Last Sunday…
I was back in my Saxon hotel room with Clarissa Vega following my statement made against Seleana Zdunich. I was still feeling a bit amused at the fact that I had trashed her parody, literally.
“She thought she could interrupt the ‘celebration of all things Andrea’... I told Clarissa with a laugh. “It’s completely unreal! But hey,.she got what she deserved and I just found out that I finally get the coward herself at Blaze of Glory!”
“It’ll be nice for you to finally settle that…” Clarissa told me as we were both watching the end of one of the Blast from the Past semifinals that featured Myra Rivers and Amber Ryan.
“I was so hoping Amber would’ve won by now…” I said, changing the subject. “...I really don’t want to see Myra in the finals. Of all the people remaining in this tournament that I didn’t want to see… really?”
Clarissa had rolled her eyes, but I was completely unaware of that. However, the events of the next few minutes caught me by surprise. Watching Christina Rose interfere and cost Amber a spot in the finals both shocked me and of course, it angered me and as soon as Myra and Mac Bane began to celebrate I immediately shut off the television. My shock had numbed me for a bit and it was preventing me from outright exploding.
“Really?” I said in a hushed voice.
“Think about who caused all that and tell me that you’re surprised…” Clarissa reminded me.
“I’m not…”
“She’s just digging her own grave, Andrea…” Clarissa reminded me. “Remember, we’re not focused on her anymore. You’ve got to focus on Seleana and…”
“No no… it’s not HER that I’m angry about. It’s the fact that MYRA is going to the finals! It’s the fact that MYRA has everything SO good right now! It’s like karma doesn’t exist with her! She deserves NOTHING that she’s gotten in SCW! She doesn’t deserve her title, the records that she’s accomplished, the GCW Hall of Fame or ANY of it! Not after all the shit she’s put me through. Why does SHE get all the damn spotlight while I’m left in the shadow? It’s TYPICAL of her! Ever since she came to SCW, she’s completely stolen my thunder! “
“I really don’t think she has…” Clarissa said, trying to reason with me.
“So tell me this…” I prefaced. “I was the world champion and in the thick and thin of the main event scene. And then she came and that all went away! It SICKENS me that I’ve fallen behind her! If she ends up winning the whole tournament and subsequently goes on to be world champion, I don’t know what the hell I’m going to think. Just the thought sickens me. She’s like the second worst person to be SCW Bombshells World Champion… for me at least. I HATE being in her shadow! I experienced that ONCE in GCW…”
“You’re NOT in her shadow, alright? She’s just on a roll. It has nothing to do with you. At the end of the day, you could’ve entered Blast from the Past yourself and maybe even beat her along the way, but you chose not to enter. You haven’t fallen behind her. I don’t know what you’re thinking trying to connect dots that aren’t even there…”
I took a deep sigh, realizing right away that she was right.
“Sorry, I get you. The way our careers have paralleled is a mere coincidence. It’s just… in general… I’m getting very frustrated. For months, trying to claw back into the spotlight… that massive setback at High Stakes. Beating Roxi helped, but this stupid tournament has kept me sidelined since then. It sucks.”
“I understand… but believe me… it’s going to get better. You’re going to have a chance at Blaze of Glory and remember… those three words are a very good memory for you!”
Clarissa flashed a quick smile at me before she left the room, giving me a little more reassurance. The frustration of seeing someone I hated in the final, however, wasn’t about to go away just like that.
“I HATE being in someone else’s shadow… I’ve dealt with it for my whole life…”
Through my frustrations, I began to remember a time in my life where it was about someone else… where I was serving as just someone else’s sidekick… where all the attention was on someone else, not me… and the more I thought about it, the more some old, bitter feelings were starting to seep through me…
October 2011…
“I’m surprised Dad let you come here…” my big brother Eduardo told me as we hung out for a brief moment in the lobby of the main gym of Red Rock High School in Sedona. Decorations were all over the place, the one standing out the most was a huge banner that said “HOMECOMING 2011” hanging from the center of the ceiling.
“Yeah…” I said with an annoyed scoff. “...you’re SO SHOCKED that Dad gave me this ONE break from his dictatorial wrestling training regimen for me to come here.”
“Why do I get the sense that you’re being sarcastic?” he asked me.
“Quit playing dumb, Eddie…” I said, breaking from my sarcasm. “...you and I both know that the only reason he even allowed me to come to homecoming was because you’re a chaperone for this damn thing. I’m pretty sure there’s no way he’s going to cut me the same slack for prom.”
“So why are you acting so ungrateful? Why are you so mad?”
Before I could even answer the question, my lifelong friend Chelsea LeClair, then known as Chelsea Summers, burst into the scene.
“ANDREA!!!!” she said with an excited tone of voice. “I’m SO glad you can make it!”
Chelsea embraces Andrea rather tightly, much to Andrea’s annoyance.
“This means so much to me! If I end up winning homecoming queen tonight, then having you here is going to make it even BETTER!”
“Yeah…” I said with a forced excitement. “I bet it will! And you know what, you’re going to win! I’m very confident in that. You’re far too popular not to win, in my book!”
“Well hey, you really were a big help with the campaigning and all! You want to get some ‘punch’, if you know what I mean?”
“NO!” I said with a snooty tone. “Because if this ‘punch’ is the kind of ‘punch’ that is prohibited on school property that we have to wait until we’re 21 for then I am not getting myself into any kind of trouble.”
“Alright. More for me then…” Chelsea says with a shrug as she leaves.
“That’s it, isn’t it?” Eddie asked.
“What?”
“That’s why you’re mad. You know Chelsea is going to win homecoming queen, aren’t you?”
I scoffed and laughed in my brother’s face.
“I’m just going to enjoy myself knowing that this may be my last bit of freedom that Dad’s going to give me for a long time.”
Rolling my eyes, I quickly walked away from my brother and went right into the action. There was a boy in the distance, also a senior at the school, that I had my eye on. I was nervous, but I was confident enough to walk up to him and his group of friends.
“Uh… hey Lorenzo…” I said to him as he looked back at me. His group of friends all looked at me and a few even smirked when they saw me.
“Hey Andrea…”
“So, I was wondering… since this is going to be our last homecoming… if you wanted to… um… I don’t know… dance?”
“Andrea… well… um…”
“SORRY, but we don’t hang out with flunkies” a blonde girl in the group said, interrupting the conversation.
“Excuse me? A FLUNKY?”
“You’re Chelsea’s lap dog aren’t you?” another kid from the group said.
“Yeah… she IS!” the blonde added. “You’ve been riding Chelsea’s coat tails the whole time. Chelsea is like… the most popular girl in the whole school and you’re just… her sidekick!”
“I AM NOT her sidekick!”
“If that’s the case, how come she’s nominated for homecoming queen and you’re not? How come she has a date to this dance and you don’t?”
“Well… that’s what I came here to talk to Lorenzo about…”
The whole group, with the exception of Lorenzo himself, burst out in laughter.
“Andrea… listen… I’m flattered and…”
“Lorenzo…” the blonde said. “You’re REALLY not considering this are you. Don’t get me wrong, Andrea’s like a 6 and all and your girlfriend just dumped you… but don’t be desperate and settle for the sidekick of a 10 when you can have a 10 yourself.”
“Yeah bro…” one of the guys in the group said. “If Chelsea herself didn’t have a boyfriend right now, you’d totally be hitting that. Don’t settle for her sidekick.”
“I AM NOT HER SIDEKICK!” I screamed at the whole group, which again brought laughter to everyone in the group with the exception of Lorenzo.
“You’re always following her around, you’re always doing favors for her, you’re always the one sleeping over at her house and not the other way around, you’re always the one putting out campaign posters for her…” the blonde began. “You’ve never bothered to stand out at all from the crowd and be your own person because you’re too busy taking care of Chelsea. Face it jumping bean, you’re a nobody. You’d be LOWER than a nobody if Chelsea wasn’t carrying your social status around here.”
Tears began to fill my eyes.
“Lorenzo, you haven’t been laughing. You’re not listening to this, are you?”
“I’m sorry Andrea…” he said to me. “I’m just… I’m not interested in you…”
Without saying a word, I turned. I was about to walk away, but someone smacked me right in the back and everyone laughed at me again. I reached back and saw that a “Chelsea’s Bitch” sign was taped to my back. I angrily tore it in half and walked away while most of the group taunted me with chants of “Chelsea’s Bitch”. I almost knocked over my brother, who stopped me at the last second.
“Whoa… you almost killed me, Andi!”
“I HOPE CHELSEA LOSES!”
“What?”
“If only I could rig the ballot box and just… shred all the Chelsea votes!”
“Andi, she’s your best friend…” he tried to remind me. “Shouldn’t you be happy for her if she wins?”
“NO!” I said with anger. “Because all I’m ever known as around here is her SIDEKICK and I’m tired of it! She has such a charmed life that I don’t! She actually has a father that treats her nice and spoils her every once in a while! She actually has the money to buy all the designer brands! Ever since I’ve known her, I have always played second fiddle to her. She’s the pretty little blond that has all the looks that Hollywood loves! Everyone here loves her, but they pretend that I don’t exist and I’m just so damn sick and tired of it!”
“I’m not trying to invalidate your feelings, Andrea… but I do think it’s sad that you’re jealous of your own best friend.”
“Oh now you’re taking HER side?”
“I never said that! Can you have some perspective for once? You’re acting like you’ve never had any attention or any spotlight in your life.”
This really triggered me as I glared at my own brother’s ignorance.
“I mean… that quinceanera you had a couple of years back… that was all about you!”
“Don’t get me started on how I’m Dad’s least favorite. Don’t get me started on how Rodrigo has always been Dad’s favorite. Don’t get me started on the fact that he treated him like he’s a fucking God in the making, but he treats me like I’m nobody. Don’t get me started on the fact that the only reason why he’s even training me to be a wrestler is because you didn’t want to be one. I’ve always been the outcast. I’ve always been the ignored one. It’s always about someone else and it’s never about me. Why can’t it be about ME for once? Why can’t I have my moment? When am I going to be the one that everyone adores and pays attention to?”
Eduardo just sighs and shakes his head.
“I love you sis, I do. I wouldn’t have given up my spot in the wrestling business for you if I didn’t. I wouldn’t have gone to Dad and put in a good word for you if I didn’t, but 10 years from now, you’re not going to be worried about such trivial things. You’ll mature and grow and you’ll see the bigger picture. High school isn’t the end all, be all of everything…”
“Can your big brother lecture… seriously. I don’t want to hear it right now.”
“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN…” the DJ’s booming voice echoed over the dance floor. “IT IS TIME TO CONCLUDE OUR HOMECOMING ROYALTY ANNOUNCEMENT! It’s the main event Y’ALL! It’s the homecoming king and queen! The votes are in and it is TIME…”
“Anyone but Chelsea… anyone but Chelsea….” I said to my brother’s annoyance as he left.
“Our 2011 homecoming king is none other than… the one, the only… the star wide receiver of your football team… MR. LORENZO SALAZAR!”
The floor exploded as the crush that turned me down earlier went up and accepted his crown, taking the microphone to make a speech.
“Thank you guys for voting for me. K. thanks. Bye.”
Lorenzo left the stage, obviously not really wanting anything to do with the ceremony. Internally, I was swooning over his low key attitude.
“Okay… man of few words… now… for homecoming queen…the winner… and this is no surprise at all… MISS CHELSEA SUMMERS!”
The whole floor exploded for her as my heart sank. Chelsea went up to accept her crown and she was far more excited for this than Lorenzo was as she took the microphone.
“THANK YOU! OH MY GOD! I’m SO excited!” she began in her shrill, excited tone of voice. “I want to thank everyone that voted for me… but the person that I want to thank the most is someone that means the whole entire world to me! Without her, this wouldn’t be possible…”
I started to soften a bit when I realized that Chelsea was really trying to be humble.
“She put together an amazing campaign for me and ever since I’ve known her, she’s been so reliable! She’s always been there for me and having her in my life is almost like having the sister that I never got to have. She’s always been so loyal, so caring and so unselfish! Andrea… you have been one hell of a partner in crime! If I’m Batman… then you’re the best Robin EVER!”
Cue the cringing that just happened to me.
“There is no better sidekick that I could’ve asked for than you…”
At this point, I got very angry and I stopped listening to what Chelsea had to say. I immediately bolted and walked out of the homecoming dance wanting no part of the occasion anymore. I really wasn’t thinking about where I was going on campus… just that I was going as far away from possible from the gym where the dance was taking place.
“SIDEKICK?!?!?!??!” I screamed into the dead, Sedona night air. I kept to myself and just hung out in the empty, outdoor lunch area until the dance was over with the intense, heavy, bitter feelings I was having about being in Chelsea’s shadow overwhelming me and causing me not to think straight at all. Needless to say… this entire night really wounded my pride as I experienced front and center the worst feeling in the world of someone else having the kind of spotlight that I wanted.
Unfortunately for my brother, contrary to his prediction…
Nearly 10 years later?
I’m still obsessed over this “trivial thing” known as attention and spotlight…
And recent events in Sin City Wrestling, particularly Blast from the Past, aren’t helping at all…
Last Sunday…
“It wasn’t until I won the SCW Bombshells World Championship where I finally got that attention and the spotlight that I had always wanted…” I thought to myself as I remained in my hotel room.
Switching gears to the biggest moment of my whole career lightened up the mood for me a little bit. I got to think about the brief moment of time where it really was about me. The memory of winning the world title had me experiencing happiness for once, even if it was only for a moment.
“...I was the toast of the whole town when I was the SCW Bombshells World Champion…” I reflected in my own internal monologue. “I was the one that everyone was paying attention to. I was the one that everyone wanted to dethrone and hate and criticize to kingdom’s come the entire time I had that title. Unfortunately, it was… well… the wrong kind of attention over the dumbest reasons. But during those two months, I was the focus of the whole division. I was the one that had an intimidation factor over just about every girl in the locker room. I was THE standard for the division. I had the brass ring in my grasp… and then like the weak little girl I had always been before I finally turned the tables on Christina… I cracked and let someone else take it from me. I let someone else, someone completely WORTHLESS, someone completely BENEATH ME, steal that brass ring from me. And just like that, the ‘Andrea is OVER’ party started…
I’m so glad that I beat Roxi and got myself back on track, but still…
It’s not going to make me the one everyone wants a piece of.
It’s not going to have the wrestling media knocking on my door and kissing my ass.
It’s not going to have respected journalists burning up my email address and wanting to do a Zoom interview with me. I’ve still got a long way to go. This division right now is infested with Stage 4 cancer… and Seleana is part of that…”
Thinking about Seleana angered me a little more. She was, as ironic as it was to admit, one of the few that actually did turn her focus and attention toward me… albeit this came with the caveat that it was only on HER terms considering that she either blindsided me or ignored me when I called her out directly.
“Of all the two faes that this locker room has,she's definitely one of them. Believe me, I’d rather be back in the main event where I belong… but for the time being, I am going to have to settle for making her my message bitch. She’s a means to an end. She’s merely someone that I’m going to have to step all over to get back to the spotlight that I am entitled to. That summer… it was rough… losing the world title… going on that stupid losing streak… my father distracting me with being a selfish asshole and deciding to die… getting a rematch… not even ONE ON ONE at that… and then being flushed out of the world title picture entirely… I had two months in the spotlight… and then I was back to the shadows like it never happened…”
I paused my internal monologue for a brief moment, as the happiness of my world title win gave way to even more bitterness…
“...and no event, or show, hit that harder for me than Violent Conduct… seeing those two bitches in the main event: the status quo of the time, and the most fragile, overbearing cunt on the whole roster, knowing that there was nothing that I could do about it was the most painful, bitter feeling that I had ever experienced during my time in this company… well… before High Stakes anyway.
Being on the outside looking in…
Being swallowed back up in the darkness…
To sum it up: the one thing worse than never being in the spotlight is being there far shorter than you wanted to be and then being unceremoniously ejected from it…”
Since no other event in my Sin City Wrestling career encapsulated the thought that just crossed my mind more than Violent Conduct… I began to have another flashback of the night where I really let out a lot of angry, bitter feelings… and not just by the assault that I had committed on Christina Rose…
Following Violent Conduct…
“You were incredibly happy about what you did to Christina…” Clarissa reminded me as we had a post-event dinner and what initially began as a celebration. “... and now you’re pissed off again. Sometimes, you can be really hard to please, you know that right?”
I didn’t react to Clarissa’s statement as I was drowning in my own anger at that point.
“Your mood changed on a dime. What the hell happened? Did you not hurt her as much as you thought?”
“No… it has nothing to do with her. I just found out that Alicia regained the world title…” I prefaced. “...and now I’m pissed off again. We’re right back to the status quo… not that the whiny, bipolar brat was any better…”
“It’s no secret that you don’t like her but…”
“But nothing! Hearing about her winning the world championship just reminded me of a fact… an embarrassing fact… that is staring at me right in the face.”
“And what’s that, Andrea?”
“Last Supercard, I was in the main event with both of those overrated, overplayed bitches…” I reminded Clarissa, as much as it pained me to bring up Summer XXXtreme at all. “...and now, I couldn’t even get a match for this damn show. It’s the first time since I’ve been here that I wasn’t wrestling on a supercard at all and you think that is something I forgot about? You think that wasn’t something that completely pained me? Because it did! It’s fucking EMBARRASSING, that’s what it is! It’s a reflection of how far I had really fallen over the summer: to go from the main event of THREE supercards in a row to not being on one at all? That’s CRAZY! Someone that’s as high of a class of a wrestler as me shouldn’t have that happen to them!”
“You just need to remember that you didn’t need a match tonight to shake things up…” Clarissa reminded me.
“DUH! Why else did you think I did what I did to Christina? It wasn’t just for the personal bullshit between both of us. I was taking out some career related anger too. I did that to her because I knew coming into this garbage show tonight that I was now out of the spotlight: irrelevant if you will. Getting pinned at Summer XXXtreme meant that my time was over and it’s a painful cross that I’ve had to bear for months! I hit the bottom with that fucking battle royal too! I knew when I hit the floor that I had crossed the bridge to complete and total irrelevance and I HAD to do something to get back in the spotlight. I HAD to do something to have all eyes focused on me again. I HAD to do something to steal the show AND steal the spotlight away from those two bitches! I can’t STAND not being in the main event spotlight anymore! It makes me fucking SICK!!!!”
I further vented my anger by grabbing a chicken tender that I had on my plate so hard that I actually broke it apart into two pieces.
“I went from being the absolute BEST woman on the roster that nobody touched to being just another bitch on the roster! I am no better than some cheap, flash in the pan champion like Polly Playtime or Amy Marshall! I am no better than some nobody champion such as Electra Styles. I was nothing more than the last of three champions that served as a transitional bridge between Alicia and Evie and that just… I CAN’T! I can’t fucking BEAR that cross much longer! I COULDN’T! Everything is just completely unfair…”
“Andrea, come on, let’s not exaggerate this…”
“You think I’m exaggerating? Why don’t you try living a dream that you wanted your whole life and then have it ripped away from you way too soon and then, to make it all the more worse, get kicked to the curb like it never happened like a Seleana Zdunich or something. I REFUSE to be another Seleana, Clarissa. I REFUSE to be another Electra, or Polly, or Amy! I am NOT going to be like ANY of them! I am NOT going to fade out of the spotlight! I REFUSE to fade just like those four bitches did! You know what the fuck happened to Electra, Polly and Amy? They all faded from the spotlight, never to be heard from again… with the exception of Amy but even then, she was always someone that was just there… that had ONE moment and that was that…
What kind of Hall of Fame member is that, Clarissa?
I was feeling like I WAS one of those people… so I HAD to do that to show them all that I wasn’t…
Seleana is going down that path… and I refuse to be like her. I’m not going to be one of them… I’m not going to be one of them… I’m not going to be one of them…”
“Okay, okay, I get it…” Clarissa said, interrupting me before I went into a further neurosis.
“NO! You don’t!”
“It’s simple, Andrea… all of these thoughts and behaviors… they’re coming out of you because of how disappointed and bitter you are about your world championship experience. I’ve seen a lot of wrestlers like you go through the same thing in some of the companies I’ve been part of. I saw it in PRW a decade ago where a flash in the pan became an overnight sensation and suddenly won a world title from one of the greatest women’s wrestlers I’d ever seen. His reign only lasted two months before Myra stopped him dead in his tracks. He was never, ever the same after that. I saw it in GCW multiple times with one hit wonder champions and let me tell you something Andrea… you’re NOTHING like anyone I just mentioned. In GCW, it was a common thing where someone loses a world title and just accepts moving to the back of the line. You’ve got one up on people like that because you’re NOT accepting the ‘back of the line’ crap. You’ve got one up on the flash in the pan world champion from PRW because you grinded and worked hard, busted your ass and maintained your passion for this through thick and thin… while that idiot essentially cracked, buckled and internally quit after Myra beat him for the title. You’re better than they are. I understand that you’re disappointed and bitter because you feel like you should’ve done better but you’re in no danger of being like anyone we’ve talked about.”
Clarissa’s calming words: once again having an effect on me whenever I needed them the most.
“I get that you’re afraid of ‘being irrelevant again’, but let’s pump the brakes on that, okay?”
“You’re right…” I admitted to Clarissa. “I do feel that way. I KNOW I should’ve done better as a world champion. But I didn’t because I was still that stupid, awful DADDY’S GIRL at the time. GOD, I’m really beginning to HATE who I was…”
“You took the first big step tonight, okay? Pay no mind to what Evie and Alicia are doing… seriously.”
I took a deep breath, calming down for a moment, before the joy of what I had done to Christina earlier in the night began to kick in again. Coming out of this night, I was motivated, bitter and determined to get back in the spotlight… and all this time later, I’m STILL carrying those same feelings…
March 20, 2021
Coming out of that brief reflection, I find myself in the kitchen with some birthday decorations from the week before still extremely prominent even though the birthday cake was long gone. The camera was in front of me, but it wasn’t on yet. I was definitely looking forward to ripping Seleana a new one, without a shadow of a doubt. But when I thought about my wrestling journey in the last year, particularly beginning from Blaze of Glory, I got a little more angry and motivated.
“Now is the time…” I said to myself. “I have to step it up. I’ve got to make a statement and let this company know that I am done with being dismissed and forgotten about. On my birthday last week I made a wish… no a GOAL… I made a GOAL… a VOW… to get MY spotlight back! I made it a MISSION to get back what I DESERVE!”
I grabbed a remote and turned on a monitor behind me, showing a still image moment of myself becoming the SCW Bombshells World Champion last year at Blaze of Glory. I set up a chair in front of the camera and then went to the camera itself, turning it on. I gathered some final thoughts before I ultimately sat down in front of the camera, and in front of the still image of the most amazing, glorious moment of my life, before I really let Seleana have it…
“It’s been too damn long since I’ve been in a match. I know I can mostly blame that o the stupid Blast from the Past tournament which by the way, I STILL don’t regret skipping because the entire tournament is a load of shit… as you saw last week and as you saw by who made it all the way to the finals… but hey, annoying nonsense aside about it being far too long since my last match, I’d say that things are really beginning to get good for me. After all, the last time that I was in a match, it was against Roxi Johnson and I defeated her and believe me, it was the best damn feeling that I’ve had in a Sin City Wrestling ring since the moment you see in the still image behind me. It was a match that I HAD to have. I HAD to beat Roxi! It was IMPERATIVE that I did so and it’s not just because of the whole narrative that I had to beat my former role model with all of the history that, it was because in the back of my mind, the pressure was on me. I hadn’t won on a supercard since the last Blaze of Glory. The four supercards after that were a source of embarrassment for me either because I lost to someone that I couldn’t stand or because I wasn’t on the card at all. If I had lost to Roxi… that was going to further push me down the rabbit hole of former SCW World Champions that had lost their way and/or forgotten how to step up in a clutch moment. That would’ve further solidified me as another Electra Styles, or another Polly Playtime or another Amy Marshall. And most damning of all, Seleana… it would’ve made me another one of YOU!
YOU are in that group of former SCW World Bombshell Champions that had their day in the sun for about 30 days or so when you dethroned Alicia Lukas for the world title… before losing it right back to her. Ever since you lost that title right back to Alicia? You just haven’t been able to get back to that main event level. You went from main eventing the biggest show of the year back in 2019, which you lost of course, to happily settling for being in the shadow of someone else. Someone with the passion that you have for this business deserves SO much better I’m not denying that you are passionate about what you do:that’s one of the few things I’ll give you, but it’s almost as if you’re blind to or completely willing to accept the fact that your place in this business is always being up Christina’s ass YOU, being the kind of wrestler that you are, with that amount of passion for this business… misplaced mosof the time albeit… deserve SO much better than being known as Christina’s sidekick. And yet, you center every fiber of your being around her. The last time we fought against each other… you know, when I hospitalized you in that streetfight and everything… it was NEVER about YOU. It was ALL about avenging HER! Every time she does something wrong, you turn the other cheek like the spineless, cowardly, jellyfish that you are… either not acknowledging that what she did was wrong, or trying to make a bunch of excuses for it altogether. Ever since High Stakes 2019… you have slowly, but surely… settled into the role of “just Christina’s wife” and you just NEVER seem to get that! Even when you were the Roulette Champion and having the reign that you did, you STILL took that back seat to her and her world title aspirations and this fade into the shadows that you’ve had going on since your little flash in the pan title reign? It’s gotten even WORSE since you lost the Roulette Championship. The only two things that you have been consistent with ever since Johanna beat your ass and took that title from you are settling further and further into your role as Christina's sidekick bitch and constantly LOSING on Supercards: you lost the title to Johanna… then you were handed an Internet title match against Myra for no reason and you lost that too… more on that in a minute… and most recently, you lost to Amber… which is funny because instead of focusing on Amber, you focused on ME and you bitched and moaned about how you wanted to fight me again…
And where did that get you, Seleana?
Oh right… being the gatekeeper for Christina. Again. Amber basically used YOU as a stepping stone to get to her and NOWHERE did you express that it bothered you. Yet, SOMEHOW… you STILL don’t see how being up Christina’s ass is anchoring YOUR career! Now… I am going to do something that is going to make me SICK… nothing LITERAL hopefully… I am actually going to take something Myra Rivers said to you and actually AGREE with her on something…
Excuse me while I swallow my pride…”
I scoff as I pantomime a glass of “pride” and make the motion of drinking water from a cup, even swallowing air to literally portray this.
“Myra called you out, going into High Stakes, for not promoting your title match against her enough.. And she’s right… you weren’t. Why? Because ONCE AGAIN… everything revolves around Christina! Granted, I should take SOME credit for that…. HA… but STILL… it was a rightful criticism, something that you should’ve taken in stride, apologize for, own up to, and say ‘hey, I’m good to go!’ But NAH, you didn’t do that. Insead, you respond to her by cussing her out, bitching and crying and suddenly attacking her in a completely different tune than you were in your first promo against her when you were nothing but respectful to her. Your BIPOLAR ASS flipped the fuck out on her for NO REASON AT ALL because YOU couldn’t handle the truth. It’s not like Myra was being mean about it… believe me, I KNOW when Myra is being mean about something… but HOW DARE someone else call you out for the truth, right? Well here’s the cold, hard truth for you Seleana… you are completely incapable of being your own woman. You just tail Christina, willingly being in her shadow, willingly being her little sidekick bitch and as Amber Ryan proved, you have completely devolved into the woman that people need to beat, in order to get to Christina. You have become a sad, shadow of even yourself. People constantly attack you and say you’re incapable of this and incapable of that and all of that and yet you still do the same fucking thing.
The BIG difference between me and you as far as the shadows are concerned is that I’m FAR less willing to stay in them. I’m NOT you, Seleana. I am NOT the kind of person that accepts taking a back seat to someone else. I am NOT the kind of woman that willingly accepts being someone else’s sidekick. I didn’t get to where I am in this business by playing sidekick bitch, you understand that? Remember how last year when Christina tried so fucking hard to be my friend? FUCK that! If I accepted being her friend, you know where that would’ve gotten me? That would’ve made me just another bitch that is riding her coattails just like what YOU’VE done your whole entire career! That would’ve made me just another member of her posse that had to sit back and let her have all the glory! Being friends with HER? That would’ve neutered my rise to the top! I didn’t come to Sin City Wrestling to make friends, I came here to be the best fucking women’s wrestler in the world. I was NEVER going to play sidekick bitch to her! I broke free from the shadow of another, Seleana. I broke out from under the shadow of my former friend and tag team partner. I broke out from MYRA’S shadow because back in the GCW days, that overdramatic bitch did EVERYTHING in her power to keep me under her thumb only for her to FAIL! I have never, EVER settled for being in the shadow of another in my career. Hell, I LEFT OCW to come here because deep down in my heart, I knew that if I stayed there, I was ALWAYS going to be in the shadows of a bunch of old, outdated, sexist pigs stuck in the nineties that were basically using that sorry ass excuse of a company as a working retirement home.
And WHY should I settle for that?
WHY should I settle for being second best to Myra or to my former tag team partner?
WHY should I sit back and settle for taking a backseat to ANYONE on this roster, especially you?
I look at you and I see the personification of what I would’ve been as a wrestler in this company if I was stupid enough to be Christina’s friend… and why should I accept mediocrity the way you have, huh?
Why should I be someone else’s sidekick? FUCK that, Seleana! For ONCE in your damn life, grow some fucking BALLS!
Because as you’ve shown your entire career here, you’ve never had any… you’ve always been that whipped bitch that takes a back seat to someone else. You’ve ALWAYS been a coward because you’ve NEVER… not ONCE… in your career have you even TRIED to make your career about you. Not once have you TRIED to pin your existence on anything other than Christina. Not once have you TRIED to be brave and say that you can make it without her standing over you, shadowing you ever step if the way. You haven’t tried because you’re scared. Deep down inside, you’re nothing but a coward that knows deep down in her pathetic soul that the moment you even make that effort, you’re going to be exposed as the sidekick bitch that can’t make a name for herself without her lips being sewed to Christina’s ass. You’re afraid of that exposure just as much as you have been afraid of ME and I’ve HAD IT with this cat and mouse BULLSHIT, Seleana!
I’ve HAD IT with your hit and run BULLSHIT!
I’ve had it with you only even bothering to deal with me when it’s at your best convenience. You name-dropped me constantly going into your match against Amber and yeah, I let it slide, but damn, I wasn’t happy when you did that. It angered me. I HATED that you did that because, in all honesty, you’ve become a smaller fish to fry ever since Johanna ended your Roulette title reign, and honest to God, Seleana, the only reason why I am even putting up with you right now is to shut you the hell up. I’m only doing this because you should know that for every action, there’s a consequence. Did you SERIOUSLY think I was going to let your pathetic, horrific name dropping and all your whining and bitching about wanting to face me when Amber was your opponent slide? I NEVER was going to do that. I was quiet about it at first because of the damn tournament, but I, and everyone else, knew that you weren’t long for it, and sure enough, you weren’t. I knew that as soon as your inevitable elimination happened that you were MINE and the moment you got eliminated, I called you out!
I was all over social media. And your response?
SILENCE!
Why so silent, Seleana? Did you realize at that moment that you were completely fucked? Possibly. But the more likely scenario is the fact that you talked ALL of that shit about me not expecting me to respond to you at all. You’ve done nothing but run from me ever since, because you’re cowering in your corner thinking ‘what am I going to do?’ You’re behaving like a coward because you NEVER anticipated a response from me and once I DID respond? You do what you’ve done your whole career Seleana: you ran. I kept calling you out in public, you wouldn’t respond and it wasn’t until a few weeks ago on Climax Control when I went into the ring and called you out that you FINALLY decided that you were going to take action against me.
...by blindsiding me from behind…
At this point, as I recalled Seleana’s blindside toward me, I could only laugh.
“You couldn’t walk down to this ring, meet me face to face, and talk to me. No, you had to blindside me from behind like the giant pussy that you’ve always been and always will be. So yeah, I pushed the envelope JUST to try to get under your skin a little more… you know… SE-LAME-A ZDUNICH! At least that poor excuse of a parody had bigger balls than you did because last week… she did something that… throughout this whole time… you’ve yet to do… and that’s stand up to me, face to face. The PARODY of you can do that, but not you? I mean.. SURE… I beat the shit out of her AGAIN and dumped her in the trash very easily, but at least I can RESPECT the fact that she had bigger balls than you. At least SHE had the nerve to get in my face and talk trash while you hide behind Christina’s skirt, hide behind a camera while taking cheap shots at me, and hiding behind a mask. It baffles me that someone that has accomplished what you have in spite of being someone else’s sidekick resorts to this type of crap. Did Christina teach you that one too? Whatever… the bottom line is, Seleana, at Blaze of Glory… which by the way consists of my favorite wrestling memory EVER… I’m DONE with this cat and mouse shit. I’m DONE with your cowardice. I’m DONE with your two-faced nonsense of calling me out when you’re facing another wrestler only to oyster up and hide the moment I call you out.
You’ve hit and ran enough, Seleana.
You’ve blindsided me enough.
And at Blaze of Glory, I am going to finish this MY WAY, you understand that? I’ll show this roster exactly why I’m not you. I’ll show them why unlike you, I don’t stay stuck in the shadow of someone else. I’ll settle this with you once and for all Seleana… and at Blaze of Glory? I’m going to make an example out of you and show this roster that the spotlight of this division DESERVES to be on ME! You’re going to be among the first to realize first hand that I’m done being forced into a back seat to any other Bombshell in this division by either another Bombshell… or the jackoffs in charge! I am going to do what you have ALWAYS been incapable of doing and that’s OWN the fucking spotlight and PROVE that I’m NOT you: some short term, one hit wonder world championship BITCH that could never get back to the promised land or even close...
So count your blessings while you still can, Seleana…
Because at Blaze of Glory?
I’m going to make you regret ever wanting to face me….
Unamused by Seleana’s antics, I walk over to the camera and shut it off. I give myself time to let this anger that’s built up for weeks and months seethe for a few moments before I carry on with my night..
