[Christian Underwood]

Please post all roleplays here! Have fun and good luck!

[Julianna DiMaria]

November 5

A couple of hours following my title defense against Courtney Pierce, it was completely loud around me. Christy and Ally were having a hell of a time drinking while I was just staring at my glass of water. They were chatterboxes, but I was frustrated and angry. There was some dancing nearby, but I was in no mood to even bother. My friends were talking about going out on the dance floor at the club we were at and they tried to drag me along.

“Come on Jules, let’s go have fun!” Ally said.

“Yeah! You just beat that stupid bitch Courtney again!” Christy added.

I rolled my eyes and this drew their attention.

“Are you okay? You’ve been completely quiet.”

I got annoyed with Ally’s question.

“I would’ve thought that sending Courtney to the back of the line would’ve been something to celebrate. Come on! Have fun with us! Maybe we can find you a guy!”

“Why the FUCK did Ariana Angelos get involved?” I said with anger in my voice. I couldn’t even be happy that I retained against Courtney considering the shenanigans that were involved. “GOD, dealing with Courtney’s stupid kindergarten nonsense was an ANNOYANCE enough and now she and anyone else that wants to pile on their hatred of me get to say ‘well she only retained because Ariana helped her’...”

“And you started giving a damn about what those weak minded bitches think… when?” Christy asks.

“It’s not that I give a shit. I DON’T. But I was brought up to be a better champion than that! I PROVED I can be a top tier champion that can take this division to heights its never seen before when I beat the bitch to begin with at High Stakes but to have that ASTERISK added to my first fucking title defense fucking BOTHERS ME! GOD! Why couldn’t that pathetic worm Ariana just stayed the FUCK out of it? That title defense isn’t even WORTH celebrating!”

“There she goes again…” Ally mutters under her breath.

“I heard that! Neither of you have gotten past the Indies in your career so you could never understand why this bothers me. That’s NOT how I wanted to start my title reign.”

“At the end of the day, you still won…” Christy reminds me. I could only muster up a sigh and an eye roll showing that ‘still winning’ was not even close to being good enough for me. “Shouldn’t that be all that matters?”

“I don’t want to hear that shit, Christy.” I snap back at her. “I don’t even know why the fuck I bothered coming here anyway! I have NOTHING worth celebrating! You can call me a perfectionist, you can tell me that I have a stick up my ass, I don’t give a shit! But the thing is, the previous two times I was a world champion, I was CONSTANTLY retaining those titles WITHOUT any of that asterisk nonsense. I understand that almost all of those bitches have petty feuds and massive egos, but COME ON!”

“Look at you talking about massive ego…” Ally says with a scoff.

“Are you DRUNK?” I ask Ally, who just shrugs and walks away. I rolled my eyes and bolted not just from them, but from the club also. My anger regarding how my first title defense went down was clearly overwhelming my conscience. I found an empty bench nearby and sat on it. I wasn’t feeling like a champion at all. In fact, all I could feel was shame.

“I’ve always taken pride in my work…” I admitted in my head. “I’ve NEVER been that type of bitch to accept asterisk victories or those types of wins where you can add a ‘but this’ at the end. Honestly, I’m fucking ashamed of myself for having THAT be my first title defense.”

I hung my head and let out a sigh. Even though I won, I felt like I had lost in reality.

“My father taught me better…”

I got up and walked toward my rental car, reflecting on that very fact.

August 2017

“Your first championship…” my father says to me as I approach him in the training ring of his wrestling school. “WCG West Coast Champion. That has a nice ring to it. I’m glad you’ve got a title to your name.”

“Thanks dad…” I said with a smile, hoping this would create a bonding moment between us. “This is the most exciting time of my life so far.”

“I mean… you only won that title after a small handful of losses to wrestlers beneath you in ability and after previously losing a title match…”

I sighed, knowing that there was going to be no bonding moment.

“I understand, but the fact that I’ve got the West Coast title now is the most important thing, is it not?


“Fair…” my father says. I could tell in his facial expression that he wasn’t all too impressed. “...but, considering you struggled more than you needed to in order to win that title you have now, you HAVE to be a dominant champion! You have to show that roster that you mean business and that you’re not a weakling, vulnerable champion. You have to crush the competition, not let them hang around because you have a tendency to let weaker competition hang with you too much.”

“Dad, I get it! Dominant champion! I am going to do whatever I have to do to keep this title with me for as long as I can.”

“You say it, but you don’t mean it. In this case, you don’t know HOW to mean it…”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve got to go into every defense acting like EVERY challenger is weaker than you. YOU have the belt. THEY don’t, so that makes YOU better! Assert your dominance, Julianna. If you have to cheat to retain and assert said dominance, you go ahead and cheat!”

I chuckled at this, knowing my father would obviously endorse such a thing.

“Just don’t have anyone interfere in your title matches because that’s bullshit.”

“...huh?” I was very confused as I wasn’t expecting that from my father.  “It’s STILL a win, Dad…” I said, showing the ignorance I had at the time. “What? You’re showing me honor now?”

“No fuck that! You need to show that you’re a champion that can stand on your own two feet and keeping a title because of help is bullshit. If you cheat to win a title defense, that’s one thing. It’s still YOU being smart and figuring out how to do it on your own. If you have to cheat, then fucking cheat. But if you need people interfering and helping you retain that championship you have there, then it’s fucking chickenshit and when I was in that ring myself, I never respected any champion that retained that way. When I was a champion myself, I made sure that’s NOT the kind of champion I was. What I need to drill into your head is that someone that needs to rely on other people for help in keeping a championship can NEVER… and I mean NEVER… be a true champion.”

I soaked this in from my father who had a stern expression on her face.

“Do you understand what I am telling you? Don’t be that ‘retain by interference’ champion. Not once. Not EVER. If that’s the kind of champion you are, then you might as well drop it off at your boss’s desk and start over again because you’re not a champion at that point, you’re a charity case.”

“I understand…” I said with a nod. My father nods back at me and then makes his exit. I took once glance at the title and with the fear of disappointing my father obviously instilled in me, I took a sigh and definitely felt a bit of anxiety knowing that a charity case is the last thing I wanted to be.

This lesson never left me all of these years later…

Which is exactly why I was so bent about how I retained my championship against Courtney…

Black Friday

I walked into my living room after having done my holiday shopping. I put down my bags and then sat on my couch. Ally sent me a text message asking me if I was ready for my next title defense, which was Mercedes Vargas at that point. I didn’t bother responding. All that text message did was put me in a bad mood. I absolutely wasn’t over the title defense against Courtney and I was doing my best to hide that.

“I don’t even want to think about it…” I said to myself. “I’m honestly not even up to facing Mercedes. I obviously don’t lack confidence in beating her and I’m not overlooking her, but the way I retained against Courtney is still fucking bothering me…”

I took a moment to lament what had happened. Courtney and I were neck and neck before Ariana interfered and I wound up winning. My anger was beginning to seethe and I felt the living room suddenly get colder.

My father wasn’t there, but I could feel his presence.

In my head, I could already imagine him telling me “I’m so disappointed in you for how you retained.”

Despite the fact that it was in my own mind, all I felt was shame.

“How can you accept retaining that title that way especially when you straight up beat her at High Stakes?” he asks.

I continued to imagine that back and forth we’d be having on the couch if he were still here. I was shaking. How could I respond to that?

“Why don’t you shut the fuck up?” I said back to my father.

“You know I am right. You know the way that you retained against Courtney was bullshit. You’re better than that, Julianna. We both know that! I recognize how strong you are as a champion and as a wrestler which is why I wrote you that letter to begin with, remember?”

“It’s not even my fault…” I attempted to remind him as this fantasy conversation continued in my head. “I didn’t ask for help. I didn’t want Ariana to interfere. I would NEVER have wanted her or ANYONE else to get involved. You of all people should know that I would never want to retain a title that way because that’s exactly what you taught me and I wasn’t going to just flush that down the toilet. I’m SORRY that the title defense didn’t go the way I wanted it to go, but don’t tell me I disappointed you because I didn’t! So much for us finally being in a good place with each other…”

“We ARE in a good place, Julianna…” my father retorted. “I’m trying to look out for you now. I know that how I treated you before was wrong and I accept my own fuck ups. I messed up as your father. I own that. But I didn’t mess up with your trainer. There’s a standard of excellence I passed down on you that we both know you must maintain.”

“God, did we even make peace at ALL?” I asked him, feeling pretty aggravated. “I’m not proud of how I retained against Courtney. That bullshit interference bothers me just as much as it bothers you. We don’t need to be at war all over again like when you were alive. Clearly, being dead hasn’t humbled you a bit.”

“We’ve made peace and I understand that wasn’t your fault…”

My phone suddenly rang.

“You probably want to get that, Julianna…”

The air in the room got warmer again and I snapped out of my “if my father was still here” conversation and my internal conflict as I answered the call without seeing who it was.

“Ally, I don’t want to…”

“Hi honey…” I heard my mother say, catching me off guard. “...is everything okay?”

“Mom…” I sighed as I said this. “I’m fine…”

“You were very distant yesterday during Thanksgiving dinner…” my mother points out. “...you’re not fine. Something is clearly bothering you and HAS been bothering you. You’ve barely communicated with me all month.”

“Mom, aren’t you recovering from your kidney removal?” I asked, trying to flip the subject. “I should be the one looking out for you right now.”

“Nice try, Julianna. I’m your mother and as long as I’m here, I’m always going to look out for you. When I know something is off with you, then something is dragging you down. So, come out with it young lady. What’s wrong?”

I knew at that point, I wasn’t going to shake her.

“I feel like an asterisk champion…”

“You’re still not over that title defense?”

“I’m STILL frustrated! I PROVED that I could beat Courtney and then to have someone else get involved when I face her again… it’s STILL upsetting to me. I can’t have title defenses like that. It’s just so subpar! It’s so beneath what I’m supposed to be about as a champion, who I am as a wrestler and the standards of the title that I have.”

“I understand your feelings honey, but you’ve got to let go of that and move on. You’ve got another title defense coming up against Mercedes Vargas and you can’t be hung up on that last defense and lose your focus.”

“It’s MERCEDES, Mom…” I said with a scoff, dismissing my upcoming next challenger entirely. “I’ve got this.”

“You can’t take that attitude with ANY challenger, I don’t care how worthy they are of an opponent.”

“Oh my GOD… the last thing I need tonight is ANOTHER parent telling me how I need to be as a champion?”

“Pardon me?” my mother said, understandably confused. “Did your father visit you in a dream or something?”

“If he was still here, he’d be giving me the business about how I retained against Courtney.”

“You don’t need to worry about what he, or ANYONE else has to say about that title defense, you understand me? If Courtney wants to chirp about what happened, then let her. You still won against her at High Stakes and THAT should matter more than anything. You PROVED you could win against her without the shenanigans and we both know that interference or not, you would’ve retained anyway. So please honey, quit getting so worked up about it. It’s one defense. If that’s your only defense where it goes that way, then what does it matter in the long run?”

“You make a strong point mother…” I said, taking a deep breath and finally being able to at least begin to move forward from all the anger and frustration I was feeling with that title defense. “There are still plenty more defenses ahead for me to prove exactly what kind of champion I am capable of being.”

“That’s exactly right. Now, aren’t you glad that you still have me to look out for you at a time like this?”

My mother laughed as I rolled my eyes.

“Sure mother, whatever…” I said with a chuckle.

“Sunday should negate what happened with Courtney, I’m sure. You obviously need nobody’s help to beat her.”

“That’s the truth…” I admitted with confidence. I took a few seconds to let things sink in before I decided to change the conversation toward other non-career related subjects.

I was able to at least have a spark going into that title defense against Mercedes…

Only for my frustrations regarding my “interference” circumstance to grow even worse once that match against Mercedes came and went…

December 9

…and believe me, when I turned my camera on while I was visiting the desert landmark of the Tucson Botanical Gardens, I was STILL carrying much of that anger and frustration from TWO title defenses at this point. I placed the Bombshells Championship over my shoulder and then took a few deep breaths as I did what I could to at least quell the anger in me from those defenses. I was as cool as I could be, but I still couldn’t help myself as I began to express my thoughts.

“I have a little PSA for the entire Bombshells roster…”

I sighed before I just let it out.

“QUIT INTERFERING IN MY FUCKING TITLE DEFENSES! I DON’T need your fucking help to beat ANYONE on this fucking roster!”

I paused to take a deep breath and fully focus on what was coming up.

“Now that I got THAT out of the way, let’s get to the matter at hand. Before I won this championship, I said that this division needed a kick in the ass and I admit that STILL holds true. I’m doing the damn best that I can do to prop this division up again, but look around and see what’s happening. When was the last time the Bombshells actually main evented a Supercard? I’m talking about being the LAST match in the show… not a co-main event, but literally the closing match of the show. It’s been a while! In fact, my predecessor as a champion was never in the closing match of a supercard during her entire title reign. I get that the J2H-Harris feud was a big huge thing, but SHE didn’t do enough to at least supplant that feud for at least ONE Supercard. I get that J2H is a big deal, but I’m JUST as good of a champion as he is and FINALLY, I get a chance to prove it. The BULLSHIT of my first two defenses are NOT going to happen here and Bella Madison, I’m sorry but there’s so much anger that I am STILL carrying from those defenses that I am taking out on you. In fact, when I speak about propping this division up again, I am looking at an example of WHY the Bombshells haven’t main evented a Supercard in months.

YOU are the best viable challenger for my title?

YOU?

Look, I’ve given you props on your win to even get here and I have even acknowledged your pedigree and your talent. You are absolutely not the worst Bombshell on the roster, but my first Supercard title defense is against YOU? YOU being here is an EPITOME of how far this division has fallen under my predecessor because not only is it YOU that is here, but the ‘competition’ that you had to face to get here? What in the actual fuck? Seleana Zdunich? Seriously? One of the worst records on the roster this year got a chance to be in that mini-tournament and of course YOU were lucky  enough to draw her. This mini-tournament was literally Luna’s tournament to win and she CHOKED against Krystal which that was stroke of luck number one for you because if it’s Luna and not Krystal, you’re not even HERE right now. You wanted it more than Krystal, that is DEFINITELY fact but what if Krystal actually fought like she wanted it like you did instead of looking past you and acting like she was entitled to the shot?

Would you even be here?

I’m not so sure I can say that much. After all, it only took you like six tries or however many tries it did for you to FINALLY beat Krystal Wolfe for the first time and when it takes you that many tries to beat the personification of mediocrity in my division, then I question so much about you. But ultimately? YOU are who I have to face and YOU are who I have to focus on. It’s funny how easily offended you are, going off on your little subtweet tangent about how you’re not your mother and all of that and taking shots at some things I said about your motivation… without TAGGING ME by the way… which is hilarious considering you went off about Krystal not tagging you during her sore loser bullshit…

Oh HI hypocrite, nice meeting you… anyway… just the fact that you are THAT easily offended to where you have to take those subtweets at me is already putting you behind the eight ball against me. Here’s a harsh truth to get offended by, Bella…

You’re not ready for this. You KNOW you’re not ready for this. In fact, I wouldn’t be shocked if there was some little sneaky bitch in your subconscious telling you that you don’t even deserve this. You’re coming in here acting as if this return of yours is different than your original run and you’re giving off these lame warnings that you’re not going to be as nice as your mother and you’re trying SO HARD to act like you’re DIFFERENT but let me fill you in on a secret here, Bella.

Results MATTER!

And on THAT front, you’re NOT different. Seleana is no longer a main event contender. Krystal will NEVER be a main event contender. So beating people like THAT to get a world title shot doesn’t change the narrative that has ALWAYS swallowed your career and that narrative is that when it comes to getting results around here, you ALWAYS drop the ball. You want to say that I haven’t paid attention to anything that you’ve done at all, but let me ask you a question Bella. You’ve been in SCW since 2019. You want to talk about how I haven’t paid attention to anything you’ve done at all from that point. So, my question is… exactly WHAT is there to pay attention to? Tell me, Bella. WHAT? The fact that you PROVED that you’re STILL that same fucking wrestler that can’t produce the results that matter in just your first match back when Bobbie Dahl beat you? Hell, I’ll even say that Bobbie is BETTER than the two people you beat to even get this title shot and I question why YOU, someone she beat, got the opportunity here and not her. Tell me what there is to pay attention to, Bella?

The fact that you’ve been here since 2019 and you haven’t won ONE singles championship?

Name a time you were a Blast from the Past finalist. Name a time you won an award. Name ONE memorable win that you had. That mixed tag team title win against Wolfslair when Sass N Bash was a thing that not only didn’t make it past the next Supercard cycle, but was more than THREE YEARS AGO? Name ONE memorable MATCH you had. What? The one time you ALMOST won this very title from Amber Ryan how long ago? And you capitalized on that ALMOST moment, HOW, Bella? There’s a reason why I am doing this promo from a literal desert because that’s ALL your SCW career has EVER been. You’ve hung around as long as you have and you’ve made WHAT impact? Being literally the most forgotten member of Wolfslair in their entire history here?

Doesn’t the fact that you joined them and yet you STILL didn’t get over the hump tell you something? Yet, here you are with a championship match literally because you had a horseshoe up your ass in a mini-tournament that barely had any competition for you to overcome. If the powers that be want to host a contender’s tournament, they should’ve chosen the BEST FOUR Bombshells on the roster regardless of whether they’re a champion or not or whether they’ve got other distractions or commitments going on. If it were up to ME, the best four Bombshells to be in that position would be Kayla Richards, Luna Pasilano, Alexandra Calloway and… as much as I hate to say it, Courtney Pierce… or even Bobbie Dahl. But nope, four of those names I just mentioned were caught up in other things and Luna choked. You shouldn’t have even GOTTEN that opportunity in the first place if the dominoes fell the way they should’ve. So ask yourself this Bella…

Are you even READY for this?

Do you even DESERVE this?”

I paused and rolled my eyes at this.

“I don’t think so. You can say that you are all that you want, but you and I both know it’s all a smokescreen especially since going into your match with Seleana, you even ADMITTED that you questioned if you were ready to come back here after Bobbie had beaten you. You’re trying to preach about how this is a ‘new Bella’ a ‘better Bella’ and how things are going to be so different this time around and yet, there you were admitting that at one point, you were questioning things so all I can do is just scoff and laugh in your face when you talk about how you’re not defined by setbacks, but how you rise from them. We can debate whether you are defined by your setbacks or not all night long, I’m not necessarily interested in that. But I will tell you straight up that you’re NOT defined by how you rise from your setbacks. That, I KNOW is a fact and you want to know how I know that? Because you’ve NEVER risen from your setbacks at all! NEVER! Not ONE time in SCW! If you ever HAVE risen from a setback, you’d have a singles championship to show for it! You’re the Little Engine that constantly thinks she can, but for whatever reason, she  DOESN’T! I am no psychologist, Bella. I am not going to pretend like I know everything that goes on in your head, but doesn’t it at least BOTHER you or even MOTIVATE you to know that you’ve been associated with SCW for HOW long and you’ve never held a belt on your own? Does it even bother you at all that no matter how hard you try, you’ve never gotten over the hump?

This is what I mean when I say that I feel you lack motivation at times.

Because you get knocked down over and over again and you get back up to fight another day yet, you STAGNATE! You don’t do a damn thing differently. With your SCW career, the horse has left the barn so damn long ago that I doubt even being a mother yourself now is enough of a motivator to finally get over the damn hump. I say that you lack motivation because through it all, from what I’ve studied of your career, from what I know about your career here, the narrative never changes around here. Some Bombshells are meant to never be a world champion and just MAYBE you might be one of them. Bombshells better than you that are no longer here came, went and never become a world champion so what makes you think you stand a chance in hell of beating me when the narrative around you is that you are the perpetual bridesmaid of the Bombshells division that, Bobbie Dahl aside, just might have the longest drought in SCW history of never winning a singles championship?

Motivation isn’t about just HAVING it, Bella.

Motivation is about WHAT exactly yours is.

If your motivation is to prove me wrong and shut me up, fuck off and forget about it because at that point, I’m in your head and you’ve already lost.

If your motivation is to be a proud mother… cute… but being ‘inspirational mom’ doesn’t win you SHIT in this business.

My motivation isn’t to make a damn person proud of me and it sure as hell isn’t to prove anyone wrong because from the moment I’ve been here, I’ve only fought for ME! I didn’t have to prove ANYONE wrong and no matter what empty words my predecessor threw at me leading up to High Stakes, I NEVER felt the need to prove her wrong. No, for me this is the defense where I DEFINE what a Bombshells Champion is supposed to be. This is the defense where I assert myself as THE woman to watch around here. This is the defense where there won’t be any fucking asterisks or any fucking bullshit and by the time I am done making an example out of you, I will leave NO FUCKING DOUBT that I deserve to be here and that I deserve to be the SCW Bombshells World Champion!

At December 2 Dismember, when I retain against you, I will continue my mission of getting this division BACK to the prominence that it deserves to have and I will do EVERYTHING in my power to make sure that the next Supercard DOES have the Bombshells title match as the last match on the show. I’m not even close to being done with my unreal run and someone like YOU isn’t going to stop me at all! After the way my first two defenses have gone, I’m NOT going to fucking slack against you. I am NOT going to make the same fucking mistake that Krystal Wolfe made against you. Yeah, be motivated bitch…

But ultimately? MY motivations for this title defense are MUCH better than whatever yours are.

You may have wanted it more than Krystal… but if your history of stagnation and never growing as a wrestler here are any indication… you DEFINITELY don’t want it more than I do…

And that is why, Bella… when it’s all said and done, I’m going to take that glass slipper you’re wearing and I’m going to shove it up your ass!”

I knew that I was still carrying anger from my previous two title defenses with that last line. But, by that point, I didn’t care. I shut off the camera and took a deep breath while I took in the gardens.

My mission going into D2D?

It was to cement my dominance of the division I reigned over and to FINALLY have a title defense I could at least be happy with for a change.

[BellaMadison]

*~*A Surprising Victory*~*
Climax Control
Phoenix, AZ

Her music and the cheers of the crowd still echoed through the arena as Bella Madison made her way backstage, the taste of victory lingering on her lips and buzzing off her sweat soaked skin. The backstage area was a hive of activity, with wrestlers, crew members, and staff moving about in a chaotic yet organized dance that was as much a part of the show as the matches themselves.

Bella, still catching her breath, couldn't help but replay the match in her mind within moments of getting backstage and she was sure that she would go back and watch it all over again with Mal, her mother and even those at Wolfslair. Krystal Wolfe had been a formidable opponent, and the odds seemed stacked against her. Yet, against all expectations and the surprise of a few, Bella emerged victorious. Her heart raced with the adrenaline of the unexpected triumph.

As she navigated the labyrinthine halls of the backstage area, a mix of disbelief and elation played on her features. She half-expected someone to tap her on the shoulder and say, ‘Sorry, it was a mistake. Krystal actually won.’ But the reality of the situation settled in with each step.

Malachi, who had been watching the match from backstage, spotted Bella making her way through the corridor. A proud smile crept across his face as he approached her. "Bells, you did it! I can't believe it, but you did it!"

Bella, still processing the moment, looked at Malachi with wide eyes and a laugh on her lips, "I know, right? I mean, I knew I had it in me, but against Krystal? That's a huge win!"

Malachi enveloped her in a congratulatory hug. "You're incredible. I've never seen you move like that. It's like you tapped into a whole new level out there."

Bella chuckled, the reality of the victory sinking in. She tucks her head, still trying to play it out on how it just all happened, "Maybe I did. Apparently, I did. I guess there's nothing like a surprising win to make you question everything you thought you knew about yourself."

As they continued down the corridor, the backstage crew and fellow wrestlers offered congratulatory nods and cheers. Bella's victory had sent ripples through the locker room, proving that, on any given night, anything could happen in the world of professional wrestling. That, and she was about to head to December 2 Dismember to take on the SCW Bombshell Champion.

Reaching the privacy of the Bombshell’s dressing room, Bella let out a long exhale, pulling away from Mal with a smile, "I need a moment to process this. It's like I stepped into a parallel universe where I can defeat anyone."

Malachi grinned, leaning against a nearby wall, reaching out and pushing a few strands of Bella’s hair away from her face, "Well, get used to it. You earned this, and it's just the beginning. Who knows what's next for you?"

Bella smirked, a newfound confidence gleaming in her eyes. "Actually, that part is simple. December 2 Dismember against Julianna. I got 2 weeks to somehow get even better. BUT...I think...right now, I need a shower and maybe a moment to let this victory sink in. This is a game-changer."

Malachi nodded, squeezing her hand. "Take your time. I'll be right here, celebrating the unexpected triumph." Bella gives him a look, as if to say give her a little bit of time, and he smirks, “Ok, I’ll go get Máire and then we’ll get some take out and pray she sleeps through the night.”

That perks Bella up a bit, “Ooo, Chinese and Pizza?”

“OR, Bells.[/color]” Even after 4 months after having Máire it seemed like her appetite hadn’t changed much and her metabolism still was burning on high.

But she couldn’t resist pouting just a little bit, with her hands on her hips, “Both, Mal!”

“And we see where Máire gets it from,” Mal says with a roll of his eyes and a peck on his wife’s lips, with a slight shove towards the door, “Go take your shower, sassmaster.”

She smiles and before she steps over the threshold, “Love you too, Oscar.”

As Bella disappeared into the dressing room, the sounds of the bustling backstage area faded into the background. The victory had not only surprised the fans but had left an indelible mark on Bella herself. As she stood under the shower, letting the hot water wash away the physical and emotional strains of the match, Bella Madison pondered the unpredictable nature of the wrestling world and the new challenges and victories that awaited her on the horizon.

“Alright, girl...you got yourself there. Now let’s finish it.”

*~*Magical First Encounter with Santa*~*
34th Street, NYC

It was a crisp December day in the heart of New York City, and the O'Connell family was braving the bustling streets, making their way to the iconic Macy's. Máire, bundled up in her specially crafted Christmas dress by Mattie Cormier, or as she's come to be known as Auntie Mattie, looked like a little snow princess in Malachi's arms.

Malachi, slightly apprehensive about navigating the holiday chaos, glanced at Bella with a hint of worry. "You sure about this, Bells? The crowds, the lines... I'm not sure Máire is ready for all of this."

Bella, ever the optimist, flashed a bright smile. "Come on, Mal. It's Máire's first Christmas, and we have to make it magical! Macy's Santa is a tradition, and we can't miss it. She may not remember this but we will and we will be able to tell everyone about it. Besides, we saw how she was with the tree this week. I think it’s going to be amazing. Just think of this as another core memory for us as a family."

“I just don’t see why we had to go here. Your grandfather told you he was going to have Santa visit his business for all his employee’s families. That would be less toned down than what this is going to be.” Mal was not one for crowds to begin with and even with it being a weekday, the whole area was constantly buzzing with people shopping.

Bella turned on her heels and placed her hand on her husband’s chest as he kept a firm grasp on Máire, “Babe, trust me on this, okay? I know that you don’t do well with the huge mad rush of the Christmas season, but this is something amazing. You’ll see.”

With determination, they maneuvered through the festive crowd, Máire's wide eyes absorbing the twinkling lights and the hum of excitement. As they approached Santa's enchanting workshop, adorned with sparkling decorations, a sense of holiday wonder filled the air.

“Ooo, someone is already soaking it all in. You see all the pretty lights, don’t ya sweetie?” Bella said as she removed Máire’s tiny winter coat with her still in Mal’s arms.

Mattie's creation for Máire, a dress adorned with tiny snowflakes and a matching headband, captured the essence of the season. Bella couldn't resist but to gush over her daughter. "Look at our little snow princess! Mattie did an amazing job."

Malachi nodded, appreciating the craftsmanship but still a bit uneasy about what awaited them. "I just hope she doesn't get overwhelmed."

“Stop being such a worry-wart. She feeds off that energy, ya know?” Bella said with a smirk.

“We always hear about the nightmare stories of the first time babies meet a stranger like this. She can barely stand having people fuss over her when we go to SCW. You don’t see her tucking herself into me when people come up to just say ‘hi’ to her.” Mal grumbles.

“Once again, are you sure that’s just not her feeding off your energy of being genuinely anti-social?” Bella says with the raise of her eyebrow.

Mal goes to retort but stops himself and shrugs, “....well...maybe. Ok, you make a fair point. Cut me some slack though, Bells. I’m protective about my girls.”

“And we love you for it, don’t we Máire?” Bella says, giving her daughter a little tickle while giving her husband a peck on the lips, “Yes, we do.”

As they joined the line to meet Santa, Máire's curious eyes darted around, taking in the sight of other children and the festive decor. The atmosphere buzzed with anticipation, and Malachi mentally prepared for potential meltdowns.

When their turn finally arrived, Bella carefully handed Máire over to the bearded man in red. Santa's warm smile welcomed the little one onto his lap. Malachi observed, practically wincing, ready to intervene at the first sign of distress, to dive in and save his precious little girl from the big scary man in the red suit.

However, to everyone's surprise, Máire's reaction was anything but expected. Instead of tears, screaming or hesitation, she squealed in delight, reaching out with tiny hands to grab Santa's fluffy white beard. Malachi's eyes widened in shock as the unexpected scene unfolded.

Bella laughed joyously, "Well, I guess Máire is making sure Santa's beard is real!"

Santa, accustomed to the unpredictable reactions of little ones, chuckled along. "Looks like we've got a curious one here! Ho, ho, ho!"

Máire, seemingly fascinated by the snowy beard, continued to explore it with her tiny fingers, her blue eyes sparkling with wonder. Malachi, caught between amazement and relief, couldn't help but brightly smile at his daughter's unexpected bravery.

Bella leaned in, capturing the precious moment on her phone. "This is going straight into the baby book. Máire's fearless encounter with Santa's beard!"

As the photographer snapped a picture of the delightful interaction, Santa handed Máire a small plush toy as a memento. Máire, still captivated by the festive surroundings, clutched her new friend with a sense of accomplishment.

The O'Connell family, now with a heartwarming story to share, left Macy's with smiles on their faces. Máire's magical first encounter with Santa had turned a potentially chaotic outing into a cherished memory, proving that sometimes, the most unexpected moments bring the greatest joy during the holiday season.

*~*The Grind for Gold*~*
Wolfslair: NYC

New York City, the city that never sleeps, became the backdrop for Bella Madison's relentless pursuit of greatness besides her home gym. The days following Climax Control leading up to just a week before December 2 Dismember were a whirlwind of preparation, determination, and self-discovery with balancing out her life with Mal and Máire. She never missed time with them but...

Mama was going to work.

Bella's days began with the rising sun, and her nights often ended long after it had set. The city skyline witnessed the dedication etched into every drop of sweat that fell in the Wolfslair gym. Her regimen was rigorous, her focus unparalleled, and the echoes of her determination reverberated through the concrete jungle.

Inside the bustling Wolfslair gym, the echoes of grunts, the clanging of weights, and the occasional thud of bodies hitting the mat filled the air. The training facility, a haven for aspiring wrestlers, housed a unique camaraderie, a melting pot of ambition, sweat, and dreams. Among the dedicated athletes, Bella found herself surrounded by her mentor and confidante, Alicia Lukas, and her mother, Laura Phoenix, a former wrestling star in her own right.

Alicia, who if you didn’t pay any kind of attention to SCW’s past, is a seasoned ring veteran, guided Bella through the intricacies of the squared circle. She had seen it all, tasted victories, endured defeats, and understood the emotional rollercoaster that came with the territory. Under Alicia's watchful eye, Bella pushed her limits, embracing the physical and mental challenges that awaited her in the upcoming championship match.

The three women, each with their own wrestling legacy, spent long hours refining Bella's technique, strategizing, and instilling the unyielding resilience required to climb to the top, which Bella seemed to have in spades. The gym became a sacred space where doubts were confronted, weaknesses turned into strengths, and the fire within Bella blazed brighter than ever.

On this particular evening, after an intense training session, Bella sat on the edge of the ring, wiping the sweat from her brow. The vivid memories of her return match against Bobbie Dahl lingered, but something had shifted within her. The doubts that once clouded her mind were now fueled by a newfound determination, a hunger for success that surpassed her past reservations. Her wins to get to December 2 Dismember only added to that.

Something had changed and it intrigued everyone that she worked with.

Alicia, a mentor and friend, approached, recognizing the internal struggle in Bella's eyes. "You're pushing yourself harder than ever, Bells. Don’t get me wrong, I am loving it. But what's changed?"

Bella looked up, her gaze meeting Alicia's. "I can't let doubt control me anymore. Losing to Bobbie was a wake-up call, a reminder that I can't afford to hold back. Not with everything on the line. After Bobbie, I knew damn well that I had to change the plays in the book and come at it from a different point. If I didn’t, this whole comeback was for nothing and everything that they love to talk about with me would be true. I refuse to leave it as just another day in the office, not when I know damn well that SCW Bombshell’s Title is on the line and how fuckin’ hard Julianna is to beat."

Alicia nodded, understanding the weight of expectations and the pursuit of redemption. "Well kid, you've got the talent, the heart. I've seen it in you from day one. Now, you just need to believe it. Confidence can be your greatest ally."

Bella's mother, Laura sat there as a silent pillar of strength in the background, chimed in, "You've inherited that spirit, Bella, from a lot of us. And while I never want you to forget the lineage you come from, you being under the learning tree of talent like Alicia...well lets just say that I fully believe that you have grown beyond even my expectations. You were born for this but this is a whole new level even for you."

As the hours passed, Bella immersed herself in the grind, sculpting her body, honing her skills, and embracing the ferocity that lay dormant within her. The late nights in the gym, the sweat-soaked training sessions, and the unwavering support of Alicia and her mother shaped her into a force to be reckoned with.

After the exhaustive session, Alicia sat beside Bella on the canvas, a mentor's gaze studying the transformation before her. "You've come a long way, Bells. You've embraced the grind, and it shows. But remember, the biggest battles are fought in the mind. Believe in your journey, trust your instincts."

Bella nodded, the fire in her eyes reflecting a newfound confidence. "I know we are still a while out but I feel like I am ready, Alicia. December 2 Dismember is my stage, and I'm not stepping back. Julianna may be THE challenge, but I'm not holding back anymore, and she’s gonna find herself in the fight for her life."

“Good! Now go home to that husband and baby of yours. Remember to rest and we’ll go again next week.”

Alicia ushered her out and Bella found herself back in her New York City home. The home that both her and Mal had spent so much time and effort converting into a place all their own. Malachi and Máire were sleeping soundly by the time she had gotten home that night, a comforting presence in the midst of the storm within her. Part of her partially kicked herself from missing a night with her daughter but she was doing this all for them.

After giving them both a kiss, she ascended the stairs to the roof, the cool breeze carrying the echoes of the city. Doubts lingered, as they always did and they always will, but after Bobbie, after Seleana and after Krystal....Bella Madison had begun to believe what everyone else was seeing.

It wasn’t a transformation.

It was Bella Madison, leveling up.

*~*Bella Madison's Opus: Movement One*~*
Back to Wolfslair Gym

The air in the Wolfslair Gym hung heavy with the echoes of relentless training and unwavering determination from absolutely anyone that dared entered those doors. Nothing else would be accepted otherwise. Surrounded by the familiar sights and sounds of her sanctuary, Bella Madison, clad in her training wrestling gear, took a moment to address the looming challenge ahead – her showdown with Julianna DiMaria for the SCW Bombshell's Championship.

With a focused gaze and a sense of unfiltered resolve, Bella spoke directly to the one person that she needs, capturing the intensity of her emotions leading up to the anticipated match.

"Julianna, we've been dancing around this for a while now. Your words, your taunts – they don't fall on deaf ears. But let me make one thing crystal clear – the comparisons, the talk about avenging my mother, it's all become noise. Noise that I'm ready to silence, once and for all."

“And I actually want to thank you for making an excellent point after my battle with Krystal, you made it a point to say what everyone needed to say. I beat Krystal for a chance to face you because I wanted it more. I don’t feel like I’m entitled to a fucking thing, ever.” Bella paced the ring, her movements deliberate, each step echoing her determination. "And because of that, I respect you, Julianna, as a champion. You've held that title, defended it, and carved your own path. But don't mistake respect for fear. I'm not here to replicate anyone's legacy, not my mother's, not yours. I'm here to create my own. When I walked in between the ropes back in 2019, I could have easily come in as Bella Phoenix, but instead I did something that I don’t think anyone expected, I came in as ME and that is all that I have needed."

She paused, the intensity in her eyes matching the fire within. "December 17th isn't just a date on the calendar. It's the day that I step into that ring, face you head-on, and prove that I am not defined by the battles my mother fought. I am defined by my own battles, my own victories, my own journey."

Bella's voice resonated with a blend of conviction and passion. "This isn't just about a championship. This is about independence, about breaking free from the shadows that have lingered for too long. I chose the name Bella Madison for a reason – to build my legacy, to stand on my own. And on that night, when we clash in the ring, it won't be about avenging anyone. It'll be about proving that I am a force to be reckoned with, Julianna. It'll be about me, Bella Madison, seizing the moment and making history."

A determined smirk played on her lips. "So, I don’t think it needs to be said but to hell with it... Julianna, you know damn well that you need to bring your A-game. I wouldn't want it any other way. But know this – I'm not stepping into that ring to foil your plans. I'm stepping into that ring to fulfill mine. The SCW Bombshell's Championship – it's not just a title; it's a symbol. I do this for me, for my daughter and for every single person that never gave up on me, when I wanted to give up."

She concluded with a direct stare into the camera. "I'll see you in the ring in Tucson, Julianna. Let the countdown to December 17th begin, because on that night, history will be made, and a new champion will rise."

With that, Bella Madison, fueled by determination, exited the ring, leaving behind a sense of anticipation and the unwavering belief that at December 2 Dismember, she WILL etch her name into the championship's legacy.

[BellaMadison]

~*~ A Moment of Breath~*~

The O’Connell residence buzzed with activity, which lately had been nothing new. Malachi paced in the living room, glancing at the clock every few minutes. He couldn't shake the worry gnawing at him. Bella had been pushing herself relentlessly, dividing her time between family, work, and preparation for her upcoming match at December 2 Dismember. It was as if she was juggling the weight of the world, and Malachi couldn't help but feel the strain himself.

Almost like the whirlwind that she was, she came bursting through the door like a bundle of pure energy. He walked up and she gave him a quick kiss and ran off to check in on Máire real quick before blazing directly into the kitchen.

Mal stood amazed and amused for a moment. He glanced at the kitchen where Bella was sorting through Máire's baby bottles, her expression focused but tinged with exhaustion. The late-night feedings and the demands of motherhood seemed to be taking a toll, yet she soldiered on, determined to be both a loving mother and a fierce and very well prepared competitor.

Malachi took a deep breath, deciding it was time to address his concerns. He stepped into the kitchen, finding Bella meticulously organizing baby formula and baby food on the counter.

"Bells," he began, his voice gentle but filled with worry.

She looked up, a tired smile playing on her lips. "Hey, babe. What's up?"

He crossed his arms, leaning against the kitchen island. "I can't help but notice you've been running on fumes lately. Between taking care of Máire, your training, and everything else, it feels like you're stretching yourself thin. Are you sure you're okay?"

Bella sighed, setting down a bottle. "I'm fine, Mal. I've got everything under control."

Malachi reached out, gently cupping her face. "Mo grá, I know you're strong, and you're capable of handling a lot, but you don't have to do it all. I see the determination in your eyes, and I love that about you, but I also see the fatigue."

She leaned into his touch, closing her eyes briefly. "Mal, December 2 Dismember is a big deal, and less than a few days away. I need to be at my best. I can't afford to take it easy now."

He nodded, understanding her drive but still concerned. "I get that, and I believe in you more than anyone, but I also believe in balance. You're not just a wrestler; you're a mother, a wife. You've got a lot on your plate, and I don't want to see you burn out."

Bella took a deep breath, her shoulders sagging a bit. "I appreciate your concern, Mal. I really do. It's just... I can't help but feel this is my moment. I can't let anything slip through my fingers. Maybe I can fit in a nice mental breakdown after Christmas, you know the perfect time of the year after we pull of the impossible best first Christmas of all time. I just, I don’t want anyone to think I’m slacking and let it just pass me by like every other time."

Malachi smiled, gently kissing her forehead. "Hey, you'll get that moment, Bella. I have no doubt. But I also want you to take care of yourself along the way. Your well-being is just as important as any championship, especially for my sanity and our daughter’s. She feeds off that kind of thing, you know?"

She nodded, a mix of gratitude and determination in her eyes. "I hear you, Mal. I'll take a breather, I promise. Please don’t worry, years of finals in college and those overnight study binges prepared me long ago."

He grinned, pulling her into a reassuring hug. "That's all I ask. We're in this together, remember?"

As they embraced, Malachi couldn't shake the worry entirely, but he hoped his words had resonated. Bella was a force to be reckoned with, but she was also human, vulnerable, and deserving of rest and support.

She broke the silence with a surge of excitement, “OH! Before I forget, I finally figured out what to get dad for Christmas. So we need to keep an eye out for that delivery. Only one left is your mom and maybe something for Miles and Carter, but Miles is impossible to buy for anymore.”

“Bells...the silence? Remember? We were having a moment here.” Mal grumbled.

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to tell you before I forgot.” Bella smirked at her wonderful, caring and grumpy husband.

“Okay, how about this? You leave the bottles alone for the rest of the night, I will draw you and I a hot bath. Máire is pretty much down for the night anyways, but we’ll take the monitor in and you will relax with me. And if anything else pops into your head during all of that, you can text me multiple single line texts for the rest of the week?” he says, with a hopeful look in those beautiful blue eyes that she fell in love with.

“Deal.” Bella sighs, “Go on, I just need to do one thi-” Mal grumbles loudly. “JUST ONE THING! I’ll be right there.”

Mal just rolls his eyes, because there is just no arguing with Bella when she gets her mind set on something and leaves her to finish whatever she may have had in mind. Bella watches him go and pulls her phone from her back pocket and begins to type away and we suddenly hear Mal’s phone go off followed up by a:

“REALLY ELIZABETH?!?!”

“HERE I COME!!!”

Certainly, let's craft a scene involving Bella's sister-in-law Alanah and their best friend Mattie. We'll infuse a touch of Christmas spirit while keeping it lighthearted.



*~*~ A Surprise Intervention ~*~*

It was a crisp winter morning, and Bella had been rushing around the house, preparing for the trip to Tucson for December 2 Dismember. Malachi was at work, Máire was napping, and she thought she had a few hours to organize her thoughts and pack her bags.

Little did she know, her plans were about to take an unexpected turn.

The doorbell rang, and when she opened it, there stood Alanah and Mattie, wearing matching mischievous grins.

"Surprise!" they chimed in unison.

Bella raised an eyebrow, looking between the two of them. "What's going on?"

Alanah stepped forward, holding a festive scarf in her hands. "Well my darling Bella, we've decided you need a break before heading to Tucson. A little Christmas cheer to lift your spirits."

Before Bella could protest, Mattie appeared with a plate of freshly baked gingerbread cookies. "And these are just the beginning. We've planned a surprise day for you."

As they ushered Bella into the living room, the girls’ had taken in the space was transformed into a cozy Christmas haven for Bella and Mal’s first Christmas as a whole family. Twinkling lights adorned the walls, the Christmas tree stood in the corner, and the air was filled with the scent of pine and cinnamon.

“Ok you and Mal did a wonderful job.” Alanah said.

“Well some of it was Spinelli, but Mal was such a huge help too.” Bella couldn't help but smile despite her initial confusion. "Okay, so you got me. What's the plan?"

Alanah handed her the scarf. "First, you need to get into the holiday spirit. We're taking you out, and you're wearing this."

With a playful eye roll, Bella draped the scarf around her neck. "Fine, but I have to be back in a few hours. I need to finish packing."

Mattie winked. "Don't worry, we've got that covered too."

The day unfolded with laughter, festive activities, and quality time with Alanah and Mattie. The Unholy Trinity reunited for a little while at least. They went ice skating at Rockefeller Square, sipped on hot cocoa, and even got some light shopping done. Bella, usually so focused on her responsibilities, found herself letting go of the stress, if only for a few hours.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, they returned back to Bella’s home. The living room had transformed again, this time into a makeshift dressing area. Alanah held up a small garment box.

"So, Mattie and I had a little chat, and we figured you shouldn't be stressing over figuring out what gear you should be packing for the show. So... we took the liberty of brainstorming and of course Mattie and her magic fingers went to work and we brought your gear for the show."

Bella's eyes widened in surprise. "You what?"

Mattie grinned, unwrapping the box to reveal the shimmering attire. "Consider it our Christmas gift to you. Now, go try it on! You've got a fabulous evening ahead and I wanna see this in person before you leave!"

With a mix of gratitude and amusement, Bella changed into her wrestling gear, feeling a renewed sense of energy and camaraderie. Mattie Cormier strikes again along with a matching ring jacket that would bring out the holiday spirit even in the gloomiest of grumps.

And yes, Malachi approved wholeheartedly.

As they headed out for the evening, Bella couldn't help but think that sometimes, the best surprises come when you least expect them.


~*~Bella Madison’s Opus: Movement Two~*~

It was one of those nights at the O’Connell House, Máire had stubbornly refused to go down for the night until she got to hear her daddy sing her to sleep. Since she has finally learned to roll over, keeping her, Luka AND Salem away from the tree has turned into a full-time chore.

Bella had spent the entire week, when she wasn’t being kept super busy with Máire, watching matches, promos and more so the ONE that Julianna had left for her personally.

The more she heard it, the more it reminded her of a record that had a scratch in it and just skipped on one particular part over and over and over again.

Now for those that don’t know, Bella is a collector. She loves to collect books, both old and new and she also has a particular love of music. One that she had garnered from her parents. Both Laura and Nick had an extensive music library and it had seemingly rubbed off on her. Malachi also had a pretty impressive collection. So years ago, when they moved in together and his stuff combined with her’s, the collection had become even more impressive. And as funny as that may have seemed, she sat in an overstuffed chair in their living room, next to a refurbished record player that was playing one her favorite records, that she had had for years, and that seemed to have caught a skip in of itself.

‘I’ll be the best...or nothing at all.’

That’s where it repeated multiple times before she sighed and reached over and lifted the arm and looked at the now busted record.

“Well, that’s something else that can be easily replaced.”

She slid it back into its sleeve and sat it off to the side before she just sat back and enjoyed the temporary peace and quiet but she could feel it coming so...let’s let it out.

“Julianna, it's cute that you spent so much time trying to dissect my SCW career and question my motivations. I appreciate the effort you put into that little desert promo of yours. But, sweetie, let me enlighten you.”

Bella leaned forward, her eyes focused on an imaginary Julianna across the room, as if she were speaking directly to her adversary.

“You say I'm not ready? That I question my own worth? Funny how you conveniently pick and choose moments from my career to fit your narrative. You want to talk about my return match against Bobbie Dahl? Fine, let's talk about it. It was a wake-up call, a moment of self-reflection. But what you failed to grasp is that it ignited a fire within me, a fire that's been burning brighter with every match since.”

Bella's tone grew more assertive, her words carrying the weight of determination.

“You want to question my legitimacy as a contender? Let's look at your logic. Seleana and Krystal, according to you, are no longer main event contenders. So, by beating them, what does that make me? An afterthought? A stepping stone? No, Julianna. It makes me the next in line, the one who stepped up when others faltered.”

She raised an eyebrow, challenging Julianna's assessment with a confident smirk.

“You've got this obsession with titles and accolades. You want me to name a time I was a Blast from the Past finalist? Well, let me tell you, I'm not defined by a single tournament or a missed opportunity. But to simplify it for you, I never have been. Doesn’t mean that I can’t but I just haven’t. At least, not yet.”

Bella shrugged off the dismissive tone of Julianna's critique, embracing her own journey with a sense of pride.

“You scoff at my mixed tag team title win with Sass N Bash, dismissing it as if it's irrelevant. But let me remind you, that win represented unity with my husband, and the essence of what professional wrestling should be about. It's not just about championships; it's about the moments that resonate with the fans and within you.”

Her gaze softened, reflecting on the cherished memories intertwined with her wrestling career.

“And yes, you're right; I haven't won a singles championship in SCW. Yet. But that does not and will not ever define me. What defines me is my ability to learn, adapt, and keep pushing forward. I'm not stuck in the past, Julianna. I'm evolving.”

Bella's expression turned resolute, a quiet determination emanating from her as she addressed Julianna's critiques.

“As for your little contender's tournament rant, let me clarify. I earned my spot by defeating Seleana and Krystal, two formidable opponents. It's not about who should have been there; it's about who proved themselves in the ring. And that, my dear, when the dust settled, is me.”

She held a metaphorical mic, emphasizing her point with a rhetorical flourish.

“Now, let's talk about motivation. You question what drives me? It's not about proving you wrong or making anyone proud. It's about my passion for this business, my hunger to leave a mark, and yes, being a proud mother adds to that motivation. I fight for myself, my family, and the fans who believe in me.”

Bella's eyes glinted with a fierce determination, channeling her inner fire into her words.

“Your motivation, on the other hand, seems to be centered around making grand statements, asserting yourself as the alpha, and proving something to yourself. That's all well and good, but championships are earned in the ring, not just through words in a desert. You screamed into the void, en masse, about how you are the only deserving Bombshell on the roster to be the SCW Bombshell World Champion when in fact, I feel like you are trying to convince yourself more than anyone else.”

Her words cut through the hypothetical distance, challenging Julianna's self-assured narrative.

“So, Julianna, you can keep questioning my motivations and trying to diminish my accomplishments, but come December 17th, in that ring in Tucson, actions will speak louder than words. I'll prove that I'm not just ready; I'm destined to be the SCW Bombshell's Champion. As for that glass slipper? Save it for your fairy tales. I’m not some damsel in distress who needs people to save me. In fact, I am quite particularly fond of doing this moment in my journey all on my own. Yes, I have Mal, Máire, Mom, Alicia and the whole Wolfslair behind me. But in reality, it's the championship gold that will be shining on my shoulder when it's all said and done.”

She concluded with a confident nod, the imaginary confrontation in her mind leaving her prepared for the challenge ahead.

[Julianna DiMaria]

November 26

When I got back to the hotel, I realized that there was a piece of my defense against Mercedes Vargas that was fuzzy to me. But luckily, someone in the truck was nice enough to provide me the tape of the match.

I was feeling a little relief that I had won, of course, because in my book, I had erased the asterisk that came with my title defense against Courtney. I found the video of my match in my cloud storage that the production guy had sent it to.

“My first title defense with no nonsense…” I thought to myself with a smile. I fast forwarded through most of the match considering I had remembered what had happened but when I got to a part that was fuzzy to me, I stopped and played it at normal speed.

And there it was…

The Harper Mason bullshit…

My heart sank harder than the Titanic in that moment…

“No…” I thought to myself, feeling numb and cold. “...not again…”

I wanted to break stuff in my room. I wanted to scream. I wanted to be as angry as I could possibly be but I held myself together to prevent that. Sadly, I not enough to prevent the doubts from seeping in knowing that my father would’ve been disappointed in this too. Then for the first time in my SCW career, I started to have my doubts…

“Am I a fraud?” I asked myself in my head. “That’s TWO title defenses that are questionable now! TWO STAINED by interference! The first one, at least I could say that I would’ve won anyway with High Stakes to back it up. But THIS ONE?”

I was frozen with massive disappointment. Seeing Mercedes tap out didn’t make me happy. My anger was giving away to sadness at this point. I could just hear my father calling me a ‘horrible champion’. I could feel the disappointment from the grave. But when I realized the interference wasn’t even the worst part, that’s when my nerves started to go numb… so numb that I was starting to have a hard time breathing.

“...the worst part is the match shouldn’t have even been that close… but it WAS! I was THAT close to having EVERYTHING be shattered… BY FUCKING MERCEDES VARGAS OF ALL PEOPLE!!!!!!”

My breath felt shorter as I sat in a corner of the room, definitely triggered by that. In my mind, Mercedes is an opponent that I SHOULD’VE been able to put away rather easily but the fact that it was even close AT ALL was playing tricks with my mind. I really wanted to bury my face in shame.

“What kind of champion am I?” I asked myself. “One that needs help to retain? One that wrestles down to opponents that have sometimes resulted in losses to people I should be winning against in spades… and it ALMOST happened tonight? What is WRONG WITH ME? Why was that match even CLOSE? WHY? Why do I ALWAYS have this pattern happen to me? Why is it that when I attain success, I come close to folding like a stack of cards before I do so? This is UNACCEPTABLE… EMBARRASSING! I can’t have this… I can’t deal with this…”

I almost fainted in that moment when I realized my anxiety had been strongly triggered.

“...I need to calm down and understand what it’s going to take to get through this. WHY can’t I handle success well? WHY? There’s only one person I know that would understand…”

I calmed down enough to pull my phone out of my pocket and dial the number that I needed. In my mind, I was hoping they’d pick up. My heart jumped when they did.

“Hello? Dr. Montgomery… hi…” I said to my former therapist. “...I’m… I’m not doing so well… I just had a panic attack… yes over the match I just had… if we can just have a session…”

I breathed a sigh of relief when I was told this would happen. But on a night like this? A night that was more embarrassing for me than it was something to gloat about by far… it was the only thing about this night that I could be positive about.

All I could think about for a while was how I HAD to be better…

Otherwise, my title reign wasn’t going to last much longer…

A week later…

Dr. Montgomery’s office.

Session in progress.

I had already explained to him the gist of my situation with the two title defenses that I’ve had so far and how they have gotten me down along with my frustration with my career long pattern of ‘wrestling down’ to people and suffering upset losses as a result.

I knew Bella was my challenger by this point… and that worried me…

Not because I felt threatened by Bella… but because Bella is the perfect example of the type of wrestler I once suffered upset loses to on a regular basis.

“For starters, Julianna…” Dr. Montgomery explained. “...you went into that defense against Mercedes already down on yourself over what happened with Courtney. That’s not good.”

I nodded, agreeing.

“You have, what I like to call… ‘success anxiety’...”

“What? That’s so… confusing…”

“You remember why we met in the first place, correct?”

“How could I not? My career and my life were in shambles in 2018. For the life of me, I was going in circles and was completely lost…”

“The early part of your career was cruel to you…” Dr. Montgomery reminds me. “You weren’t mentally there. You let the spotlight get to your head. People in wrestling saw you as a joke because you’d lose plenty and you were a walking punchline on social media with all the trolling you used to do… and these upset losses you used to have so much? It made you feel like the perennial stepping stone to other people…”

“You got that right…” I said with a sigh, not wanting to remember that awful part of my career. “I’ve never really been able to enjoy my success since then, honestly. Here I am thinking ‘what if I fuck up against Bella the way I did against Mercedes?’. It’s very possible…”

“Don’t overthink it, Julianna. That’s the ‘success anxiety’ right there. You worry far too much about falling back into what you were that you can never enjoy your success and everything has to be perfect. That’s why something off like these interferences during your defenses happen and you’re having panic attacks over it. You worry too much about suffering an upset loss that you basically numb yourself into a self-fulfilling prophecy. You almost did it against Mercedes…”

“And I CAN’T afford to play with that fire again with Bella…” I admitted. “I don’t get myself. When I’m chasing a title, it’s smooth sailing but every time I’m the one defending, it’s like this TRIGGER hits where I’m worrying so much about failing and the worst part is, I brought it on myself. The first couple of years, I didn’t take this too seriously and I even regret that I was so young and stupid back then. You’re right…”

I paused to sigh, lamenting that I was so stupid and allowed myself to go through so much shit that it was still affecting me in the worst ways… even now. A part of me even wanted to laugh or cry at the fact that I just might be the most insecure, undefeated world champion in wrestling history… or at least that’s how I was feeling in the moment.

“What you just described is exactly why I’m a perfectionist and why those two defenses have gotten to me.”


“Perhaps you should consider letting out what you’ve been holding in for years…” Dr. Montgomery advises. “You should face what you were before and let out some of that anxiety. For your sake, you should also celebrate and be happier with your successes a little more instead of worrying about the fall that hasn’t even happened yet and… in my opinion based on how you’ve been in SCW so far? Won’t even happen for a hell of a long time if you’re able to keep your head straight.”

“Thanks…” I said with a bit of a relieved sigh. At that point, I was wondering what I had to do to face this and overcome my “success anxiety”...

December 13

I was at home in my living room, journal in hand, and I was angry as I was staring across the wall. There was a poster of me from five years ago wearing an “#OFFLINE” t-shirt in reference to a horribly stupid trend I used to do as a rookie when I would “troll and run” from people on Twitter like I was the prototype version of Hayley Halsey.

“To my former self in 2018…I HATE YOU…” I wrote to my younger self as my anger flowed through me. “WHY did you have to be so STUPID? WHY did you take your career for granted? WHY did you always allow yourself to be a FUCKING LAUGHINGSTOCK? WHY WERE YOU SO FUCKING WEAK? You were NEVER going to be good enough to be a world champion because being popular on social media and ‘owning’ people on Twitter with your stupid bullshit while your wrestling skills were being overshadowed and while wrestlers worse than you were always beating you meant more to you than your fucking craft! You never came CLOSE to a world title! You cared more about carrying on your father’s legacy than doing anything worthwhile for yourself. YOU! ARE! PATHETIC! YOU! ARE! NOTHING!

You are… my former self… an insipid, immature, dunce-minded weakling who had no fucking idea what it took to be a champion and being the dead weight you are, you STILL seep through… just like you did in that match against Mercedes. You are WEAKLING TRASH! For five years, all I’ve ever done is rebuilt from your GARBAGE! You are WEAK because you allowed your obsession with making your parents happy break you like you did and you CONSTANTLY suffered STUPID losses to wrestlers that I, on paper, would beat in my sleep!”

My eyes narrowed with disgust as I continued to look at that poster of my younger self. I was so angry I even picked up the SCW Bombshells World Championship and through it right at the poster. It fell face down on the floor and I continued to unleash my anger.

“It’s because of your former existence that I question whether I even deserve to have the title that I do now. I’ve done nothing but succeed in SPITE of you. The best way I can move on from my ‘success anxiety’ is to get rid of you completely and act like the early part of my career never happened….”

I paused for a moment before I wrote more… and even began to say out loud what I was writing…

“I hate you so much… I! HATE! YOU! SO! MUCH!

I could NEVER appreciate you… vapid, trashy, overgrown child… AKA myself at the age of 23 going on 24… being so naive and so moronic and so substandard compared to what I am today…

You’re a distant memory, younger self… you should stay that way.

Because all you are to me now is a reminder of a horrible time in my life I reject and want nothing to do with…”

“JULIANNA?” I heard my mother say as she walked in. Her jaw dropped in shock as she saw the scene. I was startled as she sat down next to me. “What are you doing?”

I said nothing, shoving my journal into her hands. She read it and I saw her face change from concerned to outright sad.

“...this is how you feel about yourself?” she said with the disappointment clearly in her voice.

“Who I used to be…”

“Honey, your younger self is still you…”

“You’ve taken your medicine right? I can take care of myself…”

“Julianna, it’s time for me to take care of you for a change. I appreciate what you’ve done for me during my cancer episode and why is the title on the floor like that?”

My mother sighs as she goes over to grab it. She hands it to me, but I pushed it away.

“I really don’t know if I deserve that right now. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Julianna, five years ago, you were still a growing young lady. You didn’t have the knowledge or the experience back then to be what you are now. Here, take the belt…”

“No…” I said, rejecting it. “After my two defenses… after that second one… MERCEDES of all people… what if I lose it to Bella and I go BACK to what I was five years ago…”

“You have matured far too much as a person to ever fall into that hole again…”

“But those two defenses…”

“Honey, move forward…”

“They make my anxiety worse, mother…”

My mother listens at that point while my eyes started to water.

“It’s really made me doubt myself as a champion honestly. I don’t know if I can handle this with the panic attack I had back in Tempe. #JulesInSix might be a trendy hashtag, but this whole thing with the world title happened so damn fast…”

“Listen honey, we all start from somewhere and that person from 5 years ago was YOUR starting point. I want to remind you that when you won this title, you said it was OUR title and I’m sticking with that. Now, you need to pull yourself together. What happened in those two defenses wasn’t your fault. If you want to overcome this, you need to remind yourself of what made you as strong as you are now. You’re in the spot that you’re in because the company feels you deserve to be there and there’s not a damn person on the roster that can take that away from you. You got thrown into the fire and your first two defenses weren’t how you wanted them to go with the interferences. I get that. But as the saying goes, it’s not how you start, it’s how you finish. I promise you that by the time your reign is over, nobody will even be talking about those two defenses. In fact, Bella didn’t even mention them at all…”

My mother wraps an arm around me, which was enough to prevent a crying fit from me. She even takes the letter I wrote to my younger self, tore it out of my notebook and ripped it to shreds.

“You don’t need that. You need to treat yourself better. You haven’t been that person in years and you never will be again. Don’t be so hard on that person. After all, she had to exist to evolve into the champion you have become…”

I soaked in my mother’s words for a minute before I started to understand.

“That must have been one amazingly strong person if she endured all the abuse she had happen to hear in the early years of her career to evolve into who I am today…”

“See?” my mother says with a smile. “Now you’re getting it. Anything awful that happened before? Forget it. Anything before SCW? Even those two title defenses you just had? Forget all of it. None of that matters, honey. What happened before doesn’t determine whether you beat Bella or not.”

“Thank you…” I said, feeling blessed that I had such a patient and caring mother. “I understand that I need to start treating myself better and giving myself more credit for my successes than beating myself up for my failures…”

My mother was beginning to tell me a story of what happened with her when she was in a similar situation and it helped me feel tons better. The overthinking, anxiety and mental downward spiral had stopped in this moment… and I KNEW deep down this was the turning point that was going to push me toward beating Bella and beginning to overcome my ‘success anxiety’...

December 15

I was in a lobby, camera turned on, pointing toward me, and a grandfather’s clock ticking. The lights were dim and I was a hell of a motivated champion with the realization that I finally knew what I had to do in order to quit being my own worst enemy. Thinking back to Bella’s brief speech coming into this night, I wasn’t worried or even intimidated. I was more amused… and that was what I was going to express to begin my final thoughts..;.

“Oh Cinderbella…

So valiant…

So brave…

Too bad for you it won’t be enough. Thank you for showing me how much of a fragile little flower you truly are on the inside. I mean for god’s sake, woman. I haven’t mentioned your mother in weeks and you still decided that you were going to go off about that. You really took a comment that was honestly a bait comment more than anything and you really jammed it so far up your ass. I knew what I was in for when you opened your speech with that and boy was I ever right. I had a feeling you’d come in trying to express a false bravado and I was waiting for you to slip up and contradict yourself and you DID NOT DISAPPOINT! One minute, you’re talking about how you came in as YOU and how you didn’t need to be Bella Phoenix and you’re hinting that you came in as an independent person from all that but the next minute… what the fuck do you do?

Oh, you’re talking about how this is about independence and breaking free from the shadows that have held you down and how this is about standing on your own…”

I scoff with amusement.

“You know you just gave away why you’re losing right? Because what you just proved to me contradicting yourself in that fashion is that you DON’T know exactly who you want to be just yet! You have a general IDEA of who you want to be, but that idea is little more than a WISH! You WISH to be independent! You WISH to create your own legacy! You WISH to break free from your mother’s legacy so bad and WISH to break free from the shadows that have held you down. Bella, have you ever heard the saying that a wish is a goal without a plan? WHAT exactly is your plan to accomplish what you want to be? Winning my championship? That’s not going to happen. I WANT to admire your guts and your courage and your desire to do all that. As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a second generation wrestler and can even relate to what you are saying. Yeah, the weight of a parental legacy is daunting. The shadows that make you insecure? Those are fucking daunting. In a perfect world with all the parallels between us, we might even be best friends and exchange legacy stories or something, but what you are showing me, Cinder-Bella, is that you’re STILL just a damn dreamer. Beating Seleana and Krystal, a has-been and someone that will never be a World Champion in SCW, is NOT going to change that. You know what IS going to change that? Actually KNOWING who you want to be instead of “having an idea”.

I want to tell you a story about me, Cinderbella… and this is real life, not the fairy tale you want to live.

Like you? I had those lingering shadows. My father? His emotional abuse toward me? The fact that he even called me a “switch hitting deviant” in reference to my bisexuality for instance? The insecurities I had in me that were caused by that man… I can go on all day about them. The first couple of years of my mainstream career? The perception people had of me as a joke that wasn’t motivated enough to be anything in this business? Yeah, those weighed down my career for a LONG time. I allowed those shadows to control me and be far less than the best version of myself and as a result, I even put my career in the hole until my mother got kidney cancer the first time and that’s when I woke the fuck up and realized I had to do something with my life and be BETTER!

You know what I did, Bella? I CHANGED! I trained harder… and differently. I approached the business far more seriously than I did before. I refined my game. I reinvented myself. I set out to ERASE the perception I had in this business as a joke and a second gen failure. I didn’t just SAY I was going to do it the way YOU do… I FUCKING DID IT… and I didn’t do it by beating stale cupcakes and brownie batter like you have… I did it facing the best of the fucking BEST of the competition those companies had to offer and focusing on MY improvement…

YOU focus on breaking away from the past…

I focus on doing whatever I have to do to be BETTER every single day even if I sometimes have to face the past in order to do that…

YOU drown yourself in the shadows that you are so desperate to break away from… you’re happy being stuck there because you’re not good enough to have any other motivation other than those lingering shadows.

Me? I face them. I conquer them. I move FORWARD! You are attempting to do the same thing that I did years ago before I came to SCW but the biggest difference between you and I is that while you are a DREAMER, I am a DOER! I was so meticulous in my plan to break from what was holding me down I even wrote out how I was going to do it, what titles I was going to win along the way, how I was going to change myself to be better, and all of that.

And I look at you and aside from maybe being ‘more aggressive’, I still see the same old Bella from her pre-pregnancy run between the ropes. If you REALLY wanted to change… if you REALLY had a plan to be better… you take ACTION…

You don’t continue to hang with Wolfslair and train with them. You go to another fucking wrestling gym and gain another perspective on how to approach your craft. Hell, I’ll even advocate for wrestling in another country or even in another stateside promotion altogether so you can get a variety of experiences that will help you be better, you don’t stay stuck in your comfort zone and just face the same old shit over and over again.

Having a plan to be better isn’t having the same old, boring mindset of ‘it’s about proving that I am a force to be reckoned with’...

Fuck outta here!

That’s a LOSER mindset, Bella… that’s why you’ve never been able to win a singles championship here because you’ve had that mindset for your entire career and that’s yet another crack in this wannabe armor that you have been trying to show when you’re going around acting like you’re a better Bella than you were before. ‘It’s about proving myself’ is what a DREAMER, someone who has NO PLAN to get to where they want to be, does…

And that’s why DREAMERS in this business ultimately DON’T get to where they want to be.

The attitude of a champion isn’t ‘it’s about proving myself’, it’s ‘I KNOW I have proven myself and I’m about to fucking show it when I take the next step toward the goal I want to achieve’.

THAT’S what you are missing, Cinderbella… and compared to me, you’re missing it in spades and that’s without mentioning that saying that it’s about proving yourself as a force to be reckoned with is literally the WORST thing you can say when you’ve been here as long as you have because… well… think about it.

If NOW, you’re saying that it’s about proving yourself, then what about the last four fucking years huh? So does this mean that you HAVEN’T proven yourself at all these last four years? Because at the end of the day, Cinderbella, you don’t become a world champion if you never prove yourself and often those that don’t, don’t even get a chance to and I don’t need to repeat myself on how exactly you got here, do I? When I came in here at first? Yeah, I knew I had to prove myself because I was in a new company. I knew that when I had that shot at High Stakes, I had to earn it because I didn’t exactly win a match to get it. Had I lost to Ariana, she would’ve merely been added. But I NEVER felt like I had to prove myself because I TRUSTED in my abilities from the very beginning. I admit that I’ve had a moment to myself in private here and there, but I’ve always been able to string myself together. I came in with the mindset that when I came to Sin City Wrestling, I was going to be the Bombshells World Champion and sure enough, that’s exactly what I accomplished even though I didn’t think I’d get to this point as fast as I did.

I heard ALL the hype about Courtney Pierce when I walked in here. When I found out I had a shot against her, all I heard was Courtney this, Courtney that but while I heard it, I didn’t LISTEN. No matter what anyone said, especially her, I KNEW I was going to beat her and not once did I ever feel like I needed to prove a damn thing to her. YOU feel like you need to prove yourself to your opponents while I don’t drag myself down doing that. My focus wasn’t proving myself to Courtney, it was ending her dominance, ending her reign and taking that fucking torch from her and at High Stakes, that’s exactly what I fucking did! If there was ONE thing I could change about my career in Sin City Wrestling so far it’s the fucking bullshit interference both of my title defenses up to this point have had but even that? While I admit I was letting it get to me for a while, I got my shit together and I put it behind me.

DOERS are able to put the undesirable moments behind them, even if sometimes, it takes longer to do so.

DREAMERS? They dwell on those undesirable moments, hold onto them, and use them for motivation thinking that it’s going to get them to where it wants to be and then starting the whole fucking cycle all over again when they continue to add undesirable moments. You really are, Cinderbella, in a toxic cycle within yourself that you don’t seem to realize just yet. Perhaps when you FINALLY understand the difference between a wish and a goal, when you realize how to be a doer and not a dreamer, you may be a champion on your own.

But you currently don’t understand any of that…

And that’s why against someone who GETS IT, someone who has been in your shoes before, someone who managed to fight and overcome what you are going through right now and did so in a MUCH BETTER way then you are doing so at the moment, you’re NOT going to win.

You’re NOT going to beat me… unless I beat myself…

And while I admit I ALMOST did that in my last defense, I’ve learned my fucking lesson and I’m NOT going to be weighed down by the disappointment of my two defenses so far. This third defense WILL be the charm for me and as much as I don’t hate you, as much as I actually kind of WANT to see you succeed here because of how we relate on that “second gen thing”, I HAVE to make an example out of you. I WILL further cement the dominance that I have in this company as the SCW Bombshells World Champion and you can take what happens in that ring on Sunday one of two ways…

You can take it as a setback… you can go back to the drawing board… you can whine and cry just like you did after the Bobbie loss while you admit that you questioned yourself after that… and you can wonder what’s next for poor, naive, dreamer Cinderbella…

OR…

You can take this loss that is coming your way as a LESSON… you can take the time to understand first hand why I am the success I have been in my career and why I’ve clicked so fucking quickly in this company… and you can finally stop being a dreamer and start being a DOER…

So what’s this loss going to be for you? A setback? Or a lesson?

The choice is yours after I FINALLY have a no bullshit title defense…”

I was interrupted briefly by the sudden chime of the grandfather clock behind me, signifying it was now the top of the hour.

“It’s not quite midnight yet, Cinderbella…

But this Sunday?

It will be!

Henceforth ends what I hope is a future building lesson for you…”

With that, I scoff and make my way out of the lobby, shutting off the camera along the way.