be anymore.I beat Mercedes right after I beat you. I put you both in your place and you two wheeled out the old school nostalgia act at into the void and you were able to walk away the winner after standing there and somehow telling the world that you were going to “solve the mystery” of Mercedes. Mystery? Are you kidding me? Sam you faced Mercedes a few times a year per year for the last decade. If you are still finding things to be mysterious about her then you really do not have any right to talk shit about anyone ever.”
“It did get me thinking. How exactly do you feel about me? Mercedes is someone who you have faced so many times you should know her like the back of your hand. Me though? While you have faced my sister and gone to war with her you've only faced me once.And yeah that one time I put you down and you felt what it's like to be in the ring with someone who's physically more dominant but what exactly do you think of me now?”
Am I the next big mystery that you hope to solve?”
“Who knows?But, do you know what you are to me?You are just a target. Someone that they are putting me up against so that I can re find my footing in this company and remind everyone what kind of monster they are dealing with.I made a horrible mistake going into that stupid tournament and I made an even bigger mistake when I allowed Ariana to get the better of me and go on to face Roxi. I am going to refuse right here and right now to make any mistakes that are going to cost me in my match against you. Not just because I need to re establish myself as a monster, not just because I need to start climbing that ladder again.But because I know, no matter how irrelevant you are right now and how much you are struggling you are still dangerous. You are still a veteran in this business who knows how to take advantage of anyone's mistakes.The only way you can beat me Sam, is if I first beat myself.And I'm not going to let that happen.”
