“He’s not a bad fellow, although an imbecile at his profession” - Arthur Conan Doyle
Sit Ubu, Sit
Las Vegas, Nevada - Bane House
/Scene Opens\
[Off-Camera]
Fall had arrived in the desert, well, fall for Vegas anyway. It was still very warm, not to the point of being sweat inducing but pretty close. The nights were cool and becoming crisp, well crisp for a thin blooded Texas guy anyway. The sun still had not come up, but I was outside by the fire pit with a cup of coffee and a cigarette. I had been trying to get some things sorted in my mind, things around my relationship with Amber mostly. I relight the cigarette, for probably the third time. It always seems that when my mind is overloaded or I feel overwhelmed, she appears out of thin air. This morning was no different, the hurricane painted red, Amber Ryan was everything I had wanted in a woman, lover and partner in this crazy shit we call life. I can count the number of people I would take a bullet for on one hand. Three of those were my children, my oldest friend, “Godly” Ken Davison and Amber Ryan. I had fallen so hard and so completely for this woman it truly boggles my mind at times. I continued to watch as she approached clad in one of my t-shirts that looked like a dress on her, and leggings. She folded her legs up under her as she sat near me by the fire pit.
“This is early, even for you Mac. Something bothering you?”, she asked calmly if not politely. I give her a knowing smile, “Not anything wrong, love, trying to figure some things out is all.”. She crinkles her nose at me, “I knew something was causing you some sleepless nights.”. She pauses to take a sip of her coffee. “The match with Barnhart?”, she asked. I chuckle a little, “No, I’m not worried about that semp in the least.”. “No, this is about us Amber, that’s what has been causing me sleepless nights Darlin.”. She looks at me with obvious concern, “Not quite sure I follow…”. I smile and lay a hand on hers, then lift it up and kiss her knuckles gently. “I’ve been thinking about us for a long time my love.”. “It’s not anything negative, as amazing as we are together, the future, that’s what I’ve been thinking about.”. I pause for a moment to judge her reaction, never play poker with Amber by the way.
“I love you, Red, and I can’t imagine my life without you. The real question is, what does that future look like?”, I sigh, then smile. “I know this is far too deep a conversation to have at five in the morning.”. She looks at me with a deer in the headlights type look, “Well, i did ask…”. I shoot her a wink, “That you did.”. She frowns, but only for a moment, she then grabs my hand with both of hers and returns the gesture, kissing my scarred up knuckles. “Same old man, I couldn’t imagine my life without you being in it.”. I chuckle, “hey now, watch that old stuff.”, and I shoot her a wink. That was one of the running jokes between us. “But you’re such a pretty old man.”, she winks at me. I point to my face, “This old thing?”. Thanks to timing, I almost get her, the coffee almost comes out of her nose as she struggles to swallow. “Ass!”, she exclaims almost angrily. “Yes ma’am.”, I smile knowing that in this case close was close enough. I smile with pride at the accomplishment. You’ve no idea how hard it is to surprise this woman much less catch her off guard.
Fade
Las Vegas, Nevada - Bane House
/Scene Opens\
[off-camera]
Family dinners; they’ve been a thing for my family for a long time. One of the things in this life that brings me joy is watching all of them enjoy what I’ve prepared. This was one of the few times that I wouldn’t allow anyone to help with the dinner. My kids and most of my friends love Amber, but I wanted to be sure they could all co-exist. This was extremely important to me, regardless of what I do in the ring, things outside the ring hold just as important a place in my heart. The menu was made up of mostly Texas foods. Smoked brisket, smoked pork butt, collard greens, cornbread, black eyed peas, and peach cobbler for dessert. It was really my first time to cook for Amber in this kind of setting. Come to think of it, I didn’t know if she could cook. It didn’t matter really, this was one of the few times in months that we’d had time for anything like this. As we sat down to eat, I seriously thought that her eyes were going to bug right out of her face.
Amber, “I had no idea….”, she stammered to complete the sentence. Jimmy laughed, Jules glared at him. “That I could cook?”, I asked her. Then Jules turned her glare on me, “Duh”. Then the whole table erupted with laughter. “Ah, you probably don’t remember, but we were in a place called Boardwalk together and I used to do this for the talent there.”, I smiled as I completed the sentence. “That might have been before I got there.”, she shrugged. I return the smile, “Probably, that was a long time ago.”. Jules all throughout the dinner had remained in a state of discontent. I of course had felt the buzzing in my pocket as my daughter had likely tried to covertly tell me something. So, I dug my phone out, seven messages from Jules. “I’ll be right back, I need to go see about this.”, I say as I raise my phone up. I stepped onto the back porch and looked at the messages. They all said the same thing.
When are you going to ask her?
I smiled at the message, I knew that my daughter loved Amber, looked up to her even. That made me happy. Jules was a mess after Melissa died, and I probably didn’t help at all, because so was I. So, I reply to the message.
Soon kitten, very soon
I return to my position at the table and smile at everyone, “I apologize, but it was important.”. Amber smiles and nods, accepting my explanation. Jules is a much happier kid after I replied to her message and doesn’t say much still. Being a father, well, it will teach you patience. Being a single dad raising a teenage daughter will re-teach you what you believe patience is. I had set the phone on the table and it buzzed again. I see a brief preview of the message, “When?!”. I shake my head. “Nope, that can wait.”, I declare and grab the phone and fling it over the couch.
I laugh as I watch my childs expression, Jimmy knew what was going on and couldn't contain himself any longer. He continues to try and hide his amusement and begins to laugh. Amber of course had become suspicious and was watching the exchange. I hold up my hands to forestall the eruption, “I promise, I’ll explain later. It kind of goes along with the talk we had the other day.”. She nods and then begins laughing, “Oh!”. Again the table erupts with laughter. After a moment the laughter dies down and Jimmy has questions, Jimmy always has questions. “Pop, what about this Barnhart guy?” I level a steady gaze at my son, “James you know my rules, no work talk at the dinner table.”. He sighs in exasperation, then looking over at Amber he asks another question, “So, when do we get to start calling you mom?”. “Oh, for fucks sake.”, Amber says quietly.
Fade.
In Studio
/Scene Opens\
Once again in my recording studio. I’ve found over the years that these are the types of things that pay for themselves quickly. An in-home studio is ideal for this type of work. With the camera showing online and my focusrite amplifier showing good levels, I start out standing, I want to show the audience that I’m very serious about this match. I begin…
”I’ll be the first one to admit that I don’t know much of the history of Sin City Wrestling. What I do know is that like myself, Barnhart has never won anything here. Not anything that mattered anyway. You talked a lot of shit, Clownshoes.”
I pause there and smile at the camera.
”I refuse to call you by your moniker, it’s an insult to the animal in question. By comparison Bill, a dog is a brain surgeon, you’re an idiot. Too many shots to the head with a chair?”
In contrast to Bill, who did nothing but talk about his past failures, and there was a list of failed title attempts to his credit.
“ I don’t dwell on past accolades or failures, there’s a ton I could talk about but since it didn’t happen here, why would anyone care?”
My smile slowly slides away, replaced now with a look of contempt for the slob I’ll have to share a ring with.
“You don’t seem to have any respect for someone you know exactly zero about. It’s really not hard to find information on me, I’m just a google search away. You do know how to use Google, right? Guess they didn’t teach you about that in Georgia, huh?”
My expression lightens but only slightly so that my level of disgust is obvious.
“So let me clue you in Billy boy. I have a great many advantages over you. We’ll start with relevance. I know that words with more than one syllable are problematic for you, so I’ll explain what that word means.”
I allow a small smile to return to my face.
“ It means I matter Bill.”
The smile remains as I continue.
“ I’m the only person in this match that has any relevance. I know that will be hard for you to digest and probably even understand. This is my second match in Sin City boyo. Think about that, just for a moment. My second match in this company will decide a new number one contender to face someone that you’ve never been able to beat. Not only that, you tapped out.”
My expression takes on a more serious note as I talk about my physical limitations.
“I do have a couple of disadvantages in this match as well Bill. Both knees have been scoped, and I’ll be turning forty-five soon. So I’m definitely at a disadvantage when it comes to age and wheels. You already know this I’m assuming, not that the knowledge will do you any good.”
The stern, business as usual expression remains.
”The important thing to note here Bill is that you have to be smart enough to actually take advantage of that. You’re not exactly a road scholar sir. A dirt road scholar maybe….nah...not a chance.”
I approach the camera slowly to emphasize a few points.
“For some odd reason, people like you believe that you have the market cornered on violent matches. That makes me laugh, when they bring it up.”
I extend my index finger to count it off.
“See, I’m a technician in the ring Billy, I don’t need to use weapons to win a match.”
I extend my second finger.
“Gimmick matches to me are just for the crowd and do exactly nothing for the wrestler. Because, Billiam I can bust you open with my bare hands.”
Ring finger extended.
“All I need are the soup bones that I swing around, they’re called fists for those of you following along at home.”
Pinky extended now.
“Maybe the most important part in all of this and you’re going to find this out Bill. I’m a very old school kind of guy.”
Finally my thumb comes out, and then I close it into a fist.
“I value tradition, a dedication to an elevated standard that most wouldn’t understand. A lesser number of people would even appreciate what I’m doing and the goals I’ve set for myself.”
I lower my fist and lean into a close up of my face and the final words I need to impart.
“You’re not special triple B, you’re just next in line to serve as a speed bump on my way to bigger and better things. I don’t expect you or anyone else to believe what I’ve said here today, but your true advantage, and you can tell them all about it. You can tell them how your game was elevated by “The One Man Wrecking Crew’ Mac Bane and that you’re forever grateful. See? You don’t have to believe it, you’ll get to live it, and they’ll get to watch it unfold in that same old inevitable way. You don’t get to win this one Bill, but I’m sure there will be success in your future endeavors.”
Satisfied with the end results, I set down to package the recording to send off to Sin City Media Relations.