[Kate Steele]

 In the Mind of A Nurse
Blog Entry
Feeling: Ok… Like I am Mediocre At Best



Sometimes in life things don’t really go the way that we had hoped that they would. I mean in one aspect we expect the best from ourselves. We expect to always go out there in every outing and show everyone that we are tough as nails. That we have the heart of a lion, and the whole world should look out when we roar, but quite often those roars turn out to be nothing more than hot air. We end up falling short of where we see ourselves so then the question of what next comes into play.

Where do we go? What do we do? Are we even on the right path? And are we even in a position to where people will start to take us seriously? As it stands right now I see myself right smack in the middle. I don’t see myself impressing anyone. Matter of fact I think I should take all of that back. My performance has been that of underwhelming. I haven’t done anything that would warrant capturing the hearts of anyone.

I have simply beem there. Going through the motions to simply collect a paycheck and not really putting any effort into anything that I have been doing. It really is a shame when you think about it. I have only been in four matches during my tenure in SCW and I can’t even say that opportunity hasn’t been knocking on the door.

Four matches and have already been in a position to compete in a championship on two seperate occasions. Yet when the pressure was on and I had the chance to show myself to the fans and everyone watching. It was simply an opportunity that went to waste, and that pains me deeply. I know there are some who would cherish to have the same opportunities that I have been given. They would love to have one simple chance at glory just so that their name can be heard.

Yet it was right there on my doorstep and I dropped the ball. I didn’t seize the moment and I let it past me by as Emma Rose is still your champion. So here I am in a position on what I should do next. Is there really any reason to answer this question? I have hit rock bottom and I am in a place where I cannot go any lower. In all my matches I have come up on the losing side of things with the exception of the one time where I had the pleasure of teamming up with Electra Styles and we won a match.

But besides the one match with Electra it’s always the same old, same old. It’s always me getting pinned or thrown outside of the ring. Someone else claiming a win over me and this cycle continuing on and on. Some habits need to be broken out of and this habit of being a failure needs to come to an end.

What a better place to make it come to an end than on Climax Control when I will have the opportunity to step in the ring with longtime SCW bombshell Vixen. Vixen you are perhaps one of the best woman to have ever stepped foot inside of an SCW ring. How many people in this company can say that they have honestly been a Triple Crown winner? Not only Triple Crowner but the only Grandslam Champion.

Not many can really claim that but you can Vixen, and not only can you claim it but you can say that you were the first to do it no less. That in itself is very impressive, and I just want you to know that you have my respect for everything that you do.

But as much as I might respect you. As much as you might be the best woman to ever step foot in a ring in this company. Truly the facts speak for itself. The fact is we are both set to be on a collision course of sorts. I am looking to break out of my shell, and receive that breakout moment defining win. A win that can get me on my way and lead me to bigger and better things.

You are looking to jump back into the fray. I am currently in your way and by beating me it will have shown that you haven’t missed a step, and you can go for whatever it is that you seek. If you had plans on returning back going all out with a blaze of glory you have another thing coming because this nurse is one who will not be taken lightly. One thing that I refuse to be for anyone is a welcome mat.

You can’t just walk all over me and have that triumph return, and that’s why I am treating this match as a must win match. All the cards are on the table and I am coming in for the kill. Consider the nice girl act thrown to the side. I am tired of being a pushover, tired of not getting mine. You want a fight? You are getting a war. Bombs are going to be dropped and only the type that a blonde bombshell like me can dropped.

So just sit back and have a seat Vixen. The nurse will indeed see you now. I can tell just from the looks of things that this return doesn’t look so promising for you, but for me… For a woman who has nothing to lose. Who has everything to gain from beating a woman like you. I have everything to gain.

With my back pressed against the wall and no possible way that I can spiral downwards. Expect the fight to cometh. So run little fox. Hide run away because this is not the type of nurse that you want to cross. Expect a prescription of pain to follow.

Have a seat, Nurse Cindy will see you now. You are in for a check up and this nurse isn’t in the mood to be handing out a lollipop. Bring it… At least when it’s all over you can expect me to hand you a band-aid. That’s the least I can do right?







The scene comes into focus and we can see Cindy Warren sitting down in her hotel room. She is sitting down on the edge of her bed. Arms are crossed over her chest as she just shakes her head not knowing what to say or make of anything. Her husband Jimmy is right by her side and he offers a simple shaking of his head as he looks down into her eyes.

“Look babe I know you are upset but it’s just wrestling. Losses will come and go. That’s just the nature of it sometimes. For you to get so worked about it is very unhealthy. It’s never good to bring yourself to the point of insanity. I know the four stages of grief are hard. Shock, Denial, Anger, and Acceptance. It’s hard to be stuck in limbo between denial and anger but you have to move on and reach acceptance. You just have to wave it off so you can focus on what’s on the horizon… So get some sleep so we can think about what to do next.”

Cindy opens her eyes up as she glares daggers right into Jimmy. “Save that medical bullshit for someone that wants to hear it. Look Jim you just don’t understand. I can accept the fact that I lost but I was the first person eliminated. Do you know how that honestly makes me feel? I didn’t enter wrestling to simply lose all the time. I didn’t leave our daughter with my parents to drop the ball the moment the spotlight started to shine on me. I feel like am being a letdown. A let down to you, to my parents, our daughter, and….”

Cindy looks upwards at the ceiling as she offers a long sigh in return. “And to Richard. It’s just so much. All I wanted was to work my way up from the bottom all the way to the top. I never thought that I would honestly become this big attraction upon entering the doors of this company. I mean a title match, a chance at a title match, and it’s only been four matches in. All of this seems like it’s happening so fast, and I am not living up to what they expect of me…”

James walks to the front of his wife as he places a single finger on his lips. He smiles before he shakes his head at her. “Shhh don’t say that Cyn you really don’t mean any of it. First of all your daughter is too young to even know whats going on. I doubt you could do anything to disappoint her. Scratch that what you are doing right now would be a disappointment in her eyes. Do you think Terra wants to see her mother beating herself up getitng upset over a loss? Do you think Richard would be that upset that things didn’t go your way? Cindy you haven’t been doing this as long as others have. In my eyes you are pretty much still a rookie. You are still working out the kinks in your ability and over time you will improve and get better. Who cares if you were the first one eliminated in a match. Are you really going to sit here and let this one lost bother you that much? Or will you are supposed to do. Will you pick yourself up learn from your mistakes and work even harder so that you won’t be eliminated first in the following match.”

Cindy just shakes her head shrugging her shoulder. “Save the better luck next time speech for someone else. I honestly don’t want to hear it…”

James takes a seat beside his wife as he sighs looking deeply into her eyes. “Look Cyn it has nothing to do with some motivational speech. This is just me being honest. Remember when you became a nurse? Remember how much time it took into actually becoming one? It just didn’t happen overnight, and you didn’t become this nursing sensation. It took going to college. Going to nursing school. Interning, working under someone. Passing your tests, and finally getting a job. It took years of hard work and dedication to eventually become that nurse. Well when it comes to being a wrestler it really isn’t that much different. The same rules apply except instead of saving lives you might be doing the exact opposite. Doing everything that your parents loathe. Placing people in the hospital and what not.”

Cindy rolls her eyes as she glances back at her husband. “Gee thanks… Thanks for the “motivational” speech”

James eyes light up as he squeezes her tighter than before. “Hey like I said I am just here to tell it like it is. Besides nothing wrong with sending a few people to the hospital. I mean at least you will have work if you choose this wrestling thing isn’t for you… Or this is a chance you yourself might get sent to the hospital. Leave you in a state where a doctor like myself may have to operate on you and what not. Operating may be the first step. There might need to be facial reconstruction, which could give me the perfect chance to just go ahead and give you a boob job and…”

“James…”

“Yes dear?”

“Just stop talking… You really aren’t helping things… Actually you did help with something.”

James eyes light up as he looks at his wife. “Is it sex?”

Cindy shakes her head as she stands up slowly taking her robe off. “Ohhh it’s better than. Why don’t you step outside for the room for a minute and I will tell you.”

“Well damn.. On that note…” James quickly rises up out of the bed as he runs outside the hotel room door. He stands outside as Cindy slowly puts her robe back on. She grins winking at her husband.

“It’s called you better find a different hotel room to stay in tonight because you aren’t staying in here…” She grins as she slams the door in his face leaving a barely dressed Jimmy standing outside the door.

“Babe come on stop playing. You can’t leave me out here like this. My wallet is in the room. It’s late and…”

“You should thought about that before you opened your mouth and acted like a jerk. You can come back inside in two hours. I want you think about your “motivational” speeches for a bit. Why are you so worried? You are a doctor right? I am sure you will find a solution to your diagnosis… Good night James…”

Cindy smiles as she can be seen heading towards her bed. Leaving Jimmy outside. Jimmy slumps against the door hoping that other hotel guests wouldn’t see him like that.