<div align="center">Part 1: #WhoNext</div>


I hear that theme playin’ me out, one of the sweetest GAWD DAMN sounds in the world. It might not’ve been the big arena shit that I’d previously been makin’ louder than my ex-bitch, but you best believe I was keepin’ the house on they feet. Pushin’ past the curtains, I shoot a smirk at a few slow clappin’ workers who applaud my performance before takin’ notice of the camera followin’ my every movement.

<div style="text-align:right;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Looks like there’s a lot of shock right now. You just came in and took out a tag title contender like it wasn’t nothin’.&nbsp;</span></div>
I knew I was goin’ to.

I slap my hand across the cameraman’s back before mock polishin’ his lens as I step in front and stare directly into his shot.

Andre: Well, I told y’all muhfuckers that I was gonna come in and run shit against whoever I was put against and what do you see? It’s happenin’ right now, bruh bruh nation. If you was on board the AA train prior to me joinin’ this federation then you already know, but if this was your first taste of what I’m capable of, then ya welcome for that tuition free education. Kunta just gave everyone the most entertainin’ display inside an SCW ring up to this point and I’m here to continue to do that week after week.

Killian was the first member of the men’s locker room to gobble up that big ol’ lightskin hangdown like it was Thanksgivin’ turkey. I was proud to turn him into my statement win and show y’all how I do. This Climax Control’s result was already in them cards. Violent Conduct ain’t gonna be no different neither. I don’t care what bitch ass they wanna throw in my way, they’ll end up fallin’ just the same-

I’m cut off by some lil’ dude who be lookin’ like an awkward intern whisperin’ into my ear. More specifically, tellin’ me the word goin’ around on who that second opponent finna be.

Andre: Reeeealllly now?

He shoots me an uncomfortable nod, confirmin’ his prior statement.

Andre: ...As I was sayin’, the opposition can try to stand up as tall as they want, but in the end they’ll all fall to Siiiiiiiickwwwwaaaaaves BLAWKUHMORA!

<div style="text-align:center;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">#FadeToLightskin</span></div>


<div style="text-align:center;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Part 2: #Vacancy</span></div>


Steppin’ up to Kara’s camper door, I form a fist and tap against the thin exterior.

Andre: Kara, you home?

Nothing.

Andre: Kara?

I continue the knock, but still, no response from my lil’ hippy lady bruh.

Andre: Kara!

<div style="text-align:right;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Yeah, I don’t think she’s here, homie.</span></div><div style="text-align:right;">
</div>Hmm..

As I turn from the camper, I find myself face to face wit’ the nastiest lookin’ sumbitch that I’ve seen in my life. His rotting mouth and grime-caked skin give off the impression that his ass ain’t showered even once in his life before. He furrows his messy unibrow before openin’ his jaws and releasin’ a wave of stench.

: It’s not kind to shout around Slabs like that, boy.

Normally, I’d think ol’ dude sayin’ some shit like that just doesn’t like colored folk, but this just seemed like typical creepy dude in a horror move speak.

Andre: My bad.

: Sounds like they ain’t home anyway…

I remember the stories about leavin’ ya shit as well as what Kara was tellin’ me about lootin’ happenin’ in Slab City. While I know that most people ain’t fuck wit’ ya shit, there still finna be tweakers who just don’t give a fuck about what the general courtesy is and this guy definitely be raisin’ some red flags.

Andre: Yeah, it’s my friend’s camp.

: Welllll then...I hope she returrnns..

His raspy, tar hackin’ voice sure as hell wasn’t makin’ things any less sketchy.

Andre: Excuse me?

: Salton Sea ain’t too far away. Twenty minute drive down the road and you’ll find the waters edge. Who know? You talk the wrong way to the wrong person or find yourself ‘round the wrong person in general...might just find yourself at the bottom of it reachin’ for air that just ain’t there..

<div style="text-align:right;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Creepy bastard.</span></div>
You’re tellin’ me.

: You take care of yourself now.

He turns away and heads the direction he came from, almost draggin’ himself into the desert.

Kara: Hey.

Andre: Shit!

People out here gonna make me have a damn heart attack today.

Kara: You good?

Andre: Yeah..

She leans past me a bit, tryin’ to see where my focus is right now.

Kara: Let me guess...you met Rodney?

Andre: You know that fuckin’ weirdo?

Kara: Don’t worry, he’s harmless. Just a little fucked in the head.

Andre: If you say so..

She shoots me that familiar friendly smile before turnin’ her attention to the pickup behind her.

Kara: Had to go lend a hand on a water run. Mind helping me get mine unloaded?

Andre: Yeah, no problem.

As we walk together, I can’t help but take a lil’ bit more notice of Kara’s form. For a hippy livin’ in the middle of the desert, she be lookin’ pretty damn good.

Kara: Glad you got back okay. How’d the match go?

Andre: I mean, I won if that’s what you wanna know.

Kara: That’s great!

Andre: Yeah, I knew I was goin’ to.

Kara: Little arrogant, are we now?

Andre: Call it what you want. I just know my shit in a wrestlin’ ring is all.

Kara: You like the place then?

Andre: Yeah, it ain’t bad. Bit of a smaller set up, bizarre six sided ring shit and all, but they seem the kind of place that is lookin’ for people to step in and be part of long term and I think I may just be the answer.

Kara: Just be glad I’m not in the picture to outshine you.

Seems like this smartass lil’ chick startin’ to pick up on a bit of that SickWaves wit. As we reach the back of the truck, she wipes a line of sweat from her forehead before pulling on the handle and openin’ up the bed which is full of miscellaneous jugs and odd containers full of that aqua. She pulls one forward, one of them big office sized ones which she drops into my arms.

Kara: I’ll take these couple here, should about do it for us. This area should be covered for at least a few days.

She sits one of her jugs down and taps the side of the vehicle. After a couple of seconds, the driver starts back up and heads off through the sandy air.

Andre: You always on supply duty?

Kara: I try to pitch in as much as possible. The good ones have to stick together, ya know?

Andre: I hear that.

Kara: So, you got any plans for tonight then?

Andre: I mean, it’s been a couple weeks in Slabs and I still don’t really know nobody, so probably not.

Kara: You shouldn’t let yourself turn into the next Slab City hermit. You’re too young and too fun for that.

Andre: What you sayin’ then?

Kara: You have plenty of time between wrestling matches to experience what this place has to offer. Let me take you out tonight?

Andre: You tryna lock down my ass down already?

Kara: Don’t get all lame on me right now, Mr. Taylor. I just think letting me introduce you to our art scene could be fun for the both of us.

Andre: I think I seen all the silverware totems and car tire collages this place has to offer.

Kara: I’m talking about a jam session.

Andre: Really? Out here?

Kara: Yeah, there are a lot of musicians actually. I can’t say that all of them are world class or anything, but some of them aren’t half bad to be honest.

Andre: Could be worth checkin’ out I suppose.

Kara: You’re down then?

Andre: Yeah, fuck it. Why not?

There she goes wit’ that grin again.

Kara: Awesome!

Kara bends down and lifts the jugs up once more, trailin’ behind me as I head to her camper. Without turnin’ to face her, I call back.

Andre: Kara.

Kara: Yeah?

Andre: Don’t leave my ass to converse with Rodney alone ever again.



<div style="text-align:center;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Part 3: #Gathering</span></div>


Nah, this wasn’t like no Juggalo bullshit. Them dudes be lookin’ high class when compared to this and a lot more unified. What we got here is what looks to be about two or three hundred squattin’ ass people huddled together in small packs either standin’, layed out on broken down furniture, or just plain layed out in the middle of the desert as if scorpions and snakes don’t exist.

Kara: Bit of a culture shock?

Andre: A little bit, but it ain’t like I never been around broke shit.

Kara: Well, was I to assume that you grew up poor just because you’re black?

Andre: Ain’t gonna hurt my feelings with that shit. I been hit wit’ so much shit it’d give MLK a heart attack if he was still alive to hear it.

Kara: Feeling comfortable yet then?

Andre: I been through a lot. Comfortable ain’t exactly the word I’d use when it comes to me havin’ to live out in a place like this. You a cool chick and all and as you said, it’s not like everyone out here is bad, but I didn’t come here under the best terms. Maybe I’m a lil’ too on edge, but I make sure I survive.

Kara: Serious stuff later. Just relax for now.

Andre: If you insist.

I lean back the best I can, avoidin’ the twisted insides of the sofa we’re sittin’ on as to not get tetanus from an old spring or some shit.

Kara: I know the bass player up there, guy named Rich.

Andre: Seems like he’s the only one holdin’ it down actually.

Kara: Yeah, he’s one of Slab City’s more known veterans. Came up in the sixties as a roadie when he wasn’t being deployed.

Andre: Respect.

Kara: You meet a lot of seasoned people out h-

She stops mid-sentence at sight of a sharp light glowin’ towards us. Kara focuses in as the beam begins to cut through the crowd.

Kara: We should go.

Andre: Really? It’s just a-

Kara: We should go.

The light continues to flood the area as she grabs my hand, pullin’ me up from my spot and speedwalkin’ back towards camp.

Andre: Anything I should know about?

Kara: We’ll talk more at home.

<div style="text-align:right;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Home, eh? She said that sorta weird, don’t you think?  Lil’ mama really must be catchin’ them feels for you, bruh bruh.</span></div>
Not now, Dubs.

She gradually picks up speed as we reach a relatively tame part of town, likely quiet because of all the inhabitants occupyin’ space at the jam session.

<div style="text-align:right;"><i style="font-size:11pt;">This one seems a bit paranoid, man. I know y’all are out here for valid reasons and shit, but it was just some fuckin’ headlights, ya know?</div>
Dude.

<div style="text-align:right;"><i style="font-size:11pt;">Fine, but don’t say I didn’t warn ya.</div>
As Kara’s camper comes into view, a weak bark is heard behind us. She picks up even more speed at the sound trailin’ us as she mutters under her breath.

Kara: Fuckin’ dogs..

The bark comes closer as we get to the front door. Kara yanks it open and pulls us both inside before grabbing hold again and slammin’ it shut behind her. She walks to the window above the kitchen, takin’ a quick peep through the curtains.

Andre: Everything okay?

Kara: For now.

Andre: What was that about back there?

Kara: ...Just..trying to be street smart about things. You have to if you’re gonna survive in Slabs.

Andre: It was just a couple of headlights though, right?

Kara: ...Yeah, but late at night when everyone in the area is huddled up for the jam like that isn’t the time to trust someone flashing their brights in your face. Better safe than sorry.

Andre: I guess..

<div style="text-align:right;"><i style="font-size:11pt;">Ay, does it seem like there’s somethin’ off to you with this one?&nbsp;</div>
Not sure, man..

The bark flares up once again. This time, it’s comin’ from just outside the front door of the camper.

Andre: What do we do about that?

Kara: It’s...probably best ignored. Just hope it goes away or tires itself out.

She slumps down onto the rounded bench surroundin’ the kitchen table, her dreads floppin’ up and fallin’ back over her shoulders as she takes a moment to catch her breath.

Kara: You want tea?



<div style="text-align:center;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Part 4: #RodneysRevenge</span></div><div style="text-align:center;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">(via WhatCulture Wrestling)</span></div><div style="text-align:center;">
</div>

Here we are, backstage in this bitch doin’ that exclusive one on one wit’ Adam muhfuckin’ Blampied of all people. I guess when you go from tourin’ the country to signin’ wit’ a bloomin’ indie fed like #EssSeaDub, it ends up attractin’ some eyes.

<div style="text-align:right;"><i style="font-size:11pt;">Ain’t you stressin’ on the risk of exposin’ yourself given why we ended up in this situation in the first place?</div>
I think I’ll be fine wit’ this one.

Adam Blampied: Hello, ladies and gents! I’m Adam from WhatCulture.com. We are here at the Gold Coast Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada and joining me this evening is a man known throughout the world for his in ring antics and hard hitting style, “Prince Lightskin” Andre Aquarius. Andre, pleasure to be here talking with you tonight.

Andre: Likewise, bruh bruh. Big fan of what you guys be doin’ wit’ ya channel and what not.

Adam Blampied: Much appreciated. Now, if you don’t mind, let’s get right into things and maybe get some answers that the people watching have been wanting to know.

Andre: Ask away.

Adam Blampied: One thing that fans have been blowing us up on Twitter about, as I’m sure you’re aware, is why you’ve opted to sign with an independent in Sin City Wrestling.

Andre: In a way, I sorta just ended up driftin’ into the #EssSeaDub locker room. The contract offer was there and I thought what if someone like me went back to the indies not just wit’ the intent of sellin’ out a few venues or gettin’ paid on that primo shit, but if they actually put a stranglehold on the whole damn thing and made that indie promotion bigger than anyone thought possible? That’s why I think I’m here, what my purpose is.

Adam Blampied: Interesting. Now, you’ve also had some big things to say about where you currently see yourself sitting on the ladder in SCW. How high do you see yourself on that ladder following your debut win over Killian Sweete a couple weeks ago?

Andre: Let me put it to ya this way, Adam. I told everyone before I even laced up boots for this company that I was in control, that I was the new captain. In just one match, I didn’t just manage to shock the rest of the #EssSeaDub workforce or upset a few lowly Vegas gamblers. No, ya boy has done much more. By makin’ sure that I firmly put my stamp on this place the way that I did, I’ve managed to create rookie of the year buzz just a few months before they be lookin’ for the recipient of said award. Kunta has become the wrestlin' world’s version of ‘84 Jordan.

Adam Blampied: Right, so with that in mind, what’s the mindset going into your match tonight against Holly Wood?

Andre: You don’t expect me to be changin’ it up just like that after my mindset and way of goin’ about things worked out so well for me last time now, do ya? That’d be novice shit on some level one mark hype for you to be thinkin’ that way, Adam. My approach isn’t even close to bein’ rivaled by another member of the locker room, bruh. Send all them peeps on down to Kunta’s plantation and I’ll leave’em all the same. Killian, Holly, Calvin, it doesn’t matter to me what name or face they put across from me in them six sides.

Adam Blampied: We’ve also heard that Holly herself was the one who was seeking this match against you. How much truth is there to that exactly?

Andre: You heard right. Apparently, lil’ mama was still feelin’ froggy after witnessin’ SickWaves beat another man into a sympanty title shot and thought “I’m gonna teach this boy a lesson.” Why did she do that exactly? I been hearin’ through the grapevine that it has somethin’ to do wit’ the way ya boy was layin’ it down in that debut promo. They be sayin’ shit about how Holly didn’t approve of me droppin’ “the f word”. Knowin’ that she ain’t the only one to be takin’ offense to how I be cuttin’ promos, let me ask you and everybody else watchin’ a quick question.

Am I the type of muhfucker to hop in front of the camera and drop that dreaded “f word” because of how someone be identifyin’ sexually or because of they gender? Naaaah, dude. To be real wit’ ya, I could care less about what Killian, Holly, or anyone else choose to do wit’ they shit. Simply put, these muhfuckers already be losin’ against Kunta in the game of starter level mind games. I mean, I got someone steppin’ out while I be performin’ to “keep an eye on me” or some shit all because I be droppin’ terminology that got’em shook to they core?

The important part is that I said I would beat Killian’s bitch ass and I did. In the process of all that, you got Holly thinkin’ that she just finna be able to waltz on down to ya boy’s showcase and start plottin’ to serve up them just deserts or somethin’. It ain’t ‘bout to work out that way. When that Babs Johnson lookin’ ass bitch decided to sign up for a match wit’ Andre muhfuckin’ Aquarius, she fell for the bait too damn easy and now finds herself playin’ right into my hands. While it don’t seem she knows how to resist a lil’ bit of elementary slander and obviously didn’t learn the lesson from watchin’ Killian’s demise against me, I’m still more than happy to show her ass the way this be workin’ out in #EssSeaDub goin’ forward.

Oh, and don’t worry, I already been hearin’ people askin’ if I’ll be up against “Holly Wood” or Alex Jeffries like it makes even a lil’ bit of a difference in the end. I’m here as an equal opportunity type. If it’s Alex that comes down lookin’ to knock some RESPECK into me, then so be it. If it’s the “Holly Wood” y’all know as this company’s beloved transgender soopuhstaw, then it still plays out the same way. Personally, I’m sorta hopin’ I get to face the lady version of this muhfucker tonight so I can beat her ass back into a man just to watch Alex cry like a lil’ bitch anyway. Ohhhhhhh, the irony in that would make me ROCK fuckin’ hard.

For real though, I can’t be the only one seein’ how absurd this shit is. We got a trans chick tryna go toe to toe wit’ the new franchise just because she found me offensive. Right now, we livin’ in a world where I have to go out there and absolutely obliterate somebody who be expectin’ to whaled on over some shit like gender. Bruh, I ain’t finna hurt her ass for bein’ trans. Imma do it for tryin’ to get in the way of a young black boy’s success. More importantly, THIS black boy’s success.

There’s only so many spots for people hopin’ to reach the top and Imma be holdin’ down mine as I lay into Holly with strike after brutal strike. Tonight, I look to stripe life from this muhfucker. If anyone out there be feelin’ like ya boy tryna step on someone’s liberty right now, you’re absolutely fuckin’ right. This ain’t a hate crime bein’ carried out over trivial differences. This is me throwin’ every bit of aggression and violence inside my very soul at anyone who tryin’ to step up in an attempt to convince the world that they can even come close to holdin’ a candle to my shit. You wanna talk oppression? You wanna talk controversy? Tonight, everybody watchin’ will be witness to Rodney’s revenge.

Adam Blampied: Well, Andre, it’s been a pleasure and we’ll definitely be looking forward to your match.

After a quick handshake for the camera, we part ways as Blampied wanders off down the hall.

<div style="text-align:right;"><span style="font-size:11pt;">Rodney’s revenge?</span></div>
Mr. King ate 33 hits from them batons, but I’m about to be doin’ somethin’ far, far worse..