[Despayre]

 Fourteen years ago...

"Rowan,

I can't believe it's taken me this long to manage to find you. There's something I need to tell you, but I don't have the time to do it the way I want. I'm taking enough of a risk getting this to you, so I have to break it to you the hard way.

There's a reason father packed us up to move back to Canada. it wasn't just because he wanted to get me away from you. Rowan, it was because he found out that I was pregnant. I am so sorry for breaking it to you like this. I didn't even know until the symptoms started to show. Father was furious, and tried to force me to get thew baby aborted but that was the first time in living memory mother stood up to him and put her foot down. She would not hear of it. So I kept the baby and I am happy that I did. I included his picture. His name is Joshua.

Margaret"

Synn remembered that letter only too easily from almost fifteen years in the past. He pulled the small school photograph out of the envelope and looked at it, and he could immediately see himself in the small, five-year old boy. He knew there was no point in trying to deny the link between them as father and son. The facial features, the same unkempt hair that could not be tamed... this boy was his son. Everything he knew and believed, was now in jeopardy. His stomach twisted into violent knots and Synn did something he had not done since he was a small child -- he lurched over and vomited up the contents of his stomach.

One year later....

"Rowan,

This is Ellen, Margaret's mother. There was an accident. Margaret was driving down the road on her way home when she was in a bad car wreck. She's in the hospital in serious condition, but ... I'm sure you know the truth, Rowan. He is in far worse shape. The doctors said he suffered severe head trauma and he is undergoing surgery to remove fluid that is building up around his brain. I can't tell you where he is being treated. Margaret's father wouldn't let you anywhere near the boy, even if I did. I can promise you though that I'll keep you updated as soon as I know anything. I know you are not  a believer, but this is your son. Pray for him.

Ellen"

If Synn had felt his stomach hit his feet when he first learned of this boy, it was nothing compared to the helpless feeling he was experiencing, knowing that his own child, a son he had seen only in a photograph, was now fighting for his life in some hospital in Canada. He had never before felt as helpless as he did that day. He could try to find him. Search for him by name, but there were hundreds of hospitals throughout the country of Canada. He was not even certain he could, or should, send a reply for fear of bringing the wrath of Margaret's father down on her and her mother's heads. At this point, he didn't really care on that particular end result. But the boy could suffer the impending whiplash effect.

He hated this helpless feeling. It was foreign to him. Alien. God help the boy's bastard grandfather is he ever found him.

Three years ago.....

"The place is called Broodmoore Mental facilities and Treatment. Rowan, Synn, whatever you want to be called. Please! You have to get him out of there! I had no idea what sort of place it was when Russel convinced us that it was for the boy's best interests! Please, you have to believe me! Now that Russel is dead, I have tried everything to get him out of there but you know the connections he had. Even in death that man has influence I can't get past. But you can. I know you can. I've heard enough of some of the things that you've accomplished. Please. He's been in that hellish place for years now and I haven't been able to even visit him! The things I've heard they do to the patients there... it sickens me. Joshua was getting worse, not better, all the years he was growing up after the accident. Screaming, crying, violent outbursts. Doctors told us there was nothing they could do outside of constant sedation. That's when his grandfather sent him to Broodmoore. Progressive treatments he called it! They torture that poor boy! Rowan, please. If he means anything to you, help him!

And he did. Synn would wait no longer to take charge of this situation. His only wish was that the bastard still lived so he could see everything unravel before his very eyes. Now Synn was the one with contacts, more so than Joshua's grandfather had to intervene against his wishes to aid the boy ... his son. So many people expressed their disdain to him, saying that Synn was heartless. Without remorse or a care in the world. They were wrong. He was wrong. He had believed the very same thing about himself.

That is until that day when the doctor opened that door and Synn looked into the gray eyes of the seventeen year old boy who was his son.

Current...
Las Vegas, Nevada...
2:13 AM

Synn stood at the glass patio door of his homestead here in the City of Sin, looking out at the spacious backyard. The estate was one he bought for the sole reason of having a real home in which to raise Joshua aka Despayre. His son. His eyes were lost on the pool, the picnic area, the manicured lawn and the other houses in the distance. His mind wandered to a gift given to Despayre just this past Christmas. A hand crafted sweater with a teddy bear stitched on the front, and a note that told Despayre his mother was still out there somewhere.

Then, just a week ago, another present was delivered to the SCW offices. This time it was a small outfit purchased at the Build-A-Bear store, intended obviously for Despayre's teddy bear companion, Angel. It too, was signed by his mother.

Synn swore to himself a private vow that this bitch who stowed her child away as an inconvenience would never again have anything to do with him. He promised himself that the day Despayre finally gained his freedom from Broodmoore and came with him, a silent but tenuous relationship starting between the two. He did not want her contacting him, not even simply to look upon him. He believed with every fiber of his being that she lost all rights to him when she gave him up to a doctor's so-called care. Everything had been going so well.

Synn turned away from the glass door and allowed the shades to fall back into place, preventing any outside eyes from seeing within the house if they made the attempt. Silently he walked into the kitchen and pulled open a cabinet door, and removed a small glass. He then walked over to the freezer and opened it to remove a half-empty bottle of Scotch. Walking back to the small island counter, he sett the glass down and popped the cap off of the bottle and poured the contents into the glass. Setting the bottle down, he lifted the glass and swallowed nearly half its contents before setting it back down. He sighed, his glare aimed at nothing in particular.

Everything he had accomplished over the past three plus years now seemed to be slowly unraveling beyond his control. Despayre did not even seem to remember that his mother had put him away in the first place. It was almost like his mind was lost somewhere in time, still as much a child as he was in that photograph. It was as if, at least in Despayre's mind,time simply stopped from the moment he entered Broodmoore, and the moment he walked out.

Synn believed human emotion was for the weak, yet over the years that theory was sorely tested. he grew to care for the men and women he led into his stable of Sins. He met a man by the name of Sean Williams and never dared believe that the spark of love would actually threaten to grow into a roaring flame the way it had. But all of those emotions paled when compared to the feeling he had when he would look at Despayre and think to himself ... "That's my son." He yet held true to his core beliefs, but he knew that to deny change was futile.

Exhaling sharply, Synn looked down at pulled out a small drawer in the counter and removed a back of opened cigarettes and a lighter. Shaking one loose, he slipped the cigarette from the package and between his lips where he lit it. He took a light drag and exhaled a thin, plume of smoke when a voice emanated from behind him.

"I'm telling Teresa."

Synn almost choked from the surprise as he had not heard anyone approach him from behind. He was not one easily startled but he turned around and found a sleepy looking Despayre standing in the kitchen doorway, dressed in a t-shirt and pajama pants, and of course, clutching Angel close to his chest. There were times Synn would wonder if that teddy bear was surgically grafted to the boy but it was not a miracle he would deny. That bear did more for Despayre than any doctor could hope to accomplish.

He took a step into the kitchen, watching the cigarette in Synn's hands with a frown and his nose wrinkled. He said, "You said you quit."

"What are you doing up?" Synn said, choosing to ignore the accusation, reaching over to a glass dish to flick the ash into before turning around to watch the boy fully approach the counter. "You were supposed to be in bed."

"So were you." Despayre responded, raising his eyes from the cigarette and into Synn's eyes.

Synn mumbled, "I couldn't sleep." Before he picked up his glass of Scotch and had another drink.

Despayre sighed as he set Angel down on the counter carefully. He said, "Me neither." As he turned around and went to the cabinet and pulled out a tall glass. He then walked to the fridge and pulled it open, fishing around before stepping back with a quart of chocolate milk. He brought it over to the counter and continued, "Had dreams."

Synn watched silently as Despayre set the glass down on the marble counter top and used both hands to carefully pour the contents. A smirk crossed Synn's lips as he remembered the light scolding his housekeeper gave Despayre for recklessly pouring a glass for himself a week ago and spilling it all over her clean kitchen. It was not a mistake the boy cared to repeat.

As Despayre pulled up a stool to join him, Synn finally said, "Your own fault. I warned you about watching the movie 'Predators' with Teresa before bed."

"Angel said he knew those things." Despayre answered simply as if that was all the answer needed. "Owed them money or something." Despayre glanced up and leaned over the counter to emphasise. "I couldn't let him watch alone!"

"No, no I suppose you couldn't." Synn went to take another puff and saw the frown again on Despayre's face, focusing intently on the cigarette in his fingers.

"Why are you smoking again?" Despayre asked as he brought his eyes up again, but this time only briefly and returning them to the 'cancer stick'.

Synn exhaled gently through his nose and set the cigarette in the glass dish without taking a drag and said, "I've had a lot on my mind."

Despayre pulls his chair closer to Synn's edge of the counter and draws Angel over, draping the teddy bear in his left arm. His eyes showed concern for the man and he asked, "Is it Sean?"

"Sean?" Synn looked up at the young man who had his hands clasped between his knees, watching him. "Sean ... Williams?"

Despayre nodded, "Yeah. You know, your boyfriend?"

"Boyfriend." Synn smiled. He wasn't sure if that was exactly accurate in description. Sean didn't seem too open about what he felt or how he wanted things to progress between them, or even if he did at all. The two would have to have a long talk at the earliest possible convenience. Synn didn't notice that Despayre was now a hair's width away from his own face and he looked up and Despayre had the goofiest grin plastered on his mug that he could possibly manage.

"Do you LIKE him!?" Despayre teased and Synn had to choke back the laugh that came to his lips.

"Yes, Joshua." Synn nodded in conformation. "I like him very much."

"Me too." Despayre nodded. "Is he my new mommy?"

That made Synn look up sharply and Despayre was just leaning on the counter with his face in his hands, smiling. Before Synn could answer the quirky natured question, Despayre asked another. "Is it our match?"

"Your match?"

Despayre nodded, "Yeah. The fact we're wrestling Sean?"

"No." Synn answered, shaking his head in the negative. "Sean knows this is business, as well as you and Gabriel are aware. Although his actions against rage didn't endear him to the others."

Despayre asked, "Are you worried we'll lose?"

Synn smirked as he reached for his glass and he said, "Of course not." He took the last swallow of Scotch and set the glass down, but before he could reach for the bottle to refill it, Despayre nudged it away from his reach. Synn blinked back his surprise at the action and Despayre whispered, "Drinking is bad for you. You said so yourself."

"Bad for you, Joshua." Synn retorted. "You're on medications."

"Gabriel said you should be."

"Did he now?" Synn smirked, raising an eyebrow. "I appreciate you letting me know that."

Despayre just watched him for a few seconds and piped up once again, "Is it that weird gray hair on the back of your head?"

"What?" Synn frowned and turned his head around, "I don't have a weird gray-OW!"

Synn yelped and swerved back around, holding the back of his head and massaging it, watching as Despayre was closely inspecting the hair between his fingers.

"Joshua..." Synn started in a warning tone. "How would you like it if I did that to you?"

"Why would you?" Despayre answered matter-of-factly. "I don't have a gray hair."

Saying nothing to that logic, Synn reached for Despayre only to have him snap his teeth at Synn's fingers. Synn paused, watching him as Despayre raised an eyebrow in a silent dare. Synn tried again and a second time came close to getting his finger nipped. Discretionj being the better part of valor, Synn drew his hand back and Despayre watched in warily.

Despayre looked up and asked, "So what's keeping you awake? Hm?"

"I'm not sure you'd understand, Joshua." Synn answered in a light tone of voice, shaking his head. He was not prepared for the angry retort.

"I wish people would stop saying that to me!" Despayre spoke acidly. "Every time I want to know something that's going on, I get told I won't or can't understand and I'm tired of it!"

"Joshua..."

"I'm not dumb!"

"Joshua I never said..." Synn started but he frowned as he watched Despayre hang his head as if in shame. "Joshua, look at me. Come on, look at me."

Synn reached a hand over and cupped the boy's chin and brought his head up and was startled to see tears streaking down his face.

"I'm sorry!" Despayre stammered. "I-I'm sorry.  didn't mean to yell. Please ... don't."

"Don't?" Synn repeated. "Don't...what?"

Despayre shook his head as he clenched his eyes tightly shut. he ttried to look down but Synn's grip kept his head up.

"Look at me." Synn said in a voice that spoke of expected obedience. Despayre slowly opened his eyes and inhaled a quivering breath. He bit his bottom lip and Synn repeated. "Don't what?"

"Please don't send me back."

Synn jolted as if someone had just smacked him in the head with a baseball bat. Of all the things he had expected for an answer to Despayre's sudden behavioral change, this was not it. Despayre had been under his care and supervision for almost two straight years. He had been an extreme handful initially, and to this day still had his unexpected moments of angry outbursts and the like. But never before had this topic reared it's ugly head. Synn assumed Despayre was comforted in knowing Broodmoore was in his past, and would remain so. So what...?

"Joshua, is that what you think will happen if you misbehave?" Synn asked, sliding his hand from his jaw to his shoulder. "That I'll get rid of you?"

Synn couldn't help but feel Despayre shudder at his touch as his large hands rested on the smaller man's shoulders. Synn said nothing. He just looked at Despayre who fidgeted and avoided eye contact until he had little choice but to glance up and meet Synn's steady gaze.

Synn said in a soft but serious tone, "You listen to me, Joshua. You listen. okay?"

He waited until Despayre nodded and Synn gave his shoulders a light squeeze.

He said, "You are never going back there, do you hear me? Never! No. You look at me. I had my reasons for getting you out of that place.  I have my reasons for giving you as happy a life as I can. I have my reasons for keeping you as safe as possible. Reasons I can't explain right now, but someday you will understand everything. But I do not want you to ever believe that I would be capable of putting you back at Broodmoore."

Despayre flinched at the name of the place that was his home, or rather, prison, for so many years.

Synn continued, "I do not care if you upset me. I do not care if you flat out piss me off. You are never gong back. Never! I would die first before I allowed that."

"Don't."

"Don't... what?"

"Don't die."

Synn smiled and released his double handed grip on his shoulders and gave his shoulder a light pat. "I have no intention of leaving you."

"Promise?"

Synn nodded, "Promise. So, are you okay?"

Despayre wiped the back of his hand across his eyes and shrugged. Synn exhaled. He never knew what to expect from Despayre's unstable mind and this came from out of nowhere. He knew Broodmoore was always going to be in Despayre's mind. He just had no idea how deeply rooted that fear really was.

"Angel's lucky."

The whisper was so soft, Synn wasn't certain he had heard it. He leaned in and frowned.

"Excuse me?"

Despayre wiped his eyes again and sniffled. He repeated, "Angel is lucky."

"How so?"

"He has so many responsibilities that people trust him with. When I'm asleep, he stays awake and guards me. I'd hate to be some nightmare beastie that tries to get past him to me."

Synn said nothing. He just smiled at Despayre's complimentary commentary towards his plush friend. True, he was nineteen years old physically, but mentally he was a toddler.

Despayre continued, "He grabs his sleep when he can, but that's the beauty of being a teddy bear. Awake or asleep, people trust you with everything. All their secrets. If he's laying down for a nap or sitting there, people confide their innermost secrets to him."

He looked up at Synn calmly and whispered, "He knows things."

"I'm certain of it." Synn patted his arm. "Go get some sleep. Tomorrow will be busy for you and Gabriel."

"`Kay." Despayre finished his milk and stood up, depositing the glass in the sink. He turned and started to walk out of the kitchen, but stopped and did a u-turn. He came up behind Synn and enveloped the bigger man in his arms and hugged him tightly. he murmured, "G'night."

Synn flushed briefly and blinked, caught completely unaware by this physical display of affection. He turned his head and watched as Despayre disappeared past the doorway.

"Good night Joshua..."

The next day...

The slam of the mat reverberated through the empty gym as Gabriel brought his sparring opponent over with a snapmare and delivered a kick to his back. The man winced and clenched his eyes and fists closed as he was pulled up by a handful of hair and Gabriel tagged Despayre in.

Synn watched with determined eyes as this, the third sparring match since the day begun, continued on. Gabriel scooped the man up and drove him down to the mat and held him there, allowing Despayre to springboard over the top rope and land across the head and neck of the prone opponent with a guillotine legdrop.

The bodies of all four men glistened with a sheen of perspiration, especially that of Gabriel and Despayre. Synn was working them harder than ever before in preparation for this non-title match against the tag team champions. Gabriel and Despayre had been in big matches before. From their time in the AWA when they found themselves engaging in serious grudge matches and vying for championship titles, they came up against the creme of the crop in tag team competition.

Despayre sent the man into the ropes and caught him with a slingblade clothesline that brought the heavier man down to the mat. Despayre scaled the corner like a spider, quick as could be, and jumped off with a frog splash, landing all of his weight on the prone opponent. Despayre hooked his leg and held him down as Shane counted one - two - three.

Gabriel climbed into the ring and helped Despayre up and Shane went to check on the defeated man and nodded to his partner, another indy wrestler brought in for this training session.

"Again."

Synn spoke but the way Gabriel and Shane turned and looked at him, it was as if they weren't quite sure to believe he had spoken, or whether to believe what he had stated if he did.

"Dude...!" Gabriel protested, clearly tired but Synn arched a brow in all seriousness intended and repeated himself,

"Again." It was a tone they knew all too well. Gabriel muttered a curse and Despayre whined that he was tired but they went back to their designated corner for a brief breather while their opponents recuperated and got set to continue.

This was not to be the first time Gabriel and Despayre had been in the ring with champions. Once they had won the AWA World Tag Team Championship, targets were painted on their backs. Both young men did Synn proud as they fended off every combination put in their path until a backstage political move caused their tenure to come to an end and they walked away, unbeaten.

Synn knew silently that this combination they would be facing now would perhaps be one of their hardest challenges yet.

"You're pushing them too hard." Shane said as he climbed out of the ring during the break and approached the man he knew longer than anyone else did. he spoke gently, so the men inside of the ring would not overhear, but loud enough that he would not be ignored.

Synn turned his head slightly to glance at the Sin of pride and asked, "Am I?"

Shane did not respond as baited, but frowned. "Are you that concerned over this match?"

"I'm concerned about a lot of things lately, Shane." Synn said. "This match is but one of them." Synn turned around, putting his back against the ring apron and crossed his arms. "You've known Sean almost as long as I have, Shane. You know damn well what he's capable of."

"I thought I did at least." Shane muttered darkly. "Until he pulled that bullshit and attacked Rage the way he did."

"Yes, even I was caught by surprise when he did that." Synn admitted. "I don't know what he was thinking, unless he was just making a name for himself at a champion's expense."

"You're making excuses for your boy toy."

"No, I am not." Synn shook his head. "And in all honesty, we both know you and I would have done the same thing to push ourselves closer to the title picture. I would expect Gabriel and Despayre to do the same."

Shane shook his head, "Yes but this time it was someone doing it to one of our own. It was your mancake doing it to one of our own."

Synn sighed, "Yes, and I admit it puts me in an awkward position. But I stand by what I said. Sean will have to face Rage sooner or later to answer for that attack. I won't intervene either way. Hell, Sean may be facing retribution earlier than anticipated."

Shane frowned, "You think Rage will interfere in the match?"

"No." Synn shook his head. "I asked him not to. All actions must be accounted for but I was referring to him answering this time to Gabriel, and perhaps even Despayre. It's like you said. Sean attacked one of our own. Fond of him as I am, he had to have known Rage's friends would take exception to that."

"You'd think." Shane scoffed.

"But..." Synn spoke up and Shane turned his head back to look at him. "We can't deny the fact Sean is a gifted athlete in the ring. One of the best light heavyweights in the business."

"A threat."

Synn nodded. "Yes. I am not anxious for their unbeaten streak to end, no matter whose hands it might come by. So whether it be Sean or whomever, I want them prepared to beat whoever they must to keep that streak intact."

Shane sighed and folded his arms over his heaving chest. He looked into the ring where Gabriel and Despayre were whispering to one another in their corner. Shane turned back to find Synn also watching with interest and Shane spoke up, "What about Wyatt? Aren't you concerned about him? Dude's big as a house."

"Gabriel and Despayre have faced bigger." Synn turned back to face him. "But better trained, perhaps not. Only a fool would discredit Wyatt, given who his manager is. Dudely's one of the best this damn business has ever seen. Former world champion, so he's going to be coached as well as anyone. Better, even."

"Better than your guys?" Shane smirked.

Synn raised his eyebrows and smiled. "I wouldn't say that, but Wyatt is dangerous on Dudely's reputation alone. He wouldn't be a champion, otherwise. Our boys need to be ready."

Synn turned and looked into the ring.

"Break's over!"

All four men groaned as they made ready for another sparring match. Shane sighed and shook his head as he climbed back into the ring to officiate. Synn took his position and clanged the small ringside bell with a hammer, signaling the start of the match.

There would indeed be personal feelings going into this match. However what happened once the bell rang, that alone would be business.