It’s been a long month for Jessie but now the three time champion was getting her chance to earn her third Bombshell Tag Title Reign and whilst her rematch for the titles isn’t exactly the way she envisioned it when she first lost the titles she still had her chance as she was teaming up with “Nurse†Cynthia Warren to take on Joanne Canelli and Veronica Taylor, not only that but she apparently has a special surprise in store for this promo, what was the surprise? Not even I know that but will this surprise be enough for the win?
Kensington Town Forum, London, England
Halloween, 2014, 11:00pm
I can’t believe that I actually convinced an SCW cameracrew to go into a Cannibal Corpse pit for a promo.
Anyone who’s from London will probably recognize the venue as a fairly large music hall that looks like a converted theater me? I don’t know the history of this place but what I do know is that it’s a damn good music venue and Cannibal Corpse are currently crushing it with “Make Them Suffer†which according to a setlist that I read a couple of days ago should be one of the last songs of their set.
But that’s not what you’re interested in, isn’t it? You’re wondering how I talked a cameracrew into following me and the boys into a Cannibal Corpse pit. Or a pit at a metal show for that matter, well….
*flashback*
It started yesterday evening at our hotel room here in England and we were basically getting ready to go to bed at that point so that we’d have plenty of energy for the concert itself.
“Okay guys, I don’t know if the venue allows outside drink on the premises but we should probably air on the side of caution and take extra cash.†Jake commented and we nodded in agreement, we pretty much had this conversation whenever we were making preparations for shows like this or festivals like Bloodstock so this was the norm for us. “As for food, well I drove by the venue earlier and at first glance it didn’t look like there was anywhere to eat out.â€
“You said at first glance, that tells me that you actually found a place.†Shane commented and Jake nodded in agreement as he reached into his pocket.
“Yes I did, literally a few feet from the venue is a Fish and Chip shop called Danny’s.†Jake said as he produced a picture from his pocket and showed it to us, the picture itself showed the outside of the shop and it looked pretty small but then again I remember Lizzie telling me that most Fish and Chip Shops are small in general unless they double as a restaurant. “Once I found a place to park the rental car I entered the shop to see what the food is like.â€
“Lizzie told me that places like that are generally a mixed bag.†I commented with a frown as I remembered a chat I had with the former Bombshell when I met up with her at Bloodstock. “If you find a really good then the food tends to be great, find a crap one and the food tends to be terrible.â€
“To be fair I think the same can be said for most takeout places.†Shane responded as he looked at the picture. “So what’s the verdict on Danny’s?â€
“Food was really great.†Jake responded and we grinned at that. “I had a chat with the guy behind the counter and when I mentioned that I was going to a show at The Forum he said that Danny’s tends to stay open late because of the concert goers.†Jake responded and just like that an idea popped in my head, getting the bosses to agree to it would be tricky but if it worked…. “So I’m thinking that we can go there before the show, grab a bite to eat and then if we’re hungry we can go back there.â€
“Moshing does tend to work up the taste buds.†Shane commented with a grin before noticing the look on my face. “Oh-oh, Jessie has an idea.â€
“You’re not going to let me live down the time where I jokingly suggested streaking through Las Vegas, aren’t you?†I sighed in annoyance and the boys nodded. “Face it Shane, you only hate that memory because of the thought of the whole of Las Vegas laughing at your small penis.â€
“I’m not even dignifying that with a response.†Shane responded as he folded his arms. “And besides, your my fiancé, do you really have to make comments like that?â€
“Just wait until you two get married.†Jake responded with a grin and we gave him mock death glares. “Okay, seriously, what’s your idea Jessie?â€
“Well that depends really.†I commented as the boys took sips of their drinks. “How drunk would the bosses have to be to even consider letting us take the cameracrew into the pit tomorrow?†I asked and they spat out their drinks.
“They’d have to be drunk enough to knock out an elephant and a Krogan respectively.†Shane responded and I grinned at the Mass Effect reference. “Wait, your serious aren’t you?â€
“Yep.†I responded and the boys face-palmed.
“Jess, I think they’ll say no the moment you say “pit†and “cameracrew†in the same sentence.†Jake responded and I shook my head.
“At least let me try, I can be very persuasive.†I responded and the boys shrugged as I went over to my phone to call the bosses.
*end flashback*
How did I talk them into it? I basically told them to take any hospital bills for the crew and any repairs needed for the equipment out of my paycheck, yeah really, that’s why we’re doing everything we can to protect the cameracrew and besides, there’s another reason I brought them here.
By now Cannibal Corpse is nearing the end of their set and they are launching into their classic “Hammer Smashed Face†also known as “that song from Ace Ventura: Pet Detective†and naturally the crowd is going nuts for it, however it isn’t a long song so we don’t have to protect the cameracrew for very long after this.
“Still can’t believe that you actually told them to take any expenses that may be required for taking them into the pit with us out of your paycheck.†Jake commented as the song ended and we relaxed for a minute. “Most people wouldn’t be that dedicated to making an idea work.â€
“Most people on the SCW roster aren’t metalheads, what can I say?†I asked with a grin as the crowd cheered around us, however Cannibal Corpse hadn’t left the stage which could only mean one thing, they weren’t ending it with Hammer Smashed Face. “And besides, this is probably the most fun these guys have had all year.â€
“Maybe we should ask them after the show.†Shane suggested as Corpsegrinder grabbed the mic.
“Are you ready for one more?†Corpsegrinder asked and the crowd cheered. “…..DEVOURED BY VERMIN!†Holy shit, when was the last time they played THAT song live?!
Needless to say the crowd went nuts for the last song of the set and even better we were able to protect the cameracrew from damage to the equipment or themselves, finally the song ended and the band left the stage after tossing out picks and drum sticks, neither of which we caught but we had bigger plans than that.
“All right guys, we know you want to go home but who’s up for appearing in an SCW promo?†Jake called out to the crowd and the wrestling fans among them cheered when they recognized me. “Okay, Jessie’s going to do some trash talk among you guys, try to refrain from groping her because one: I’m her brother, two: I’m the designated driver and three: I have military training.†Jake added and the crowd cheered again as I walked up to them and stood among them ready for my promo.
“You guys are probably why I’m not in New York right now for High Stakes IV and I say this: look around me!†I said with a massive grin as I stretched out my arms and the crowd cheered. “As cheesy at it sounds the metal community no matter where they are in the world are a second family to me, the Mean Girls may not understand it since they have brains the size of flees but we are pretty used to being called freaks by morons, aren’t we guys?†I asked them and the crowd cheered. “And next week at High Stakes IV we will show the Mean Girls what it takes to be a true champion!â€
I added and the crowd cheered again.
“I don’t know Cynthia Warren as I never met her during her original SCW run but from what I saw she was good and unlike Veronica I didn’t attack her just because I was teaming with someone new, I embraced the prospect of teaming with her and it’s that unity combined with the lack of unity between the so called champs that’ll lead me and Cynthia on the road to victory!â€
The crowd cheered again and I started with Veronica.
“Veronica, you are truly pathetic, if you were half as good as you said you were then you’d be holding the Bombshell Championship instead of Delia but I guess that diva has to have the entire spotlight to her, doesn’t she?†I asked and the crowd booed. “My thoughts exactly, in fact why don’t we get some opinions from you guy?†I asked and the crowd started shouting out things.
“The Mean Girls suck!†One metalhead shouted and I grinned.
“The Metal and Punk Connection never should’ve lost the titles!†Another guy shouted and my grin grew wider.
“The only reason they have a job is because they suck dick bigger than my costume.†A guy in a cock and balls Halloween Costume, yes, really, said and we all laughed.
“I couldn’t have said it better myself, in fact I trust these guys’ opinions a lot more than I trust those of certain fellow wrestlers and I think you know who! Veronica, these guys may be freaks to you but you’re the real freak hiding behind fake tans and fake boobs to hide your non-existent talent but guess what? We metalheads hate fake idiots like you and I’ll happily expose you for the idiot you are!â€
And next up is Joanne.
“Joanne is the first and probably the last opponent that I actually feel sorry for and that’s for two reasons, one: if I had won the Battle Royal a few weeks back I’d be in her shoes right now and two: she’s teaming with Veronica Taylor and has no affiliation with the Mean Girls otherwise, need I say more? Didn’t think so, what do you guys think?â€
“Joanne doesn’t deserve this!†One fan yelled out and the others nodded in agreement.
“I rest my case, but you can actually help us Joanne by sabotaging your team and costing Veronica titles that she never earned in the first place, will her pride get in the way? I don’t think so, let me put it this way, either you return the titles to one half of their rightful owners or don’t because of your pride and put up with that moron until you lose the titles, make your choice!â€
And with that I decided to wrap things up.
“The Mean Girls’ reign of terror over the Bombshell division will end eventually and I will start their decline at High Stakes IV with the help of Cynthia and, hopefully, Joanne, this is SCW’s Heavy Metal Bombshell signing off from The Forum reminding the SCW Universe too….â€
“MAKE IT METAL!†The crowd behind me yelled out and I grinned broadly.
“What they said! And at the same time I’m reminding the Mean Girls to keep in mind that their days are numbered!â€
The crowd cheered as we finally dispersed and the scene faded.